The campaign. (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1866-1866, October 12, 1866, Image 1

Below is the OCR text representation for this newspapers page. It is also available as plain text as well as XML.

    --'-'q-PMMMMW,IWIJI I in 'II
"TINS TICKET, TirJ3 WHOLE TICKET, AND NOTHING J3UT THE TICKET."
. K.ri!A met
- , ... -J'.-i t. - jhi '-.' . . ; " .
"Km
4 VOLUME I.
Tho Beauty of Old Ago(
1 Ot"f EN think each (rtllrrlrtB fiirin,
That limps uloim III life's decline,
Onco bore n heart as yuuni,',.ns w.u in,
As full of Iilln faults in mini-1
All t (vi"li Inn had lt dream of Joy,
IU own unequalled, pure romance;
Cjininencliu when llio blushlm; boy
I'lrst thrilled at tovcly wom-m's Rhinco.
Anit cash could li-ll lil Inlc of youtli,
VtVouM think Us not'iii'1 of love t'vliira
iort' pin ilon, more tiiiem lily truth
Vrh.in nny Ulo before or'sluce,
Yp.iI thry could It'll of tender lays,
At mldnlulil penned In classic shades,
sotfay more bright thin modern days
.4 And luilds more, fair than luaJern maids.
Of wlilsperi In n wllllnj cnr i
Of kl04 on a lililthliu plu-ok j
liicli kl, mich wltNiwr far ton iloar
Vour lU hl.'rn lips tn Rtvo or spoil!;,
'Of p'vulou to imtlni'ly crottL'tl
f Of pmlom nllslitt.l or bt'troyi'il
Of klii'lrtnl Hplrltn early hut,
'Ami huJj thai IjluisuiirM but tn fmlo.
Of,bo vittiom ys nn 1 triM-tcM say,
Klastle form .mil iiobhi hrow,
Ami f'jrnn that nil lmvo pa-nwl uwav,
Ati l Iffl tliciii wh it Wf M tli-iii now.
Ami U It thin Is liuin m lovo
Hj vory llht nn I frail u lhln?
."nd mutt ynuth'-t brluUU'st vlslo.i inovo
Kort'ver on Tlnia'M rostlo-ti wlni ?
Mint nil thp oyn tint "till nro bvl'it,
An 1 nil tho lips that t ilk of bliss,
And nJl tho forim bo fair to.slht,
HfrrafttT only conic to this?
'Then what nre all P'lrlh'n treasures tvnrth,
.If wo nt loii'jth must losi them thus
If nil we vnluo most on earth
Krc loni? must faile nwny from u ?
N-
-A SKETCHING ADVENTURE.
" Isn't it a beauty V" win my (rrcot
inp; rw I Htrollcil oiio'inornlng into tin1
taloon of our little inn.
Inn't what a beauty?" answered I.
"Thin pistol. Klliot boiif,'bt it in Iby
onno yesterday Tor my liirtli-ihiy jires
cnt. I think It's tho vory 'prettiest lit
tle tiling of tho kind I ever saw In my
life ; Isn't it, Mr. Campbell ?"
" Jry dear Mrs. Hnrdiiifie," r replied,
Amazed, " wliat in the world put it into
your head to want a pistol? "What non
sonso ! who do yon suppose is (join"; to
hurt you?"
" I don't know, maybe no one, nor
nothinjr, and I dare-ay it's very filly;
but when I'm out skotehliif? or walking
by myself miles away from homo, 1
fancy I uludl feel more comfortable if 1
lmvo some Hrt of a protector witii me,
Although I don't suppose I shall ever
meet with anything dreadful, of course,
or I shouldn't j;o alone."
" Well," said I, after a minute exam
ination, " it certainly is a perfect little
affair. Take euro you don't shoot your
self, tiiat's all ;" and with a iatifjliin
promise on her part to "try not," wo
went onr different ways for an hour or
two, to prepare as usual for tho expedi
tions of tho day.
.'Wiint blind mole-s wo are! How lit
tle did either she or I imagine that be
fore another day dawned her life would
banff on the way she ti-ed that little
revolver; that in a few hours her fate
would bo to meet that " something
dreadful," m lightly spoken of Ju-t
now, to conquer St, fir dio one of the
most horrible deaths possible to be con
ceived !
We. were a very happy wrj'evinrw;
Elliot llardinge and her wife ; I, John
Campbell, and mine. AVo had jrot tired
el" tho coast of Ui.-f.ty, where wo had
Hpent the early part if the Winter, and
tiken to tho little village anion; tho
I'yrcnees, where there was very nod
Ushintr, and occasionally plenty of shoot
ing besides. Our wives sometimes ac
companied tw im our excursions but
Very often mine, who was rather an in
valid, remained at home, while Mrs.
llardinge, a perfect slavo to her color
,)jqx, .would go out alone, sketching,
leaving Elliot and me to our own devi
ces. .Thus it had been arranged for tho day
In'miestlon. Elliot, his wife, mid I start
ed all together ; but wo two left the la
dy, at tiie entrance of a small valley
which ran at almo-t right angles with
tho tract of country wo intend Miootlng
over, in passing which one day she hud
funded -omo particular view or another
won Ul make a good subject for a pic
tuTV, and determined to take advantage
of the warmth of tlii.s unlucky Friday
to'lmvo n long day's work there. Ac
cordingly, wo bade eaeli other good-by,
mjhI went our beparalo ways, .she, of
course, went armed with her revolver
and. plenty of ammunition ; " for who
knows," quoth -he laughing, " hut that
J may have to kill a giant or two before .
I return."
At tills point of my story I mu-t
chaiigo places with Mr.-. Uardinge, and
lot'Ker tell her own tale as sho told it
to us long afterward, when sho had in
Mine measuro recovered from the horri
bio.cH.eets of tills terrible day.
"i'lio weather," said she, "was so
dplldous), and tho scenery so beautiful,
that,lnjtoad of sitting down at onco to
jriy work, I wandered on, always believ
ing I could cap tho present view with
the ouo I should get by Just climbiii'.'
tJjQ brow of tho ne:;t hill; this one
Jeil to another, and tho one to Mill
(mother; and I hail only Just begun
tolind out that I had strayed much
further than 1 had intended, or than,
Indeed, was quite pafu at tills time of
yrar, oven though I had a grand new
jifejol to tako caro of mjelf with,
When 1 awakened to tho vory un
pleasant fact that tho mm was rapidly
df-mppearhig behind tho high moun
tains to the west, and that 1 should
hoon lmvo only moonlight to help mo
lliul my way bad: again. Of cour-e,
sketching was now quite out uf the
question, and I turned round somewhat
anxiously to sao uhat way-marks I
could remember to have pa.--.eil lu thu
morning. Luckily, tinMih l.mg, th-
valley wiw straight, and in tho open
ground Just in front of tho gorge by
which It communicated with the more
extended country beyonU tiiero was a
group of cork-trees, the peculiar t-hapo
of which rendered them distinguishable
from tho bushwond which clothed the
bases of the mountains. Luckily, too,
the valley, precipitous and rugged on
either side, had nearly oven ground,
perhaps half a mile wide, upon which,
when onco readied, tho walking would
be easy. So, though tho trees were n
good three miles oil", and I was nlreatly
stifllclently tired, I calculated that I
should roach them In about an hour and
a half, all hindrances considead, and
once there, I should bo only nno milt
from the inn; ind, after all, I ilatt.'red
myself, 1 could get homo hofor? you,"
shoHald, addressing her husband, "and
tho others) had begun to be frightened
about me.
"Oil" ( started, therefore, and walked
away with a will, lu less than half an
liour the sun .et, and for a while it was
almost totally dark. To press on, not
minding tho stumbles and occasional
falls, and to keep up as bravo a heart as
I could, was all that was po-ib!o ; and
I had got nearly to the end of the la
wood, eltxo to tho open ground which
I had not dared try to roach by a direct
scramble in tho dark and could soo the
cork-trees looming largo in the glim
mer of tho rising moon, when I thought
I heard a peculiar cry far away behind
me, and 1 paused for a moment to lis
ton, thinking there might possibly lie
some other belated wanderer in the
dark as well as my.-olf.
" l'or only one moment. Tho next 1
was mailing along as fast as terror could
drive mo, sketching tilings, cloak, um
brella, everything which might impede
my flight tiling away; for in that one
moment all 1 had ever heard of tho now
seldom seen l'yrenean dogi, their terri
bly acute i-cont and horrible ferocity,
flashed through my mind, anil 1 knew
by instinct, that thu sound that 1 had
heard was the cry of ono of them as it
had stumbled on my trail, ami that the
whole pack would be upon mo long, 1
feared, oro I could get oven as far a-tho
cork-tree.
"At llr.-t, as I tied along wildly,!
gave my.-elf up for lo-,t, for the idea of
defending myself never once occurred to
mo, so paralyzed was I with fear; hut
as I went on and iieard the occasional
cry, and hungry yapping always nearer
and nearer, the horror of the threatened
death rou-ed in mo a courage I had nev
er known before, and remembering
now, in fearful earnest, my revolver, 1
resolved to sell my life, at all events, as
dear as I could.
"At this moment I gained tho open
ground. The moon, white and bril
liant, lighted up tho valley, and brought
intostiong relief the group of cork-trees
not far away now, and which, oil I if 1
could but roach, I believed I might yet
escape.
" i pulled out my revolver, hardly
abating my speed, slipped the safety
stop, and made for a little thicket of ju
niper some fifty yards in front ; for now
tho cruel 'yapping' sounded do-er and
clo-cr, and it seemed as it' hundred's of
savage beast.- wore at my heels; if I
could not stop them so as togain a little
time, 1 must bo torn to piece- in a min
ute. Suddenly facing them as 1 reached
the juniper, and instinctively remem
bering tho direction to fire low which
you gave mo, you know, Elliot, I shot
off each barrel uj quick as lightning,
then rushed on again. That 1 had killed
some, at all events, was evident by the
growling and fighting of the others over
the dead ones, I knew that the dog",
now-a-days, were never known to de
scend to the valleys until driven by ac
tual starvation, and, also, that when
hungry they did not scruple to eat the
dead of their own kind ; so I ran on, at
the same time rein uiing tho pistol, my
hope being that by tiringnmong thopae'k
I might gain the timo they look while
they stopped to devour tho-o which
were lulled.
j tow ii wa.-, i iiou i Know; J .sup
pose every one lias felt tho same when'
tho llr.-t brunt of a great danger has!
been endured, and ono remains for tho I
moment still in safety ; hut as I ran l!
felt a reckless coarago.and a, so to speak, 1
determination nut to hu killed, took po. i
session of me. On 1 went, my pace a
littleslackeued, for I feared my strength
would hardly hold out ; and 1 was con
gratulating myolf upem'tho precious
minutes I was gaining, when 1 hoard a
single 'yapp' so clo.-e behind, that an
agony of terror put for a moment my
late courage to flight, and J almost fell
down paralyzed, as, turning my head,
I saw two glaring eyes within a yard of
mo. In less time, however, than it
takes to tell you, I revived again, tired,
ami waiting only to see that tho dog
was disabled, struggled on onco more ;
and now, only a fuw yards from tho
trees, 1 was looking to see which would
bo tho best to tako for, when tho pad;
camo on again in full cry. Alas ! there
was no juniper hero for a defence for my
back, ami I know all must bo lost if
they onco got to clo-o quarter; so I
turned again, lot off all thu barrels pret
ty nearly at random, and thou made tho
last effort I felt would be possible, for I
was well-ulgh exhausted, and at hist
readied tho trees.
"How I bciambled up ono of them 1
don't know, nnd wiiat bocauieofmu for
a while I don't know ; I fancy 1 to-t coii-eloiHiies-
altogether; but when I cairn
to myself, and looked down on tho noa
of glaring eyes below, it was nlmCd
nioiv lli.m I could endure. Vet it wa.
i'v' lf.it t.iat tl. . i nut acvJi nn ,
BLOOMSBTJRG,
leap and Jump as they might; all tho
tales 1 had heard of creatures gnawing
trees down lu which their prey was
-oated, I firmly believed to be pure lie
lion, so all that I had to do to b ! sale,
appeared, after all, to sit still where 1
win.
" lint for how long? 1 had only three
cartridges left. 1 could not bo sure of
the number of dogs In thu pack, but
there were upward of fifty at least,
and whether they only attacked at
night, or were equally savage during
the day, I knew not. Hut oven should
they remain long, which was not prob
able when once they found that their
prey wns out of reach, I remembered
that you would be tire to come to my
help when you found I had not re
turned;' nnd T was comforting mv.-elf
' with this assurance when it flashed
through mo that you would, as likely as
not, eomo without your guns, and ii
you did, nothing could save you. This
was tho worst of nil, and as I sat think
ing of it tho old dews of helpless dread
gathered on my face, and I put back
the shrill wlilstlol always carried when
wandering alone, and which I was ju-t
going to blow, lost it should give you
too true a clue to my placoof refuge.
"How long I Hat crouched among the
brandies of that friendly cork-tree,
turning these hopes and fears over in
my mind, 1 hardly know. It mu-t
have been an hour at least, for tho moon
1. . I j h i . i
nan iravcneu over mo valley, and was
setting behind the snowy mountains
beyond, when from tho opening gorge,
mentioned before, there camo a shout I
1 knew tho voice well, Elllot.und wait
ed without an-wering, lest you should
lie alone. 1 think the few minutes of
Mi-penso wliich followed were more in
tolerable than anything which had yet
happened! Hut very soon there camo
another shout, and then several voices
together, and almost at the same mo
ment the glare of torches, as a whole
party of men turned into tho valley.
Tho relief was too great, f tried to
shout, too, but my voice died away in
my throat. I tried my whistle now,
but the -ound that I produced was too
feeble to be lteard far away. At last, by
a bright thought, I fired oil' my throe
remaining cartridges, and then you
know better what happened and what
became of me than I do myself.
What happened, and what became
of Mrs. Uardinge, was as follows:
As we neared the grove of cork-trees
so often alluded to in the above recital,
and to which we were directed bv the
sound of the pi-tol, the pack of dogs
left their unsatisfactory employment of
gazing nt the food which was unattaina
ble, and came music to attack us. Hut
wo were prepared for them, and they
received two or three vollevs so Well-
directed and telling, that alter coming
to us once again, they betook them-elvos
to the shelter of the brushwood on eadi
side tiie valley. I said wo wore nrenaitd
for them ; for, returning liume from our
expedition about an hour before, wo
were met by a peasant who told us that
lie and some others hud seen the first
pack of wild dogs remembered for up
ward of thirty years, de-cending from
tho High Pyrenees toward the.-o val
leys ; and as tliey certainly were not
faraway, it was not sale to be out, un
less in a party, and well armed, for they
were always desperately savage; they
had doubtless been driven from their
liiiis, he .-aid, by tho long continuance
of cold and snow.
" Which diroc'ion had they taken?"
asked we, with a view to a possible
day'.- sport on the morrow.
.Judge' of our honor when tho man
named tho valley Mrs. Hardinge
had cho-on for her walk that morning,
and pointed to tho mountain immedi
ately ovjrhaiigiug it as thu place where
he bad seen them.
Uofore lie could finish his sentence I
wo wore hurrying home at ourutmo-ti
speed, hoping to find our fears needless,
and her .-at'dy returned. When, how
over, wo got there, hours later than sho
usually remained nut, our hearts failed,
when, to our quick question, " Where's
Mrs. llardiugi,'.'" my wife replied, "1
don't know, she has not como in; 1
thought sho wa.- with you !" In-tiintly
the alarm was given, tho whole village
was aroused; every man armed with a
gun rallied round us, and wo took our
way to the entrance of tho valley, si
lent ami sick witii apprehension fur the
falo which most likely uro this had
overtaken her.
Alter tho rout of tho dog.,, wo has
tened to tho tree.-, and climbing that in
which, by the light of our torches, wo
could see Mrs. J iai dingo,lif.cd her down,
Hlio was quite lii.-eiisihle, though, fur
ther than bad bruises and tears, appa
rently from falls and thorn-, she seemed
unhurt ; at all events, there was no
mark of tho dogs upon her. Wo car
ried her homo, and did all wo could to
restore con-clmisiie-s ; but alas ! the
horrors she had gone through had been
too groat, and It was many, many days
before sho recovered from their elfecls.
It was not, Indeed, until three weeks
afterward that she was able to give us
llio preceding account.
She still treasures her little pistol as
the chief saviour, under Providence,
of her life, but wo who heard the tide-o
iinall'cctedly told, thought tho pistol
would have been but of lltlio u-e, hud
it not lioon for tho wonderful pluck and
Imost int'ivdlhlo courago which laid
Imrno her through hours, of danger,
more appalling than olieu falls to tho
lot of a man to endure, much lesi to that
of a lady.
It ! hardly mvi ... n-y t.t add th it th it
wa, t.it last time 1 i.u Ian, bed ..t ;.
MID AT, OCTOBER 12, 1866.
lady for asking for a pistol as a birth
day pre-ent.
" Marbol."
MA v, lin!l I tell you what my tl irllnjj' lllto
if I mil nhle?
Iter name Is Amabel-I enll her May,
And sometimes Mabel.
She's lllto n princess u n fairy talo
Or poem nMeit,
Willi en lil, ii 1 1 mi l I v- eyes, mid wavy lintr
'I hat's luurly golden.
Her liamls urn delicate, mill ninull, ninl while,
And very skilful;
She's Knmi'lliiifs reasonable somi'tlinn kind,
Hut ori'ncr wilful.
Sho plays like St. OeellU 'when ho likes),
Hut she's capricious;
To hear her shin the " Jewel Sony from l'aust"
Is most ilullclousl
Infi'!lnv's "Trust her v, sho's foolln- thcol'
Kcinhiils int'of her:
They say she dories In that fatal pow'r
Which makes all love her,
What matters nil they say? I urn bowltch'il,
And cannot low her:
1 would she Hern more real but who bins
Must not be chooser."
So sho Is still my ilnrlltiz. All my hopes
Are centred lu her.
And 1 inn milling w.tltliijj for the tlmo
When I may win her I
CONCHUXING STORIES.
Tun liewiideriugiiuniberof new mag
azines and tlioainount of material, Mich
as it is, which goes to fill them, is not
tlio least wonder of our time, llcsides
tiie leading tale, tho piece of poetry, the
column of jokes, or tho solid article,
wliicli nearly all contain, there is usuallv
a short sketch or story, and it is with
this branch of periodical catering that
wo lmvo to deal. If examined closely,
tlie-e stories indicate a great deal more
than would appear on their own show
ing. First on the score of antiqtiltv,
they can claim priority over the big
novel it-elf, which precedes them in
order of place, and Is being slowiv con
ducted upon an illustrated career under
the direction of a popular author. He
fore the novel camo thenovelette, oi-
uni'utun before mmo. Stories areprolni'
bly as old as -peech but your novel I wo
use tho word in its ordinary acceptation)
always from its length, required to Ik
booked. The Greeks: told stories, and
very good ones. Antonitis Diogenes
went in for a regular romance the loves
of Diidasand Dyrcyilis; but it po'-es.-es
nothing in common with our works of
fiction, except, of course, tho element of
tender pa-sions, without which nothing
of tiie kind could move. Hut the Greek
tales were excellent. Kvon inthe Greel
Christian times, when 1'an was dead,
capital adventures were struck out.
winch, if they dealt rather freelv with
sacred subjects, one is inclined to con
done for their o.Tencos on the ground of
no harm done.
Ju the middle ages these talcs wen
re-echoed along with others, and enrich
ed, too, willt marvels brought from the
Kast, monsters from the Xortli, and
plenty of devils from tho monastic leg
ends. Then there were the jongleurs,
minnesingers, and troubadours, who
traveled on the strength of a popular
taste for ver-o-stories; but if report
speaks true concerning the jongleurs,
they added to their reWofVc.i an attrac
tion similar to that which brings nightly
crowds to the ballet music halls uf Lon
don. Italy is regarded as the direct
sourto of our novels and novelists.
Iiaccaccio'o tales were known under tho
latter title, and to .-omo Italian stories
we aro said to bo indebted for "Tiie
Merchant of Venice." Tho middle age
narratives were all pretty nearly of one
color, and of rather a high flavor for our
generation, but many of them were both
clever and call-tic. Longfellow gives
an excellent imitation or adaption of
one in ids "Martin Franc; or, the Monk
of St. Anthony." t )ur Kngli-h tales of
the Elizabethan age aro singularly dull
and pointless. After tho liestoratlon
they were livelier, when, to paraphase a
hackneyed quotation,
"Th" taste liei-mi" in ire (lallj.iiiil less nice;"
but in tiie days of Queen Anno, under
the direction of Mr. Addison, the sto
ries wore niero galvanized abstractions,
thinly dl.-gui-od allegories, in which
Greeks and full-bottomed wig of thu
" Spectator's" Kouiaiis impaired ele
gant precepts in tho period. Nor was
the great lexicographer a good story
teller. In the " Humbler," men and
women aro made to speak language as
lino and as impiobablo as tho speeches
which tho worthy doctor proscribed for
Ills tory favorites lu tho IIou-o of Com
mons. Goldsmith, however, was a de
lightful narrator; the "History of thu
l'hilo-ophle Vagabond" is a goni in this
way. Fielding had a heavy manner of
going about a story; butSniollet was a
master in tho craft. When tho Delia
Crii.-can gushing spoiled our poulry,
stories In that strange tongue appeared
in "Amulets" and "Souvenirs." The
plates in those books used to bo Delhi
Cm-can too finical, nerveless, and em
asculate. A great improvement took
placein tliepalmydaysof " Iliad; wood,"
" Fra-er," and "Heiitley." A sort of
Hogarlliiaii humor pervaded the shorter
tales a humor of which the contempo
raneous urll.-ls caught a fair share of the
spirit. Magi nn, Thackeray, Harhuni,
and Lockhari were seldom better than
when conlliU'd to chapters instead of
volumes, it Is remarkable, Indeed, that
as stories fast gave rl-o to novels, we
may notice that every romantic writer
of original power K'lids up a few pilot
balloons, fa-liioiied in ids own peculiar
stylo, before venturing tliograud ascent.
Mr. Dickon.- felt his ground with Do. ;
and the author I' " Vanity Fair" In
tra tod M.dtatJ Anyeiu Titiii..r.sli wbh
samples of his ware, previous to making
ids own proper appearance. Hero we
claim an argument fur our plea, that sto
ries precede books. In tholatol'rofessor
Ayloiin's hands the art of btory-telllng
did not degenerate; but for occasional
blots of "wilt" they would ho perfect
of their kind. There is real fun lu lii-
tales, and fun is the prime characteristic
of them.
To add another feather to tho story
cap, it Is said that Foe's wild in volition's
contain tho germs of more than one sen
sation novel, and that a vory clover
author who works the sensation depart
ment mado the dl-covery at an early
period of his literary career. There is
.-omo truth, wo believe, in this, but not
at all enough to nniko out tho least pro
text for a diargo of plagiarism.
It is not easy to meet with n good
story now; such n ono as Tom Hood or
.Ierrold could write such a ono as was
wont to light upthc pages of ningiiidnes
which erst ' weru disagreeably tinged
with political war paint. Every week
tons of periodicals aru carried from the
news-agents, and sown broadcast over
the land, and nearly all contain some
thing in the shape of a novelette. It is
well for the makers of those literary
confections that our literary society,
with its complicated wants and new
pa-Ions, supplies them with an inex
haustible quantity of raw material.
They have fifty plans for serving the
crumpled rose lear which interferes with
thosybaratlsm attributed in penny and
hall-penny papers to tho upper classes.
They can pile the delicious agony on a
louniiatlon as slight as the gos.-amcr
trouble which shades tho brow of Un
lovely countess when dear Lord Ernest
Adolplius Fitz Howard has missed
bringing her down to dinner, or, as ivo
ought to .-ay, led her to the scene of fes
tivity. They can bo cynical at Hurl's.
but with tliatairof killing Don. I nanism
which reminds us of, " O, Mr. Snnobs!
how can you ho so sarcastic?" In Hie
sentimental vein they havetdmo-t come
round to see Miss Seward again. Wo
have recently seen both pictures and
letterpress in a popular monthly, fra
grant of the " Forget-me-not" and " lli-
jou" of our grandmothers. As for sto
ries of tlio genuine story kind, thov aro
as hard to ilnd as real Madeira. Tiie
editors, wo suppose, are compelled to
accept tho rubbish which is shut out on
us through dearth or better; the mo-t
hopeless thing about those inventions
would seem to bo, that they show no
where that "genius in the making," as
it were, which years ago resulted in
"l,endennis,"aiid " David Copperfleld."
Visitors in a Printing Ofllco.
Dl'itiMi the ab-enco of the Hoss, Yes
terday, we had visitors. A blooming
lass, iter home-spun, practical mother,
tnd that inevitable nuisance, the " bio-
hoy" (big boys are humbug-, tlio world
over), a brother of the blue-eyed lass.
I lie good lady informed us that thov
were on a tour of inspection, and wisli-
d " Main, mam ( h ! .Mam," inter
rupted that in boy, plucking at the
ilaitsof her lire--, behind. " Wliat'slhis
yero? I gosh," pointing at a Job press,
opening and closing Its vertical inkv
Jaws with automatic regularity. The
matronly spectacles beamed on the ma-
hinery for a moment. " I do not know,
my son it seems like something that
don't Jknow what it's a-doin'; keeps n
cumin', but backs again as much as it
comes. 1 wonder in my heart if it ain't
the Tennessee Legislator?" The blue
eyes looked brightly at tlio mother, and
then, on tip-toe, whispered "lly-trap!"
"Mam, I gosh! I toll you what, hit
minds mo ovo a yoke of niggers a Iiuz-
zm walcli 'em come together t liar,
d'yosouthat stickin' squeeze? now watch
cm come apart do you hear tliat'.'sl
gosh! lie! he!"
"JV son," and tho biuto was fairly
looked into silence in an instant those
pcctacles have a wonderful focal power
to he sure. The blue eyes were beaming
on us, wo knew th" were, lor wo felt
as though oiirohook was being pencilled
with a butterlly's wing, dipped in attar
of roses, while the dim echo of long lost
nitislo wlii-porod in our ear. Wo foil
very good, indeed. Wo wore aroused
by the good lady. " Well ! well ! law
me! children, look back yonder! If
thar ain't a wool-cardln' moishean.
with a fly brush to keen tho snooks
U' llio rolls; how nice!" Wu explain-
d to her that it was a power press,
in which our paper was printed.
" Dear, my soul, mo! is it? xw, mis
ter, doshowiuewharaboiitslnlho trick-a-boli
blears aro bred made, I mean to
ly," and she placed tho turkey-tail fan
before her no 'o. We could do no better
than point to tlio inking apparatus.
" Well, well ! what is tlio world a coin
in' to next; hut, mistor, don't they look
sorter inuckoy, tho', jlst in their nateral
tato?"
Wo admitted they did, and thought
the term inuckoy might ho applied to
many Ideas lu thdr llui-hud suite, but
we did not say so. ".Mum, say main,
ax him what them fellers area inoiioiiiu'
at over tliem slupin' tables?" Wo an
swered, distributing typo, sir, and wo
pronounced sir sharp enough to out the
whelp's throat, "oh, dod rot cm, 1
thought they went skoorlu flies outeu
them littlu boxes," Tho blue eyes fell
iVoiiioiii'.s tothoflDirlikoaiialrof strick
en liuinnilng-hli'ds. Wo fear that wo
had been, perhaps well, staring. Tlio
old lady now bethought herself that It
was tliuo to go, so sho led tlio 'way. As
the lug hoy brought up the rear, wo ills
coveiv I tnat hf had h vu -f.ii.'ii on the
to.'..i t t .v. t'.'i, ' ,..s rear
on ids white cotton p.uits, wo read in
largo letters, "Young Ilulldociis this
fine mil ,' etc. Wo never said a word,
and felt In our hearts that ho was most
welcome to tho Ink. As tho good lady
bowed herself out, sho asked us " how
Mr. ivins likes his honey?" Heavens I
now, when too late, we lmvo learned that
sho is Mrs. Jarrold, that tho bluo eve-
belong to 'the "bud of promise," and
that walking proof-sheet of a liorso 1)111
is Jonas, " tho boy of genus." Now
look out Tor a storm, when Mrs. .1.
sees that proof tlio weather will change.
( titttanouga Gazrttc.
Almost an Elopement.
Yi:sthkiay morning, at quite an
early hour, tho family of one of mil
citizens was thrown in a state of fever
ish excitement by tlio tnalcr fumUht
who Imagined sho heard stealthy foot-
stepson tlio back stairs. The father of tin
family was awakened and n-sured that
the hoii-e was full of burglars, and that
the family would bo murdered in less
than a minute, unless something was
done. The old gentleman hastily drew
on his pants, lighted the cual-oll lamp,
seized tlio poker, and sallied forth in
search of the robbers. What was ids
surprise, instead of finding tho house
full of desperadoes, to moot on the
landing ids good-looking daughter with
a bandbox on ono arm and a largu va-
lio pendant from tho otiier. Fattier
was, of course, In Justifiable rage; de
manded to know of Sarah Jane wind
tills meant, and what she was doing nn
and dres-ed at so unseasonable an hour.
Jti.-t at tiiis moment camo a tap on the
liall door, and a masculine voice in a
suppres-od tone, sung out: "Hurry,
darling, I'm waiting." Light began to
break in on tiio enraged parent, and iio
transferred his attentions to tho street
door. Daitsrlitcr oxnostulated. liemreil
pa not to go out there or lie would catch
his death or cold ; but pa was unrelent
ing, and in a moment stood on the
porch, confronting a six-foutor witii
-iivage niuustaclio and a full travelling
rig. Fa, of course, stormed, ordered
Sarah Jane back to bed, and for that
time, at least.a runaway match was pre
vented. The lovyor was last soon at one of our
livery stables, settling for a two-liorse
single-seated carriage, which lie swore
had proved too wide for ono and not
wide enough for two. Sarali Jane last
evening was looking quite disconsolate,
and spoke of plighted directions and
young hearts breaking for love. Wo
have reason to believe, however, that
she will recover. ,S7. .otejii b'nhit, 25.
Hints to Husbands.
Do not jest with your wife upon a
subject in wliich there is danger of
wounding her feelings. Keniomborthat
-ho treasures every word you utter,
though you may never tliiiik of them
again. Do not speak of some virtue in
another man's wife to remind your own
or a fault. Do not reproach your wife
witii a por-onal defect, forif she has sen
sibility, you inflict a wound dilllcult to
lioal. Do not treat your wire with inat
tention in company ; ittoucliesherpride.
and she will not respect you more, or lovo
you any tl;e better for it. Do not upbraid
your wife in tlio presence of a third per
son. Tlio sense of disregard for feeling
will prevent her from acknowledging
her fault. Do not entertain your wife
with praisiii!.' the beauty and accom
plishments of other women. Do not,
too often, invito your friends out to ride,
and leave your wife nt home. Sho
might suspect that you esteem others
more companionable than herself. If
you have a pleasant homo and cheerful
wife, pa.-s your evenings under your
own roof. Do not bo stern and silent in
your own lioti.-e, and remarkable fla
vour sociability ulsowhoro. Homember
that your wife lias as much need of rec
reation as yourself, and devote a portion,
at least, of your leisure hours to such
society and amusements as sho may
Join. By so doing, you will secure her
smiles and incroa-o her affection. Do
not, by being too exact in pecuniary
matters, make your wife feel herdeponii
onco on your bounty. It tends to les-en
her dignity of character, nnd does not
Inorea-o her esteem for you. If sho Is a
sensible woman, slio.-liould be acquaint
ed with your business and know your
income, that sho may reyrulato her
household accordingly. Ho it remem
bered that pecuniary affairs cati-e more
dllllculties than any other cause. Your
wife lias an equal right with yourself to
all you po-.-ess lu tho world therefore
sho should be mado acquainted with
that which is great importance to both.
Sermons.
Tin: ru-tom of taking a text as the
basis of a sermon is said to have origi
nated about the tlmo or Ezra, who, ac
companied by several Levi res in a pub
lie congregation oT men and women,
ascended the pulpit, opened tlio book of
law, and after addressing a prayer to
tlio Deity, to which the people tald
"Amen," read tho law of God distinct
ly, gave tho sense, and caused them to
understand tlio reading. Previous to
the tlmo of H.ra (fourhiindred and fifty
seven years before Christ) tho patriarchs
delivered In public assemblies dthor
prophesies or moral Instructions for the
edification of tho people; and It was
not until tho return of the Jews from
Habylonlan captivity, during which
time they had almost !n-t the language
in which the Pentateuch was written,
that It became iiece. ary to explain as
I'-'oti no tvt r'ii iiu iipmrcs ,o un.it.
NUMBER 1.
a practice adopted by Ezra, nnd slnco
universally followed. In later times
(Acts si: ,'H) tlio Hook of Moses was
read in tho synagoguo every Sabbath
day. To tills habit our Saviour con
formed, and In tho synagogue, ono Sab
bath day, read a passngo from tho
prophet I-alah, then dosing tlio book,
returned It to tlio priest and preached
from tho text.
Tho Showman.
Tirrn, ladies and gentlemen, is tho
distinguished hanimal vlcb Isknownns
tlio Hamcrican Voodchiick, first discov
ered by General Christopher Columbus,
on his first voyage to tho voods of Ha
uiorlky. Christopher saw him quietly
seated upon a bank of clover, a viewing
tlio sotting sun, and a vondoring vot
voiiid become of it. This ero is ono of
tlio descendants of thosanio voodclitick,
ns may ho beastly scon by his general
happoaraiico, vldt Is both beautiful nnd
striking. Ho is a solitary crcedmr, and
is called voodclitick because ho lives In
tho vood and tho boys chuck stones tit
him. Holms hair upon ids baclt and
upon his belly, and Ids tail is much tho
same. His eyes aro at tiio opposite
ends of tho lxxly, and assist him in tiio
amusing occupation of seeing, vich ho
can see In tlio dark tw veil as In tlio
light, Iiolso bo vouldti't live in oics
bunder the ground. Like most lianl
niatod tilings, lie is fond of enjoying
himself, vich ho does in n vory nmiablo
and hinteresting vay. Ho obblcs along
upon the ground, veil nobody Is looking
vaothes tho birds in tlio trees, and tries
to sing like them, vich lie lias never suc
ceeded in doing; but this Is not his
fault, because ho hasn't got any feathers.
Tho voodclitick lives a good vile. My
huncle ml von vat lived some time, but
finally died; though there Is no tolling
how long ho would avo lbycd if it vasn't
fur that ere haccident. llowing to tho
quiet life vich tlio voodclitick henjoys,
l avo sometimes vislicd I vas a vood-
chuck myself. Hut then tiiero is not
lioxciteinent enough in it for a show
man, though I can say, as llelauder re
marked to Diogenes, " If I vero not a
bowman I vould bo a voodclitick 1"
Here, ladies and gentlemen, is tlio wcry
oss on vich tlio Duko of Valentino slew
tho Lord Napoleon Huonaparto! Stir
him up, John, and make him kick a
bit!
Old Things.
Givi: mo old pong, those exquisite
bursts of melody which thrilled tho
lyres of tlio inspired poetsnnd minstrels
of long ngo. Every note has homo on
tlio air a talc of Joy and rapture, of sor
row and sadness. They toll ot d.iysgono
'by, and time has given them a voico
that speaks to us of those who breathed
tboso melodies; may they bo mine to
hear till life shall end; as "I launch my
boat" upon tiio yeas or eternity, may
their echoes bo wafted on my oar, to
cheer me on my passage from oartli to
fatherland!
Give mo tho old paths wiiero wo have
wandered and culled tho flowers of
friendship in tho days of " Auld Lang
Syne." Sweeter far tho dells whoso
echoes have answered to our voice?,
whoso turf is not a stranger to our foot
stops.nnd whoso rillshavc in childhood's
days reflected back our forms, and tho-o
of our merry playfellows from whom
wo lmvo parted and meet no moro in
the old nooks we loved so well. May
tlio old paths bo watered with Heaven's
own dow, and bo green forever in my
memory !
Givo mo tlio old house upon whoso
stairs wo .00111 to hoar light footsteps,
and under whose porch a merry laugli
seems to mingle with tlio winds that
whistle through tlio old elms, beneath
wlioso branches lie thu graves of those
who onco trod tlio hullo and made tho
chambers ring with glee.
Add 0, abovo all, givo ino old friends,
hearts bound to mine In life's sunshiny
hours, and a link so strong that all tho
storms of earth might not break it asun
der; spirits congenial, who.-o hearts
through life liavo beat in unison with
my own. O, when deatli shall still this
heart, I would not ask for aught moro
sacred to hallow my dust than the tear
of an old friend.
Tho A-io.
Tin: oilier day I was holding a man
by tlio hand a band as firm In its outer
texture as leather, and ids sunburnt faco
was as indexible as parchment j ho was
pouring forth a tirade of contempt on
tlio-e who complain that they can get
nothing to do, as an oxcuso for becom
ing idle loafers. Said 1, " Jen", what do
you work at? You look hearty and
happy; what tiro you at?" "Why,"
.-aid he, " I bought mo an axe threo
years ago that cost mo two dollars. That
was all Jhe money I had. I wont to
chopping wood by tlio cord. 1 have
done nothing else, and cleared moro
than six hundred dollars; drank no
grog, paid no doctor, and lmvo bought
men little farm in tho Hoosler State,
and shall bo married next week to a
girl who has earned two hundred dol
lars since she wits eighteen. My old
axo 1 shall keep in the drawer, ami buy
mo a now one to cut my wood with."
After 1 left him I thought to myself,
" that axo and no grog." They aro tho
two things that maku a man in tills
world. 1 low small a caplt d that axe-
how sure of success with tlio motto, "No
grog!" And then a farm and a wifu,
tlio best of all.
An object of Interest A girl wlioso
interest 1, tliroetliiiu-iinddolliiisiiyeur'
A 'lAtii r of form -rl'a'se caives.