Terms of the "Ameiucax."
HENRY B. MASSEUTIwibiiri, As
JOSEPH EISELY. $ PnormsTORs.
II.
tt. TMSSCil, Editor.
orrica is market street, near beer.
THE ' AMERICAN" is published every Satur
day nt TWO DOLLARS per annum to be
paid half yearly in advance. No paper discontin
ued till all arrearages are paid.
No subscription received for a less period than
six mouths, All communication or letters on
business relating to the ollice, to insure attention,
must be POST PAID.
From the Lancaster Examiner.
The Whirlwind.
IT MISS JVMET It. LEWIS.
The Whirlwind 'would take a walk one da; ,'
(And a very fist 'walker is he.')
So bustling about,
He at length set nut,
With a strp light blithe and free.
'Twas plainly seen, as he rush'd along,
He was bent upon frolic that d iy ;
He whistled with glee
Or sang merrily,
For his heart was glad and gay.
His path Iny straight through the dark gieenwootl,
And away o'er the mountain's broad blow,
His track you might tiace,
In every place,
For he left his marks, I trow.
The Asp was the first to heir his voice.
And she shook through each br.inch at tlio sound;
The timid young tree,
Trembled tearfully,
As she sank upon the ground.
The HicKonr beheld his sister fall,
And exclaimed with an ill-natured sneer
'She's nervous to day.
And doth fiiut away ;
3uch weakness can't flourish here !'
As onward tho whirlwind came, he heard
The rude siofl'er unfeelingly jes' ;
So wrenching about,
His old trunk so t-tou',
The strong one was laid at rest.
The Piss saw tho Hickory's shivered trunk,
nd bowed low rs tho wind whistled past;
Hut the courtesy,
Of the nodding tier,
)id not save hun from tho Mast.
'he Oak in defiance tossed his head,
'or a veteran right held is he
lint a single stroke
Felled the mighty Oak ;
las, for the proud old tree !
ii ! onward still and his mighty breath
ings an anllicm ofglud triumph now,
And he laughs to see
Each old forest tree,
t his coming meekly bow.
he blooming Haw heard the Whirlwind's voice,
lid it filled her with weighty alarms ;
lint he loved the blush
Of the flow'ring bush,
nd bore her oil' in his arms.
i ! onward still ! o'er the land he sweeps,
ith wreck, and ruin, and rush and roar;
Nor stops to look back
On his tlreaiy hack,
it speed to the spoils before !
From the American Sentinel.
1 'he IriiiiUnrr Child' Lament.
I never knew a lathei's love,
My sire ne'er breath'd a prayer for mo,
Dm if his voice was raised above,
I ll was, to curse mi bitterly.
I never knew, what 'iwas to see,
A fathi r's kind approving look,
Dot if he ever smil'd on me,
It wus a smile, 1 scarce could brock.
I never knew what 'twas to feel,
Or look on him with filial pride,
Dut if his name would o'er me steal,
Abush'd, I shun'd the sp; aker's side.
I nrvpr knew what 'twas to watch.
His c.in. ins home, in childish play,
lint when I heard him lilt the la!ch
Trembling with feur, I shrank away,
I've of ion gone with playmates home.
And a. en them climb their father's knee,
Anil he would smile, to see them come,
And all would seem so full ol glee.
Rut ah! at noon, or eventide,
t dread my father.B step to hear
All's cheerless at our lireoide
And mother's cheeks are pule with lear.
Ah yes! I have one friend on earth;
Vet still 1 boast a mother's love,
And from the hour that gave me birth,
Have well her kind ulTeciiun proved.
When sick at heart, I Rick my home,
Wiih sorrow on my brow impress'd,
Hiie soothes my woes, forgets Iwr own.
And lulls me in her arms to rest.
How oft she sits in silent prayer.
While my own sire is railing by.
And eh! how oft her features bear,
The marks of his biutality.
Ah! who that has not felt, can tell,
What pain, what anguish, fill our heart,
And with whut shame, our bosoms swell,
To see him act so huso a part.
Oh, Thou ! w ho to the fatherless,
H ist promised Thou'lt a Father be
And 'specially tho widow bless,
Who puts her only tiut in thee;
Oh ! wilt Thou not in mercy bow,
Thine ever gracious, piiying ear I
Wilt Th.iu nut be my father, now,
Wilt Thou not hear my mother's prayer !
Yrs, tho' my fathet's heart' so hard,
And we are too, by sin d filed,
Still Thou wilt bo my nwthi r's guard.
And Thou wilt shield the druiikuid's child.
Cookixu Jjkets. Take beels of mid
dle size, and after removing the tops
and dirt, roast them in a lire as potatoes
arc roasted. When done, they are
peeled and served up in the usual man
ner. One who has tried them in this
way, says they arc much sweeter and
richer than when boiled. Alb. Cult.
S UN
Absolute acquiescence in the decisions of the
Iy Massor & Elscly.
Origin or nioriiioiilMit.
At the request of some of our readers,
we republish a well authenticated ac
count of the origin of Mormonism,
which was inserted in the Keligious
Telegraph and Observer on the iith of
May last. This account of one of the
grossest religious impositions of our
time, was communicated to the Uoston
Recorder by Rev. John .Storrs, under
date of Ilolliston, Mass., April 8th,
His letter to the editor of that
paper is as follows :
Dear Sir: As the pastor of the
Congregational church and society in
this town, I have had occasion to come
in contact with Mormonism in its gros
sest forms. Consequently I have been
led to make inquiries relative to its ori
gin, progress, anil so far as they have
any peculiar sentiments of its votaries.
My object in this has been, as a faithful
pastor, so far as possible to arrest the
progress of what I deem to be one of the
rankest delusions ever palmed on poor
human nature. However, not suppo
sing that the readers of the Recorder
would be interested in the details of
Mormonism in general, I send you for
publication in your valuable periodical
the following communication, ns a pa
per of unusual importance, giving a cer
tified, sufficiently well attested and true
account of the origin of the "Rook of
Mormon'' or "Golden Bible," as it is
sometimes called: on which the whole
system mainly depends. And here
perhaps it should be said, that the lea
ders of the delusion pretend that the
book was dug out of the ground, where
it had been deposited for many centu
ries ; that it w;ts written on certain
metallic plates, in a peculiar character
or hieroglyphic; that the finder, a man
of money-digging memory, who was
accustomed to look into the ground by
the aid of a peculiar stone, was in a si
milar manner enabled to read and trans
late it. Hence, what is sometimes cal
led the Mormon Bible. But not such
is its origin, according to the following
communication.
The occasion of the communication
coming into my hands, is as follows:
Having heard, incidentally, that there
was a lady in Monson, Mass., whose
husband, now dead, was the author of
the book, I requested in a note, Rev. 1).
R. Austin, Principal of Monson Acade
my, to obtain of her, for my benefit, and
to be used as I should think proper, a
certified account of its origin with her
husband: for the character of which
lady, I wished the venerable Dr. Ely
and himself to avouch. The following
highly satisfactory document came in
reply. '
ou are requested to insert it in the
Recorder, not so much because it will
interest the majority of your readers,
but that the facts, well attested may bo
laid up in memory and the number of
your papers containing them being kept,
may afl'ord the means to an enlightened
community, to refuse so great an impo
sition on the world. 1 would not only
respectfully bespeak its publication in
tho Recorder, but in other papers ; 1
would it were published throughout the
land ; for many Mormons are stragg
ling throughout the country endeavor
ing to propagate their notions ; and with
some success with a peculiar class of
people. The origin of this pretended
revelation being thus completely au
thenticated, may save many minds from
delusion, fanatacism and ruin.
Yours respectfully,
John Sroitiis.
ORIGIN OF TIIK DOOK OK MORMON,"
OR "(iOLDEX MULE."
As this book has excited much atten
tion and has been put, bv a certain new
sect, in the .lace of the sacred Scrip
tures, I deem it a duty wmeli l owe to
the public, to state what 1 know touch
ing its origin. That its claims to a di
vine origin are wholly unfounded, needs
no proof to a mind unperverted by the
grossest delusion. That any sane per
son should rank it higher than any other
merely human composition, is a matter
of the greatest astonishment ; yet it is
received as divine by some who dwell
in enlightened New England, and even
by those who have sustained the charac
ter of devoted Christians. 1, earning
recently, that Mormonism has found its
way into a church in Massachusetts,
ami has impregnated some of its mem
bers with its gross delusions, so that ex
communication has become necessary,
I am determined to delay no longer do
ing what I can to strip the mask front
this monster of sin, and to lay open its
pit of abominations.
Rev. Solomon Spaulding, to whom I
was united in marriage in early life,
JBUJRY AMERICAN.
AND SHAMOKIN JOURNAL.
majoti'y, the vital principle of Republics, from which
Suiibiiiy, Xorlhiiiiihrrlaiul Co.
was a graduate of Dartmouth College,
and was distinguished for a lively ima
gination and a great fondness for histo
ry. At the time of our marriage, he re
sided in Cherry Valley, N. Y. From
this place we removed to iev Salem,
Ashtabula county, Ohio; sometimes
called Conneaut creek. Shortly after
our removal to this place his health sunk
and he was laid aside from active la
bours. In the town of New Salem,
there are numerous mounds and forts,
supposed by many to be the dilapidated
dwelling and fortifications of a race now
extinct. These ancient relics arrest the
attention of the new settlers, and be
come objects of research for the cu
rious. Numerous implements were
found, and other articles evincing great
skill in the arts. Mr. Spaulding being
an educated man, and passionately fond
of history, took a lively interest, in
these developements of antiquity ; and
in order to beguile the hours of" retire
ment, and furnish employment for his
lively imagination, he conceived the
idea of giving an historical sketch of this
long lost race. Their extreme antiqui
ty of course would lead him to write in
tite most ancient style, and as the old
Testament is (he most ancient book in
the world, he imitated its style as nearly
as possible. His sole object in w riting
this historical romance was to amuse
himself and his neighbors. This was
about the year 181'J. Hull's surrender
at Detroit occurred near the same
time, as I recollect the date well from
that circumstance. As he progressed
in his narrative, the neighbors would
come in from time to time to hear por
tions read, and a great interest in the
work was excited among them. It
claimed to have been written by one of
me tost nation, ana to liavc been reco
vered from the earth, and assumed the
title of " Manuscript Found." The
neighbors would often inquire how Mr.
S. progressed in deciphering "the man
uscript," and when he had a sufficient
portion prepared he would inform them,
and they would assemble to hear it
read. He was enabled from his ac
quaintance with the classic and ancient
history, to introduce many singular
names, which were particularly noticed
by the people, and could be easily re
cognised by them. Mr. S. Spaulding
had a brother, Mr. John Spaulding, re
siding in the place at the time, who was
perfectly familiar with the work, and
repeatedly heard the whole of it read.
From New Salem we removed t
Pittsburg, Pa. Here S. found an ac
quaintance and friend, in the person of
Mr. Patterson, an editor of a newspa
per. He exhibited his manuscript to
Mr. P., who was very much pleased
with it, and borrowed it for perusal.
He retained it a long time, and unfor
med Mr. S. that if he would make out
a title-page and preface, he would pub
lish it, and it might be a source of profit.
This Mr. S. refused to do, for reasons
which I cannot now state. Sidney Rig
don, w ho has figured so largely in the
history of the Mormons, was at this
time connected with the printing ollice
of Mr. Patterson, as is well known in
that region, and as Rigdon himself has
frequently Muted. Here he had ample
opportunity to become acquainted with
Mr. Spaulding's manuscript, and to
copy it if he chose. It was a matter of
notoriety and interest to all who were
connected with the printing establih
ment. At length the manuscript was
returned to its author, and soon after
we removed to Amity, Washington Co.,
Pa., where Mr. S. deceased in ISlti.
The manuscript then fell into my hands,
and was carefully preserved. It has
frequently been examined by my daugh
ter, Mrs. M'Kenstry, of Monson, Mass.,
with w hom I now reside, and by other
friends. After the "Book of Mormon"
came out, a copy of it was taken to
New Salem, the place of Mr. Spaul
ding's former residence, and the very
place where the "Manuscript Found"
was w ritten. A w oman preacher ap
pointed a meeting there, and in the
meeting read and repeated copious ex
tracts from the "Book of Mormon."
The historical part was immediately
recognised by all the older inhabitants,
as the identical work of S., in which
they hud been so deeply interested years
before. John Spaulding was present,
who is an eminently pious man, and re
cognised perfectly the work of his bro
ther, lie was amazed and utllicled,
that it should have been perverted to so
wicked a purpose. His grief found
vent in a flood of tears, and he arose on
th spot and expressed in the meeting
his deep sorrow and regret, that the
there is no appeal but to force, the vital p.imiplo and
Saturday, Mairh fi, IS 11.
writings of his sainted brother should
be used for a purpose so vile and shock
ing. The excitement in New Salem
became so great, that. the inhabitants
had a meeting, and deputed Dr. Philas
lus If iirlbut, one of their numbers, to
repair to this place, and to obtain from
me the original manuscript of Mr. S.,
for the purpose of compartng it with the
Mormon Bible, to satisfy their own
minds, and to prevent their friends from
embracing an error so delusive. This
was in the year 18UJ. Dr. Hurlbut
brought with him an introduction, and
request, for the manuscript, signed by
Henry Lake and Aaron Wright, and
others, w ilh all of w hom 1 was acquaint
ed, as they were my neighbors when I
resided in New Salem.
I am sure that nothing could grieve
my husband more, were he living, than
the use which lias been made of his
work. The air of antiquity which w as
thrown about the composition, doubtless
suggested the idea of converting it to
purposes of delusion. Thus an histori
cal romance, w ith the addition of a few
pious expressions and extracts from the
sacred scriptures, has been construed
into a new Bible, and palmed oil upon
a company of poor, deluded fanatics,
as divine. 1 have given the brief nar
ration, that this work of deep deception
and w ickedness may be searched to the
foundation, and its author exposed to
the contempt and execration he so just
ly deserves. Matii.oa Dwinsox.
Rev. Solomon Spaulding was the
first husband of the narrator of the a
bove history. Since bis disease, she
has been married to a second husband
by the name of Davidson. She is now
residing in this place : is a woman of
irreproachable character, and an hum
ble christian, and her testimony is wor
thy of implicit confidence.
A. Ei.v, D. D.
Vaxtur of Cutir. Church in Mtmsun.
D. R. AcsTix,
I'rincipal tf Muhkoh Academy.
Monson, Mas., April 1st. ISi'.i.
Ci'Kioi s axu Important. We see it
stated in a foreign paper, that M. Zel
ler, director of the Agricultural society
of Il:irni, tailt. in 1K!)I, j. I.i, iied I WO plots
of ground of the same size, with pota
toes. hen the plants had flowered,
the blossoms were removed from those
in one field, while those in the cither
were left untouched. The former pro
duced 170 lbs., the latter only .'i? lbs.
Cracks in stoves and stove pipes arc
readily closed bv a paste made of ashes
and salt, with water. Iron filings, sal
ammonia', and water, make a hard and
more durable cement.
Hens will, it is said, be sure to fur
nish an extra quantity of eggs, il you
deal to each about a gill of oats per
day.
C minus K ii I lint-lit.
Nome few mouths ago, I made a curious mil in
lrrcrfliiig experiment, an account of whk:ti may be
int. r. stiiig to many, mid useful to line of the rea
dt is of the Journ.d. I tilled a white til .s.- I .imp, of
a globular shape, wi h clear spiing water, pieced it
in the window at about leu o'clock of a ile.ir warm
morning, in a position to rcciivc thn rays of the
sun. In ono minute, ii pce el p!ac!e silk which I
had placid within h ill an inch of the i;1js-s and in
the fucui, became ignited. Tho rays uf iho bun
can thus be collected through a body ol clear water
and a comm. n while glass lamp liny be made to
serve the purpose of a burning lens,
I placed in theunie I amp, siisjM-n led by u thread
ill the water, several coloicd glass head . A hi le
iliftai.ee from the lump I fixed a tdici t of wh.te pa
per. The rays of l!ie nun pissing through thu wa
ter and the he-ad, threw upon the surface ol tho pa
per a variety of the most beautilul color, that im 'g
iiiation can pictutc.
At firt thought this may not be considered of
much importance, but every Ihing thai goes to
illustrate iho perfection of tho woiks of the Crea
tor in a simple and cay w ay, is useful and bene
ficial to our lace. A". V. Journal if Commerce.
(Insular I)!i' rry.
Nix miles north of Manchester, Flip., on the line
of tho Polton railway, fivo trees have been found
in the excavation made at that place, which op'ar
to have been partly enlivened to co d. Tli'y seem
also to stand ill the p!aces where they grew. The
roots arc imbedded in a sufl argillaceous shale, im
mediately under a thin bed of roul. The buk of
the trees is conv. rte I to coal, from one quarter to
threo ijuartcr of an inch thick i the substance
which has taken the place of tho interior of tho
tiees is khulc, 'J'he laigot of the trees is I5jtctl
in circumference at the base, and height 1 1 feet.
Yot Ncali-s Ail Act is pasiwJ in the Dela
ware I. egiM-iture, granting premium of f2 j on the
scalp of every fo killed in Suswx county, in thut
Sinte.
immed
ia'e parent of desp.itisin. Jefferson.
Vol. I Xo. XXIV.
The Shrplirrd's Dos;.
A shepherd who inhabited one of those valleys
or glens which intersect the Grampian mountains,
in one of his excursions to look alter his fl.ick, hap
pened to carry along with him one of lii children,
an infant of thric years old. This is not an unu
sual ractiee amongrt the Highlander, who accus
tom their children fiom the earliest infancy to en
dure the rioiits of tho cliiiinte. After traversing
his pasture for some time, attended by his dog, the
shepherd found himself under the necessity of as.
cending a Riimmit nt romp distnncc, to have a more
extensive view of his range. As the ascent wsb
o fatiguing fur the child ho 1. ft him on a small
pluin at the bottom, with strict injunctions not to
stir from it till his return. Scarcely, however, hud
he gained the sihnmit, when the horizon whs daik
ened by one of those impenetrable mists which fie
quently descend so rapidly amidxt these mountains
as, in the space of a few minutes, ulmost to to in day
to night. The anxious father instantly hastened
buck to find his child; but owing to the unusual
darkness, and his own trtpidation, unfortunately
mUsed his wny in the descent, Afer a fruillw
search of many hours, he discovered that he had
reached the bottom of the valley, and was near his
coltnge. To renew the search that night was cqua'
ly fruitless and durigeious; he was therefore coin
pclled to go home, although hu had lost botli hi
child and his dog, who hud attended him faithfully
for many years. 'St xt mornii g, hy break of day
the shepherd aceompinied by a band of his neigh
bors, set out in t-earch uf the child ; hut ufier a day
hpctit in fruitless fitigue, he wus ut last compelled,
by the approach of night, to descend from the nniun
t.iin. On his lemming home to his cottage, Le
f iund that tho dog, which he lost the day before,
h id been home mid on receiving a piece of cake,
had instantly gone off again. For several succes
sive days the shepherd renewed his search fir his
chilJ, and still, on returning homo disappointed in
the evening, ho found that the dog had been home,
and on receiving his usual ullowance of cake, had
instantly disappeared. Nnuck with this singular
circumstance, he remained ono d y j and when the
dog, as urinal, departed w ith his pie; e of cake, he
resolved to follow- him, and find out the cause of
this strange procedure. The dog led the way to a
cataract at some distance from the spot where the
shepherd had left his chid. The banks of the cat
aract almost ji.incd at the top, yet, separated by an
rbys of immense depth, pi e-mted that appearance
which so often astonishes and appals the travellers
, . u.i-ui.ioiiis. non one
thai frpj---
of thiv-c rugged, and almost perpendicular descents,
the do began without hesitation to make his way,
and ut la'-t disappeared by entering into a cave, the
mouth of which was ulmust level wilh the torrent.
The shepherd, with difficulty, lollowedt but on en
tering the cave, what vveie his emotions wlun he
beheld his il.fanl eating with much satisfaction the
cake which the Jog had ju-,1 brought him; wb'le
the faiihful animal i-lood by, eyeir.g his younij
charge with the utmst complaisance ! From the
situation in which the -hi! I was f iund, it appeared
that hu bad w andered to tho puvipice, and then
lilher fallen or fctaiuMcd down till he reached the
c ,ve. The do by ine.iis of his scent, had traced
him to the spot ; and afterwards prevented liini from
.-t iruug, by giving up to him bis ow n dally allow
ance. The Wife of lVtigulil Mexi art.
(u the December Xo. of the London (.Quarterly
Iteview, we find a notice of tho wife of the illu.-lri-ous
philosopher, Dugald Ntejvart. Nho is there
said to have been equal to her husband in intellect.
She was wholly fiee from pedantry, and the world
was not made acquainted with her deep acquis!
tions by any display of them which she made.
" On her husband," says the Review, she doted with
a love-match devotion ; to his studies and midnight
lucubrations she sieiilied her hoilth and re-t; she
was his amanuensis and corre. tor."
When a young lady she wrote a poem which
was accident!)' shown by her cousin, Lord Lothian,
to Mr. Stewart. The philosopher was o enrap
tured with tho perusal as to determine seeking her
hand in marriage. The society of Mrs. Stewart is
raid t i have attracted to her house the mast cultiva
ted citizens of Kdinburgh, and the di inguished
strangers who visi cd that city. Jlcr family name
was Cranstoun.
A PiTS.vr has recently been taken out for a ma
chine witich is bkely to supersede tho hilherti
known method of raising water. It is termed
Hull's Patent llydiauhc Uelt, and is already in op
eration in many pans of the country for the pur
pose of draining laud. The contrivance is the most
stinp'e, being im rely composed if a woollen bill
which is made to icvolvo round two rolleis, one
keeping ihc belt beneath tho water, and the other
fixed at any required altitude. The udhision of
lite water to the wolleu bill overcomes the 8"v''
of that element, when a velocity of 1000 lVet per
minute is acquired, a cou inuous stream is brought
up und poured in tho receiving pipe .J- Hull.
A Ki MAUKintK liLiCKsMl lii. Mr. Durrett,
the le rued blacksmith, recently delivered a Uttu e
bifuro the Lyceum ul Xurihampton, ( Mas.s. )
"which," says the Couiier, "for li erary beauty and
pi rforui.inci', astonished all w ho heurd him." Mr.
Uuriett is about 'J'i years uf ago, and sti I continues
his manual labor, and pursue bis studies. He is
aluady mister of mote thin fifty diiTeient lans'u-
(PS,
TRICKS r inVljltTISIXG.
I scpisre I insertion, . fr) .',(1
1 do do . ( 7;l
1 du dj t 00
Kvery ubieitcnt Inferti. n, 0 5"i
Yearly Advertisement, (wilh the privilege ol
alteration) one column f 25 J half column, flH,
three aqunri'D, $ 18? two square, y J one squne,
$5. Without the privilege of altciation libeial
dif count will be niiide.
Adveitisements left without direction as to the
length of time the are to bo published, will be
continued until ordered out, and charged accord
ing v.
Cf Nixtoon lines make t square.
Sir Urorgc t j ley's Air Engine.
Many attempts have been made in England and
Franc, and in thi country to convert air Into
motivo power, and according to tho l'ulytechnie
Journal, Sir (Jeorge Catey has at lenilh succeed
ed, and a locomotive carriage is now nearly finish
ed In London, which willhn propelled en thi prin
cqile. Air is the motive power of tht3 new engine.
The princ'p'e is easily explained. Air is comprs
sod bv the pump into a r ccber, to bo used when
wa ited. Motion i communicated to tho wheels
by pistons acted upon by the air, which is rarified
by heat in its passage from the receiver to the cyl
endrrs, where it acta upon the piston rod much in
the same way that the steam docs. -Thus, to com
municate motion to a pi.ton, a portion of tho air in
the receiver is forcrd by comprcssio'n into tube sub
jected to heat, and fnm thence, in it rarified state,
it rushes to the cylinders as the only place of escape.
Motion is accordingly produced. So Water is re
qu.ied a serious consideration, and the consump
tion of coke is only from four to five pounds
weight per horse power a mile. The air-engine, by
obvijting the necessi y of carrying water, and by
obtaining the full power from combustion In tho
most economical manner, bids fair t bo applicabla
ou ninny occasions where iho steam-engine is in
convenient, and to vie with il in power.
Lnxy People.
Liizincss is the parent of all sins that have been co
milted rince thu morning of creation. Eve was in
a buy fit at the timo Sjtrn tempted her; if Adam
had kept her busy she wju!i1 hava kept out of mis
chief, and we should all have been innocent and a
happy as lambkin. If the antediluvian had com
menced building niks when Noah preached to them,
th-y might have been saved, but they were loo la
r.v to work, arid so they were d'owncd in tho great
aqueous catastrophe. The reason the Egyptians
refused to let the I inc ites go, was because they
were too hry to make their ow n bricks, and wished
to compel the Hebrew to do lhe:r work for then.
The consequences a'e all well known ; they were
phgucd giievously, and afici wards drowned in the
red sea. Lazy people in our days are constantly
plaguing themselves, and are an everlasting plaguo
and eye-sore to others. The sight of a creeping, life
less indolent min or woman, is misery to the thrifty
and industrious. People of this class are friendless,
they are abhorred hy their own relations, and univer
sally dread, d. They not only hate to work them
selves, but they hite to pee work d "
... ,uu.o won J as useless and inactive as they
are. Of this kind aie your 1 "ungers, who delig'it
in hanging about wotk shops and printing offices,
and every place where they can interrupt business.
Had we, as Homer expressed it,
"A hundred mouth", a thousand tongues."
A throat of brass and adamantine lungs."
wc could sca coly find lime and strength to exe
crate such ciiaructtrs,
A gootl Joke.
I have heard a fust-rate joke about John Tur
mm, late of Athens. He was stopping at a tavern
up the country, and used to lounge about the bar,
and come it oer other people's liquor. Sol a glass
could be left for a moment but he would slily slip
up and drink its contents. One day a stage driver
ia:ne in and called foi a stilF liorn of brandy toddy.
John immediately (huPiled up to the bar. The dri
ver knew his nun, and immediately played passuia
by leaving his brandy while he stepped to the Coot,
The bail took on retun.iiij,' he saw the glass empty
and exclaimed with ul 1 the diabolical horror he
should cfl'cct
'Uiandy and opium enough ta kill forty men!
who drank that poisou !"
I " staminuied John, teady to give up the ghost
wilh affright.
"You're a dead man," 6aid the driver.
"What shall I dot' bc.ccchcd John, who
thought himself a gone sucker.
"Down with a pint of lamp oil, or you aie a dcaJ
man in three minutes," answered the wicked dri
ver. And dow n went the lamp oil, up came the bran
dy and opium, together with John's breakfast. The
joke was told, and he has uevor drank other pco
ple.s liquor since. ii ilton.
The follow i ig is related iit the February dum
ber of the Kuickeibockcr ;
Dr. Aspen's episode of tooth drawing, reminds
m of a countiy patient somewhat akin t his, who
called on one of our most eminent dentists, being
troubled with a raging tooth,' which ho wi.hed ex
traded. Siting himself, the pohUed steel was
displayed before his ejes, and tho noit instant tho
tormentor was placed in his hanj. 'Well doctor,'
said be, 'how much do ou ax f.u the job? Guy
but you did il quick though V 'My terms,' replied
thu di iitist, 'are one dollar.' '.4 JhL'ar .' for half
a minute work.' One Dollar.'.'?? Tucn
pi.b ! Why, a doctor down't to our place, dtawe l
a tooth for me two year go, and it look him ttuo
huurs He dragged me ull around tho ronu, and
lost Ins giip half a doten limes. I never see such
hard woik; and he only charged me twenty live
cent. A dollar I t a minute's w ark ! O gitib ul !
you utusl be jokiu!' This economical victim
was about following oi t the popular utilitarian doc
trine, that the labor necessary to pioducs tesult,
should form its standard of value."
Mtuausa A Western editor heJ his marri-
nnticc .'. fifth' ring.