Raftsman's journal. (Clearfield, Pa.) 1854-1948, November 26, 1856, Image 1

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VOL. 3.-NO. 15:
CLEARFIELD, "WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 26, 1856.
m s. b. now.
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' '' 3
A PRETTY LYRIC.
We'll part do more, oh, never !
Let glpJness deck thy brow ;
Oar hearts are joined forever,
Ey each religious vow.
Misfortune's clouds have vanished,
That caused our bosom's pain ;
.And ever; care is banished,
Ho more to come again.
Hope's star ia brightly burning
Within its brilliant dome,
And tells of joy returning
To cheer our rural homo.
It shines through gloom to gladden.
Dispelling grief and care ;
For sorrow ne er can sadden,
AVhilo it remaiueth there.
'Mid flowery vales we'll wander,
And by the laughing stream,
Our bosoms growing fonder
'Neath Love's enchanting beam.
In yonder cot reposing
In plenty, side by side,
ach morn fresh joys disclosing.
Through life we'll gently glide.
PARADISE LOST.
Mr knansack wns on my shoulder. So said
Armand, a young artist, when a little corupa
ry of us were sitting together the other even
ing.
My knap,ack was on my shoulder, my ashen
stick in my hand ; three leagues of dusty road
W whitened me like a miller. henco
came, whither I was going what matters it ?
I was not twenty years of age. My starting
place, therefore, was home ; my goal was Par
adise any earthly Faradiso I could find. The
country was not particularly picturesque, and
the weather was very hot. Great undulations
of harvest laden fields rolled irregularly on all
Bides. Here was a hamlet, there a solitary
farm house, yonder a wood, on each eminence
a wind-mill. Some peasants that were in the
field sang, and the birds chirped at them as if
in mockery. One or two wagons, dragged by
oxen and horses, slowly moved along the tree
bordered road. I sat down on a heap of stones.
A wagoner gruffly asked me if I was tired, and
offered me "a lift." I accepted ; and soon I
was stretched where dung had been jolted in
to an uneasy half slumber, not without its
charms, with the bells of the lazy team softly
jingling in my ears, until I thought silver voi
' ' fr'linjT T1" U a" Knmo t hnt must
I awoke tn &.f'-9nnK'xx5"i.vjii,J re
ceive aa apology. The man had forgotten me
whn he turned off the high road, and taken
me half a league into the country. "Where
was the harm, honest wagoner ? . I am not go
ing anywhere ; "I am only going to Paradise."
There was no village of that name in the neigh
borhood, he said ; but he had no doubt I would
be pleased to see the grounds of the chateau
Of course I had come on purpose for that.
handed him hispoar-iorfe. "Drink my health,
good man, and injure your own. Let us see
these crounds." The man showed me through
a meadow near the farm (to which he Iclon
ed) and left me, tof sing the silver piece I had
given him in his hand. I soon observed that
the place was worth seeing'.
A hasty glance showed it to be a fragment
of wild nature, occupied in its original state,
and barricaded against civilization. There
were woods and solitary trees ; and lakes, and
streams of sufficient grandeur; and,whcn once
the wall disappeared amidst the heavy foliage,
I could at first discern, no traees whatever of
the presence of man. However, on closer ex
amination, I discovered that nature had been
improved upon ; that all subjects which might
ungraciously iutercept the view, or deform a
landscape, had been removed. There was no
sham ruins nor artificial cascades; but the
strangers steps were led, by some ingenious
process of plantation, insensibly Jo the best
points of view. I felt, and was thankful, for
the presence of the art which so industriously
endeavored to conceal itself; but being at that
time, as most young men arc, inclined to com
pare great things with small thinking to be
epigrammatic and knowing I exclaimed a
loud, "The toilet of this park has been admi
rably performed."
"A vulgar idea, vulgarly expressed," said a
clear, firm voice above mo.
I looked up, thinking that somebody was
hidden in a tree, and to my sui prise, saw a
young woman upon a fine large horse, holding
a ridiug-whip playfully over my head. She
had approaohed across the turf unheard, and
heard my exclamation, which, I assure you,
was meant for no ears but my own.
"Madfen," replied I, when I had recovered
from my confusion, "I think you misunder-
tfand me. There is no vulgarity in compar
ing a prospect in which every superfluity is
thus tastefully pruned away, to a woman, who,
instead of loading herself withc-rnaments,
scs the arts of the toilet to display all her
beauties to the best advantage."
The explanation will not do," she replied ;
it wanti frankness. Your phrase simply
meant that you were ashamed of the admira
tion this view had at first excited ; and that
jou thought it necessary to exert tho manly
privilege of contempt. If I had not seen you
.yonder using your sketch-book, I should take
you for a travelling hair-dresser."
The tone and manner of my acquaintance
puzzled me exceedingly; and I wrs at first
rather irritated by the hostile attitudo she as
sumed on 6uch slight sounds. It was evident
she wished to provoke an intellectual contest ;
for, at the moment, I did not understand that
her real desire was to suppress the formalities
of aa intBductiou. I returned to the charge ;
she replied. A broadside of repartee was fir- ,
ed off on either side ; but insensibly we met I
- i
upon common ground ; affectation was discar
ded ; and, as we streamed irregularly along
the swardy avenues, or stopped at the entranco
of a long vista she gently walking her docile
genet, I with my hand upon its mane we made
more advances towards familiarity and friend
ship in an hour than would have been possible
under any other circumstances in a season.
Let me describe ray impressions as I receiv
ed them ; otherwise, how will the narrative il
lustrate tho theory 1 I am endeavoring to
show, by example, what an immense structure
of happiness may be built upon very flimsy
ground ; that the material sequences of this
life's events need have no correspondence with
the sequence of our sentiments ; that but I
must not anticipate.
The lady, dressed in a silk riding-habit, was
remarkably handsome, as this miniature will
show.
And Armand drew a small case from his
breast.
"It is made from memory ; but I will an
swer lor its exactitude."
"Wo all know the face well enough, my
friend," quoth Prevost ; "it reappears in near
ly all your pictures, like Raphael's Fornarina.
Last year you made it do duty for Medea ; this
year, modified to suit the occasion, it will ap
pear in the salon as Charlotte Corday. Why
have you so carefully avoided that type in your
Juliet and vour Heloise ? One would imagine
that instead of being associated with pleasant
recollections, it suggested nothing but strife,
violence and despair."
"Were that the case, you know," quoth Ar
mand, with feigned sprightliness, "my theory
falls to the ground ; and in telling you my sto
ry, I am only impertinently taking advantage
of your good nature to mako concession, and
thus ease a somewhat troubled mind. Listen
to the end. It is not far off."
We reached a grotto on the border of a lit
. ,m;.n on
, ,, . ti,.. .nt.
-
placed ready ; and Fifinc, the maid, was there them of murder, notwithstanding the manufac- Congress that no man, in any of the Territo
L W nnrtook of the meal together- turcd testimony and the strong outside pros- rics of the United States, shall be allowed to
luinKiug ui uuiuiog Bisc.-unco or twice a re-
flection on the oddity of this receptiou flitted
across my mind ; but I thought I had fallen in
with some eccentric mistress of the castle
such as one reads of in the middle-age roman-
ces -who was proud to give hospitality to a
wanting artist. The lady called mo Hector, j that sickening prison, and had enjoyed an it over from tho summit of the Rocky Moun
and I called lice Andromache ; and, under the I hour of liberty such as it is iu Kansas are I tains to tho summit of the Sierra Nevada, we
influence of some generous wine that came in
the dessert, I went so far as to declare that my
love for her was unbounded, and that she must
bo my bride. I was thrown into ecstacies of
delight by the frank reply, that it only depen
ded upon me to fix tho day ! What follies I
committed I scarcely recollect ; but I know
that Fifine scolded me, and said that, for a
well-educated man I was dreadfully forward.
What a delightful hall hour was that which
succeeded ! Tho entranco of the grotto was
wreathed with vines. The ripples of the lake
broke upon a little beach of sand that seemed
of gold dust ; the path by which we had come
alorg ran at the foot of a precipice for about
thirty yards, and then climbed a steep bank ;
the expanse of water possibly it was merely
a large pool, but these things magnify in mem
ory nestled at the feet of some lofty wooded
slopes. We sat side by side, hand in hand ;
but Fifine, whosa notions of propriety were-
extremely rigid, expostulated vehemently. I
whispered that she ought to be sent away ; and
Andromache was, perhaps, of my opinion, but
she did not venture to agree with me aloud.
Thus tho hour passed in silent happiness for
our hearts soon became too full for words ; and
I solemnly declare that, to spend such a
nother day, I would discount ten years of my
existence.
As evening drew nerr, and I began to dream
of tho delights of a twilight stroll along the
margin of the lake, Fifine pitilessly suggested
an adjournment to tho chateau. The. word
grated harshly on my ear, I had almost pictur
ed to myself the laiy as a drj'ad, or a nymph
living ever amidst the trees and grottos. But
prosy Fifine carried her point; and in half an
hour we were in the saloon of a most comfor
table modern dwelling, furnished with Parisian
elegance. Scvcral'vcry common place-look
ing servants stared at me as I entered. My ro-
mantic ideas at once received a shock. Five
minutes afterwards a post-chaise rolled up to
the door, and a stout old gentleman, accompa
nied by a tall, handsome young man, issued
therefrom.
Why should I give yon tho ludicrous details
of the explanation 1 Andromache was betroth
ed to Monseur Hector Chose ; but she had ne
ver seen him. Her father, a wealthy natural
ist, had gone that day to meet the bridegroom
at a neighboring town. The young lady, who
was of a romantic disposition, had descried
me in the park, and fancied this was a pre-ar
ranged surprise. Sho had got up the break
fast in the grotto ; and had made my acquain
tance as I have related. I answered to" the
name of Hector ; sho naturally retorted An
dromache. This was the whole explanation of
the mistake. I was overwhelmed with shame
when the father and the real Hector, with vo-
riforous lauebter , undeceived me ; and tho
young lady herself went away in tears of vex-
ation. For a moment I nopea tnai i iraa pro-
duced an ineffaceable impression ; butl wa
soon undeceived. In my mortification l nau
...
insulted Hector. A hostile meeting was the
result. I received a severe wound, and lay
long time helpless in a neighboring hamlet.
Still my love was not cured. Even when I
heard that the marriage was celeb.ated, I per
sisted in looking upon the bride as my An-
dromache; but when Madame Duelique, her
cousin, came to see me, she destroyed all my
illusions. Andromache, she said, though with
much affectation of romance, was a very mat
ter-of-fact personage, and remembered our
love-passage only as a ridiculous mistake.
She had married Hector, not only without re
pugnance, but with delight, lie brought her
everything she desired a handsome person, a
fine fortune, an exalted position : and she was
the first to joke on the subject of "that poor
counterfeit Hector."
This interview cured me at once. I discov
ered that I was strong enough to leave the
Paradise I had lost. Madam Duelique, an a-
miable and beautiful person, gave me a scat in
her carriage, and drove me to tho town of Ar-
I ieel grateful to my Andromache for
ques.
having impressed upon my mind an enduring
form of beauty. "Let us drink her health."
KANSAS.
Lawrence, K. T., Nov. 8th. The news
here at present is very scarce. Except the
anxiety entertained by the whole people of the
Territory, .is to the result of the murder trials,
nothing of general interest is taking place.
On Monday last fifteen men were acquitted
who had been on trial for murder, because
they verc found with arms in their hands, a
right which is sacredly guaranteed to them by
the Constitution, and which is, therefore, a
right sacred to American citizenship. These
fifteen men are a part of the hundred and odd
who were arrested by the United States troops
by order of Geary. Not being able to con
vict them even before a ProSlavery jury, some
of the jurors, notorious as having taken part in
I...... ... ... i
tue late struggles, not DC ins: aDie to convict
J ones, ana" others of the i'ro'-'siaVe'fy'''icTdcr,
impartial (?) oflicers of the ill-fated Territory
I have recourse to another judicial expedient.
Seven of the fifteen just relessed have been re-
arrested for robbing the Franklin Post Office !
These men who had first been released from
once more thrown into it, there to remain, per-
haps, until the April term of court. Tho pris-
ouers are still hopLful and in better health
than usual. They nave been ably defended bv
Messrs. Parrott and Stevens. Mr. Bassett, of
Lawronce, has been indefatigable in bis atten-
tion to their wants, visiting tbetn nearly every
day. Others have visited them when
they
could.
Tnrj Flaxet J cpiter. Jupiter is now the
evening star, and will continue so until April
11, 1S37. Jupiter is the largest of all tho
planets, and, next to Venus, the most brilliant.
It is one thousand three hundred times larger
than the earth, is about four hnndrcd and nine-ty-f'o'e
million eight hundred thousand miles
distant from th sun, and is accompanied by
four moons, which help it to its light. It is
twelve years in revolving around the sun, and
turns about on its axis once in ten hours,vhich
gives it a velocity at Its equator of four thou
sand six hundred and fifty-eight miles in a
minute, or a speed of two thousand times
greater than that of a cannon-ball. Its axis
being nearly perpendicular to the plane of its
orbit, the sun is almost always in tho plane of
its equator. .
A Good Oxe. There is a
distinguished
Democratic politician in Mississippi, says the
Memphis Empire, remarkable for the reckless-
ncss of his assertions on the stump, who is not
unfrequently called "The Well-Digger." The
other day, so it is reported, an old man, a Ten-
soeari, was introduced to him directly after
one of his speeches in the State, who remrrk-
ed : "Well, Governor, I think you are the
man who is sometimes called tho "Well Dig
ger ?" ' '
"Yes," said the Governor, ! believe they
do sometimes call me that ; but the truth is I
never dug a well in my life."
"I thought so," said the countryman.
"They say 'Truth lies at the bottom of a well,'
and from your speech to-day, I should judge
that you never had been there."
A letter writer in Australia speaks of a
huge eel which is sometimes met with in the
lakes or rivers in the interior of that wonder
ful country. His first introduction, to them
was somewhat original and piquant, ne had
been swimming near the shore in a beautiful
and secluded bay, and feeling fatigued, seated
himself on a log nearly as large as his body,
which seemed to be resting on tho pebbly bot
tom. Suddenly the log slipped from under
him and moved gracefully away ! It proved
to be an eel fifteen feet in length, but fortu-
nately not of the man eating species.
a m Mn.i,mJo'f'onr acnuaintanco says
that he is the last man in the world that wil
ever tvranize over a daughter's affections. So
I i0ng as she marries the man of his choice, he
i don't ctre wno rne tores.
MORMON VIEW OF TOLIT1CS.
. Annexed we give a few extracts from a ser
mon preached by Brigham Young, Governor
of Utah and leader of tho Mormons, at Great
Salt Lake City, on the 31st August, in which
ho holds that Congress has no right to legislate
upon, or interfere with the institution of po
lygamy, and that the people ot Utah are the
Proper persons to decide whether they will
have polygamy or not. That is good "popular
sovereignty" doctrine. But we wiLl give
Young's own characteristic language. He thus
discusses the subject : ...
"The different political parties are in oppo
sition. Can the various parties be reconciled 1
No. Each party wishes to elect a President
of the United States. We design to elect Je
sus Christ for our President, and tho wicked
wish to elect Lucifer, ths Son of the Morning,
and swear that ihey will have him ; and we
declare that we will serve Jesus Christ, and he
shall be our President. We calculate that we
are right, and we are going to vote for tho
sovereign we believe in ; and when he comes,
behold he will go into tho chair of stato and
take tho reins of Government. They may kill
tho bodies wo have, they may strive to injure
us, but when the day of tho great election
comes, as the Lord Almighty lives, we shall
gain our President, and we auticipate holdirtg
office under bim. Do you blame the wicked
lor being mad 1 No. They desire to rule, to
hold tho reins of government on this earth;
they have held them a great while. I do not
blame them for being suspicious of me ; men
in high standing are suspicious of us, hence
the frequent cry, "treason, treason, we are go
ing to have trouble with the peoplo in Utali'
What is the matter 1 Wherein can they point
out one particle of injury that we have done
to them ? True, we have more wives than
one, and what of that? They have their
scores of thousands of prostitutes; wo have
none. But polvgamy they are unconstitution
ally striving to prevent; when they will ac
complish their object is not for me to say.
1 m i i ..-rto.At.w1 n fAcnlfiTinn in
I j.ueynae UJ -
fine. How will they get rid of this awful evil
in Utah ? They will have to expend about
$300,000,000 for building a prison; for we
must all go into prison. And after they have
expended that amount for a prison, and roofed
will dig out and go preaching through tho
world. Yoico on the stand : What will be-
come of the women ; will they go to prison
with us ?1 Brother Heber seems concerned a-
1 bout the women going with us ; they will be
I with us, for we shall be here together. This
I is a little amusiug.
"Br. Robbins, in bis remarks, said that the
Constitution of the United States forbids ma
king ex post facto laws. The presenting of
the resolution alluded to shows their feelings ;
they wish the Constitution out of existence,
ami thero"is no question but that they will get
rid of it as quickly is they can, and that would
be ex post facto law, which tho Constitution of
the United States strictly forbids. . .
"It is not the prerogative of tho President
of the United States to meddle with this mat
ter, and Congress is not allowed, according to
the Constitution, to legislate upon it. If Utah
was admitted into the Union as a sovereign
State and we chose to introduce Slavery here,
it is not their business to meddle with it ; and
even if wo treated our slaves in an oppressive
manner, it is still none of their business and
they ought not to meddle with it. If we in
troduce the practice of polygamy, it is not
their prerogative ta meddle with it ; if we
ihould all turn to bo Roman Catholics to-day,
if we all turn to the old Mother Church, it
would not be their prerogative, it would not be
their business, to meddle with us on that ac-
coffnt. If we are Mormons or Methodists, or
worship the sun or a white dog, or if we wor-
ship a dumb idol, or all turn Shaking Quakers
and have no wife, it is not their prerogative to
meddle with these affairs, for in so doing they
would violate the Constitution.
'There is not a Territory in the Union that
is looked upon with so suspicious an eye as is
Utah, and yet it is the only part of the nation
that cares anything about the Constitution.
" Mormonism' is true, and all h-11 cannot
overthrow it. All tho devil's servants on the
earth may do al they can, and as Br. Clinton
has just said, after twenty-six years faithful
operation and exertion by our enemies, inclu
ding the times when Joseph had scarcely a
man to stand by him, and when the persecu
tion was as severe on him as ever it was in the
world, what have they accomplished ? They
have succeeded in making us an organized
Territory, and they are determined to make
ns an independent State or Government, and
as the Lord lives it will bo so. The congre
gation shouted amen. I say, as the Lerd
lives, we are bound to become a sovereign
State in the Union, or an independent Dation
b onrselvcs, and let them drive us from this
pace if th can tn not do it j do not
throw thi " a banter ; you gentiles, and
"CK0r7 oasswooa 'Mormons can write u
-WQ J Pase, Dut write as i spean
it.
These extracts Till suffice to give th reader
a correct idea or the wuoie sermon.
bout the time this sermon was delivered, the
women became obstreperous, and caused him
. . . 4
much trouble. Their "whining," as ho terms
it, continuing, ho preached a sermon about it,
on the 21st Sept., in which he says to them :
"I ani eoine to give you from this time to
the 6th day of October next for reflection, that
you may determine whether you wish to stay
with your husbands or no ; and then I am go
ing to set every woman at liberty, and say to
them, 'Now, go your way my women with the
rest ; go your way.' And my wives have got
to do$ne of two things : csther round up their
shoulders to endure tho alllictions ot tins
world an live for their religion, or they may
leave, for I will not have them about me. I
will go into heaven alone rather than have
scratching and fighting around me. I will set
all at liberty." . . "I wish my women, and
brother Kimball's, and brother Grant a to
leave, and every woman Jn this Territory, or
else say in their hearts that they will embrace
tho Gospel tho whole of it."
In addition to tho privilege of taking as
many wives as they please, Brigham proposes
to also confer upon the saints the privilege of
repudiating their wives at pleasure. Brsgham
is "a broth of a boy," without mistake.
A Yocsa Lady Dhawn is a Loiteht.-
Nearly a year ago, a young lady in France,
named Sophie Van Eehr, conceived a singular
idea of disposing of herself in marriage l-y
means of a lottery. She was thirty years old,
tired of a life of celibacy, and in despair at not
fiirtling a husband with enough means at his
command to suit her views. She aunounccd,
therefore that her handsome but rather mature
person should be disposed of on the following
terms. She created a lottery, with Qve hun
1rid slinrps of a thousand francs each. Sub
scribers were to present themselves in person
in order that she might decide on their accep
tability as husband. The subscribers, of course
were to be single men. The subscriptions
were placed in the hands of a notary as fast as
made, and the drawing was not to take place
till all the shares were taken that is, when
the sum of half a million francs was complete
. .1 1 .. . J m . . - A t. f il.. Villi
were all taken. The drawing recently took
place in the office of the notary, who held the
subscriptions and the money, in presence of
two magistrates. A thousand numbers were
placed in an urn, the subscribers being nnm
bered in order as their names were inscribed
The urn was thoroughly shaken up, a blind
hand thrust in and No. 499 withdrawn. The
happy individual who subscribed No. 499 was
a Tunisian General, who had already occupied
the public attention by his oriental caprices
But the lady was neither frightened a the tur
ban, nor the beard, nor the religion, nor the
harem of the happy barbarian, who hastened
to marry her, and to pocket his five hundred
thousand francs. Tho happy couple have left
for Tunis, where they will reside. Part'j Cor.
A". 3. Times.
Two Women Eaten ct Wolves. The Dum
fries, Canada West;' Reformer, says : "Some
ten days ago, in the uorthcrly extremity of the
township of Monington, two females went out
in the cvening in search of their cows, and
not returning that night, search was made in
the morning, when their skeletons were only
to be found, their flesh having been devoured
by the wolves. Wo are yet unable to record
the particulars the sad outlines only having
as yet reached us. Our informant also states
that a man in that locality has been missing
for the last ten days. No traces of him can
be found whatever, and fears are entertained
that ho has met the same lamentable fate as
the unfortunate women." The wolves are rep
resented as being so numerous and ravenous,
as to render it unsafe to be alone on the public
highways after night. Bears are also numer
ous and remarkably saucy, and several have
recently been killed.
Hon. Kenneth Ratnee. It is stated that a
personal difficulty occurred, on the 17th, in
the streets of Raleigh, North Carolina, be
tween Hon. Kenneth Rayner and Mr. Holden,
editor of the Standard, growing out of Mr.
Rayner's speech in Philadelphia, preceding
the Presidential election, and the strictures of
the editor named thereupon. Mr. Rayner in
flicted several blows upon his adversary with
a cane, when they were separated and bound
over in $4000 each to keep the peace.
Kegclar Barxbcexersj The Troy Times
mentions a practical "Irish bull" which was tc
ccntly perpetrated in Saratoga county, N. Y.,
with rather serious consequences. Some of
tho Irish voters, elated with the Buchanan vic
tory, resolved to burn a tar barrel in honor
thereof. For this purpose they kindled it on
a bridge, which was of course destroyed.
The St. Louis Daily Leader, the organ of
tho Catholic and pro-slavery parties in pt.
Louis, expresses the opinion that the abolition
of slavery'in the Eastern and Northern States
was a "grave, social, and political error.'
What other opinion could be expected from
such a souice 1 "
When hor?es march in company those in
front direct their ears forward, those in tho
rear direct them backward, and those in the
centre turn them laterally or across ; the whole
troop seeming thus to be actuated by one feel
ing, which watchet the genend aafetr.
BILL TB0T AND HIS TAKKEE CLOCK.-.
Well, sir,' Bill said to me one day, about
five years or better, ago, I bought a wooden
day clock from a Yankee pedlar, named Tom
Jones, who used to travel through this coun
try, droppin' one at most every house. . 'Twas
the last one he had, and I give him fifteen dol
lars for it. She was a perfect goer of a clock
and then sich a beauty! Her little squatty,"
dumpy figur' dressed out ia her painted case,
jist filled my eye exactly, to a gnat's heel. I
sot her on the mantle shelf, so as I might allers
see her. I . didn't think I'd ever git tired
lookin' at her. Her little penjluin would
swing back'ards and forreds, pickin off the-
seckinsata proper rate. Thar she'd roll it,"
peckiu' away, day arter day, and week arter
week, dead bent on keepin, up with the sua
and dcterm'ed that nary time-piece in the set
tlement should git ahead of her. She'd dig
ahead at the hours, never sfoppin' to ketch
breath, but firin' away in admirable style. I'd
wind her up of nights, and then go to bed,
puttin' every confidence in her, and bein' per
fectly satisfied that she'd do her duty faithful,
although I wasn't watchin' of her and wouldn't
allow the sun to be up before she put her hand
to the hour for sunrise. And then, 6irj when
I'd be restless, and couldn't sleep, or when I
was sick, then what company she was to me.
To be shurc she couldn't talk to me jist cal
led my name that's all. Though some times,
she'd say Dick' so plain, I'd look np at her
and almost expeck her to lead off a regular
built chat. Well, sir, she continued to be
good for five years, and was my heart's delight.
In fack, I may say she hilt on to be good lon
ger than that ; but it was about that time shs
begun monstrously to rezemblo old Dave Wil
son's wife you know who she was V
Cannot say I do, exactly.'
Why, sir, I thort you knowed Old Davis
used to say that his wife was a charming crcc
tur one of the best of women that he did
not believe, from old Mother Eve down to tho
present gineration, a - better . woman ever
throwed a petticoat over her head. To bo
shure, he sed she had her ways here Bill snuf
fled ia imitation of old Dave, whom I knew
very well, she would have her ways, and siclx
ways as she did have. Well, sir, my clock got
to be the same way some of ' her works got
outer fix, and for spite she done jist as she
blamed please. Strike! yes, sir, she did like
all dingnation ! She'd take a notion to bugle
off sometimes, and she'd ring iu on theci wires
one hundred au fifty times. . At first I was tick
led at it, and would set and laugh at her for
bein' sich a fool as to be cutting up them ex
trays what didn't hurt anybody but herself.
But at last I began to git tired of sich foolery.
It 6ecnied to me, whenever I had a tough job
before me, and wanted to study it out, or
whenever I was right sleepy, then she'd pick
her chance to come theui big licks ! I put up
with it a long time didn't do nothing to her
and thort, by letting her have her fun out,
she might git tired of it herself, after a while.
But she didn't ; she still hilt on stouter 'an
ever. On last Sunday I west up above here to
muster, and, as I allers docs on sich occasions,
tuck rather too much of the tctch me lightly.
When I got home, I thort the best place for
me w as in bed so as to sleep off my boozy, I
pulls off, and gits in bed ; but no sooner did
my head tetch the piilcr, than up starts the
clock ch-r-r-ring ch-r-r-ring 1 determined
to put a stop to sich capers that night. I got
up, loaded my old musket, tuck a cheer, and
sot down right before her. Now, old lady,
sez I, yer arter the spite game agin are ye ?
Jist go on ef you liko it but dar' to strike a
hundred this time, and, dang me ef you don't
ketch h 11 !' My threats didn't scare her one
bit she stiuck away, Reared like livelier than
ever. She went it so peart, she soon got np to
ninety ninety-one two three four five
six I see yer gwyin' St,' sez I, and I cocks
the old musket, ch-r-r ring I puts it to my
shoulder ch-r-r-ring I takes sight ch-r-rring
I lays my finger on the trigger ch-r-rring,
sez hhe, stouter an ever, and was start in
with another chec when I lums away, and in
half a seckin' finds myself flat on my back, in
the middle of the flour. As I picked myself
up, I heard the old lady still goin' it; and
dern toe, ef she didn't strike fifty times more,
although twenty-five buckshot had tcck effect
all among her countenance,and both her hands
were taken smooth off. I haint wound her np
since ; for w ith the pluck she's got, ther'a no
knowing what she might do, if she had tho
chance. She's without exception, the best
game I ever seed.' . . . " - '
Moral. Although it may be well to tako
Time by the fore-lock, yet it would be better
not to do so rashly.
A Buccaneer on the Bible. I. N. Norris,
a candidate for Congress, in a 6peech at Quin
cy, HI., on Saturday previous to the election,
said "If w o beat the black Republicans on
Tuesday, they will cease to exist, ayo be swal
lowed up in the political whirlpool as the cfiil
dren of Israel were in the Red Sea." Yes ; that's
just the way they will be swallowed up. 7 :
Yiciors To persist in kissing st pfcttf,
bright.eyed girl, when she rasolutely declares
she wishes you not to. It looks as thongh'you
wouldn't take her word.
A man tried the other day to ptmihhja a bk
that vtmld lay a brick. .
I