10
HARRISBURG TELEGRAPH
A VSWSPAPBH FOR THS HOUR
Pounded it fl
Published evening? except Sunday by
THE TELEGRAPH PRINTING CO.,
Telegraph Building, Federal Square.
JS. J. STACK POLE, Pros'i 6r Eaitor-m-Chirf
F. R. OYSTER, Buiinoss Manager,
OUS M. STEINMI3TZ. Managing Editor.
Member of the Associated Press—The
Associated Press la exclusively en
title* to the use fqr republication of
all news dispatched credited to It or
not otherwise credited In this paper
and also the local news published
herein.
All rights of republication of special
dispatches herein are also reserved.
Member American
fn Newspaper Pub
llshera' Asso^la^
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Entered at the Post Office in Harris
burg, Pa., as second class matter.
By carriers, ten cents n
week; by mall, J5.00
a year In advance.
THURSDAY, JVLY 25, 1918
I beg you whatever 'be your suffer
ing, to learn first of all that God does
not mean to take your sorrow off,
but to put strength into you, that
you may be ble to carry it. Be sure
pour sorrow is not yielding you its
best, unless it makes you a more
thoughtful person than you have
ever been before. —PHILLIPS BROOKS.
PEACE FEELERS
GERMANY having put out an
other peace feeler, the ailies
will do well to ignore it com
pletely. This is no tima to taJk
peace. We are busy, too busy lick
ins the Huns to think about any
thing but unconditional surrender.
We have set our minds to war and
the best answer the allies could
give the Kaiser is Secretary Biker's
arnouncement that he means to
raise an American army of 5,000,000
men.
Germany would like to get out of
the war now in order to reorganize
and get ready for another great
slaughter, when she could take on
the nations one after another and
win the world for herself. The Ger
man peace terms are absurd on their
face. All the Prussian gang wants
is to get the nations around a peace
table to discuss fundamentals which
are not open to discussion so long
as the allies stand tirm in the field
on the platform so admirably laid
down by President Wilson.
The Wilson doctrine of peace is
the only one acceptable to America.
We have demonstrated that we can
beat the Hun at his own gams and
when we talk peace it will be to tell
Germany just what must be done.
The Kaiser's place at the peace table
will be between two American sol
diers armed with rifles, if he is dig
nified by any consideration what
soever.
The farmers of Central Pennsylva
nia are thousands of dollars richer
to-day because of last night's rain,
but the Reservoir golf crowd, which
nissed its supper, never thought about
that.
HIGHLY SUCCESSFUL
IT will be well to remember that
Postmaster Burleson has said
that the telegraph and telephone
systems of the country under
private ownership have been oper
ated in a "highly successful" man
ner. Sir. Burleson might have said
the same of the conduct of the postal
department before he took charge,
but he would make himself the
laughing stock of the country if he
said anything like that now. Heaven
help the public if he does no better
with the telephones and telegraphs
than he has done with the mailc.
He says he has in mind "improve
ments and economies." In the past
office department his "improvement"
hus meant, for example, that a spe
cial delivery package mailed in New i
York in the evening does not reach
Harrisburg until about thirty-six
hours later. Before he took charge
the same package was laid down on
the desk of the man addressed the
morning following the evening on
which it was mailed. The "improve
ment" in this case has been a delay
of twenty-four hours in delivery, and
the necessity of a complete chango
of mailing arrangements by the
business man in question. This is
only one case of many. Philadel
phia Is now so hard hit by blunders
of the Burleson administration that
the newspapers are engaged ta a
crusade for betterment
An "economy" of the Burleson
variety has been to cut down the
number of mail clerks and post
office employes at a time when busi
, ness has been growing rapidly and
their burdens consequently on the
increase. Then, too, he has seen
to it that in order to "save money"
the men of the postal department
have not received advances in wages
in anything like the proportion given
to men In private enterprise. In
short, he has succeeded by his non
sensical ideas ot "Improvements axut
IHURSDAY EVENING,
economies" In wrecking a depart
ment of the government that was
formerly the pride of the nation *nd
a model of efficiency.
This is no reflection upon the
working forces, who have been
forced to give up life-long occupa
tions in the service to go In large
numbers to other lines of endeavor
where their efforts are more appre
ciated or to continue to work under
almost intolerable conditions.
If the telegraph and the telephon
are to go the same way as the post
office department, we repeat. Heaven
save the public, and the nation, too,
which just now is so dependent
upon efficiency in all lines of busi
ness.
We pay fifteen cents for the old
time ten-cent ice cream soda and
laugh about It, but" how we do yell
when somebody suggests a six-cent
car fare.
STREET LIGHTING
THE Fuel Administration Is to be
commended for its effort to save
lighting current and gas—which
in the final analysis means coal. It
is a small matter for a merchant to
forego the lighting of his show win
dows if all his competitors are un
der the same restrictions. The
brilliantly-lighted hotel may also dim
its luster some>vhat without injury
to anybody. But Administrator
Hickok is wise in going slow In the
matter of street lighting.
The Fuel Administration made a
grievous error last winter with its
"coalless days," working needless
hardship on thousands, and it would ;
make another grave mistake if it
rushed pell-mell into the regulation
of street lighting. Doubtless, we may
find it possible to get along without
some of the present light, but the
highway and police departments
should be consulted before any
steps are taken in that direction.
The automobile driver must de
pend within the city limits largely
upon the street lamps to guide his
course. He is not permitted to use j
his heavy headlights. To deny him
the street light would be to endanger
brth pedestrians and the
of motor driven cars. But even
more serious is the fact that crime
flourishes most in poorly lighted dis
tricts. "Deeds of evil love the dark
ness" is an old and true saying.
Robbery unquestionably would in
crease with a serious reduction In
street lighting.
We can stand t{ie baseball ruling if
only they don't go and regulate bass
fishing.
A JUST PETITION
V •
IT is to be hoped President Wilson
will heed and grant the petition
of the Grand Lodge of Pennsyl
vania Colored Knights of Pythias,
praying that he address a special
message to the country on the im
portance of exercising self-restraint
and preserving public order during
the war crisis. The lodgemen re-1
ferred particularly to the mob law i
and lynching spirit which have j
flared up here and there making life j
unsafe for even the Innocent and j
law-abiding colored men who have
been the worst sufferers at the hands
of unreasonable, unreasoning mobs.
The colored men do not mean that
crime should be protected, far from
it. t But they do believe all men
should be protected in their rights
and that the guilt or innocence of j
the accused should be left entirely!
in the hands of a jury of his peers. '
This is eminently Just and fair and j
should have unqualified Presidential !
support.
History repeats itself at the second
battle of the Marne, which is doing
pretty well for one war.
AFTER THE WAR
EVERY fresh issue of the illus
trated journals presents pic
tures of girl and women work
ers in new ocupations. From railroad
shops to munition factories they are
taking places long monopolized by
men. They are responding nobly to
the emergency. They are proving
their worth, and doubtless will con
tinue to do so.
These new activities of women
have excited certain self-announced
industrial "experts" who are begin
ning to worry about the "readjust
ment period" to follow the war.
"What is to happen," they are ask
ing, "when the men return and find
their places filled by women?"
This is shooting wide of the mark.
Our problem will not be so much to
displace the women workers as to
find new places for the men, and that
ought not to be so very difficult if
proper steps are taken now in prepa
ration for the coming of peace.
We shall then find ourselves with
the greatest merchant marine in the
world and commanding vast markets
that have been starved for years and
hungry for our goods. Industrial and
civic development and construction
held back by years of war will be
ready to absorb vast quantities of the
things which we shall have to sell.
We shall have a productivity beyond
our former wildest dreams. There
should be work for men and women,
too. But not all women will want to
continue in the mills. With the dis
charge of our soldiers will come a
very epidemic of marriage and in
addition countless wives now work
ing for wages will go back t<f their
normal business of home-making.
But much hinges upon our prepa
rations for peace and there are few
Indications that the federal govern
ment is giving any more considera
tion to this than ft did toward pre
paring for war before we actually
got into it.
"The Germans rolled back the
Americans with awful slaughter," says
the HUB correspondent. Crazy with
UM
fotOUtU
By the Ex-Committeeman
P
Mayor John V. Kosek, of Wilkes-
Barre. has turned the tables in the
investigation of the police on Burns'
detectives and the Chamber of Com
merce by causing the arrest of, Al
len Olds Myers, chief of Burns'
staff, on a charge of criminal con
spiracy and by issuing a warrant for
the arrest of Stephen J. Donahue,
Burns operator, on a like charge.
Myers has been held under J3,o<>o
ball for his appearance at court, Les
lie Ryman and C. W. Laycock,
Chamber of Commerce men, qualify
ing as his surety.
This sensation came while Dona
hue was on the witness stand. He
testified that he was playing the part
of the "sucker" in the fake prize
fight the Burns men were promoting
to trap members of the police, Dona
hue admitted he was supposed to
have lost $4,000 in betting on the
fight. He admitted sending a letter
to Mayor Kosek in which he raid
that the promoters had trimmed
him and played him for a "sucker"
in" getting him to bet on the fight.
In his letter to the mayor, he stilt
ed that Adam Herbert, chief of de
tectives, and Patrick Nolan, police
clerk, knew all about the fight and
how he had been trimmed.
Under cross-exantinatlon he ad
mitted that the purpose of his cell
ing was to get an interview with
Kosek. According to the scheme,
the mayor was expected to have Al
len Olds Myers picked un by the
police for getting Donahue's monev.
Myers was to turn over $4,000 to
Kosek. who in turn was expected to
turn it over to Donahue for the pur
pose* of shutting him up and pre
venting an expose in the newspapers,
and also to permit Myers to get out
of town while the money was in the
possession of Kosek.
The plan of the Burns men, ac
cording to Donahue, was to raid Ko
sek's office, cause his arrest and
catch him with the money in his
possession. Donahue admittted the
scheme would not work, because
Kosek would have nothing to do with
them.
CAMPAIGNING BY MAIL
In Kansas, now that the wheat
harvest is about to be completed, and
the Liberty Bond drive and the Red
Cross drive are out of the way and
there is nothing else to do. the peo
ple are beginning to inquire as to
"who's running?"
Up to this time the campaign has
consisted very largely of letter writ
ing by the candidates, and in this
•plan, it is well known. Governor
Capper, who is running for the Unit
ed States Senate, has all the other
candidates "laid in the shade." It is
said that Governor Capper's mailing
list is the envy of all Kansas poli
ticians.
A good story Is told of how the
Governor's correspondence bureau
works: Frank Grimes Is one of
Charles F. Scott's campaign manag
ers. One evening recently Grimes
went up to the Central National bank
building in Topeka to visit "Harve"
Motter, secretary of the Henry Allen
committee. Motter was visiting with
an old friend, a Swede, from Centra!
Kansas. He Introduced him to
Grimes.
"Any politics out your way?"
Grimes asked.
"Ain't bane much yat," replied the
Swede.
"Any talk about United States
Senator?" Grimes persisted.
"Oh, little," was the reply.
"Who are you for?" Mr. Grimes
questioned.
"Oh, I guess I bane for Gov'nor
Capper.
"Anybody for Scott out that way?"
"Scott? Who bane Scott?" asked
Mr. Motter's friend.
"Why, he's a candidate for the
Senate," was the answer.
"I tank not," the Swede replied.
"I got letter from Gov'ner Capper
yesterday and he said nothing about
Scott bane candidate."—Kansas Citv
Star.
LEST WE FORGET
'Leno me your wings, oh, wind,"
That X may fly
Up through the boundless reaches
of the sky
And gather stars, to strew the graves
where lie
Our soldier dead, stilled in Death's
majesty
With new culled staF-dust.
"Lend me your song, oh, nightin
gales,"
That I may sing
Of daring deeds, and that the world
may ring
Of heroism, sacrifice, the widow's
wails,
And echo thrill the earth and
heaven through.
That man and all God's angels may
he true.
That "golden notes from out a sil
ver horn"
May sound my song of songs to na
tions yet unborn.
Lest they forget.
"Lend me your perfume, flower, leaf
and blade,"
That I may burn
A fitting, sweeter incense to these
dead
Than ever yet has burned or shed
its light
On honor's roll, that all may read
aright
The story of their deeds in man
kind's fight
For Liberty.
"Lend me your tints, oh, rainbow,"
For the flag—*•
Youi twin that floats so proudly o'er
the land
Where freedom and humanity go
hand in hand.
Where brother-love and honor, more
than gold.
And gentleness to weakness, ever
hold
Their place; lend me your tints, if
needs be. to renew
Our flag's proud message In its ev
ery hue.
And star and fold.
"Lend me your gift to hate. Ye
Furies' Clan,"
Lest I forget;
May God forgive the wish, all kind
ness ban.
Even in thought, eke action, and in
prayer.
This must be banished from the
creeds of man
Who have what we have to avenge
and bear.
Teach me to hate, forgiveness to
forswear.
Forever, ay! and then!
The time has come, has come, when
the Christ's cross
Must yield, its gentle message give
way to the sword;
When man must count love and for
giveness loss.
And by the wish to slay, alone be
stirred.
—William P. Hunter.
HARRISBTTRG TELEGRAPH
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I LETTERS TO THE EDITOR
LIFE AND DEATH
To the Editor of the Telegraph:
Birth is a mystery- Life is a mys
tery. Death is a, mystery. But the
mysteries belong to God. who never
majces a mistake, so we go on trust
ing in Thee, Lord Jesus, to make
the crooked paths straight. The
flesh is of the earth, but the spirit of
man is the candle of the Lord, shin
ing brighter and brighter with the
perfect day. C. S. M.
KEEP TROOPS MOVING
[Kansas City Star]
There should be no abatement In
the movement of troops to Europe.
The events of the last week have
shown what it means to the allies
to have enough men to take the of
fensive. It would be a very great
mistake for Secretary Baker to per
mit the movement to slacken.
With plenty of men it is possible,
to overwhelm the enemy with the
least loss to the attacking troops.
This was demonstrated in the Ger
man offensive in March when
Gough's array was cut to pieces. We
can turn the tables on the German
if we will.
That means that Congress must
make speedy provision for calling
additional troops by extending the
draft.ages. We cannot keep up the
present transportation rate without
providing for the training of more
men immediately.
The heavy troop movements of
April. May and June were made pos
sible by the use of some British ton
nage in addition to our own. As
stated in the House of Commons
something over 300,000 men, or ap
proximately half of the total number
transported in that period, were
moved in British ships. Assurance
was given that these ships would
continue to be available for this
service.
Our own tonnage, of course. Is In
creasing and some of the Japanese
ships obtained in exchange for steel
plates in the negotiations of last
spring are now coming into our pos
session, ccording to recent announce
ment. With these resources there
seems litle question of our ability to
keep up the record figures of the
past months.
The required manpower must
come from America. We are the
allied reserve. The stage of the wnr
Is now reached when the reserves
have been called up. The faster they
arrive the quicker the finish.
Fiqhtincj the Blond Beast
[X. A. Review's War Weekly]
The increasing activities on other
fronts than the western are to be
regarded with satisfaction. Italian
troops are making -ery substantial
progress in Albania, other progress
is being made north of Salonikl. and
intervention in Russia, both In Si
beria and Murmanla, is an achieved
fact. We repeat pur conviction that
this is sound policy. Much as we ap
preciate the necessity "of throwing
our strength chiefly upon the west
ern front, we hold that when you
are at war with an enemy you are
at war with him all over, and that
It is desirable to strike wherever he
appears vulnerable, and to block him
at every point at which he seeks to
advance. Let us mass our millions,
by all means. In France and Flan
ders. and conduct the hunting of the
Blond Beast across the Vosges and
the Rhine. But still we can spare
enough men to help Russia to re
habilitate herself and to prevent her
from falling into the hands of Hun
nish ravishers.
A French Schoolgirl's View
"It was a Uttje river—almost a
brook. It was called the Yser. One
could talk from side to side without
raisins one's voice. The birds could
fly over it with one sweeD of their
wings. And on Its banks there were
millions of men, the one turned to
ward the other, eye'to eye. But the
difference which separated them
was greater than that betweeh the
stars in the sky. It was the differ
ence which separates Justice from
injustice.
"The ocean Is so (treat that the
seagulls do not dare to cross It. For
seven days and seven nights tfie
great steamships from America, gro
in* at full speed, must drive through
the deep waters before the light
houses of France come Into view.
But from one side to another
hearts are touching."
Sisters of the Secretary of State
Write of Canteen Work in France
MISS EMMA S. LANSING and
Miss Katherine E. Lansing,
sisters of the Secretary of
State, have been working with the
American Red Cross in France since
last September. They are now con
ducting a canteen in a village near
the front where they are often under
fire. Following are extracts of letters
addressed to Secretary and Mrs.
Lansing in March and April:
"Thirty bombs were dropped here
last night. Those of us who were
not on duty at the canteen last night
sat in a cave belonging to the Sisters
of Mercy listening to the popping of
the mitrailleuse, the roaring of the
cannon, and the bursting of bombs,
but feeling pretty safe so far under
ground.
"March 14, at the canteen, 4 a. m.
—Last Saturday night the clocks
were all set ahead one hour, and, I
assure you, when we leave the can
teen a little after 6 in the morning
it is still very cold, although the
weather is wonderful—full of sun
shine all day. I had only four hours'
sleep last night, as we had an alerte
and had to stay dressed, fearing our
evening visitors, who are frequent.
They come about the same hour
each night—a little before 9. Our
orders are never to go out after the
alerte sounds, except to get to a cel
lar. Very near the canteen the
French have built an abri for us
which will hold about fifty people,
and only two doors from here is an
excellent cave, to which the Sisters
of Mercy have given us a key.
A Glimpse of the Canteen
"April 11, 3.30 a. m.—l am writing
at the canteen, where I am on the
shift from midnight to 7 o'clock. 1
wish I could give you an idea of the
atmosphere here at night. In front of
me a group of French infantry with
one Zouave is playing cards. Near
by is one of the blackest of negroes I
have ever seen, in the blue uniform
of the French, walking up and down
to keep himself awake. An Ameri
can ambulance man is playing the
piano; an Italian is sitting at a table
.eating bread and cheese; and the
whole large salle is tilled with sol
diers sleeping, talking or listening to
the music. My letter has been inter
rupted a number of times; once by
an American soldier who wanted to
tell me how he happened to enlist,
all about his family, and 'the girl,'
and he wished to show me their
photographs; and again by a French
soldier, who wanted to tell about his
family.
"April 24.—1 have been out buy
ing a wedding present for one of
my 'filleuls.' Did I tell you that I have
now about 45 soldiers to whom I
write more or less often? I am very
unhappy about some of them, from
whom I have not heard since their
part in the big battle.
SLEEP, LADDIE, SLEEP
[The War Department announced
that on recommendation of General
Pershing no bodies of deceased of
ficers and soldiers would be sent to
this country until after the close of
the war.]
Under the lilies of France they lie.
Silently taking their last, long
rest;
And the soft breeze murmurs in
passing by.
While rivulets echo the tender
behest.
Sleep, laddie, sleep.
While onward shall pour the vic
torious band.
And the Teuton be crumpled
behind his frontier;
.Though the hoarse shout of triumph
shall fill all the land,
And an eagerly listening world
shall hear.
Sleep, laddie, sleep.
When .our boys shall at last sail back
o'er the deep
With freedom established forever
and ay,
They shall not be unmindful, O lad,
in your sleep,
But tenderly stooping shall bear
you away.
So sweetly sleeping.
And under the lilies of home you
?hall rest
e nature seems poised In
tenderest prayer;
And the thought of a land who Went
over the crest
Sl)all render that mound surpas
singly fair
While you sleep, laddie, sleep.
—Elbert Robb Zarlng.
• "The 'poilu' who is being married
has gone into aviation and is readv
to begin his flights now. He had
three days in which to be married.
He brought his fiancee to see me, and
I have letters from her. Because I
could not go to the wedding just
now they proposed to postpone it.
"May B.—l have just finished a
letter of condolence to the widow of
one of my 'poilus.' He was married
on the 23d and on the 26th fell in
his aeroplane and was killed.
Rhcims Cathedral
"May 10.—Yesterday I made a
visit to Rheims. We approached it
from a hill; so long before we reach
ed the city we saw the cathedral out
lined against the sky, majestic and
apparently perfect. We approached
over camouflaged roads and through
a city forsaken—a city of the dead.
The cathedral is still lovely in its
state of semidestruction. The beau
tiful outlines are there and the tow
ers are still standing, although badly
weakened Two large shell holes are
in the roof, while the altar is com
pletely destroyed. As we drove away
we got out of the car and mounted a
little hill by the roadside and look
ed back, and out of a mist that was
filling the valley we saw the city, so
beloved by all France, rising like a
dream city. I shall never forget it."
A Well-Equipped Hospital
"East week 1 went all over the
hospital here. It is wonderfully 'well
equipped and has accommodation for
1,000 beds. There is a fine corps df
surgeons in charge who all use the
new apparatus of the war. I have
done a good deal of visiting in the
hospital in my spare momftits and r
love it. The soldiers are so happy to
see us and so grateful for every lit
tle gift of paper, a flower, or a cigar
ret. One of the doctors I found care
fully cherishing a postcard picture
of President Wilson and he is anxious
for a better picture. Will you get one
for me to give to him? Another sur
geon wanted a map of the United
States. He says he meets many doc
tois who tell him where they live in
America and he would like to study
a map."
Work In the Canteen Kitchen
"May 23.—We have had very hot
weather lately and several nights in
the kitchen it was 85 degrees and ex
tremely humid. At night we have to
Have all the doors and windows
closed to keep out the light, so jiot a
breath of air comes in, and working
in such an atmosphere is exhausting.
With cooking vegetables and meat
and an oven for heating water for the
dishes, and a seething mass of hu
manity, it is a little torrid to say the
least * * * I wrote you of the
nice little garden back of our house,
where we rat out and had our meals.
We found browntail caterpillars on
one of the trees and so now we must
keep out of the garden."
The Twenty-Eighth in Fray
[Pittsburgh Gazette-Times]
Secondary in importance to Pltts
burghers and all other Pennsylva
nlans only to the news of continued
allied success yestertlay was the
statement of General March, chief
of staff, concerning the identity of
the troops engaged, for in the list of
divisions appeared the Twenty
eighth, Pennsylvania's own and for
merly the National Guard
state. Nothing, unless it were the
announcement that the Eightieth,
composed of selectives from this im
mediate district, was in the battle,
too, could bring the war home any
more sharply. It Is as.though the
firing line were only a few miles
away and all our sons and brothers
were out on It. No longer is the
western front a mere expression, re
mote in its implications. The boys,
who a little while ago were patrolling
the Mexican border, in canip on
Schenley Oval or !{j training at Camp
Hancock, are now fighting, actually
fighting, for us. They have reached
the last stretch of the long road that
led out from home when they beard
the call. From now on the Twenty
eighth—with Its glorious old Eight
eenth and Tenth and
will be pointing toward-victory and
the transports that will bring them
home again.
No Nonsense
"I shall stand no nonsense from
the United States," the kaiser said
to Ambassador Gerard. The boys
from the United States were guilty
of some rank "rfonsense" around
about Solssons last week. The kais
er's men did not "stand" the "non
sense." They ran.—JohnstownTrib
une. J
JULY 25, 1918.
BOOKS AND MAGAZINES ]
The Putnams announce that they
have in train for immediate publica
tion "The Devastation of Europe,"
by Dr. Wilhelm Muehlon. This is the
American copyright edition, the
volume being issued by special ar
rangement with the Swiss publish
ers.
Dr. Muehlon, himself a German,
and formerly director of the great
Krupp works, in this remarkable
volume has bared the German plot
to despoil Europe. The book, com
ing from the pen of one who, th6ugh
now in exile, was until recently most
intimately connected with the rul
ing gr<4up in the empire, is an his
toric document of the first import
ance, containing revelations that
even a public surfeited with sensa
tions will read with woiidwr, accord
ing to the publishers.
Judicial Investigation to determ
ine the Identity of the anonymous
author of two widely circulated
anti-German books, "J'Accuse" and
"The Crime," has been ordered by
the Swiss government. A cable from
Paris states that a dispatch from
Berne to this effect has just been re
ceived by the Temps.
The book "J'Accuse," published
in this Country by George H. Doran
Company under the title, "I Accuse!"
was suppressed by the Swiss govern
ment in March, 1916, and it became
a capital offense In Germany to have
a copy of the volume In one's posses
sion. The author was simply given
as "A German," and he was the first
to bring a scathing Indictment
against his own country as respon
sible for the war. The book has been
attributed to various sources. "The
Crime," which followed by the same
hand, was a work of even more vig
orous character.
OUR DAILY LAUGH 1
THE SCORE. f
What's all this? li \
That's the golf VI
ncore of a newly jKL- jib
engaged couple. *i
They went around
lp -45 kisses and y
HIS LIITTL.H
joke.
I V' ♦£? IWWi Th® one above
' ¥\ —Hey! where are
3 A fjUjmm The one below
—Oh, just taking
a Btro jj around
m the block!
WHT NOT? (Jj
Hey, boys!
Come on in out of fir
the rain! ATi />
UeS
POOR MONK!
barber, I -want mj
n * C ' t B^ ave< "
THE CAUSE.
Mr. Fish: What
ras the cause of U J.
•our husband's
Widow Fish:
lie hookworm!.
\rZfLc\ PREPARED.
C .££ The pen is
fflMr M mightier than the
jC"" That's good
[iJ news. I think It Is
t , 'jf i- --**> agreed that. our
It:! /' pens are about
Jr ' th ® b ®* t lu th *
.....
Bmtttuj (Eljat
"Williamsport has an institution
that I wish Harrisburg would find it
possible to copy," said a returning
traveler yesterday. "I refer to the
Red Cross booth at the railroad sta
tion. Williamsport Is well situated
for this, better than Harrisburg, In
fact. There is an open plaza in
front of the station and a broad
lawn along the side. On this the
Red Cross canteen branch has
I erected a trim little frame build
ing, in the rear of which is a tent
|to store the supplies. The frame
structure is used during cold or wet
weather, but during days like these
little tables are spread under trees.
Not a soldier passes through Wil
liamsport these days who is missed
by the bright-eyed, prettily-uni
formed Rod Cross girls, who are al
ways on hand with a cheerful word
and an Invitation to have anything
from an ice cream cone to a sub
stantial lunch, with hot coffee or
iced tea on the side.
"While waiting for a train the oth
er day—trains being late in Wil
liamsport as well as most every
where else these times—l amused
myself by observing how the canteen
worked. A train came in over the
Lehigh Valley. Immediately the
two girls in charge at the time ap
peared with ice cream cones. They
sold them to the perspiring passen
gers, even the "candy butcher' and
the conductor taking one each. The
profits, I learned, went into the up
keep of the canteen and the girls
said that mpst people gave them
from ten cents to a quarter and
didn't ;wk for change, although they
charged but a nickel for the cone.
But the moment a tired, drooping
soldier with a big satchel in tow
hove in sight the girls forsook their
customers and headed straight for
him.
" 'Thirsty?' asked one.
" 'I should say YES,' replied the
soldier, mopping his brow and smil
ing.
" 'Well, come right over here and
sit down,' added the girl, leading
him gently toward a table, and you
can Just bet that young private nev
er made the least resistance.
"Before you could say Jack Rob
ison the girls had dished up for him
a tall and clinking glass of lemon
ade and he wound up with the sec
ond glass. About that time another
overheated soldier in heavy O. D.
uniform came lumbering up under a
heavy load and was towed into the
cool cilm of the same table beneath
a tree, where he chose Ice cream
cones—three of them.
"Then came the next part of the
program, and by far the most inter
esting to me. The first soldier fin
ished his drink and asked the price.
" 'Not a penny from you,' replied
the pretty waitress. 'I have a
brother in the Engineers and I hope
some girl will do the same for him.'
•The other lad got a similar answer
to his query as to price and both
went away happy over the little at
tention shown th%m and the better
for this contact with the Red Cross,
"I was wondering as my train
pulled in," added the observer, "if
we in Harrisburg couldn't do some
thing like that on our depot plaza."
"Good night, Germany," sing the
vaudeville artists. Vaudeville peo
ple don't stop at elimination of Ger
man ideals and the German lan
guage, but sauerkraut, hamburg
steak and German cheese have been
hoycotted to such an extent that the
Hotel Columbus doesn't serve these
dainties any longer. The demand
for hamburg steak isn't satisfied, but
the waiter will sell you an order of
Harrisburg steak, which is the same
thing. At the Bergstresser House in
Walnut street an actor was offered
some mustard the other evening. Ha
was about to use some on his meat
when he chanced to see that it was
called "German mustard." "Ntithin
Jdoin'! I'll use ketchup!" he said.
• •
The park benches in River Front
Park had a good bath yesterday
morning, when V. Grant Forrer, As
sistant Superintendent of City Parks,
commandeered some firehose and
chased the dust from the seats. It
was refreshing to see how clean and
'nvlting the benches were after their
shower Jiath. "That bath was need
ed," said a member of the River
Front Park fraternity. "When T
wanted to ait on the benches I had
o carry paper with me. Without
naper, T'd have been covered with
'lust from head to foot."
• • •
< Right In line with the Telegraph's
move for better housing conditions
imong the poorer classes of the city,
"omes a little story of how one man
's trying to do his part In making
bis own surroundings more attrac
tive. "Brother Jeems" is quite an
enterprising colored resident who
has built him a new "bungalow" in
the much-congested district, cover
'ng the outside with tin flattened
from cans of all sorts. Inside, the
walls are papered with the dallv
nress and dozens of photographs of
movie staes cut from magazines.
"Why doan yo' have some fotv
irrafF of preslduns and sich?" asked
-i neighbor.
"Well. I s'pose I should have
some of T.lncum and Wash'n'ton."
said he. "but me. I hasn't mucH
beauty in ma famblv, and me, Tse a
great lover of it. an' so T takes the
olcters of the pretty 11T gals and
nut 'em up whar I c'n see 'em all
de time."
• *
Senator William C. Sproul, beside)
being a newspaperman and poll,
tielnn. is an antiquarian, too, re
sembling the late Governor Pennv.
nacker In love of research into his.
torlcal state affairs. In the Senator's
home, near Chester, there Is a I'.
hrary of fine books on statecraft
nolltics, history, etc., and the collec
tion Is numerous and cost'v enough
to please the greatest bibliophile Ir
Pennsylvania. Since there Is everv
prospect that Senator Sproul will
serve a term as Governor of the
state, this experience. will serve to In- 4
crease his antlnnarlan knowledge!
and American literature may on<
day he enriched by a valuable work
—bearing on the archaeology of this
state or of the nation, written by
him.
* • *
Un in Yiewlstown. the biggest to-vn
in the Juniata valley, many thrifty
citizens are doing "their best" rather
than "their bit" to help the land of
their nativity In Its efforts to aid in
bringing* the haughtv Hun to his
knees. Hundreds of youths from
this section are doing military ser
vice, but (he folks at home, too. nr
busy. The eight-hour railroad law
permits employes much time to
themselves, but many.of these rail
roaders are working six and eight
hours dallv at other employment to
help relieve the acute labor short
age. prevalent In the numerous es.
sentlal Industries operating In Dew's.
Niwn and its Immediate vicinity, Th
ftnnpclal benefits accruing to th"<i
patriots are high, but Just a* vabt.
able are their efforts to the Unita<|
States.