Harrisburg telegraph. (Harrisburg, Pa.) 1879-1948, December 31, 1917, Page 6, Image 6

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    6
HARRISBUXG TELEGRAPH
A NEWSPAPER FOR THE HOME
Pounded iljl
Published evenings except Sunday by
THE TELEGRAM! PRINTING CO..
Tele*ral> Building, Federal Square.
TE. J. STACK POLE, prest & Ediltr-inChief
P. R. OYSTER, Business Manager.
GUS M. STEINMETZ, Managing Editor.
Member of the Associated Press —The
Associated Press la exclusively en
titled to the use for republication of
all news dispatches credited to it or
not otherwise credited in this paper
and also the local news published
herein.
All rights of republication of special
f dispatches herein are also reserved.
Member American
Newspaper Pub
(Chicago, 111.
Entered at the Post Office in Harris
burg, Pa., as second class matter.
By carriers, ten cents a
dTftßsfrMSjtKHil week; by mail. 55.00
MWrifrf- a year in advanca.
MONDAY, DECEMBER :tt, 1017
Advertity borrows its sharpest j
sling from our impatience. — BlSHOl*
Hokxe.
A PATRIOTIC SERVICE
TIIE members of the Dauphin
County Bar who have been giv
ing their services to assist draft
ed men in properly filling out their
questionnaires, have performed a
patriotic duty of a very important
character. They have given freely
|V of their time for several weeks and
have placed their knowledge of the
law at the disposal of those who
chose to seek it. They have saved
■ hundreds of conscripted men from
■ making mistakes that might have
: placed them in embarrassing situa-
I tions later.
■ When a lawyer or a physician
■ gives his services he gives his entire
I stock in trade, which is more than
' most of us who deal in more ma
terial things would care to do. This
I makes the action of the lawyers all
the more praiseworthy.
I P TO TIIE COI\NTIES
F ill years the farmers of Penn
sylvania have been complaining
that it was unprofitable to raise
sheep because when the market
prices for wool and mutton were
■ satisfactory dogs raided the flocks
W l>> night and the owners had all
■ kinds of trouble to collect the money
the State allows and requires the
comities to pay. Between dogs with
out domiciles and Democratic doc
trine in wool tariff form the sheep
raiser had troubles of his own. The
war has nullified the evils of the
Democratic wool tariff and the mut
ton chop is a delicacy. Pennsylva
nia has provided a dog code.
Under the terms of the dog code
every Pennsylvania canine outside
of Philadelphia, Pittsburgh and
Kcranton, and there are some hun
dreds of thousands of them, will
have to wear a tag after January
33. Furtherforo, / every owner of a
dog must have it penned up or tied
tip after dark. Experience has
shown that dogs raid sheep at night.
By thus establishing ownership it
is held that on the same principle
that dictates the method of dog
catching in cities the Unlicensed
dogs will be destroyed. The law
makes it the duty of constables to
kill unlicensed dogs and requires
that County Commissioners pay the
costs for each killing. The proceeds
of licenses go to the county treas
uries.
It is thus up to the County Com
missioners to enforce the dog law.
3t may be a hardship on some own
ers to pay the license and it may be
difficult to kill some dogs, but there
are too many, it must be admitted.
And it must also be allowed that if
the State is to raise sheep dogs must
be kept under control. It will be
expensive for a few years, but if the
counties do not act the State can
end in its policemen, clear out the
ownerless dogs, many of which are
half wild in some counties, and
charge up the cost to the Commis
sioners.
A PLACE TO COUPIJE CP
A MOST amassing lack of uni
formity In regulations for the
control of smallpox between
the Slates east of the Mississippi has
been revealed by the efforts of Penn
sylvania's State Department of
Health to check Ihe outbreaks which
have occurred in western and cen
tral counties. There is more small
pox In the State now than known
for years, in spite of all the efforts
being made, and new patients are be
ins reported almost dally. The in
■ iHlon has spread from place to
■ and is so readily traceable that|
■ remedy appears to be plain.
" Men have come from comniunl
jm ties in Ohio, Michigan and some
southern States whero smallpox exists
without let or hindrance. In fact.
In one instance a whole crew of la
borers went from Cleveland to near
Pittsburgh when smallpox prevailed
and authorities had to employ guards
to round up the whole party. Small
pox has appeared in people from
Akron to Detroit frequently andj
some of the southern negroes do not
'' seem to mind the disease except that
it prevents them from going about.
Uniform regulations regarding dis
eases are as necessary to proper con
, servation aa pooling of railroads.
MONDAY EVENING,
I War breeds disease. There should be
little difficulty about compelling iso-'
latlon of smallpox.
WON'T SLACK HERE
ARRISBURG'S reputation as a
city which does what it sets out
to do will not be dimmed as a result
of the forthcoming campaign to raise
$25,000 for the Knights of Colum
bus War Camp Fund. In his state
ment of several days agp Bishop Mc-
Devitt called attention to the great
good being accomplished by the
Knights of Columbus through their
activities in all training camps; and
from time to time the Telegraph has
published letters from Harrisburg
soldiers who praise the Knights of
Columbus and the Young Men's
Christian Association in no uneer
/
tain terms for the great good they
are doing.
"All war and no play," it might be
said, "makes Jack a dull boy." And
these recreation centers in the train
ing camps are going to go a great
way toward keeping the United
States soldiers clean morally and
physically.
The sum of $?5,000 is not a large
one. Harrisburg owes it to all its
several thousand soldiers to bo lib
eral in its contributions to the K. of
C. fund. And it is a peculiarly re
freshing thing to note that in the
prosecution of this campaign the
Knights of Columbus have been en
thusiastically joined by prominent
men who are not members of the
Catholic church, as the Y. M. C. A.
campaign workers were joined by
prominent Harrisburg men not be
longing to evangelical churches.
OUT WITH THEM
SERGEANT EMPEY, speaking in
Harrisburg Friday evening,
said:
The soldiers in the field will
cheerfully do 60 per cent, of the
fighting; it is for you at home to
do the vest, lighting the German
effort in this country to nullify
our determination to v.*in the war.
I am out after this type of Ger
man-American. As Roosevelt said,
use the big stick on them. If you
tap the wrong one apologize after
the war, but get after nil of them
now.
The arrest of a German who had
tampered with parts of torpedoes he
was engaged in turning out in a gov
ernment factory for the use of the
American fleet, illustrates the danger
Empey had ill mind. The folly of our
too trusting confidence in every Ger
man who pretends to be friendly may
cost us a frightful disaster one of
these days. German agents by the
thousands swarm over the country, i
and the Roosevelt "big stick," as i
Empey says, is none too good for j
them. Indeed, about the only "per
suader" the present day German can i
understand is the kind Empey him- ;
self displayed during his demonstra- '
tion of trench warfare—a wire- 1
bound, lead-loaded, two-handed I
club, as long as a baseball bat and 1
designed to be laid across the backs
of the skull with the full force of a i
two-armed blow. The sneak In the
dark, the poisoner of Red Cross '
bandages, the thrower of bombs, the j
slayer of women and children, has i
sunk so low that there can be no '
argument with him save that of
brute force. Ambassador Gerard once .
told the Kaiser that there is a lamp- 1
post for every disloyal German- '
American in the United States, andji
the time is rapidly approaching when '
some of them may be put to use. 1
With full knowledge of German ]
capabilities for intrigue, plotting and
treachery what folly it is to permit
them in our munition and war sup- 1
ply factories. ,
IXJCAIj FREIGHT PROBLEMS
GOVERNMENT control of rail
roads doubtless will do much to
stimulate freight movement,
and elimination of competition
should go a long way toward the
prompt handling of traffic, but
neither government control nor own
ership will solve the country's trans
portation problem, which is largely
of a local nature. The getting of
farm products from country to city
and from town to town is the real
big puzzle of peace times. For ex
ample, apples went to waste in the
Cumberland Valley and in Perry
county the past fall because it did
not pay to haul them to the railroads
and thence to the city. Also, for ex
ample, .potatoes a few weeks ago
were a drug on the market in York
county while selling for $1.25 a
bushel here. Lack of means of get
ting their goods to market kept the
York county farmers from obtaining
fair prices for their vegetables and
prevented Harrisburg people from
buying comparatively cheap po
tatoes.
What is the answer? There are
two answers, the motor truck and
good roads. The gasoline driven
freight vehicle is just coming into
its own. in a few years it will be
come the great medium of transpor
tation between town and farm—go
ing where railroads cannot and do
ing Its work with one loading and
very quickly and cheaply. From a
doubtful experiment as a farm im
plement the motorized freight car
is fast becoming a recognized aid to
agricultural efficiency. And so with
the automobile proper. It is no
longer a pleasure car. It has. become
| a passenger car; a utility Instead of
I a luxury. And Just as the motor
truck is replacing the local freight,
so | will the motor bus replace, In
mniny localities, the rural "accom
modation" trains. All thlß, of course,
being dependent upon the improve
ment of roads.
I
• ... 11 I
Ck
By the Ex-Committeeman
Pennsylvania's Democratic state
machine, which has been run around
the track a couple of times lately to
Keep the placeholders in mind of the
l'act that it takes money tq_ keep an
organization going' in cold weather
as well as in the heat of a campaign,
was givon a - jolt yesterday right in
the home of the Democratic national
chairman.
The Harrisburg Democratic As
sociation, composed of prominent
Democrats of this city and headed
by T. K. VanDyke, who is a Demo
crat in time of storm and sunshine,
adopted resolutions culling for a re
vival of the old-tipie unbossed
Democratic state conventions. The
action was taken late Saturday in
the form of resolutions which urge
that the Democrats have a conven
tion to discuss platforms and the
merits of candidates in advance of
the primary. It is pointed out that
the primary act only takes away the
right to make nominations and that
conventions are desirable.
As the Democratic bosses of Penn
sylvania are to meet on the banks of
the Potomac this week to slate Na
tional Chairman Vance C. McCormick
for the gubernatorial nomination for
the folks at homo the idea to dis
cuss merits of candidates will not be
popular here.
The VanDyke resolutions were not
[given much publicity by the Demo
cratic machine organs to-day, al
though big Democratic papers like
the Philadelphia Record gave the
subject prominence. At the Demo
cratic windmill the millers refused
to talk, being very busy sucking the
grain that has come in from the
faithful.
The resolution as adopted and Mr.
VanDykes' comment are as follows:
Whereas, the uniform primary law
has not abolished the holding of a
state convention, and it is desirable
that delegates from every county in
the state should thus assemble in
order to give expression to the
wishes of their constituents and
formulate into a party platform the
fundamental principles on which the
Democratic party stands, as well as
give expression to the prevailing
views of the voters as to who would
make the best candidates for state
officers to be elected in the state at
large, and also for the purpose of
gathering the Democrats of tho state
together again in a free, unbossed
old-time Democratic blow-out; there
fore, be it
Resolved, That the Harrisburg
Democratic Association heartily
favors the calling together of such
convention, and urges the Demo
cratic state committee to revive this
necessary Democratic reform.
"Judge McCarrell, of this county,
has decided in a Philadelphia elec
tion case that the uniform primary
law has not in any way abrogated
the holding of state conventions,"
said Chairman VanDyke, "and those
conventions can'still be held and do
everything they formerly did before
the passage of that law, except ac
tually nominate state candidates. It
was the opinion of all the members
present at this meeting that, if we
are to maintain real Democratic prin
ciples. the Democratic state conven
tion should be called." .
—Mayor-elect E. V. Babcock, of
Pittsburgh, has announced that he
will name Stephen Stone, son of the
former Governor, as his city solici
tor. The directors will be named
some time this week, it is believed,
although the new Mayor may wait
until he takes office.
—Jefferson county is real "dry"
now. The lawyers did not file any
applications for licenses on advice of
the court.
—Mrs. J. O. Miller, head of the
Woman Suffrage organization, says
that all the Pennsylvania Congress
men will be found behind the woman
suffrage amendment. She has issued
a statement in which she intimates
that It is all over with the antis.
—Governor Brumbaugh's appoint
ment of a registration commissioner
to succeed Mayor A. T. Connell, of
Scranton, is being eagerly awaited
in that county. There are half a
dozen candidates and every leader
seems to have a man up his sleeve.
—Concerning the dinner to Mayot
Armstrong, in Pittsburgh, the Phila
delphia Ledger says it will be a sort
of party council. It remarks: "The
<Senator will meet his lieutenants
from several counties in Western
Pennsylvania and learn from Alle
gheny leaders particularly that they
favor Senator Sproul for the Repub
lican nomination for Governor.
Fayette county may bring a boom
for Republican State Chairman
Crow. The western conferences,
which probably will last several
days, will discuss candidates for
other state offices and for Congress
men-nt-large. M. M. Garland, at
present a Congressman-at-large,
probably will run this time from
his homo district in Allegheny. This
may be duo to the fact that Alle
gheny leaders want one of their
home allies to be 'slated' for Secre
tary of Internal Affairs. Senator
Sproul, a candidate for Governor,
probably will attend the Armstrong
dinner also. The belief among poli
ticians is that both the Vare and
Penrose elements will unite on
Sproul to succeed Governor Brum
baugh. The Pittsburgh conferences,
many thought, probably will settle
the gubernatorial situation."
—Senator Penrose and a number
of prominent Republicans will at
tend the dinner to Mayor Joseph G.
Armstrong just before he retires
from office at Pittsburgh. It is ex
pected that it will have an impor
tant bearing on the Mayoralty.
—Judge Swartz, of Montgomery,
has held that a man who voted the
straight Socialist ticket and then in
the Democratic column voted for
a justice of tlie peace for which
there was no Socialist candidate cast
a valid ballot, to be counted for all
the candidates voted for. The case
is similar to that of a straight vote
for the Town Meeting ticket in Phil
adelphia, last November, nnd a mark
in the Republican column for Dis
trict Attorney Rotan.
—Col. Henry H. Foote, Wellsboro
lawyer, is out with an announce
ment of his candidacy for Congress
In the Fifteenth district.
—Senator Clarence J. Ruckman
on Saturday announced his deter
mination to be a candidate to suc
ceed himself as Senator from Bucks
county. Senator Buckman just prior
to the adjournment of the last ses
sion of the Senate was elected to
the office of .president pro tem. to
succeed E. E. Beidleman, of Dau
phin county. He has been a mem
ber of the State Senate since 1910.
lie had previously served one term
in the State House of Representa
lives. He is a native of Bucks coun
ty. having been born in Middletown
township in 1879. He is a graduate
of the law department of the Uni
versity of Pennsylvania and Is asso-
HARRISBURG HfUjftj TELEGRAPH
THE DAYS OF REAL SPORT . .... .... BYBRIGGS
16 ? "".
ciated with his brother in the law
firm of Buckman &: Buckraan and
will be re-elected easily say his
friends.
—Mayor Thomas B. Smith says
Philadelphia Councils must repass
the budget so that, there will be no
questions about it.
—William J. Rorke, a lawyer,
has announced himself as a candi
date to succeed Senator Janies P.
McNichol.
—Governor Brumbaugh, while in
town yesterday met a number of his
friends, with whom he discussed the
matter of filling the vacancies on
the State Public Service Commission,
says the Sunday Inquirer. Retiring
City Treasurer William. McCoacli,
who is the Vare leader of the Thir
tieth ward, is an aspirant for a place
and his friends are confidently pre
dicting his appointment. There is a
report from Pittsburgh that former
Mayor William A. Magee, who re
signed from the Public Service
Commission to run for Mavor and
who was defeated for that office by
E. V. Babcock, the Penrose choice,
is being considerc 1 for appointment
to his old position. There are now
two vacancies to be filled by the
Governor on the Commission.
illiam B. Palmer, former
Media postmaster, will become chief
sheriff's deputy of Delaware county.
—Representatives- Cyrus M. Pal
mar and R. J. Graeff have ambitions
to succeed Auditor General Snvder
ip the Senate. Palmer would also
like to be District Attorney.
—Joseph Van Dyke, of Carbon
county, brother of Warren Van
Dyke, secretary of the Democratic
State Committee, has been selected
as revenue collector for the Bethle
hem district.
-Ex-Representative G. C. Her
man, of ICutztown, has been appoint
ed clerk to the Berks county con
troller.
—Congressman-at-I,arge M. M.
Garland, of Pittsburgh, will trv con
clusions with M. Clyde Kelly in the
old Dalzell district.
APPLE A DAY
The apple Industry in the United
states to-day represents a stupendous
commercial achievement. It had
•■rrown to C 9 million barrels in 1896;
it dropped to 28 million barrels in
1911, and went up again to 40 mil
lion barrels in 1912. From this date
forward there is a continual increase
in the production, for the great cit
ies of the world are crying for ap
nles, and people everywhere are lust
Seginning to apprehend the actual
value of this delicate fruit. We are
turning backward to our heritage,
for in the days of our great-grand
fathers the common adage was:
"An apple a day will keep the doc
tor away." Fruit as a part of the
diet renresents a. most health-giving
element—From the Christian Her
ald.
TRANQUILLITY
Better is an handful with quiet
ness, than both the hands full with
travail and vexation of spirit.—Ec
clesiastes 4:6.
CRINOLINE DAYS
Grandmother sits in her old rock
ing chair
Telling the stitches so daintily there,
Draped in a shawl of an ancient de
sign.
Features all wrinkled with love In
each line,
Tuckered and ruffled in old-fashion
ed grays,
Knitting and dreaming of crinoline
days.
Ah, crinoline days in her flowery
dreams
Dimple and ripple like meadowland
streams;
Over some moment all golden she
throws
The loop of her yarn a* she stitch
ingly goes
Into the dream laden memory haze,
Back to the pleasures of crinoline
days '
Here Is a dream of an old-fashioned
dance,
JJream of a lover and stealthy ro
mance,
Dream of a moon on an arbor,
where low
A soldier boy whispered to her long;
ago;
Dreaming she knits, and dreaming
she strays
Back to the pleasures of crinoline
days.
Ah, soldier boy, soldier boy, lost
long ago,
Grandmother stitches her love for
you so
Into a gift for a soldier of mine,
Looped in the stitches our love
shall entwine.
Warmly enfold you and keep you
always
Fit for the maidens of erinollne
days.
—By Jay B. Iden.
Land of Afterwards
FROM my new edge of conscious
ness I looked about. Pack in
the distance, leaning against a
wind, went eld Sergeant Death
through the blown powder smoke
mounting to the posts of cinnabar.
"The Father of the Regiments"—
how we had walked with him and
talked with him, chaffed with him
and laughed with him, until we had
learned the goodness beneath his
grim old face and he had bared our
soldier-souls! He was a comrade go
ing, and I saluted his back with sor
row. I'll see him again perhaps,
parading the souls trooping here
from the war.
"Is this heaven? Where is this?"
I asked of a white horseman on a
white charger.
"This?" He looked down at me
thoughtfully. "This is Afterwards,"
he smiled; and wheeled off towards
a waiting squadron of fair chivalry.
In this Afterwards I've found the
boys. You know who everyone is
here without being told. The boys
of the air and of the sea, you meet
them; light thrills —you know them
and their legend; they know you.
Often we look up and find Lord
Michael himself, leaning on his
sharp, subduing sword, listening
when the yearns are precipitous and
there is through them the wif-waf c-f
guns and the gleam of bayonets. He
is all ruddy and very handsome, the
Archangel of War, with level lidded
eyes. Once he sang for us a sword
song, a sharp, winged song.
DARED SPEAK*ENGLISH
As we dined together one evening
in a widely-known Berlin restaurant,
we were conversing in English.
Seated at the next table was a quar- i
tet of olflcers, home on furlough.
Presently a waiter stepped up to us
and said that the officers objected
to our speaking the English tongue.
Knowing that we were well within
our rights, we refused to discontinue
the conversation. The four officers
then rose, stood stiffly at attention,
and demanded that we be ejected
from the restaurant. It, was a very
unpleasant and humiliating experi
ence: but, as we look back, we can
not fail to see the humor of it, with
the men standing so ridiculously
straight in the center of the place.
The American, as host, approach
ed the group and endeavored to ex
plain; but he was swept aside with
haughty gestures. When he re
turned to the table, the proprietor
informed him that he would be un
able to serve the rest of the meal,
and we were "ompelled to leave the
restaurant.
The incident leaked into print and
caused considerable discussion. The
verdict, however, was in favor of the
officers, and their very rude and un
called for action met with universal
approbation.—Adele N. and Russell
Philips in the Atlantic Monthly.
"FINEST CLUB IN WORLD"
The front line trench is the street
of adventure. No matter how quiet
the day or night, there is always an
air of Imminency and expectancy.
Oh this front line street of adven
ture one meets the truest men of
his time. There there is a real de
mocracy nrffl a real brotherhood.
The mere fact that each is there de
mands respect from the other.
Among my priceless memories of
the real front is that of junior head
quarters' mess in the line. Among
ourselves we often referred to this
mess as the "Finest Club in the
World," and its young members have
perhaps made a good bid for the
title.
The junior headquarters' mesa in
cludes the scout officer, machine gun
officer, bombing officer, trench mor
tar officer, intelligence officer and
forward observing officer. Member
ship in this, the "Finest Club in the
World," is not apt to be of long
duration, sis its members frequently
"go west." During the period of
their active membership they
sent many of the stars on the stage
of the world war. Of course, the
generals' names are splashed across
the billboards, but wo who have
really been there know that these
mere boys are the leading actors on
the stage. Generals may direct the
scenery, but it Is for the junior of
ficers to carry out the drama. Hence
the saying, "This is a subalterns'
war."—Captain Arthur Hunt Chute
in Harper's Magazine.
ONE ESSENTIAL
Brain foods some dealers advertise.
But of this fact take heed,
No food for brains will make us wise
Unless we've brains to feed.
—Boston Transcript.
Once the Mad Major asked him.
with his high Oxford manner anil
drawl, "I say, sir, did you really pull
up the mountains by the roots and
throw them about, that time of yoin
close-in with Lucifer and the rest?"
"Does not my old friend Milton
say so?" reproached Lord Michael,
with a sort of gleaming gravity.
1 wish I might tell you how beau
tiful all these men are, how cleansed
are all words, what new values there
are everywhere. It is good to have
all words walking cleanly hero, nak
ed and unashamed, vital with the Bap
and flow of life. It is good to know
the wonder and beauty of one's com
rades and the glory of the fire in
their hearts.
O my mother, you who are in life,
say to all the women in the home
steads, dwelling with the ghosts of
the slain, say that the boys whose
arms were once strong around them
are now no army of silent boys ly
ing beneath the crooked wooden
crosses. Say that the bugles are
sounding magic notes, and the trum
pets calling to the spirit, and the
striding comely boys footing it
straight and proud on some new
way.
We must not have you mothers
back there, blind with tears of your
weeping, while we press eagerly on
with new knowledge and new pow
er at every pause.—Nan Moulton in
the Atlantic Monthly.
DRINKING FALLS OFF
By our effort in the prosecution;
of this war we are attaining; temper- |
ance. From the time war was dc-j
clared, the arrests for drunkenness
in the city of New York steadily de
creased until in August they reached'
the unprecedented low ligure of 969 \
for the entire month.
The psychopatic ward of Bellevuej
has had fewer patients in the last
six months than during: any similar
period in its history. Jn November,;
1917, the Kings County Hospital was,
sheltering less than half its accus- j
totned quota of alcoholic patients.
I could go on ad lib. with corrobor- ;
ative figures that are before me. The i
steward of one of the big New York!
clubs said to me disgustedly:
"There's practically no drinking any
more at all, not what you'd really
call drinkin.' It's all happened since
we got into the war. I don't know
what's the matter with the boys.
They don't seem to have the heart
for the drinkin' that they used to
have, an' the place is that sober an'
quiet .after midnight you'd think
the club was nothin' but a library
where no talkin' is allowed."
Urged on by the necessity for
physical and mental alertness that
this war demands, we are by our
conduct converting the spirit of tem
perance into a tradition of sobriety
that will do Its part in establishing
us as a great people.—William S.
McNutt in Cfellier's Weekly.
HAVE A PUNCH TO 'EM
Suggestions as to how Germany
should be treated have recently been
set forth by the Marquis of Lans
downe. But the real rules for the
proper treatment under the circum
stances have been laid down for {ill
time by the Marquis of Queensbury.
—From Collier's Weekly.
THE MARCHING MEN
The brown lads, the brave lads go
marching down the street:
It sets one's head a-whirling—the
motion of their feet!
Their legs go swinging, swinging, in
row on rhythmic row,
As down the street, down theh street
the marching soldiers go.
The yare stepping, stepping, step
ping as if they hummed a song
That soon must burst in thunder a
mighty million strong. * • • '
The Kaiser, oh. the Kaiser, if ho had
seen this hour
When first he dreamed a van
quished world lay sprawled be
neath his power,
Had taken thought, had taken
thought, and then, had paused
again
Before he roused the valor of all
these marching men!
• —Harry Kemp in the New York In
dependent.
THE EASY WAY
The crown prince to the Kaiser said:
"Our front U 1 getting jagged.
Oh, say, shall we retreat again,
and run the Allies ragged?"
"Aeli, nonsense!" said tlie Kaiser
then. "Now what's the use of
flying,
When we can win more victories
by keeping up our lying."
\ —Kansas City Star.
DECEMBER 31, 1917.
11 EDITORIAL COMMENT
Now that a few mutinous soldiers
, have been hanged, what's the mat
| ter with a cheerful execution of a
' German .spy or two?— Chicago Her
ald.
j Roumania, deserted by the Rus
j ians, registered its opposition to a
I separate peace, but decided that it
| didn't want a separate war.—Seattle
i Post-intelligencer.
The fact that British bulldog ten
acity won Jerusalem after 700 years
I makes Germany's peace feelers seem
a trifle premature.—Philadelphia
j North American.
XT. S. Boys "over there" are re
j ported to be in fighting form. The
| nets will continue to be encouraging
: as long as France lias a gun to give
! us.—Philadelphia North American.
The Government, it is said, is
j planning to take charge of German
. patents. With a view, probably, to
j taking charge of the German royalty
: eventually. - Nashville Southern
I Lumberman.
Emma Goldman complains that
Hie Draft L.a\v encroaches on relig
ious liberty. This mirst hurt Kmma,
who never was known to encroach
on anything religious.—Philadelphia
North American.
For forty years the German autoc
racy has refused to let the German
people rule themselves and at the
same time constantly assured them
they ought to rule the rest of the
world.—Chicago Herald.
Even the Kaiser's- best friends in
Congress are willing to declare war
on .Turkey and Bulgaria. The Bul
garian and Turkish vote isn't impor
tant.— Emporia Gazette.
OUR DAILY LAUGH
MADE IN
j&SKt f GERMANY.
Mother
What do you
Iy \\ mean by bcat
<§4 In ff your little
A* sistcr and ,alc "
~w| ir >K her candy
Jot away from her.
xfr. '-Pwi Small Son—l
fipf ' /.■ ? was fighting her
T f it iy' IgH for my very ex-
W istene'e and the
VT J candy I took
toT Indemnity.
AND GOT fjkjtt*,,. Jg&4
COLD FEET. //
I sent my Y \*** /
daughter to a s
cooking school F*~ Jl A
to tit her for / i
marriage. I J yl*'' ■■
Was tho ex- I 1 \ W
reriment a sue- V \ \
cess? /\ } '
No. the roan \ M
she was en- /Wr \\ il
gaged to found //II Uil
It out.
STVIJSH.
fSure thing.
We had to stand
up and eat tha
refreshments In
a most uncom
fortable and
awkward man*
CONFLICTING yT>
OPINIONS.
The CorpoM.l At." \ftTy
—How did the
examining sur
geon come to fSM**
pass a soft I Itt|T7 n I
headed thing ljp |n| jdJ]
The Rookie — ' mIF/
Soft headed, eh. jCLi-if
(reant said my ' I I .
head was solid I IJ ff
f&nting (Efyal
While you can still get scrapple or
ponhaus, as we know it better, and
country ham Is procurable, the war
seems to have driven from the cards
of Harrisburg"s hotels and restau
rants, its cafes and quick I'incheries
some of the things we were brought
up on like spare ribs, stewed kidney
and mush, while it is very rarely
that you can pet macaroni prepared
in the Italian style, open-faced apple
pie dusted almost brown with cinna
mon and Juniata terrapin. Home
made mince meat has not been In the
markets for a long time and we
doubt whether the farmers' wives
are making smearcase any more.
There used to be times when spare
ribs could be had in almost any eat
ing place Wednesday and Satur
days and stewed kidney twenty years
ago was a fine dish and In demand
until the aromatic beef stew came
along to chase It into the class with
pickled pigs' feet. And who does not
recall the Fridays when the tables of
almost any eating place showed the
Russ influence in macaroni or spa
gettl cooked in that inimitable Italian
way, while the hotels that catered
to the country trade, especially dur
ing court week used to make a spe
cialty of boiled mush, which was also
in vogue for a long time on winter
mornings at the Commonwealth. As
for that apple pie the men behind
the counters say that people won't
pay a dime for a cut and that they
have to have fifty cents for each pie.
It Is almost as sorrowful as the sit
uation that has arisen in the matter
of the Juniata red leg. In the days
of "Boy" Russ and Pete Gonelli, no
December or January was compete
without the terrapin sign being dis
played, and now, you have to keep
your eyes and ears open for the word
that some one has bought some of
the "fresh water turtles" or else go
and regale yourself on snapper. Of
I a truth, the end of the war year is
I bringing many changes in Harris-
I burg diet. What with oyster stews
costing thirty and thirty-five cents;
sweitzer sandwiches fifteen and no
. lirnburger, and not even a sprlng
alie to he had, we are forced to wish
! that the rabbit season had lasted
longer.
. . .
Our friend the lunch counterman
probably feels about as badly over it
as we do because he breaks out now
and then with some Sicilian maledic
tions against the men who protest
that the orders of sauerkraut are so
small that it takes two to make a
portion such as they used to serve
last winter. Me blames the farmers
whom the says sells their cabbage to
the men who "buy up queek an'
much." It don't pay any more to
have sauerkraut he says and pre
dicts the deadt'ul time when it will
follow other things to the "special
dish" class reserved for high days
and holidays. He says that the people
miss a lot by not oating frankfurters
and he tells you that Harrisburg
folks don't know the good kinds of
fish to be had. He slices the inside
of the sandwich so thin that he is al
most ashamed, but ho confides to you
that his troubles are nothing to hlr
white coated pal at the bar when
the "schooner" and the "cannon
ball" have departed never to return
and where the "stein" holds about
two-thirds of what it used to con
tain two years ago. "Barkeep he
havd much argue," is his description
of the tribulations of the feilow who
has the vanishing job.
• • *
It may be remarked in passing
that recent events in the war have
caused a considerable difference in
the demeanor of the men from the
land of the goulash and that ho no
i longer has much to say to the Ital
i ians either here or at Steelton. It
! may be said that the men who came
here from Russia are now very much
intent upon their own business anil
are manifesting an eagerness to get
out of military service. In fact, the
breakdown of the Russian govern
ment was followed very promptly
by declarations that the suddenly
very dear beloved Russia was out
of the war and that there was no
reason why her sons should be called
on to serve. The Slav, Hungarian.
Croat and other racial segment of
the Austrian empire have if anything
grown more reticent since the dec
laration against Austria and in many
I instances appear to be keeping out.
' of the way of trouble. It is rather ap
parent that some of them are glad
they are here and that they mean to
stay. On the other hand some odd
situations have arisen in regard to
Austrians. In a number of instances
it has been reported that men sum
moned for the draft bluntly declared
themselves enemy aliens. When ask
ed all things being equal, whether
in'event of this country being in
vaded they would bear arms against
Austria or Germany they have given
the surprising reply that they had
to take oaths when they left military
service or their home province that
they would not bear arms against
the land of their birth.
• • *
Some rather startling statements
are made to the attorneys who have
been giving up hours day after day
to advise the men of draft age how
to fill out their questionnaires and
the number of aliens who frankl>
have no wish to shoulder a gun tin
der anv circumstances, but who want
to get' all the benefits of residence
here without sacrifice in return is as
tonishing. However, one of the most
brutallv frank statements was made
by a stalwart Slav who replied to
the first question after giving his
name and address, with -Now.
meester, get me out."
1 WELL KNOWN PEOPLE
—John F. Short, the Cleared ed
itor, has been named on the food
administration for his county.
—Chester E. Albright, who is a
Northumberland countian, is work
ing on plans to house the thousands
of workers at Hog Island.
Dr F.lwood F. Kirby, well
known here, is the new consulting
surgeon to the Eastern penitentiary.
H. W. Dodd, head of the coun
ty superintendents department of the
State Educational Association, comes
from Allentown.
Victor H. Wleand. former sher
iff of I.ehlgh. Is seriously UJL He is
president of the Allentown Fair As
sociation.
H. A. Acker, Reading fnel ad
ministrator. had to threaten arrests
before some merchants would ex
tinguish electric signs.
1 DO YOU KNOW ~~|
Hint Harrisburg had more
money distributed tn Christmas
savings than ever before?
HISTORIC HAIUUSBCRG
To-morrow marks the beginning
of the iSSd year of Dauphin county.
The act erecting it was passed in
1785.
LABOR NOTES
The average pay of women typista
in England is $lO per week.
International Boilermakers' Untor
has signed an agreement with th<
Missouri, Oklahoma and Quit Rail,
road.