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Troth and Right -God and our CoontrjY
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BLOOMSBURG. COLUMBIA COUNTY, PA., WEDNESDAY, JUNE 21, 1865.
NUMBER 35. :
III. H IIIIHiUlK
THE STAR OF THE NORTH
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I ESTERED T DEHfJ.
I'm the last to complain, "
But I don't like to see
So many far fingers
Directed to rr.e'.
Atid no more do ! like4
Thy whispers to hear ;
Have thrown in myeRr,
For, though I'm a bachelor why 1 should be
Pestered. to death, T really can't see.
I'm the last to complain, . ,
Bnt in truth I mnM say
That from pleasant 'lis far,
On St. Valentine's dav,
t " To receive nfgh a score
Of verses and print,
UiuMtating horrors '
. Aud teeming with hints.
Ftr '.hough I'm a bachelor. &c.
I"m theTas! to complain. ,
But I don't think it fair
To he penered to leath
. For a lo -k tf my hair ;
Fnr an autograph, or
An original er.e,
7"o he teased for a son?.
Or be made to converge.
Far, though Im a bacl elur, &c.
I'm the last to complain.
Hut I'd tike to hare known'
That J wih aM yonng ladies
on'd leave me alone t .
Kep their tongues and their eyes
To themselves nnd receive
' Sincerely the thanks
Of one they'll relieve. -For.
thongh I'm a bachelor, truly PI! be
Thankful if ladies w ill keep 'way from me.
Saccrss fn lift. '
A shrewd, intelligent mm of the world,
and one, too, who ha been eminently snc
ceslnl for from a -mall beginning he had
risen to the highest place in the department
10 which he was attached, and mnde the
fortune ol his whole family ; brothers, sons
and nephews, a well as his own once
said to tne : .
"The longer I live the more convinced I
am that over-sensitiveness is a great mistake
in a public mai.
He might have said, in all men who de
sire to six-cHed in life. Now I wish to be
understood that what is expressed here by
.his word ''over sensitiveness, does it not
eitnify over-scrupulousness. Be as scru
' poloos as you will, but do not be over
sensiti' e on the score of pride and vanity,
or dominent egotism. Every successful
man, you may be sure; has had much to
mortify him in the coarse of his career
He has 'borne many rebluffs ; he bas ua
lained many failures. What if men do no'
understand yoi, are not inclined to encour
age yon, and exercise the privilege ol age
or superior poiiion bear with it all.
Jnvenis, your time will come: you i
may tafce . your cnance out ol the world
when you are a little older. Bah ! how
does it hurt you ? "Hard words break no
bones," aith the proverb. Aod they broak
no spirit that is not.of the feeblest. The
world may laugh at your failures what
then? Try. again, and perhaps they will
. not laugh. Try once more, and perhaps it
may be your turn to laugh. ' He who wins
may laugh,' eaitb another proverb. If you
litre theTight stuff in ypo, yoa will cot be
put "down. If we ha ve the right stuff in us,
these failure at the octset are grand mate-
' rials of success. .To the feeble, they are, of
course, tumbling blocks. The wretched
weakling goes po further; he lags behind
and subsides into a life of failure. And so
by this great winnowing process the num
ber ofathleies in the great. Olympic of life
is restricted to a few, and there is a clear 4
vpace in the arena. - '...'
There is scarcely an old man among u-
an old and successful man who will nor
willingly admit that he was made by his
failures, snd tjial what he onqe thought hard
fate was in reality his good fortune. .
And thou, my bright-witted child, who
thinkesl that thou canst carry Parnas3ua by
torm, learn to possess tby soul in patience.
If. success were to crown thy efforts no w,
where would be the great .success of the
It is the fcrave resolution lo "do better
next time," that lays the substrata of all
real greatness. Many a promising reputa
tion has been permanently destroyed by
arly success. -The good sap runs out from
lha trunk into feeble offshots of suckers.
The bard discipline of the knife is wanted.
I repeat that it is not pleam ; bat when
thoa fselest the sharpness of the edge, think
that all who have qpma before thee ha?8
teen lacerated in lilt e manner. V
A Christian had better go to any place of
anssszasnt than" to go homa whining be
cari he caa't zi.
THE NIXE PORTRAITS.
BT N EI. 1.1 E METTLE.
It was a beautiful morning in the 'month
of August. An old man lay on his death
bed ;the morning sunbeams fell upon his
eray hair, making it look, like threads of
purest silver; a calm peaceful expression
spread over bis countenance, showing that
he was ready to go hence with Azreal, to
wander in the beaa'iful land "beyond the
blue.' . The old man was an artist, and now
hung cp in his room, where his eyes could
Gaze upon them, .were nine portraits, heads
of females ; and, strange to say, they were
the most hideous," locking por:raits that
could be painted. It seemed indeed as if
the old man had tried to make each one
more hideous than the other; but, having
made the first so perfectly infernal looking,
j the others could not be worse, so all were
The old man had sent for his two young
est sons, and they were now approaching
the room where their father lay anxiously
awaiting them. As they entered and stood
by the bedside, the old man's lips moved
in prayer; fien raising his hands, he laid
them in blessings upon their heads
''My son Henrick, and you, Franz, I have
senl to tell you my last wishes. I know
your brothers and histers are well provided
for; now there is not enough here for two,
but abun jan ly enough for one. Cast your
eyes oppnsi ts, and you behold nine por
traits ; now, whichever will marry a person
resembling those pictures shall have what
is left ; the other must work for himself.
The marriage must take place before a
twelve month; and if, at the end of that
time, you are both unmarried, lh properly
Koes to the hospital Society; but if either
of you marry before that time, with one
who does no- resemMe thoe portraits, then
the property goes to the unmarried . one. I
The vocng men gazed wiih horror upon
:he pictures before therr, and thooght the
hospital Society would claim the estate;
for, to put all that hideousness toge'.her, and
t form a whole, and rrmry the perpon resem
bling it, was not to be thought of; for cer
tainly no ma person could be found.
Six months after the singular scene we
have mentioned above transpired, the two
brothers were sitting in the same room :he
niiie por'raiti are still hanjjirj; :her. !
"What horrid Icokinj gorgons, Henrick !
See what monsters. No. one appars ith
eyes set in her forehead instead of under it.';
"Yes, Franz; but what beautiful eyas they
are, Ihonn'n," said he, to himse'f. '
"And look at No. two ; her forehead is
I.injer than the rest of her whole face.
Bah, Henrick, you may keep the estaie ;
I shall marry Trnchden next Sunday. It is
all settled between os. Her father will give
us enough to live upon, even elegantly ; so
my dear broth er, yon have the estate, and
can rrarry your Franla the next Sunday, if
"Yes," said Henrick, (for there wa noth
ing said about the remaining unmairied one
marrying or not marrying,) "so, Go3 bless
you, my dear brother, and may your mar
riage be a happy one,-for you deserve it,
dear Franz "
Franz went out, and Henrick began to this question for some time, at last answer
examine the nine portraits more carefully ed as follows : This puts me in mind of a
than before. j Frenchman, who, having heated a poker
At the lime appointed Franz was married, red hot, ran furiously into the street, and
and he and his bride went on a bridal tour, addressing the first Englishmen he met
and he wa happr. Meanwhile Henrick . there
had studied the pictures. " J "Hah ! Monsieur ,voalez-vous give the
"I think," soliloquizod he, r:that I have plaisir, de satisfaction, let me run this po
found my father's secret ; let me see. No. ker.only one foot into your body ?"
1, Beautiful blue eyes, large and lustrous. "My body!" replied the Englishmen:
No. 2, Fair, high open fcrehead. No. 3, "what do yoa mean?"
Beautifully arched eyebrows, and long eye
lashes No.4, Grecian nose, thin pink nos
irils. No. 5, Splendid mouth. No. 6, Teeth
small and even, and like pearl. No. 7,
Round, small, dimpled chin. No. 8, Round
face, beautiful complexion. Ni. D, f.cng,
golden corls, splendid head."
"So each portrait contains one beautiful
feature, but so placed among .the deformi
ties as to be almost lost. I will paint a pic
ture from them and see how it will look."
He set himself to work, and, lo ! when
the picture wis finished, whom did it re
semble? Why, Truchden : the bride of
Franz; yes there was the same blue eyes,
the beautiful brow, everything that belong
ed-to her. , .
"Ah, Fran:!, my brother, you have won
the estate, and ! must henceforth give np
all thoughts of my dear Franla and become
So Henrick shut up the house and went
away. When Franz returned he was, sur
prised to learn his brother had gone ; he
searched be enquired, lie advertised for him,
but all to no purpose
"Ah," said he to his wife, "those horrid
pictures must have been the cause; I will
have them removed this day. You have
never seen them; come with roe and I will
show you what a beautiful bride we were
They went t the house, and to the room
where the portraits were hung with their
faces to the wall. '
"Why, here are ten pictures, Franz; you
said there wen) but nine." '
. ."Ten ! So there 'are; let's see."
Hs turned them, and what was their as
tonishment to behold the counterpart ol
"My poor biother, so he left rne a token
of remembmrce, did be. I wish I knew
where hs was; bnt see, dear wife, are they
not horrid ?" '
"Now, dear -Fraoz. I think year father
had some good reason for this ; there is
some hidden meaning here. Let me find
it out. Give me leave to come here every
day for one month aod see if I do not find
"Well, dear, yon may come, but f shall
take yonr piclore away from these gorgons."
"Trnchden came every day and studied
the portraits as Henrick had done, but with
. "I see, I see, now; so this is !he secret,
is it? Well, to be sure. No. I, wavy
brown hair'but so dreadfully disarranged.
No. 2, small face, except the forehead,
which is almost twice Joo big for it. No. 3,
cunning little chin, but such great thick lips,
that it almost hides it. No. 4, splendid col
ored eyebrows and lashes to match the hair.
No. 5, brown eyes. No. 6, fair brow. No.l
7, pert little turn-up nose ; face drawn one
side. No. 8, round kissable lips but puffy
cheeks. No. 9, splendid head but oh, how
the face deforms it. Now I'll see what all
She then seated herself and began work
ing a picture from her notes. She worked
until dark, then went home.
"What success, Trnchden?"
"Very good, Franz; for. ia one week
yon shall judge for yourself."
Every morning Trnchden went to her
work, and at last finished the picture.
"Why, it's Franla; my cousin. Henrick's
bethrothed. Oh, I wish Henrick was here
"So he is, dear wife ; he came about an
hour ago, but what is this? Franla's pic
"Yes. Franz, that is the secret of the nine "
"How," exclaimed Henrick, "did you
paint that picture from those?"
"Well, then, the vine ccnlains two secrets,
for I painted yours from them ; and you
was married, Franz, before the twelve
months ; so "
"There, there, no more, Henrick'; you
just go and bring Franla here, and we'll all
live together and will keep the nine pic
tures as oor most valued treasures."
"And what will yon do with the other
two?" said the wife of Franz.
"Oh, we'll hang one up at each end Gf
So the thins; was settled, and the two
brothers lived there ia pbaceand happiness,
and the portraits were handed down from
generation to generation; and often, as the
yule log burns upon ihe hearth, is told the
story ot the nine portraits.
Dr. F&ankmn's peculiar talent was thut
of illustrating snbjic!s by opposite anec- I
.1 -. ' i. . i r . i I
ui'ip. urn ue va aeiii neio iui i:ie
province of Pennsylvania he wa's fr
quenily applied to by the ministry for his
opinion respecting the operation of the
stamp act ; but his answer was uniformly
the same, "that the people of America
would never bmit to it." After news ol
the destruction of the stamp papers had ar
rived in England, the miniitry again sent
for the doctor to consult with ; and in conclu
sion offered this proposal, "that if the A
mericans would engage to pay the damage
done in the destruction of the stamped pa
per, &c. the parliament would then repeal
the act." The doctor, having paused upon
'Vel den, only so far," marking about six
"Are you mad?" returned the other; I tell
you if you don't go about yoor business, Til
knock you down."
"Vel, den," said the Frenchman, soften
ing his voice and manner ; "vil you, my
good sir, only be so obliging as to pay me
for my (rouble and expense of heating this
Remarkable Works. Ninevah was fif
teen miles long, eight wide, and forty miles
round, with a wall one hundred and eight
feet high, and .thick enough for three, chari
ots abrest. Babylon was fifty miles witiiin
the walls, which were seventy feet thick,
and four feet high, with one hundred bra
zen gates. The temple of Diana, at Epbe
sa,wat4our hundred and twenty feet to the
support of the roof. It was a hundred years
in building. The largest of the pyramids is
four hundred and eightty-Dne feet high, and
six hundred and fifty-three on the sides ; its
base covers fifty acres. The stones are
about thirty feet in length and the' layers
are three hundred and eighty. It employed
three hundred and thirty thousand men in
building. The labrynth ia Egypt contains
three hundred chambers and two hundred
and fifty balls. Theb'is, in Egyptj presents
ruins twenty-seven miles round. Athens
was twenty five miles round, and contained
three hundred and fifty thousand citizens,
and four hundred thousand slaves. The
temple of Delbpoi was so rich in donations
that it was plundered of five hundred thou
sand dollars, and Nero carried away from it
two hundred statues. The walls of Kane
were thirteen miles round. L '
"I never betrayed a friend's confidence,"
said tne lady to another, by way of insin
uation. '.'Very true," was the answer, "for yaa
never were entrusted with it."
That mental malady, "oil on the brain,"
at first attacking the citizens of Pennsjl
vania, had proved corvtageous, and spread
nntill it reached the furthermost parts of
our extensive country.
The result was the formation of hondreds
of companies to embark in the problematic
speculation which they expected to solve
by borin&in mother earth, and arriving at
the cin. ion in petroleum. The newspaper
columns teemed with fabnlous statements
in regard to the immense fortunes made by
certain individuals, and immeasurable
quantities of oil that were pouring forth
to enrich the owners of wells or certain
companies, until one would be led to be
lieve that the inside of the earth was an
immehce deposit of grease, which "only
needed to be developed" to remunerate the
speculator. One enthusiastic Pennsjlvanian
who had amassed a fortune by the lease of
land, devised a plan by which he proposed
to torn this account by manufacturing soap
for the whole world, with which he would
wash out the national debt; The peculiar
order attached to petroleum, we have no
doubt, would prove a favorite of the snob
ocracy who render themselves offensive by
the use of musk, and place this soap upon
thousands of toilet-tables.
It was jn the midst of the excitement
that Stephen Harris was. attacked by the
aforementioned disease. How he caught
ii is not definitely known ; but he was ex
posed in a variety of ways, by the conver
sation of acquaintances who dropped in lo
see him at his effice; the exaggerated and
highly colored accounts in the newspapers;
the veroose advertisemeeta of the various
companies forming, announcing shares for
sale, ran ging in value from fifty cents to
one hundred dollars ; and there was scarcely
a day but that he received direct appeals
to ''lake block," by circulars which he re
ceived through the Tost Office.
These statements figured imrnenre for
tunes, on paper and showed she prospec
tive receipts, with all the plausibility and
guessing abi!ity,of a sharp Yankee.
-They turned many an old head ; and
snoum we express any asiontment inai a
comparatively young man like Stephen
Harris should not have fallen in with the
tide, and imagined a forune made alter the
manner of the crpation of fairies?
He was not oil his feet, beyond his depth
i in the swift running current ; his mind was
not lull made up ; he hesitated; he was at
the even balance when the weight of infia
etce might turn the scale either way.
It was in jijt spch a mood as this that
S f phen Harris left his office and walked
thoughtfully towards his home where his
wife and little boy and girl were awaiting
his coming to partake with them the even
ing meat. He was a man of thirty, engaged
'. . . .. fn a I l r r . rl i n! n -f k!a e . n n u rt '1
tmn. emD ovinff some twentv men. and was t
, i --cs J ' j
rearlv adding o a comfortably large capital, i
In some instances, "leave the shop behind
, J . . , i. t
pleasure in lalk;ng over his place and busi
v . i
ness matters witrt nis wiie. one was me t
, , . . !
oaugnter ot a n:gaiy-success;ui mercnani,
and partook from him many exce lient ideas
of business ; and her husband found that he
possessed not only an excellent housekeeper I
bnt a good business counselor ; and as Mr. j
Harris resolved the matter in his mind, and j
presented to himself the rjros and cons he
UC V. IUCU IU UlUdtl Hit? CUWjTiWI IIP Ml HMCp
and let the result of their "talk" decide
whether he should invest So. 009 in a new
company just forming, that apparently offer
ed extraordinary inducements to khare-liold
His thoughts xere so much occupied that
his customary salutes to his wife aod chil
dren were performed with a coolness that
was not his wont. Mrs. Harris .noted it,
bat made no remark, being satisfied in her
mind of the subject ol his thoughts. The
supper was dispatched wi'hoat much inter
rupting conversation, after which Mr Harris
dropped back in his chair, and, stroking his
beard with one hand, said:
"Wile, Brown and Strong and half a
dozen others have been in the office this af
ternoon urgingme to take stock in the green
back International Petroleum and Mining
Company. They are quite confident of
success, and are all going to invest. I told
them I would decide in the morning, and I
wmt to talk the matter over with you, and
let the renlt we arrive at decide the ques
tion. For ray part, I don't see how I can
miss it much when I follow the example of
such uniformly successful men as Brown
Then the balance tipped down a little
toward buying oil stock.
Mrs. Harris smiled, and then her face re
sumed its grave look, showing that she
considered the question of some weight.
' How much do yoa think of investing,
Stephen ?" she asked.
You see I have about what I want to con
duct my business easy, and something like
five thousand dollars which I consider
"Now," said he, "I am going to tell you
what I think about it.. ,Yoa mustn't inter
rupt me ; for if you do-yoa will displease
the court, and subject yourself to its dis
pleasure." .At which Mr. Harris smiled grimly.
"Are you willing to loose five thousand
This question took him rather back, bat
he summered out "Wio why, of course
coarse not,"and woaldhare contined had
not his wife jnst put her finger warningly
upon her lips. "
"Of comse ;you must know tharif yen
venture this fie thousand dollar yon run
the risk of losin? it. It's' a sort of camb
,ing. yoo roar wjn ,Brgeiyj but yon stand a
much greater chance of losing. 'Von have
always said that it was your ambition to
make good provision for Id age and your
children. The loss of this money now
would be a great pnllback. You place
great reliance on the jadgment of Brown
and Strong. I have often heard my father
say that they were what business men call
"sharp" and I can recollect when I was a
school girl that these same men got a great
many into speculations in buying some
Western land, a c :ty land out on paper
only, and it turned out that the land was so
valueless that it would not pay the taxes
upon it. They averted public indignation
by showing that they were deceived them
selves, and that they had lost money by
the operation as well. My father said at
the time that he was well enough satisfied
that they did not lose one cent, but made
large sums out of their dupes ; they had so
much of the land giren to them for selling
a given qnatiti'y and took gor.d care to get
all cfl their hands arid the. money into their
pockets, and in them I do not see the dis
interested stock-takers t hit you do. I think
that they are in collusion wiih'New York
brokers from whr-m they receive a certain
per cent, in stock for all lhey sell, and then,
when the stock has reached its zenith, they
will sell out."
Mr. Harris twisted nervously in his chair,
hitched from side to side, and ran- his fin
gers through his hair; he began to open his
eyes a little; the motives of Messrs. Strong
and Brown did not look quite so disinterested
in his eyes, there did eeem to be a little
bit of personal aggrandizement in the mat
ter, they did seem to have a single eye to
"My father always said, 'nothing vcn
tcre nothing have,' if you expest to reap
you must sow, and yna have :o wait from
seed lime till harvest to get a crop I have
often thought that you might increase your
business, and thus increase your income,
be-ides conferring a benefit to the place by
the employment of more men, and the
disbursement of more money in the neigh
borhood." "B'H how am I going to do this ?" broke
Mr. Harris, forgetting his pledge not to
interropi. "My manufactures now are
full up to my sale-."'
"To be sure," said Mr-. flarri, "yon
now supply the market as far as your
j manufacture ars known, pr;neipa!!y in two
or three States, but there is an immense
field as yet comparatively untouched ; now
I have to propose that yon rik five Uundred
instead of five thousand dollars, in an at
tempt to insrease your business, and I think
you will find that you can employ your
looe change, as you call it, to advantage.,"
Mr Harris cotinced at some lenti de-
tailing her ideas, until at l-ngth he declared
i that be was beat by the "fair lawyer who
took the opposite of the question."
and their confreres the
he had decided not to
next morning lhat
invest in o'l-tock
, . , . .
as he intended to increase his business
They didn't see "bow under the sun he
cosli do this."
A few weeks after our Tit;i to Mr. 'Har
ris's house, the subjects of our sketch were
assembled in their sitting-room busily en
' gaged. Mrs. Harris was folding and pLciug
i in envelopes circulars illustrating and des
! cribing the articles manufactured by her
l husband, while he was directing them from
a Commercial Report to that class o
sons who delt in or could employ to ad
vantage his inventions. The venerable
postmaster opened his eyes and mouth in
unison, at the quantities cf circn'ars that
Stephen Harris poured into his office, and
his call for pos'age-jtamps was so great
that the official remarked to his worthy
j spouse that "if every oie bought as many
s:aaips as Steve Harris, the overnmei t
would soon be able to pay off the national
des;. " Shortly after, Mr. Harris's receipts
j of letters began to increase week by week,
grauua.iy tne numoer ol men in nis emioy
increaed, end it began to be remarked that,
"Sieve Harris had struck oil !"
Time passed on, and he persis'ed in for
warding circulars, and inserting advertise
ments in the leading papers, until-the sum
which he had expended would have fright
ened him at the outset, but the reult hsd
proven perfectly satisfactory, as persistent
and judicione advertising ever will.
"Wife," said Mr. Harris, as he returned
from the post-office oue evening, and threw
into her lap a number of letters containing
several large orders, "they say up to the
office to-night that the Greenback and In
ternational Oil an Mining Company has
gone op, and is not worth ten cents on a
dollar and that it caused some failures in
this State, and will affect some seriously
here, among them young Rowland the gro
cer." "I am real sorry," said Mrs. Harris, as
she though: what might have been, "they
are young folks, and it will be hard upon
them I suppose that Strong and Brawn
haven't any of the stock on their hands."
"Oh, not they! Brown congratulates me
this evening on the increase of my busi
ness, and said, "by tha way, Harris, you
were a lucky fellow not to go into that oil
speculation. Strong and I thought we'd
get out of the thing locky Weren't we, my
"The land speculation repeated."
"Yes j just as yna prophesied; and I have
learned the lesson that one can 'strike oil'
as well at home," or in his legitimate busi
ness, as in Pennsylvania, or by investment
of moa'jy ia ttneertain speculations."
A Ghost Story.
In all ages, persons of weak intellect'
have believed in apparitions; yet we may
confidently affirm lhat stories of ghosts are
mistakes, or impositions, and that they may
always be detected by a proper exercise of
the mental faculty. In all relations of this
kind there is manifestlyan endeavor lo make
the even's as supernatural as possible, to
prevent the suspicion of trick, and to si
lence all objections which might be mac"e
to their credibility. In compliance with
this custom we will recount a ghost Mory,
which seems to posiess all the requisites.
At a town in the West of England twenty
four persons were accustomed to assemble
once a week, to drink, smoke tobacco, and
talk politics. Like the Academy of Rubens,
at Antwerp, each member ha'd his peculiar
chair, and the president's was more elevat
ed than the rest. As one of the members
had been in a dying state for some time,
his chair, while he. was absent remained
When the club met on the tisnal night,
inquiries were naturally made after their
associate. As he lived in the adjoining
house, a particular friend went to inquire
after him, and returned with the melan
choly intelligence that he could not survive
the night. This threw a gloom on the com
pany, and all efforts lo turn the conversa
tion from the sad subject before them were
ineffectual. About midnight the door open
ed, and the form, in white, of the dead
man, walked into the room, and tcok his
seat in his accustomed chair. There lie
remained in silence, and in silence was he
gazed at. The apparition continued a suf
ficient time in the chair to assure all who
were present of the reality of the vision.
At length le arose, and stalked towards the
door, which he opened, as if living ; went
out, and shut the door after him. After a
panse, some one, at las?, had the resolution
to say : "If only one of us had seen this he
would not have been believed : but it is
impossible so many of us can have been
deceived." The company, by degrees, re
covered their speech, and '.he whole con
vention, as may be imagined, was upon the
dreadful object which had engaged their
attention. They broke up and went home.
In the morning inquiry was made after
! their sick friend. It was answered by an
account of his death, which happened near
ly about ihe time of his appearance in the
club room. There could be little doubt be
fore ; but, now, nothing could be more cer
tain han the reality of the apparition,
which had been simulianeoukly seen by so
many persons I; is unnecessary to fay that
such a story spread over the country, and
fonnd credit even from infidels ; for in this
case a!l reasoning became superfluous, when
opposed to a plain fact, attested, by iLree-and-iwenty
wi;nese. To asert the doc
trine r.f tie fixed laws ol nature was ridic
ulous, when there were so many people ol
credit to prove that they might be unfixed.
Years rolled on, and the story was almost
One of the club was an apothecary. In
the course of his practice he was called to
an old woman, whose business it was to
attend sick persons. She told him she
could leave the world with a quiet con
science, but for one thing, which lay upon
her mind. "Do yon not remember Mr. ,
whose ghost had been so much talked r.f ?
I wa hi nurse. On lht night of his death
I left his room for something 1 wanted. 1
am sure I had not been absent long ; but at
my reiurti I found the bed without my pa
tient ! He was delirious, and I feared that
he had thrown himself out of the window.
I was so frightened that I had no power to
6!ir ; but. after so'ne time, to my great ae-
lonishrcent, he en;ered the room, shiveirng,
and his teeth chattering, laid himself down
on the bed, an J died ! Considering my neg
ligence as Ihe cause of his death, I kept
this a secret, for fear of what might be
done to me. Though I conld have comra
dieted all tl.e story of the ghost, I dared not
j do it. I knew, by what had happened, that
it was he himself who had been in the club
room (perhaps recollecting it was the night
of meeting;) but I hope God, and the poor
gentleman's friends, will forgive me, and I
shall die contented."
DrFtxiTioNs.-MAN.-A conglomerate mass
of bair, tobacco smoke, confusion, conceit,
Woman. The waiter, per force, on the
Husband. An instrument constructed to
growl over shirt buuons that "arn't there.".
Wife. A machine made for darning
stockings, making puddings, and sewing on
Father. A being who thrashes the boys,
and won't "fork over" as his olive branch
Mother. A pleasant song; a 6weet
vision of childhood.
Child.-t-A compound of delightful and
Babt An invention for keeping people
awake nights, and lor the aggrandizement
Whrs Pope Clement XIV. (Ganganelli)
ascended the papal chair, the ambassadors,
of the different states waited on bim with
congratulations; when they were introduc
ed they bowed, and he returned the com
pliment by bowing likewise ; the master of
the ceremonies told his holiness he should
uct have returned their salute; "oh, I beg
your pardon," said the good pontiff, "I hare
net been Tepe long enough to forget goad
A Million Dollars. People say "Th
steamer took away a million dollars," just
B COmn!acBBtlv as though a million dollars
could be picked up like dirt. An anonymous
writer remarks lhat few people have any.
more idea what millions, billions and trill
ions are than theyhave of the brogans worn
by the cobblers who inhabit the moon. A
million of silver dollars possesses a va6tnes
thatjis rather startling to a roan who has ne -er
faced such a pile. To count this sum, at.
Ihe rate of one thousand five hundred dol-
lars an hour, and eight hours a day, would ,
require a man nearly three months. If the
said dollars were laid side by side, they
would reach one hundred and thirty-six
miles ; their transportation would require
fourteen wagons carrying two tons each.
If millions become thus overpowering in
their magnitude, what shall we do with still
larger sums ? The seconds in six thousand
years seem almost incalculable, and yet :
they amount lo less than one-fifth of a trill- -ion.
A quadrillion of leaves of paper, each,
of the two hundredth part of an inch in -thickness,
would form a pile of which would
be three hundred times the moonrs distance ,
from the earth. A cannon ball flies swiftly
but were one fired .at the moment that .
one of our National Presidents takes his
seat at the White House, and were it to
continue with an unabated velocity of
twelve hundred feet per second during bis
whole term of office, it would not travel
three million of miles. We never hear ot
the "Wandering Jew:' but we mentally in
qnire,what was the sentence of this punish
ment? Perhaps be was told to wslk the
earth until he cocntcd a trillion. But we
hear somebody say he would soon do that !"
We fear not. Suppose a man to count one
in every second of time, day ana night, with
out stopping to rest, to eat, or to sleep, it
would take him thirty thousand years to
count a trillion, even as the French under
stand the term. As we said before, what a
limited idea men have of the immensity of
numbers! Apropos to the foregoing which
we cut from the San Francisco Murcury, a
gentleman of this city has offered a yocng
lady two hundred dollars for the volunteers
when she shall have succeeded in collect
ng a million of cancelled postage stamps.
Her chance of gaining it may be estimated
by the above circulation.
At a late meeting of the Union League
the following resolutions were presented :
Resolved, That in the opinion of the
League, everybody must and shall have
Resolved, That women shall have their
rights, whether.married, single, widows, or
otherwise, and that the laws of Nature,
which compel beings to be women against
their will, are repugnant to all fundamental
ideas cf justice, and oughflo be abolished.
Resolved, That ail negroes shall have their
rights, and ought, in justice, to be entitled
to while skins and straight hair, as well as
any o'her man. '
Resolved, That Free Lovers, Mormon,
Shakers and soldiers (provided they be not
too old) shall have their rights.
Revived, That contractors, jobbers ant
speculators of all kinds, (provided they be
of the riht political stripe,) shall have the'r
Resolved, That homrrpathis'.s, dydropath
ists, kanesipathists, botanists, steam doc
tors, mesmerizers, and spiritualists and rap
pers shall have their rights.
Resolved, That medical education is a
Resolved, That military education is a
Resolved, That all educatisn is a humbug.
Resolved, That all men are equal in all
kinds ol know'edge.
Re-olcel, That everybody knows as much
about any body 's ele profession as they do
themselves, and a little mere.
Resolved, That everybody knows ai much
about their own business as everybody else
These resolntior.s were nased onani-
) mously, and the meeting adjourned but not
tine die by a jug full.
A Fkcgal Scotch Woman. As a late
minis'er of Dumblane happened to be one
day visiting his fir.ck, along with one of his
elders, they felt extreme hungry, ad on
arriving at the house of Janet , they
aeked for some re.'reshmeuts. Janet speed
ily set before them everything of an eata
ble kind she possessed, which consisted of
oat cakes and butter. This was all the poor
woman had to serve her for some time to
corrle' and he naturally felt some anxiety
for its rapid disappearance. The minister
began conversing pretty freely with Janet,
and asked if she had been to church the
previous Sunday, and if so, whether she
heard the sermon.-
She replied in the affirmative, and, on.
the minister inquiring whittle text was
the said it was the miracle of "The loaes
and the fishes ;" and adJed, still noticing
the gradual disappearance of the cakes and
"'Deed, sir, if ihe multitude had been as
hungry as you and the elder, 1 think there
would have been fewer fragments left!"
Gcss were invented by Swartz, a Ger
man, about 1378, and were brought into
cse by the Venetians in 1385. Cadnon
were invented at an anterior date. They
were used at the battle ol Cressy, in 1346.
In England they were first nsed at the siege
of Berwick 1405. It was not until 1544,
however, that they were cast in England.
They were csed on board of ship by the
Venetians in 1430, and were ia use among
the Turks abont the same time. An artil
lery company was instituted in England, lor
weekly military exercises, ic 1610.
It requires le6 strength of character lo
do a brave act in secret than not to brag of it