0 I- 1 1 - V H J 1 VI'. 11. JAC03T, Publisher. Truth and Right God and our Country. Two Hollas per Annum. VOLUME 15. BLOOMS B UK G. COLUMBIA COUNTY, PA.. WEDNESDAY DECEMBER 9.1863. NUMBER 7. mil TIT PUBLISHED EVERY WBDXESMT BT mi. II. JACOBY, Office en 31 aid St., Ird Square below Market, TEKMS: -Two Dollars pur annum if paid within six months from the time of subscri bing: two dollars and fifty cents if not paid i : . . - . l . '. i. r. , r J wuiiiii nib year. io suocnpuon lanen lor a lens period; than six mouths; no discon tinuance permitted unit alia rrearages are paid, unless at the option of the editor. lhelerms of advertising will be as follows: On square, twelve lines three times, SI 00 Kvtry subsequent insertion, . ... , , 25 One square, three months, ..... ."3 00 Oncyear, , I . ... .-. . ... ... 8 00 CtioUe IJoetrn. THE FALSE LOTE. hi KI NGSWOOD CLARE. I . sight of he starry sky, , . ' In sound of the rushing sea, With beating heart and a lender smile, Did my own true love kiss me. Under the 'solemn sky, Close to (he throbbing sea, V? ith- wordi of love and vows of faith, Did my eu true love kiss me. 1 caze on the same bright sky, I hear llni ripplingea ; I'.u never i cain, on earth or in heaven, "Will rayowu .rue lo kiss me. . . ."' ' . ' - ' 1'rre are the hr!y Mar, ' 'True is the rei!ef-j ea, True are "the thoughts of my heart to htm, ' But my love 13 falsp to me. l!ar it, O Whantrefu? Hear it, O moving sea ! - J Ye are trui to your own eternal laws, B it my love is f&Je to me. -Why fi'OQi! the moonlit ky, V hy h.nl i the raoanina sea Recall the empty dream o! the past, -y hen my love 13 fal.e to me ? "l-.rce to-hi ?:!. O stars ! . Thrill to ru heart, O sea ! !l rr.3y te srnit with a sudden par.g, i ; Mf lovo will cctne back to me r.ilzi!; ar, Emnibns. a nigJit or two since. Klitz, trie renowned magican ami vantrifoqtf st, took a seat in .1 1 omnibcs, containing seven oj eight pas pengers. The coach had only proceeded a rouple of isquares when lhj driver heard tome one rjrclaira - Hold up hold up, I say The hordes stopped and John looked roand smilingly for his passenger, but none appeared. 'iVith an immodest exclamation, he gathered up the reins, and said "get ," Frefy soon some one cried out 'Slop, drirer, stop !" . .jThe driver again stopped, and looking down into the coach inquired what was wanting. The passengers eyed each other as much as to say ' I didn't speak." Again the coach rolled on bat only to be stopped at the next corner by the heartren ding squeaking of a poor rnnover pig. In stantly each head was thrust ?out of the windows to behold the dea'.h strungles of the granter tut no gronter wa to be seen In another rr.inu'e some one exclaimed in a grufl voice , Keep off my toes !" Every one looked around, but in rain, for the man wiU damaged toes. The passen Ers were completely bewildered. At the noxt crossing the coach stopped to take in a lady. Hardly had bhe taken her deal when she exclaimed Let me he keep your hands of! cf roe." ... The gentleman seated next to her, said Tjry innocently : 'I didn't touch yon, madam And the diver looked down and shout ed 'LooK-a-tere, if yon re gentlemen, I'd' , V . , ', , , . . I tracHyounot to take improper liberties ( 1 , j ,, i wilo the lady passengers : it won't do I" j, - t.' 11 , . .. . .! The lady made an observation as thai coach rolled on, bnt she was not under- a t. u j 1 . ' Mood.: The jr had scarcely gone a square-, t , , . farther shii naiinrin wp.ra startled ; at. the cries of aa inlacf Instantly all eyes 1 ,aliinS DPon D8 lhe "V he"pn8 wPin? were fixed -upon a middle-aged gentleman over our miseries. Then through the dark who bad a. carpet-bag on his ,ap. Tbe f and drizzing rain, throngh the groans man blushed and stammered out barely 1 and Prayer" of lhe fal!en men aboot me. 1 inei:igitle-.'Vhat the dace is all this bard a familiar voice close to my side : about V . '., : " . . ;' ; ;. u"Morder !" shouted the boy on the Btep, while three or foir tugged lustily at the airap. ''What is the matter in there V inquired the driver. ' , ;"L!atter enough," replied a gentleman, "iak9 my fare out of this quarter." "Keep yoar hand out of - my pocket, proceeded from some one. , 'I didn't tpeak-al a!!,", gravely replied t!je man with the quarter. : . "Because, sir; no one shall, with inpa l.i'j, Bccnsj " Again the baby is t eard to cry. "Shatr.c I" said some one. - - :'"Whi wfald have thought it!' remarked another, vh i!o a third (Blitz of course) heck the omnibus with a bourse lacgh. TLir.king he hr.d had fun enough, the ven:iiIoqcii t pttid his fare and jamped out of t'oe ornaihes. Scarcely had he reached t'23 Bid-3-walk however, before the driver I erd th3 word "he! d op !" from four dif- fsrent qcartsrs in as many seconds, bat. not 1. pasengei coslJ hi d'. zetn. Filled with iroader he harried on'his way. Blitz is a r?at ic'.'.o-i. A nakca rrcabor-d ia New Oceans taz.es a ecu ty his '.-i:3 v at that he bad been tlrcck the poker. Ii is much more I'iely thai to was street by the rsan with ti3 r.;!:er. : ' ' MY REVENGE. We met in the beginning of the action, I and my enemy, Richard Withers he a reb el, I a Federalist ! he on foot, I mounted. It mailers not why I hated him with the fiercest wrath of my nature. "The heart kr.oweth its own bitterness," and the de tails, while most paiaful 10 me, would be of trifling interest to you. Suffice it that our fend was not a political Oite. For ten years we were closest inmates that the 1 same studies, the tame tastes and the same aims could make us. 1 was the 'elder oi the j two, and stronger physically; comparative ly friendless as the world takes it, and had no near relatives. Young, solitary and vis ionary as we were, it is hard to make you understand what we were to each other. Up to this period of our enstrangement, working together, eating together,, sleeping together, I can safely say that we had not a grief, not a pleasure or a vexation that we did not share with almost a boyish sin- f gle heartedness. But one single day chang ed all. ,Ve rose in the mornina dear friends and lay down amight bitter foes. I was a man of extremes ; I either loved or hated with the whole strength of my hear. The past was forgotten in the present. The ten years ol kindness, of congeniality, ol almost womanly kindness, viere erased as with a sponge We looked each other in the face with angry, searching eyes said but-a few wcrds (oar rage was too deep to be de mo:, straiive) and pared. Then in cry soH t tide I dashed rjiy cler,chnl hand upon the Bible and vowed passionately ; "I may war te:i years, ' Richard1 Withers ! T may wait twenty, thirty, if you will, but sooner or later I swear I shall have my revenge !'" At:d this was the way we met. 1 wo'iuer il he thought cf that day when he laid h:s hand upon my bridle rein and j strangely moved. locked cp at me with hU treacherous blae i The rain was falling still ; b.ut the little eye-. I scarcely think he did, or he could j head upon my breast was gone. He crept r.ot have given me th.il look. He was bean-j away silently in the darkness His uncon litnl as a girl ; indeed, the contrast of Lis ' cioas mission was fulfiiieJ ; he wonlJ not fair, aristocratic face with the regular out- i return at my call. line and red curving bps, to my own rough, I Then I lifted myself with great effort. 1 dark exterior, might have been partly the fcecret of rav former attraction to him. But lhe loreiiess of aa angel il it had been 1 h:s would not-have saved him from ma then There was a pistol in his hand, but ! before he had time to discharge it. I cet at ' him with my sword, and as he line swept; on like a gathering wave, I saw him Hag- ; ger under the blow, throw up his arms and j i go down with the presc Bi'terly as'l hated ' j him the ghastly face haunted me ' the long day through. . You all remember how it was at Freder- ; kksburg. How we crossed the river at the wrong point, and nnder the raking fire cf . the enemy, were so disastrously repulsed. Il was asaJ miFtake, and fatal to many a j brave heart. When ni2hl fell. I lav onon ! the neld among dead and wounded. I was ) comparatively helpless. A ball had ehiv-1 - . . ' ered the cap of my right knee, and my shoulder was laid open wi:h a sabre cut The latter bled profusely ; but by dint of knotting my handkerchief tightly around if, I managed to staunch in a measure. For my knee I could do nothing. Conscious ness did not forsake me ; but from the moans and wails of the men about . me, I judged that others had fared worse than I Poor fellows ! there mas many a mother's darling suffering there. Many of my com rades, lads of eighteeu or twenty, who had never seen a tiight from home until they joined the army, spoiled peta to fortune, manly enough at heart, but children in years and constitution, who had been ned to have every little ache or scratch com passioned with an almost extravagant sym- i pathy there they lay crippled and gushed f 1 1 . 1 : i 1 1 j l.jii. 1 w' j a together some where they had fallen, some 0 1 ' where they had weakly crawled on their , 1 hands and knees and never a woman's ...... v ,uuuu; , u u.u. voice to whisper gentle consolation . , pitchy dark, and a cold miserable r J ' - It was rain was "Wafer I water I water I J am dying with ! thirst if it be but a bw&Uow water? For ; God's sake give rne water !" I recoiled with dismay. It was the voice of my enemy; the voice of Richard Withers. They were once dear to me, those mellow tones ; once the pleasantest music I cared to hear. Do yon think they so softened me now 1 Yon are mistaken : 1 -am candid abont it. Jlj blood :boiled in ray veins when I heard, when I knew he lay so close to me, and I was powerless to withdraw from his detested neighborhood. There was water in ray canteen. 1 had filled it before the last ball came. By stretching my haud I could give him a driak, but I did net raise a finger. .Vengeance was I sureet. I smiled grimly to myself, and said down in my secret heart : ' "Not a drop shall cross bis lipsthoagh he perish. I shall have ray revenge." Do yoa recoil with horror ? Listen, how merciful God was to me. . There was a poor little drummer on the other side, a merry, manly boy of twelve or thtn, the pet and plaything of the regiment. There wjs something of the German ia him, ; be had been with ns from the first, and was reckoned one of the best drummers in the array. - But we would never march to the tap of Charlie's drum eain. He had got a ball ia his longs; and the exposure and fatigue, together with the wcjsd, had made htra light headed. Poor little child ! he crept close to me in the darkness and laid his cheek on my breast. May be he thought it was his own pillow at home ; may be he thought it. poor dar ling, his mother's bosom. God only knows what he thought; but with his hot arm about my neck, and his curly head pressed close to my wVked heart, even then swell ing with bitter hatred of my enemy, he be gan to murmur in his delirium, ' Our Fath er, who art in Heaven." 1 was a rough, bearded man, I had been an orphan for many years: but not too many or too long to forget the simple-hearted prayer ol my childhood the dim vision of that mother's face over which the grass had grown for twenty changing summers. Some thing tender stirred within my hardened heart. It was too dark to see the little lace, but the young lips went on brokenly : 'And forgive us our trespasses as we for give those who trespass against us." It went through ma like a knife sharper than the sabre cut, keener than the ball. God was merciful to me- and this young child was the channel of his mercy. "Forgive us our trespasses aa we forgive those who trespass against us.'' I had never understood the words before If an angel had spokn, it could scarcely hare been more of a revelation. - For the first lime the thouaht that 1 miabt be mor taly wounded, that death meight be "near er than I dreamed, struck me with awe and horror. The text of a long forgo'ten sermon was in ray ear t "It is appointed for all men to die; and after death the judgment." Worse and worse.- What measure of mer cy coold I expect, if the rime wa meted out that I had meted unto my enemy. The tears welled into my eyes, and trickled down my cheeks ; the first that I had shed since by boyhood. I felt scbda.il and : The old bitterness was crusheJ, but n H al- to-ether dead. 'Water water!" moaned Rici4ard With- ers In bis agony, 1 tlracged myself c!oe.r to Mm. tj0ti te praised !" I said with a solemn nPar- "Dick, old boy. enerpy no longer, ('0 e rra'!'? ' 'ra willing and able to ,eIP J"on Drink and be friends " It had been growing lighter-and lighter the east an(i now l was d;iy- Day with ,n anc' daJ wi'hont. In the first gray glim. raer fawn we looked into each others Shast!y ,aCe' for a moment, and then the canteea was at Richard- mouih, and he drar.k a.i only the fevered can drink. I waIcbeJ him mist eyes, leaning up. on m' eIbow forgetting the bandaged . V. ' ,J. Il J . i . ... . , fhoalder. He grasped me with both hands. Blood-stained and palid as it was. his face was ingenuous and beautiful as a child's. "Now let rne speak," he said, panting "You have misjudged nil, Rufus. It was all a mistake ; I found it out af'er we part ed. I meant to have spoken this morning when I grasped our rein, but but" His generosity spared me the ret. The wound my hand had inflicted was yet bleeding in his head ; but for the' blind passion oj the blow it maht have been mor tal. Was vengeance so sweet after alt ? I felt something warm trickling from my shoulder. The day light was gone again bow dark it was ! . "Forgive me, Dick," I murmured, grop ing about for him with my hands." Then I was blind then I was cold as ice then I tumbled downn abyss, and everything was blank. "The crisis is past he will recover said a strange voice' "Thank God ! thank God !" cried a fa miliar one. I opened my eyes. Where am I ? How odd everything was. Rows of beds stretch ing down a long narrow hall, bright with sunshine; and women wearing white caps and peculiar dresses flitting to and fro with noisele-s activity, which, in my fearful weakness, it tired me to watch. My hand lay outside the covers ; it was as shadowy as a skeleton's. What had become of my flesh 1 Was I a child or a man f A body or a spirit? So light and frail did I feel, I began to think I was done with material things altogether, and had been subjected to some refiaii: process, and bnt now awaked to a new existence. Bat did they have beds in the other worlds ? I was look ing lazily al.tho opposite cue, whe i some one took my hand. A face was banding over. I locked up with a beating heart. The golden sunshine was on it on the fair, regular features, aad the red lips .and the kindly bine eye. "Dick !" I gasped, "where Lava yoa been ail these years ?" "Weeks, you mean," S3id Richard with the old smile. "But never mind now." You I are better, dear Rulus yoa will l.ve we shall be happy together again." It was more a woman's voice than a man's, bnt Dick had a tender heart. .fWhsre am I ?" I asked, still hazy. "What's the matter with 'rne V "Hospital, in the first place," said Rich ard. 'Typhus, in the second. You . were taken after that night at Fredericksburg." It broke upon me at once. I remembered that awful night J could never, never for get it again. Weak as a child, I covered my face and buret into tears. Richard was on his knees by ray side at once I was a brute to recall it,', he whispered remorsefuMy. 'Do not think of it, old boy j yon ill ust not excite yourself. It is all . forgotten and forgiven.' I 'Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive j those who trespass against us," I prayed I from my inmost heart. 'Those words have been in your mouth night and ttay, ever tince you were taken,' said my friend. I lay silent, cogitating. Tell me one thing,' I asked, 'are we in the North or South ?" 'North in Philadelphia.' Then you are a prisoner.' I Baid, mourn fully, recalling his principles. 'Not a bit of it.' 'What do you mean ?' Richard laughed. 'I have seen the error of my ways. I have taken the oath of allegiance. When you are strong enough again we shall fight side by side.' ' ' 'And the wound in your head ?' I asked, with emotion, looking up at his bright, handsome face. 'Don't mention it ; it healed up long ago.' ' 'And the little drummer V Richard bowed his heal upon my hand. 'He was loutid dead uprn the field Heaven bies3- him ! They said he died praying, with his mother's name upon his lips. 'ilevere him as an angel !' I whipcr ed, grasping him by the hand. 'But for his dying prayer we had jet been cnetriiss !' A lessen to Preachers. The fo'Iowin extract from the pen cf Edmund Burke, might te given ai a lesson to men who prptend 10 be ministers of the Gospel; but " who ir. stead of preaching Chri'jand 'him crucified.' tun -their, prtl phs imo political rostrums, to dahble in the picl of parti-tan p'rife. "Politics a.d the pulpit are terms that 1 " V T - I ve had a eor.siderabnl tvvlng of my cM be heard .n the church but the healng voice inerar, t!ie rheBmatiz. Th.s er, WasL of Christian charity. The cause of eiil j tcn ,lmosfere is terribul en the constito-hia . irovornrnent au., as little as. religion by The i:erneI) too. was nigh about down sick th.s confus.oa of duties. Thee who quit 0I(8 day . blU we lolh tfik a eooJ o!Mash. not belong to them are foMhe t'reater part IiJNOP.ANT BOTH OF TH2 CIIARACI EK Til FT7 LEAVE AND THK Cl'AK ACTk.'R 7 H KY ASSfMC. Wholly unacquainted with the world in which they ere so fond of meddling, and Inexper ienced in ail its allairs, on which they pro nounce with so much confidence, they have nothing of pclitics but the passions luey excite: Thc Habeas Corpus T. Babingioa Ma- cauly, the great English historian, in speak-j tainty, how many greenbacks there are ing of King James the Second, the tyrant j aflote or how big the public debt is. The whom the English people expelled from Kernel sed he couldn't even lay the fonnda lhe throne in 1688, says : j Phin limbers of his messige until he had "One of his objcs was to obtain a I some fig-rs abont the debt to begin on. repeal cf the habeas corros act w hich he So I told him I would go over and see hated, as it is natural a tyrant should hate Chase an have a talk with him. I tut my the MOST STRINGENT CURB THAT EVER LEGISLATION IMPOSED LTON TYRANNY. The feeling remai ied deeply fixed in his mind to the last, and il appears in the instructions which the drew np, when in exile, for the guidance of his son. But iha habeas corpus act, though passed during the af-cendency of the Whigs, was not more dear to the Whign thai, the Tories. It is, indeed, not wonderful that this great law should be highly prized by all English- men, without distinction of party; for it is a law which, not, by circuitous, but by direct operations, adds to the security ar.d hap- piness of every inhabitant of the realm." We don't think we hated the act more than oar President and Cabinet do at the ' present time. To Spoil a Daughter. Be always telling her how pretty she is. j Instill into her young mind an nndae love for dress. j Allow her to read nothing but works of fiction. Teach her ail the accomplishments, but none of the utilities of life. J Keep her in the darkest ignorance of the ', sympathies of housekeeping. j I nitiate her into the principle that it is vulgar to do anything for herself. i j eirpiigiueu uio tausr, lei ner nave a lady's maid." i Teach her to think she is better than any body, else. Make her think she is sick, when she is net, and let her lie in bea taking medicine, when half an hoar's oat door exercise wol'd compleiely cure her of her laziness. And lastly, having given her such an ed ucation, marry her to a moustachsd gatitle man, who is a clerk with a salary ol 250 a year. A Ladt who has boasted nighty at a din ner party, of the good manners of her U'.lo darling, addressed him thus: 'Charlie ray dear, won't yoa have serr.e beans V 'No,' was the ill-maanered reply of the petulenl cherub. No !' exclaimed the astonished mother, no what ?" No beans,' said the child. VvVfind the Jollwing is the Morenci (Mich) Journal : "We have a devil in our office who has been at the business bat about eight or nine months, and can set his eight thousand cms in eight hours." , ( He must be devi! and no mistake. Why we know a regular "graduate'? who says i: takes him more than eight hours to set one "Em" straight after quarrelling with her. . TUE C0NSCKIPT. He pinned to his coat the firey badge, Red, like the blood of those who had gone When first our country called.for aid, And he said he would follow on. He would go to the battle-field, Like them he would proudly meet the foe, Never to falter, never to yield, Ui.til treason were laid low. "Bnt there are many," he said, "would be Glad in your place to be enrolled," But he cried, "When the land aeks life from Can I pay the debt with gold ? me, Yon starry flag in the air Beneath its folds I could even die ! Who hould fight to maintain it there, If you hold back such as 1 ? "Once," he said, "in my school boy days, Reading ot all our fathers braved, When they dared to face a tyrant's wrath To set free a land enslaved, I wiehed I had lived just then, When men had such gallant work to do ; And, now the chance has come round aain I must make my dreams come true !" So he lelt us all to fn'fill his word The word once uttered in boyish g!e "If foes should threaten my native land, She may loci: hr help 10 me !" And l:e stands in the conscript ranks, Whh as lofty a step and hearinjr high. As becomes a man who's grasped the sword To maintain his rights or die. And I thark God on is left us yet, .One hocest man, valiant and strong, To sliflo down all selfish fear, And kirr.-e'f try to conqor wrong. Thank God Icr one freeman more, S;eacl!at. and calm, and resolute, Who would die in his country's cau?e be lls would call for a "subtitua !'' ;ora 6iC3;.r sl::jes-no. i;i. Washington Nov. 19, 1S3. To the E.IHeri of the Ihibook : Suits : IJ I airt been bizzy since I writ you !at than never a man v.a5. Eesivje", "uned wiskeyli :g, of the very best Old Rye, nnd we.it to bed on it. The next . mornin we loth feit last rate. Tbe Kernel keen- ever got cnyvrhere We have bi?r ;i very hard at work ca the tnesr.ig-?, and such a time as we have ted of it you never did see. StaU'n don't know how meny fcj-irs lis hai got in the field, nor hn-.v rnaoy have been killed or woun ded. Grandfather Welles can't tell how matiy gutitotes he's got, an as for Chae, j he don't purtend to even gue8 for a cer- slate under my arm and started. Soon as 1 went in Chase tuk me by the hand an sed he was rale down rite glad to see me. I lelled him what I wanted, an te sed he 1 would soon have it ready for me, but jest ihen he asked me to go up stairs an see the macheenery an printin presses, and so on, that he had got to make money. He sed , the worst of it was that the michenes was constantly getlin out of order, and be wanted to know if I understood any thing about sich affairs. I tolled him there warnt nothing from squirrel traps to dog churns ' and thrashing macheene3, that Ididn'tkaow j '"m stem to starn. Then he eed I was jest the chap he wanted. Sol went with him, and 1 was perfectly thunderstruck when I saw all the riggin, and fixins, and belts, and shafts, and pulleys, and machen- es all a runnin and whizzin, and buzzin, a fast as they could go. Ses the SeckeUry, "this here raachene runs to payoff Gineral Grant' troops. This one runs to pay off Gineral Meade's troops This one runs for Gineral Banks. This one is now bizzy for General Burnside, and here is this ere one completely broken .down. It is Gineral Gi'Imore's machene !" "Yal,"ses I "Mr. Secketary, do you have a machene forevery Gineral and every army ?'' "Yes," ses hs, "aboot that." . "Wal," ses I, "what do you io aDout tne contracier f ' uu," ses he, "I ain't showeed you them yet. That's in another -ronm ." Se he, "come aiong with me " So I follered. and we went off into ariOiher room. Il was nih about tn limes a? big as the first one, and there Were hundreds cf presses runnin' as fa5l as they cca'i 0. "There," ses he, "if thoe here t machenes were to stop one day, it would J .set all Wall street into a panic. Smetimas i when the belts give out or the bolts break, or the cosl gits short, or paper doa't pit in in tune, there is a good deal of troubil, bnt I've got it so fixed now, that I keep 'em putty well supplied. " Ses I, "Mr. Secketa ry. who is your engineer?'' "Wttl," ses he, "lie's a good trusty man." "3at," fe? I, ''suppose he should bust your tilers, what would Wall street do then ?" "Wal," ees he, ' I never thought of that, bnt I guess ihere ain't eny danger." "Wal," ses 1( j "stpam U mighty onsarlia. Old Auntj Kezlath Wigsleton up in Maine, used to say that the only safe way to run a steam boat was lo take the bilers out, and my opinion is, luai a LUieiuuicui mu vj firmii '. 1 i will bust Dp one didn't seem to Hke this Ust remark renc.i, bct he didn't say anything. Wecumdown 1 stairs putty 8O0Q after, and a feller with a brown linen coat on, nigh aboniall over ink, j brought a hall lot of paper covered over j with figgers, and sed that Mr, Linkin could : l find oat all he wanted to from them. I looked 'em over, but I couldn't make tied nor tail to them. ' Wal'ses I, "perhaps a chap who understands dul ble and twisted entry bookkeeptn' can understand this ere fingering, but I'll bo hanged if I kin " Sea I, "here's seven thirty", and six per cents, j and five per cents, and bonds and socks and ' sartificates, and '98s and '78s 'G8 and 158s' and Lord ki.ows how meny more 8s, until it gets all mixed up so that you can't tell : any thing more about the debt than Stantin j kin tell how many eojers has been killed and wounded. Now," ses I, "the people don't care a straw anything about your cix twenty, or ?our five twentys. All they want to know is jest how much money this ' ere war has cost, and that is ; what Pine ' tryin' to fisger out for em. When eld Gin neral Jackson wanted me to go into Sqnire Biddle's Bank and cifer out how matte's stood I soon did it, but that warn't eny more . comparin to this here affair, , than the j bunch c! elder bushes in Deacon Jenkin's I mcdow is to the Dismal Swamp. I tak the j papers, however, over to Linkin, for it was j the Lest I could do Wen 1 handed them i to the Kernel, tes he, "Majr, does Chase j expect tne to survive al'.er studyin out these j figgcra V "Wal" set; 1, "Kernel, I don'l know, but J 1,'iii.k Chase uv-.nj to be nexf Prci.!en!" The Ksrnel tuk the hint r:t? off; bnt he sed Chase would never bo President, for he war.ipd to be so bad, that he acted all the time a if a bumble hre was Ftirgin him j p.nd that his fiyin round so wonld kill bin; ' off, if p.olhin elsa. We then both so", down I and wect to studyin t'.se fitziterst 1 cifered on my ?kte: r.nJ the Kernel made chalk t rnants on ms nal every time we got cp tc a million of dollars. Pur:y oon the Kernel's eye te;;an to look wilj, and ses he, "Mnj-r, where do wc !ar:d r.?xt? I.- the Lp win upstream or Fidoway-? S!i3 11 go down, sure as thunder. Well, let her rip; file's hecn a sinkirt conrarn for year-." I see at once that t!.e Kernel was fligh'y Chafe's fiers had turned his hod, and he thought he was fiatbotiti asin od the Mis!s?ipji river. Bat he kept on ravin. "?s he, 'Tlaj.?r, knock that uiger off the totv" : Ul8 bo'e he 8 ri!e ,a lhe waT ' i I'0, eri1c! " am t safe to hit a n5??wr 5:1 lb3M da's Stanton will put " 1 .'--.v,. .i,:- mijh! bring the Kernel lo his t-en-es, but it didn't. Ses he, "There it goes majer, ?. z I told you, right cn th.-t snag. That rticcr is to blame br the hull of it." I se-t it was no ue, that the Kernel was nigh about s:ark mad, a::d to I said to hir.i, tes "l, "let's put cp this work to-night, and go to bed " lia didn't want to. but I dragged him eff, an he kept ravin' all the time, "That nigger has ruined ine ! There he comes he is after me yet. As soon as I got the Kernel in bed, I pat a double set of mustard plasters on his feet an then gave him a strong dose of my old remedy, "elder bark tea. I knew that would cure him, if anything on arth. Party soon he sweat began to start, an the gripinin the bowels began. Jest as soon as this took place, it drawed all the disease out of his bead, an the next mornin he was as bright a? new dimes, used to be when there was sich things. The fust thing the Kernel sed to me in the mornin was, 6es he, "Majer I hed an awful dream laM niie." Ses I, "What was it ?'' " Wal," ses he, "I dreamt that the nigger had destroyed the Union." "Wal," ses I, "Kernel, you get nearer the truth in your dreams than you gin rally do when you are wide awake. If you will only have another dream, you will see that the Abolishinists have killed, the Union, and that the poor niggers is only the means that they have used to do it." ine ivernei uid nt say nottnn, -out looked j down on the floor and whistled. Finally ; ne tu out oi dis pccitei oneot cnase s new lhe following, among other reasons, why fifty cent shinplasters, an ses he, "Majer, , he should be exempted : "Our early mili kin you tell me why this new currency has j tary education ha- been sadlv; neglected, the alor of nashinajity about it?" "No j aml therefore xve fear we would prove an ses I, "Kernel, I don't see it." "Wal," .es unprofitable soldier. Oar eye-sight is very' he because it is cenied paper!'' "Wal," ses j defective, and at the sound of artillery we I, "Kerne!, now kin you tell me why lhal j are very apt to be troubled with a sudden" fifty cent bbinplaster is like the war ? ' Ses weakness about the knees. We have been he, "Ma-er, you've go; me there." "Wal," j troubled with a eaL;,o of the back, from ees I, "the face is biack, whica means that j our iniancy, and since we have arrived at we are fi-hin to free the nL-ger, and trie j the age of manhood have been sau!y;afiLct-' buck i? red or the blood '.ha price we are ! ed with corns, conscientious scruples in pavir. tor it : ' ! When i sed this the Kernel brought hi1 hand down on the lab il like all possessed, gi? a kick with his foot that sent his s-lipper u) in clear across the room, arid ses he, i "Majer, by the .''Ses I, "Kerne! hold cn. Do yon wa:t to take any more elder bark lea ? ' When 1 f ed this he tapered rite do-vn, and ees he jst as good &s pie, "lei's have some old rye and make friends l uon i oijsct, out ttie .raessige aia t , r finished yet, and the Lord only knows when it will be dan. Yoarn till deth. Mijca Jack Downing. How is it with Yoe ? At a prayer meot- j ing in the church of the village of Sput,k- town, in the State of Maine, a country lad i was noticed by one of the elder d.acon- to hold his head and wriggle in bis seat, while j the tears seemed to start every minute. j A clear case ol repentence thought the old deacon, and he quietly stepped to the . , , . , . ,T R'drt fil the lait. 7i:A in a ihun?r alianiinn ! :Uely inquired : "How is it with vou mv soa ?" The boy looked op, and supposing him to be the sexton, answered : "Oh, very bad, and I want to go octf my j innards is kickin' up a revolmion, and if I ever cat a green currant pie asaio my name I ain't Jeero 3il'.ings The Shadow of Death. We have rarely met with anything mora beautiful than the following which we find in an exchange paper ; "All that live must die. Passing through Nature to Eternity." Men seldom think of the great event of ,eal 01,151 lhe dark shadow falls across inPlt0ffn Pa,n. riiqing forever from their eyes the faces of the loved ones whose liv ing smile was the 6unlight of their exist ence. Death is the great antagonism of life, and the cold thought of the tomb, is the skeleton al all oar feasts. Wedn not want to tet 'trough the dark valley, although its passage may be lead to paradise; and with Charles Lamb, we do not wish to lie down in the mouldy srave, even with kings and princes for our bed fellows. But the fiat of nature is inexorable. There is no appeal or reprieve from the great law that dooms us all to dast. We flourish and fade like the leaves of jLhe forreM, and the fairest flower that blooms and withers in a day has not a frailer hold on life than the mightiet monarch that has ever shook the earth by his footf-tep. Generations of men appear and vanish like the grass, and the countless multitude that swarms the world to-day will to-morrow disappear like the foot prints o.i ihe shore. ' In the beau'ilul drama cf Ion, the instict of immortality, o eloquently rmered by the death dsvated Greek, finds a deepresponse in every thoezhtful soul. When aboot to yi?dd his ycung existence ts a sacrifice to his betrothed, Ciemathe a'cs if they shall r.ct meet aain, lo which he replies : I have tisksd thr.t dreadful question of the hills that look eternal ; of iha s'ars among whose fields cf azure my "raised spirit hath walked in glory. All were dumb. But while I gaze npon their living face, I felt there's something in the love which man tles throegh its beauty that cannot wholly parish. We shall meet again, Cletnanlhe." Captain hast Eillrcgs. . Capt. Ike is row in Pooghkeepsia, and gives to the press of that city some prov erbs and sharp payings. We present them for the edificaticu of Capt. in this vicinity. A man who will chaw tcbacker will drink santy krne ram, and a man who will drink .arty kru?e rum will go la the. devil, and a man who will go tti the devil is mean enorgh to do enyll.ir.g els. :- Yu kan rell just abont what a men will du by heann him tell what he has did. K I am prepared tn say to seven 'rich .men i ont of every ten, rnake the most or ywr V money for it makes the most ov yu. Debt is a bip Eal pot, a big hole whar yu go in, and a small wun whar yn cum out. Man wus kreated a little lower than the Angellf, and he has fceea gelling a little lower ever sine. The most onea.y kritter I ever pcrsued was a bobtail Bull in fli time. When a feller gets a soin' down hill it does seem as though everything had him ' greased for the ockaion. . When yu have serius trubble, do a the' dogs da when they git whipped 20 in se cret and lick your sors till they git well and then look np ancther file. I have known folks whose Caliber was very small, and whose Bore wat very big. There is the difference between rusting out and wearin out ; if you rust oat, when' yu git thru ya aint wu-h a knss, but if ya wear out, what's leftov yu is first rate. A big soul makes a man look like an old fashioned tin lantern with a kandle lit in it. The meanest man I ever uu, was lhe one who stole a . ngar whistle from a nigger baby to swee'ten a kup of rye koflee with. Valid A cotemporary, upon whom an enroling officer recently made a call, gives regard to the taki;:g of human life, and therefore would object to .hooting down one of ocr iellow -citizens, without at least good cace, such as rtlu.ittg to acknowl edge the whoie Union atid the people there of, as united in one common bnnd, all sec- tiiMis being eq with the exception of the Abolitionists, who hall be giver, a fair field to fight out their tiiilic-liies among them selves. We aro or Dosed to lhe earrrin?r of . r ; up?. ..y wepotn?, ar.d must solemnly protest aain.t their tei..g forced upon oar shonl. diers. We are .low cn foot, and would labor utder great disad vantages in a retreat. Taking ail in all, we cannot bat think that )...... si t! rtL. 1 j ''" ' --'". " " w, aa man' havin? al hearl ,he 3'J of his COanI' aS ell as that of his fellow beings, I will omit our name when he throws those slips of paper into the wheel." Never Mixd thk Woodshed" IIt I dear Amelia," said Mr. O. D. Collone, to the yoang lady whose smiles hs was seek ing, "I have long wished for this weet opportunity, bat I hardly dare trust rny- 8el' BOW o speak the deep emotions of my palpitating hearl ; but I declare to yoa, my dear Amelia, that 1 love you most tenderly ; your smiles would shed would shed!" "Never mind the wool .hed, g on witr the pretty talk.'