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.W.U. JACOB!, miisnerV
Truth and Right God and our Country.
Two Doilas per Arnica.
VOLUME 15.
BLOOMS BU KG. COLUMBIA COUNTY, PA., WEDNESDAY OCTOBER 27, 18G3.
NUMBER 1.
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STAR OF THE NORTH
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Cljoice JJoetrn.
" From I ht BnTporJile.) Dtmocrat.
i' nm JIP1SILE TO OCLE ass.
I btive a message, Uncle Ate,
For your own private er;
As 1 cs.n't ge t to Washington,
And as you. won't come here,
I'm forced H put it into type,
With circ Jin.pfcui'u meek ;
As bashful members often print
A speech they dare not speak.
All head is nigh to bursting, Abe,
My very eye-balls ihrob,
To see what! pesky work you raak
ADoat that li'ile.jnh,
Wbicfc. you,! and Bill atid Horace G.
Agreed st nice. in. do,
In lee than "sixty days" from date,
- Some ihiily mouths ago !
W gave ycu heaps of soldiers, Abe,
To tieip jou smite the loe ;
A str'ng of arriers that would reach
From hels to Mexico.
We packed them oil with 6paJes to dig,
And trusty guns to shaot,
With baveracks to j;raee their backs,
, Aud lites aud drums to tool.
Yoa saw these mighty legions, Abe,
And heart) their ma dy tread ;
You counteJ rmsis of living men,
Prsy can you count the dead?
limk o'er the broad' Potomac, Abe,
Virgiuia'ii hills along,
' Their waketul ghosts arebeck'ning yon,
" Tito hundred thousand strong!
.Vave yon severa.1 shillings, Abe,
To pay your Mtt'e dues ;
, E'touuh to buy a dj:en shirts,
And sundry pairs of shoe.
4 We gave yon cai'le, horses, moles,
r AoJ waus full a score ; .
- And several cannon with a voice
Loud as a bull could roar !
-
tNow. what I'm after. Uncle Abe,
- 1 sirap!v to find out
- What yon have .lows with all this 'ere,
And what you've been about !
- li unto Csear yon hive giveu
. At. that i his concern -Then
Mrs. Caesar wants to frnnw
' Wiiai jo j have done with hern 1
1 know f oq're young and handsome,' Abe,
And funiiy a1 jour Poll.
A peer-exated, groat in J high,
A ruler seven loot tall
You're big enough if only smart,"
To manitage all the ganz :
And though a little tureen von'll rise,
When yoa have jot ihe Jang I
, Yon told oi that th Lnso, Abe,
" Were rascals lo the core,
" Eecs.nse the? made so free a use .
'""VOI Ur.cla Samuel's s'ord.
I jll sixty Millions in a year !
- Now wasn't it a sin
For Democrats to sqnander tha
,Tbe darli ng people' tin ?
And are yon not deserving, Abe,
Both gratitude and arnb.
c For bavin stopped this wickeJ leak
In Uncla Samuel's tub 1
The sase who did this wpndrous deed
r Is fit for saints to snp ;
' It only cosis two millions more
" Taping the vessel op !
Ifod said the Sooth had ruled n.", Abe,
Some fifty years in peace.
And that ifie time had fully enma
When their vile reizn should cca !
.That yoa were boo id to take the helm,
The sinking ship to save.
And pn: hr on another track
"""Ani I really think you have!
Yo i're ont of look ntjre!r Abe,
. The engine's off the track ;
Tb boiler's burst, and there yoa are,
- A squalling on yonr back I
Thfi excise man is at the door,
5 ' Contractors err for pell ; .
tYoii're blind and s'upid. deaf mrd lama,
y.or t ery well yoaraelf.
"
Toiir Cabinet feeble, Abe,
" And dull as any deoce ;
'And if Ton have an onnce of brains
You'll ship them off at once ;
'Send Stanton to th Feje Isles.
I' Give Wrelles ani Chase the sack,
,Sw p Hal'ck for a Hotten'ot,
' And send for lit de IIac !
'I know yot lell os, Uncle Abe,
' 1'his is a mighty war.
Aril that the job is ra:her more
; Than what yod bargained for !
Th it yoa have done the best yea could,
. . To make the rebel rue it :
' And if yoa knew what next to do,
Yoo'd go rijjhtoffand do it !
Now tbat'i the very thing. Abe,
That makes this din and clatter ;
Yoa don't appear lo "see it,' Abe,
s And thai is what's the matter !
The nigsei'a in the wood pile, Abe,
, sh is any trout ;
t)o tou think the Proclamation, Abe, .
Will make the weasel out t
. Yon xrant :o free 'lie darkies, Abe
Al least so I constroe it ;
Th difllcatty seeras to be
-' To fi d -ot bow to do it,
Tbs way, dear Abe. is mighty dark,
And bottiersomo to see ;
I fear yoo',!l have to ste.it op,
And let the dariiey be.
J t-sTI yoa ivhat is Abe, ; : . 1
Tii s folks begin, to think
This colored sop is rather stale
. For victi a!s or for drink, ,
bar mothei'8 love Iheir absent sons,
Oar wivi-3 their husbands troef . i
XjJ' no on cares . rnoaldjr fij,
Yot Ccff;r or for joa. :
From the Loian county Ohio) Gtzrtte
A WONDERFUL VISION.
What I here relate, is true. That which
I have sern, I have seen ; and that which I
know, I know. Let all ihs people read
what is here written, and ponder the won
derful things I have seen in a vision. For
much of that which I have een in a vis-ion,
will be seen in the reality by all, in thefnl-ness-of
the evil time which is coming and
which now U. For a voice hath said, 'that
which thou beett, write !'
My son our first born the object of otir
dearest love and most affectionate care
whom we had reared in the ways of virtue,
and educated with the view to an honored
life, was among the dead at Gettysburg.
We brought him home : to that dear hearth
by which he had grown from infancy to
young manhood; to the hame which lie had
left but a few months ago in the glow ol
health and the enthusiasm of hope. We
had brocgr.t him back, a mangled corpse
with a ghat! wound on t is fair trow
hardly to be recognized now, even by the
loving mother who bad borne him, and
who bewailed him with uoceui-ing lamen
tation. Dead ! And my honse was filled with
the sad faces of neighbors and friends, w ho
had known and loved our boy, and who
catne now to condole with us in lha iiour ol
overwhelming sorrow.
He was buried. And I returned to a home
which was saddened forever, lo that lamil
iurroum, where, in the years that paed,
my boy had so olten, lrom his infancy to
manhood, sal on my knee, or by my t-iJe
How dark it seamed ! How dolorous
And sleep had fl ed from ir.e. My eyes,
which had relumed to weep, teemed as it
they were feared, and blessed slumber
came not.
All throusih the dreary hours hours i
which seemed ages !-of that awful night I . iacei-- iaou'a lI,e uin.ura uu
waited and watched, and knew not repose. ! eli Fs'". ch as avar.ee, hatred, re
That long night wore away at last and a ! venge, &c. One whom I saw wasdimnu
day of fasting ,-ucceeJed; and the dolorous ; "e "Ialuie and appearance, but he held
uight came again.
As I looked out of the
t
window to the i
k . a i . . '
innoii , nor stars, but brighter and clearer;
, . , , ... , . t , , I
than mid day, illuminated what seemed a :
. , , . , , . . . !
vast plain, upoa whtcn ihe minutest object .
. ,. - i , . l !
might b- discerned w i;h a clearness which
, r ,
was wonderful J
, , , , , . , . . , . .. ,
And as I looked, I behe! 1 the coming of
. . . . . .1 i i 1
a great hosi. marching to the sorrowful ,
, t i i .u
sound of a mi.nled drum. A? thev came i
nearer, and glided past, I remarked that
there wa n sound ol icotsteps wliwe they
trod. Then I knew they era spectres
the shadow ol the, countless dead, fallen in
battla. Their garments were soiled and
shudder
torn. And I obsered, with a
which thrilled horribly through me, that the
death-wound was iij-ou every form, and that
each ghaMly face was the faca of a corpse.
Great Gol! here was an arm shot away , J And I looked, and lo I a great aseni
and there a gash o: ihe forerwad : a-ain, i e of men, many of whom had s.-rolls
and an eyeball burst with a shot.; and yet
hot-; and yet
again, a temple crushed as by a blow of a
tun-barrel. And as the spectre-host glided
by. I heard a voice, saying: "Weary, in-
deed, wilt thoo be gazing ; for days and
days must elapse, marching at this forced
march which thou beholdest ere this vast
army of ihe dead can pas." I turned away
in horror, and prayed that I might be spar
ed a spectacle which seemed to freeze the
very blood in my veins. But now 1 knew,
as I had not known berore, what a multi
tude had fallen in battle.
When 1 looked again, the vision had
changed ; and lo ! in the place of those
grizzly shadows, 1 beheld a great pool of
blood. It was to large that ships might
ride on its crimson billows. And congre
gated by ihe hundred thousand, all around,
the wide circumference of i s margin, were
women, palid and tearful,, each clad in
robes of sombre blackness, and having lit
tle children by the hands, who wppt inces
santly, and gazing into their mothers' faces j
and called upon those who could make no
response, for their blood was in the pool al
their feet. And far beyond this horrible
pool my gaze extended to houses made
deolate, and families impoverished. I be
held these widows in their struggle for
bread. I conld see them chilleJ and shiv
ering and crouching in scant clothing over
wretched embers which imparted no
warmth, hot which were all they conM pro
core. - And I beheld those orphan chiUren,
squalid and wretched, oncared for and un
educated, going down into the haunts of
vice, swept into the vortex of crime, for the
wart of the fa'her's guiding and reslrain
kg hand. And I cried oot, in the bitterness
o! my heart : "How long, oh Lord, how
long?" And what shall we obtain which
will repay us for all these horrible sacrifi
ces And the voice answered : "Look to the
left of the pool which is before thee, and
see what thoo beholdest.''
And I looked, and beheld avast grove of
trees, which were leafless and dead ; and
on the branches of the trees were huddled
myriads of onclean birds lazily flapping
their wings, and wiping what seemed to be
blood from their beaks. And nnderneath
was a rooltitnde of men, crying, "blood !
bloodl more blood !'' And the voice said :
"These are the Shoddy Contractors, place
holders, money-getters, and the ungodly
among the priesthood. Listen attentively,
that thoo raay'st hear." ...
And I heard io load and demoniac shrieks:
"Prosecute the war! Down with ihe
Peace-makers! No compromise 1 No ad
j ustrnent ! No settlement ! The war roost
go 6a ! Down with the Constitution -it-is
a league with hell ! Curbed be the old Un
ion it is a covenant wi'.h death ! Down
with Liberty except for negroes ! Arm
the black man ! Fire the torch '. Whet
the blade,! Bum citie depopulate v ill-
ages waste plantations take the bread
from famirhing children drive weeping
women Irom the roofs that t-hener them!
Steal books; steal pictures; 8iU precious
plates! God is asleep! There is no hell,
neither is there a judgment !'
And as I gazed, "I cried out, '-Merciful
Heaven, are thee nun or are they devils 1
A hell on earth ? or rather, has not the veil
been removed which hide the unseen from
this visible world ? Am I not looking upon
fiends already damned ? '
And the voice said : "Listen yet again,
while the ungodly priests are spraking'
Atid I listened, and heard : "A new com
mandment give I unto you, that he hate cue
another. Turn your plow-share into swords
and pruning hooks into spears. Thou t-halt
hate thy neighbors. Do not unto otherr!-as
you would have them do unto you. Ac
cursed be the Peace-makers. Chrsl was
the Prince of War. Thou shall lie ; thou
shall steal, thou shall Lear false witness
against thy neighbor; thou shult kill!
Glory to John Brown! Gioryto the row
Saviour ! Hobai.nahs to the uti Redeem
er."
3at ( could endure the impious blasphe
my no longer. Turning away, I tiehild,
fiittir.g about, beneath the unclean birds,
jet over the heads of Hie demoniac cro.vd,
a phantom figure with a long grizzly beard
and a rape about his neck.
And the voice said : ' The phantom hat
thou seest is the spirit which begets the
idola'ry. the blasphemy, the Iraud, the ra
pine, and the crime which thou hast vtii-ue-ed."
And as I looked, I beheld many familiar
a Pig oouit unuer ins ami, aim uu uio cuici
oi lfae bojk was laBCribeJi S3,id0 p-r an
num Avarice was Ins passion, ana ne
had bartered his soul for gold. And I be-
held an eu'eriy man uh marked features
J .
and lineament, and iron-gray hair, who
' ' ;
with strong speech was goading the Irant'C
,, , .
multitude to yet greater excesses. He had
J a
bartered his soul al the shrine of ambition.
And vet another,- younger in appearance,
' ' T , , ,
with t'eard prematurely white, who had
. J . ,
sold fnniseit lor naugtit. and who pursueu
the grizzly phantom, grasping and clutching
at what was at last shadowy and unreal.
Arid many I beheld who looked sad and
gave signs of remorse, and who seemed
n,oua lo cscaPe ,ro,n 111,3 Jarnued beings
wLo nurrouii l-'u inem.
And the v(.n-d said : "Look now to the
; ''f'i "" s lba' whicn lo Be t'eda
'n their hands, and many were tearing ban-
j ,n tbeir nanus, and many were tearing Dan-
' "ers. 0. the scrolls, some were inscuDed,
; m golden letters : 'The Constitution;" oth
"r, "Christ's sermon on the Mount ;" oth-
! p" "The Golden Rule." O.i the banners I
read, "Constitutional Liberty ; The Union
t as our fathers made it "Blessed are ihe
Peace-makers." 4 Cornpromise--agree with s'owely fell into line ; the two last, Richard
thine adversary while ihou art in the way Smith, alias Murphy, from Boston, a har
wiih him." I observed that lha eyes of the ness maker, and William Davis, were taken
assemblage were turned toward heaven and tieir hands tied behind them, and led over
looking up I saw against the sky a bright to a field in Ironj of ot ihe camp. They
cross, bearing the inscription which, greet- then marched us over there, and the men of
ed the eyes ol the first Christian emperor of the First Louisiana formed on oar right and
Rome : "By this sign shalt thou Conquer." . Ju at right angles wiih as, thus forming a
And I thought I Leheid the heaveus open-. square open on the sid9 where the two
ing, and the spirit descending like a dove. ! prisoners stood guarded by two squads of
The shades ol departed statesmen and pa- men.
triots, and of murdered mtyrs were hov- j Their eyes were bandaged with handker
ering in the air. There were Washington, ; chiefs, and every preparation mad for their
Webster, Clay, Jackson, and Douglas ; aud execution. Although we could not believe
as thev gazed upon the left, their csunte-
nances evinced sorrow and indignation
There, loo, were twelve innocent men slain
by the monster McNeil and Mnmlord, who
was hanged by Butler, the beast, and Boll-
meyer, with that smile upon his face, which
he wore when dying. And I looked again
to the left, and l saw trial as otten s.s any
one sought to pet out of the infernal circle,
its denizens yelled after him with bit er im -
precations of "Traitor," '-Disloyal," and
similar epithets; or rushed a'ter with words
.... . ,
or drove ;him back with bayonets et
many escaped, with great joy at their de
liverance, and met with glad welcome from
ihe rapidly increasing hosts on the right.
And from the left they incesean'dy called
and begged for deserters from the right-
But few responded, and they only whn
promised an enormous price. And these
crawled upon their bellies through mire and
filth, from cne assemblage to the ether.
And I noticed that their laces instantly be
came black, their feet cloven, and their
tongues forked and fiery.
And the voice said : "What thon behold
est at the North, is but a counterpart of
what I might show thee at the South. There
marchelh a specter host, and there urdleth
a poos of blood ; and demons aie there ey
ing for carnage and for vengeance and
there, too, is a great ho6t, like unto that
which thoo seest on the right, begging for
Union, for Peace, for Compromise, for Con
stitution. But look yet again, and thoo
wilt see the terrible judgments which are
in store for a people who violate the com
mands of the Almighty !"
And 1 beheld a brazen sky, and glaring
son, and vegetation parched with drouth,
and springs whose fountains had failed,
channels rocky and dry. And I sav a great j
multitude of men, women and children hur-1
rying with parched tongues and feeble fool
steps to the great lakes and rivers, to ap- (
peae the demands of thirst.
I looked again, aud I beheld another
curs, for behold the green fields were
smiuen with the frot in the summer time,
and yielded not ihe harvests ; and the cat
tle were dying by the wayside ; and the fa
ces of mothers were wan and bony, and
children werecrying for bread, and there
was a famine in the land.
And I beheld yet another curse. For it
grew dark, and I heard the rushing of heavy
wings, and lo ! the angel of the Pestilence
passed, crying wo! wo ! wo ! to thin peo
ple accursed. Andstrongmen fell down and
died on the highways; and plague spots
came upon every cheek and breast ; and
ihere was none to minister to the dying
and none to bury the dead, and vultures
grew fat and usurped the land.
And I heard a loud voice saying : ,iVeo
gearxe is mine, saith the Lord !''
And that which I relate, is truth, in its
very essence. And 1 have written i: be
cause it is truth. And let all the people re
ceive it as truth- And I beg and implore
all w ho shall read it, to be instructed in the
things which it teaches, and to consider
well that which they do. Study the Divine
CtK.k. Pray vithoul ceasing, lor heavenly
guidance. And let those who have been
lured by false leaders and ungodly priests,
into that infernal convocation, over which
the demon spirit of John Drown bears rule,
flee, in the name of God, as they would
avoid the just curse of heaven, resting neih-
er night nor dat, until they have set their
teet on ihe hallowed ground whe'eon they
stood, when the blessings of Christ rested
upoa us all Amen !
Iljrrjr. Ilarror ! ! Horror It I
Can the mind conceive any greater deeds
of horror than the murder of two Rhode In
land, soldiers for refusing to be consolidated
with a nigger regiment 1 If the statement
be true, the Governor ol Rhode Island owes
it to humauity, and the honor of his state
to demai d trora the Federal Gversment re
paration for the infamous outrage.
MOKE HOttROKS OF THK WAR TWO MIDDC IS-
LANDtKS SHOT.
A correspondent of the Providence Pres
writing from Thilbodeauxville, La., Septem
ber 12, gives the patticulun of the killing
of the two members of the Second Rhode
Islai.d Regiment. This regiment was or
dered to be consolidated with the ''First
Louisiana," which is as we understand it, a
negro regiment. But the men disliked the
order, and.'did not march to the negro camp;
ihey laid down their arms and clustered all
to2ether in cne place. Lieut. Col. Robinson,
t o( the First Louisiana, carne over on horse-
back and repeated the order, but robody
rnoved, and a lew answered "'We belong
to Rhode Island, aud not to Louisiana."
The men theu were threatened that if
they uiu noi start iney should oe nrea into,
jusi as they stood ail cio?lered together; a
regiment stood by, with guns ready to exe-
cute the order. Colouel Robinson, a9 he
saw only a few move, added, "hurry up, or
I'll fire into you." That this, was no idle
threat, we found out afterward. The men
at ihe time that tkev would shoot th;se
men for having simply .tared io shosv that
i they were not satisfied with being thus
transferred Irom Rhode Island to Louiiana,
, and thought that these would be reprieved
at the last moment, yet the scene was ter
! rible lhat there was not one whose heart i
! . ...
was riot Dealing audiDiy on seeing me
j perparations lor the death of two men who
j were generally liked in the Regiment. A
j quad of men were placed opposite, and at
ten paces Irom each prisoner ; the adju'ani
spoke to them for some time, asking, I sup
pose, the name of their families, When he
had finished, the signal -ihe sabre stroke
tor me nrsi putoon io tire, was given, ana i
Davis fell over back ward, as it seemed lo
us killed instantly. At the repetition ol the
signal, the second platoon fired, and Smith
who had stood immovable, although he
had heard his comrade fall, fell, shot
through the legs. Both bodies could be
seen to move although we thought Davis
dead They were finished by the Adjutant
and the Orderly Sergeant of Company F,
1st Louisiana, abbroaching them, and firing
all the charges of iheir revolvers into
them.
Davis was a paroled prisoner, somewha1
child'ish, always laughing and merry.
Smith, I understand, has left a wife and
children behind to morn his untimely
death. Both men were universally liked.
The New York Post, a Republican Jour
nal, in descanting upon the probable eflect
of war opon slavery, 6a js :
"If Slavery is to be continued in this
country - We. WANT THE IRISH and
CATHOLICS TO TAKE THE PLACE of
the NEGROES, and let the Mors Intclli
cent and Mors Virtuous Blacks be liberat
ed !"
WOMAN'S RESOLUTION.
I'll tell you of a fellow,
01 a fellow I have seen,
Who is nether white nor yellow,
But is altogether green ;
And bis name it is not charming,
It is only common Rill,
And he wishes me to wed him,
Rut I hardly think I will.
Oh, he whispered ol devotion,
Ol devotion pure and deep,
And it seemed so very siily,
That I almost (ell asleep ;
And he thinks it wonid be pleasant,
As e journey down the hill,
To go hand in hand together,
Rut 1 hardly think 1 will.
He told me of a cottage,
Ol a cottage 'aiong the trees,
And dor.'t you think the fellow
Tumbled down ii-oi his knee- ;
While the tears the creature wasted
Were erinugti to nun a mill,
And he beed me to accept him,
Rut 1 hardly think I ill.
He was here lat night to see me,
Rut he made so long a stav,
I bewn to think the blockhead
Never meant to go away ;
At tirt I learned to hate him,
And I now bate him still.
Yet he ures me to wed him,
Rat 1 hardly think I Will.
I'm sure I would not chnose him,
But the very deuce is in it,
For he says it I refuse him.
Me could not live a mi'iote ;
Now you know the ble-ed Bitde
Plainly says we must not kill,
So I've thought th mutter over,
AU 1 rullitr think I will.
W1SL AND OTHERWISE.
Short vi-its are the best' &s the fly said
when he lit on the stove.
The dog was h'u tail not for you but for
the bread.
U there was a Utile bell so attached to
the hearts of men ls to ring every time he
did what was wrong, this would be a musi
cal world.
Why is matrimony like a besieged city?
Beciuse those who are in it wish to be out,
and those who are out wish to be in.
A soldier was arrested for stealing a reb
el's goose, said he fonn d the bird hissing ot
the American Hag, aud arrested it for trea
son. The police are after the perpetrator of the
following condrum : Why is a lovely young
lady like a hinge 1 Because she is some
thing to a-dore.
'Was your son egaged before he went to
the war ?' asked Mrs. Rugg cl her neigh
bor. 'No, but he has had several engagements
siuce,' she replied.
'Why don't your lather take a paper?'
said a gentleman to a little urchin, whom
he caught in the act of pilfering one from
his door step.
'Cause he sends me to take it.'
Flave said that if men should rise from
the ilead and read their epitaphs, some ol
them would think they had got into the
'I do rot say that man will steal,' said a
witness on trial, 'but if I were a chicken I
woulk roost high when he was around.'
'No pains wiU'be spareJ,' as the quack
said, when sawing olT a poor fellow's leg
to cure him of the rheuma'irn.
Many say that trumpet-players are
doomed to short lives. We doubt; it we have
known men to blow their own trumpets in-
I cessantly, and achieve a good troublesome
old age.
When Gen. Lafayette was in the United
. States, two young men were introduced to
him. He said to one :
'Are yon married '
Yes sir,' was the reply.
'Hajipy man,' q'loth '.he General.
He put the same question io the other, t
who replied :
'1 am a bachelor.'
'Unlucky dog,' said the General.
This is the best essay on matrimony- ex
1 tan'..
An Opimo.v on Mokgan it is related
lhat an old woman ventured out in the
midst of Morgan and hi men in a little
town in Indiana, and inquired of a rebel,
who was sitting backward upon his
Irame "
'Whar is the gayriller?'
D'ye mean John Morgan ?'
'Yaas, jest so,
There he is said the reb, pointing to
John.
Well said the old lady, eyeing him
fro-i head to foot, 'We've gol better lookin'
horse thieves nor him in Hoosier, an' less
said about'em too.'
An Awakened, bashful man who was
getting into a stage at Norwich, Conn., a
few days ago poshed his foot through the
hoop skirt of a lady passenger, lr. the
course of several ingenious expedients to
extricate he only succeeded io putting his
other loot through the hoops of another lady.
Sinking back in seeming despair he shout
ed, ''Hullo, driver, bold on ! - I thocght I
was getting into a stage, but I find myself
ia a cooper's shop V'
How to be Miserable.
Sit by the window and look over the way j
to your neighbor's excellent mansion which
he recently budt and paid lor, and sigh
out, "0, that fwere a rich man !"' ;
Get angry with your neighbor, and think
you have not a friend in the world. Shied
a tear or two, and lake a walk in the burial j
ground, continually saying lo yourself, i
"When shall I be buried here V j
Sign a note lor a friend, and never forget
tnnr lr i n i ! ntKa atit nvartr limir in the jlatr !
whisper to yourself "I wonder if he will
pay the note ? '
Thiiik everybody means to cheat yoa.
Closely examine every bill you take, and
and doubt its being ginuine, till you have
put the owner to a great deal of trouble.
Believe every copper cent passed on you is
but ha ha'-penny worn smooth, and ex
press your doubts about getting rid of it if
you should venture to take it.
Put confidence in nobody, and believe
every man you trade with to be a rogue.
Never accomodate if y ou can help it.
Never visit the sick or afflicted, and cever
give a farthing to a?sist the poor.
Bay a cheap as y ou can, and screw
down to the lowest mill. Grird the laces
and hearts ot the unlonunate
BmoJ over your misfortune, your lack
of talents, and t elieve at no very distant
day you will come lo want. Let the woork
ho:i-? be ever in your mind, with all the
horrors of distress and poverty.
Fj'Io.v the-e recepts strictely, and yoa
will be miserable in your heart's couleni
if we may so speak sick at heart and at
variance with all the world. Nothing
will cheer or encourage you , nothing throw
a szleam fi t unshir.e or a ray of warmth in
to your heart.
Profit and Loss
As ratJ.eran unscrupulous fellow named
Ben was coming down one morning, he
met Tom, and stoppe! him.
'I say, Jom,' he said, 'here's a pretty
good counterfeit three. If you pass it, I'll
divide.'
'Let's see the plaster,' said Tom ; and al
ter examining it carefully, put ia his vest
pocket, remarking :
'It is an equal division a dollar and a
half a piece V
'Ye,' said Ben.
'All richt,' said Tom.
And oil he went.
A tew minutes afterward, he r
lieti v,
stepped into ihe store o! his friend Ran, '
and purchased a can of oy sters for a dollar i
and a hall, lay ing down the three dollars t
for thetn. The cleik looked at the bill rath I
er doubtingly ; when his suspicions were !
immediately calmed by Tom, who said :
'There is no use in looking, for I receied
ihe note from Ben himself not ten minutes
ago.
, course ,n c;erK, wi.u mis assurance,
forked the dollar and a half in change; wi h ;
this deposit and a can of oysters Torn lelt. '
Shortly afterward he met Ben, who a?ksd
him if he had passed the note. j
'Oil. yes aai 1 Tern at the same time
passing ever the dollar atid and a half to 1
Ben. j
That evening, when Ben made up his ;
cash account, he was surprised to fin 1 the ',
sme e ld counterieit, three in the drawer.
Turning to his 'locum tenans, he asked :
'Where did you get this cursed no'e ? '
Didn't yoa know it was counterfeit ?' J
'Why.' aid the clerk, 'Tom give il to
me and 1 suspected it was fi'y : but he
said he had just received it from y ou, ar.d I
took it.'
The thing hail penetrated the woolcf Ben
With a particular grin he muttered, Sohl!'
and charged the can of oy sters to profit and 1
loss account. :
A Re-Tailer A newsboy rushed into a '
retail store on Har.over street the other day,
and thus accusied the proprietor :
'Say, Mister, do you retail shirts here ?' p
'Yes, my -on we have them to fit you at '.
one dollar each very nice ones.' j
iOii, blaze 1 I don't want a whole one.
Rji I seed on your sign : Shirts retiil end
wholesale, and J though: you might re-tail ;
mine, lor ii warns il bad ; a dig got hold
it, and wouldn't let go if I.d ki I'd hira.'
of
" BhKK." PoMthor, ot the
La Crosse!
(Wis.) Demoimt, is responsible lor the fol- never abse-t iLciti-e; ves irom Church.
I-jwing : I To praise a woman's complexion before
Tha most trusting woman in La Crosse you have washed her face, or her figure b
or.e who says she trusts her hu-band will i tore you have taken of! her gown,
have his neck broke or be killed in some of j To ihink for yourself, and declare your
j drunken sprees
There'san angel for
you.
A gorgeous'y furnished drinking saloon
is an illuminated advertisement of the rail -
road to hell. Fare as low and timt quicker
than by any other route. Tickets ten cents.
Coercing Solpieks. The soldiers it; the j
army some lime ago proposed lo subscribe
for a testimonial to M Clellan. The com-j
manding officer of one of the regiments a !
favorite one writes that "we had raised :
$78 for the M'Clellan testimonial when or- j
ders rame Irom ihe Government to put a j
stop to it ; and we refunded the moaey to
the solJiers."
We alluded io the matter only to show
that the soldiers were forbidden by ihe Gov-
eminent to contribute lo a voluntary testi-
monial of respect and gratitude to their old
Commander!
Does any one suppose that the admin
istration will allow freedom to vote to those
soldier to whoroe ibey thus forbid a free
expression of sentiment in favor of M Clel-ant
Tlie Lost Ship.
There has been a storm at sea, and a gI
)ant ship, wi h all itsfreight of human souls,
has sunk beneath the dark blue waters of
trie ocean. Noi a vestige of the storm now
remains, but the witers sleep peacefully
and calmly, and noi.e would think, wera
they gazing upon its unruffled surlace, that
the storm-king had ever teighneJ iber
Not an hour before the waves were dashing
against the vess"l'. side, the white capped
l.iMmna I. t .,.! r.r. lw4 ,1 r
reverbating thunder rolled along the sky,
and the vivid lightening flashed along the
horizon. The waves rolled higher and high
er, and washed across the vessel's deck.
The planks were shivered to atoms, the
whits sails were torn asunder, and ihe good
ship !ay a wreck upon the waters. There
were strong men Dattung wiMi the waves.
weak women sinking beneath thi waters.
and little childreu borne along on the bo
som of the mighty deep. Mothers werv
trying to clasp their babes, husbands their
wives, brothers their sisters, bu: they were
j:n from their protecting arms by ihe Cruel
waves. It was but a moment they were
separated, and then all sank beneath the
waters into one commo i grave. They are
sleeping peacefully beneath the coral caves,
and the mermaids are chanting iheir re-
quium,
Oh ! lho-e treacherous waves. How
many homes they have left desolate and
lonely ! How many hearts they have filled
wi h sorrow ! When the lime arrives for
ihe i-hip's return friends will te anxiously
wailing lo greet friends but ihey will look
and long in vain. As the days lenthen
into weeks, the weeks into months, and the
months into years ihey will cease expect
ing, and hope will die from their hearts.
Tl.tMj their "vill be anguish, morning and
weeping. Prayers mingled with wails will '
ascend to the throne of Heaven, but if it will
avail naught. Never again will the lost
friends come ; never again will the maidea
behold her lover, the wife her husband,
the parent their children. There will al
ways be a sanctuary within their hearts,
cousecreted to the memory of lUe loved,
lost aud dear ones who are sleeping the
dreamless sleep beneath the wa'er of the
ocean.
Life and Love.
Wha lessons are embodied in thy leach-
i iiis ! stern lessoi.s as we in our days of
hope and happiness, could never thjuk of
encouiiterit g. as we Pt sail under s.inny
skies, and our bark glided piea-atttly over
smooth water: we did nut dream of ths
clcu.li. the storm, and the tempest, that
coTie all too sooti and woke us Irom our
fond eecitrity.
Time, the great monitor of all hear s
teaches us to ihe undeniable and stern
tru'h' that change is written or, all things;
bu, ,he 8ajje,t U deatn. Qh how terrible
is the wreck of hearts and homes, when
the messenger, resistless anJ unerring ia
his march, lakes from our rnidsl the brave
ar.d s rong: prayer and tear are of no avail;
hle's Jest-on we must all learj, life's burden
w e mnsi bear.
Who has cot seen some pf their loved
ones wrapped in the cold cerements of the
grave urn! borne to the innumerable city of
the d-a.l ? When remembered lhat in all
our wanderings through life we should
met them no more, see their kindly beam
ing smile, hear their loved tones no more,
have we not i'i anguish ot sou!, u'tered the
wail of a Heeding heart, let me die, for in
all this broal ear'h I have nought to live
for ; but we cannot die when we wish io
most; we may weep at many a grave be
fore we reach our own.
Who has not wept over broken hopes
atd severed ties ? Who has not seeu, one
by one, life's cheri-hel dreams depart, its
golden cha'uee turned bitter-iess ; or snatch
ing rudely from our gtap the hope and
trust of y ear-?
Oh. who cannot say, when ail oarhorded
hopes are crn-heJ, cur household goods ar
scattered ani broken, I would uol live al
ways? AEfCRPITICS or Hcviax
Life. To salons
I vour most sntimmate friend
when be is
I walking with any great man.
To pronounce those the mot pious who
opinions in every society you frequent .
i To tell a confirmed beauty that she looks
much better than she did last season.
j I o praise a daughter just come out, a
I 'he presence of her haudsorne mother or
five and thirty.
ao occupy the attention of a large com
pany by tlie recital or an occurance interest
ing io yourself alone.
To expect that your friends will rsrnera
ber you after you have thought proper- ta
forget them.
To cal' for bed chamber candels at
twelve o'clock, aud io remark to your friend
on a vi-it that you forgot to ask him if h
ever look supper.
Not to wear a coat when voor iiints ir
; r,,eumali8rn) Mt yQd ihoM b)
j ltl0Ugrll dei.ale.
;
I What church do you attecd, Mrs. Par-
lington ? Oh, any paradox church wher
the Gospel is dispecced with !
Gkt ready, boys, old Abe bas called for
tbree hundred thousand soldiers.
u