1 m - ' r J n W. il. JACOBY, Proprietor. Truth and Rigbt God and our Country. Two Dollars per Annan. VOLUME 13. BLOOM SBURG, COLUMBIA COUNTY, PA., WEDNESDAY JANUARY 9, 1861. NUMBER 1. Ft V T llTH i "r TAlt OF THE NORTH : .. TCBL13HED ETIHT WEDSHMT BT .j I . yj jj jfjuflY " y . , ', c ., vi-at Yjlficeaa Main St., 3rd Square below Market, v " ' .. -r i r TERMS : Two Dollars per annnm if paid Win nix months from the time or subscri. VrtH5 : two dallars and fifty cents it not paid rithir. the year. No subscription taken for leas Deriod than fix month: no discon Tinuaoce permitted until all arrearaees are . . . . . .i . paid, nnless at the opfon oi me eunor. -Tke terms of odvutising will he as follows : One square, twelve lines, three times, SI 00 Every subsequent insiMlion, . ..-.. 25 ne square, three months, . . 3 00 'One year, . . . i . . ... ...... 8 00 JLl)oie :poe trn. ; , , . , , TO-DAY ASD iO-MOttEOW. . . . l . - BT UCKALD MASiET. Hiah hopes that bum'd like stars sublime, : Go down the heaven of Freedom ; And true hearts perish in the lime We bit:rliest ned them ? . . But never fit we down and say . There's nothing left but sorrow ; Vie walk the wilderness to day," " The promised land to-morrow. One birds of song are silent now, ' There are no flowers biooming! Yet life beat in the trozen bough,' , - And freedom's sprin4 is coming ! And freedom's tide comes up alway, t Though we may stand in sorrow ; JLcd our good bark, aground lo day, Shall float again to-morrow. Through all the lonsr, dark nights of years, The people's cry ascendeth, . , . 'And eanh is wet with blood a id tears ; Bat our meek sufferance endelh ! " The lew shall not forever sway, ' - The many moil in sorrow ; The powers of earth are strong to day, But Heaven shall rule tomorrow. ' ' " : '' .Tbongh hearts brood o'er the past, our eyes - With sn:i ing features glisten ! For Voloor day bursts np the skies; Lean out your sools and listen ! The world rolls lr-elom's radiant way, And ripens with her sorrow ; Keep heart ! who bear the cross to day, , Shall wear the crown lo morrow. 'O Youth ! flame earnest, still aspire, . With energies immortal ! To many a heaven of desire ' Our yearning opes a portal ! And though age wearies by the way, "' And hearts break in the furrow, We'll sow ihe golden grain to day, " Harvest comes to-morrow. Bu'hl np heroic lives, and all I ' , Be like a sheatheu saber. Heady to Hash nut at God's call, O chivalry oi labor ! -Triumph and icil are twins; and aye, Joy Mm the cloud ot sorrow ; And 'tis the marlwlom to day Brings victory to morrow. ' The Model Local. j The Local Editors and Reporters of Mil-! waukee, Wisronsin, (who, by the way, form club ofheir ovn.) had a banquet i:i jlhat city on Thanksgiving Day, in company ,-with representatives of the Press from other , .parts ol the State. The exercises on the occasion were of a highly interestinj char acterconsisting of addresses, toists re spouse.4, (he reading of a very fine poem, nd singing. In the course ol his response o oue of the regular luats, Mr. Potter, of the Daily Wisconsin, drew the loliowi.-.g anu wun an air oi mutt meuie couue picture of the model Local : , tension, put this question : '-7A model hKl.-U runs to all the fires, ' "If I understand rightly the government ' itteud all the churches (of several of which of ',r "nntry, you acknowledge. d.s. he i a devoted member., is on hand at all lir"-,,ion of rank consequently you have no the weddings, knows everybody in town, is curl standard for the manner of a gentle- 'the first lo here ol all the broken legs, arms, necks, and domestic lies, in all of which he takes ihe deepest interest; knows the quality of all the different kinds of liquor in every saloor, in town, is a zealous member in high standing of two or three Good Tern- : lar Lodges, speud. every evening at a 3ance, is the special admiration ot the floor 'enaoagers of balls who desire to get their names in the papers, sleeps at the station house lo learn all the night mysterie ot the city, understands the precise condition of i nknot Inmhor mnnpr and Mnrl'PN. ! his know!eJ-e of the latter beins derived , , purely from abstract calculations,) knows j the entire history of every dry go.ids firm iu j the business, from innumerable puff of the j establishments, plays billiards ; rolls ten i pins, pla)8 ball, skates, smokes, chews, the two latter of which dependng some-i -what upon the . liberality with which he is j supplied by Habart and Mark) reports eer- i moj on. SuBday.; and .seduction .-and m ur- tier cases on week days, is a special admi rer of, ihe . Benecia Boy," ami, at thar .same time is cheek by jowl with all the clergy - mea in town, retires to bed ai lour o'clock ; in the morning, gen op at six the same 'morning, always sleeps with one eye open - T and with bis boots and .panta oil is dignified and saucy, according to circumstances, gets kiiocked down by some offended ruffian or rawbided by ihe "big brother" of an injur- Jed female; periodically, Js all over at the; same time yet every day' most have three 4 or ioar colorans of leaded matter for his pa lp er in short, does more work, submits to more euSij, endures more hardships, has f reater anhoyances, enjoys, fewer, sobslan--tiai pleasures,' and lives lewer years lhan almost any other nian in town, and all lor "the modest compensation of $C0 or 8600 a year." . ". .'' ' A .V - ' '' When have married people pas'sed thro' "the alphabet -of --life ! When they reach ' tha ba be. Tat reaon why whaies frequent the Arc ' tic seas is, probably, because thy supply the "Northern lights"with oil. " Thi cradle is a woman's ballot-box, and rcTT.tf. cf then deposit ia two fcaHeU at cr.C3. 1 T".nkte Not many years ago it happened that a - J r r young man from IS ew lork visited London. His father being connected with several of - n... .. .. the magnates of the British aristocracy, the . . yu"S American was introduced lo the rash- ion able circles of the metropolis, where, in consequence ol his very fine personal ap- pearance, or that his father was reported to be very rich, or that he was a new figure on The stage, he attracted much attention, became quite the favorite, of. the 'ladies. This was not at all relished by " the British beaux, but as no very fair pretext offered as a rebuff, they were compelled to treat him civilly. Thus mat ers stood when an lion. M. P. and lady made a party to ac company them to their country seat in Cambridge-shire, and the American whs among the invited guests. Numerous were the devices to which these devotees of pleasure resorted, in order to kill that old fellow who will measure bis hours, when he ought to know the) are not wanted, and the ingenuity of every one taxed to remem ber or invent something novel. The Yankees are proverbially ready of iuvention, and the American did honor to his character as a man accustomed to free dorn of thought. He was frank and gay. and entered into the sports and amusements with that unaffected enjoyment which com municate J a part of his tresh feelings to the most worn out fashionables in the party His good nature would have been 6neered at ty some of tho proud cavaliers had he not been such a capital shot, and he might have been quizzed had not the ladies, won by his respecilul aid pleasant civitilies.aiid his constant attentions in drawing rooms and saloons, always showed themselves bis friends. . Bui a strong combination was at last formed among a trio of dandies lo an. nihilate the American. They proposed to vary the eternal waltzing and piping by the acting of charades and playing at various games, and having interested one of those indefatigable ladies who always carry their point in a scheme, it was voted to be the thin Alter some charades had been disposed of, a gentleman begged leave to propose the game called "Crowning the Wisest " This is played by selecting a jodge of the game, and three persons, either lad if s or gentlemen, who are to contest for the crown by answering successively the various ques tions which the rest of the party at are liber ty to tsk. Thcorw he is declared to have been the readiest and happiest in his an. , swers receives the crown. Our American, much against hi inclini lion, was chosen among the three candi dates. He was aware that his posi'ion in the society with which ho was mingling, required of him the ability to sustain him self. He was, 'o be sure, treated with dis tinguished attention by his host and hostess, and generally by the party, but this wa a favor to the individual, and not one of the company understood the character of repub licans or appreciated the republic. The three worthies had arranged kat their turn for him should fall in succession, and be the lat... The first one, a perfect exquisite, man ; win you iavor me wun iiiiurii.auon where your best school of politeness is to be found V "For your benefit," replied the Ameri can; smiling calmly, "I would recommend the Falls of Niagara ; a contemplation of that stupendous wonder teaches humility to the proudest, and human nothingness to the vainest It rebukes the trifler, and arouses the most stupid ; in short, il turns men from their idols, and when we ack nowledge that God on!y is Lord, we feel that men are our equals. A true Christian t1 Pme 1 here was a murmur among tne audi ence, whether of applause or censure, the American could not determine, as he did not choose to betray any anxiety for the re sult by a scrutiny of the faces which he knew were bent on him. The second now proposed his question. He affected to b a great politician, was raouatached and whiskered like a diploma tist, which station he had been coveting. His voice was bland bul his emphasis' was very significant.. . , .- .... . "Should I visit the United" States, what subject with which I am conversant would most interest your people and give an op portunity of enjoying their conversation ?" ' "You must maintain, as you do at pres ent, that a monarchy is the wisest, the purest, and the best government which the skill of man ever devised, and that a de mocracy is utterly barbarous My country men are proverbially fond of argument, and will meet you on both these qustions, and if you choose, .will argue with you to the end of your life.'? The murmut was renewed, but still with out any decided expression of the feeling which bis answer had bean received. The third then rose-from bis seat, and with assured voice which seemed to an- f uoonce a certain triumph,, said : "i require your decision on a delicate question, bul the, tales of the pastime war rant it, and also a , candid answer You have seen the American and English ladies; which are the fairest ?" ' . , The young republican glanced around ihe circle. It was bright with Hashing eyes and the sweet smiles ihat wreathed many a ed patriot from his allegiance. He did not i - . .i t .i i nesnate, tnougn ne Dowed low to me la- j dies as he answered : "The standard of female beauty is, 1 be lieve, allowed to be the power ot exciting admiration and begetting love in our sex, consequently those ladies who are most ad mired, and beloved, and respected by the gentlemen, must be the fairest. Now I as sert confidently, that there is not a nation on earth where woman is so truly beloved, so tenderly cherished, so respectfully treat ed, as in the Republic of the United?States, therefore the American ladies are the fairest. But," be again bowed low, "if the ladies before whom 1 now have the honor of ex pressing my opinion, were in my country, we should think them Americans." The applause was enthusiastic, and after the mirth had subsided so as to allow the judge to be heard, he directed the crown to the Yankee. College Hazing. The process of ''hazing," which faculty of Harvard College recently punished by expulsion, is thus described ; "You send your boy of sixteen, seven teen, or eighteen years to college. He en ters the Freshmen class. Away irom home among strangers, perhaps a little home sick, he appears 'green' or 'spoony.' But he minds his own business, and kn uck les to his tasks. Not so with the im pudent fellows of the class above him. These Sophomores immediately conceive the idea of 'putting through' your boy. They have various ways of doing this. They take him of a cold night an 1 put under th e pump, and after he is well wet and chilled, let him go home to his bed and a sore throat; or perhaps, they will get him into a room and there try to 'smokn him out,' by burning tobacco in the stove, and keep ing up a continued puffing of cigars and pipes, and when they find him becoming pale and sick, leave him with laughter. Or, if he is a nervous or 6ensative boy, they will try to frighten him out of his wits by compelling him to go blindfolded into a darkened room and then show him hideous things. There are various other ways of 'hazing,' snch as ducking in a tub of cold water getting the novitate drunk, etc. If the boy has spirit enough to resist these j outrageous insults, he is told that the result I of resistance will be discomfort and annoy- ance during his whole college lifeand we 'have knowu inUwce where this was the cae. "You will be likely to ask in what part j der the plea of preserving the Union, would of the 'joke' !lhe laugh comes in,' and your j convert the federal authority into an odious boy, of course, feels inclined to put the despotism, and wealthy, high-spirited corn same question, and so do we. j mutinies into theatres of bloodshed and de- They have carried this thing so far in solation. Harvard College that in one or Iwo cases I That Mr. Lincoln and his anti-slavery lives were endangered, and the students ' adherents would gladly see the flame were unable to do any 6tudy during a whole j of servile insurrection, the horrors of war' term. conflict, may be fairly inferred from the ut- 'The faculty of the College therefore made an example of eight Sophomores who were caught 'hazing' some poor Freshmen, and gave them leave of absence for a year, learn al home less bratal manners.' to Extraordinary Double Elopement. The Holmes County (Ohio) Farmer tells this story of a curious elopemenl and its consequences : "On Tuesday of last week, while slar.d- ngon the platform of the depot building Crestline, waiting for the train to start eal ward, we saw a train arrive from the east The first persons we recognized getting i from the train, were W. K. Scott and the j wife of Levi L.. Johnson, Marlborough, i Stark county. They readily recognized ns, came up to where we were, and after the usual salutations, inquired when a train would leave for Bellefontaine. At this mo ment, Mr. Johnson and the wife of Scott also unexpectedly made their appearance. The woman instantlj recognized each other and without uttering a word, 'pitched into' one of the liveliest fr ee fights we have ever i been called upon to witness. The way the ribbons, bonnets, collars and fancy fixings j flew was refreshing to milliners and man tumakers. This excited Scott aud Johnson, and they were so sorely grieved at each tka t r9 pimnintf suratf uriln I hill r rAlnAPT. ' ive wives, that they went into pugilistic ex cise with a hearty good will. , "A great maty persons were gathered around, but no one caring much which ot the parties whipped, they encouraged the fight and laughed at the sport. While the free fight was progressing, constable Smith stopped the fighting. and took the parties before the .Mayor, and his Honor fined each of them $5 and costs for breaking the peace. "Scott and Mrs. Johnson, who have for some time been suspected of being guilty of intrigues, bad planned an elopement, to be carried out on the same day with the other, parties. Both guilty couples had clandestinely slipped off from Muriboro' on the same day ; one party took the cars at Alliance, and ihe other got on the same train, though a different car, at Louisville Station. Neither party suspected the other until they met at Crestline, when ihe feel ings they enjoyed may be imagined, but cannot be described on paper. "After paying their fines, which satisfied them thai fighting was an unprofitable way of settling ihe difficulty, they indulged in ihe application of a goodly number of hard words and names to each other, and finally separated ; Scott and Mrs. Johnson taking the B. and 12 Railroad, and. Johnson and Mrs, Scotl the Ft. VV. and C. Railroad. Since then nothing has been heard of their Ihe President QDd his Assailants. Having failed in their a-temps to force the President into the adoption of the coer- cion policy, the leading Lincoln journals of the North assail the Executive with a ma lignity never exceeded in partizan contro versy. The Courier and Et quirer, the Times the Tribune, and the Black Republican press generally exhaust the vocabulary of abuse in ar.imadvertions upon Mr. Buchanan's capacity and motives; and they receive aid and encouragement from ihe mercenaries who boast of their independence, whilst ready to sacrifice their best friend on the altar of sensation journalism. Only the atrocity of these attacks redeems them from contempt. Vituperation-and slander, and v downwright, unmitigated falsehood are jumbled together thro the whole columns of attack, with a pertinacity which springs frnm hafflfl m!n-tiif and Innr nent hatn. .r, i . ... , j ,.,; ,l l he conduct of the Administration in the - crisis is the pretext upon Mr. Buchanan's assailants proceed. They rate him and his advisers roundly on the alledged ground of "imbecility, indecision, weakness, treason;" the Tribune reaching theclimax of atrocity by publishing sta'.e.nen's impugning Mr. Buchanan's sanity, and declaring its hope j they are true : and others attaining the top most folly by gravely calling upon him to rosign his office into other hands ! Th cause of this disgraceful bitterness of spirit lies upon the surface. Mr. Buchanan has incurred the displeasure of the Lincoln party by his repudiation of the coercion theory and his firm refusal to permit a re sort lo force as a means to prevent the se- cession of sovereign States. Pretending, a some of the Black Republicans do, so far to "hold the right of self government sacred" as lo object theoretically to State subjugation, it is plain that the whole party practically favor coercion, and are anxious that it shall be employed against the seced ing Commonwealths. They would like to have Lincoln's battle fought by Mr. Bu chanan. They would infinitely prefer ihat Mr. Buchanan should employ the resources ol the Federal Government in subduing in dependent States, Mhan that Mr. Lincoln should have the mortification of finding himself the chief officer of a section, as dis- j tinguished from the President of the United Slates. Mr. Buchanan wisely declines to be the Black Republicans' eafs-paw He refuses to precipitate the country into civil war, merely, to serve the purposes of the opponents of slavery. He will have noth ing to do with the tactics of those who, un- j terances of recognized leaders, in Congress I and the pres. Such a course would be i but the carrying out of their ultimate and unalterable schemes. But they are not, therefore, to be regarded as trustworthy commer.tors upon Mr Buchanan, or the line of action which he has honorably fol lowed. He is not a coercionist. He is not 1 an opponent of State rights lie is not an I anti slavery emissary, whether of the Gar ri;ori or Lincoln stripe. And-havins pro muc,ated the reasons which led him to ac- i cept U,e no-coercion view of the State and Federal relations, as understood by national statesmen, North and South, the only path of patriotic doty open to him is that to which he quietly, but steadily adheres. Rave and abuse and falsify as they may, Mr. Buchanan's assailants will not succeed in a manner inimical lo its interests. He nas proceeded iu the only way that admits of the preservation of peace, the restoration of our confidence and the reconstruction of the Union under happier auspices than at present attainable. The consciousness of the fact that his motives have been and are of the purest, and that his policy commands the approval of all but the sup per ers of Mr. Lincoln, secret or avowed, ! mar well sustain Mr. Buchanan amidst as- 1 hg hl ba?fl more ffinity lo barbarism than aught that has been knowa in modern political warfare. Constitution. After a Battle. The following graphic sketch, from the pen of English officer who served with his regiment throughout the war against the Sepoy mutineers in India, describes the field of battle after the victory of Munda soore : A battle field immediately after an action is no very inviting scene. More than one sense i sickened by the objects around; the air is tainted, and death &iares you in I ihe face in most hideous lorm ; swollen and bloated carcases covered with voltures or being torn to pieces by ihe pararie dog s; corpses lying drawn up in a heap burnt to a cinder; some without a vestige of cloth ing, others lying peacefully as they fell ; the village was almost too foul to pass through, almost every house had its in mates of dead in some ghastly form or oth er what the sword had commenced fire had ended. Death and black ruin lay ev erywhere togelher. Spite of all this,one o d woman, who seemed nearly eighty years of age. had remained there a witness of the fearful consummation. Perhaps she was too feeble to fly or held thlitila., life then; flowing in her veins too worthless to pro long. She appeared starving as she sat on a rtnr famhW M.hi-i ' sM rVt: Vi floral no one to comfort her, and the soldiery passed her by as they would a dog. Dowu a well not far from the village we found a ! man hiding in a recess of the earth. How long he had been there no one knew, but he was too feeble to ascend by a rope which was thrown down to him. .However we helped him up, and when he gained the lop he was too weak to stand. Some brandy -and-water and native bread was offered to him by Major Boileau; but this he refused as he might have done poison, although he appeared dying from starvation! Another was discovered in a tree where he must have been (or three days. He refused at first to come down ; a musket was point ed at him, which had the desired effect ; i - . i i . i j uown lie came, maicmocK, luiwar, ana powder-horn, too. In his belt we found eighty-eight rupees. This the men divided and the bird was made a prisoner and sent r .i e.i.i. .u mm camp, in one oi me news an oiu wo- , . . . . . . . man was found witn her right leg shattered with a shell ; in another, a little girl about nine, with her leg shattered ! All over the maiden were scattered English books, pa pers, envelopes, Lidies' silk dresses cover ed with blood, bonnets, parasols, elegant j drawing room chairs, and other thing the rebel had plundered from Neemnch and i other s'ations. The village still smoulder ed ; the high crops were all beaten down the eaith torn up ; nullahs filled with bro ken furniture, dead cattle and dead mea ; black heaps ol ashes lay here and there, with "charred corpses in their centres; the air was laden with sickening gasses in which vultures, kites, and crows circled and screamed, and circled over the horrid carcases below ; wretched camp followers were prowling among the corpses and ruins women, laughing and trampling through the broken corn men, turning about man gled bodies, diving into wells and tanks, climbing trees, and breaking down grain stacks all searching for plunder like cow ardly assassins, and revelling in the horrors of death like fiends ! The nse of English Classical Literature. Thorough and accurate sluuy of the Eng lish language and literature would supply what the great body of fairly educated peo ple are greviouly deficient in, viz : power rf ovn rOAui rn It hia rivor I un'iirira f been ascertained how large a precenta:e ol the middle class of this country can write and speak their own mother tongue with fluency and correctness. This is too delicate and subtle an inquiry for the ma chinery of the census ; but, were such an inquiry possible, the resuhs would not af ford much gratification. As a matter of fact, the language is degenerating in the hanJs of prolessional writers ; hybrid words awkward and conventional phrases, daring anacoloulha, and extraordinary syntactical licenses, are continually manifesting them selves in the current literature of the day. Much more then must wete prepared for maltreatment ot the Queen's English among the trading and commercial classes. And we find it plentifully. To be able to teil in plain words; lo make a statement simply, clearly, concisely ; to record the details of business in vigorous, business like terms is an accomplishment that dofs not appear in company with shred sense and sound business capacity. Now it would go far to remedy this defect if the nascent hopes of the commercial classes were carried thro' a coure of the strong, nervous, racy proe ol the seventeenth cen'ury. Brrow and South may be voted somewhat dry reading; but the former helped to make Chatham an orator, and the latter can boast of a style' the mixed excellences of which adapt it for the use of the rhetorician on the one hand, and Ibe practical man of business on the other. It is surely not necessary to seek further arguments in favor of such a reform or modification of existing methods of educa tion as shall more prominently and more effectually enlist in the caue the services of our national literature. If that literature embody all the excellences for which we give it credit, if il be full ol the living pow er of geni us, if it be a rich storehouse of thought and argument and imagery, if it breathe a manly, generous, liberal spirit, and be pervaded by a pure and healthy morality, it must, if rightly applied, act powerfully and benignantly on the opening faculties of our English youth. Mysterious Disapprarance. Our cotemporary of the VaUty Spirit has a felicitous way of doing up a local occa sionally when the ma'erial is at hand. In the following, while we cannot but pay the credulous Frenchman, we find a vein of humor which 6roacks of genuine "attic salt." About ten days ago a dapper'little French man made his appearance in this place and formed the acquaintance of a well known resident named Alexander Kovila-ki, a pol ish Jew. The twain seemed to be well pleased with each other and when the lime for the departure of the Frenchman arrived Kovilaski' heart warmed so affectionately towards him, that he could not think of parting with his new made acquaintance, and proposed accompanying him lo New York where the Frenchman was to obtain the snug sura of six thousand dollars. The Frenchman did not understand the language and customs of the country, and Kovilaski tendered his invaluable services to see that he got his draft all right, in current fund-, and that the pickpockets and garroters of Gotham did not get him or his money into W""-51 n i,ml im.'r 1 the money and deposited it in a carpet bag, which was handed over by the unsuspect ing Frenchman to the nafe keeping of Kovi laski. They then sauntered around the city to see the sights, when Kovilaski, ai a certain point in their journeyings, suddenly recollected that he had some important bu siness to transact a few miles out of the city. He parted with his French Friend, and as a token of remembrance, in case they should never meet again, he look the carpet bag along", promising to return and meet the Frenchman at their lodgings in a few hours. The Frenchman waited a few days, but Kovilaski did not return ! He j then poMed back to this place in great per turbation of mind to find the missing mar), presuming ihat he had returned to ihe bosom of his family ; but he is doomed to sad disappointment. Kovilaski ia won est inventus, and it is not at all improbable that he will keep so. The Frenchman is not so much concerned about Ihe money as he is about the man. He thinks if he could only find ' Kovy" his money would be safe. He will not belive that he has been victimized. He remained in this place several days, but, Kovilaski not appearing, he returned to New York under the belief that he might still be searching for him in that city t It is not likely they will cross each? other's path soon, and in the meantime the French man can make up his mind that he has been duped by an artful knave, and that his mooey is gone past recovery. . Slow and Sure. We may learn some thing from our German citizens. They thrive on the same income that a Yankee would starve on. We knew a young Ger man whose eapitol, when he landed on our shores, consisted of a singularly constructed suit of blue clothes and a lorg tailed pipe Yet in five years he bad a house and lot, money at interest, a wife, two babies, and any quantity of domestic bliss and pickles During the most of this time our meriton ous friend received a salary of only 6ix dol lars a week. A Yankee might have receiv ed five times that sum and come out head over cars in debt. The fact is, Germdns have very sensible notions of life. They are not fast. They drink beer and smoke pipes with astonishingly long stems, but they are not addicted to "calling on" mul titudinous baskets of expensive He'ulsieck. They are industrious and economical. They know enough to lay up something for a rainy day, which is a great deal more than some Americans know. Many Amer icans seem to think that they will have no difficuliy in borrowing umbrellas when the financial rainy day comes, but they ascer tain their mistake when the time arrives, aud are too often forced to seek shelter in the poor house or go and live with their pa rents. Meanwhile our Teutonic friend goes pleasantly ahead, raising garden sauce and babies, and constantly waxing richer, fatter and jollier. We repeat, thai we may learn koineihir.ii from our German citizens. A Problem Solvkd The following prob lem ha arrested many a fellow in hi rush through Old Badcock's arithmetic, partly by il difficulty of solution and partly by its exqusite poetry : A horse in the midst of a meadow suppose. Made last to a stake by a line Irom his no-e: How long must the line be that, leediug all round Will permit him lo graze just an acre of ground ? The Maysville Express volunteers a solu tion as follows : I'ts a very plain cae,if you'll only 'suppose' That it's jusi seven feet from his tail lo his nose ! For the line will be then (the rule cannot fail) About keven teet less lhan if tied to the tail. The following beautiful stanza is copied from a young lady's album : "Fare made, when I Bhold ure fac, & gaze in two ere azhur ize, my love is warmed in 2 a blaze & thtfiits within my oozum rize 2 big for my week tung to utter, which leves my hart awl in a flutter." " Why, John, 1 don't think you like liver." "O, yes," said John, "I like it very well for forty or fifty times, bul 1 don't like il as a steady diet." The eld lady cooked something else for the next meal. A man- recently put his dog to bed and kicked himself down stairs ; he did not dis- cover the mistake until he tried to chase cow and couidr. 't bark A brother lawyer once told Sane that a beard was unprofessional. "Right," said Saxe, "a lawer cannot be too barefaced." He is happy whose circumstances suit his temper, but he is more happy who can suit his temper to circumstances. Passion is a very keen observer, but a wretched reasoner. It is like the telescope, whose field is clearer ihe more contracted il is. A man in love has very little need of vic tuals. So if your landlady doesn't give you enough lo eat, iatl in love with ber daugh ter. "Down outside", said the fiddler, when he fell out of ihe window. Speak low, ladies ; and yet always en. deavor to be high toned women. in Old Time Fict'nre. Wherever a railroad has made itfc way. tne old fashioned vill age inn disappears. II flies before the coming engine like a wiUl flower a the touch of the plough -share. . The picture of a New York village inri has become historic a thing of the past. It and the stage coch were lovely in their lives, and in death" they will not be divided. What New York country boy boy twen ty years a-ao! does not remember that inri cannot shut his eyes and see it now, a it stood a rambling structure, with low browed "stoop"' and welUworn step, and the traces of time and storm upon its bal- ter'ed gables? Here was the barroom; here the great fire place, with its huge eld knob-andirons, in the old fashioned winter. bearing a pyramid of fire, while around it ' the rush buttoned chairs were drawn up in a great circle. And where is ihe old Boni face, with ''capon lined," shuffled around in his slippers and stirried the glowing logs with a areat shovel, till they roared again ? And where is the old village squire that sat there in the corner, and nightly saved the. nation "from war. pestilence and famine ;" whre the village gossip that retailed to the crowd of listners the small scandal of the day ? The walls are covered with bUi handbills; all that remains of one is a frag ment abour a carding machine, while the top of the bill,' where the wool ougnt to be," went away in a whiff, as it lighted some body's pipe, while in the lieu thereof, 'con stable's sale,' done with poor pen and pale ink, is attached to the wall with four sec tions of an unfortunate wafer. Here an im passale horse is getting away from ari In describable man; there and old placard of a "Caravan" hangs in tatters, a green parrot havir.3 allighted on a blue elephant, and a rampant lion having thrust his nose into the pocket of a stage driver's coat that hangs fro m a wooden pin, but grandest of all is the picture of the stage coach labelled the "Enteprise," that is drawn by four spank ing horses, with three legs or so a piece, is plunging directly into a thunder cloud.while "John Rogers and family" stand aside to see the world go by ! - Here is a bunk, slrown witfi a buffalo robe, a rough coat, the advertising half of an old newspaper, a whip with' an Alexan drine lash, and a village loafer; and there, in that dim corner, is a cage, with wooden bars pointed at the tops, and a narrow shelf beneath, through which, aforetime, little green tumblers and round black bottles came and went, as the weather was cold or hot. or wet and dry, or the wind blew from the north, or "there was a great calm." Then there was the dog, huge shaggy and old as long ago as we can remember, old before that, forever asleep under the bunk, or forever lying with his nose between hla paws in the open door.2 It is summer, and a summer noon. Tho big yellow watch hangs motionless, ihe blacksmith's hammer intermits, a man lies asleep on the dry goods box, and the mer chant stands still in the door. A thirsty dog is lapping water al the trough by ihe pump, and a drone is saying bis prayers on its edge. The bar-room is silent, all but the heavy breath of the dozing master and dog, and the drowsy hum of flies. The fire-place is green with asparagu. for the" winter is over and gone. Faintly in the distance is a sound il is a bee in the gar denshriller, clearer il is a shout. Lou der, louder, nearer, it is the horn of the coming stage ! Now it winds op and down among the notes like a bugle, abrupt, and emphatic, and then with a "dying fall." The landlord arouses himself, the dog is awake, the post-master comes out upon the steps, ihe tailor looks out of the window. The rattle of wheels is distinguished, the jingling of bolts and the crack of ihe long whip. Down the hill, over the bridge, here ' it come, rounds to wiih a flourish, and the four in-hand are brought np before the door with an emphasis thai makes the old coach ' rock and swing like a ship in a swell. The dopr is thrown open, and one wo-' man in a green calash emerges; the de pleted mai'bag is whirled out from beneath the driver's feet, and the leaders and wheel horses already are meeting the "relief," as they defile out from the shed, the leaders gay with tassels and the bright plated rings. "All right," is ihe cry ; the "ribbons'' are in hand, twosharpe notes upon ihe horn ; ! the women in the green calash comes out again ; the coach door goes to with a bang ; ; ihe whip is whirled off with a whistle, and, j by some slight of hand, explodes exactly between the oil leader s two ears, ana away they go, while clouds of dost roll up behind the dusty "boot" and hide the small boy towed by the straps like a small boat stern'. The "Columbian Star." and a letter for the lawyer are taken out of the bag ; ihe tail or's needle is flashing again through lhe seam ; the sparks begin to fly at the door of ihe Blacksmith thelandlord lies stretch ed at leugth on the bank, and the world has' gone by tor a day ! Happy village ! Would that the Rip Van Winkles of the valley might awake from ' their long, long sleep ; but not the stage horn's herald note, nor the steamer's as it . rings along the river ; nor yet tie voice of the steed whose neck is clothed with iron, with thunder, can disturb their dreamle' repose ; for no sound can reach them where iLey lie. Auljum Demccral. A Western paper published a number of verses a few days ago one as lollows : That rainy day 1 met her, When she tripped alonz the street,' And with petticoats half lifted, Showed a dainty pair of feeU