THE STAR OF THE NORJj,
W. Weaver Proprietor.]
VOLUME 3.
THE STAR OF THE NORTH
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PSINUTO ME SOFTLY,i?JUY SISTEB.
BY MRS. R. 8 NIC1IOL?.
Oli sins to me softly, to-night,
For u"enc£passed by darkness,
And shut from the kingdom of light!
I walk IP life's valley of shadows, I
Where the fountain's low murmurs are still
Where swiftly through grey mist and vapor,
Are gftding pale phantoms of ill.
Thy voice, like the clear thread of silver,
That winds through the still grass, lallp >
Shall steal thro' my heart s silent chambers,
And waken their musie egaut.
Far away from the clouds of the present,
In the Eden of memory's isle,
What visions of peace and ofbeatity,
Shall my spirit of sadness be„uil.
Once more will 1 rove with sweet fancies,
And think the Bweet thoughts of a child,
Once more I will gather °"' h B .. r ° se8 >
The fairer because they are wild.
*And the light which 1 know is immortal,
That shone 011 young life s dewy hour,
Shall steal Irom its crystaline portal,
And brighten fair memory s bower.
Then sing to me softly, my sister,
And pour out thy heart 111 the strain,
Till I dream that the beautiful voices
Of childhood are singing agam.
So my heart shall grow bel'er and purer, j
And strength to us both shall be given,
To work out o priceless salvation,
And Ring with our children in lleavon .
TO THE LADIES.
Dress up a man, that's tall and fair,
Like any pretty miss.
Which of your sex would first ceclare.
She longed that man to kiss.
Just so, when women dress like boys,
The attractive power is gone,
Their sex forgot, and all its joys,
When once our clothes are o 1.
Those who would lake the marriage vow,
This lesson sure it leaches,
That girls in coats, and waistcoats now,
Will onoday wear the breeches.
From nature and from beauty's line,
Your sex havo strangely erred,
That dress, which is not feminine
Musi alwrys be absurd.
JESUS AND SOCRATES.
BY JEAN JACQUES ROUSSEAU.
The mujesty of the Scriptures astonish me
—the sacredness ol the Gospel speaks to my
heart. See the writffigs of philosophers;
with all their pomp are they not inferior to
it ? Could a book so simple and so profound
at the same lime bo the work of men
Could it be that a man made this history of
himself? Is It the stylo of an ambitious
and enthusiastic scribe ? VY hat mildness,
A hat purity in its manners—whnt touching
grace in its instructions—what sublimity in
its maxims—what profound wisdom- in its
discourses—what presence of mind, what
ingenuity and what justice in his replies,
and what dominion over his passions?
Where is the mortal, where is the sage, who
knew how to act, to suffer, and to die, with
out either weakness or ostentation? When
he portrayed his imaginary just man devoid
of all opprobium and criino, and deserving
of aft the prizes of viitue he painted Jesus
Christ feature for feature ; the resemblance 1
is so glaring, that all the fathers have per
ceived it, and that it is impossible to gain
say it. What bigotry, what blindness, was
it to dare to compare the son of Saphroe to
theaon ol Mary! What a distinction be
tween the one and the other! Socrates, dy
ing without grief or ignominy, sustained
himself easiiy to the last of his part; and if,
that painless death had not honored his life,
one might doubt if Socrates, wilh el' his
gsnius, was Olhsr than a sophist. Forsooth, ,
they say he was the originator of mowl'ty-
Others had put it td practice before him; ho
did nothing more than describe what they
had done; he had but to put in • force their
precepts and examplos. Aristides had been ,
just, before that Socrates had declared what
justice was; Leonidas had died for his coun
try, before that Socrates had proclaimed one
ought to love his country; Spartans were
sober, before that Socrates had lauded their
sobriety; before their virtue was praised,
Greece abounded in viituous men; but from
whom among his countrymeu had Jesus ta
ken those moral, elevated, and pure ideas,
of which he alone has given lessons and
examples? The death of Socrates, discours
ing philosophy with his friends, is as sweet
a picture as one can desire—that of Jesus,
expiring in torments, injured, railed at, ac
cursed by every one, is the most horrible
picture one can surmise. Socrates receiving
th poisoned bowl, blesses those who, weep
ing presented it to him—Jesus, in the midst
of frightful torture, solioils blessing* on his
enraged tormentors. Yes, tf the life and
death of Socrates were those of a wise man, the
life and death of Jesus were those of a God.
BLOOMSBURG, COLUMBIA COUNTY, PA., THURSDAY, AUGUST 14, 1851.
SPEECH OF COL. BIGLER.
At the Delaware County Convention-
After the meeting was organized Col.
William Bigler, the Democratic candidate
for Governor was introduced and addressed
the meeting.
Tlio speaker announced his address with
many happy allusions to the reminiscences
of the county in which the meeting was
held, and referred particularly to the scenes
enacted at Brandvwine, l'aoli, and Valley
Forge, contrasting the early history of those
memorable spots with thg presertt day, when
everything around appeared like happiness
and contentment. Ho congratulated the
people upon the success with which their
effoits to increase their stores during the
past year had been crowned, and asked to
be allowed to join his humble voice with
theirs in offering up thanks to a generous
Providence for the rich bounties bestowed
upon them. The next allusion was the re
lation in which 4e stood to the assembled
mass before him—that of a f#fc, enlightened
and happy people ; and in this connection
dwelt somewhat upon the right of suffrage,
exhibiting the importance, on the part of
every man, of the exercise of this high pre
rogative.
The finances ot the Commonwealih, from
1832 up to the present lime, then claimed
the attention of the meeting, and the speak
er, as he expressed it, "showed most con
clusively that the measures from which the
revenue is derived to pay tho interests on
the Stale debt were in existence before the
present administration came into power."
Ho said "that ono of the great errors
committed at the time our system of inter
nal improvements was commenced, consist
ed in borrowing money to pay the interests
on our loans, instead of assessing a tax suf
ficient to have answered that purpose—such
a measure would have attracted tho atten
tion of the people, and a greater degree of
economy, prudence and accountability,
would havo beer, exercised. The first state
tax of one mill, was assessed in 1832, and
remained in force until the adoption of the
bill to release the people from taxation, and
the re-charter of the United Stales Bank.—
The whole receipts in that length of
did not much exceed 51,000,000, while the
1 interest on the public loans exceeded $6,000,-
000. It will thus be seen how inadequate
this tax was, and how unwise it tvas repeal
instead ot adding to the rale of taxation.
Tills was certainly one of the most fatal
movements lor tho prosperity ot me nmc.
that was over adopted.
" In 1838 and '39, a number of exonera
tions wero made, but no taxes assessed. In
1840, a laxdf one mill or. real and personal
estate, and a small tax on bank stock, 011
bonds, mortgages, salaries, emoluments of
office, and other personal property was as
sessed, but this proved a very inefficient
measure. In 1841, the famous Relief Act
was passed. This bill attempted to originate
wealth and means, by large declarations
one of those unfortunate measures which
never fails to mislead the public mind, and
greatly aggravate the disease which it at
tempts to cure. This bill also slightly in
creased some of the rates adoyted in the
act of 1840, but tho alteration was attended
with a very meagre increase to the revenue.
In 1842, a lax of one mill in addition to the
former rate, was adopted, making in all, two
mills, with some unimportant modification
of former laws on the subject. Hiere was
no change of any moment during 1843, but
in 1844, the measure of finance adopted was
the three mill tax on real and personal es
tate, bank capital; corporation stocks, or.
bonds and mortgages, 011 money at interest, j
and on carriages, &c., one per cent., and the
provision made for a hoard of Revenue
Commissioners. In JBl5, an act was pass
ed to increase the revenue and diminish the
expenses of the commonwealth. This im
posed a tax on the enrolment of private acts
I of legislation, bank charters, manufacturing
companies, new counties, divorce bills, and
other special legislation, as well as theatri
cal and public exhibitions of evety descrip
tion, eating houses, the public loans of the
Stato, besides appointing mercantile ap
praisers. This combination did much to
wards aiding tho public treasury, and the
influence was felt perceptibly. In 1846, an
act to perfect the former laws was adopted,
and to regulate the mode and manner of
assessment and collection loans and
sock—the interest of which is guaran
teed by the commonwealth, taxing all
| retailers liable to a tax, ar.d license fees,
1 exle --t e d the Unties of mercantile appraisers,
increasing collated inheritance tax, increas
ing auction duties, bo. 'ihi was a fSfV
important bill, and viewed iu its various
bearings and tendencies, has done much to
add to the resources of the treasury. Iu
1847 and '4B, the changes in the revenue
laws of Pennsylvania were unimportant.
In 184°, the tax on bank dividends was al
tered, a premium on charters charged, and
the manner of collecting the collateral in
heritance tax was blro changed. In 1850,
not a single new item of revenue was adop
ted.
"The Sinking Fund, about whioh so much
has been said, is an old topic. It was sug
gested by (jpr. Porter and Gov. Shunk, re
commended by Col. Snowden, while Stale
Treasurer, who had the boldness to say how
money could be raised, and a bill similar to
the one now in operation was reported in
the Legislature in 1845 by Mr. Burrell. Be
sides this, if my recollection serves me
right, 1 had the honor upon one or two occa
sions of presenting such a proposition. The
law itself is a mere piece of machinery
which any person might devisa—the great
question was to gel the money to put into it.
I always found that the easiest part of my
business lAnsactions was to pay debts if
some one would furnish the means. I will
be peKectly willing to pledge myself to pay
the entire debt ol the State, if the people
will find the money. The sources of reve
nue sustaining the present Sinking Fund
were all in operation before the present ad.
ministration came into power, with the bare
acceptiou of the premium upon charters, the
production of which is but meagre, indeed,
and this latter item, so far as 1 can d'seover,
is the only new item of revenue since the
death of the lamented Gov. Shunk. We can
very readily see, then, tltft the measures
which at present sustain the Treasury were
adopted by preceding administrations, and
it can reasonably bo maintained that the
prosont administration is not justly entitled
to credit for increased revenue from old
sources, and certainly it has had no agency i
in producing increased tolls on our canals.
Iu this matter 1 do not wish to be unkind,
but wheu the measures recommended by the
departed Shunk, are sought to detract from
his memory, and to ba used in the aggran
dizement of any particular person, be ho
Whig or Democrat, then I leel it my imper
ative duij-'. so far as am able, to make a '
fair and honorable exposition of such ]
bC *Col. Bigler then took up the subject of the
Tariff, and made some blear and forcible re
marks, defining his position to bo the same
as often before expressed, favdrable to tariff
for revenue, as contra-distinguished to a
Tariff for piolection only. Then followed
tiis views of the adjustment measures adop
ted by the last Congress. ' Before proceed
ing on this point," said the speaker, "I de
sire to know if there is a single individual
within the sound of my voice, in favor of
the abolition of blavery, regardless of the
Constitution and the Compromise, and if
there is a single individual opposed to the
glorious bond of Union undei the circum
stances which bind us together as United
Stales?" Not a murmur was hoard, and
Col. Bigler continuing said, "as for myself
I am decidedly in favor of the adjustment
gieasures of Congress, and prior to their pas
sage I so expressed myself in a letter to my
Democratic friends in Berks county, in July,
1850. lam most decidedly in favor of a
faithful maintenance and a thorough execu
tion of every feature of those measures, and
of removing every obstacle ill ,the way of
an efficient administration ot that mature or
the compromise providing for the rendition
of fugitives from labor, and should 1 attain
to the distinguished station for which I have
been nominated by the Democratic party, it
shall be ray pleasure, as it will be my duly,
as far as in me lies, to facilitate the execu
tion of these laws of Congress: lam also
ia favor of cultivating the most friendly re
lations with our fellow-citizens of the South
ern States and of cheerfully extending to
them the full measure of their constitutional
rights, and of taking every other step calcu
lated to protnßfc the peace of the country
and strengthen the bond of our National
Union.
■ " I need not remind you, in detail of the
circumstances which gave existence to these
measures—these are familiar to all. Suffice
it to say that the controversy on the whole
slave question, has assumed a most threaten
ing aspect for the peace of the country,
when great and good men, like Clay and
Cass, Webster and Foole, and others, for
getting their former differences and positions,
j and regardless of personal consequences,
determined to unite their influence and ar
guments to bring about a complete and final
adjustment of these various and complica
ted items of conflict. Their labors resulted
in the preparation and adoption of the Com
promise measures, and there, it seems to
mo, it would be wise and proper to let the
matter rest—and for one, 1 must have other
lights than those boforo mo at present, be
fore I could consent to either disturb or dis
regard those laws.
" That part of the measures which were
certainly adopted in a spirit of compromise,
and which cannot now be disturbed, even
by Congress, is the very best reason why
these liable to change, should be the more
faithfully maintained. Those who complain
ot the constitutional provision for the rendi
tion of fugitives from labor, should not for
get that the compromise measures also make
provision for the suppression of the slave
mart in the District of Columbia; and that
the question of extending slavery into the
Territories, has been in the same way re
ferred to the will of the people who ocoupy
(he soil—(a tribunal which it is not doubled,
—ill decjda in nearly every instance against
its extension.) This feature of the adjust
ment stands on a high and glorious priuciple
the principle on which our revolutionary 1
fathers determined to found all our Republi
can institutions. And what have our South
ern brethren in this adjustment, which may
yet be disturbed ? They have a law provi
ding for the rendition of their fugitive slaves
a measure fully guaranteed to them by
the Constitution—Every chizen of a slave
holding State has a right to claim his fugi
tive by virtue of the Consritulion —he had
that right before there was any Congression
al legislation on the subject, and he would
still have it it all legislation were repealed.
But he might not be able to execute this
right. The fugitive might be secreted from
him of the owner might be prevented from
taking him uj' physical foroe. The legisla
tion of Congress points out to him the pro
gress, and places within his reach the power
of executing this constitutional right.
Truth and Right—God and onr Country.
" It is then not a question of whether the
fugitive shall be returned or not, but one
merely of the mode and manner of accom
plishing this end. The Constitution says,
"no person held to labor or service in any
State, under the laws thereof, escaping into
another, shall in conseq&ence of any law or
regulation therein, be discharged from ser
vice, but shall be delivered upon claim of
the parly to whont Buch labor or service is
due.' Nor is this constitutional provision
one of an ordinaty character, -for we learn
ITis'.orically, by means ot the debates in the
Convention, that this provision was an ulti
matum with a number of States, and that
the Union never could havo bees formed
without itj It. is therefore, that all
Congress cattHiAen this subject, is to make
provision for Inefficient exeoulion of the
Constitution, and that any law that did not
secure au easy and prompt return of the
slave to hi 9 master, would fall short of the
requisitions of the Constitution. Prior to
' 1793, there had been no legislation upon the
subject, and yet the right of the owner of a
slave to come into a free State and carry off
his fugitive was nut The Supreme
Court of the United States in the case of
I'riag vs. The Commonwealth of Pennsyl
vania, laid down the principle that the end
being required, it was for Congress to pro
vide the means of obtaining it. If the Con
stitution thus clearly intended that every lu
gilive from labor should bo returned to his.
master, we are brought to the simgle inqui
ry, will the legislation of Congress do this
—do it efficiently, and in accordance with
the Constitution, and wprk no injury to the
rights of freemen t Believing that it may
do all this, and therefore give to our south
ern brethren the lull benefit of their consti
tutional rights on this point, I am for main
taining the law as il is, and against further
Congressional agitation.
It is always unwise to complain of evils,
without at the same lime pointing to some
practical remedy. Those who complain of
the fugitive slave law, Bhould remember that
the evil which they lament is not so much
in the law as in the Constitution from which
the law springs—that the error against which
they declaim was more the work of out
Revolutionary Fathers than of our present
Southern brethren. Nor Bhould they forget
that if the constitutional provision were left
to executo itselt. the rendition of the fugi
tive would be accomplished in a much more
summary mode than that pointed out by the
late Congress. The <cl. * ---•
come into the Slate, pack up his alleged fu
gitive, and carry him back to ihe State from
whence he fled and try him there. Of this
process there would be much more cause to
complain than of the present law.
"But I have been assailed in various quar
ters and charged with having voted for the
State law of 1847, which is calculated to in
terfere with the constitutional rights of the
south ; which action, it is further alleged, is
inconsistent with my present position. It is
true that I was a member of the Senate at
that time this law was passed ; but I rem
ember very well that, as was my inclination
in reference to questions which were not un
der my charge, and which had been com
mitted to the care of abler and more experi
enced members, I took no part in the pas
sage of the law. It came from tho Commit
tee on the Judiciary, and was explained atp
being rendered necessary by the decision ol
the Supreme Court of the United States, in
the case of Prigg us. this Slate, and circum
stances arising therefrom. Not being a law
yer, I was not a member of the Judiciary
Committee, and had never investigated the
subject sufficiently to fully understand the |
relative powers and duties of the National
and State Governments on this subject; nor
do 1 think that these great subjects were ev
er raised or discussed in the passage of this
law. There was then but little agitation ill
the country on this gteat national qnesliom
and tho full bearing of this law may not
have,been noticed by but a small number of
the members of the Legislature. The clear
est evidence that could exist that there was
no conflict on the subject is fouud in the
j fact of there being no roll on record. I do
not, however, seek to escape responsibility
on these gtouuds. Whatever wrong may
have grown out of this hasty legislation, 1
must bear my proper share of responsibility,
aud fam willing to do so; but 1 shall never
deny intending, by an act of mine, to inter
fere with the constitutional rights of the
South. But if I had even favored the pas
sage ol that law, as alleged, that fact should
have no influence on my present position,
and errors thus unwittingly committed etiould
not be adhered to.
"But have not circumstances changed ?
Were there not circumstances in existence
in 1847 whtoh might be pleaded to some ef
feot, at least, in mitigation, of the error of
the Legislature of that year, which might
have no existence at this time ? I think
there were. The law of 1793, providing for
the rendition of fugitive slavos, entailed cer
tain duties on State officers. The Supreme
Court in the case of Prigg vs. this Stato, held
the opinion that this feature of the law was
of doubtful constitutional authority—or, in
other words, that whilst these officers might
act, Congress could not require them to do
so. Even after that decision, the adminis
tration of the law of 1793 was attended with
great inconvenience. Claimants of fugi.
fives could only have their cases legally dis
posed ot before the United Stales District
Court at Philadelphia or Pittsburg. This
very inconvenience gave rise to the exer
cise of violent means on the part of claim
ants, who disregarding the law of 1793,
threw themselves back on their constitution
al rights, and claimed the right to arrest and
carry off their fugitives wherever they might
find them; and there were instances of the
removal of without reference to
the law or Congress. Combinations were
formed mi different parts of the State for this
purpose, and alleged fugitives violently ar
rested and carried off, without the produc
tion of any evidence on the part ot the clai
mant that they were such in reality. Hence
the law of 1847.
''But this sti to of affairs doeß not now ex
ist.—ln the general adjustment of the slave
controversy, Congress has made ample pro
vision for tho rendition of fugitives, without
the aid of State action. Atul as this law is
part of tho Compromise, upon the obser
vance of which may depend the perpetuity
of our glorious National Union, all Stale le
gislation calculated in the least to embarrass
or delay its oxecution, should, in my hum
ble opinion, be speedily wiped out. If, *s
laid down by the Supreme Court, the right
of a Stale to adopt concurrent legislation, to
co-oporalo in good faith with the aolion ot
Congress, be disputable ground, how perfect
ly it must be that any Stale law or State le
gislation which interrupts, limits, or delays
the execution of the law of Congress, is un
constitutional and void. , .
"In my opinion tbo execution of the con
stitutional prevision lor the rendition of fu
gitive slaves is a concurrent power vosted iu
the National and Stale Governments, aud a
duty enjoined on all; and that, whilst tho
States have no power to prevent the execu
tion of this provision, it is neveiiheless their
right and duty to facilitate the execution of
the law of Congress intended to accomplish
this end.
"And in this connection I will -remark,
that if I were the Executive of this Com
monwealth, I should not hesitate a moment
to sign the bill which the present Executive
officer has now in his possessiont I think
the Executive of this great State, under the
critical circumstances which surround the
Union, should manifest the utmost disposi
tion to facilitate the execution of the laws
of Congress, and thus, as far as in him lies,
relieve the apprehensions of the Southern
people on this subject. Nor can I under
stand why those who seem to feel such a
peculiar interest in the rights of the fugitive
should object to tho Governor signing this
bill. I think, on the other baud, they should
ask him to do.
iitu. r-oa nea nf Stain Prisons, is, pet
haps, a matter of quite as much importance
to the fugitive as to the master, but is of im
portance above ail, to the officer of law ;
and let us for a moment notice the practical
operation. The claimant in a slave-holding
State, takes the preliminary steps am* ob
tains a certificate from the loca' authorities
of his State that he did own and lose a cer
tain described With this he comes
into one of our counties 10 rtio interior, and
makes an arres tof a person whom he be
lieves to bo the man described in the certifi
cate. From tne time the arrest is made up
to the period at which lie can produce the
necessary evidence to make out the identity
of the slavo so arrested, he must be detain
ed. And here, for the first, we find the op
erations of the b'll now in llle hand of the
executive. If he should sigß this bill tlm
fugitive would very naturally be deposited
in the County Prison, where he would be 111
charge of the-public, and whero he would
be accessible to all—where ho could have
counsel, and where thflie who are concern
ed for his rights, could communicate with
him—he is safe from violence—the claim
ant is safe ar.d society is safe. But if the
use of the County Prison be denied to the
agent of the law, does the fugitive there
fore go' free ? By no means, but the effect
is to make him to a very considerable ex
tent, the personal property of the U. S.
Commissioner, who, if he cannot get the
use of the prison, will have to put tho fugi
tive in somebody's cellar, lock him up iu a
calaboose, or tie him up with manacles, and
keep him secreted from the public ; he will
have no counsel—the public will not bo al
lowed access to him ; the Ctfmmiseioner be
ing aloue responsible, he will not take the
hazard of allowing him to be visited by ev
erybody, and he will dispose of the case
with as much rapidity as possible. I am
willing that you should decide which of
these systems is most likely to promoto con
venience irithe execution of the laws, the
peace of the community and the rights of
the fugitive. Now, whilst this practical op
eration is thus rather unimportant; except to
the fugitives, the refusal to remove this ob
struction is more injurious to the feeHngs of
the Southern people than if it contained
sortie important principle, for this they
would be constrained to respect, but it ap
pears to them in the light of aggression on
our part."
Col. Bigler closed his speech by referiing
to the inestimable blessings derived from
the American Union as it is, and was quite
eloquent in hia effort to allay all sectional
jealousies on the question that has created
so much excitement throughout the country.
The meeting was also addressed by several
other prominent speakers.
nr Snooks wonders where all the pillow
cases go to. He eays he never asked a girl
what she was makhg, when she was en
gaged in white sewing, without having for
an answer, "A pillow case 1"
The registration law passed at the last
session of the Legislature is anallily ; Gov.
Johnston not having signed it.
Sunbury American gives its rea
ders the benefit of tho following translation
"from tho Spanish." Exquisite, isn't ill-
See the gay Zepher wantons o'er thy bowers,
Kissing with fondness the half open flowers.
Soft moonlight lies upon the river's breast,
The Bulbil) sings his favorite rose to rest,
The oak smiles in the ivy's close embrace,
The fragrant pines their branches interlace,
The sky her robe upon tho mountain drops
Aim rests in silence on their rugged tops;
Then come to me, again, my bosom's licht,
Lite of my soul, my heaven of sweet delight;
I'lllow my head again upon thy breast,
Near to thy throbbing heart, oh! let me rest,
Clasp me more closely in thy milky arms
While mine as close embrace thy witching
[charms.
Turn to my gmr.o thy eyes' enchanting glow,
From thy sweet tongue let tender whispers
[flow,
To mine with ferver press thy dewy hp
Whose nectar gods in ecstacy might sip,
Yield to me every bliss that love can give,
Save me from worse than death and bid me
[live.
From the New York Mirror.
* Our Life-Time.
TRANSLATED FROM THE GERM IN.
When the world was created, and all the
creatures assembled to have their life-time
appointed, the ass first advan&d and asked
how long he would have to live.
''Thirty years.', replied Nature ; "will that
be agreeable to thee ?"
"Alas !" answered the ass, "it is a long
while ! Remember what a wearisome ex
istence mine will be; from morning until
night I shall have to bear heavy burdens,
dragging corn-sacks to the mill, that others !
may eat bread,-while I shall havo no -en
couragement or be refreshed with any thing
but blows and kicks. Give me but a por
liop of that time, I pray !"
Nature was moved with compassion, and
presented him but eighteen years. The ass
wont away comforted, and the dog was '.he
next to come forward.
"How long dost thou require to live ; ask - I
ed Nature ; ''thirty years were 100 many lor '
the as, but will thou be content with j
them ?"
"Is it thy will that I should ?" replied the
dog.—''Think how much I shall havo to run
about; my feet will not last so lorg a time i
and, when 1 have lost my voice tor barking,
and my teeth for biting, what else shall 1
be fit for but to lay in the corner and
growl ?"
Nature thought he was right, and gave
him twelve years. The ape then approach
ed. |
"Thou wilt, doubtless, willingly live the
thirty years," said Nature ; "thou wilt not
have to labor as the ass and the dog. Life ■
will be pleasant to thee."
' Ah, no !" cried he;' eo it may seem to ,
others, but it will not bo ! Should puddings '
ever rain down, I shall have no spoon 1 I
shall play merry (ricks, and exci'e laughter
by my grimaces, and then bo rewarded with
a sour apple. How often
Ccutc*.-Imjul a jest 1
endure thirty years.
Natufe was gracious, andJtaMMjHMHB
ton. Last came man,
and asked tho measure of ' ,- J
"Will thirty years content
"How short a time !" exclaimed man ;
wjien I shall have built my house, and kin
dfcid a fire on my own hearth—when the
1 shall have planted are about to bloom
and bear fruit—and when lilo shall seem to
mo most desirable, T sliull die ! Oh ! Na
ture, grant mo a longer period !"
"Thou shalt have tho eighteen years of
tho ass besides."
"That is not yet enough," replied man.
"Take likewise the twelve year of the'
dog."
"It is not yet enough," reiterated; man,
"give me more!"
"I give thee, then, the ten years of the
ape, in vain will thou crave more 1"
Man departed unsatisfied.
Thus man lives seventy years. The first
thirty are his human years, and pass swiftly
by. lie is Then healthy and happy—he la
bors cheerfully, and rejoices in his existenco.
The eighteen years of the ass come next,
and burden upon burden is heaped upon
him ; he carries tho com that is to feed oth
ers; blows and kicks are the wages of his
faithlul service. The twelve years of the
dog follow, and he loses his teeth, and lies
in a corner and growls. When these are
gone, the ape's ten years form" the conclu
sion. Tho man, weak and silly, becomes
the sport ot children.
I'rof.tatilo Newspapers.
COL. CARTER, who professes to have a tol
erable fair acquaintance with the leading
journals of New York and Philadelphia,
thinks the following estimate of their anual
profits is not wide of the truth.
N. Y. Tribune, $40,000
N. Y. Herald, 40,000
N. Y Sun, v .j 30,000
N. Y. Journal of Ccmmerctfp i. 30,000
N. Y. Courier, • _ *25,000
N. Y. Express, -7*15,000
Philadelphia Ledger, .* .$6,000
North American,, *•
Bulletin, _ , * MfiUO
Philadelphia Sun, ' 8,<701)
Inquirer, " • -
l'enusylvanian, . 6,000*"
.1, • 4
Total, $265,000. .
REMAKAULE PHENOMENON.—A young man
from Cbesnut Hill, nc,ar this place, told us
'that he picked up a hail stone on Friday,
about the size of a hens egg; which he
broke to pieces, and in the centre found a
piece of grass about one inch long, with
particles of sand surrounding it. The ques
tion arises, how did it get there ?— Easton
Argus.
NUMBER 29.
Groponics.
An oIJ friend of ours, sick and tired of
the care and hustle of a city life, retired
into the country, and "went to farming," as
the saying is. His land, albeit well situated
and commanding sundry romanlie prospects,,
is not so particularly lertile as some we
have seen—requiring scientific culture, and
a liberal use of guano of some sort, to in
duce an abundant yield.
Not long since, while on a visit to the city,
our friond attended .an auction 6ale down
town, and it so happonod they were selling
damaged sausages at the time : there were
some eight or teu barrels of them, and they
| wero 'jAtgoing at fifty cents per barrel I"
w hen the auctioneer, with all apparent seri
ousness, remarked that they were worth
more than that to maqurajaud with. Here,
I was an idea. "SiXtydwiflmd a half," said
| bur friend. "Just a going at sixty-two and
i a half cents—third and last caH gone !"
retorted the auctioneer, "Cash takes them
at sixty-two and a half cts. per barrel."
To have them shipped for his country seat
was the immediate work of our friend, and
as it was then planting time, and the sausa
ges were "getting no better fast," to have
them safe under ground and out of the way
was his pext movement. He was about to
plant a field of several acres ol corn—the
soil of the ptney woods here
was tho spot for this new experiment in ag
| riculture, this new wrinkle in the science of
j gooponics. One "linP' ol sausages being
> deemed sufficient, that amount was placed
! in each hill, accompanied by the usual num
ber of kernels of corn and an occasional
pumpkin seed, and all were nicely covered
over in the usual style.
Now, after premising that several days
have occurred since the corn was planted,
the sequel of the story shall be told in a
dialogue between our friend and one ofhis
neighbors.
Neighbor. "Well, friond, have you plan
ted your corn ?"
"Yen, several days sinoe."
"is it tip yet 1"
"Up ! yes ; up and gone, most of it."
"How is that!"
"Well, you see I bought a lot or damaged
sausages, in 'Orleans, the other day, a
smooth-tongued auctioneer saying they
would make excellent manure if nothing
ele.s I brought the lot over, commenced
planting my corn at once as it was time, pla
cing a sausage in each' hill, and—"
"Wed, and what V'
"And felt satisfied that I had made a good '
job of it. Some days afterwards, I went
out to the field to see how my corn was
coming on, and a pretty piece of business
I have made in trying agricultural experi*
ments."
■'Why, what was the matter ?"
"Matter ? the first thing I saw, before
reaching the fluid, was q lot of dogs ikcmnc
rascally
whelps had scented out the business, and
they have dug up every hill by this time-
If I could set every dog of them on that ras
cally auctioneer, I'd be satisged."
The Itistug Generation.
It was said by somebody—John Neat, wo
believe, for ho is always uttering quaint
things from that huge package of brains
planted on his shoulders—that thero were
no boys and girls, now-a-days, but that they
sprung out of ihe mother's arms into men
and women. We confess that, odd as the
idea is, there is a little too much fact at its
base. The boys are eager to reach man
hood, which they are apt to think consists in
smoking cigars, chewing tobacco, drinking
toddies, and rolling oaths, as sweet morsels
from off their tongues. The girls are equal
ly eager to attain the glories of womanhood,
which consists in wearing elegant dresses,
spinning'street yams, going to parlies, and
—and—shull we say it !— getting hatbands..
Well, it is out, and, upon Ihe whole, we'll
let it sland, though we incur thereby tho
peril or having our ears pulled.
So the one class are ever in a hurry Jo cast
thdir jackets for long tailod* coats and their
candy for cigars ; and the other to step out
from the caterpillar chysalis of pantalotts
and short dresses, into the full blown butter
fly beauty of womandom.
"But, "the more haste the worse speed
and we advise-the boys and girls to hold on
to their bread and-butter life just as long as
they possibly can. They will novor be sa
happy as now.
TUB UNION SOLD— Mrs. I'arlttgton. 011
being told lh".t Mr. Ritchie had sold, 'The
Union,' fexclaimed: "Alas! I feared, he
would do something awful to edentify him!
I wonder if he sold the people with it, and
if 1 have got to become a nigger slave? If
soi I shall emulate <o the South were they
know how to treat the poor critters." And
Mrs. Parling'on sighed deeply and said no
more.
A CURIORITV. —The following is a literal
copy of a certificate recently granted by the
School Directors a certain district in Ohio, to
a female teacher.. It is a rich document, and
proves that school-masters* a e needed as
well as school-dames, there :
"The unders!gnors, Bein Chosen to In
spect ' The Scholi teacher at
found her Capable of teaching Iteedin, and
E. Ritbmatick, and has visited the ' Scholi
I and sas she has kept Regular Howers." *''