The Columbia Democrat. (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1837-1850, June 22, 1844, Image 1

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    71 ..
I liavo sworn upon tlio Altar of God, eternal hostility to every foruiOf Tyranny over the Blind of Man." Thomas Jcflernoii
Volume VIII.
OrrosriK St. Paul's Oiiukch, Main-st
The COT UAUUJt DEMOCRAT will be f.vr.rn Ntiitinlnu .,,'.,
TWO DOLLARS per annum payable
,ir ichm ix mivancc, or i wo Dollars
Fifty CcntsAf not paid within the near.
No subscription will be taken for a shorter
... in..... .i i' 17
jibuvu wiui jtx manias; nor any aiscon
linuance permilted,until all arrearages
are discharged.
J1D VER TI SEMENS n of exceeding a
square will be conspicuously inserted al
vug uuimijur tiivjirsi inrcetnseriions
itnd 'Pinrnltimfine ,io Via
" - - "-fy vcit.u auiae
aitr.nt nutrinn. tiTJ HU
J ' " T twoUr U(OLUU(
vinde to those mho advertise In the year
oe post pain.
I'rom llio I'liiladclpliia Dollar Newspaper.
The Child's Portrait.
Il lonkcili on me placidly,
ThM sweet nntl simple face
Not a shallow dims its Ioniums,
Not a cloud is on its grace.
Hut the purity of peaceful thought
Is in that childish gaze,
And the smile is full of innocence
Thai on the red lip plays.
It is a fa co where friends have looked
Willi many a fear and caro,
For all that life might bring to one
Whose dawning was bo fair.
A father's eye had followed him
With fond and earnest pride,
And a mother's glance had loved to dwoll
On the bright ono by her side.
And fervently their visions sought
His future to unroll
And prayerfully ihoir spirits asked
A blessing on ils scroll ;
And that the light of many years
Alight rise upon his gaze ;
Alas ! we know not what wo do
In asking length of dayi !
A sad and weary-hearted man
That lovely boy becamo
A worshipper of worldliness,
A smilor upon shame !
A dreaming and a doubling one,
A scorncr 'mid his woe,
A scoffer at the holiest things
The human heart can know.
He lived to loso the very hope
Of ever winning rest
And they who wished that he had died
Were those that loved him bosl.
Fur he had not a promise left
Of all his childhood gave,
And hopcleBS were the bitter tears
That bathed the skeptic's grave !
How little dream we, as we gaze
On youth's unsulllicd brow,
The mournful record time may writo
On the heart so tranquil now.
Ah ! meekly bhould our spirits bow,
When the pure and lovely die,
For lenghlh of life but soils the soul
WI1060 home is in the sky 1
" I'll climb tho frosty mountain,
And the i c I'll coin the weather;
I'll wrench the ruiubow (rum the skies,
And tie both ends together.'
I'll mount the clear cerulean,
To shun the templing gypsies;
I'll play at bath with the bun und moon,
And fright yo with eclipses."
A weak mind is always conjuring up
misfortunes, ui)U makes ustl) wrolchru uc
I'utu its ijiuu,
' Jonathan,' a cunning and shrewd land
lord in tho western part of New York, was!
unfortunately tho owner of a most mischiev'
ous and snappish cur, that aniwercd to tho
laminar name or Watch. Worried with
Hie vexatious tricks of tl'u dog, the m?n con
eluded that Watch must dio. As there it.
more than one way to hang a dog, the old
man was pondering in his own mind as to
the best mode, when, to his no small sur
prise and pleasure, iho tandem team of i
Yankee pedlar drove to the door.
' I can't sell you any clocks to day, cap. 1,
mister V
'I don't knowreplied the landlord; 'I'm
nearly out of cash, and it would rathei
incommode mo to purchaso at present.1
' Wal, I'm not particular about cash,
enn t I swap with yc for something for
somo skins, or dried apples, or a'most an)
thing V
' 1 havo a watch,' said the landlord, 'that
perhaps 1 should like to swap for a good
Tho pedlar quickly brought in an assort
ment, and tho old man, having selected oik
io his fancy, commenced the'trace.
Landlord 1 should bo willing to swap
my watch fur this clock,if you like; it is on.
in tho field now, with one of my workmen,
nut 1 can get il soon.
Pedlar How old is it ?
L. Not more than 5 or (5.
P. Whal kind of a thing is il to run?
I. I'll warrant her to run as wel as she
would wheii now.
P. Got a key to il !'
L. Yes, a sicel one.
Wal,' said the pedlar, 'you may have
that clock you've picked out there, for youi
' It's a bargain,' said tho landlord, and he
waul lor his watuh.
Ha went out, whistled a moment for hir
dog, which was soon cau ght, anrf an oli,
trunk key having been put around
his neck, with a red string, ho was piescn
ted to his new master.
The pedlar first stormed considerably
but having been satisfied that the dngV
name was Watch, ho fastened his Watel.
io the axletrco of his wagon, and was oil
for tho land of steady habits1'
A farmct's wife, in speaking of the stnnrt
ncss, aptness, and intelligence of her sun, ;i
lad six years old, to a lady acquaintance,
' He can road fluently in any part of the
Bible, repeat iho whole catechism, and weed
onions as well as his father.'
' es, mother,' added tho young hopeful,
and yesterday I licked Ned Kuwson, throw
ud the oat in the well, and stole old IliucK
ley's gimolet.
' Behold, .Miss Flora, how glorious na
ture looks in all her bloom ! The trees arc
filled with blossoms, the wood is drcuscd in
its green livery, and the plain is carpeted
villi grass and flowers !'
' Yes, Charles, I was thinking of the
same thing. These flowers arc ibtmluliuns,
.inu wiien uioy aro "ailiared and put in h
pot with a picco of good fat pork,
make the but green in tho world 1'
Tho lollowing is the last grand effort of
transcendentalism. It is a luminous rcn
dcriug of the vulgar and common (dace
term of ' clear out;' ' Enubiliitc the atmos
phuTO of your presence by calling into ac
lion your quicseont motive power, and
transferring tho material elements which
compose your terrestrial organization to
some other portion of this mudano
1 1 contend tho gentleman is entitled to
dm Jloor!' as the member of Congress said
when ho knocked his opponent down with
' John, tho oak, it is said, will 1 1 v o iiftcon
hundred years.
So will yew? replied John.
I'lum Sam Slick in Ktigluml.
Did ever I loll you Ihoslory of the
''Eldprjind i ho grave-dipnoi- ?"
" Nevei," I replied ; 'but hero we
arc al our lodgings. Come in, and tell
il Io mc."
" Well," mI1 he, I miisl have a
glass of mint julip fust, Io wash down
that ero disappointment about tho mare.
It was a dreadful go thai. 1 jisl losl a
thousand dollars by it, as slick as grease.
Hut it's an cxciiin' lliing is a lioltiri'
race, ton. When you mount, hoar the
word ' Start !' and shout out ' G'lang."
ind give tho pass word."
Good heavens ! whal a yell ho perpe
trated again. I put both hands to my
ears, to exclude tho reverberations of il
from the walls.
" Donl be sheered, Squire; don't bp
skecrcd. Wo aro alone now; there is
no marc to loso. Ain't it pretty? li
makes me feel all dandery and on wires
" Hut the grave digger ?' said I.
" Well, says he. ' iho year afore I
knowed you, I a-goin in tho fall,
down to Clare, about sixty miles below
Annapolis, Io collect some debts due Io
me thuro from the French. And as I
was a-joggin5 on along tho road, who
should I overtake but Elder Stephen
Grab, of lieechmeadows, a mounted on
a considerable of a clcver-lookiu' Ua:k
mire. The Elder was a pious man; a
luaht ho looked like otic, and spoke like
one too. Ills face was as long as the
moral law, and pchaps an inch longer,
ml as smooth as a hone; and his Voice
was so soft and sweel, and his lonrup
moved so ilyon its hinges, you'd a llio'l
you might a tiusted him with untold
goui, ii you uiuiv't cue whether you
tivor got it agin or no. lie had a bran
tew hat on, with a brim that was none
if the sm illus!, to keep the sun from
r.akiu' his inner man wink, and hi
o-to-meeim' clothes on, and a pair of
silver mounted spur., and a beautiful
vhite er.ivat, lied behind, so as Io havt
io bows lo it, and look meek. If then
was a good man on airth, you'd a said
il was him. And ho seemed to feel it;
t ud know it loo, lor there was a kind o
look o'u iumph about him, as if he had
conquered ttio jvn Une, and was con
siderable well sali.kfi"d with himself.
,( Il'are you,' siis 1' 'Elder, to-day?
Which way are you Irom t
" Fiom the General Christian Asscm
bly,J Miid he. 'to Goose Creek.' Wi
had a 'most refrcshin' lime on't.' Ther
was a great 'oiilpjurin' of iho spirit.'
' Well, that's awlul, sato J, 'loo.
The magistrate oiig'it to see to that;
.iin'l right, when lolks assemble thai
way lo woiMup, lo l-o a-sellin' of rum,
mil gin, anil brandy, and spuds, is it?'
I don't mean that,' says he, 'allho
jt'rhapshcic was too much of that wick
od tralhc loo. I mean the prcachin'.
Il was very peeoweiful; Iherc was 'ma
ny siuneis saved
" I guess there was plenty of it,' sais
I, 'oiiIps.h thai neighboi hood has mucl
improved since I knowed it lasl.'
" h's a sweet thing,' sais he. 'Ilavt
you evor 'made profession,' JMr.SIic k?1
" Come, sais I to myself, 'this is cut
tin' il rather too fat. I must put a slop
to this. 1 his ain't a subject lor cover
cation wilh such a chcairu', caniin'
nippociytical skunk as this is, Yes,'
jiis I, 'long ago. My profession is thai
of a clock maker, and I make no prcten
sinn to uolhiir else. Hut come, lei'
water our nosses hero ami liquor our
And wo dismounted, and gave 'cm a
ill op to wel their mouths,
"Now,' sais I,a lakin out of a pockc'
pistol that I generally travelled with, !
think I II '.aku a diop of grog;' and ar
ter holpin' myself, I gives the silvei
cover of the flask a dip in tho brook,
(for a clean rinse is bettor than a duly
wipe, any lime), and sais I, 'will you
have a little of the'oulpuui in of the spir
it?' Whal uo you say, Jlder V
"Thank you,' says he, 'friend Slick.
I never tuuuli liquor, it's agin our rules.
"And hu stooped down and filled li
wilh walcr,atid look a mouthful, i$- then
mukiir a faco like a frog a fore ho goes
to sing, aiiUwclliu' his cheeks out like
a Scotch uagpiner, lie sjnl it all out.
Says lie.1' That is so warm, it makes mc
sick; and at I ain't otherwise well, from
the celestial exhaustion of n
mecliii', I believe 1 will lake a little
drop, as medicine.'
" Confound him ! tf he'd a s.uil he'd
only leave a little drop, it would a been
more Mke the thing, fur ho e'en u'mo.M
mpliqil iho whole into Iho cup, and
Ir.inklil oir clean, without wiiikin'.
" It's a 'very refrcshin' limp,' sais I.
'ain't il ?' Hut he didn't make no an
swer, bus I, 'that's a likely beast of
yourn, Elder,' and I opened her mouth,
mil tooh a look at her, and no easy m.n
iur nunier, i ten you, ior sue neiti on
like a) bear Iran with her i.iws
"She won't suit you.' aais he, with n
imile, ' Mr. Slick.'
" I guess not,' sais I
" Hut she'll jisl suil the French,' sai
" It's lucky she don't speak French
1 "en, sais I, 'or they'd soon find he
tongue wag ton big for her moulh.
I mil critier will never seo five-and-
iwenty, and I'm a Ihinkin' she's thirl
year old, if she is a day.'
u I was a thinkin', said ho, wilh a sh
i , ... . . ' y
iook out o' iho corner ot his eye, as t(
her ago warn'i no secret to him, 'l wa
a Ihinkin u's lime to put her off- and
she'll jit 6Uit the French. Thev hanle
much lor bosses to do, in a giniral way
hut to ride about; and you won't sav
nolhiii about her agp,will you? Il might
onciamnily a sale.
" Not 1,'sais I, 'I skin my own foxes
and lei other folks skin theii'n. I have
enough lo do lo mind my own business
wilhoul interferin wilh other people's.'
" She'll jisl suit the French,' sais he.
' they don't know nothin about hosse,
or any thing else. J hey aro a simple
people, and always will he, for their
priests keep 'em in ignorance. It's ai.
awful thing to see them kept in the out
er porch ot uaruness that way am
" I giirsf you'll put a new pane ol
glass in their porch, sais 1, 'and hell
omo o' them lo see heller :for whoever
gels thai mare, will have his eyes open
ed, sooner nor he bargains for, 1
'bais he, 'she ain't a bad marc; and
if she could eal hay, might do a good
leal ol vvoik yet,' and he gave a kmdci
chuckle laugh al his own loke, thai
founded like the rattles in his throat, il
was so dismal and deep, fot he was one
of them kind of fellers that's too good
io lane, was ateve.
1.' Well the horn of grog he look be
gan to onlooson his tonguejand I aa oui
of him that she came neardyin' the win
ter afore, her Icelh was so bad, and that
ho had kepi her all summer in a ih ki
pasiuic up lo her fellocks in while elo
ver, and gmn' her ground oats, and
Indgian meal, and nothin to do all sum
mer;.md in the fore part of tho fall,bilcd
polatoes, and he'd got her as fat as
seal, and her skin as slick as an otter's
She fiirly shincd agin, in Iho sun.
"She'll jut still the French,' said Iip
'Ihevarea simple people and don
know nothin, and if ihcy donl like ihf
mare, they must blamo their priests fm
not Ipachin 'em belter. I shall koe
ivilhin the strict line ot tuilh, as he
conies a Lhrislian 4unn. 1 scorn to take
man in.
" Well we dialled away arlcr (hi
fashion, he a openin' of himself and mi
walkin' intohimpiid we ingced alone
till we came to Charles Sarrio's lo .Won-
tagon, and there was th? matter' of
thousand French pcodo gathered there,
chatlcrtii' and laiiglun'ind nunrrcllin
ntd racin', and vvrastliu', and all a eiv
in tongue, like a pack of village dogi-
when an inilgian conies lo (own. 1
was town mectin day.
" Well there was a crillcr there, call-
id hy nickname, 'lioodish Grcevoy,' u
nounted on a white pony, ono o' tin
c.n icst little screamers you ever see
iuco you was Oorn. tie was a Iryin'
io gel up a race, was Ooodish, and ban
enn' every one that had a boss to run
wilh him.
" His faco was a forlin' to a nainlei
(lis foihead was'liigh and iiarrcr, there
on only a long stnp o' lawny skin, in o
Une wilh his nose, tho rest bum' covei
ed with hair, as black as ink, and as iley
is a seal's name. His brows was thick,
husky and ovet hanging, like young
brushwood on a did. and onderiiealb
was two black peppin' little eyes,' thai
kept a movin' about, keen, good natuted
and roguish, but so jsI into his kull,
and looked like tho pyes ofa fox pepp
ing out ol his den, when he warn't to
homo lo company his elf. Uij nose
was high ,s'iarp and creeled, like Ih.
luck of a renpin' hook, and gavo a pit.
2,y sight of character to his face, whil.
his thiiinish.lips.lhat closed on a straiglp
' " ' cuiiii, a u down
it the other, shewed, if his dand nr Wan
raiscd.hc could bo a jumpin', tarin,'
wij.ji.-iiuug ucvii ii uc rnope. Hip
pint of his chin piojccted ami turned un
;er,lly, ns if It ixpected, when Godish
losl his teeth, lo rise in the world a
rank next to the nose. When good
natut' sal on the box, and drove, il
K4r,. n It,. I P.. . ...1. . il x.
. .., wiien will iMcIC Wa
coachman, I guess it would bu as well
to give jlaster Frenchman dm rnnfl
'Ho had a red cap on ; lis board hadn'i
iiecn cut since last sheep shearin,' and
he looked as hairy as a t.nrier; his shirl
collar, which was yaller IlinneL fell on
his shoulders loose.and a black handker-
chcr was tied round his neck, slack
like a sailor's. He woro a found iackei
ntd loose Irowprs of homespun, with no
waisicoai. ami ins towers was held up
by a gallus of lealhei on one sido.and of
old cord on iho other. Either Goodish
Had growed since his clothes was made,
oi nujickci and Irowsers warn'i or
"poakin' larm's for they riidn'
meel by ihrec or four inches, and
the fchiil showed at ween them like a yal-
vi iiimiui ojau luutlll llllll. un; Juel was
covered with moccasins cf cniannec
mo osc hide, and one heel was 60t ofl
with old spur k, looked slv and wicked.
Ho was a sneezer thai, and he flourished
his great long white of a whip stick, that
looueu line a nshin' rod, over his head,
and yelled like all possessed, he was n
caution, that's a fact.
'A knowin' lookin' Mile hoss, it wa,
(oo, thai he was mounted on. Its tai
was cut close off to the slump, which
quareu up Ins rump, and made him
look awful strong in the hind quarters.
Mis mane was'hogged' which fulled oir
ihe swell and crest of his eais beie
cropped, the crillcr had a game look
iboul him, There was a pioper good
onderatandin' between him & his rider.
they looked as if they had growed to-gelhcj-,and
made ono crillcr half hoss,
half man, wilh a touch of the devil.
'Goodish was all up on oend by what
he drank, and dashed in and out of tin
crowd ar ter a fashion, that was quiti
cautionary, callin' out, 'Here comes 'tin
grave-digger.' Don't beskeeied, if an
of you gel killed, here is Ihe bos Ilia
will dig his grave for nothin.' Who'll
run a lick of a quaiter of a mile, for
pint of rum. Will you run? siid he, i.
ipuukin' up lo the Elder, 'come, Ict't
run, and whoever wins, shall go ihe
'The Elder smiled as sweet as sucat
candy, but harked out, he was loo old,
lie said, now lo run.
'Will you swap bosses, old broad
cloth then?' said iho other, 'because if
you will, here's al you.'
'btevc, look a squint at pony, lo see
whether that cat would jump or no, hui
the cropl ears, ihe slump ol a tail, tin
rakish look of Ihe hoise, didn't jisl al
'ogeihpr convene to t lie lasip, or iln-
nidified habits of tho preacher. Tin
word not, hung on his lips. like a worm v
appl", jisl ready to drop the fusi shade!
but before it lei go, tho great strength,
me spiyncss, and Ihe oncommon obedi
ence of pony lo the bit. scorned to kind
er balance the objections, while the sar-
lan and onliniely com! ih.-.l l ung over
lis own maro, during the comin' winter
lealh by starvation, turned Iho scale
Well,' said he, slowly, 'if we
yach other' beasts, friend, and p:, a-
ii-ee as lo Ihe boot, I don't know :is I
wouldn't trade; for I don't care lo mis..
noils, bavin' a plenty of boss sjock on
hand, and perhaps you do.'
How old is your lios.?1 said Hip
(t ,t;..
I rai'o it,' sais Sieve. Tn,(
Wheellock, I believe, brought her lo our
. 'How old do you'lnko her to be?'
'Poor critter, she'd tell VOtl llPI'anir
I she could.'said hp, 'for she knows li..ti
but she can't speak ;ind I didn't suo her
wnen Mic was loaldcd.'
How old do you think?'
'Age,' sais Steve, 'depends on usp.nni
on yeais. A boss- at five, ir ill ,.u,.,i :..
ld; a hoss al eight, if well used' is
'Sacry footry.!sais Goodish 'why don't
iVuiiibu' Q0"
you speak oit like a man? Lie or oit
le, how old is she?'
Well, I don't like losay,' sais Sievo
I know she is eight for sarlain; and
I may be she's nine. I didn't raise i I.
rou can see one that was.'
'A long banter then Fgrowcd out of
'ho 'hoot money.' The Elder nsked
7 10s. Goodish swore he wouldrr-'t el vo
thai fur him and his boss together; that
I they were both up lo auction that bless
ed minute, thev wouldn't brink it. Tho
Elder hung on it, as long as there was
any chance of ihe boot, and then fort
(he iirouml like a man, onlv eivim?
in inch or so at a lime; till ho drawed
up and made a dead stand, on ono
'Goodish seemed willing lo come (o
larms loo, but like a prutlent man, re
solved to lake a look at the old mire's
mouth, and make some kind of a guess
it her age; bill tho critter knowed how
lo keep her own serecls, and it wat
ever so long, afore he forced her j nvj
open, and when ho did, ho came plaguy
near losm' ol a linger, lor his curiosity;
mil as he hopped and danced about
with pain; ho let fly such a string of
laths, and sarcy-cussed the Elder and
his mare; in such an all fired passion,
hat Sieve put both his hands up to his
ears, and said, Oh. my dear friend,
don't swear; don't swear; it'd very
wicked. I will lake your pony, I'll
ask no boot; if you will only promiie
not to swear. You-shall have Iho mam
as she stands. I'll give up and swap
even; and there shall be no after claps.,
nor ruin bargains, nor lecantin;' nor
uother; only don't swear.
Well, the trade was made, ihe saddles
bridles was shifted, and both panic mount
ed iboit now bosses. 'M. Slick, 'sais Steve,
who afraid he would loso the pony, if ho
staid any longer.'Mr.Sliek.'sais he.'ihe lean
said is the soonest mended, let's bu a mov
in', this scene of noise and riot is shockiii'
to a religious man, ain't ii?' and lie. let go a
roaii, as long as Iho embargo a'most.
'Well, we had no sooner turned to go,
ban the French people sot up a cheer that
made all rinij agaip; and they sung our,
'La Fossy Your, and shouted it again and
agin ever so loud.
'What's that? sais Steve.
'Well, I didn't knew, for I never lieerd
tho word, afore; but it don't do to say you
don't know, it lowers you in the eyes of
other folks. If you don't know what
mother man knows he is shocked al your
ignorance. But if he don't know whal
you do, he can find mi exeuse in a minute.
Never say you don't know.
'So,' saii 1, 'they jabber so ovcrlastin'
last, It am l no easy matter to bay what they
mean; uui n sounus like 'good bye,' you d
letter turn round and make 'em a bow,
lor they ate very polilo people, is ihe
v 'So Sieve turns and lakes olThis bat, and
makes them a low bow. and they laifs won
than ever, and calls; out again, 'La Fossy
Your Ho was kinder ryied.was the Eldc'r
(lis honey had begun to farmer)!, and smell
vinegery. 'May bo, next Christinas,' sais
he, 'you won't larf so loud, when vou
find the mare is dead, Goodish and "the
old mare arc jisl alike, they aro all tonguu
them crilters. I rather think it's me,' says
lie, 'has tho right to larf, for I've got the
best of this bargain, and no mistake. Tin
is as smart a n httlo boss as ever I see. I
know whero 1 can pin him oil' to great
advantage. I shall make a good day's work
of this. Il is about as good a boss trade as
ever 1 made, i he Wench don't know
nothin about bosses, ihey are a simple peo
pie, their priests keep 'cm in ignorance on
purpoio, and they don't know 110111111','
lie cracked and biagged considerable,
.mil as wu progressed we came to Montagoii
Bridge- The moment pony gut fool on 11.
He stopped short, pricked up latter eeinJs 01
His eais. snorted, squeeled and refused 1.1
omlge sin inch. The elder Elder nut mad.
lie first iua.ed anil nailed. and soli Aawder
ed him, and then whim ami snurred and
tliraslied him llku any limn?. 1'unv unl
inad tuo, lb 1 hos-cs has tempers as well as
r.iuurs; so ne turned to; ami kicked tight
straight up on ocml, like Old Scratch; and
kept on without stoppn.' ,0 sent tho
Elder nglii slap over his head slaniciulieu
urly.uu llic.broad or bis bark into iheiver;
nul be floated down thro' Hie biidg'e juJ
-.eiambled out al I'otheriide,
Creation! how he lookud. Ho was to
mad; ho was ready lo bile over; and as 11
was he smoked in the sun, il,e a tea kt tilu
His clothes sluek close down to lum; us u
uut's fur does to her skin; hen she's out
m ihe raiiijund every nop ho took his bouts
v cut i-quash, like un old woman ehuruin'but
ter;aud his uct trowers chafed with a n0b0
like a wel flappin' sail. He was a show;
and when he g.n up his hnsi.; and held 011
to ins inauc.aiid ur-t 1 ud no ,,,iU