The Columbia Democrat. (Bloomsburg, Pa.) 1837-1850, December 14, 1839, Image 1

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I have sworn upon the Altar of God, eternal hostility to every form of Tyranny over the Mind of Man." Thomas Jefferson
PRINTED AND PUBLISHED BY II. WEBB.
Volume CII.
OFFICE OF THE DEMOCRAT,
Oppositk St. Paul's Church, Main-st.
The COLUMBIA DEMOCRAT will be
published evert Saturday morning, at
TWO DOLLARS per annum, payable
half yearly in advance, or Two Dollars
Fifty Cents, if not paid within the year.
jr&o'Xffiytri'plion will be taken for a shorter
period than six months ; nor any discon
tinuance permitted, until all arrearages
are discharged.
ADVERTISEMENTS not exceeding a
.iruare will be conspicuously inserted at
One Dollar for the first three insertions,
and Twenty-five cents for every subse
quent nscrtlon. lCJd liberal discount
made to those, who advertise by the year.
LETTERS addressed on business, must
be post paid.
THE 1IO MR Ol.' THE FAItMEK.
Still let tnc live among the hills,
The rocks, the trees, the flowers,
Where I have passed Miy early years,
My childhood's happy hours.
How oft beneath the aged oak,
Near to my father's dwelling,
IIa"c 1 reposed with kindred youth,
Some playful, stoiy telling.
The bird3 above would plume their wings,
And raise their happy voices;
Oh, sure it is a pleasant place
Where every thing rejoices.
Surrounded by the friends I love,
And free from every fetter;
I am an independent man,
And a wish for nothing better.
My little children round mc'spnrt,'
So blooming, bright, and healthy,
I often think that nature's gifts
Have made me very wealthy.
My wife is all that she should be
Kind, gentle, prepossessing;
I'm sure, if ever man was blest,
Mine is the greatest blessing.
TO A HANK NOTE.
I will not take thee ragged elf,
In payment for my labor
Your villany's revealed itself,1
You're robbed myself and neighbor.
Your very face is all a lie,
Your promise but a bubble;
You raise the price on all I buy,
And plunge mankind in trouble.
And when wo ask you for the cash
How well the matter's mended!
We find yonr Dank " is broke to smash,"
Or, hang you! you're suspended I
For banks the farmer grows his corn
The laborer gives his earning;
The student, like a sheep, is shorn,
In spile of all his learning.
" Don't tread on my toes." From the
.days of Franklin to the present lime, news
paper publishers have found that they could
tTiot keep in the palh of duty without ligur
;ately treading on the toes of somebody :
"Draw any character, and some will find
Their natures with your drawings to agree;
iCuree any sin discovered m mankind,
Your naighbor utters ' that was meant for
' It often happe-a that general remarks are
appropriated by some individual whom the
cap happens ,to fit closely, and who imine-
, j diately begins to fume at the supposed per
aonality, whilo the plain truth may bo that
the publisher has never heard of the sensi
tive being, or having heard of him, consid.
era him fat below tha dignity of a para
graph. When a man has barely enough
sense to catch a glimpse of hi own failings,
he is apt to thir.k these failing peculiar to
himself, and vainly imagines that he ia of
MLOOMSBURG, COLUMBIA
sufficient importance to make his imbecili
a matter of public record. The conductors
of newspapers seldom think it worth their
while to rebuke the vices or follies which
are confined to a lew individuals, unless the
situation of those individuals is such as may
enable them to do extensive mischief by
their own example or influence. If this ob
vious truth was well understock by many a
shallow, blustering trivial and unworthy
person, he might save hiinsef from much
ridicule and from many real mortifications,
by simply bearing in mind the matter of
fact that he is too contemptible figure in a
newspaper unless he should necidently ap
pear there under the head of "Police Re
ports." For our part when we have a par
ticular allusion to any person, wo generally
express ourselves with sufficient perspicuity
to take away all uncertainty respecting our
true meaning. Hut when our general re
marks appear to have a particular applica
tion, we feel highly gratified to find that
we have observed human nature to some
purpose and that our pictures of life are re
alized and verified by living examples.
Ledger.
Winter in Russia. In Russia the wea
ther is very cold during the winter. At
Petersburg, persons in the open air fre
quently perish by the severity of the cli
mate. It is not uncommon to hear two
people conversing in the following man
ner, on meeting in the street : 'I beg leave
to acquaint you that your nose is freezing,
to which the other probably answers, 'I
was just going to observe to you that yours
is already frozen.'
On sur.h occasions, both the snffercrs
stop, and rub each other's nose, either with
a piece of flannel or with a handful of
snow, in order to restore the circulation of
the blood. After this service mutually ren
dered, the parlies separate with the usual
ceremonial bows and salutations.
One day, an Italian arrived in Peters
burg for ihe first timo in the month ofDe-"
cembcr. He wrlkcd hut a short distance
from the house before his nose became
completely fiozen. A good natuied peas
ant seeing his mishap, took up a handful
of enow, and without saying 'by your
leave' instantly commenced rubbing the
stranger's nose in the most liberal man
ner. The Italian, far from being grateful for
the peasant's application, mistook his hu
mane but somewhat blunt procedure for
an insult and began to beat him severely,
A crowd soon collected round them, and
at last the Italian was made to compre
hend the motive of the peasant's opera
tions. The Italian now lamented his hasty se
verity, and giving the poor nose rubber
some money. they were soon good friends.
The Italian was rejoiced at the preserva
tion of his nose, the loss of which would
have subjected him to some iaconvenicnee.
He retreated homewards, holding that or
gan fast with his hand, and resolved nover
to expose il to a similar danger. The peas
ant he well repaid for his timely application
as well as for the beating which he received
in consequence.
Political gabble. Most of our country
exchanges have ceased to bo newspapers,
and turned to political placards; (don't
inist.ike and call it blackguards) every page
is filled wiih such flummery as "Freemen,
to ihe polls" "Citizens, do your duty"
"Timothy Tumblebug, the people's caddi
dato !" "Inhabitants of Frogtown.awake"
"Friends of Obeduh Pumpkinskull, be
ware!" with fifty other ad caplandum head
for paragraphs, which the publishers of
these barren sheets suppose will atope for
the lack of intelligence, and everything
else for which newspapers were orginally
designed A pig swimming down a stream
cut its own throat vrith its fore paws ; in
like manner these editors, swimming down
the stream of polities, do execution upon
themselves, and that is the only good ob
ject they generally accomplish. By conver
ting their publications into reservoirs for
COTOTY, PA. SATUKDAY, DECEMBER 14,
personal -.nil party abuse, they make them
selves haled as enemies by their opponents
and despised by their own partisans who
look upon them as beasts of burden, to be
maintained scantily while their labor is use
ful, and turned out to perish when there is
no more occasion for their services. After
having the very seats of their pantaloons
worn out by repealed (tickings, their noses
pulled till the elasticity of that organ has
become exhausted, and their backs slashed
lill their coats resemble the skin of the ze
bra these poor wretches arc discarded,
their subscribers drop oil', and their adver
tisements are discontinued because the
election is over and their "friends" can do
without them Ledger.
MAJESTY OP LAW.
The following beautiful cnlngy on " the law," is
extracted fiom an article in tho Southern Literary
messenger:
"The spirit of the law is all equity and
justice. Ina government based on true
principles, the law is the sole sovereign of
a nation. It watches over its subjects in
their business, in their recreation, and in
their sleep. It guards their fortunes, their
lives, and their honors. In the broad noon
day and the dark midnight, it ministers to
their security. It watches over the ship of
the merchant, though a thousand leagues
intervene ; over the seed of the husbanman
ahandoncd for a season to the caith; over
the studies of the student, the labois of the
mechanic, the opinions of every man. None
are high enough to offend with impunity :
none so low that it scorns to protect them.
It is throned with tho king, and sits in the
seat of the republican magistrate ; but it al
so hovers over the couch of the lovely, and
stands sentinel at the prison, i crupuiouslv
preserving to the felon whatever rights he
has not forfeited. Tho light-of the law il
lumines the palaeo and tho hovel, and sur
rounds the cradln and the bier. The strength
of the law laughs wickedness to scorn and
spurns the iplienchmcnts of iniquity. The
power of lite law crushes the power of man
and strips wealth of unrighteous immunity.
It is the thread of Dandalus, to guide us
through the labyrinth of Running. Il is the
spear of Ithuried, to delect falsehood snd
deceit. It u the face of the martyr, to
shield us from ihe fires of persecution ; it is
the good man's reliance : the wicked one's
dread, tho bulwaik of piety, the upholder of
morality the guardian of tight, the distribu
tor of justice. lis power is irresislable ; its
dominion indisputable. It is above and a-
round us, within us ; we cannot fly fiom
its protection ; wc cannot avert its venge
ance. "oucn is the law in its essence : such it
should be in its enactments ; such, too, it
would be, if none aspired to its administra
tion but those with puie hearts, enlarged
views, and cultivated minds."
DIALOGUE.
Broaching matters by degrees.
Mr. II. 11a ! Steward, how are you my
old boy. How do things go on at home !
Steward. Had enough, your honor the
magpie's dead.
Mr. II Poor mag ? so he's gone. How
came he to die ?
Slew. Over-ate himself, sir.
Mr. II. Did he, faith ? a greedy dog,
why what did he gel he liked so well ?
Stew. Horse-flesh, sir; he died of eat
ing horse-flesh.
Mr. II. How came ho to get so much
hor3c-flesh ?
Slew. All your father's horses, sir.
Mr. II. What ! are they dead too t
Stew. Ay, sir; ihey died of over-work.
Mr. H. And why were they over-worked,
pray ?
Stew. To carry water sir.
Mr II. To carry water, land what were
thoy carrying water for ?
Slew. Sure sir, to put out the fire.
Mr. II. Fire ! what fire ?
Slew. Oh, sir, your father's house is
burned down to the ground.
Mr. II. My father's house burned
down ! tnd how carac it apt on fire ?
Slew. I think sir it must have been
torches.
Mr. II. Torches ! what torehei T
Stew. At your mother's funeral,
Mr. II. My mother dead !
Slew. Ah poor lady, she never looked
up after it.
Mr. II. After whet I
Slew. The loss of your father.
Mr. II. My lather gone too ?
Slew. Yes poor gentleman, he took to
his bed as soon as he heard of it.
Mr. H. Heard of what?
Stew. Ihe bad news, Sir, and please
your honor.
H f T 1ft 1 .
mr. u. wnau more miseries, more
bad ncws4?
Stew. Yes sir, your bank has failed,
i f. i .
iiuu your crcan is lost, and you are not
worth one shilling in this world. I made
bold sir, to come and wail on you about it,
for I thought you would like to hear the
news.
A marriage at first sight.'Yhc Mil-
ledgcville Journal states that a marriage
took place recently in that city, under the
following circumstances . "A lady from
an adjoining county made her appearance
in the morning in our city, for the purpose
of selling chickens, bulter and eggs, when
she was accosted by a "jolly swain," "brim
full of love, with the pleasing interrogato
ry, "Dear madam, will you marry me ?
Astonished, but not displeased, the fair la.
dy blushingly answered in the afiimalive.
A license was immediately procured, par
son or justice employed, and the happy
couple were buckled to each other for
life."
SelfAbsoJulion.--Sfoh ithe power in
the human mind bf adopting itself to cir
cumstances, that we can reconcile ouraeJves
at leasl; partially, to our own crimes. . The
slings of conscience would be intolerable,
could we not lay some flattering unction to
our souls, and teal relief from self-delusion.
It may be doubled whether the grea
test villain in the woild over thought him
self much worse lhan some of his neighbors,
or was ever without his share of those ex
tenuating pleas, suhteifuges, and shufllings
in which the mind is so subtle a casuist.
An amusing instance of the extenuating pro
cess is aflorded in the case of a poor woman
who was brought bufore a justice for apply
ing a name, that shall be nameless, to a fe
male neighbor. 'You arc the last person,'
observed the worthy magistrate, who
should have used this apporbrioiis word ;
'for if I have been rightly informed, you,
yourself had a natural child two or three
years ago.' 'Yes your worship,' whimper
ed the culprit,' 'but mine was a very Utile
one,'
Mothers and Daughters. It was a judi
cious resolution of a father, as well as a
most pleasing compliment to his wife,
when on being asked by a friend what he
intended to do with his girls, he replied I
intend to apprcnlice them to their mother,
mai incy may learn tno art ot improv
ing time, and be fitted to become like her
wives, mothers, heads of families, and
useful members of society.' Equally just
but bitterly painful, was the remark of the
unhappy husband of a vain thoughtlces,
dressy slattern. 'It is hard to say il, but
if my girls aro to have a chanre of growing
up good for any thing, they must be
sent out of the way of their mother's ex
ample.' Care for Inflamed eyes, Pour boiling
water on some elder flowers, and steep
them like tea ; when cold, put three or four
drops of laudanum into a small glass of elder
flowers, and let the mixture run into the
eyes three or four times a day, which will
become perfectly strong in the course of a
week, if this remody is constantly applied.
An exchange paper says that among the
various species of lying, that of lying in
bed too late is too common.
1839.
Niimlicr S3.
Married to aZary.-Of all tho "strong1
or "thick" bloods in Ireland, none is thick
eror more fiery and proud than that which
s the veins of the numerous decayed
scioiit of the royal raco of tho "O'Sulli-
vans." An old gentleman, who lived near
Ardgill, is out author's authority for tho
following capital illustration of a sort of
pride by no means peculiar to Ireland. We
have seen in equally rampant, and nearly
as ridiculous, in certain parts of our own
country. When new roads were forming
near Bearhavtn, the old gentleman, who
tells the talc, happened to pass by t small
party or labourers, just at the dinner hour
all were silting sociably together, con
suming iheir humble but warm meal, which
their wives and families had broug.it but
one was silling apart and alone disconsolate
on a rock.
"How comeo it, my honest fellow that
you are not as well provided as your neigh
bours, have you no wife to brine you Tour
dinner?"
"Troth, then, it is I tint have a wife, and
that's the rase ai why ray dinner is not af
ter coming.'1
"0 poor woman ! I suppose the is lyinj
in, or she is sick ?"
"Arra mushi, not at all, your Honour;
troth she is neither sick, nor sore, nor sor
ryI'll be bound, master, ahe is as
big and as brave a body at any rnan'e
wife from Bear to Banlry : but I'll tell
you. master, whal'a the matter she's a
lady,"
"A lady why, what do yo tmn by a.
lady?"
"Arra now don't you know sure, she's
of thick blood, ahe cornea of tho O'Sulli
vans." "Weilrbut lady as she if, the O'Si&i
vans must eat she's not above dining
she has mouth tad teeth like ether peo
ple.' 'Oh ! then il is she that has. Ate och
then, let Biddy O'Sullivan alone for that;
a better man than ever I was, she wmild me
out of house mid home ; and then, sir, she
would break the bank in drinking lay. But
though, sir, ahe will ale dinner with me
aye, and after me she is not the one to
bring il to a poor body that's after working
all the day that would be bringing down
her quality stomich loo much, your hon
ourby this pipe I tumid in my fiat, she
would as soon carry Sugar Loaf on her
head, Hungry Hill in her hand, as bring lo
me (and I have been a good man to her) my
dinner.'
'This is a strange story friend."
"Strange is it? why it'e as true as yon
are there.'
' Well, hut if she don't work or g o a
bresd, she is surely a gooi wife at home
she knits your stockings, tike mends, she
makes for you."
" Och, the sorrow one stich knit my
stockings, wash, mend, make for me !
.May I never sit under Father Mahnny'a
knee, or ever see mass, if one hele in my
stockings she ever darned, or even one need
leful of thread did she ever fill in wending
or making for me."
"It would appear, then, lhatyou have a
heavy bargain of this lady-wife of yours."
" Why, what signifies complaining ?ur
she's mine, and it's the will of God, and
that's enough. But barken your honor,
(and here the poor fellow lowered his voice
to a whisper and inclined his head towards
my ear, lest any of the royal O'Sullivans
ahould overhear,) by the powers, if it wert
to be done over again, I'd sooner go on board
a man-of-war, and live under a cat-o'-ninetails,
than be married to a i.adt."
ETBSBBEESE X
At a shop window in the Strand, there
appears the following notice ' Wanted too
apprentices who shall bs treated as one ef
the family.'
Picture-room. An Irish gentleman naT.
ing a small picture-room, several persons
desired to see it at the same time. " Faith,
gentlemen," aaid he, " if you all go in, it
will not hold you,"
is