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pottitat.
OLD DOG TRAY.
A VOMAAR SONG
The MOrn of life is past,
And evening comes at last—
It brings me a dream of a once happy day,
Of merry forms I've secs
Upon the village green,
Sporting with my old Dog Tray.
Cho.-01d Dog Tray's ever faithful,
Grief cannot drive him away, [find
He's gentle, he's kind ; I'll never, never
A better friend than Old Dog Tray.
The forms I called my own,
Have vanished one by one— [away ;
The love'd ones, the dear ones, have all pass'd
Their happy smiles have flown,
Their gentle voices gone,
I've nothing left but Old Dog Tray.
When thoughts recall the past,
His eyes are on me cast ; [would say,
I know that he feels what my breaking heart
Although he cannot speak,
I'll vainly, vainly seek,
A better friend than Old Dog Tray. .
3 i ill[imou!i.
'Captain Gregg's Adventures,
A WONDERFUL ESCAPE.
On the banks of the beautiful Mohawk.
where the town of Rome now stands—stood,
during the Revolution, a strong fortification,
erected, in connection with others, in 1755, to
keep open the communicatn between the Mo
hawk Valley and Lake Ontario and to protect
the Indian trade. At the opening of the contest
between the colonies and the mother country,
Fort Stanwix was almost in ruins. Situated
as it was at that time, on Old extreme outskirts
of the white settlement, it was an important
post, yet it was not until the spring of 1777.
Early in the spring of the year, Thavendane
gen, or Brandt, the chief of the Sachem of the
Six Nations, made his appearance in the valley
of the Mohawk, with a large body or warriors.
and from his own confession, it became evident
that the Indians had been induced by the
British, to take up the hatched in their contest.
and that the settlements in that beautiful region
of country would be the objectof assault. Con
gress saw the necessity of protecting the
northern and western frontiers, and General
Schuyler was directed to repair Fort Stanwix,
and erect others, should he deem it necessary.
Colonel Dayton was detailed by Schuyler to
Port Stanwix. It was while he was engaged in
the Tyron county militia, in its repairs, that
the incident I am about to relate occurred.
The commandant of one of the companies of
militia, was Captain Gregg, a young man of
noble appearance and possessed of an iron con
stitution, which in connection with‘ his temper.
fume habits and happy disposition, enabled him
to pass through„wilh life, an ordeal such as
man never before pesSed through.
Notwithstanding- the immediate vicinity of
the troops; the 'lndians in small parties were
constantly watching for opportunities to cut off
stragglers from the garrison, and even children
were not exempt from death by the tomahawk
and scalping knife.
Regardless of the danger, and despising the
foe whOm he hated with the ardent hatred of a
frontiersman, Gregg started from the fort one
morning in company with three comrades, for
the purpose of shooting game. One of his com
panions was a boy about thirteen, by the name
of Wilson, who, from fear that they might meet
with Indians, was sent back to the fort. He
lived to becoine an ensign in the American
army, and at the surrender of Cornwallis, was
appointed to receive the colors of the various
British regiments. • •
Gregg and the two soldiers, relieved of the
care of the boy, proceeded to the neighboring
woods, where they entered with zest upon the
pursuit of game. They had been thus engaged
but a short time, when, simultaneously, the
crack of three rifles sounding almost one,
brought them all down. 'The two soldiers were
killed outright, and Gregg received a ball whick
passed through his left arm into his body, and
ho fell to the ground, seriously and dangerously
wounded. Raising himself on his arm, he
looked round for bis comrades, and saw an In
dian in the act of scalping one of them, another
bearing off in triumph the reeking trophy from
a second, while at the, same moment that he
made this discovery, the leaves parted, and a
third red skin warrior, with his face smeared
with war paint, his head decked with feathers,
and his tomahawk raised, rushed upon him.—
Ho succeeded in dodging the first blow aimed
at his head, which took effect in his back, in
a deep wound. The second and third
were more sure, and fell witt crushing force
upon the fore part of.hia head, and. he sank into
IatUGM. Rillniq2ll
I)tuotF to Torol tiO annul :71/tIIIo, Igrirttlfart, Triburatioo s Initigemtnt, 311arkrb5,
VOLUME IX.
insensibility. How long he remained in that
condition he was unable to tell, but when he
awoke to consciousness ho was suffering intense
ly acute pains in his head and found that his
dog—a small Scotch terrier that had accom
prinied him—Was licking his wounds. He drove
him off, and for the sake of easing his smarting
wounds, he after incredible exertion, and faint
ing twice on the way, managed to crawl to the
body of one of his companions, upon which he
laid his bead and here hp expected to die. his
faithful dog, meantime expressed a sympathy
almost human, and by whining, barking and
licking his wounds, endeavored in his way, to
show his desire to relieve his master's suffer
ings. Instead of this, however, he only added
intensity to his pains, by irritating and inflam
ing, instead of soothing his bleeding head.—
Hoping to iid himself of the animal and die in
peace, ho said to him :
" If you think so much of me, why don't
you go for help."
•
As if endowed with reason for the occasion,
the dog seemed to understand him, and started
off towards the fort. At the distance of a mile
in that direction, he came upon two men who
were fishing. Running up to them hexaught
theni by their clothes with his teeth, pulling
and tugging at their garments, and then run
ning in the direction of the woods, looking back
to see if they followed him. Their first feeling
was one of fear, thinking, perhaps, that the
-animal was mad, and it was some little time
before they seemed to understand the dog that
they should follow him. Alley did so at last,
and now the faithful brute fairly danced and
capered with joy. Running before, he led them
directly toward the woods, now and then look
ing back to see if- they were coming. After
getting some little distance into the deep shade
of the forest, they became fearful of the Indians,
and taking council of their fears were about to
turn back. The excitement of the dog was
now extreme. Ile danced about them in a per
fect fever of anxiety ; pulled at their clothes ;
run before ; barked, and sitting down on his
haunches, gave utterance to one of those long,
AliCiV r ii i one m.. 'can describe ; and finally, finding
they were about to return, he actually jumped
upon them in the direction he desired they
should go. No one could behold his actions—
which lacked only language to express the in
tensity of his desires—without feeling that
something urgent demanded their presence in
the deep recesses of the woods,And they finally
concluded to follow him and seethe end of it.—
He ran around them, danced, and capered, and
licked their hands, looking up into their faces
with such a look of gratitude, as amply
repaid them for the apparent risk they ran.
In this way he led them where lay his now
insensible master, and the corpses of his two
comrades. They immediatelyrecognized them,
and perceiving signs of life in the Captain, they
proceeded to form a litter to convey him to the
fort. This they did by cutting two long poles,
and laying- boughs upon them, upon which
they carefully laid his insensate form, and after
hiding the bodies of the others by the side of a .
decayed trunk until they could return for them,
they started for the fort. 1)r. Thatcher, iu his
journal says :
He was a most frightful spectacle. The
whole of his s9,lp was removed ; in two itlaceit
on the fore pat of his hCad, the tomahawk had
penetrated his scull ; there was a wound on his
back with the same instrument; besides a wound
in his side, and another in, his arm with a
musket ball."
Of course, no hopes whatever were entertain
ed of his recovery, but contrary to all human
expectation, he rallied, and although dur
ing the period of many months, while he was
stretched upon an invalid's couch, he suffered a
hundred deaths, yet he did finally recovered,
and lived a convincing witness of the barbarity
of the savage red man. His dog, by whose
means his life had been preserved, was ever after
his dearest and most . cherished friend.
Lost tho reader should hare any doubts of
the authenticity of this incident, or think it
highly colored, we would refer him to " Camp
bell's History of Tyron County," " Thatcher's
Military Journal," " Lossin's Field Book,"
and other authorities, which will confirm all I
have described.
EARLY MARRIAGES.
The following remarks by Dr. C. M. Fitch,
delivered at a recent lecture, are too good to be
lost. Speaking of the hereditary causes of eitrn
sumption, the Doctor remarked : •
" I believe it to be utterly impossible to find
a perfectly healthy child born of delicate"; sickly
parents. • The unsound constitution of the pa
rentis usually transmitted with increased in
tensity to the offspring, and no character of
morbid Predisposition, is more surely and more
unfailingly transmitted than a predisposition,
to pulmonary consumption. When we consider
the influence that the mother's health must
exert on the healih of her children, it is strange
that so little attention should be • paid to the
physical education of girls. Why from the
1P1)111211111,
hour of her birth, is a female child to be sub
jected to one eternal imprisonment 7 . Why is
she to be cooped up within doors, confined to
patch work and nursing her doll, and taught to
consider it quite unlady-like, to move faster
than the dignified gate of some superanuated
dowager? Turn your girls out of doors, let
them play at ball and trundle the hoop, and
laugh and shout as. much as they please ; they
will be finer ladies for it at thirty, even if not
quite so graceful at fifteen. By the laws of
Lycurgus the : Wise and immortal law giver of
the Spartan Republic, the most especial atten
tion was paid to the physical education of
women, and no delicate sickly woman was al
lowed to marry. Supposing a provision like
this would be carried into effect here ! What
an army of unmarried ladies we should very
soon see !
If a young man wants to choose a wife, let
him invite the lady he has in view, to take a
walk, a long one, and when he comes back, if
he finds his companion obliged to go to bed with
a headache, let him look somewhere else for
wife, unless he is fond of paying Doctor's bills.
Speaking of early marriages, the Doctor re
marked, "In this country very few ladies are
fit either physically or mentally to become
mothers lopfore they reach the age of twenty
one, or twenty-three ; but so precocious are
our young ladies, that if they happen to pass
twenty without having made definite arrange
ments, they begin to consider themselves old
maids, and before a school-girl is fairly out of
short dresses and pantalettes, she is looking
up a beau."
Among the Ancient Germans, than whom a
finer race of men, physically, perhaps never ex
isted, it was death for any woman to marry be
fore she was twenty, and were this law to be
enacted and rigorously enforced among us, the
amount of suffering, the actual amount of human
life that would be saved thereby, is past all
computation.
Tastes Dittbr.
The following extract, which we make from
pp s last lecture before tile
Young Men's Institute in this city, shows.the
widely different' Ways persons will take to do
the same thing :
In Italy you will see a man 'breaking up his
land with two cows, and the root of the tree
for a plough, while he is dressed in skins with
the hair on. In Rome, Vienna, and Dresden,
if you hire a man to saw wood, he does not
bring his horse along. He never had one, or
his halter before him. He puts one end of the
saw on the ground, and the other on his breast,
and taking the wood in his hand, rubs if
against the saw. It is a solemn fact, that in
Florence, a city filled with the triumph of art,
there is not a single auger, and if a carpenter
would bore a hole he does it with a red hot po
ker. This results not from the want of indus
try but of sagacity of thought. The people are
by no means idle. They toil early and late,
men, women, and children, with an industry
that shames labor-saving Yankees. Thus he
makes labor, and the poor must live.
In Rome charcoal is principally used for fuel,
and yoti' will see a string of twenty mules,
bringing little sacks of it upon their backS-,
when one mule could draw all of it in a cart.—
But the charcoal vender never had a cart, and
so he keeps his mules and feeds them. This is
from no want of industry, but there is no com
petition.
A Yankee always looks haggard and nervous
as if lie were chasing a dollar. With us mon
ey is everything; and when we go abroad we
are surprised to find that the dollar has ceased
to be almighty. If a Yankee refuse to do a job
for fifty cents, he will probably do it for a dol
lar, and will certainly do it for five. But one
of the lazzaroni of Naples, when he has earned,
two cents and eaten them, will work no more
that day if you offer him ever so large a sum.—
lie has earned enough for the day and wants on
more. So there is no eagerness for making
money, no motive for it, and every body moves
Kisses are an acknowledged institution. It
si as natural for • folks' to like thorn, as it is
for wale run down hill, except when it is so
cold at it freezes and can't run at all.—
Kisses, like faces of phifbsophers, vary. Some
aro hot as a coal of fire, some sweet as honey,
some mild as milk, some tasteless as long
drawn soda. Stolen kisses are said to have
more nutmeg and cream than any other sorts.
As to proposed kisses, they are not liked at all.
We have made it our business to inquire
among our friends, and they agrelQlijh us,
that a stolen kiss is the most agreeable—that
is, if the theft is made by the right person.—
Talk of shyness and struggling—no wonder,
when some bipeds approach ! it is miraculous
that ladies do not go into ciivulsions. We
do not spe,eh altogether from experience, but
from what we have heard others say. We have
been kissed a few times, and, as we are not
very old, we hope to receive, many more." •
ALLENTOWN, PA., MAY 9, 1855.
Kisses.
Chained to a Ball.
I was once passing the barrack yard, in the
city of Quebec, and heard the sound as of
soldiers marching. I climbed up the wall, and
peeped over. There was a company of soldiers,
and, a short dktance in advance, of them, a
single private, with a cannon ball chained to
his foot.
He had been guilty of some misdemeanor, and
was condemned to the task of parading a cer
tain number of hours each day, with this irk
some companion.
When I see a young man, just on the thres
hold of life, loitering away his time in unprofit
able amusements and
,unworthy associations,
which consume his precious seed-time, and
burthen him with evil influences * which will
probably go with him, and form a thorny pillow
when he lies in the silent grave, I think that he
is chaining himself to a ball. When a young
man cuts off the restraint of early impressions,
and enters the bar-room, there to spend his
evenings, and perhaps his nights, in dissipa
tion and companionship with sinners, whose
god is Bacchus, and whose oblations are profane
jests and godless sneers and licentious songs, I
turn aside and weep, that he will madly forge
and weld the links with which he is chaining
himself to a ball.
When I see a young man elastic with hope,
whose path points to certain success, or to un
dying fame, seeking relaxation froM the fatigues
of business or the application of a student's
life, at the gaming table, or the theatre, or on
the bosom of unhallowed delights I do verily
feel assured that man is chaining himself to a
ball which will roll with its victim into a pre
mature grave.
When I see a man suffering important en
gagements to slip by without fulfilment, from a
habit of carelessness or want of energy, I feel
assured that crc long experience *ill prove to
him he has been chaining himself to a ball.
When a young man runs into debt, and is
negligent of paying his obligations when due,
or lets his business take care of itself while he
is Attending. to some trilling employment. will
and to his sorrow, that lie has been chaining
himself to a ball.
When a young man forms a habit of extra
vagance and of living beyond his means, and
thus squanders the bounties put into his hands
fur a virtuous and faithful stewardship, he
will find that he is wasting theuncreated capi
tal of a futui e which is not his, and is, moreover,
chaining himself to 'a ball which will grow more
rusty and burdensome every day.
When I see a young woman, bright in all the
loveliness of virgin prime, spending her time
and consuming her intellect, in chasing the fic
tions of the novel, or the follies of the romance,
oh, how gladly would I break the chain which
binds her to such a ball !
When I see a young woman neglecting the
duties of a fireside, which should be a little
paradise of bliss, and threading the mazy walks
through the highway, " that she may be seen of
men," I say to myself, " she is
chainin git herseir
to a ball !" •
When that fair maiden looks into a mirror
and admires the beauty pictured there, and
sets her heart .on its outward adornment, I
think she, too, is chaining herself to a ball.
When, in short, I see a young woman spend
ing her time in that which profiteth not, under
teachings and allurements of vanity or fashion,
I cannot avoid saying to myself, " she is chain
ing herself to a bull."
Reader ! old or young, man or woman, take
those chains off your limbs and be free !
How much Tobacco is Used.
The present annual production of tobacco is
estimated to be 4,000,000,000 Pounds ! This
is all smoked, chewed, or snuffed. Suppose it all
made into cigars, one hundred to the pound, it
would produce 400,000,000,000. Four hun
dred billions of cigars ! .
. Allowing this tobacco, unmanufactured,..to
cost on the average ten cents a pound, and we
have $400,000,000 expended every year in pro
ducing a noxious, deleterious weed. At , least
ono and a half times as much more is required
to manufacture it into marketable form, and dis
pose of it to the consumer. At the very
lowest estimate, then, the human family ex
pend, every year, one thousand millions of dol
lars in the gratification of an acquired habit, or
one' dollar for every man, woman, and child,
upon the earth !
This sum would build two railroads around'
the earth, at a cost of twenty thousand dollars
per mile, or sixteen railrondslrom the Atlantic
to the Pacific. It would build one hundred
thousand churches, costing $lO,OOO each ; or
half a million school-houses, costing $2,000
each ; or one million of dwellingd, costing
$l,OOO each. It would employ one million of
preachers, and one million of teachers, giving
each a'salary of $5OO. It would support three
and one-third millions of young,men at college,
giving each $3OO per annum for expenses.. We
leave others to fill out the picture. Is this
annual orally to increase or decrease in future, ?
Reader, how much do you contribute to this
fund I
MJMI3ER 31
Sunday Schools.
No institution contributes more to the peace,
prosperity, morals and respectability of a com
munity than its Sunday Schools. The law can
only punish, while Sunday Schools prevent
Crime. Colleges and SeMinaries and Public
Schools, it is true, enlighten the mind and de
velope mental" genius, but the especial objects
of the Sabbath Schools instruction are the heart,
the life, the destiny, the soul. The natural
demand Of soul for a religion of some sort—for
a Divinity to do homage to, is far greater than
the aspirations after fame or wealth. A kind
heart is to be more desifed than a wise head,
where the two qualities cannot be combined.—
The conquests of genius are the flashing of livid
lightning that cracks the gloomy thunder cloud
and leaves the world to wonder at his power.
But the heart that feels the thrill of kindness,
that is good, and true and pure, beams like the
unobstructed rays of mellow moonlight upon
the world, imprting pleasure, elevating the de
sires, subduing the passions, and leading men
to imitate its virtues. Not even the family
circle is so well calculated to improve the heart
of a child as the instruction of the Sabbath
School, forhere grater truths than ever parent
uttered are tsiught, and the child learns, what
many men never. learned, " who is my neigh
hor ?" To a faithful teacher there is no more
delightful employment than to teach children
—susceptible as they always are—the simple
truths of the Bible, and when we contemplate
The silent influence which these Sabbath School
instructions have in forming the future cha
racter of the man or woman, the position be
comes tone of the greatest importance and i•e
sponsibility.
Jesuitism and Great IngeHect
The Jesuits have been in existence three
hundred years ; they have had their pick of the
choicest intellect of all Europe—they never
take a common man when they know it ; they
subject every pupil to a severe ordeal, to as
certain whether ho has the required stuff in biro
to make a strong Jesuit out of. They have a
scheme of education masterly in its way. But
there has not been•a great original man produced
in the company ofJesuits from 1554 to 1855.
They absorb talent enough, but they strangle
it. Clipped oaks never grow large. Prune the
roots of a tree with a spade, prune the branches
close to the bole, what becomes of the tree ?
The bole itself remains thin, and scant, and
slender. Can a man be a conventional dwarf
and a natural giant at the sametime? Case your
little boy's limbs in metal, would they grow ?
Plant a chestnut in a teacup, do you get a tree ?
Not a shrub even.' Put a priest or a priest's
creed, as the only soil for a man to grow in
he grows not. The great God provided the
natural mode of operation—do you suppose He
will turn aside and mend or mar this universe
at your or my request ? I think God will do no
such a thing.— Theodore Parker.
The Jewish Sabbath.
It is unlawful to ride on horseback or in n
carriage—to walk more than a mile from their
dwellings—to transact business of any hind--
to meddle with any tool—to write--to play
upon any musical instrument—to bathe—comb
the hair—and even 'to carry a pin in their
clothes which is unnecessary. These, and n
great many others, are complied with by • the
most rigid. There is one command in the law
of Moses to which all Jews must scrupulously
adhere: " Ye shall kindle no fire thougheut
your habitations upon the Sabbath day."—
t Exodus xxxv. 3.) Consequently they neither
light a firo, or a hump, or a candle otitlie Sab
bath day, nor eat food prepared on that day—
all must be done on Friday. As it is impassible
to spend the Sabbath in cold climates without
fire or light, the Jewish faMilias who keep ser
vants make it a point to have a Gentile in their
service to do these things ; and among the
humbler classes a number of families gonerally
unite in securing the service of a Gentile neigh
bor for the day. Nothing could wound the
the conscience of a Jew more than to be under
the necessity of putting fuel on the fire, or
snuffing his candles, on the Sabbath.—Thr
British Jews.
THE SPIDER'S LOVE FOR lIER PROGENY.— All
her limbs, ono by one, may be torn from her
body (without forcing her to abdndon her
hold of the cocoon in which she .has wrapped
her eggs ; and if; without mangling the moth
er, it bo skillfully removed frOm her, and sud
denly thrown out of sight, she instantaneously
loses all her activity, seems paralyzed, and coils
her tremulous limbs as if mortally wounded.
If the bag be returned, her ferocity and strength
are restored the moment she has perception of
its presence, and she rushes to her treasure to
defend it to the last.—Professor Re7llZ.
TA most interesting sight to see, is that of
a young lady with " lips like rubies," and
with " teeth of. pearly whitedess," and , with
cheeks that have stolen the " deep carnation of
the deathless rose," with her. mouth full of gin
gerbread!
The Crimea.
The Crimea is a peninsula of 8000 square .
miles, possessing a greater variety of natural
resources than perhaps any territory of equal
extent in Europe. Three sides of it Are washed
by the Black Sea, and the northeast aide tot
the Sea of Azof. It forms part of the it uissialf
government of Taurinda ; and its preselat Coed
tion, as a country neglected, depressed, and
debased, is a standing testimony' to the evil
influence of RusSian rule. So far from keeping
pace with the progress of the age, the Cri
mea
I s sadly retrograded. Her products are
shipp/
off in considerable quantities to Russia';
much f them extorted from her in return for'
the Czar's protection. The fertility of some
parts of the Crimea is so great, that several of
the most valuable fruits of the earth can be
cultivated, with but slight labor, in the greatest
perfection, and to an astonishing extent of in
crease. This was known to the ancient Greeks,
and was taken advantage of by Greece under .
her system of colonization. Six centuries be
fore the Christian era, they had begun to form
colonies on the northern shores Asia Minor ;
and we learn from Strata), and other writers
of antiquity, that they preferred this peninsula,-
from its containing so many inducements to•
industrial. enterprise, particularly in the soil,
which, it is affirmed, was found to yield a return.
of fifty times the seed. At one time, indeed, it
it was considered the granary of Greece, espe
cially of Athens, whose territory, being of
small extent, and indifferent fertility, was
unable to maintain its large population by its
own produce. There is a deep classical interest
in this subject. Demosthenes has, more tharr
once, had his eloquence excited by it. . Besides
breadstuff's, it still exports hides, morocco, and
other fine leathers, silks, stuffs of eastern fabric'
and pattern, camel's hair, wool skins, dried
fruit, wines, and an endless yariety of other
products, for which the Crimea with its appur
tenances, has comparatively inexhaustible re
sources. The population has become a very
mixed one, and on this account is only the more
likely to sustain an advanced civilization and
industrial progress. The largest population m 6.
doubt, consists of Moguls and Turks, united
under the common designation of Tartary ; but
there are Greeks and Russians, and even Cer-•
mans, in considerable numbers among them,.
and these latter have for some time past, it is
said, been rapidly increasing.
Long Sermons.
These after all, remarks the IVinsted Herald.
are the great mistake of clergymen—the crying
sin of the pulpit. People will not read long,
dry disquisitions upon secular subjects, and
religious subjects are listened to with pretty
much the same soft of uneasy cars. The truth
is, half an hour of good, hearty laboring its
about as much as ordinarily sensitive sinners
can stand at one sitting, and when sermons are
habitually protracted beyond that length, those
to whom they are perhaps the most important
will habitually keep away. The value and
efficacy of sermons consist in *hat is remem
bered, not in that which is forgotten ; and a
half dozen curt, epigratninati sentences, with a
small relish of eloquence and rhetoric, is worth
more upon a promiscuous congregation than a
whole days's work of preaching under the ten
hour system. Deacons and classleaders may
be suited with ten hour system sermons, but
sinners won't be—and there's the difference.
Long sermons and thin congregations are in
separable._
Courting in a Right Style.
" Git cout you nasty puppy—let me alone,
or I'll tell ma !" cried out Sally,— to her lover
Jake —, who sat about ten feet from her
pulling dirt from the chimney jam.
" I ain't techin on you, Sal," responded
Jake.
" Well, perhaps you don't mean to nuthcr—
do ver ?" ,
" No, I don't."
" Caws you are too tarnel scary, you long
legged, lantern-jawed, slab sided, pigeon-toed,
Bangle-kneed owl, you—haint got a tarnel bit
of sense, get along home with you:"
" Now, Sal I love you, and you can't help it,
and if you don't let me stay and court you, my
daddy will sue your'n for that cow he sold
him t'other day. By jingo, ho said he'd do'
it Sal "
" Well look here, Jake--if you want to Court
me, you'd better do it as a white man does
that thing; not setting off there as if you
thought I had pizen."
" How on airth is `that Sal 7"
" Why side right up hero, and hitg and kilss .
me, as i 8 you really had-some of the bone and•'
sinner of a man about you. Do you 'spotie a
woman's only made to look at, you stupid fool
you ? No they're made for ' practical results,'
as Kossuth says—to hug and kiss, and sich
like. " Well," said Jake drawing a long
breath, if I must I must, for I do love you, Sal,"
and so Jake commenced siding up to her, like
a magpie poker going to battle. Laying his
arm gently on Sal's shoulder, we thought we'
heard Sal say :
" That's the way to do it, old hose ; that is •
acting like a white man."
" Oh, Jerusalem a-n-d pancakes !" exclaimed
Jake, " if this ain't better thin any applesass .
ever marm made, a darn sight ! Crack-en !
buck-wheat cakes, slap jacks, and lasses ain't
no whar' long side of. you, Sail. Oh, how I love
you !" Here their lips came together, and the'
report that followed was like pulling a horse's'
hoofs out•of the mire. •
pia Yankee editor out west says : The
maroh of civilization is onward—onward • like
the slow but intrepid steps of a jackass to a
peck of oats.
[I:7'A new style of bonnet is to be produced
among the " spring fashions." It consists of
a cabbage leaf trimmed with radishes.
J7A genius in Now Bedford is' fitting up R .
steamer for the purpose of towing icebergs to.'
India, whore they sell for six cents s'pound:'