Wyoming democrat. (Tunkhannock, Wyoming Co., Pa.) 1867-1940, December 04, 1867, Image 1

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    WptHiitg Bcmorrat.
Ppming flnnorat.
A Democratic weekly __
paper, devoted to Poll V jr4t
tics News, the Arts i|
aad Sciences Ac. Pub- "■ g'fLjF- \
lished every We does- ' ' tpS&
day, at Tunkhannock I
Wyoming County,Pa ~*J \ *• iwlw
Therms—l copy 1 year, (in advance) $'2.00 ;if
paid within six months, $2.50 will be charged
NO paper will be DISCONTINUED, until all ar
rearagesre paid; unless at the option of publisher.
<Ona square one or three insertions S* 50 ,
Every subsequent insertiou less than S 50 ;
ABVERI ts.NO. as may be agreed upon.
PATENT MECICISES and other advertisements oy j
the column :
One column, 1 year, S6O
Half column, 1 year 35
Third column, 1 year, 25
Fourth column, 1 year, 20
ltusiness Cards of one square or less, per yea r
with paper, 58
vw EDITORIAL or LOCAL ITEM advertising—with- ;
out Advertisement —15 cts. per line. Line ral terms
made with permanent advertisers.
TOR'S NOTICES, of the usual length, $2,50
OBITUARIES,-exceeding ten tin s, each ; 11ELI
OlOUSand LITERARY NOTICES, not ofgcueral
nterest, one half the regular rate 3.
rr A dverti-ements must be handed in by TI ES- J
L)AT NODS, to insure insertion the same week.
of all kinds neatly executed, and at prices to suit
the times.
WORK must be paid for, when ordered
Business Xotices.
LAW Office on Tioga Street Tunkhannock Pa j
. Newton Centre, Luzerne County Pa.
OL, FA ft HI fell, ATTORNEY M' LAW j
• Office at the Court House, iu Tunkhannock I
Wyoming Co. Pa.
* fice ;n Stark's brick Clock Tioga St., Tunk j
nannock, Pa.
• will attend promptly to all calls in his pro
fession. May be found at his Office at the Drug
Store, or at his residence on Putrnan Sreet, formerly
occupied by A. K. Peckhatn Esq.
<X *9 . - -- J
DR. L T. BURNS has permanently located in
Tunkhannock Borough, and respectfully tenders
hi." professional services to its citizens
Office on second floor, formerly occupied by Dr.
.*{ , AND
'Jiy W. 'JiUGEJt, .Artist.
Rooms over the Wyoming National bank,in Stark's
Brick Block,
Life-size Portraits painted from Atnhrotypes or
Photographs —i%etographs Faint;*! in OilCilors
All orders for paintings executed according to or
der, or no charge made.
irr Instructions given in Drawing, Sketching, i
Portrait and Landscape Painting, in Oil or water
Colors, and in all tranche" of the art,
Tuuk , July 31, 'q7 -vgnaO-tf.
The Subscriber having had a sixteen years prac
tical experience in cutting and making clothing
now offers his services in this line to the citizens of
RICHOLSOR and vicinity.
Those wishing to get Pits will fir.d bis shop the
place to get them.
The undersigned having lately purchased the
" BUEIILER HOUSE " property, ha 3 already com
menced such alterations and -improvements as will
render this old and popular House equal, if not supe
rior, to any Hotel in the City of Harrisburg.
A continuance of the public patronage is refpeet
fully solicited.
THIS establishment has recently been refitted an
furnished it* the latest style Every attention
nil be given to the comfort and convenience ui those
who patronize the Houc
T. B. WALL, Owner and Proprietor.
Tupkhannock, September 11. 1861.
Win. H. CORTRIC.HT, Prop'r
HAVING resumed the proprietorship of the above
Hotel, the undersigned will spftre no efforts
sender the house an agreeable pdace of sojourn to
all who may favor it with their custom.
June, 3rd, 1863
r>. B. B ART LET,
The MEANS HOTEL, te one of the LARGEST
and BEST ARRANGED Houses in the country—lt
is fitted up in the most modern and improved style,
and no pains are spared to tmtke it a pleasant and
agreeable stoppngi p|aco for all,
v3THv. ... *
Scrofula and Scroftilous Diseases.
Frr.rn Finery Files, a iretl-known merchant of 0
ford, Maine.
" I have sold large quantities of your SARSAPA
KILLA, but never yet one liottie which failed of the
desired effect and full satisfaction to those who took
it. As fast as our people try it, tliey agree there has
been no medicine like it before iu our community."
Eruptions, Pimples, Blotches, Pustules, Ul
cers, Sores, and all Diseases of the Skin.
From Her. Kobt. Stratton, llristol, England.
•' I only do my duty to you and the public, when
I add my testimony to tiiat Jfou publish of the me
dicinal virtues of your SAHSAKAWLI.A. My daugh
ter, aged ten, had an afflicting humor in her cars,
eyes, and hair for years, which we were unable to
cure until we tried your SARSAPARILLA. She has
been well tor some months."
From .Mrs. Jane F.. Jlice, a tvell-knmcn and much
esteemed lady of Deumsville, Cape May Co., A.J.
" My daughter lias suffered for a year past with a
scrofulous eruption, which was very troublesome.
Nothing afforded any relief until we tried your
SAKSAUARILLA, Whiefi soon completely cured her."
From Charles P. Cage, Esq., of the widely known
Gage, Murray if Co., manufacturers of enamelled
P'jpen in Xinhua, AT. 11.
" I had for several years a very troublesome
humor in my face, which grew constantly worse
until it disfigured aiy feature* and became an intol
erable affliction. 1 tried almost every tiling a man
could of both advice and medicine, but without any
relief whatever, until I took your SAUSAPAUILLA.
It immediately made my face worse, as you told me
it might for a time; but in a few weeks tiie new
skiu liegan to form under the blotches, and con
tinued until my face is as smooth as anybody's,
and 1 am without any symptoms of the disease that
I know of. I enjoy perfect health, and without a
doubt owe it to your SAUSAPAUILLA."
Erysipelas —General Debility—Purify the
Pi-om Dr. Koht. Sarin, Houston St., A'em York.
" DR. AYKK. I seldom fail to remove Eruption*
and Scrofulous Sores by tip; pcrseverioguseof your
SAP.-AI-AUtt.l.A, and I hare jnst now cured an attack
of Malignant Erysipelas with it. No alterative we
posses* equal* the SAKS AC A KILL A vou have sup- j
plied to the profession as well as to the people."
From J. E. Johnston, Esq., Wakeman, Ohio.
" For twelve years. I had the yellow Lrvsipelas
on my right arm, during which time I tried all the
celebrated physicians I could reach, and took hun
dreds of dollars worth of medicines. The ulcere
were so bad that the cords became visible, and the
doctors decided that my arm must be amputated. I
began taking your SAUSAPAUILLA. Took two bot
tles, and some of your PILLS. Together they have
curc-d me. lam now as well and sound as any body.
Being in a public place, my case is known to every
body iu this community, and excites the wonder of
From Hon. Henry Monro, .17. P. P., of Xcwcastle,
C. It'., a leading member of the Canadian Parlia
'• 1 have used your SAKSAPAKTLM in my family,
for general debility, and for purifying the blood,
with very beneficial results, and feel confidence in
commending it to the afflicted." r
St. Anthony's Fire, Rose, Salt Rheum,
Scald Head, Sore Eyes.
From Harris/ Sickter, Esq., the able editor of th*
Tunkhannock Democrat, Pennsylvania.
"Our only cbild, about three years of age, was
attacked I>\ pimples on his forehead. They rapidly
spread until tliey formed a loathsome and virulent
son-, which covered his face, and actually blinded
his eyes lor some days. A skilful physician applied
nitrite of silver anil otln-r remedies, without any
apparent effect. For fifteen days we guarded his
hands, lest with them he should tear open the fes
tcriug aud corrupt wound which covered his whole
face. Having tried every thing else we had any
hope frotn, we hegan giving your S.VRSAPAIMLLA,
and applviug the iodide of potash lotion, as you
direct. The sore began to beat when we had given
the first bottle, and was well when we had finished
the second. The child's eyelashes, which had come
out, grew again, and he Is now a* Healthy ami fair
as any otln-r. The whole neighborhood predicted
that ti'ie child mast die."
Syphilis acd Mercurial Disease.
From Dr. Iliram Stout, of St. Louis, Missouri.
" I find your SAR-AI-ARILI A a more effectual
r< medy for the sccoudsrf symptoms of Syphilis
nnd for syphilitic disease than any other we possess.
The proiessi.in are indebted to you for sotne of the
best medi'-jnes Ave have."
From A. J. French, M. D., an eminent physician of
Laurence, Mass., who is a prominent member of
the Legislature of Massachusetts,
"Dr. Ay LR. Sty dear Sir: I have found your
SARSAPARTLLA an excellent remedy for Syphilis,
both of the primary and secondary type, snu effec
tual in some eases that were too obstinate to yield
to other remedies. Ido not know what we can em
ploy with more certainty of success, where a power
ful alterative is required."
,1/r. Chas. S. Van Lietr, of one Kmnstrick, X'. J.,
had dreadful ulcers on his legs, cmise.l by the abuse
of mercury, or mercurial disease, which grew more
and more aggravated for years, in spite of every
remedy or treatment that could lie applied, until the
persevering use of AYLK'S SARH.APAUILL A relieved
Li in. Few cases can be found more inveterate and
distressing ttum this, and it took several dozen
bottles to cure him.
Leucorrhcea, Whites, Female Weakness,
are generally produced by internal Scrofulous IT
ce rid ion, and are very often cured by the alterative
effect of this RARSAPAHH.LA. Some cases require,
however, in aid of the SAITSAPAKILLA, the sklllul
application of local remedies.
From the rretll. norm and iridelycelebrated Dr.
Jacob Morrill, of Cincinnati.
" I have found your SAKSAPAWLLA an excellent
alterative in diseases of females. Many eases of
Irregularity, le-neorrliira, Internal Ulceration, and
local dcbilitv, arising from the scrofulous diathesis,
have yielded to it, aud there are lew that do not,
when its effect is properly aided by local treatment."
A lady, unicilliny to ulbnc the publication of her
name, writes.
" sfv daughter and myself have been cured or a
vcrv debilitating Leucorrhcea of lomj standing, by
tw.l bottles of your SARSAPARILLA."
Rheumatism, Gout, Diver Complaint, Dys
pepsia, Heart Disease, Neuralgia,
when caused bv Scrofula in the system, are rapidly
cured by this £xr. SAKSAPARIL.LA.
possess so many advantages over the other
purgatives in the market, and their superior
v irtues are so universally known, that we need
not ilo more than to assure the public their
quality is maintained equal to the best it ever
has been, and tliat tliey may be depended on
to do all that they have ever done.
Prepared by J. C. AY Ell, M. 11., &. Co.,
Lowell. Mass., and sold by
For sale byßuntjcll A Banaatyne, and Lyman &
White, Tunkhannock. Sterling A Son, Meshoppen,
Stevens <t Ackley, Laceyville, Frear, Dsan A Co , !
Factoryville, and all Druggists and Deuters in med- |
fines, everywhere.
xeetli Positively Extracted
This Substance is applied directly to the gums
producing a numbness (local Anaesthesia) of only the <
parts around the tooth, whereby it can be extracted
without any pin whatever, and without unpleasant
ness to the Patient: ,
j". j. sjzr.yror'R,
Surgeon Dentist,
Laceyville, Pa.—v7no-3m:
Howard AtfooflaGoti Report* for YOUNG
MEN on the CRIME OF SOLITUDE, and the ER
RORS, ABUSES a id DISEASES which destroy the
manly powers, and create impediments to MAR"
RI AGE, with sure means of relief. Sent in seated
letter, envelopes, free of charge. Address Df J.
SKILLEN HOUGHTON, Howard Association,
Philadelphia. Pa.
How straDge are ibe freaks *f memory !
The lessons of life we forget,
While a trifle, a trick of color,
In the wouuerfol web is set —
Set by some mordant of Fancy,
And despite the wear and tear
Of time or distance or trouble,
Insists on its right to be there.
A chance had brought us together ;
Our talk was of matters of course,
We were nothing, one to the other,
But a short half-hour's resource.
We spoke ef French acting and actors,
And their easy, natural way—
-01 the weather, for it wag raining,
As we drove home from the play.
We debated the social notbinga
Men take such pains to discuss ;
The thunderous rumors of battle
Were silent the while for us.
Arrived at her door, we left her
With a drippingly hurried adieu,
And our wheels went crunching the gravel
Of the oak-darkened avenue.
As we drove away through the shadow,
The candle she belJ in the door,
From rain-varnisbed tret-trunk to tree-trunk
Flashed fainter, and flashed no more-
Flashed fainter and wholly faded
Before we bad passed the wood ;
But the light of the f ice behind it
Went with me and stayed for good-
The vision of searce a moment,
And baldly marked at the time,
It comes unbidden to hxunt me,
Like a scrap of ballad rhyme,
Had she beauty 7 We'll not what they call so
You may find a thousand as fair,
And yet there's her face iu my memory,
With no special right to be there.
As I sit sometimes in the twilight,
And call back to life in the coals
Old faces and hopes and fancies
Long hurried long rest to their souls !
Ilcr face shines out of the embers ;
I see ber holding the light,
And bear the crunch of the gravel
And the mcep ol the rain that night.
'Tis a face that can never grow older,
That can never part with its gleam ;
'Tis a gracious possession forever,
For what is it all but a dream 1
Atlantic Monthly.
Promises are lightly spoken ;
Vows on which we blindly build
(Uttered only to be brokon)
Go forever unfulfilled.
Oft betrayed but still believing—
Duped again and yet again—
All our hoping, all our grieving
Warns ns, but it warns in vain.
From the cradle to the coral —
From the sunny days of youth—
We are taught the simple moral,
Still we doubt the moral's truth.
When a boy they found me rather
Loth to do as I was bid,
"I shall buy a birch," said father.
Broken vows ! He never did.
Grown extravigant when youthful,
In my tailor's debt I ran ;
He appeared abont as truthful
In his talk as any man.
Let me tell you how he sold me :
"Look you, Mr. What's-Your-Name,
I shall summon you," he told me—
But the summons never came.
Through the meadows, 'Visy-laden,
Once it was my lot to stray,
Talking to a lovely maiden
In a very spooney way ;
And I stole a kits—another—
Then another--then a lot,
"Fie !" she said, "I'll tell my mother,"
Idle words she told her not.
An auctioneer was selling a library
at auction. He was not verv well read in
books, bnt he scanned the title*, trusted to
luck and went ahead. " Here yon have."
be said, " Bunyan's * Pilgrim's Progress
how much'in I otfered for it ? How much
j do I hear for the 4 Pilgrim's Progress' by
John Banyan t 'Ti a first-rate book,
gentlemen, with six superior illustrations;
. how much do I hear? All about the Pil
-1 grims, by John Banyan ! Tetls where
they came from, an' where they larded,
an'what they done sifter they landed!—
Here's a picture of one of Vm goirC abbut
Plymouth pedl'n, with a pack on his back."
tfW Borne wag in England hit off the
salvage mania there a few years ago by
issuing a prospectus for a joint stock com
pany to drain the Red Sea, to recover the
I valuables the Egyptians lost, when Phara
oh and his host were overwhelmed by the
waters in their pursuit of the children of
Whatever tends to elevate nnd ennoble
: labor bem-fits man and whatever tends to
• degrade labor debases man. Labor is the
basis of all material prosperity, and the
1 wealth of a nation resides in its muscular
| arm. Labor is the producing agent of tbo
world. It goes forth to cultivate the earth
; and "makes the wilderness to bud and
;: blossom like the rose" Cities spring up
i | in its pathway to mark Us traokfi, .vessels
laden with choice articles of usefulness
'' refinement and luxury* plowing every* sea
j tell of its triumphs,
44 To Speak his Thoughts is Every Freeman's Right. "
In some parts of Germany, such is the
general dread of being buried alive, that a
system of precaution against this prema
ture act, is in vogue, by which more than
one person has been restored to life and
friends after being mourned as dead. The
plan is lot the corpse to be. placed in a
comfortable apartment, with face uncover
ed, and with a cord or wire attached to the
hands in such a manner that the slightest
movonrent will caue the tinkling of a lit
tle bell in an adjoining apartment, where
some one is always on the watch till there
are either signs ol life or decomposition,
to give the assurance of hopeless death.—
This custom has led to some striking scenes
and curious revelations; and one of the
most remarkable of these we arc now about
to put on record, as we received it, not
long since, from the narrator: —
44 1 had two bosom companions, and we
three were nearly always together when
our circumstances would permit. We
were not alike in scarcely any particular,
and for this reason, perhaps, we liked each
other all the better. We differed on near
ly every point in science, art, literature,
phi losophy, and religion, aud argued every
point we differed on.
4< On one thing, however, we did agree,
and that was the possibility of being buried
alive, and the unutterable horror which
must attend the subsequent consciousness
of the fact. So, in health, we solemnly
pledged ourselves that if within reach of
one another at the time of the supposed
decease of either, the living should faith
fully watch by the senseless form till the
return of life or the certainty of death.
41 My young fiiend, Adolph Ilofer, was
the first to go. lie was a believer in the
immortality of the soul, and tne identity of
the spirit with that occupying the mortal
tenement. Of course ive made our arrange
ments for watching the corpse according
to our compact, but without the slightest
hope of ever seeing another spark of life
in that loved form.
41 It was on the second night after the
death of Ilofer that Carl ai d I were sit
ting in an adjoining apartment, conversing
about the deceased and his religions belief.
We had attached a small cord to the fin
gers of the corpse, and connected it with
a little bell close to us, so that we could
be warned of any movement, without being
obliged to remain beside the body, which,
for various reasons, would not be agreeable
to us.
44 If his views in regard to a future state
are correct," observed Call, "there is no
certainty that he may not now be witb us,
even in this room.'"
44 Yes,'' returned I. 44 if they are correct,
which Ido not believe. When a man is
dead lie is dead, at least as far as this world
is concerned'"
44 It may fairly be presumed they are
based on facts when tliey cannot be reason
ably controverted. If man exists after
death as a roving spirit, gire me some ev
idence of it, and then ask me to believe.' 4
44 And what about ghosts?" 6aid Carl,
who was both skeptical and superstitious—
and he glanced furtively and timidly
arour.d the room as he spoke, as if he had
expected to encounter some fearful appa
44 Bah !" exclaimed I, contemptuously ;
44 you know my opinion of ghosts and hob
goblins—that they have no existence, ex
cept in the brains of timid fools."
44 At this moment we heard, or rather
fancied we heard, a strange noise in the
adjoining apartment.
44 Wht was that?" inquired Carl, in a
timid whisper.
44 Nothing," replied I, rousing myself
with a full determination to shake off what
I believed to be a foolish fancy. 41 Are
we men or children, to get frightened at
the noise of a rat ?"
44 Hush ! bark 1 I bear something still,"
whispered Carl, now fairly trembling wdtn
44 Then -if there is anything, we must
know what it is," said I, as 1 rose and took
up the light for the purpose of going to
look at the corpse. 44 Will you accompany
me, or shall I go alone ?"
44 Carl Heilsten slowly and steadily arose,
as one who felt called upon to perforin a
fearful duty ; but lie had scarcely got upon
his feet, when the little bell connected with
the dead was rung violently.
44 Mv nervous system never received such
a shock before or since, It seemed for a
moment as if I was paralized. Tbe light
dropped from piy hands and was extin
guished, and great beads of peispiration
stood all over mc. I'ut I remained inac
tive only for the time for one to count ten.
Reasoning that my friend had come to life
and needed my immediate assistance, I
hastily procured another light, and merely
glancing at Carl, who had fallen back on
his seat, white and helpless with sudden
fright, I rushed into tbe apartment of the
corpse, expecting to find Adolph living, if
not actually sitting tip or standing.
44 To my utter astonishment, however, I
found only the dead form of my friend—
cold, rigid, motionless ! There was such
an inflexible look on the features, that I
could not believe there was a single
spark of life in the body, and a close exam
ination of tbe lips and heart proved that
there was none iu reality. And yet tbe
hands had been moved, and were drawn to
one side, bnt rather as if jerked there by
tbe bell-cord, which was hanging some
what loose, than as if stirred by an inter
nal power.
44 But what had moved the hands and
rung the bell? This was the startling
mystery. Tbe room was not large, ton
taming no great amount of furnituie, and
was easily searched I had just passed
the light under the bed and around and
| behind every thing, when Carl appeared
at the door, pale, trembling, and covered
with cold, clammy perspiration.
44 Is he alive ?" he rather gasped than
44 No, oor has there been any life in bim
since his breath went out," I replied.
"Merciful God!" he ejaculated, ner
vously. grasping a chair for support, 4 what
rang tbe bell, then V
"That is the mystery lam tiying to
solve," said 1. 44 It is possible there may
be some person concealed here."
I opened a door of a deep closet a* I
spoke, in which hung the clothes of the
deceased, and went in and examined it
thoroughly. No other human being was
there, aud nothing had been disturbed.—
There was no other outlet to the room ex
cept the door communicating with the
apartment iu which we had been matching,
and tbe two windows looking out upon a
lawn, and the aasbes were closed and the
curtains drawn, showing no signs of recent
disturbance. I then re-examined the
room, and particularly the bed, but without
making any new discovery.
II This is all very strange!" said I half
musingly, and looking inquiringly at Carl
— 4 very strange, indeed!'
44 It roust have been something super
natural," he added, in a hollow whisper;
and moving over to the chest in the corner
he sank down upon it. As he did so, the
sharp click of the spring lock caused him
to spring up as if shot. For a moment or
two he stood trembling, and then he said
with more nerve —
" I believe I am a cowardly fool, to be
seared at every thing! Ido not fear any
thing human, though," be added ; but this
unearthly business unmans me."
44 1 now re-examined the corpse to be sure
there were no signs of life iu it, and found
not only death there, but the beginning
of decomposition. Perfectly sure of this,
we went into the other apartment and sat
down, to wait through tbe remaiuder of
the night and ponder the mystery. Scarce
ly were we seated before we fancied we
heard dull muffled sounds in the bedroom,
followed with something like a smothered
human groan. Carl's teeth now chattered
with terror, and I confess I never felt less
courageous in my life. These straDge
noises continued only for a short time and
gradually died away into silence, after
which we were disturbed no more,
44 In course of time our friend was bur
ied, and sometime after the funeral we
proceeded to open his strong box, or chest,
according to Lis direction. Then it was
that our supernatural mystery bad a natu
ral but most terrible explanation.
44 In that chest was the Mack and decay
ing corpse of one whom we all knew in
4 * The following is our conjecture;
44 Cognizant of Adolph liofer's money
and jewels, of their place of deposit, and
of our mode of watching the dead, he had
on that eventful night, anteied the dead
room through a window at an early hour,
and concealed himself in the closet till
midnight, and then set about his work of
robbery. Some accidental noise having
alarmed us, as lie could tell from our con
versation, he had. either in Lis haste to
secrete himself, or intentionally to frighten
us still more, rung the bell in the manner
stated, and then got into the chest, which
had a powerful lock spring. My friend
Carl, by accidentally hitting down on this,
had sealed his doom ; and his subsequent
groans and terrible efforts to burst from
his narrow prison were the noises
which had so disturbed us the second time.
The man's death was a fearful retribution,
and the discovery of his dead body spoiled
an otherwise wonderful ghost story."
TEX FOLLIES. —To think that the more
a man eats the fatter aud stronger he will
To believe that the more hours children
study at school the faster they learn
To conclude that if exercise is good for the
.health the more violent and exhausting it
is the more good is done
To imagine that every hour taken from
sleep is an hour gained
To act on the presumption that the smal
lest room in the house is large enough to
sleep iu
To atgue that whatever remedy causes
one to feel immediately better is good for
the system without regard to more ulterior
To commit an act which is felt in itself
to be prejudicial, hopirog that somehciv or
other it may be done in your case with
To advise another to take a romedy
which yon have not tried yourself, without
making special inquiry whether all the
conditions are alike
To eat without an appetite, continue to
eat after it has been satisfied merely to
gratify the taste
To eat a hearty supper for the pleasure
experienced during the brief time it is
passing down the throat at the expense
of a whole night of distnrbed sleep and a
weary waking in the mornrng.
The Boston Journ 11 records the i
following remarkable incidentAt Alason j
village, N. 11., a few days since, while some !
children were at play, an immense golden
eagle swooped down and attacked one of '
the children with the evident intention '
to carry it off A woman ran from the bouse j
with a broom, when the eagle let go the ;
child and attacked her wth ferocity. At
this moment a man gunning in the vicinity
came to the rescue and shot the eagle,
breaking a wing and capturing hha. He
is the largest bird seen within the memory
of tbe oldest inhabitant. The biid was
Sorchased by Mr. George Dunford of
Tew Orleans who was visiting at tbe
rillnge, and will be takeo to thai city.
No person who passes only eight hours
in bed can be said to 44 waste his time in
sleep." According to Gorget, a woman
should sleep a couple of hours ionger than
a man. For the latter he allows six or
seven hours, for the former, eight or nine.
It is certain that strength or energy of
brain will, when aided by custom, modify
the faculty of controlling the disposition to
slumber. Frederick tbe Great and Hunt
er, tbe great surgeon, slept only five hours
in the tweuty-fonr, while Napoleon seem
ed to exert a despotic power oversleep and
waking, even amid the roar of artillery.
An engineer has been known to fall asleep
w.tbin a boiler while his fellows were beat
ing on the outside with their ponderous
hammers ; and the repose of a miller is not
incommoded by the noise of his mill.—
Sound ceases to be a stimulus to sucb men,
and what would have proved an inexpress
ible annoyan- e to others, is to them alto
gether unheeded. It is common for carri
ers to sleep on horseback, and coachmen
jon their coaches. During the battle of the
Nile some boys were so exhausted that
they fell asleep on tbe deck, amid the deaf
ening thunder of that terrible engagement, j
The faculty of remaining asleep for a
great length of time is possessed by some
individuals. Such was the case with Quin,
the celebrated player, who could slumber
for twenty-four hours suco ssively ; with
E izabeth Orvin, who spent three-fourths
of her time in sleep; with Elizabeth Per
kins, who slept a week or a fortnight at a
time; with Alary Lyall, who did the same
for successive weeks, and witb many oth
ers more or less remarkable. In Bowyer's
44 Life of Beattic," a curious anecdote is
related of Dr Reid, viz* That he could
take as much food and immediately as
much sleep as were sufficient for two days;
The celebrated General Elliott never slept
more than four hours out of the twenty
four. In all other respects he was strik
ingly abstinent; his food consisting wholly
of bread, water, and vegetables. In a let
ter communicated to Sir John Sinclair, by
John Gordon of Swiny, Caithness, men
tion is made of a person named James
Mackay, of Sherry,who died in the Strath
naver, in the year 1797. aged ninety-one;
he >nly slept four hours on an average out
of the twenty-four, and was a remarkably
robust and healthy man. The celebrated
French General Pichegrue informed Sir
Richard Blane that during his whole year's
campaigu he had not above an hour's sleep
in the twenty-four; Macisb knew a lady
who never slept above an hour at a time,
and the whole period of whose sleep did
not exceed over three or four hours in tbe
twenty-four j and yet she enjoyed excellent
As an original expression of heavy
grief we doubt if anything owe touching
lias been read than the following, of a
crushed heart in Star City, Nevada. Mrs.
£ , of that place, an eccentric old
lady, recently rushed into the room of a
relative, and without waiting for the osual
salutations, said :
44 Well, John's dead, [her husband.]
" Dead ! Is it possible ? '
"Yes; dead! died last night! Want
you all to come to the funeral. Tbe Ma
sons and Odd Fellows are going to turn
out, and we shall have a beautiful time.
Deaths being of rare occurrence in that
settlement of course every body went to
the funeral. Next day somebody remark
ed to the old lady that there was a large
turn out.
44 Yes, indeed there was," she replied ;
44 but I didn't enjoy myself as well as 1 have
at some funerals, the hosses cut up so /"
SHAIYS AND STRAWS —An incident is
mentioned by a correspondent, who was
desired by his mother to go to neighbor
Shaw's and see if he had any straw suita
ble for filling beds. 44 Air. Shaw," says our
informant, 44 was blessed with a goodly
number cf Alisses Shaw, and I therefore
felt a little timid at encountering them,
and to make the matter worse, 1 arrived
just as the family were seated to dinner,—
Stepping in the doorway, hat in hand, I
stammered out, 44 Air. Straw, can you spare
enough Shaw to fill a couple of beds 7"—
" Well," replied the old gentlemen, glanc
ing around at his large family, and enjoy
ing my mistake, 44 1 don't know out I can ;
how many will you need ?" Before I could
recover, those hateful Shaw girls burst into
a chorus of laughter, and I made a hasty
wise parent labors hard and lives spar
ingly'all his life, for the purpose of leaving
enough to give his children a starting in
the world, as it is called. Setting a young
man afloat with money left him by relatives
is like tying bladders under the arms of
one who cannot swim; ten chances to one
he will lose his bladders aud go to the
bottom. Teach him to swim and he will nev
er need the bladders. Give your child a
sound education, and you have done enough
for bim. See to it that his morals are
pure, bis mind cultivated, and his whole na
ture made subservient t<> the laws which
govern men, and you have given what will
be of more value to him than the wealth cf
the Indies.
To be thrown upon one's resources 16 to
be east into the very lap of fortune, for
our faculties then undergo a development,
and display an energy, of which they were
previously unsusceptible.— Dr. Arnold.
(Eg l " A lawyer being on the point of
death, made his will, leaving all his estate
for the benefit of fools and mad men, on
the ground that he got it all out of them,
and ought to restore it to its rightful
TERMS, $2.00 Per. AOTTUM, in Advene*.
NO. 18.
Pis* aitii gtfrertaw.
, jr~~ ; "r-n '
Why it iron sometimes (ike • bead el rob*
bera ? Because it ia united to ateel.
Doesn't* waterfall meke e "crik" ia the
neck 7
It ia a mistake to aoppoae the sun ia sofr
ported in the sky bv its beams.
Which is the oldest tree in the world 7
The eld*r tree, of course.
A dangerous character—A ■"" who "takes
life" cheerfully^
Why was the whale that swallowed ionah
like a retired milkman 7 Because be got a
profit [prophet] out of the water;
An Irishman once observed that mile
stones were kind enough to answer your
questions without giving you the trouble to
ask them.
When Haddock's wife kicked him cut of
bed, said he, ''Look here now ! you had bet
ter not do that again ; if you do it will caoae
a coldness in the family."
The first day a little boy went to school
the teacher asked him if he could •M—
"Yea, air," "Well how do you apell boy 7"—
"Ob, just as other folks do."
U .:!
"As diamond polishes diamond," aaya a
German writer, ''to man ia formed by man,"
Truly. And we m>y add, as diamond rata
diamond, so man it fleeced by man,
A printer never leaves any money at home
for fear of fire, and never carries any frith
him for fear of robberS, nor deposits in any
bank fur fear of speculative baok officers.
To Isceftsin the number of children in a
street—best a big drum. To ascertain the
number of loafers—start a dog figbt.
"My son, take those eggs to town, and if
you can't get a dime a doaen for them, bring
them back." <Jetntby went •• directed, and
came back again, saying : "Mother, let me
alone for a trade ; they all tried to (M 'em
for fifteen cents, but I screwed np to a dime."
In §o advertisement for a young gentleman
who left bis parents, it is stated thit "If
master Jack? will please return'to hta discon
solate parents be shall not he sent to school,
and he shall be allowed to sweetea his ofrn
"Doctor," said Lov#-a little, "do you think
a very little spirits now and thea would hurt
me very much ?"
"Why, no, sir," answered the doctor, very
deliberately. "I do not think a little now
and thrt would hurt you yery much \ but,sir
if you don't take Snj, ft wou't bUri you at
A schoolboy be'mg asked to define the
word ''admission," said it meant t#etky-fivo
cents. "Twenty-five cents!" echoed the
master." "What sort of definition do yon
call that ?" "1 don't know." solkily replied
the boy, "but I'm sure ft says so in the ad
vertisement down there rft the show." "Yes,
said another boy, "and children half price."
Mrs. Partington says: "For. my parti
can't deceive what on aitth efld'ttltion ia
coming to. When I was young, if a gal only
understood the rules of distraction, provision,
multiplying, replenishing, and common de
nominator, and knew alt about rivers and
their obituaries, the oovenants and their dor
mitories, the provinces and umpire, tbey had
eddication enough. But now tbey have to
stbddy bottomy, algcrbay, and bava to de
monstrate suppositions about the sycophants
of parrallelagrams, to sty bbtfaisgof ox hides,
assbeads, cowsticks, and obtuse mangles.''—
Ilere the old lady was so coofused with te
chsuica! names that she broke down.
"Oh the Snow, the Beautiful Snow."
This beautiful piece of poetry has been
parodied in the following lines which we ex
tract from a Louisville paper. As whole
families will be able to appreciate it we give
it for their edification.
Oh, the flies ! ffie beautiful iies !
Ornamenting our apple pies ;
In the cupboard and oft tbe abet,
In the house and en the street ;
Around the sugar bowl they swarm,
Beautiful flies can do no barm 1
(Courier.) Y, D.
! Oh, tbe fleas f the rascilly fleas I
That bite a fellow whenever they please,
Ob arm, or leg, or side, bt beck,
And catch 'em you can't whatever your
For when you think you've Surely got
They arc "gone from your gaze" and fin
gers "dot rot 'em. B. D.
I _.
j A sharp talking lady was reproved by her
husband, who requested her to keep her
! tongue in her mouth. "My dear," responded
I the wife, "it is against tho law to carry eon*
! ceded weapons."
i JESTSubscribe lor