Wyoming democrat. (Tunkhannock, Wyoming Co., Pa.) 1867-1940, October 16, 1867, Image 1
ttpmiitg Democrat. HARVEY SICKLER. Publisher. VOL. VII. Iteming fie mortal, A Dtmocretii weekly _ p*p*r devoted to Poll Vet N*w, the Arts Jk PJPfc'Q.yfl't e4 Sciences Ac. Pub- " Kak/T j luhed every Wednes- -. i <•7. at Tunkhaouoek *lS[?**#' Wyoming County,Pa 'v T' .\ 'fSS t fjP * HARVEY SICKLER. <!s*3s~ Terms—l copy 1 year, (in advance) 82,00; if Set paid witbie six months, fc'2.so will be charged NO paper will be DISCONTINUED, UDtil all ar reeragasre paid; unless at the opium of puMiaher. RATES OF ADVERTISING. TE! LINES CONSTITI'TK A SQITARE. One square one or three insertions 81 50 , Bvery subarqu- lit insertion lets than 8 50 RSALESTATE, PERSONAL PROPKRTV, and GENERAL ! AnrKßTist.NO, as ma be agreed up.m, FATENT MEDICINES and other advertisements oy ; the column : One column, 1 year, S6O Half column, 1 year * 35 Third column, 1 year, 25 t fourth column, 1 year, 20 Husiness Cards of one square or less, per year, , erufa paper, 88 rr EDITORIAL or LOCAL ITEM advertising—with out Advertise!" ent —15 cts. per line. Liberal terms i made with permanent advertisers EXECUTORS, ADMINISTRATES and Al'DI-j TOR'S NOTICES, of thekeu.il length, 82,50 I OBITUARrES.r SKceedißs too On s. each ; REI.I I GIOUS and LITERARY NOTICES, not of general ] nterest, one hulf tne regular rates. i rr Advertisesaewu muat he handed in bv TCES DAT NOON, to iusure insertion the same week. JOB WORK f all kinds neatly executed, and at price* to suit the times. All TRANSIENT ADVERTISEMENTS and JOE WORK must be paid for, when ordered Business Notices. Rit.JkW K 1.l r ll,hi ATTORNEYS AI i LAW o®go ou Tioga Street Tunah.inuiM'k t'u | UTM Tw. PIATT, ATTORNEY AT LAW <f j ficc in Stark's Brick Block Tioga St., Tunk j • ansnelcfa ■ Lf *,CpOPKR. PHY.-HOIAN A SlstEO> ! IL# Nwrton Centre. Luzerne Count v Pa. L, HARRISII. ATTORNEY AT LAW 0 Ofh-e at the Court House, in Tunktiauuock ' Cp. J> JW. RBOAD*. FUMieuV A JO. I dEu.V 1 • will attend" ph>m,d!y ti/ali > '• hfe pr.,- j fesaion. Maybe fou ul at hi< 02L# at the Drug j JStore. or at bis resides.* ou Pihu.au Srqet, tofuierly { eccuptSi By" A. K. I'eckhuan Esq. < ' DENTISTRY. A : : DR. L T. BURNS baa peiynanentlv loeate# in i Tunkhanno.S Borough, and re-re.Gully tender* til professional services to its citizens Office on second floor, formerly occupied ty Dr. ' Wilmao. v6n3otf. PORTRAIT, LANDSCAPE, AVU OEN&meutae rATrvTirvG By If. HUGJ-JK, Artist. Rooms over the Wyoming National bank,in Stark's Brick Block, TLNKHA.NNOCK, I'A. Life-size Portraits painted from Amb'otype? or | Photographs Photographs Painted in Oil fV lore — i All orders for paintings executed according to or dr or 00charge made. Instructions given in Drawine Sketching, ' Portrait and Landscape Painting, in Oil or water Colors, and in all branches of the art. Tunk, July 31, 'o' -vgnso-tf. NEW TAILORING SHOP The Subscriber having had a sixieea years prac ! tical experience in cutting and making clothing j aow offers his services in tnis line to the citizens of I BICBOLSON And vicinity. Those wishing to get Fits will find bis shop the place to get them. JOEL, R. SMITH •nSO-6mni "BOLTON HOUSE. HARHISRURG, I'KNNA. The undersigned having lately par. hased the " BUEHLER HOUSE " property, hag already com menced such alterations and Improvements as will render this old and popular House equal, if not supe rior, to any Hotel in the City of Harrishurg. A continuance of the public patronage is refpect fully solicited. GEO. J. BOI.TON- j "WALL'S HOTEL, LATE AMERICAN HOUSE, TU NKHAN NOCK, WYOMING CO., PA THIS establishment hn* recently been refitted an * lurnished in the latest style Everv attention •ill he given to the comfort and convenience ol those patronise the IIoue T li WALL, Owner an I Proprietor . Tookhannock, September 11. 1861 MEANS' HOTEL. OWANDA, PA . P- B. BAKTi.ET, ILateolt,. P **I*ABN HOCSK, ELHIRA, N Y PROPRIETOR. Au?^ rEL - ' * of tM LARGEST ■ AR RANbED Houses io the country-It s fitted up m the most ino<Wn and improved style, and no pains are spared to miUo lt a p | cue4lJt and agreeable stopping-place for all v 3, n2l, ly NORTH BRANCH HOTEL, MESHOPPEN, WYOMING COI NTY, PA Wm. U. (t)RTRI(lIIT, Prop'r [TAVING resumed the proprietorship of the above L-a. Hotel, the undersigned will spare no efforts tender the house no agreeable place ol sojourn to *ll who may favor it with their custom. Mi KM Slftotal. THE peculiar taint or infection which we p*w ca *' lurks yf in the constitutions of rZZ. 8 multitudes of men. It J cither produces or it produced by an en xrtTlJ^ vitiated elate Tj^° f tIK " H '' 1 SfMr v ' forces in their vigorous action, aud " fall into disorder and decay. The scrofulous contamination is va riously caused by mercurial disease, low living, disordered digestion from unhealthy food, impure air, filth and filthy habits, the depressing vices, and. ahove all, hy the venereal infection. Whatever "be its origin, it is hereditary in the constitution, descending " from parents to children unto the third and fourth generation; " indeed, il seems to be the rod of Him w ho says, "I will visit the iniquities of the fathers upon their children." The diseases it originates take various names, according to tiie organs it attacks. In the lungs. Scrofula produces tubercles, and finally Consumption; in the glands, swellings which suppurate and be come ulcerous sores; in the stomach and bowels, derangements which produce indi gestion. dyspepsia, and liver complaints; on the skin, eruptive and cutaneous affections. These, all having the ssttne origin, require the same remedy, viz., purification and invigora tion of the blood. Purify the blood, and these dangerous distempers leave you. With feeble, foul, or corrupted blood, you cannot have health; with that "life of the llesh" healthy, you cannot have scrofulous disease. Ayer's Saraaparilla is compounded front the most effectual anti dotes that medical science has discovered for this afflicting distemper, anil for the cure of the disorders it entails. That it is far supe rior to any other remedy yet devised, ia known by all who have given it a trial. That it does combine virtues truly extraordinary in their effect upon this class of complaints, is indisputably proven by the great multitude j of publicly known and remarkable cures it has made of the following diseases: King's Evil, or Glandular Swellings, Tumors, Eruptions, Pimples, Blotches and Sores, , Erysipelas, Rose or St Anthony's Fire, Salt Rheum, Scald Head, Coughs from tuberculous depodt3 in the lung 3, White Swellings, Debility, Dropsy, Neuralgia, Dyspepsia or Indigestion, Syphilis and Syphilitic Infections, Mercurial Diseases, Female Weaknesses, and. indeed, the whole i series of complaints that ari?e from impurity of the blood. Minute reports of individual eases may lie found in A\ tit's AMLKH AK ALMAXAC, W liich is furnished to the drugyistt for gratuitous distribution, wherein may tie learned the directions for its use, and some of tire remarkable cures which it has made when ail other remedies had failed to afford relief. Those eases are purposely taken from all section* of the country, in order that every reader may have access to some one who can speak to hint of its benefits from personal experience. Scrofula depresses the vital energies, and thus leaves its victims far more subject fodista-e and its fatal results than are healthy constitutions. Hence it tends to shorten, and docs greatly shorten, the average duration of human life. The vast importance of these considerations has led us to spend years in perfecting a remedy which is adequate to its cure. This we now offer to the public under the name of ATKH'S SAKSUMUILLA, although it is composed of ingredients, some of w hicli exceed the best of Si tusapartlla in alterative power. By its aid you may protect yourself from the suffer ing and danger of these disorders. Purge out the foul corruptions that rot and fester in the blood, purge out the causes of disease, and vigorous health will follow. By its pecu liar virtues this remedy stimulates the vital functions, and thus expels the distempers which lurk within the system or hurst out on any part of it AVe know the public have been deceived by many compounds of Sttrsoparilla , that promised much and did nothing; hut they will neither be deceived nor disappointed in this. Its virtues have been proven Ly abun dant trial, and there remains 110 question of its surpassing excellence for the cure of the afflicting diseases it is intended to reach. Although under the same name, it is a very different medicine from any other which has been before the people, ami is far more ef fectual than any other which has ever been available to them. AYER'B CHERRY PECTORAL, Tho World's Great Remedy for Coughs, Colds, Incipient Con sumption, and for the relief of Consumptive patients in advanced stages of the disease. This has been so long used and so uni versally known, tliat we need do no mora than assure the public that its quality is kept up to the best it ever has been, and that it may be relied on to do all it has ever done. Prepared by Da. J. C. AVER & Co., Practical and Analytical C/iemisU, Lowell, Mass. Sold by all druggists every where. For side ny I!, nneil A U oin ityne, ari l Lvraan & Wells, Tunkhnnnock, fling A .Son, Mc.boppen, Stevens A Ackley. LareyviEe, Freer Dean A Co., Fft.-t'>ryville. mnt all Druggists uuj Dealers in med icines. everywhere. £ IEV MILIIMY (fUnM MRS. BAKDWELL is now receiving a splendid stock of SPKIXH A SUMMER Hoods of. il the new est SHAVES ..f FELT and VELVET HAT£ for LADIES aid CHIL DREN. Al-. BONNETS, VELVET RIBBONS FLOWERS, and and a full assortment of l FANCY GOODS. I at prices to ilefy competition #ll the latest styles of paper patterns, j SLEEVES, CLOAKS, JACKETS. &c., drc., from MADAME DEMOHES7. J y Drama made, cut and basted at the shortest notice. 1 M*3. BARDWBLL. I Tuaktitanoefc, May. 23, 13g".—vfctl N. TIINKIIANNOCK. WYOMING CO., PA.-WEDNESDAY, OCT, 16. 1867. lortni. PADDLE YOUR OWN CANOE. sr MRS. SARAH T SOLTOK. Voyager upon Life's sea, To yourself ho truo, And wbore'er your lot may bo, Paddle your own cinoo, Never, though the winls miy rave, Falter nor l*>ok back, But upon the darkest wave Leave a shining track, t Nobly dare the wildest storm, Stem the hardest gale. Brave of heart and strong of arm Yon wi;l never tall. When the world hi* old and daik. Keep an aim in view, And toward the beacon mark Paddle yutarown canoe, Every wave that bears you on To the silent shore, From its sunny source has gone To return no more. Then let not an hour's delay, Cheat you of your due, But, while it i.- called to- day, Paddle your own canoe, If your birth denied you wealth, # Lofty state and power, Honest fame and hardy health. Are a bett*-r dower; But if these will not suffice, Golden gain pursue, And to win the glittering prize, Paddle your own canoe- 9 "Would you wrest the wreath of Fame From the hand of Fate : Would you write a deathless name, With the good and great ; Would you bless yt ur fellow men, Heart and soul imbue With the iioiy task, and then Paddle your own canoe Would you crush the tyrant Wrong, In tne world's five fight, With a sp ; rit brave and strong, Battle for the Right ; And to break the chain that bind The many 10 the few— To enfranchise slavish mind, Paddle your owu canoe. Nothing great is lightly uon, Nothing won is lost— Every good deed, nobly done, Will repay the cost, Leave to Heaven in humble trust, All y iu will to do ; But, if you succeed, you must Paddie your own canoe. BOH ANTIC INCIDENT. A romantic little incident has just come to my knowledge. The facts as given to tne are as follows. Two years ago Hugh Crawford Folock, H young gentleman then about twenty years old, suddenly disap peared from his home in -Scotland, much to the dismay of his relatives aid acquain tances. It subsequently became known that he had come to this country with five hundred pounds in his pocket. He sported about New York and other cities until his funds commenced to run short, when, in a fit of desperation,be enlisted in the Fifth United States cavalry as a private soldier, and in this humble capacity struggled against hardships and deprivations to which he had wholly unused. In the meantime his father died some four months ago, leaving Hugh heir to a baron etcy and a snug little income of live thou sand pounds per annum,t>r about $2£.000 in gold. The young baronet was duly sought for, and, after an expenditure of in advertising, it was ascertained that he was stationed at Camp Verde, Tex as, discharging the duties of a farrier.— Colonel William S, Htllver, of New York, who became interested in the case, induced Sir Frederick Bruce to procure the dis charge of Pollock, which was promptly acceded to by General Grant. The young Sir Hugh Crawford Pollock, has, therefore, been telegraphed for, and has given up the occupation of siioer and curer of hors es, to enter upon a Scotch baronetcy and five thousand pounds a year. Such is life. —Correspondence AC Y. Herald. PLAIN SAXON SPEECH UNDERSTOOD.— A good story is told of a certain Colonel, in the late war. The Colonel aforesaid was riding in a stage coach, with saveral oilier passengers, when he accidentally dropped his hat outside of the coach. Put ting his head out of the window, he ex claimed in a sentorian voice, "Charioteer, pause I have lost my chapean." The dri ver paid no heed to the demand. Again the bombastic fellow aulhoritively spoke— "Charioteer, pause ! I have lost my, chn— peau." No attention being paid by the driver to this last command, a plain, blunt man. who had become disgusted with his fellow traveler's silliness and pomposity put his head out of the window, and said, "Driver, hold on ! this D d fnol has last his hat." This wag perf.-ctly intelligi ble *o the driver, expletive and all, and the hat was secured. The ripest fruit first falls, — Shaks jxm t*. " To Speak his Thoughts is Every Freeman's Bight. " THE HORRID LITTLE FRIGHT. "So you have told your father you will not marry vour cousin Cota ? Yes. 1 have made up my mind that I would rather lose my grandfather's money than marry that horrid little frig it.' The first speaker was a tine-looking young man of some thre-and twenty years. 11 is companion, Kliiott Grantley, was about the same age, tall and extremely hand*ome, with rich, clustering, chestnut curls, large black eyes, full of fire and in telligence, fine features, and a very beauti ful mouth filled with white, even teeth, and shaded by a dark moustache. His figure was moulded in the perfection of a manly symmetry. "You never saw her, Arnold," said he, leaning over the table, and speaking ear nestly ; "you never saw her, but I went down some eight or ninv years ago to pay a visit to mv intended wife. Fancy to yourself a thin child ten years old, yellow as an otange, witL pinched fea tures, and a close, white cap put on to con ceal the loss of her hair, which was shaved off after an illness. When I was intro duced to her she dropped a little awkward courtesy, and put her finger in her tnoufh, and after staring at rue in silence for a few minutes she began to giggle, and finally ran away." A fascinating picture, truly." "Cousin Corn is coining to pay a visit to Lucy Maxwell next we-k, and I aup oose I must do the agreeable, but I will never marry that horrid little tright.— Come, Arnold, suppose we go down lo see Charlotte Cusbman as Lady Macbeth." "Agreed" And the two strolled away. Thcv had bardiv gone when the win dow curtains were drawn aside, ani a tiny, fairy-like girl stepped in from the balco ny. She was young, aboit fifteen, with bright, goldrn hair and biue eyes. "Now ain't it a shame or Elliott to talk so about Cousin Cora ?" -oliloquized the intruder. 1 didn't mean to listen, hut I couldn't come in before Arnold in this dress," and she glanced at the pretty chintz wrapper. "Wouldn't it b? fun if ho fell in love with Cousin Cora, after all ? I wonder if is so ugly ? She writes beautiful letters to me, but I have never seen her. I mean to writ-; to her what Elliott says, so she wont fal in love with him. 11 e's so handsome I din 1 believe she can help it if she don't know," and the fairy tripped away. Two young ladies, some lays later,were standing in a brilliantly lighted parlor be fore a pier glass. Everything indicated that there were visitors expected. The room was beautifully decorated, and the ladies were in full dress. One of them, Miss Lucy Maxwell, had a very sweet face and a pleasant, winning smile. She was dressed in white. The other was tall and stately, with beautiful features, clear, white complexion, with a rich, warm color, and large black e\es. Her hair, which was wieathed like a coronet round her small, classically shaped head, was as biaek as a ravens wing, and the diamonds among its braids added to her regal appearance.— Her dress was of garnet-colored silk, flounced with black lace, and her beauti ful white arms and shoulders gleamed out in a strong contrast against the dark dress. "Do I look well, Lucy?" "Yon never looked more beautiful. I thtnk diamonds suit you exactly. Your necklace and bracelets are divine. But what can detain Elliott? lie promised to come early to meet his Cousia Cora be fore the others arrived." "Poor fellow ? How disappointed he will br." "Yes, Miss Stanley," said Lucy, laugh ing. There is a ring. Ah, here he is." "I am very sorry that Cora was unable to pay me her promised visit," said Miss Maxwell, meeting her guest; "but I have another guest. Dora, allow ni" to intro duce Mr. Grantly, our dear friend Cora Grantlev's cousin and hetrothel. F-lliott's low bow and glance of intense admiration did not look much like disap pointment. Other guests arrived. Miss Stanley, with her magnificent beauty and queenly bearing, was the belle of the evening, and none were more devoted than Elliott Grantley. Did site dance, lie was her partner more than half the time. Was she fatigued, he handed her a chair and fanned her. Day after day passed, and Elliott was constantly at Mr. Maxwells. Miss Stan lev while she was deluged with attention from every quarter, showed him especial favor She rode with him, sang with him, dai ced with him, wore the flowers he pre sented, and learned the music he selected. "Well, dear," said Lucy, coming one day to her room, "I think you have made a Complete conquest of Elliott, lie raves about you and last evening he confined to me his intention of honoring you by an of fer of his hand and heart." "Won!" cried Miss Stanley, rising and stepping to the glass "Won ! 1 will re fuse hun !" "But I thought you confessed to me a certain liking for the gentleman," "1 will not have him. He refused me, and I will repay the obligation. No, Lu cy, I resolved it I could win his it>vc no pains should be spared. Now 1 feel hu miliaied to think that I have ever s.ooped to gain it. I do love him ; but nevertheless I will refuse him." "And how w ill vou bear it ?" "Perhaps lie will turn to his cousin Cora for consolation ; if not. I can easily bring him to my feet again." The next day Mr, Grantley, to bia pro found astonishment, waa refused by Miss Stanley* He could not understand it.— Full of indignation at wbat he termed co quetry, he determined to visit his consiu Cora, and, if he found her improved mar ry her to show that he did not care for his rejection. Full of this idea, he started for his uncle's A long jonrney somewhat cooled his disappoinimcnt, and he bad re solved to pay a flying visit to his relative and then return once more to attack Miss Stanley's heart long before he reached his uncle's house. "Cora, my dear, your cousin Elliott is in the parlor." "1 knew he would come," said the per son addressed, as *he shook out the folds of her rich dark silk dress, and then went to the parlor The room was dark, for it was late in the afternoon, and yet too ear ly for candles." "Good afternoon, Cousin." Elliott could hardly believe bis ears Truly he he had somewhere beard that voice before. "We have expected you for some weeks," continui'd the mtsterious voice,— "It is very dull here in this season, and I quite longed for your promised visit.— However 1 was very happy to hear from Lucy that your time was more agreeably employed, How is Miss Stanley?" "I think —that is—l was " "Alt, I am delighted to hear that she is so well. Of course you are engaged by this time ? It was not treating me fairly, but I forgive you. Do you know I have some thoughts of marrying our dancing master, Mons. La l'irouette ?" "Do you ? Thank you." At that moment lights were brought in. Cora was standing with her face concealed by a window curtain, but as the servant left the room she dropped the screen. In an instant Elliott was by her side. "Dora 1" "Alter the first letter." "Dora—Cora—, I mean—oh, I ' "Stop! stop, Mr. Grantley; surely, you would not marry such a horrid little fright ?"' "Forgive mc!' "W ell, reader, we will retire. There was a wddding a few months later, and Elliott married that "Horrid Little Fright!" SPEAK DISTINCTLY. No nation excels our own in the talking, faculty, not even the voluble Frenchman, and among no other people can so many persons be found who think themselves qualified, and who reallv possess some, to "speak in meeting," We have a largt r number than any other people of those who can speak iu public intelligently.— But the great deficiency with the majority of them is that they do not speak intelli gibly*. They do Uut articulate distinctly or make themselves heard as they should, nor as they intend. How often is the lis tener annoyed by the habit which minis ters, lawyers, and stump orators have, of either suddenly dropping the voice near or at the close of a sentence, so that the final utterance becomes quite impossible of apptehension. You want to hear what the man is going to say, but vou fail, be cause he don t say it—at least for your ear. It is one of the most provoking things in the world—and [rives one much the same sensation, as it would to lose a choice morsel, the best of the feast, by having it slip away from your lips just as your mouth was all made up for it. Pub lic speakers should correct this vicious trick of suddenly reducing their intuiligi ble utterances to inarticulate sounds.— Some evidently resort to the practice with the idea ol giving added force, solemnity or emphasis to what they say, hut they overdo it so completely as to destroy the effect of all that has ptcceeded the attempt to give an effective finish. Another hahit, even worse, is that of | mumbling instead of artieulrting, slurring over words,giving the v.nvds only half; their requisite volume and time and end ing in a confused rumble of consonant sounds. This is peculiarly a fault ot Eng lish orators. Not a dozen of the talking members of Parliament speak with such distinctness as to be lieai<l by a poison at a distance of fifty feet. Speaking of this j the Pail Mai. (iazette says: "The O'dir.a- ! ry English orator cannot be understood | simply because he mumbles instead of ar- ( ticulating his syllables distinctly. Having j got a language oveiflowing with consonants I he intensifies the evil by cultivating a | habit of not opening or closing his hps j with that decision and completeness with-) out which no language whatever can be properly spoken. Our American public speakers are amenable to the sapie ciiti cism. It is a fault that might be easily corrected, and for the comfort of the hear ers, and the effectiveness of the speech it should be. It is the same thing that makes the majority of men such poor readei6of their owr. language. The first, second and final exhortation, which wc would give to children learning to read aloud, would be—''articulate, articulate distinctly." This is not as some suppose incompatible with rapidity of speech Some of the most rapid of public speak ers arc thoe whose speech is most distinct ly audible and most easily understood. — We have beard Kufas Choate utter as ma ny words per minute as moat orators would be able to speak in three minutes, aDd continue this rapid speech for hours, yet not a word or syllable would be lost. Every one was completely articulated and reached the ear without difficulty. Notb ' ing would lead mote directly and positive | ly to improve the character of American ' public speaking, than for orators to be | constantly mindful of the rule—speak S plainly, articulate fully and distinctly.— i Jerwj City Journal, * ADVERTISEMENT EXTRAORDI NARY. "Mrs. Government," the lovely, amiable and refined relict of the "late lamented" is out in a series of letters, bemoaning the insufficiency of her income from what re ntaius of the accumulations of the Presi dential office to support her. She scolds hke a termagant,be rating the Black R pub lican party in general, and some of her of- j fiee beneficiaries in particular, for ingrati tude and want of respect for her deceased husband. She says the revenue from what remains of Mr. Lincoln's estate is j but about $1,700, which is altogether iu- ; adequate to support her and her family,! wjiich consists of herself and two bovs, one ' of whom is 21 years old, and the" other well along in his teens. One would sup- ' pose that, the boys being big enough to i earn their own livings, site might, by i tkrinchtng. manage to live on the little! matter of So a day, especially if she can : remember how she managed a few years j ago, when her husband was unknown to i fame, and worked as a common field hand j on a farm, before he "took up" lawyering in the inferior courts, from which hi 3 earn ings were but little increased until the 1 freak of fortune that threw him to the top ! of the bubbling cauldron. But she must' have forgotten how she managed in those good oIJ days, and therefore advertises a 1 few trifles of her personal wardrobe lor 1 sale, as follows: 1 bl'k centre camel's hair shaw, long $1,500 1 while centre do do do 1,200 1 white centre do do do 4©o 1 black centre do do square 350 1 red centre do do do 100 2 small shawls, square 50 1 white Paisley shawl, long 75 1 white Paisley shawl, square 50 3 supertiue point black lace shawls, $1.5u0, SSOO, S3OO 2 supeiflnc point black lace sh'is SSO, S4O 1 white point lace shawl, long 2,000 1 do do dress, unmade 4,000 1 do do flounce, 150 1 do do parasol cover 260 1 do do handkerchief 80 I Russian sable cape 1,500 1 do do boa 1,200 Also many other articles, including dia monds, rings, Aic. ifce. Let us hope that the "loyal" will buy up these old clothes and things at such pri ces as to enable the amieble widow to weather the Winter at least, in hopes that something may meanwhile "turn dp."— These aiticles are ou sale at the rooms of Mr. Brady, GO9 Broadway, and we cheer fully contribute this advertisement, as our share of the debt deemed due from the eountiy by this model of womanly refine ment, w luioine known, honored and court ed by ungrateful office seekers as "Mrs. Government." Where's "Flora McFlim scy ? ' VALUABLE RECIPES. To remove freckles, cut them out with a razor, and throw ihem away. They will never return. To bring out a moustaehe, tie to it a strong chord, twenty feet long, to the oth er end of which attach a heavy smoothing iron, and throw the latter trom a fourth storv window. To procure a fair complexion, go lo sea iu a crazy old boat, and the first gale you j get into, your lace will become white. To get rid of red hair, hold your bead! for a few minutes in a strong blaze of gas. 1 To preserve yout eves, put them iu a bottle filled with alcohol. To avoid corpulence, quit eating. To concetti had teeth, keep your mouth shut. 'Lo keep out of debt, acquire the reputa tion of a rascal, and no one will trust you. To keep your name up, write it fre quently ou the dome ot the Capital, the State House steeple, and other high pla ces To become a competent book keeper, boriow all the books you can, aud never return then). To "raise the stamps,'' say a funny thing on the stage. To keep your doors from being broken open hy burglars, don't close them. To keep out of a fight, stay by yourself. To gain time, steal a watch. To keep from stuttering, don't talk. To destroy rats, catch them one by one, and flatten their heads with a lemon squeezer. To kill cockroaches, get a pair of heavy boots, then catch j our roaches, put them in a barrel, and then get in and dance. To k;ll bedbugs, chain their hind legs to a tree, then go round in front and make mouths at them. To catch mice, on going to bed put crumbs of cheese into your mouth, and lie with it open, and when a mouse's whiskers tickle your throat, bite; To prevent dogs from going mad, cut their tails off just behind their ears. HUMILIATING, —If there b a circum stance in social life calculated to make a man diminished head," it is the discovery that some one has walked off with his hat. and left one several sizes too large. It is related that a nervous old mu J recently attempted to remove a large bug from the bonnet of a lady who sat in front of him at a theatre in New York.— The result was, be unroofed all her back hair, the bug's office being to hold head and hair together. TERMS, $2.00 Per. ANNUM, in Advance. NO. 11. | pise aift pljfttuiSE. New Axiom—A tbornin the bush is worth I two in the hand. lb the choice of a wife, take tiid obedient | daughter of a good mother. 1 Truth irritates those only whom it eolight* ens but does hot ton reft. Why does a bricklayer resemble a bird 1 l Because he has often raised a wing and Sue. A s.>und discretion is not so much indica ted by never making a mistake, as by never repeating one. The man who was hemmed in by a crowd has been.troubled with a stitch in his Side | ever since. I , "Grace before meat," as the young lady said when she laced herself too tight to swal low. A sermon in four words on tho vanity of 1 earthly possession : 'Shrouds have nopoca* eta." Delinquent school boys prefer a teacher ; witn an Italian hand. Up strokes heavy and the down strokes light. "Ma, if you will give me a peach I will be a good boy." "No, my child, you must not be good for ! pay ; that is not right." "You don't want me to be goad for nothing do you?" . "Pap," observed a young urchin of tendor j years to his fond parent, "does the lord know j evefything 7" "Yes, toy sofl," replied the hopeful siry; "but why do you aak that j question7" "Because our Preacher, when i he prays, is so long telling the Lord all about President Johnson, and the Rebels, I thought he was'nt poatsd." The parent re* fleeted. A Dutchman describing an accident i Vonce a long time ago, I vent into mine abbld j orchard to climb a bear tree to get some j beaches to make mine vrow a blum budding mit; and ven I gets on the toper moat limb ; branch, I fall down from the lowermost limb wid one leg on both sides of de fence and like to stove my outside in. This life the erad.'e of the other.— Whai, then, sickness, time, old age, death 7 —different degrees of a metamorphosis which ! doubtless has been here below only its be ginnings.—Joubcrt. —♦ The swan subdues the eagle when he at tacks on her own element; so the weakest may subdue his strongest foe, if he will but keep his place anu do his duty. "Is it not astonishing," said a wealthy in dividual, "that a large fortune was left me by a person who had only seen me once 7" "It would have beeri still mora astonishing," said a wag, "if he had left it to you after seeing you twice." An inquisitive urchin at Pittefield, Mass., while reciting a lesson, the other day, from Christ's Sermon on the Mount, broke out:— "Mother, did Jesus Christ get two thousand dollars a year for preaching, like our minis ter ?" The Boston Post says a lady passed through that city, on Wednesday, for the mountains, with sixteen trunks, four poodles, three maid servants, an Irishman and a husband. Thu latter appeared to be the least important part of the interesting group. Said a very good old man : "Some folks ere always complaining about the weather, but I am very thankful when I wake up in the morning to find any weather at all." A Farmer wrote as follows to a distinguish ed scientific agriculturalist, to whom he felt under great obligations for introducing e va liety of swine ' Respected Sir—l went yesterday to the cattle 6bow. I found sevei al pigs of your species. There was a.great variety of hogs, and I was astonished at not seeing you there, "The only Liberty Cap," says a elever and witty author, "is the night cap. In it men visit, one third ol there lives, the land of aleep the only land wbe they are free and equal,' Josh Billings correctly remarks : "Success in life iz very apt low make us forjai the time when we was'nt much. It is juat so with the frog on the jump ; ha kant remem ber when he was a k tadpole—but other folks kan. A Texat paper hu a poet. Hero ! one of his stansas "The Lambkin Crops its Crimson gem The Blue Fly Bends Its pensil stem The wild Bee munnnrs on Its Breast Right ©V the Sky Lark's Nest." "The devil jumped up, in a terrible rage, X sat two lutes to fill out tbia page.'