Bates of Advertising, Advertisements will be charged 81 per square of fourteen lines, for one, or three insertions, and 25 cents for every subsequent insertion. AlUdvertise ments of less than fourteen lines considered as a souaie. The following rales will be charged for Quarterly, Half-Yearly and Yearly advertising:— 3 months. 6 months. 12 tJio’s 2& e ; (unnes,) •«» I°o°o iro”™’’- - 10 00 1500 20 00 1 column.- -1800 3000 4000 All adverli* slll6o46 not paving (he number of in sertions marked upon them, will be kept in until or. dered oot. « nd charged accordingly. v 'Posters, Handbills, Bill,and Letter Heads, and all kinds of Jobbing done in country establishments, executed neatly and promptly. Justices 1 , Consta bles* and other BLANKS, constantly on hand and printed to order. The Capture of Joe Bettys. Although Ihe event of which we are about to speak created no peculiar excitement at the time out of the immediate neighborhood of its occurrence, and has been noticed by but few historians, yet it was one °l" mani fold importance to tbfe inhabitants of a large and thickly-settled section of the country, where it occasioned the most intense interest for a lime. Joseph or “Joe” Bettys, ar he was com monly called, was a tesident of Ballston when the Revolution .commenced, and early look sides with the Republicans. A ser geant’s warrant was procured for him, and he joined Col. Wyncoop’s but his temper and disposition were so intractable that he was soon reduced to the ranks for some act of insubordination. His friends, however, knowing his character for deter mined ■ bravery and courage, and unwilling that his services should be lost to the country, procured another warrant for him, and had him transferred to the fleet, under Arnold, on Lake Champlain. In the naval battle which soon afterward occurred he eminently distin guished himself for daring and indomitable gallantry, and, all the officers on board his vessejdmving been killed or wounded, he took Ihe command himself, and fought her with the utmost intrepidity, until General Water bury—Arnold’s second in command—was obliged to order him to repair with the sur vivors of’ his crew on board his own vessel. Here he continued to fight with the reckless contempt of danger peculiar to his disposition, lomil this vessel in turn became crippled, the General wounded, most of the crew killed, and only Bettys and two others left in a fighting condition, when it was surrendered to the enemy. The prisoners were taken to Canada, and while there Betlys was seduced from his alle giance, and entered the service of the ene mies of his country, with the rank of ensign. His intimate knowledge of the countr y ren dered his services as a messenger and a spy —in which capacities he was almost con stantly employed—of great value, and his fearful and bloodthirsty disposition made him a formidable enemy. During one of his mis sions he was captured, and narrowly escaped the gallows. He had been condemned to suffer death, but the entreaties of his aged parents, and influence of many friends, obtained a pardon at the hands of General Washington. Instead of feeling grateful for this act of generosity, his feelings were very much embittered by the danger he had es caped, and he lost no lime in regaining the ranks of the enemy, rrom mis time tie seemed to have cast aside all ves'ige of hu manity, and, guided by alt the dictates of a fiendish nature, without the slightest com punctions of conscience, or feeling of pity or commiseration, he ranged the neighborhood of his early home, becoming a scourge to his former friends and neighbors. Possessed of an uncommon amount of shrewdness and intelligence for one in his station of life, powerlul and pthlelic, cold, revengeful and cruel, inflexible in his determination, untiring in his purposes, and knowing no fear, he was well calculated to excite terror among the people of the border settlements. With a desperate boldness seldom equaled, ha eschew ed all disguises, and made his appearance openly in the midst of the settlers—sometimes alone, at others accompanied by kindred spirits—and never taking bis departure without leaving mourning, misery and sorrow in his track. He proclaimed himself an outlaw, arid dared any to attempt his capture, saying he was as careless of his own life as he should be of the lives of those who should ' undertake such a task. He declared that he never would be taken alive, and that his death would be fearfully avenged by his fol lowers upon the heads of those who should iCause it. h is not to be wondered at, therefore, that his name became as terrific to the set tlers as were those of the bold buccaneers of old to the inhabitants of the Spanish Main, or that he should for a time be successful in his murderous forays against the Republi cans. He seized the persons of many of the most influential and active Whigs, whom he carried to Canada, subjecting them to the most cruel and inhuman treatment by the way. Such as he entertained a particular resentment against lost their dwellings by fire, and sometimes their lives. His boldness and audacity had so increased by the success of his expeditions that, on one occasion, he .made an excursion into the city of Albany, for llhe purpose of abducting the person of Gen leral Schuyler. There were those, however, (hold and fearless enough to undertake his ire, and many were the attempts made lat purpose before success crowded the * . was successful at last, and oc ■d in the following manner: Three men, lents of Ballston, hearing that a suspi -3 stranger had been seen, thoroughly id, and on snow shoes, making his way rd f he of a well-known loyalist, satisfied of the identity 0 f lhe de . /ned to make a bold and strenuous effort ke him alive. Their names were Corev ms and Fulmer; and. havivg armed ■selves they started in pursuit. The trail nem by a circuitous route to the house ‘, lory before mentioned, which they uLn W|lh lhe . Ulmost circumspection; ■overed ml °. lhe window*, they ie lahlo h j ° bjecl of ,heir search seated led Dren-. dl j CU^SIDS 0 hear, y meal - He Is lav on te ?t, r ° r aD emer B eDc y for bis whL Slde of hiin * read y lo h,s muzzfl 18 nfle B,ood h® l * 060 his knees, m • eslln S ln the hollow of his shoul biirJ B *’ arrao B ed 'heir 1 plan, they sod unnn ;£ pen . tho door > and in an instant, P he miscreant, wljo did not yield THE AGITATOR acbotcV to t&e SSjrtetiffCotf of tfte of iFm&om auK tf)t SpicaD of 2&ealt|)£ itefom. WHILE THEBE SHALL BE A WEOKG UNSIGHTED, AND UNTIL “Man’s INHUMANITY TO MAN 11 SHALL CEASE, AGITATION MUST CONTINUE. VOL. IV. without a fearful contest. He attempted to his rifle, but having neglected to remove the deerskin covering of the lock, did not succeed in so doing; and before he could seize his pistols he was himself seized in the powerful grasp of two of the intrepid men, while the third presented bis bayonet at his breast, threatening him with instant death if he did not surrender. Unarmed as he was, it cost a herculean struggle to over come him, and bind bis limbs beyond the possibility of escape. The three were an overmatch for him, however, and he was at length secured. After a while he requested permission to smoke, and as he was lighting his pipe he was seen to cast something into the fire, wnich was immediately seized, and proved to be a hollow ball, containing a mes sage in cypher to Sir Henry Clinton, with an order for thirty guineas on its delivery. He plead hard with his captors for permission to burn the papers, and offered one hundred guineas for the privilege. All his offers were refused with scorn, and becoming satisfied of the impossibility of bribing his captors, he exclaimed, “Then I’m a dead man,” It was even so. He was not allowed again to escape, but he was taken to Albany, where he was tried, condemned, and executed as a spy- The capthrs of Bellys were deserving of the same if nol higher honors than those con ferred upon the captors of Andre. The latter was unarmed, and his capture was the result of accident j while the former was nol taken without the risk of life, and after a fearful struggle. He was known to be thoroughly armed, and a desperado of the worst charac ter and a disposition. Bettys was a far more dangerous 'man, though, perhaps, not so im portant as Andre. Both tempted their cap tors with gold, and the offers of both were spurned with contempt. In this the cases were similar, and in view of ulterior conse quences, perhaps, the importance of the cap. lure rests with Paulding, Williams and Van Wen ; but, when viewed in the light of the peril of Ihe enterprise, Cotey, Perkins and Fulmer are deserving of the warmest praise for their bravery and intrepidity. Yet Ihe only return they received was the arms of their prisoner, w.hde the others received rich rewards, and were honored after death by monuments, upon which, as well as upon the page of history, their patriotism and- honesty have been lauded to the skies. With what a partial hand is the meed of praise bestowed I Editorship.— We have known a very learned gentleman to obligingly bring us a contribution with the remark, that aa wa word continually occupied, it must doubtless be quite an accommodation to receive a good article once in awhile—and on examining the “good” article in question, we have found three gross grammatical errors, divers sins of awkwardness, and two words misspelled in the fust and second sentences. A lecture which will bear printing as it is deliveied, is an exception ; and in a word, there are very few men, who have not served a regular ap preuticeship to Ihe types, who can sit down, and without “bailor let,” express their lliol’a readily and fluently in writing. Yet with all this, we daily meet with gentlemen who, be cause they have made an occasional hit in a letter to a friend, or have elaborated a drawl ing poem in some incautious paper, talk dar ingly and dashingly of journalism, and gra ciously inform us how they would make things fly rounds if they were only editors. Singular—every man no matter how stu pid be is, always seems to be morally con vinced that if everything else fails, be can either’ manage a small farm or edit a paper— and experience shows that where there are a hundred educated young men capable of suc cessfully practicing a profession, there is not more than one or two who is really enough a genius, a scholar, and a man of practical sense to make a good editor. In fact, though all the world read papers, there are very few out of the business who have ever taken the pains to acquire much information relative to it—and the natural coneequence is that its difficulties are unappreciated. —Boston Inves tigator. Contentment.— Napoleon when at the height of his power, happened to be at the Amiens, and as he was crossing the public square to leave the city, amidst the acclama tions of all iis inhabitants, who had run in crowds and almost blocked up the passage, he cast bis eyes over the immense multitude, and discovered in one corner of the square, a stone culler, whose attention had not been one moment drawn from bis labor by all the splendor of the spectacle. The singular in difference of this man excited the curiosity of the Emperor ; he desired to know something of him, and spurred his horse onward, and stopped directly in front of ihe man. “What are you doing there?” asked the Emperor, with the pleasant tones which dis tinguished him on such occasions. The workman raised his eyes and recog. nized the Emperor. “Sir,” answered he, “I am hewing this stone you see.” “You have been in the army have you not ?” said the Emperor, whe recognized in him an old soldier. “You made the cam paign of Egypt—were you not an under officer ?” “h was even so, sir.” “And why did you leave the servive,” "Because 1 served out my lime and ob tained my discharge.’’ “I am sorry Cor il—you are a fine fellow —I am desirous of doing something for you— speak, what do you wish ?” "Only that your Majesty would allow me to hew this stone. My labor procures me all I want; I have no need of anything;” WELLSBORO, TIOGA COUNTY, PA., THURSDAY MORNING. AUGUST 27, 1857. The Capitol Extension. The progress within the last few weeks of the work on the Capitol extension, has been such as to be very palpable even to the ordi nary observer. In particular, the removal of the wilderness of scaffolding from the in terior of the great halls of the Senate and House of Repiesenlaliues, makes the advance striking. Of both these spacious and noble halls the ceilings are finished and out of hand, and present a beauty of style, workmanship and completeness superior to anything of the kind on this continent. That of the House is the warmest in style and most elaborated finish; but there are tastes which, on the whole, may prefer the Senate’s. Both how ever, are akin in their general manner, and only differ ns good tastes would have them do. We find the flooring of the committee and other rooms, halls, passages and avenues of both the new wings to be proceeding rapidly. In the northern wing, the workmen are now pulling np the newel-posts, railings and fenc ings of the main passages to the Senate cham ber, all of which posts, rails and fencing are of Tennesee marble, and therefore of unsur passed richness and beauty. Toour eye this is the most beautiful marble work we have ever seen. In both the connection wings be tween the old Capitols and wings, (tie pro gress is such as to have arisen to the level of the ground, and on Ihe south connection some what above it. As to ihe undertaking of raising the new dome on (he old or central building; it is pro ceeding steadily and surely. Of the general plan of the dome it is sufficient to say that its bulk is divided into four sections—the first occupied by thirty-six columns of cast iron twenty feet high, and about three (eet in di ameter at the top. These columns rest on a foundation consisting of cast iron plate, which again rests on a circular wall, belted, girded, cramped and compacted by every judicious imaginable contrivance, into a mass of solid matter, forming as it were, but a single body. On these columns (which are hollow and about an inch.thick,) when in position, will be placed a ring to form the foundation for a superimposed section of pilasters, less in size than (he columns, but agreeing with the'tn in number, on which will he a strong panel work, constituting a third section or attic.— The fourth section is a dome or cupola prop er, and differs from other domes in having an elliptical instead of a circular section. The whole will be surrounded by stout circular plates of iron of considerable thickness, bear ing an altar-like structure, girt with faces, all l wut' t p > ads Pluribus Unum,” and on Ihe globe stands a tall figure of the Goddess of Liberty, erect, with a sword and shield and around her fore head a fillet studded with stars, being Craw ford’s greatest'work. —National Intelligen cer. Tea Tasting.— The Nef York corres pondem gives the following particulars of the effects of “tea tasting’’ and jsampling upon the constitutions of those engaged in,lhe btfsi ness: , “The death of a famous lea broker in this city lately, calls to mind the curious nature of this business.- I wonder if any of your readers at the West know that their fastidi ousness in the choice of the herb which cheers, but not inebriates, is the cause of the establishment of a profession, called “tea tasting”—which is as certain death to a man .as the continued practice of opium eating.— The success of the tea broker or taster de pends upon the trained accuracy of his nose and palato, his experience in the want of the American market, and a keen business tact. If he has these qualities in high cultivation he may make from 820,000 to per annum while he lives, and die of ulceration of the lungs. He overhauls a cargo of lea, classifies it, and determines the value of each sort. In doing this he first looks at the col or of the leaf and the general cleanliness of it. He next takes a quantity of the herb in his hand, and breathing his warm breath on it, snuffs up the fragrance. In doing this he draws into his lungs a quantity of irritating and stimulating dust which is by no means wholesome. Then sitting down at the table in his office, on which is a long row of little porcelain cups and a pot of hot water, he “draws” the tea and tastes the infusisn. In this way He classifies the different sorts of the minutest shade, marks the different prices and is then ready to compare his work with the invoice. The skill of these tasters is fairly marvellous, but the effect of the busi ness on their health is, as 1 have said, ruin ous. They grow lean, nervous and con sumptive. __ Taking it Coorxv.—The following is the latest joke upon John Bull: John was traveling on some Western rail road, when a tremendousexplosion took place, the cars at the same time coming to a sudden halt. The passengeis sprang up in terror, and rushed out to acquaint themselves with the mischief—all but Mr. Bull, who contin ued reading his newspaper. In a moment somebody rushed back and informed him that the boiler had burst. “Awe!” muttered the Englishman. “Yes,” continued his informant, “and six teen persons have bqen killed.” “Awe?” grunted l the Englishman again. “And—and” said his interlocutor, with an effort, “your own man—your servant—has been blown into a hundred pieces. “Awe ! bring me the piece that has the key of my portmanteau .” “Mike is it yourself that can be afiher telling me how they make ice crames ? “Truth I can ; don’t they bake them in could ovens, to be sure. Oreide--The New Substitute for Gold. The manufacture of this new metal, oreide, under the French patent of H. Migeon, grant* ed In this country March 3, 1857, has been commenced on a large scale in Waterbury, Connecticut, and it will undoubtedly soon be in use, as itlis already in France for various articles of domestic economy and all sons of ornamentation, as it bears the tame relation to gold as German silver to pure silver; like German silver] it may be used in a pure con dition, or as a base of gold plating. It bears so strong a resemblance to gold that when manufactured into fine articles, such as we have been accustomed to see made only of gold, wB-ere-at once convinced that the arti cle we are handling is really the pure metal, yet it is made of material that costs only eighty cents a pound as it comes from the furnace where the several metals of its com position are refined into ingots.- The oreide is not a new metal—it is only a new com pound of old metals, so refined in the process as to have done away with a great part of their disposition to oxidize, as it only tarnish es in about the same degree as silver, and though ebulition lakes , place, if tested with nitric acid, it does not leave a black spot, so that it may be actually cleaned with acids which would destroy such metals as copper or brass. We have examined the metal in bars and sheets, prepared for the manufac ture of various articles] and also in its man ufactured slate—in spoons, sugar-tongs, nap kin rings, goblets, buttons, watch chains, va rious articles of plain and chased jewelry and cast ornaments, and plates of various thick jiess from tin foil to the sixteenth of an inch thick, combined with gold, so as to show gold upon one side and the oreide upon the other, and it was certainly very difficult to tell which was gold and which was oreide. That it is an improvement in the arts there can be no doubt, and that it so much resembles gold as to make it necessarry for our Legislature at once to require, as in France, that all arti cles should be stamped “oreide” to prevent •great frauds, will probably be found out after a great many people have been pretty severly cheated. This alloy (oreide) is formed of 100 parts by weight of pure copper, 19 of zinc, 6 of magnesia, .3 and three-fifths of sal ammoniac, l and four-fifths parts of quick lime, and 9 of unpurjiietl tartar. Whistling “Yankee Double” into Eu rope.—Hon. Robert C. Wimhrop, in his ad dress to the Boston Musical Festival, told the following incident: ...ity'OF pfes/Ttf'U'Slift" i n li i /?£ p * l m.svru'be festival or banquet, or it might have been a ball was about to lake place, at which it was proposed to pay the customary musical com pliment to all the sovereigns who were either present or represented on the occasion. The sovereign people of the United States—repre sented there as you remember, by Mr. Adams, Mr. Bayard, Mr. Clay, Mr. Jonathan Russel and Mr. Gallatin—were of course, not to be overlooked; and the musical band master of the place called upon these commissioners to furnish hirn, with our na tional air. “Our national air,” said they, is Yankee Doodle.” “Yankee Doodle,” said the conductor, “what isj that ? Where can I find it ? By whom was it composed ? Can you supply us with the score!” The per plexity of the Commissioners may be better conceived than described. They were fairly at their wit’s end. They had never imagined that they would have scores of this sort to settle, and each turned to the other in despair. At length they bethought them, in a happy moment, that there was a colored servant of Clay, who, like many of his race, was a first rale whistler, and who! was certain to know Yankee Doodle by heart. He was sent for accordingly, and the problem was solved with out further delay. The band master jolted down the air as the colored boy whistled it ; “and before night,” said Mr. Adams, “Yan kee Doodle was set to so many parts that you would hardly know it, and lit came out the next day in all the pride, pomp and cir cumstance of viol and hautboy, of drum," trumpet and cymbal, to the edification of the Allied Sovereigns of Europe, and to the glo rification of the United Sovereigns of the U. S. of America.” ! Mn. Brown Treats am. his Customers. —Some years ago Ben Brown opened a store in Swoplown, and decided to treat every one buying at his store. Money being pretty scarce, there was a good deal of barter go ing on in those days, so Sam Jones called in to the grocery and dry goods store of Mr. Brown and asked for a darning needle offer ing in exchange an egg. After receiving the needle, Jones said : I “Come ain’t you a going to treat?” “Wbat, on that trade ?” “Certainty ; a trade’s a; trade let it be big or little.”, 1 “Well,'what will you take?” “A glass of wine,”| said Jones. The wine was poured out, when Jones said: “Would it be asking too much to request you to put an egg in the wine? lam very fond of wine and egg.” Appalled by the man’s meanness, the store keeper look the identical egg which he had received for the darning needle and handed it to his customer, who on breaking it discov ered that it contained a double yolk. “Look here,” said the sponge don’t you think you ought to give me another darning needle? This you see is a double yolk,” The great scientific, question in Cincinnati at the present time is, “Which is the Old World, and which is the New ?” The opin ion is evidently gaining ground “out West,” that we have long been laboring under an error on this point. | (®utr ComfluoniJrncr. Fbiesd Cobb :—ln my last communica. tion to you I mentionefFa proposed journey to the Chippewa River and parts contiguous, and the furnishing to you Of ‘'held notes” ol the same &c., but like human of future events ibis one of mine was doomed to fail, and “for reasons too numerous to mention,” I didn’t go to Chippewa and you will have to do without the “field notes” for the present. I will simply say that having passed through that country last fall I had ocular demonstration of its general charac ter, and taking in addition the description giv. en by those conversant with its advantages, I consider it a desirable point for any who wish to engage either in agriculture or lumbering, and in fact the same thing may be truthful!’ .mng may be truthfully asserted of the whole district | lying between Lake St. Croix and the Chippewa River.— The crops in this upper counlfy'are extreme ly good, better I think on the average than I ever saw in any country before. Hay, oats, potatoes, wheat, rye, barley, and in fact all crops except corn will give an abundant yield. Corn looks finely and fair for a good crop, except that it is from ten days to two weeks later than usual owing to the universal late spring, and should the fajl season be fa vorable we will still have a good crop of corn. Our farmers are-nearly through with their haying and have commenced harvesting their wheat and oats. We have plenty of new potatoes and all other vegetables incident to this season in Pa. The weather during the summer has been as fine as the most fastidious could wish, whether viewed with an eye to pleasure or profit. I think I never witnessed so fine a season before; no sudden chinges, but one continued succession of warm days and de liciously cool evenings. For the most part we have had a cloudless sky with a gentle brewo from the north-western lakes and plains, and interspersed by just enough re freshing showers to supply the wants of vege tation. The political parties here are just waking up to new life and marshaling their forces for the coming autumnal battle 1 . The Repub licans confident of success are thoroughly or ganizing and selecting their csndidales, while (he democracy divided against itself by the so called “forty thief” party’s iaving"Usurped all the fat offices, is distracted, unorganized and impotent for any good otj evil so far as success at the polls is concerned. The Minesoia optn aowJhsjiJJ s>i\s I wiv r v& ywwy unani mous in denouncing (he border ruffian faction headed by the notorious Gorman, who three months ago was the special mark for the ven om of the very men who now| fall down and worship him. The charge then was political corruption, and the people here cannot dis cover that the cause has been! removed; but with the border-ruffian cliques the difference is that “the bool is on the other foot.” The Republican members met at ihe lime speci fied in the enabling act and having a working majority organized and proceeded to business and will have a constitution framed and ready to submit to the people in course of two or three months. On the other hand the se cessionists have refused or neglected to pre sent their credentials, and have met daily in a room adjoining to receive a political sermon from the great Gorman and hen adjourn to the next day to receive the, same thing re hashed. They have not as yet organized their revolutionary band for the simple rea son that they have not members enough to form a quorum, although they have already manufactured enough (some 0 or 7) with the exception of one, and this one they can as easily manufacture as they have the others and probably wiU ere long do so. The whole thing is an abominable politictjl'farce, and the disorganizes avow that if cannot rule they will prevent Minnesota Ijom coming in to the Union at ail. They do not even claim that they have a quorum legally elected, and the whole press of the norlh|-wbsl (with the exception of 3 journals in thei( pay; denounce their revolutionary proceedings. The people of the Territory are indignant and could an election be held to day Mihetota would roll up such a majority for the_cause of freedom as was never dreamed of in your philosophy. There has been a good deal of difficulty on the western frontier of Mineuota during the summer with the Sioux Indians of which you have been advised by the press. But as Gov ernment has made arrangements to send a new supply of troops to the Territory it is hoped these troops will keep the red skins in awe until the difficulties between them and government can be so settled as to prevent hostilities for the future. Tire country here is filling up with emigrants very fast, and the sound of the busy hammer salutes our ears bn all sides. Business of all kinds seems to be in a flourishing condition. Money is plen ty and labor of ail kinds in demand. The people generally eschew visionary specula tions and have gone to becoming producers, and in view of this he can safely predict the “good lime coming.” Yours truly, C. V. E. Hudson Wis, July 31st 1^57. Prejudice may be compared to a misty morning in October ; a man goes forth to an eminence, and he sees at the summit of a neighboring hill a figure, apparently ol gi gantic; stature, for such the imperfect medium through which he is viewed would make him appear; he goes forward a few steps, and the figure advances towards him; the lessens as they approach ;S they draw still nearer, and the extraordinary appearance is gradually but sensibly diminished; at last they meet, and perhaps what the person had taken for a monster proves to be his brother. THE TIOGA COUNTY AGITATOR is pub,, lished every Thursday Morning, and. mailed to sub-1 acribers at the very reasonable psice of On* Dol per annum, inrxiriahly to afytaee* It is intend ed to notify eve 17 subscriber vhpn l.he l£*m fo? which he has paid shall have expired, by the stamp. •«— u Time Oat,” on the margin of the last paper. The paper wUUheo be slopped until a further re-, miltancc be received. By this arrangement a* can be brought in debt to the printer. The Agitator is the Official Paper of the Court ly, with & large and steadily increasing circoJatioiv reaching into nearly every neighborhood in tha County. It is sent free of postage to any Post offica within the county limits, and to those living the limits,but whose moslconvenient postoffice may: be in an adjoining County. I NO. Y. Business Cards, not exceeding $ lines, paper iq. ejpded, $4 per year. Fun in Court.—A ludicrous item of tes timony was squeezed out of a village ga,llanl at Mediop, us. the course of ;be Coroner’s in vestigation. Mr. Amiadab Doolittle was called on the witness stand, blushing in an ticipation of the revelations he might be called upon to make. John W. Graves, Esq., who conducted the case, “pm him through,” as folio* s; Graves—“Wbete were you on Sunday eve* □in® last V’ | Doolittle—“At the Methodist Church sis.’' Graves—“ Where did you go after church, sir.” , Doolittle —“Well, I went down C— street.” Graves—“ What house did you go to on C— street ¥ x Doolittle—“ Well,! went—l went to—well I don’t know as I’m obliged to tell where I went.’’ Graves—-“ You are obliged to tell—so oat with it.” Doolittle—“l went to Mr, Biggin's.” Graves: —“How late did you alay 1” Doolittle—“l staid till—well about ten o'- clock.” Graves—“ Where did you go then?” Doolittle—“ Didn’t go anywhere—l staid at Mr. Higgin’s.” Graves—“ How late did you stay ?” Doolittle—“l staid till—till —f-guess aboul 11 o’clock.” Graves—“ Yes, and where did you go then ?" Doolittle—Didn!l go anywhere—l staid at Mr. Higgins— till about half past eleven .” Graves—“ Well, then where did you go?” Doolittle—“l went to—l don’t know, sir, that I’m obliged to leli where I went,” Graves—“ You are, obliged to tell, sir— where did you go ?” Doolittle—“l went to—well—l didn’t go anywhere,. By special request I stayed alt night!" Shan’t Bite Me. —There was a fellow of a certain neighborhood in Arkansas, who was strongly suspected of sheep stealing. There were weekly many oases of the. mysterious disappearance of choice mutton front the flocks of the planters which were traded to his door j but being an ingenious chap, ha generally succeeded in proving an alabi or some other defence, which reduced the charge to a mere suspicion. At last, however, a planter riding- through the woods perceived the suspected sheep.’thief stealing from the woods, and after, lnnlrim», up to a'ttock of sheep and deliberately knocked over the largest and fattest. At Ibis moment the planter rode up, and confronting the thief, exclaimed: “Now, sir, I have got you! You can’t get off; you are caught in the act!” “What act Y’ indignantly demanded the thief. • Sheep-stealing,” was the confident reply “Sir you had better mind how you charge a respectable American citizen with such a crime as sheep-stealing,” replied the gentle man with the penchant for mutton. “Now will you deny that I saw you kill that sheep'!” asked the planter. “No, sir,” was the prompt answer, “I did kill him, and I’d do it agam. I’ll kill any body’s sheep that bites me as I am going peaceably along the road.” Two young misses, discussing the qualities of some young gentleman, were ovetheard thus: No. X. “Well, I like Charley, but he is rather girlish, he hasn’t got the least bit of a beard.” ' No. 2. “I say Charley has a beard, but he shaves it off.” No. X. “No he hasn’t either, any more than I have.” No. 2. “I say he has, too, and I know it, for it pricked my cheek'' The Boston Traveller tells of a patriotic poet of Philadelphia, who has written a pome on Mr. Buchanan, in which he invokes him, in settling the Kansas and other difficulties, to — s. We hope Mr. Buchanan will not do any such ridiculous thing. Let him at least adopt the Texan costume —s'hirl collar and spurs. In Missouri they fight duels on slight pro vocations ; recently two public characters came near introducing lead into each other’s systems because one of therp spelt rascal with a “k.” The party to whom the epithet was applied didn’t mind being called a rascal, but to have it written in such a villianous or thography was more than human nature could submit (o. “How do you Teel with such a shocking looking com on V’ said a young clerk of more pretensions than brains, one morning. “[ feel,” said the old Roger, looking at him steadily, with one eye half closed, as if taking aim at his victim, “I feel, young man, as if I had on a coal which had' beta paid for—a luxury of feeling I think you will never ex perience.” A gentleman once conversing in the soci. ely of a company of ladies and criticising rather severely the,want of personal beauty in other ladies of their acquaintance, said— “ They are the ugliest women I know,’’ and then with an extraordinary politeness, added, “present company always excepted.” A Harrisburg paper gives the following case of absence of mind i A girl who was one of our first loves, was one night lighting us out, after having passed a delightful even ing, and in a bashful trepidation she blew us out, and drew the candle behind the door and kissed it. Terms of Publication. “Arm ! Go forth naked to the fight 1”