The Waynesboro' village record. (Waynesboro', Pa.) 1871-1900, October 15, 1874, Image 1

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    BY W. BLAIR.
VOLUME 27.,
g , tint- pottrg. •
SEA DREAMS.
BY JOHN G. WHITHER
The waves are glad in breeze and sun,
- The rocks are ringed with foam ;
I walked once more - a haunted shore,
A stranger, yet at home—
A land of dreams I roam !
Is this the wind, the soft sea wind
That stirred thy locks of brown?
Are these the rocks whose mosses knew
The trail of thy light gown
Where boy and girl sat down?
I see the gray fort's broken wall,
The boat that rocks below-;
And, out at sea, the passing sails
We saw so long ago,
Ilose-red in morning's glow.-
The freshness of the early time
On every breeze is blown;
As glad the sea, as blue the sky—
The change is ours alone;
The-saddest is my own
A stranger MAY, a world-worn man
Is he who bears my name ;
But thou, methinks, whoe mortal life
Immortal youth became,
Art evermore the same. ' •
Thou art not here, thou art not there,
Thy place I cannot see ;
I only know that where thou art
The blessed angels be,
And heaven is glad for thee.
Forgive me if the evil years
Have left on me their sign ;
Wash out, 0 soul so beautiful,
•The many stains of mine
In tears of love divine !
Oh, turn to me that dearest face
Of all thy sea-born town,
The wedded roses of thy lips,
The loose hair rippling doWn
In waves of golden brown!
Look forth once more thro' space and time
And let thy sweet shade fall
In tenderest grace of soul anti form
On memory's frescoed wall,
A shadow, and yet all
Draw near, more near, forever dear!
Whereer I rest or roam,
Or in the crowed city streets,
Or by the brown sea foam,
The thought of thee is BOILE!
atlistellaurous lleading.
WHAT CAME OF MAKING
PICKLES.
"Well, love, my poor child," said a
dignified old gentleman. "I have looked
your matters all over, and I must say I
see nothing but starvation befbreyou and
your family."
"Well, taller," replied a bright little
woman of twenty-five years, in a tremb
ling voice, "I've not theleast idea of starv
ing, nor of letting my family starve—not
if God spares my health."
"You were always a brave child, Love,
but this is a terrible crisis. It would be
cruel in any one to taunt you now, but
remember that I told you and George
that it was very imprudent for a man to
marry till he bad something ahead for an
emergency."
"I remember, father, that you thought
I should be wiser to marry a man with a
house and store,for whwn I did not care,
than to marry George, With two thousand
a year. But if I had the choice to make
over again to-day, I should do just as I
did then. I wouldn't change places with
any woman on earth, even now."
"You are a faithful wife and a brave lit
tle woman, Love, but—"
"But what, father?"
"You can't live on in this way child."
"But I will live, father and live well,
too, and take care of George and the ba
bies."
"How ?" Ay, that was the word that
had been ringing in the heart of this - brave
little woman ever since the day that her
husband failed at his desk,and was brought
home apparently dying. She knew that
she could rear the pillars Of her domestic
structure herself, but how?
"Well, Love I will do what I can fin•
you," said the old gentleman, "and—and
—if it were only for you and the babies,
I should say at once come home, and be
us welcome there as you were flair years .
ago : but you know the house is so small
we haven't room ' in it."
Love smiled a sad smile, and then said,
perhips a little provokingly, "Four of us
would occupy no more chambers than
three ; the babies are too little to be away
from us at night. But. if your house were
twice as large, father, I could not take my
husband's gentle home away from him,
now that he is sick. I shall have to de
cide soon, and will let you know my
plans."
The respectable old gentleman rose up,
and with his handkerchief polished his
already shining beaver, kissed Love, pat
ted the heads of the babies, and turned to
go, saying, "Keep up a good heart, child,
and remember that the ravens fed Elijah."
"Well, I don't want them to feed me ;
I prefer to feed myself," replied the spun
ky little. woman, who felt that it was rath
er hard in her father to discourage her,
and thou exhort her to "keep up a good
heart."
She loved the old man, although he
was stiff and narrow in his views, and nev
er forgot any slight offered his judgment.
She followed him 'to the dorr, and said,
"Good-bye, father; give my loVe to moth
er," although the real mother, who would
have found room enough in her heart and
home for them all, had 'been for years in
the grave.
It was twilight, and as the old gentle
man was going. down the steps a young
man came up.
"Ah, good-evening, good-evening," said
the stout, good-natured hotel-keeper to
both, and then added to-Love,--"'Here-1
am on the old borrowing business. My
wife says she can't .please the lawyers in
court time since you and she changed
pickles and honey. Old Squire Watts
called out the minute he sat down to sup
per, 'Come, Bruce, borrow some of that
neighbor's pickles for us.' Them pickles
is a standin' joke among them. Why
can't nobody in town make pickets and
chow chow like yourn ? My wife's a cook
that can't he beaten bread and meats and
pastry and cake, but she ought. to 'pren
tice, herself to you on some things "
Love,- who had had known Bruce all
her life, smiled, and said:
"I will give you a jar with all my heart,
Mr. Bruce, and that won't half pay your
wife for the nice things she has sent in to
poor George. I have my cucumbers all
ready now to make next year's pickles,
and I yet-haVe - two or - three jars WO - -
"Suppose we make a bargain,Mrs. Bart.
I'll buy two barrels at the best Boston
price, if you'll make them for me, and
chow-chow and catsup too."
Love laughed, and the hotel-keeper
went down with her to get the jar. The
o man went down the street, whispering,
with 'a sigh, "The Lord knows what's go
ing- to feed that family.;. ,I can't do it, for
wife says I can't ; and she knows every
thing most ; and Love is terribly obsti
nate."
Well, the lintel-keeper ran back the
next moment with his pickle jar, as hap•
py as some men would have been to find
a nugget of gold that size, for he had a
rival who kept the old tavern, and he
wanted to, keep all the lawyers who came
there to hold court as his customers.
Love had a long talk with her husband
that night. The nest day an old school
friend, who had always been like a sister,
came to stop with the sick man and to
look after the babies, and she went to Bos
ton, ten miles away, in an early train,
with a neat little basket in her hands.—
lf
. anyone had been near enough, win u
she put her little basket on the platform
of the depot with such spirit, he might
have heard her whisper :
"See if my family starves while I'm a
live and in my health l"
The day was lovely, and everybody on
the ears and on 'the street looked cheerful
and happy. Of course there were sick,
and lame, and blind, and deaf people,and
beggars plenty in the world, but Heaven
was keeping them out of her sight that
day, and bringing before her only happy
grown folks and merry little ones.
The streets looked so clean and the air
seemed so pure that she charged herself
with having often borne false witness a
gainst the beautiful, as she ran with light
heart through Washington, Tremont and
Court streets, arid Bowdoin square first, to
a store and then to the hotel. In each
place she asked for the proprietor or the
steward, and opening her basket, drew out
three little glass jars of what the hotel
keeper at home had called-"sour things."
In one . minute she told her business and
the necessity that brought her out on it.
Her cheerful face, her prompt manner,
and her well-chosen words gained the vicl
tory for her. She went back at night
pledged to supply home-made pickles,
chow-chow and catsup for three hotels and
•five large groceries, anti she whispered as
she mounted the steps of her little home.
"I'll show father whether or not we aro
going to starve."
Her cheerful story of success did more
for her poor, disheartened young husband
than a peck of Old School pills or four ti
ny New School ones could have done. The
very story of an old woman's .poke-bonnet,
which was worn one-sided in the cars to
blind one eye, and of the silly airs of a
silly bride, and of a boy with two . guina
pigs buttoned into his jacket for safe tran
sportation, really brightened the hope of
life in his heart, and after partaking of a
nice supper prepared by their pretty friend
he said :
"Now, girls, I feel as if I was going to
gec about again, and this is the first time
I. have had any hope !"
Love kept away from her father till she
had visited a market garden in the out
skirts of the town and engaged a great
supply of cucumbers, onions, peppers and
tomatoes,and had brought back the strong
girl she had fist felt obliged to dismiss, to
help her in her new work.
But if you only could have seen the size
of the old gentleman's
,eyes, and the style
of mouth he got up, and heard his excla
mation, "Why, - Love, you are crazy !
What will your mother say? You surely
forgot that her fiat husband was the Pres
ident of the —National Bank, and
that I m cashier of it! Whoever heard
of a bank officer's daughter making pick
les for taverns and groceries ?" .
"Who ever heard of 'a bank officer's
daughter sitting down and starving when
trouble comes," replied the little lady.
"\Vhy don't you teach music?"
"Because 1 don't know enough."
"You might keep a few very genteel—
well, not just boarders, but friends who
don't care to keep house, and would pay
largely?"
"Where are they, and where's the house
and furniture for them?"
"0, that's true. But you might—eh?
or might—eh?" and here his wits failed
him; there are so few grand things that
people can do in the hope of cheating oth
ers into the belief that they are working
for fun rather than necessitr. But soon
the old gentleman added—"l declare, I'm
A. FAMILY NEWSPAPER--DEVOTED TO LITERATURE, LOCAL AND GENERAL NEWS. ETC.
WAYNESBORO', FRANKLIN - COUNTY, PA., THURSDAY, OCTOBER 15, 1874.
afraid to go home, lest it had reached
your mother's ears!"
The proud woman soon heard of it,and
she talked angrily about what Mrs. Adam
and Mrs. Col. West, and purse-proud Mi2B
Allen would say, and she almost inclined
to think ififould be better to give Love
five hundred dollars than to be disgraced
in society,
"Love wouldn't talcO any money," re
plied the old man, whose attitude during
the-cenversation—was that of one-caught
out in a cutting hail-storm without any
umbrella.
"Dreadful independent fur any body
that's penniless," cried the old lady.
Love and her stout helper went to work
at once, and very soon the china closet,
and next. the neat little dining room,were
filled with glass jars through which tiny
green cucumbers and onions, and every
thing else nice in that line, was peeping,
or, as Love said, "smiling on the family."
The business went on bravely, and nj
one year Love's husband, who was partial
ly restored to health, forsook the bed and
took charge of it, and she went back to
the nursery, every good mother's place
when Providence doesft call her out of
it. •
This is no pretty fiction to teach young
folks that "where there's... — a will _there's-a
way." Ins a true story of a brave little
woman, and we can tell you the street
and number of a large store in a certain
city, far awaymhere her enterprising hus
band has built up a large buisness, and
made not a little money.
He says that if Love had never learn
ed to make pickles, or had been tor, proud
to make therir for others, in his dark time,
he should have been in his grave five years
ago.
Who thinks less of her for doing it ?
Life, like the leaf, has its fading. We
speak and think of it with sadness,just
as we think of the autumn season. But
there should be no sadness at the fading
of a life that has done well its work. If
we rejoice at the advent of a new life ; if
we welcome the coining of a new pilgrim
to the uncertainty of this world's way,
why should there 'be so much gloom when
all the uncertainties are past, and life at
its waning wears the glory of a comple
ted task ?- Beautiful as is childhood in
its freshness and innocence, its beauty is
that of untried life. It is the beauty of
promise, of spring, of the. bud. A holier
and rarer beauty is the beauty which the
warning of faith and duty wears.
It is this duty of a- thing completed ;
and as men come together to congratulate
each other when some great work has been
achieved, and see in its concluding noth
ing but gladnesss, so we feel when the set
ting sun flings back its beams upon a life
that has answered well its purpose. When
the bud drops are blighted and the mil
dew blasts the early green, and there goes
all hope of the harvest, one may well be
sad ; but when the ripening year sinks a
mid garniture of autumn flowers and
leaves, why should we regret or murmer ?
And so a life that is ready and waiting
for the '"well done" of God, whose latest
virtues are its noblest, should be given
back to God in uncomplaining reverence,
we rejoicing that earth is capable of so
much gladness, and is permitted so much
virtue.
FRESH AIR.-A neat, clean, fresh air
ed, sWeet, cheerful,well-arranged and Well
situated house exercises a moral as well
as physical influence over its inmates,
makes the members of a family peaceful
and considerate of the feeling and happi
ness of each other ; the connection is ob
vious between the state of mind thus pro
duced and habits of respect for others,
and for those higher du ties and obligations
which no law can enforce. On the con
trary, a squally, filthy, noxtious dwelling
rendered still more .wretched by its noi
some spite and in which none of the de
cencies of life can be observed, contributes
to make its unfortunate inhabitants sen
sual, and regardless of the feelings of
each other; the constant indulgence of
such fashions renders them reckless, bru
tal, and the tradition is natural to pro
pensities and habits incompatible with a
respect for the property of others, or for
the law.
THE OLD RED CENT.—As the old "red
cent" has now passed out of use, and, ex
cept rarely, out of sight, like the "old
oaken bucket," its history is a matter of
sufficient interest for preservation. The
cent was first proposed by Robert Morris,
the great financier of the Revolution, and
was named by Jefferson two years after.
It began to make its appearance from the
mint in 1792. It bore the head of Wash
ington on the one side and thirteen links
on the other. The French ideas in A
merica, which put on the head of the
Goddess of Liberty,—a French Liberty,
with reek thrust forward and flowing
lockp. The chain on the reverse was dis
placed by an olive wreath of peace, but
the French liberty was short lived, as was
her portrait on our cent. The next head
or figure that succeeded this—the staid,
classic dame, with a fillet -around
her hair—came into fashion about thirty
or forty years ago,and her finely chiselled
Grecian features have been but lighty al
tered by the lapse of time.
Vice causes 'many to waste the talents
given them by their Heavenly Father.
That dissolute and intemperate habits in
jure the body is well known; that they in
jure the miud is a fact as well established.
ThOusands of promising young men have
all their hopes blighted by allowing them
selves to become addicted to vices.
A negro insisted that his race was men
tioued in the Bible. He said he heard the
?reacher read about how "ffi,, ,, ger Dams
wanted to be born again."
Life's Autumn.
111' CIIIIMOODI MEL
BY E. NELSON.
My childhood's prayer! m y childhood's
prayer! -
'Tis ringing ever in mine ear,
With memories of sweet days that were
When earth_ was new and hope was dear ;
When not a Cloud, or sigh, or tear
Seemed traced within my horoscope_;
Nor bitter pang, nor burning fear— .
But all things whispered hope, sweet hope!
Alas ! there hath been sin and care
Between me and my childhood's prayer.
My childhood's prayer ! Oh, not one flower
But 'minds - me of its purity;
The lowliest daisy in the bower
Brings back the gentle prayer to me,
With all the joys of infancy :
I never Tok upon a star,
But that its radiance seems to be
A beacon from the days afar—
.A memory of joys,that were
All fleeting—but my childhood's prayer.
My childhood's prayer !--teach infant tone
Was lisped beside my mother's knee:'
Alas! my heart hath harder grown.
Beneath a chilling destiny ;
Yet never from my memory
Shall fade the beautiful, the true
--- S - Weit guardian of my infancy,
This heart still fondly clings to you ;
Each snowy thread, mid thy dark hair,
Reminds me of my childhood's prayer.
There have been hours of deep distress,
There have been years of grief and care,
There hath_been_etterwretchedness—
A darkness that could think no prayer ;
_
Yet; in the darkest days that were,
A gentle voice from by-gone years
Thrilled to the brink of black despair,
•And gave the sinner words and tears;
Yes, I have wept, and pleaded there,
• My childhood's prayer ! my childhood's
prayer !
THE SWEETNESS or Hoar.—He who
has no home has, not the sweetest pleasure
of life; he feels not the thousand endear
ments that cluster around that hallowed
spot to fill the void of this aching heart,
and while away his leisure moments in
the sweetest of life's joys. Is misfortune
your lot?—You will find a friendly wel
come from hearts beating true to your
own. The chosen partner of your toil has
a smile of approbation when others have
deserted, a hand of hope when all others
refuse, and a heart to fill your sorrows as
if they were her own. Perhaps a smiling
cherub, with prattling glee and joyous
laugh, will drive sorrow from ,your care
worn brow, and enclose in it the wreathes
of domestic bliss. No matter how humble
that home may be, how destitute its stores,
or bow, poorly its inmates are clad, if true
hearts dwell there it is yet a home. A
cheerful, prudent wife, obedient and af
fectionate children, will give their possess
ors more real joy than bags of gold and
worldy honors. The home of a temperate,
industrious, and honest man will be his
greatest joy. He comes to it weary and
worn, but the music of the merry laugh
and happy voices of the children cheer.
A. plain, but a healthy meal awaits him.
Envy, ambition, and Strife have no place
there, and with a clear conscience he lays
his weary limbs down to rest in the bosom
of his family, and under the protecting
care of the poor man's Friend.
THE LOST CHILD.—The whole country
has been aroused about the theft of Char
lie Ross from the home of his parents in
Germantown. -We see the picture of the
unfortunate lad in all the depots. Every
father and mother feels the thrill of that
dreadful story of crime and anguish. May
the great effort for his rescue be successful.
Rut there are villainous influences a
waiting around every door-step for the
taking off of our children. There are tens
of thousands of little ones being, as to
moral character, kidnapped in our cities.
Let parents be on the watch lest unclean
pictures and bad companionships doa de
structive work upon their families. If we
could appreciate the baleful work being
done upon the morals of the young, there
would be bell-men on every street, crying,
"A. lost child! a lost child! a lost child !"
What we want is more schools, better pa
rental discipline, more vigilant police,
more positive religious instruction, and
more prayer. Keep the children more a
round the home fireside, and less in the
alleys, the by-ways, and streets of a busy
city, where scoundrels can get hold of
them. We cannot be too careful of ,these
household treasures.—Christian at Work.
A. christian- man was dying in Scot
land. His daughter Nellie eat by his
bedside. 'lt was Sunday evening, and the
bell of the - Scotch kirk was ringing, call
ing the people to church. The good old
man, in his dying dream thought that he
was on his way to church in his sleigh a
cross the river; and as the eVening bell
struck up, in his dying dream he thought
it was the call "to church. He said; "
'Hark, children, the bells are ringing; we
shall be late ; we must make the mare
step out quick !" He shivered, and.then
said : "Pull the robe up closer my lass !
It is cold crossing the river, but wa will
soon be there ! And lie smiled and said :
"Just there now !" No wonder he smiled.
The good old man had gone to church.—
Not to the old Scotch kirk, but to the tem
ple in the skies. Just across the river.
Father Tayloy, a clergyman recently
located at Bishop Creek, California, was
'so impressed with a dream that the whole
Owens Valley country in that State would
soon be destroyed by earthquakes• and
floods, that he has sold out all his posses
sions and started for Arkansas. Before
leaving be publicly warned his congrega
tion of the impending danger, and ad
vised them to follow his example and de
part from the fated regions before it was
too late.
A Mustache.
By all means raiso one ! -
My young masculine friends,. if you have
hitherto neglected it, attend to it at once..
"Delays are dangerous." ',Procrastina
tion is the thief of time." Now-a-days,
to succeed in life, it is necessary that a
man should have a mustache ! Witness
the following adiertisement copied verba
tim from one of our city dailies:
"WANTED--A. young gentleman to act as
clerk in a dry goods store. Must be expe
rienced in the business, ofgood address and
prepossessing appearance. One with a,mus
tache preferred..
Brains, you ate, are at a discount, but
hair on the upper lip is at a premium.—
Everybody appreciates a mustache; but
few people have wit enough to appreci
ate brains, even whenthey come in the
- vicinity of them-which, by the way, is
not often.
A mustache makes itself evident at
once, unless it - be a pale
which requires the observer to use a mi
croscope murder to.be visible, and indica
tions of them are_not_always-surfaceAu_
&cations. •
Blonde mustaches are all the go with
novels. Tawny they are sometimes desig
nated, but. never red.
_Somehow,'low-a-dam-everybody seems=
to avoid correctness in everything, and it
would be dreadful to describe a. hero
with a red mustache. So, young man, if
you desire to be in style, raise a. tawny
mustache. Let it grow long, so that your
mouth will be submerged—so that nobody
will know for certain that you have gol
you e G
a mouth. It will teach lookers-on a le g ss.
on of faith in things-unseen.
Young ladies like mustaches. Of course
they do. A. hero with chin whiskers or
mutton chops would be nowhere. So,
young gentleman, go back to the first
principles, and raise one ! Oil it ; perfume
it ; comb it ; wax it ; curl it ; twist it ; twirl
it. If necessary /lye it, and on no account
stop stroking . it for if you do you will show
to the observing would that you are think
ing of something else, and what fashionable
young man ever forgets the existence of
his mustache?
Don't Do It.
Don't imagine that every "sound is a
delight.", A. sound whipping never de
lights the recipient.
Don't ruin your neighbor's reputation
to build up your own. A structure built
on ruins will not stand.
Don't make your boy "smoke" for a
slight offence. It is wrong to teach chil
dren bad habits.
Don't buy pools at a race track.—Bet
ting is immoral, especially when you bet
on the wrong horse.
Don't learn to "keep books." The man
who forgets to return a borrowed book is
worse than au infidel.
Don't respect a nian for his title only.
General loafers 'are sometimes excellent
judes of whisky
Don't dream that you can work inces
santly. The most vigorous • marksman
needs a rest.
Don't advocate the doctrine Of Chris
tian perfection. Give a man a right to
criticise his wife's millinery bills.
Don't forget to pay the printer. No
man can make a good impression without
money.
Don't attempt to punish all your ene
mies at once. , You can't do a large busi
ness with a small capital.
Don't say, "I told you so." Two to one
you never said a word about it.
Don't worry about anotliel' man's busi
ness. A little selfishness is sometimes con -
mendable.
Don't imagine that you cin correct all
the evils iu the world. A grain of sand
is not prominent in the d, s ft.
Don't mourn over fancied grievances
Bide your time, and real sorrows - will
come.
Don't borrow a coach to please your
wife. Better make her a little sulky.
Don't imagine that everything is weak
ening. Butter is still strong in this mar
ket.
Don't publish your acts of charity. The
Lord will keep all your accounts straight.
Don't linger where your "love lies dream
ing." Wake her up and tell her to get
breakfast.
Don't insult a poor man. His muscles
may be well developed.
Don't put on airs in your new clothing.
Remember that your tailor is suffering.
Don't stand still and point the way to
heaven. Spiritual guide boards save but
few sinners.
BAD LANGUAGE.—There is as much
connection between the words and the
thoughts es there is between the thoughts
and actions. The latter is only the' ex
pression of the the former, but they have
power to react upon the soul and leave
the stain of corruption there. A young
man who allows himself to use ono vulgar
or profane word, has not only shown that
there is a foul spot upon his mind, but by
the appearance of that one word he ex
tends that spot and ihflames it till, by in
dulgence it will pollute and rdin the soul.
Be careful of your words as of your
thoughts. If you can control the tongue
that no improper words are pronounced
by it, you will soon be able to control the
mind, and save it from corruption. You
extinguish the fire liysmothering it or pre
venting had thoughts bursting into lang
uage. Never utter a word anywhere which
you are ashamed to speak in the presence
of the refined female or,the most religious
man.
A Chicago reporter went to a party the
other day and was good enough to remark
the next morning that a certain young
lady had the smallest waist in the room.
There is no sense in gettii2g wrathful with
the young man ; the other girls killed bins
the next day; and they made him n grave
where the sunbeams rest.
Pig or Pup.
An old darkey was once sent by his
master with a covered basket to brag a
small pig from a neighbor's, 'Having de
posited it safely beneath the lid, he start
ed for home, stopping occasionally at the
groggeries that he passed to take a drink
and hear the news. Two mischievous
boys observed that the old man was
go
ing intoxicate d and they planned to have
some sport.
They procurod a puppy and at the
next stopping place, they secretly remov
ed the pig and, made an exchange.
On coming iput the old man lifted the
lid to see that ,all was right, and was a
mazed to find that in the place of his pig
he had a pup. -He studied . a moment, and
then took his new charge_along, shaking
his bead gravely. At the next stopping
place the pig was returned and the pup
triken out A_ ain , and when the old maa
in the basket to see ifthe
pup was safe, his amazement was again
doubled as hi recognized his pig once
At the nest stoppkg place another
transformation took place, and the mysti
fied darkey became at last utterly bewil
dered. • When he reached home, he threw
dOwn-the-basket-ia-disgust;esel , • '
'Dar he is I Take him quick fo' he's a
pttp agin. 'Bout half de time he's been
In an' half de time pup all da way from
the fust grocery.'
.During the progress of the trial of the
case of widow Mathews _against—the- Ele
vator Company, in the Circuit Court of
St. Louis, Col: Slayback, counsel for the
defendeut, conceived the idea that one
Murphy, a witness for the plaintiff;• was a
suitor for the hand of the widow, and on
the eve of leading her to the alter. Get
ting Murphy , on the stand, the lawyer en
deavored to bring this fact before the jury,
and this . , was the upshot of his effort.—
Mr. Murphy are you any relation to the
plaintiff?"
"No, sir, I am not."
"Don't you expect to be ?"
', -"Such a thing might happen."
"Now, are yougoing to marry her?"
"I'm afraid not."
"You are afraid you won't eh ? Well,
now don't you seipect to marry her ?"
"If my wife should die, and the widow
remain single till then, such h thing might
haPpen."
The jurors and spectators burst into
roars of laughter, and Murphy chuckled
at the cunning manner in which. he had
drawn the lawyer on. The colonel bad
nothing more to say on the matrimonial
question.
'STANDING FIRE.-A young soldier go
ing fo his barrackroom to sleep for the
fiist time, quietly kneeled down to pray
inithe presence of his comrades. This act
was the signal for a storm. Hisses, shouts
anti whistles filled the room with hideous
none. Belts were thrown at the kneeling
solOier, and one leaped upon the bed and
sholited in his ear. But he was unmoved
to the end of the prayer,-when he arose
and silently went to his repose. The next
night his comrades eagerly watched to
see if he would dare to pray a second
time. To their surprise be again dropp
ed on his knees and they saluted him with
thoqtame noises as on the pevions even
ing. He did not flinch, however. r The
third evening he kneeled down and pray
ed regardless of their continued mocking
and noise. On the fourth , evening the
noise was less. On the fifth it was still less,
and on the sixth_ one of the soldiers ex
claimed :
"He stands fire; he stands fire. He is
genuine."
After that no one disturbed him. He
had overcome opposition ; he had won re
spect.
TEE "GREAT CLOCK OF EiEKNITY."
—A Washington lecturer says that the
earth's orbit has been widening out for 20,-
000 years past, and will continue to do so
for 20,000 years to come. It will then be
gin to contract, and will continue to do so
for 50,000 years. The eccentricity of Mer
cury has been steadily increasing for the
last 100,000 years, but haa,nearly - attain
ed its limit. In about 5,000 years it will
begin to diminish and will continue to do
so for-more than 100,000. The orbits of
the planets' must go. on oscillating in this
manner as long as the laws of nature re-
Alain unchangedi t funning what a French
writer has called'treat clocks of eterni
ty. which beat Ages, as hours beat sea
ouds."
Many a wife goes down to her grave a
dulled and dispirited woman, simply , be
cause her good and faithful husband_ has
lived by her side without talking to her.
There have been days when one' word of
praise, or oue word of simple .good cheer
would have girded her with new strength.
Shedid not know, very likely, what she
needed, or that she needed anything ; but
she drooped. Many a child grows up a
hard, unimpressionable, unloving man or
woman, simply from the uncheered silence
in which the first ten years were pass'd.
Very few fathers and mothers perhaps, in
society, habitually talk with their OM,:
dren. It is certain that this is one of the
worst short-comings of our homes. -
WORKING CITEAP.—"What does Satan
pay you for swearing?" asked a man of a
swearing boy.
"Nothing," was the answer.
"Well," said the mau,- "you work cheap.
To lay off the character of a genthman,
to give so much pain to your friends and,
all civil ' folks, to wound conscience and
risk your soul, and, all :for nothing, you
certainly do work cheap - - mu cheap -in.
deed."
No man can rearj•about. all. these blitr
larks without a delerudriation to have his
wife 'deep on the front side of the bed.
$2,00 PER YEAR.
wit and Xitmor.
Now the Sultan of Turkey 'wishes' he
were dead.' Dr. Mary Walker is there.
He that knoweth knowledge spareth I
words; but a woman keepeth still one
when she cant help it.
41 40 1■••••----......
'Ai
A New York ,
oc or figures it out hat
an average woman ill skid a barrel of
tears in forty yea .
When he calls her 'ISly j9ggy,my puggy -. 1
my honey, my. cot* my decry, !xiy love, ,
my dove,' he's got it pretty bad.
The man who never told an editor
how he could bet4r his "we' 'has ' 4 gOnn
West' to marryphe. voman who never
lookei into the looking-glass.
The Louisville Courier-Journal hazards,
the assertion that the man who plants
shade tree is nobler than the founder of
fo - ur-base - MI c a 2.
. .
Mrs. Austin, of Alexandria Virginia,
has lived in one neighborhood thirty-eight
years, and. naver_borrowed_ber--nei,!hboes
irons or a cup o
We never stand by when a woman en
ters a hardware store, shuts her teeth to
gether, and inquires the price of "them
'ere iron-handled rolling-pins," without
feeling there - is rest beyond the grave for
her husband.
At the -latest accounts the young man
who -says "Septembah" was asking his
physician if it was safe to_ eat oysters.
In months which have no "r" in their
names.
A lady was examining an applicant
for the office of maid of-all work, when
she interrogated her as follows: WA:
Mary, can you scour tnwaro with alac,
rity ?" "No, ma'am, I always scour it
with sand."
/young man form the country going
into a shoe-shop for a pair of boots, tho
shop-men blandly asked, 'What number
do you wear.?'
'Why, two, of course, you fool !" ea
aimed the indignant countryman.
Tap,' observed a young urchin of tender
years, to his fond parent, 'dues God know.
everything?' 'Yes my son;' replied he, but
why you ask ?"Begauee our preach
er when heprays so long is telling him
everything, .I. thonght he 'was'uot posted!'
The Detroit Free Presa man has jusli#
returned from Saratoga. lle says: - 'this,
Saratoga belles merely taste food at the
table, but fee the waters to bring a square
meal up the back stairs."
`See,' said a sorrowing - wife., 'll - o-ut
peaceful the cat and dog are."Yes,'.said '
the petulant husband, •but tie thenaTio.; ;
gether and then sco how the fur will by 't
When a young lady notices your whir
button hanging single thread on 46
"ragged edge" o he button hole; ands
„ calls your attent n to it, don't wait for
another hint like that, haryou may never
get it.
Of all declarations of love, the most ad
mirable was that which a gentleman made
to a young lady Who asked him to she*
her the picture of the one sho loved,Whon
he immediately presented her with a mir
ror.
"Tho boy afthe head of the class - will
state What were the dark ages, of the
world." Boy-hesitates. "Next—nester
Smith, can't you tell what the .dark ages
were?" "I , guess they were the ages just
before the invention of spectacles." 4 .0.0
to youi seats," .
"In the "dark days" of '64 there liVed
"Down East" two we1l•to•do Dish neigh
bors, each of- whom had a f 306 who had
gone west - to seek their fortune& • The old
boys• meeting one. day, mutual inquiries
were made about the youngsters.
"Well, Put, how is Mickey making out.
wid his thrip out West?" _
"Illigantly: tin dollals a wake, and bog=
sin' himself. Ainihow's your boy gettin''
on, Dinnis?"
"Teddy, ye mane? He's doin' splendid,
the darlintl Why, his lasht tether was'
hustin' wid greenbacks. and so asy, too."
"And what's•he dohs'?"
"Faix, I-hardly know, but it's in the
government imploy. he is." -
"The divil ye say! the , government!
'What's he doin' for the government?"
"Faix, I hardly.know what it is, but I
think it's what he calls Inapite the bona- •
ty !"
A SHARP Bov.-=Preddy Warner is a.
child of some five summers' growth, and
his-mother, like all g9od mother:, never
lets sli p an opportune, to impress 'Ton
her offspring's mind 'some good practical
or moral lesson-.
She had giyen little Freddy - a fine apple
and said to him:
"Now, Freddy, you must give half of
the apple to your brother G - dorgy, and
when you divide anything with ano:her
person, you must always be sure to give
the other porsou the larger half."
"Yes, mamma, " replied the little, phi
losopher, looking sharply at the big apple '
in his hand, then suddenly looking up iht
to his mother's fano, ho added : "Dear'
mamma you take the apple - andzgi44 to .
Deomy,.and let binidiiido 157-W4 . 4"4r 4 :'
. , ...,
(_. _ .... Eight Conneetictit..yOutigfiadiblitttr.cl:.
just taken the veil. liey„were:
~0 .
yfc ekled. r - - - . 2 *- . .'..z:. - •-ic:- .
7 ); ,v .
' - .;-'-'lle minister-Of:Alai ir .c. F` ' - --- - t;
Mouth. -
1 ..ri......„,:,
NUMBER 17.
. ~~p..',`'i