YYi • • " f,; 4 ' : H•;: .• • . • • .• • • . . BY W. SLAM,. pottrg. II ! IVRY SHOULD TSB SPIRIT OF MORTAL BB PROUD ? [The following verses written by a Scotch Clergynian, William Knox; who died in 1825, aged 56, have often been quoted and widely treasured. They were tin especial favorite with the late President Lincoln, who used to recite them to .his intimate friends.] Oh! why should the spirtt ofmortal be proud? Like a swift meteor, or ,a fast flying cloud, A flash of lightning, a break,of the wave, Ho passeth from life to his rest in. he grave The leaves of the oak and willow shallfade , Bo scattered around and together be ; And the young and ,the old, and the low and the high, Shall moulder to dust, together shall lie. • The infant and another, attended and loved; • The mother that infant's *affection who • proved ; The husband, that mother and infant who blessed, test. • The hand of the lking the sceptre ,bath --- b - o - rne ; , The brow of the priest that the:mitre.hath The eye of the sage and thelleart of the brave. Are hidden and:lost in the depths ef- the grave. The peasant, 11 reap ; The Marini - lan who cli up the steep ; The beggar, who wandered in search ()ibis Have faded away like • the grass,we So the multitude goes, _like the flowers or the weed, That withers away to let others succeed ; ; So the multitude comes, even those .we To repeat every tale that has , often !been :told. For we are the same our fathers have been; We see the same sights our father have seen; We drink the same stream, and view the same sun, And run the o.me course• otti fathers ,hove The thoughts•we are thinking • our fathers would think From the death we are shrinking our fa- FM& ther;s•would shrink; To the life we are clinging they also would cling; But it speeds from i us all, like, a bird.oa the wing. They loved, but the story we cannot un fold; They scorned, but:the heart of the haughty is cold ; They grieved, but,no wail from their slurn her will come; They joyed; but the tongue of their glad ness is • dumb ; They die, aye! they died; we things that are now, That walk on the turf that lies over their brow, And make in the Swellings a transient a bode, Meet the things that they met on their pil grimage road. Yes! hope and despondency, pleasure and pain, We mingle together in sunshine and rain ; And the smile and the tear, and the song and the dirge, Still follow each :other, like surge upon - 'Tis the wink of an eye; 'tis the drauglt of a breath, From the blossom of health to the paleness of death, From the gilded saloon to the bier and the shroud; .Oh! why should the spirit of mortal be proud. gtl isrtilautous grading. ANININERISARiY SERMDN, PREACHED IN TRINITY REFORMED CHURCH, SUNDAY EVENING, JULY 7TH BY REV. EL H. W. BIB3HHAN. "I am not ashamed of thogospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to er cry one that betieveth." BOlri. 1: 16. Three years of ministerial labor in your midst have !gone, and this evening we stand, as it were, upon the threshold of the fourth. And as we retrospect the past three years it is with no little degree .of confidence to declare that thegospel was preached to you without adulteration.— Not a single doctrinal statement has been made we would not make again. If we have regrets in regard to any doctrinal statement it is, that we did t►ot declare the same with greater deliberation, great er earnestness and greater emphasis, Ths gospel preached you is as old ns the history of the fall of Adam and Eve, It is the (same which God, out of love, first published in Eden. The truths pre sented for your acceptance are as titer- nal as God himself. Only as God could Jesus say : "I am the truth." At no time had we misgivings that the gospel we preached was, perhaps, after all not the gospel, and the doctrinal state ments made, perhaps, after all not cor rect. No ; not for a moment did we ever doubt. To doubt would be sinful. ' During the three years of labor among you we have not been in search of the truth. They were not years, during which we were tossed to and fro hoping to find a resting-place for our souls.— We have the truth. Our foundation is laid, and as this foundation is a solid, e ternal Rock so we have remained unsha ken, unwavering in our heart-felt convic tions and in our theological position. It is the foundation of the Apostles and the Prophets, Jesus Christ himself being the chief corner 'stone. Why should we be shaken? There is no reason. "For oth er foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is JESUS CHRIST." As we enter upon the fourth year, as pastor and people, I am more !determined than ever to preach to you the good, old Gospel: to publish to a dying and perishing world salvation by Jesus Christ. Yes, as much as in me is, "I am ready to preach the .gospel ; for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth."— And prominent will I make the doctrine of justification by faith. If the bold and emphatic declaration of "the great cardin al doctrine of justification by faith alone, th ro u - gh - thel MI% tatibir - Of faction, righteousness and holiness, in op position to the idea of all merit on the part-of the believer himself," is an hereti cal sentiment then I wish to die with it on my lips, if it so please God. For, ,if we cannot stand by that, then that which we have received as the word of God is a most wonderful myth, and the hope of the civilized world "a doting dream."— But the word of God is no myth, and -the-hope-of-the-christianized-race - no dot ing dream. The sinner_ destitute of the glorious ar- o sow an th hi~g a 1& ray o rig u eousness an o mess, e orm-. ed in every part of his constitution, sub 'ect to a world of miser a creature of ignorance, of vanity, of poverty and cor ruption, isatgain through the sovereign grace and mercy ,of God received into Divine favor, by nnion,with Christ through faith. "God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoso ever believeth in hiin should not perish but have everlasting life, Jo. 3 : 16. Who would be ashamed of this gospel? I. We remark, in the first place, we are not ashamed of this gospel because, It is not of human origin. Man could not originate such a scheme as the Gos pel for the benefit of a sinful, guilty race. Such .excellencies as are found in the Gospel could only emanate from the bo som of the Eternal Wisdom—the Mighty God, the Everlasting King. The way proposed by the, Gospel to save sinful man never could have entered into the mind of man. The very idea was foolish ness to the intellectual Greek, and most offensive to the proud and haughty Jew many years ago, even as it is foolishness and -a stumbling block to many in the 19th century. It is true, the mind of man is natural ly endued with some knowledge of a Su preme Being who is to be feared, whose justice is to be satisfied for offence given to His most high majesty, and whose wrath is to be appeased in order to regain his favor. It is true, man always had a sense of religion ; he always had ambi tion to invent and to contrive ways and schemes to obtain true religious comfort —happiness. But man always failed.— There never was a race that did not set up shrines to worship a god. The most benighted, most groveling and most de graded of the race never thought of be ing without a god.and some mode of wor ship. But no man, no family, no school of men, no nation in any age of the world has invented anything for the world by which to elevate man into his original state of felicity lost through sin. No scheme of religion was ever devised by which the soul could again -be transform ed into the image or likeness of God.— Men dreamed of immortality, but had nothing definite and positive to give on the subject. The effort or endeavor on the part.of man to worship God, to be benefited and enjoy true happiness, both for time and eternity has ever been the figment of sin-bewildered brains. Paul speaking of such says",: "Professing them selves to be wise, ,they became fools" "vain in their imaginations." The gospel is not of man. No man men lay claim to it as their invention.— It is not of human origin. It is Divne God is the author of it. The Infiir Mind proposed and presented it to ti world lying in ruins and sunk into de, radation. To be ashamed of the Gospel is to ashamed of Christ, of His lowly birth, His poverty, of His ordinances. of followers who adhere to Him by- fail worshiping the Father in spirit and truth. Just as people become ashann of the Gospel they become conceited, - sumptous, proud, puffed up, without ural affection, truce breakers, false au sers, despisers of those that are good, tors, heady, high minded, lovers of ph. ure more than lovers of God, having form of godliness, but denying the pom thereof. `Jesus! and shall it over be, A mortal man ashamed of thee? Ashamed of Thee, whom angels praise 'Whose glory shines through endless days: "Ashamed of Jesus ! Just as soon Let midnight he ashamed of noon : 'Tis midnight with my soul till he, Bright Morning Star ! bid darkness flee." "Ashamed of Jesus! that dear friend, On whom my hopes of heav'n depend, No ; when I blush—be this my shame That I.no more revere his name." 11. We arc not ashamed, in the see • W - •. t • • VO TO 4 1 #1 1 ; VI; #C: >#o l ; and place because, It is of suck wonderful import for the race. Nothing is of great er significance. •Of so ,much moment was it regarded among the celestial host that when the eternal and only begotten Son of God appeared, as a poor child in the flesh, in the obscure town Bethlehem- Ephratah, a corps of them left the region of glory to sing the sublimest chorus ever heard in the earth : "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good-will to wards men," . Lu. 2 : 14. The manger-cradle became the great centre around which both human and heavenly beings revolved, acknowledging the heaven-born fact, salvation by and through the Seed of the woman, by the profoundest acts of worship of which ra tional beings are capable. It was regard ed of great importin the very. beginmg Elizabeth, Mary and Zacheriahs, through an irresistable inspiration sang psalms of joy and gladness. The shepherds on the plains of Bethlehem by direction from the shinino• b courts of heaven, and the wise men from the East, through the bright, heaven-appointed, guiding star were led to the shrine of the infant King and Savior to adore and worship What an acknowledgment of the import of the Gospel ! What is the incarnation of the Son of God-? It is the gospel unwrit ten. The great mystery of salvation not yet unfolded and fully accomplished. __ _ Moses - was fOr are to . r the Germans. Calvin for the French. La timer for the English. Zwinglius for the Swiss,-Knox-for-the Seots.—Washington for the Americans. Yes, these are great historic men. Men of blessed memory, for their nations. But the Gospel, the on of God in the flesh, doing and suffering for the human family is of universal im port. He is not Jesus the Christ for one race, or nation, or age, but for the whole of-mankind. The great Luminary, in the midst of a world of sin and darkness toward which the eye of faith was:turned by lie people cif - God, prospectively, for 4000 years, and toward which the eye of faith by the people - of God has ' ed, retrospectively, for more than 1800 years. The Lord Jesus is . the link to bind man back to his God and Maker.— This is the import of.the Gospel. 111. We are nut ashamed, in the third place, of.the Gospel because, In it is revealed that which, it is necessary to know to live and to die happy. For us the Gospel-record is not a dead letter. It is an instrument of writing differing from every other. That which God, as the E ternal Spirit declared in Eden to our first parents—that which He published by Patriarchs and Prophets,-that which He was pleased to represent by rites and ceremonies and finally fully accom plished by His only begotten Son in the flesh, He carefully and correctly record ed for our benefit. Men wrote as they were directed by the Holy Ghost. The Apostles had the mind of Clrist. "The spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things of God. Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the spirit which is of God ; that we might know the things that are freely given to us of God.— Which things also we speak, not in the words which man's wisdom teacheth, but which the Holy Ghost teacheth," I. Cor. 2: 10-13. "All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness," II Tim. 3 : 16. The words are spirit and life. The Gospel is the great theological text-book for us all, intended to be such especially for the Church. For all who can read or spell. It is God's directory. Such by the most emphatic command: "Search the Scriptures," "Prove all things ; hold fast to that which is good." It is not a sealed volume, because sacred. Not committed solely to the clergy, but to the whole Church. Yes, by, it God our Mighty Savior still' preaches to a perish ing world : incites men to come to Him as a loving Father; dedlares directly to every one who will peruse its sacred pag es what He requires of men, what they shall believe and what they shall do.— We are not ashamed of the Gospel as a written record, but glory iu it, because it is "as free as• the light of the sun, or the vital air, to all mankind." The same doctrine which the Son of God revealed to Adam and Eve in Para dise the traditions of men and the uninspired pages of history alongside ofit ! We accept no traditions, no commandments of men, no 'decisions of councils, composed of fel lable men as of equal authority with the scriptures, as the rule of, our faith and practice. Whatever comes in conflict with the teachings of the word of God we ignore. -• - But is not the combined wisdom .of a synod or council superior to the mere win dow of a single individual.. Yes ; this we accede readily. But the combined wis dom of a synod or council is not equal by any means to the wisdom of God, and no declaration of the most learned Synod or Council can make plainer how the sinner is saved, and saved only, than God made it plain.in the Gospel. He tells us that "the way of salvation" is "through faith in Jesus Christ." And if for this decla ration a man were cast into dungeon to rot, or burned at the stake, it would still remain the same unalterable truth. Just as the world kept on moving, though Ga'.- ileo was cast into prison for asserting it, so - it will remain ferver true that by grace we are saved through faith—that by faith only we are united to Christ Jesus as Sa vior, though the most learned of the earth would pronounce against it. IV._ We are not ashamed, in the fourth place, of the Gospel , because, "it is the pow- T' of God unto salvation to every one that be- Tiv — ariliteriTiii:idering of -. lre would be, it is God's power. Not merely strength in the Gospel,but an effective pow which Men sunk into the mire of sin and death are lifted up ; by which they are brought from filth and degradation to stand before God, clothed in the righte ousness of Christ Jesus. Wonderful pow er !Ylt opens the eyes of soul. It illuminates•the darkened under standing. It quickens the soul into new ife. It turns the stony heart into a heart of flesh. It transforms the vile, prnfligatf foul-hearted sinner into an humlAe, pray-: ing and praising child of God. It is a o ver _ eater than sin eater than death greater than hell. It brings hundreds, tens of thousands from the kingtlom of darkness into the kingdom of light. It begets hope of eternal' life in the soul. 'it makes God's service a pleasure. It bears us up under the most trying circumstan ceS, as adopted children of God. Yes, it is God's power. Not however in the sense of inexorable impulse, depriving men of their freedom, but still God's power to every one of the race. Notice the condi tion. It is God's power to every one that believeth. Faith, oh note it 1 faith is "the apprehending and appropriating organ." Paul says not : to every one who is eh cumsised, or baptized, or obeys the law, but, to every one that.believeth." We are not ashamed of this Gospel.— No, it is God's power— the seed of life.— There is nothing like it iu all the world. "It is quick and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercinn , even to the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart," Heb. 4: 12. This Gospel we will continue to preach. Nothing else.- , - It is God's power. nave is no power in any other kind of preaching. Men may preach to you moral excellences, or the punctual discharge of relative duties, or the diligent use of ordinances, or philoso phical dogmas of theology, but that is not preaching the Gospel, not one of them, or all combined constitute the christian foun dation, hence there is no power in the preaching of them. God did not. ordain them as His power. They are lawful and scriptural in their place, anda proper" use of them a benefit. But the whole Gos pel is God's power. The Rock is Christ. Christ is the all and in all for the sinner. The Gospel is salvation by Christ. God's power to every one that believeth. "The salvation of Christ is applied by faith, without which God will neither justify nor save any man, because it is the ap pointed means of his people's union with Jesus Christ." _ ant ready to preach grOospel to you.— For lam not ashamed iof the Gospel : for it is God's power unto salvation to every one that believeth." RACE FOR A WIDOW.-A correspondent writes to the Mankato (Minn.) Union of a widow who resides in a certain town in Winona county who had been wooing two young stripplings, the one ten and the other eleven years her junior. Both the lads happened to meet the lady at the same time, and both were on the errand of de ciding upon the day for celebrating the nuptals, as each had the encouragment to believe himself the favored suitor. The widow herself was undetermined, and a scene of tears gave a momentary relief to the heart-throbbings of the two young lovers. Finally she chose the younger of the two, and they parted for the night.— In the morning the discarded lover be thought himself of his photograph and ring, still in the possession of the lady.— He went to the lady to obtain them and :ain sought favor in her eyes. She yield f, and promised if he should get, his li cense first she would marry hire. He left on the afternoon train for Winona to pro cure the license, and noticed his rival on board, who was on the same errand, but evidently knew nothing of the new bar gain. ;As soon asthe train arrived the lover who held the latest promise rushed for the clerk's office and obtained his li cense, and just as he was retiring the ri val entered and applied for a license to marry the same woman. Our hero who had obtained the license was . bound to press his advantage, and instead of wait ing for the morning train, which would bear his arrival home, ho footed it home through the mud the same night, and se. cured his prize the next morning by wars rying her. • Do the best you can. - en Gos ROHL 0 What holy raptures cluster round That cherished littre word! What sacred music in the sound! Our very souls are stired. Home is the place where kindred minds Hold converse pure and sweet : Affection binds, with silken thread, The hearts of those who meet. Here pei.fect peace and happiness On fairest pinion poise ; For, oh! we have full sympathy In all our woes and joys. Home is the pilgrim's guiding-star, The seaman's heavenly light ! To every one, in every clime, • A Pisgah of delight. My home ! my home so very dear a Thou halcyon-spot of rest— Pd linger at - thy chtistal fount, And be supremely blest. -4" Thou boundiess sea of heavenly bliss - Unfathomed here below; The depth of life and light and love, Eternity will show. [Published by Request • ---- School-Rouses.— As the season has arrived when School Directors erect school houses,l think that it is of the utmost importance to call their attention to the o owing facts : The school house and grounds do just as much in the education of youth as do other agen cies. The comfort of the house has much to do with success or failure in attaining -a-high-degree-in-culture the house—whether it sten& in a - basin or on an elevation, overlooking a great slope of country—is a. consideration not to be overlooked when a site is selected. A. farmer of ong experience—every thing else being equal—knows more of agriculture than he who has seldom or •• • .- - i itrm7-A-meehanie-Imow • more about machinery—everything else being-equal—than--a-clerk-who-never--was in a machine shop. Merchants know the • price and the quality of goods better than farmers do. An expert artizan, painting for years, can detect errors on a picture, in the distribution of colors on a house, far better than he who has been entirely devoted to dealing in cattle. An engi neer, who has studied the power of steam, and for years used its forces, is a better judge of a good engine, or of a defective ; one, than the merchant who has traveled thousands of miles byrail,never inquiring into the causes that move the driving wheel. An old practitioner knows more about disease, the causes of them,the rem edies, how and when to apply them, than do lawyers, ministers, farmers, painters, pedagogues, engineers, mechincs, Ed ucators, teachers, and men who have .sought a kinewledge of the different kinds of instruments used in training the heart, the head, and the hand, who have by • reading good authors, studied the excel lencies and the blunders of others, • who have become habitual observers of the en tire catalogue of school instruments, rea -1 son wouldteach us, yea common sense would declare, are the men who should be consulted when a school house is to be moved, or a new one built. Where the interest of the rising gener ation, where the interest of the nation are respected, where self-esteem has not made "a man wise in his own conceit," there men deficient in a knowledge of the wants and remedies of education, will consult 'members of the profession. Churches, depots, machine-shops, jails, court-houses, pig-pens, Gams, and almost anything, ex cept school-houses, receive a respectable length of time and deliberation to arrive at good plans. These are all of far less importance than the peoples' colleges. One or two acres a g round pleasantly located (if they do cost a trifle more than custom has paid for them formerly)should belong to every country and village school house. Space permitting we could prove it. Next a house should be erected with its sides much longer than the ends, many large windows in the sides, none in the ends, ceilings high to give sufficient vol ume of pure atmosphere, cellar under the whole house for wood and coal, and for play house ; heateis in the cellar, patent school desks, and everything in that line, sufficient to accommodate all pupils; book cas ia: ; )r the library and mineral ogical specrffens, and black-boards all a round the school-room. For further information we refer you to the Pennsylvania School Architect, by Dr. Burrows ; it is in the hands of Sec retaries of every School Board in Penn sylvania. School Economy, by J. P. Wick ersham, Superintendent of Common Schools, at Harrisburg, Pa. You cannot make the school property too pleasant. Don't build any more of those desolate prisons, on those desert like spots. Don't thus express to children that they are your inferiors, on an equality with brutes that have no idea of beauty and comfort. Don't make them wishthat their school-house were as pretty and .as pleasantly located as an adjacent barn.— Look before you leap, for great may be your injuries. Now AND MEN. If some of our nice young men could be purchased at their value as estimated by the public, and sold at their own estimate of themselves, the net profit of the trans action would pay the National debt twice over. Two Irishmen once saw a red headed wood pecker picking away at an old stump. .Iklarther, Jemy !' exclaimed one of his compatriots, 'just look at your bur-red; he has hammered his head till irs all blaydiu TEARS. —What would we do, we mourn ers and sufferers in this great battle-field of the world, weredt not for tears? . They are the messengers which come from the unknown Comforter, to keen our hearts from breaking, to save the soul from mad ness and despair, to clear away the'clouds that hung above us, and let the radience of God's promise in to show us that Ho has not forsaken us ! "I pitied her so," said some one who had beheld a mourner. "She wept as though her heart would break I" "She wept to save her heart from break ing," I said. "Every tear was a blessing, sent from Heaven direct—a surer comfort than a thousand, offered sympathies." • Once I was in a temple of music, and a grand organ, stirred by a master hand, was sending forth floods of rare melody. Just before me there was an old man, with withered cheeks and silver hair, and with marks of a hard existence traced in indel ible lines upon his aged fface. And as I looked I saw the tears falling, and I knew that, could the gifted artist have seen them he would have deemed them the highest tribute to his genius - that could have been offered. All the noisy bursts of applause that followed would have sank into nothing ness before the simple, touching offering of that old man's tears. To-day I watched a crowd of children at`plarbefore my peculiar to themselves, they wran gled over a baking of mud pies : "You id I" "I ?" "You shall !" And then , with a great uproar, the affair ended. I looked closer, and lo I the bevy of dis putants had quitted the field, and there was left just one little fat dumpling of a buyTin - his:first - bootsTand-he-was sitting among the bones of contention—the mud pies-and tears were trickling like rain o ver his dirty face, leaving little pale than : -le-there-to-mark-their-course. In those tears laid the end of all the trouble. "„It is an al ril shower," I said to in self; bnd for a momen urne I away, wishing that all our griefs might thus eas ry - dissolve themselves. When I looked again, I saw a pair of tiny legs making their way down the street, and I caught a glimpseof a sunny face, from which those tears had washed every trace of sorrow. Oh ye team ! Tears of sorrow that save the soul !Tears of pity that glorify the eyes that shed them'! Team of joy that holds the gates of Heaven ajar, and let us for a brief season feel its perfectness! Ye .are among the best of God's gifts to us, who live and toil, mourn anu suffer, with in this vineyard. When they come, whether as a sweet relief to breaking hearts, whether as a tribute to a deserving genius, or a happy ending of a mud-pie battle, they are bless ings Heaven-born ; and we have all of us drawn nearer to the Eternal, and beheld more of its comforts through mists of bit ter team than through years of smiles and sunshine. Notes on Health. The Norwalk Gazette says : A friend of ours who suffered horrible pains from neugralgia, hearing of a noted physician in Germany who invariably cured that disease, crossed the ocean, and visited Germany for treatment. He was 'perma nently cured after a short sojourn, and the doctor freely gave him the simple remedy used, which was nothing but a poultice and tea made from the common field thistle. The leaves pounded and used on the parts afflicted as a poultice, while a small quantity of the leaves are boiled down to the proportion of a quart to a pint, and taken in doses of a small wineglassful three times a day. In thou sands of cases it has never been a fbilure." An exchange gives the following rem edy for Nasal Catarrh : "Make a weak brine, and snuff it up the nostrils, and let it run down in the throat ; also yet the head with the same. If persisted in a sufficient length of time, it will effectual ly cure nasal catarrh. It is said by a physician that the various mixtures sold as "Catarrh Remedies, " " in many cases, are only salt disguised so as not to be known. Wetting the head with salt and water will stop the hair falling out." If we would establish the habit of drik ing water freely. in the morning, soon af ter rising, commencing with small . quan tities, increasing gradually as we learn to relish it, until the chief portion taken during the day is before breakfast, it will promote the health to a much greater extent than it ordinarily does, eradicat ing disease from the system, and become a most decided luxury in time. Especi ally is it recommended fur constipation or costiveness. A medical man who has examined the subject, declares that one-1i lf the children and one-quarter the adults who have ta ken I.ow'or malignant fevers, have been brought down by eating veal. There is enough poison in every pound of one week old veal, to kill a child fbur years of age. Wdls' Science of Health says that few persons can, after retiring, bieath deeply and slowly and count one hundred, three numbers to the breath, without going to sleep. A negro witness, on a horse trial in New Jersey court, was asked to explain the difference between a box , jtall and a common stall. Straightening himself up, he pointed to the square enclosure in which the judge was seated, and said, "Dat ar's what I call a box stall dere whar dat old hors is sittire 17 It took a good many raps ofthe judge's gavel to restore order in that court. Whoeve,r has hold of One link in the chain of trufh,has hold of an endless clue. Work is the weapon of honor. $2,00 PER YEAR Rti t and Nantor. - . trni, ere is really a delightful refreshing sight on this earth, it is a newly married ir k.. .sliding home with his first, washboard. r A Troy Dutchman, in tryino• b to reach the ferry boat, fell into the water. His first exclaination on being hauled out was, `Mine Gott, let's have a bridge !' 6 4O-0- ypt vedder vill it be to-day?' asked a .Q • avan of his neighbor. don't know; vat you tink? '1 tink it will be 's-elder as you tink."Vell, I tink so too.' L We see a patent "sparker" noticed.— A. man who can't do his own sparking without the help of machinery ought to be gobbled up by a widow irith nine small children. r \te r e A l . fashionable lady droPped one of her eyebrows in the church pew, -mod dread= fully frightened a:young Atunpnext to her, w o thought it was his mimistache. A Dutch justice gives the following oath to a witness : 'You do awfully swore dat you vill tell do trute, de whole - trute and nodings but de trute the best vat you can't. Josh Billing says in his `Letter :"Rats originallyttunefromNotway;and - tiobar would have cared if they had originally staid there.' A lady freind remarks that they_still Rhow theirgnaw-away origin.• Our friends-whose eyesight was not good, was recommended to try glasses.— He says he went and took fimr at 'the near est drinking saloons, and the result was -so-much-improved-that-he-could--see eslile. An old Scotch lady had an evening • ere-a-young-rnan-ww-present who was about to 'leave for an appoint ment in China. As he was exceedingly extravagant in his conversation about • • ;az , , , "• •• • enive wag leaving, 'Tak' good care o' yourself when ye areawa', for, mind ye, they eat pup pies in China.' A few days ago a couple of Boston run ners entered a restaurant in Portland and ordered dinner. One was pleased to or der a plate of baked beans. When ho came to settle he asked the price, and was informed that forty cents would be satis factory. The runner vas astounded, and exclaimed, "Isn't that a h—l of a price for beans ?" The man of grub got mad, and said that was the price, and that it must be paid. The runner re-uttered the same pious exclamation of astonishment several times, and paid the bill. On go ing out of the door he turned and yelled it again, but the bean man was riknt.— The next day the restaurant keeper re ceived a dispach and paid the telegraph boy forty cents. Judge, if you can, of his utter disgust when upon opening it he read, "Isn't that a h—l of a price for beans ?" THE VALLEY OF DEATu.—The Valley of Death, a spot almost as terrible as the prophet's valley of dry bones, lies just north of the old Mormon road to Califor nia—a region thirty miles long by thirty broad, and surrounded, except at two points. by inaccessible mountains. It is totally devoid of water and vegetation, and the shadow of a bird or wild beast never darkens its white glaring sands. The Kansas Pacific Railroad engineers discovered it, and also some papers which show the fate of the lost Montgomery train, which came South from Salt Lake in 1850; guided by a mormon. When near death's valley, some came.to the con clusion that the Mormons knew nothing a bout the country, so they appointed a leader and broke off' from the party. The leader traveled due west three days, and then descended into the broad valley, whose treacherous mirage promised water. Around the valley they wandered, and one by one the men died. The children, crying for water, died at their mother's breasts, and with swollen tongues and burning vitals the mothers soon followed After a week's wandering a dozen survi vors found some water. It lasted but a short time, when all perrished but two, who escaped out of the valley and follow ed the' trail of their former companions. Even now the wagons stand, and the shriv eled skeletons lie side by side. THE "BEST CURE."—Exercise can kill as well as cure. To be 'taking advanta geously, it should be done with judgment. Sometimes a particular part of the - body needs exercise, but the whole body is too weak to give it; in such a case only the part needing it should have it. But there is no rule which is applicable to all—nev er go against the instincts. Many per sons have hurried themselves into the grave by endeavoring to "keep pp" when they ought to be abed ; and they do "keep up," too, for so long a time that when they. do take their beds, their strength is so completely exhausted, that the systeny, has no power to rise, and they fall into a typhoid condition, and all is lost. When anything serious is the matter with do mestic animals, they court quietude and-„ perfect rest. Sometimes we feel indiqpo* . ed to exercise from sheer hiziness ;. in ill loose conditions of the bowls, debility t ain instinctive desire to sit doWn and stay. there is universal ; in most of such cases quietude is a cure. But there is one safe rule for all under all circumstances ; if every step you take is with an eilbrt, do not take another ; go to bed ; if you feel Cie better for a walk, then walk on ; but stop short of great fatigue. The road of ambition is too narrow-for friendship.
Significant historical Pennsylvania newspapers