The Waynesboro' village record. (Waynesboro', Pa.) 1871-1900, January 18, 1872, Image 1
. , _ . . , . + . - • . C IL) t.:.,5._ .• it. ..,..,i.„,,,.... , . . . •:•.,,,., ~i,,,,,,.•, i' , 11'.. : •• , . . ~ . . . . . . . . . 6,,,,,, ~,. ...,:. ~•.:4., ~‘ , . •,...:„. , H.:, ,,..:.... . t..• r . , . . .. , ... , , I A i• -, . . . . . .• . . . ~ ... . , . . . ..4 . . . . . . . , - . ~•. .... , . .. g - - .ittly4 a ~•„.440,,, , If Airv...u..... ~ ..i..:::. .....) . . , . . . • '''' ' ~,';, ~,,, 41: :• - .... : , --' ; . .. . .•• , _ , • -' `• '.. " !" _.„...- - .., ~-• • , 7 , . , 7...0 ~ •• . , . . . . . ' . , . .. • _ .... , - . .. ... _ .. .. . . . . . . . ,_ .. ... . _ . BY W. BLAIR. VOLUME 24. tRE WAYNESBORO' VILLAGE RECORD PUBLISHED EVERY TrnmSDAY MORNING By. W. BLAIR. • TERMS—Two Dollars per Annum if paid within the year; Two Dollars and • Fifty cents after the expiration of the year. VERTISEMENTS--One Square (10 lines) three insertions, $1,50; for each subsequent insertion, Thir live Cents per Square. A liberal discount made to yearly adver- LOCALS.—Business Locals Ten Cents per line for the first insertion, Seven Cents for subsea uent insertions. Vrofe s fisional lards. J. B. AMBERSON, M. D., PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON; • WAYNESBORO', PA. Office at the Wa_nesboro'_"Curner Drug - 6 to-r." B. 8., _A_ N .- , Has resumed the practice of Medicine. OFPICE—In the Walker Building—near - The Bowden House. Night calls should be 'made at his residence on Main Street, ad joining the Western School House. July 20-tf I. N. SNI - STMT_CY, 1/1" D., PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON. WAYNESBORO' PA. Office at his residence, nearly opposite the Bowden House. Nov 2—tf. 'JOHN A. H.YSSON' ATTORNEY AT LAW, H AVING been admited to Pray at the several Courts in Frank. ty, all business entrusted to his ea) promptly attended to. Post .Offie( Iderce rsburg, Pa. LEW W. DE' TBI ATTORNEY AT LAW, WAYNESBORO', P'A - Will give prompt and close atten business entrusted to his care. 0 door to the Bowden House, in th ..70_ A. STOUFFER, DENT/ST, - GREENCASTLE, P. . . '''''•'-';`. ,41, ,'.4 ? tl/4 • V1 . 04 4-.4 Experienced in Dentistry, will insert you sets of Teeth at prices to suit the times. Feb. 16, 1871. DEC, li,, it,. STRIVILLERI„ (Mummify OF Munctusnuno, PA.,) OFFERS his Professional - .services to the citizens of Waynesboro' and vicinity. Da. STRICKLER has relinquished an exten sive practice at Mercersburg, 1 ". been . prominently engaged fork , years in the practice of his profession. He has opened an Office in Waynesboro', at the residence of George Besore, Esq., ais Father-in-law, where he can be found at 1 times when not professionally engaged. July 20, 1871.-tf. A. K. BRANISHOLTS - , RESIDENT DENTIS - - WAYNESBORO', PA., Can be found at all times at his office where he is prepared. to insert teeth on the best basis in use and at prices to suit the times. eeth extracted, without pain by the use of ntoroforra, eather, nitrous oxid egas or the Ireezing process, in a manner surpassed by none. We the undersigned being acquainted with A.,K. Branisholts for the past year, an rec ommend him to the public generally to be a Dentist well qualified to perform all ope rations belonging to Dentistry in the most skillful manner. Drs. J. B. AMBERSON, I. N. SNIVELY, E. A. HERRING, J. M. RIPPLE, J. J. OELLIG, A..S.BONBRAKE, T. D. FRENCH. sept 29tfl c. _A.. S. wozF, DEALER IN - FA Z EL" SAND 'IL' WE LEY : , 883 WEST BALTIMORE STREET, BALTIMORE, MD. ter - Watches Repaired and Warranted. .fierJewelry Made and Repaired:lEla July 13, 1871.-tfi DB A. 12, 33 12., I .19 - G- I lINNE, subscriber informs the public that he continues the Barbering business in the ithoOin nest door to Mr. field's Grocery Store, and is at all times prepared to do hair cut ting,,shavitig,s hampooning etc.. in.the best style. The patronage .of the publib is respect fully solicited. • • • . , „ . Aug 23 1871. A..PRIPE. •411110 X. E RA. * 'llll - lElilit - tiVIE'. , R. - • *IPICITY'S celebrated Cholera Med icine prepared by DAVID M. HoovEn of Ringgold; fd.; can be had during the zee son at F. FoußrOAN'e Drug Store; and of dealers generally. T-avellinq Agent, July 21, '7l-6m I:IENEY MYERS. iOHAD AND HERRING . —Mess. Shad and Potamac Herrin in bbls: for sale by W. A. RIND. c *ElEtt V etttg. ROCK ,I TO SLEEP ) MOTHER, BY MB& ELIZABETH ABEBB Backward, turn backward, oh Time in your Make me a child again, just for to-night! Mother come back from the echoless shore, Take me again to your arms, as of yore ; Kiss from my forehead the furrows of care, noth tie "—^" threatis Smooth thTfew silver threads out my hair; Over my slumbers your loving watch keep, Bock me to sleep, mother. rock me to sleep. Backward, flow back Ward, tide of the years, I am so weary of toil, and of tears : Toil without recompence—tears all in vain, Take them—and give me my childhood again I have grown weary of dust and decay, Weary of flinging soul-wealth away, Wea . of sowing for others to rea 01 RR wnrszazi-pt-4-arnita•twntrinotr Tired of the hollow, thebase, the untrue, Mother, oh mother, my heart calls for you, Many a summer the grass has grown green, Blossomed and faded, our faces between Yet, with yearning and passioriate pain, Long I to-night for your presence again: - Corn - e - fr - orn - the - silen - ce - e - o - long - and - so — deepr Rock me to sleep, mother, rock me to sleep. Over my heart in the days that are flown, No love like mother's love ever has shown, 'ng, then, and unto my soul it shall seem, Womanhood's years have been only a dream Clasp to your heart in, loving embrace, With your light lashes just sweeping my face Never hereafter to wake or to weep, • Rock me to sleep, mother, rock me to sleep MORNING. The sun is rising, o'er the lea, On the brooklet, on the tree, ' Rests a glorious stream of light— Rests a ray of crimson bright ; Gene the shadows, dark and drear, Speaks all nature, "Day is here!" Breaks the morn—the shining day— Fades the night's dark streaks of gray; Nature rises from her couch, Bids deep sleep in darkness' crouch; Chantstthe sky-lark far and near,'. Shrilly , . calls the chanticleer. Froni.Ae mountain and the glen ; From the forest and the fen, Comes a cry, a song of glee, Hums the brooklet merrily ; - On the air, so bright and clear,. Floats light music, "Day is here." Nisttllautous AN UNWELCOME VISITOR. The burglars had been very active 'and bold in their operations, but as the ther mometer marked above the nineties for several days,• and I had little of valne in my room, 1 preferred to risk that little and leave my window open,although easy access, rather than undergo partial suffo cation. If an uninvited guest made his appearance and I did awake, I could feign sleep and let him take 'whatever he might find. "This class of visitors," I reasoned with myself, "do not generally commit person al violence if they can accomplish theft and make good their escape without it." These were my reflections every night as I undressed and threw myself on my bed, leaving my castle open to the enemy, I had been asleep one night an hour, when I was awakened by the falling of a small china ornament. Starting slightly and opening my eyes, I saw the gas burning and a tall broad shouldered man with his back turned toward me, his face looking over his shoulder to see whether the noise had awakened me. My self possession did not, however, forsake me. What follow ed illustrates the value of presence of mind. Opposite the side of the bed, and about eight feet from it was the door of my room, two or three feet from which was the stairs leading to the hall. The burglar must have used a ladder in ascending the roof, from which he entered the window. It was some thirty feet from the ground, and isolated. My plan was only to escape my self, but to effect his capture. I knew the policeman's heat, and he would pass in a short time. , • Sitting bolt upright, -then as I opened my eyes and saWthe burglar looking very unpleasantly at me, said rubbing I nv eyes • drowsily—althou'ghto. tell the truth, I never was more wide awake in my life; "Hello Jolla whafare' you looking' for? Can't you come : into my room, without making such a confounded noise?" The felloir taken somewhat aback at being addressed ia thja tvay; said in a low but menacing voice, and pointing a revol -ver la me : • "Shut up I what do you take me for ?" "I took you for John," I replied, with a well-assumed nonchalance. ArAnattr iitwsiketpzit-4)EvotTo To LUERATURE,LOqiut. AND 'GENERA:Ira NEIVirSi'ETC A . • „. • . • WA - OESBOiiO 9 , FRANKLIN COUNTY; PA., THLiRSD "But I didn't iutipoie he was aftetany thing valuable my , room, except one thing; and—by:the way you 'are , ' the 'un luckiest fellow in the wold." '"How's that ?" growled ,my visitor. "Well, I have a very good watch ; but if you want to get it you must pay a visit to the watch-Maker's after you leave here, for I had what I considered the bad, but what now seems the good fortune, to break the spring yesterday, and left it for re pairs." "You're a evidently astonished at my indifference. "What's the use of my getting excited or attempting to resist you? ' . You are armed, and'you see I am not. And if you had no weapon, your own fi l htin? wei:ht must be at least thirteen stone, while mine is not more than. nine and a half. I 'have no idea of interfering with you. If the room sere filled with diamonds I would not lift m • finler to save them.— ake a you can u n elam going - 16 sleep—so don't make any more noise. "Hold ?" said the fellow, "where's your keys ?" "I suppose yon want to make as much of a haul as you can," I said : "so look in my pants hanging over the bedpoast there and you'll find my pocketbook with -a-few-stamps-in-it." It was nearly time . for the policeman to pass and I paused to listen. I must in. a few moments put my plan into execu tion. A - rhtning showed me :lance quick as l 4 key of thedoor was on theoutside. listening expression did not escape irp and practical ear of my grim It was a curious scene, no doubt, ig in my bed, in my night clothes, - xi and this stalwart ruffian, pistol 1, glaring half-suspiciously, half isly atme and almost in the crouch tude of a tiger about to spring u prey. But there I sat, eoolly con ; with him, the necessities of the it keeping the wits too wide awake Nir my fears to get the upper hand instant. sought I heard the cry of fire. 'n•an instant, and in the dead stillness of the night, I heard the tramp of the po liceman. It was stillsome distance ott: "You will find," I said, "some clothes of mine in the press ; they will, hoWeVer, be too small for you. Good night : the keys are in the middle drawer." ' He turned to the drawer indicated and as he,did so, withone tremendous bound I cleared the space behind my bed and slammed the door and locked it upon him. Oblivious of my dishabille, I sprung to the steps. I had two flights to descend and open the door before I could reach the yard, but it was hardly possible fOr him to descend the ladder more, quickly. Bounding rather than running down stairs, I flung back the bolt and dashed into the yard. He was half Way down the ladder. Shouting "Police !" lustily, I siezed the ladder at the bottom, and using all my power, brought it and the burglar to the ground . with a crash. , The pistol he held in his hand' fell from his grasp. I made a dash for it and he springing to his feet like, a cat, rushed at me and as I stooped, he seized me by the back of the neck. I turned the pistol upward and pulled the aimed. It merely snapped—there were no More charges in it. With a terrible oath,the . ,buffled villian wrenched the wea pon from my grasp and raised it aloft to deal me what might have proved a ihtal blow, when there was a rush behind him and he was felled to the ground: The po liceman had heard my shout, and was just in time to rescue me. The burglar was soon secured, and in excitement I was about to relate the story I have teld, when the policeman, with a smile, suggested that I might "ketch cold in them clothes." I then remembered for the first time since I had sprung from bed, that I was shoeless and stoclongls and had nothing on but my night shirt, and beat a hasty retreat. With a long drawn breath I took my fine gold repeater, which had such a narrow escape, and was not at the watch makers after all, from under my pillow, looked at the hour, turned in, and after a little while fell asleep. It is almost needless to add that the a bove story, narrated afterward to a jury, had the effect of giving the visitor lodging in a public institution, and secured me a gainst a repetition of his call for at least ten years. THE YANKEE BOY IN RUSSIA One day a lad, apparently about nine teen, presented himself before our ambas sador at St. Petersburg. He was a pure specimen of the genus. Yankee; with sleeves too short for his bony arms, trow sers half way up to his knees, and hands playing with coppers and ten-penny nails . in his pocket. He introduced himself by saying, "I've just came out here to trade, with a few Yankee notions and I want to get sight of the Emperor. "Why do you wish to see him ?" "I'Ve brought him a present all the way from s.meriky. I respect him considera ble, and I want to get at him, to give it to him with my own hands." Mr. Dallas smiled as he answered : "It is such a common thing, my lad, to make crowned heads a present, expect ing something handsome in return, that I'm afraid the Emperor will consider, this only a Yankee trick. What have you brought? "An acorn." "An acorn ! Wlmt under the sun in duced you to bring the Emperor of Rus siaan acorn ?" ``Why, just before I sailed, mother and I went on to Washington to see about a pension ; and when we was there, Iro recious cool One !" he said ,u listenino• to? asked the thought We'd just step over to Mount Ver non. I picked up this acorn there, and I thought to myself I'd bring it to the Em peror. Thinks, says I, he must, have heard a considerable deal about our Gen eral Washington, and I expect he must admire our institutions. So now you see I've brought it and I want to get at him." "My lid, it's not a easy matter for a stranger toapproach an Emperor, and I am afraid-lie will take no notice of your present. You had better keep it." "I tell ou_ wand to have a talk with him. I expect Can tell him a thing or two about Ameriky. I guess he'd like mighty well to hear about our railroads, and our free schools, and. what a big swell our steamers cut : and when he hears ho* well our people_axe_getting will put him up to doing something. The long and short on't is, Ishan't be easy till I get a talk with the Emperor; and. I shall like to see his wife and, children. I _want to see how such folks brie: ._ u auu "Well, sir, since you are determined u pon it, I will do what I can for you ; but you must expect to be disappointed.— Though it will be rather an unusual pro ceeding, I would advise you to call on the Vice Chancellor and state your wishes ; he may possibly assist you." "Well,-that's-all-1 - want of you. - will call again, and let you, know how I get on." In two or three days he again appeared, and - said, "Well, I've seen the Emperor, and had a talk with him. He's a real gentleman,.l. can tell you. When I give him the acorn,he said he would set a great store by It , that there was no character in ancient or modern history he admired as much as he did our Washington. Hd said he'd plant it in his palace garden with his own hand ; and he did do it, for I see him with my own eyes ; He wanted to ask me so much about our schools and .railroads, and one thing or another, that he invited me to come again and see his daughters ; for he said his wife could speak better English than he could. So I went again yesterday ; and she's a fine, know rig woman,LtelLy_on ; a • d_her_daughte are nice gals." "What did the Empress say to you ?" "Oh, she asked a might of questions.— Don't you think, she thought we had no servants in Ameriky ! I• told her poor folks did their own work, but rich folks had plenty of servants." "But then you don't call'em servants," said she, "you call'em help." "I guess ma'am you've been reading Mrs. Trollope," says I, "We had that e'er book aboard our ship." The Emperor clapped his hands and laughed as if he'd kill himself. "You're right," said he, "you are right; we sent for an English copy, and she's been read ing it this very morning !" "Then. I. told him all I knew about our country, and he was mightilypleased.— He wanted to know how long I expected to stay in these parts. I told him Id'e sold all the notions I brought with me, and I guessed Mould go hack in the same ship: I bid 'emgood-bye, all around and went about my business. Ain't I had a glorious time? I expect you did not calculate to see me run such a rig ?" "No indeed I did not my lad. You may well consider yourself lucky; for it's a very uncommon thing for crowned heads to treat a stranger with so much distinction." A few days after, he called again and said: - e • I guess I shall stay a spell longer; I am treated so well. 'Tether day a grand officer came twmy room and told me the Emporer had sent him •to show 'me all the curiosities; and I dressed myself, and he took me with him in a mighty tine carriage, with four horses; and I have been to the theatre and museum; and I expect I have seen about all there is to be seen in St. Petersburg. What do you think of that, Mr. Dallas?" It seems so increditable that a poor, ungainly Yankee lad should b o thus loaded with attentions, that the ambassa dor scarcely knew what to think or to ay. In a short time his strange visitor re appeared. "Well," said he, "I made up my mind to go home, so I went to thank the Emperor, and bid him good bye. I thought I couldn't do no he'd been so civil. Says he, is there any thing else you'd like to see before you go back to America?" I told him I should like to get a peep at Moscow, for I'd heard considerable about the're setting fire to the Kremlin, and I'd read a deal about General Bonapart; But it would cost a sight o' money to go there, and I wanted to carry my earnings to my moth er. So I bid him good-bye and came off. Now what do you guess he did next morn ing? I vow he sent the same man, in regimentals to carry me to Moscow in one of his own carriages, and bring me back again when I've seen aILA wart to see !--- And we're gOink to-morrow morning, Mr. Dallas. What do you' think of that. And sure-enough the.next evening the Yankee. boy , passed the Ambassador's house in a splendid coach and four, wa ving his handkerchief and shouting, "Good-bye ! Good-bye 1" Mr Dallas afterwards•learned from the Emperor that all the particulars related by this adventurous youth were strictly true. He again heard from him at Mos cow; waited upon by the public officers, and treated with as much attention as is usually bestowed on Ambassadors.— Now, who but a yankee could ha v e done all that ? • A southern editor is bitterly opposed to the education of women as surgeons. Sup pose, he says, a gentleman were put un der the influence of chloroform by such a doctress—what is to prevent the woman from kissing him ? Y, JANUAIIir 18, 1872. Died of Whisky. E ' • If e.pitaphs"alifa_is tolcythe whole truth these'vords ' woad' cut ou - Many, a tombstone. Not only on the • rough. stones that mark the graves of the hum ble and the poor, but also 'on . "-the` Mat ble monuments that rise above the: dust of the children of wealth and genius, would appear the words, 'Died of Whisky!' tlow sad and disgraceful the record!— What volumes are condensed into three words ! Read them, ponder them, be warned by them. They will give you. food for thought. They tell of charac ter ruined; money sqandeted, families beg gared, hopes crushed, the mind besotted and soul lost. They will recall sad mem• ories in the life of every reader. There -is-hardly—a—man—who—cannot—go—back. through twenty and . call up the face of some friend or acquaintance of whom he must say, "He died of whisky.', Not that the kind and considerate phy- of the deseased so admitted, but still the sober, candid conclusion of disinterested parties, and interested ones, if they would utter their honest thoughts, is, "He died • Whisky." Now, reader, recall the past, and sec how many start up at memories bidding to attest this fact. Young men of fine talents and brilliant promise ; men of ma ture years and the best capacity for pro fessional or practicali business ; old men, whose last years grew darker and more sorrowful as they hastened to complete -their—epitaph—Died--of--whisky;- - these from all the classes, swell the great army of victims to the insatiate demon in the bottle. The warnings are abundant and and impressive against a death by whis ky. Knowing, then, all the evil that whis ky has done, and all the evil that it is now doing, in churches and out of church can any man who loves his race refuse to take up arms against such a foe?—Rich mond Advocute. A Nice Little Story•. As pleasant a little story as was ever -told-is-this-regarding au Albany physi cian, by a correspondent of the Port Jef ferson Independent Press, writing from New Haven :—An aged• widow in Mas sachusetts received a telegrm athat her on ly son was dying at Lawrence, Kansas.— Notwithstany her extreme age and \ fee ble health she must see her son. She un dertook the journey. 'The train was de layed. When it arrived at Utica she was taken violently ill. A yoUng phy sician assisted her to a hotel, and provid ed every thing he could for her comfort. Her detention by sickncis and moderate means would not have allowed ' her; to pursue her journey, but. for the kindness of the attending stranger. He paid her bills, assisted her to the cars, and accom panied her to Buffalo. At - patina. b she requests his address.— Two , monthslatter this stranger was seat ed in his office at Albany. A stranger entered, and with soine conversation pre iented the doctor 'with a Government Bond of $5OO, as a reward for his kind.- ness to the old lady, paying,, !‘She was my mother." She died.a..fewdays aftr reaCh ing me, and I recovered. Had it not been for your kindness she would have died on the road. I am her , son Who was sick.. 'I am a banker; but money can never repay the debt I owe to you for your generous kindness to my dear, good mother. God bless you!' May God bless and the world 'applaud such no ble act of benevolence Dr. D. T. Croth era, of Albany, bestowed on this occasion, and which the old lady's son so richly re wardea. Home Life. One marked difference between the,an imate and inanimate object consists' in the need of the former for a home. Most of all is this necessity manifested in , ithe human race ; and greater the civilization, the more tenacious is the clinging to home and the more profuse are the means brought to bear to perfect its arrange.. meats. If this need of home be so inherent hi our natures, and so important to our wel fare, it becomes the duty of all to see :to it that they contribute their share to, its establishment and perpetuation: Thia obligation, in some .of its many forms, rests upon every one. The • father. who maintains the lousehold, the mother )vho directs it. the children who - are' its ley, are Call active and responsible -agents in making home the centre of their truest life, the birthplaceof noble aspirations and generous affection's, and the spot' to which the memory of future. years will cling most fondly. _ The conception. c i f the felipity possible to be reAliza4 , by true home,life falls usu rally far short of a true standar i d.' The means of heftiness within -tlio reach of every household are greater... Clan .they are an are of, and liomore - closely within their reach. Riches may purchase inx uries, but never can buy the sweet con tent and satisfaction that -flow ~over the humblest household where Affection and order reign supreme. Let us, then, 'Cher ish our homes as our most sacred-treas ures. • Many persons seem to think that a church is the grand emporiam of, "art and.lash ion," w•h re the milliner, dress maker and tailor each exhibit his or her skill, on hu man dummies, said to be got up in the image of their Creator! It is an exploded theory that• women dress to please the men. They dress to please or spite each other. 'Any . girl of sense and experience knows that it is just as easy to break a man's heart in a two dollar muslin, neatly made up, as it is in a five hundred dollar silk costume made by a man milliner. NT S THINGS WQR ) FORGETTING.-HOW much wiser we w. Id .be if we could . re member all the th '; worth remember ring 'that occur da) day all around us. And how much be • r We would , be if we could' forget all tha is worth forgetting. It is almost frightfu nd altogether hu miliating to think h. much there is in the common on-going domestic and so cial life' which deserve. . othing but to be instantly and forever rgotten. Yet it is equally amazing how rge a class who have no other business bu to repeat and perpetuate these very things. This is the vocation of gossips—an order ofsocie tY that perpetrates more 3:11 ,chief than-all the combined plagues of Egypt put to gether. Blessed is that man or woman who can lot dmp all th - e - hurrs and this tles, instead of picking them up and fas tening on to the ipassenger. Would we let the vexing and malicious sayings die, how fast the lacerated and scandal-ridden Forget the gossipings and bickering', the backings and sneaking inuendoes, aryl re member only The little gleam ofsunsline and poetry that can illuminate the hum blest life, if we only drive awt►y and foLi get the clouds engendered by things that should never be remembered. A GOOD ONE ON JUDGE EuELEI-- Durina . '' a recent trial in Greencasile, JudgcEckles sought to annoy a fine Old gentleman named Janies Ingle, who was on the witness stand, by asking him some questions. -- He - came out second best, as the following will show: Eckles—"Mr. Ingle arn't you a preach er? Ingle—Yes Judge, it sort of one. Well, about such a one as you used to be. Judge Eckles at one periou of his life was a preacher, and this hit of course brought down the house. He was not willing to give it up so, and tried it a gain; Eckles—"What do you do for a liveli hood, brother Ingle?" Ingle—"l sell shingles, lathes and salt." — Eb - kles—"you sell sa. Ingle—"Yes." Eekels—"Now, tell us brother Ingles, don't you sometimes sell salt to your cus tomers that isn't good ?" Ingle—"No. Jude, I don't. The salt I sell is good, but I. have never sold any strong enough to save you." The house roared. A REMARKABLE PROPH,ESY.—The fob lowing, which known as "Maher Ship ton's Prophesy," Was 'first ' . Published in 1488, and republished 1614. It will be noticed, that all, the events predicted, in it, except that, mentioned in the last two lines —which' is still in the future—haVe alrea dy 'come to pass : ttifriikei horses 'shall gki, -Arid accidents fill , the World with woe - Around thcworld:thoughts shall fly Jri : the twirddlpg of an eye. , Waters,sball ye more wonders d 0,;,, Now strange, yot . ,sliall pii? r , " ' 'The W6rld'uPdide'do*n*shall be, • Arid gold be'foind i'dot of tree. • 'Through , hills rrien shall ride, And no.horse(or asshe at his side. :Under. water men shall walk ; , Shall tide, shall sleep, shall talk; In the dir men shall be seen;,.,.. Tit white, in black, in green. Iron in the waters shall float, As easy as_a wooden:beat. * Gold shall be foind end fonnd„,i-, In a lased that' i sinot known. Fire and water shall wonders do, Engiand shall• at last admit a Jew. The world 'to an' end shall tome In eighteen hnridred and-eighty-one. BODIES.—'The moon•is cur nearest celeitial acquaintance, but it has the stire'distande of two hundred' and thir ty-seventhousand miles. Great as is the space- between_ the earth and moon, the sun could not pass through it •; but still perhaps a still better idea•of the sun can be 'obtained trent "the fact that if it should be entirely hollowed' out and the earth placed in the centre, there would still be roomier the moon's entire path and an =occupied, space of 204,000 miles in di itmeter all round,=--for the diameter oldie thin is 882,000 miles! No wonder _David exclahned, "When I consider-the heavens, the work of thy. lands, and:the moon and the stars which thou „hest made,Lord, what is man tnt - ..ttiott Visite:Stlin !" •.. A Nrw TELtaity,,—A 'preacher who used to bold_fourth to outdoor audiences, Yiils,pfeachipg once from. a text Which bad some bearma Oh - the Day id ;and Goliath combat. - The-old - fell - OW' (the preacher wo4nean,) had some quaint ideas 'of his .own,,and wasn't- afraid to speak them out. Alluding to the, probable cause of David's heroic conduct, and his, readiness to engage - in mifirtat combat with the ji; Ant; he said: "Now, my hearers, what do you suppose was-the reason- that David : was,ao. mighty to go out and fight .Goliath? Wasit.because , he had relig iOn in Wm? Was it because he Wanted to do' good generally ? No. I'll tell you What 'he done it for, but there's no use of anbpdy's denying it. He was struck after one of Saul's gab!" Good manners are sure to procure fe.s. This i 3 a good day.to stop. chew4ng to• bacco. A farmer saw an advertised Acelpt to prevent wells ar d cisterns 'Tr*, 1ree41131,•• He sent his money, .and 't4OiV„dtl,th6 - ans. wer '"Take in your well or.` s iistern on cold nights and keep it bythe'lltfr." • Subscribe for the Recorcl. : /: • -.• ' ,; When does It man have to keep his word ? When no one will take it. Go to strangers for charity, acquain tances for advice, relatives for nothing. iAcorn extracter that has never been patented—the crow. Then'a no harm in a glass of whisky-- if you allow it to remain in the g1a55;.....„--, The three great conquerers of the world are Fashion, Love and Death. 7'Vh‘at did Adam first plant in the Gar den of Edeu? His foot. Josh Billings says that opera music don't have any more affect on 'him than castor oil would on a graven image. When a man gets so low that he will not even borrow trouble, his case is des. . erste. _ - * flower of youth never appears so beautiful as when it bends toward the Sun of sighteousness. :acry l l her rin The litest device for "braking up" a sitting lien is to.put u couple of lumps of ice in the nest. . . That "I\ hat is home without a mother? as the young girl sent the old. lady to chop . .. oae ......._ wood. --.. Why is an -umbrella in wet wheather liken-worn-out horse? -Because - it - is - used up. V -ming-men-anxious-to - get - rid - of - t ,-."• • wild oats, will do well to get a sewing machine. Those covered with calico aro the befit. , . . What is thg difference between a fool and a looking-glass ?—one speaks without reflecting, and the other reflects without . speaking. ' - A man who hzis .traveled through New Jersy sa,ys'he saw someland there so poor that you couldn't raise a disturbance on A San :Francisco girl recently under took the arcenic treatment for procuring a clear andbeautifulcomplexion she took-, ed white enough in her, coffin. A clergyman named Fidcile "respect fully decliners" the degree of. D. D.,,be cause, as he said, be really aidi not *ish to be knpwn as.the Rev. Fiddle D. D. & A riddle which ought never`to have been'printed- - Why. are engaged ladies like old boots? Because they are no good without their fellows. ' A young lad Whb Wassailed as a `wit= ness,Wll9. asked if he knew . the nature of an oath,' and where .he would go if h;0 told a, lie. He said that he supposed he should, go where all the lawyers went. A colorci).. preaChWi,AniFicOursipg to his people on the . eft any - of earnest pray er, delivered-himself in this mannerb r .".l tell you bredren; 'tia prayer what gibs de debil de:lockjaw.", , Kitchen - glilh are now' called "young ladies of the lower -parler. People who grind scissors; knives and razors are term ed "gentleman of the revolution,' and folks who dig clams are called "profound investigators." Scene in the cars: A Candy-boy, pass ing through a car, meets a cross old gen tleman, and says "Pop-corn'pop-corn "Hain't got no teeth;',, angrily replies the nian. "Gum-dropi I gum-drotn calla the smart bow.. ' This is not bad ' fur a Long Island newspaper: "A',.Southampton maiden lady has just completed the knitting of a stock ing which her mother began before her marriage, sixty years,ago, and it is not a bad stocking, not by a darned sight.— It must be a long leg-I-see; perhaps it was the work of an heirloom;-' There is a sharp rivalry just: now in Alabama among the different guano deal ers. One of them, by way of showing. thouperiority of his guano over any oth er, says that a farmer recently put a sam ple of it in his pocket, in which- there hap pened to be a carpet tack, and start ed home on horse-back. gefore reaching his house, his steed broke down,' and the farmer Was at ti "low to • discover the cartse,tmtil he found • that the Carpet tack had grown to . be &, long. bar, of. railway iron": • , , . • A man out )Vest read that dry cop perds putinte a bed of ants would - cause them to leave, and- he thtiught he would tr_2 some on his mother-in-laves bed, and see f she wouldn't go. It didn't affect th old lady in the least. -At last ac unts she ocouraed the best bed in the house, and "bossed" the whole family.— Ho thinks neat time bell try 'whether three or fonr pounds 'of nitro-glycerine won't move the old woman a peg or two "What is home without a mother? An the young girl said when she sent the old lady to chop some wood," $2,00 PER YEAR NUMBER 30 , Mit and (Varner. The"vvorld in arms—the babies. , , y is a leaky barrel like a cowar:rt" strongest kind of a hint—a young :king a gentleman to see if one, of I:.s would go on his little finger.