The Forest Repawu
U published .very Wedaosday, by
J. E WENK.
023 la Smearbaugh & Coi Bulldln j
XLM STREET, TIONESTA,' rJL
Terms, - 9 l.oo Per Vear.
Ko subscriptions received for a shorter
period than three mocth.
Correspondent. oIljr jrom all parts of
th country. No noftvwlll be taken ol
anonymous oommunio.iiioas.
Tli a regularity -w ibh which tha lata
Mr. Keely kept Lis victims signing
checks was perhaps the nearest ap
proach to perpetual motion on reo
r ' ' -
And now Germany has decided to
increase her artillery. That disarm
anient proposal is looking bluer and
bluer. In fact, all the Towers are go
ing abend as if it had never been put
forward.
American exports of every kind are
increasing steadily, agricultural as
well ns manufactured. And there is
no immediate likelihood of radical
change in this respect. American
natural resources are 'so vast and var-
iai art A Amoriitan infliintrv nnv in HA
efficient and well orgauized that Amer
ican producers are prepared to adjust
themselves to any change that may oc
cur in economic- conditions.
It has long been romarked by cer
tain physicians that the origiu of can
cer should be sought for in some widely
spread condition effecting various an
imal and vegotable organisms. This
. , . .1. ; ... -
Idea is uaseu upon tue seeming ire
quency, in especial, of the disease in
isolated housos on the banks of rivers,
particularly if close to woods, it hav
ing been observed, too, that trees un
der these same conditions are affected
with veritable tumors which bear a
striking rosemblanoe to cancer. Late
investigations by. M. Noel, of Paris,
are said to show a certain relation be
tween arboreal "cancer" and that of
man; thnt is, not only the frequency
of malignant tumors in habitations
surroundod by or near woods, but also
' a considerable mortality from cancer
among certain persons whose occupa
tion nfiliiTPs tliAm tn livn in thnsa turn-
ditions, as, for example, exoise offi
cers," who in certain seotions pass
through long distances in isolated
woods,
Women show genius of a high ordei
' whenever thoy attempt to explaiu the
causes of the ills which afflict most of
mankind. A woman, one of those in
. tellectual up-to-dnte womep, who
- would rather discuss the- nebularhy
pothesis and account for psychological
phenomena than'cook or attend tc
wifely duties, has stated that the
colors of the drossos which women
wear are responsible for their uervouf
complaints. Green, for instance, pro
duces indigestion, while ball gowns of
the same color causo headaohes; a
royal pnrplo dress is a sovereign rom
edy for a sere threat; black, that dig
nified color which adorns most women
so gracefully and bewitohingly, is re
sponsible for the over-excited person;
certain other colors close to - the
throat, she avers, produce blindness,
deaf ucss and other horrible afflictions.
The benefactors of humanity art
those who reduce any philo3ophy to s
practical sciouce, and this woman
heaven bless her! is entitled to a niche
in Hie world's pantheon for supersed
ing the science of medicine by point
iug out the relation of colors to health.
All of us may rest assured that food
has nothing to do with indigestion; it
is the color green. And whenever we
are physically, meutolly and morally
Buffering the colors we wear are not in
the proper juxtaposition to the human
frame. The evideuce presented may
uot be indisputable, but with this
feminine logio has no concern.
The oyster has just been the sub
ject of an elaborate communication to
the British Eoyal Society by Profes
sor Herdraan and Mr. R. Boyce. They
8iiy that they did not find the typhoid
bacillus in any oysters obtained from
the 'sea or market that would only
(which was not their purpose) from a
tainted spot. But for experiment they
infected clean oysters with germs, and
the two principal results were emin
ently satisfactory. One was that,
while the typhoid bacilli could be de
tected in the body of the infected oys
ter for ten days, or even more, after
introduction, they showed no signs of
increase, and iu the intestine actually
perished. The other showed that by
washing infected oysters ina stream
of clean sea water the typKid bacilli,
in from one to seven days, uniformly
and invariably either greatly dimin
ished or totally disappeared. It is
clear, therefore, that sea water is hos
tile to the development of these nox
ious germs. Of the green'oysters, the
investigators say that some are per
fectly wholesome, while others are not,
The reasfcu is a srlIe one. The
greenness in the former case is due to
the presence of a harmless vegetable
pigment. There may be also a small
-quantity of an iron salt associated With
it; but this has no connection with the
coloring matter. In the other kinds
of greeu oysters the color is due to a
deleterious salt of copper- The epi
cure, therefore, will do well not to eat
green oysters unless he knows where
thej coint from.
VOL. XXXI. NO.
AM going to give
yon the money,
Nell, and let you
buy it yourself,"
said Mrs. Thome
rather wearily.
"What with com
pany yesterday,
aud getting your dress ready to day,
r.nd-Flaxie cross and half sick with a
sold, I Bimply haven't the courage to
go to the milhuer s witu you.
The Jittle cirl looked, up brightly
Sha was barely thirteen, nud the
thought of going all alone to Miss
Prim's for her new Easter liuery was
rather pleasant to her.
"Oh. mamma, you don't need to go!
I'm sure you don't! I can pick out
inat whnt I want, and if you don't like
it when it comes home wo can change
it, you know. I might go down right
aivnv and ' see what Miss Trim lias
Mav I. mamma?" and the little girl
rose eagerly.
"Why ves. Nell. I snpposo so. Tou
can tell Miss Prim that you want to
sue, what she has and tho prices, ana
thai tou will be iu to morrow to take
one. Don't go over two dollars and a
half. Ne e. That s all 1 can atioru
this time. That ought to buy really a
a vorv nina hat for a little girl. Not
tnn mneh trimming, remember. I
don't believe in so much show for
Easter as some folks moke. Goodby,
dear: be homo early."
Nellie had been hastily putting on
her things as her mother talked, and
was out the door almost bofore she
had finished. She tried to walk at
first, but her feet kept going faster and
faster, until she was fairly in a run,
bofore she was half way to Miss Prim's
little shop, that was quite in the cen
tre of tho village.
' At Miss Prim's she wss all upset.
There were so many hats, and most of
them so pretty und becoming, that she
could not choose. Sue had almost ue
cided upon a dainty little Leghorn,
trimmed with violets and daisies, when
her eve caught a hat in another case
that made her forget all the others. It
was richer and more profusely
trimmed. When Miss Prim placed it
besides the others they looked cheap
and scautr.
"Oh, Mis Prim, how much is it?"
she asked breathlessly.
"I have been asking four dollars for
it, but it is so near Easter now you
may have it cheaper. You may have
it for three anc a half.
The girl's face fell. It was a dollar
more than she could pay.
"I am afraid it is more than mamma
can afford this year," she said regret
fully.
All the way home she thought of
that beautiful hat. She walked rather
slowly now, thiukiug and thinking
very hard. She knew it would be use
less to ask her mother to buy the more
expensive hat. Mrs. Thome was kind,
almost indulgent with hor children,
but she was firm in what she told
them. Nellie did uot entef the house
as gayly as she had left it, and her
mother thought her tired.
"Tou have been finding it hard to
choose. Nell." she said, smiling. "Tell
me about it."
"Yes.' mamma, there wero so many,
I picked a Leghorn staw, triinmod with
violets and daisies. It is two and a
"oh, miss prim! how much is it?"
half. Miss Prim had another a good
deal like it, only lots finer ond more
trimming, for three and ahalf that had
Viann fnnr Irtllfirfl "
;n ,i well
this vniir. T'm sore." said her mother
gently. "We havj had a good deal of
expense, you know."
The little girl was very quiet that
evening and went to bed early. Far
in the night the woke with a start.
She had been dreaming of tho two hats
and Miss Prim. In her dream she had
said to Miss Prim, "I cannot buy it,
because I have only two dollars and a
half," and Miss Prim had said, "Why
yes, yon-have, Nellie; you have a gold
dollar put away in a drawer at home."
It was this that hod made her jump
aud wake up, for sho did have a gold
dollar that her uncle, Henry Thome,
had given her once when she was a
baby, and it was pt away in a drawer(
50. TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, MARCH 20, 1890. $1.00 PER ANNUM.
BY ALBERT BIQELOW PAINE. "
just as Miss Prim had said. She had
not thought of this before, and it was
of no use to think of it now, for though
she had never been told not to spend
tho dollar, it was only because her
mother believed she would never even
dream of doing so.
But Nellie did dream of it, over and
a ... , 1 -
over, ana eacu time sue wone wiia a
start and lay awake a long time, one
was pale and silent next morning, and
when she set out for Miss Prim's the
money that her mother had given her
she carried in ner little purse, wnue
deep down in her pocket was Uncle
Henry Thome's gold dollar. She had
not fully decided yet that she was go-
" ...... m u ; l
iug to spend it, out sue naa ieu ior u
where she kept it in a little ring box
under her clothes the first thing when
she got up that morning and the little
ring box hod been pushed back under
her clothes empty when she came down
to breakfast.
Miss Prim was unusually pleasant
that morning. She brought both hats
out to the light for Nellie to see and
said there was more thou a dollar s
difference iu the two, and Nellie could
see that herself. But Miss Prim looked
a little surprised when sho saw the
gold dollar.
"Why." sue said. "1 naven t seen
one for a long time. I'll keep it, I
cuess. for a little niece of Tv.ine."Then
she wrapped up the hat for Nellie,
talking pleasantly.
When Nellie started witu ner pur
chase there- was a feeling of triumph
in nossessinff it that wore oft as she
walked along. She did not feel at all
happy in the way she had expected.
She remembered now (or tne nrst time
that her mother would no doubt won
CUrist is risen! Hear t bo song,
Filling nil tho Isles ot sir.
Whore the stars of glory throng,
Whore the angels answer prayer
Christ Is risen over all
Every claim ot mortal seDse,
Bin no longer need enthrall,
Death no more life's ardor
quoad).
der at the' cheapness of the hat aud
sneak of it in a way that would make
hor silence equal to a falsehood. She
had never told her mother an .untruth.
Then she remembered how happily she
had tripped away to Miss Prim's yester
day. It did not seem to ner tnat sue
could be the same little girl.
But Mrs. Thome said less than
Nellie had expected. She was tired
and only kissed her pretty daughter.
"Why, Nell, she smiled, "1 don't
.. ,
see what you would want oi more
trimming than that. I think a good
'eal less would havo answered. it s
rather old for you now, but will be
nice with a littlo alteration for next
year."
With a sign oirenei JNeiue toot uer
purchase to her room. That night she
dreamed again. Over and over sue
thought Miss Prim's niece had come
to see her and brought tho gold dollar.
Her mother had seen it and said,
'Why, that is Nellie's gold dollar that
her Uncle Henry Thome gave her."
And then the little girl had said,
"No. it isn't; it's mine, that my Aunt
Hester Prim sent me on Easter."
WTien she was dressed in her pretty
new gown and ready to go to church
next morning she certainly looked
very sweet, though she was so pale
that her mother said, "I'm afraid
you are not well, Nellie. The excite
inent has been too muoh for you,
Easter isn't only for pretty things, my
dear."
Flaxio's cold was no better, and
Mrs. Thorno did not go to church.
By and by she prepared dinner.think-
ing Nellie would be home presently
and be hungry. Somewhat before she
expected her the door suddenly flew
open and the littlo girl burst into the
room. The new hot she flung op. the
table, and rushing to her mother she
burst into a torreut oi tears anu
sobs.
"Oh, mamma! mammal" she wailed.
"I deceived you. It is the one that
cost a dollar more, and I spent the
crnld dnllar that Unole Harry Thorne
gave me when I was little!"
Mrs. Thorne looked grove,
"Tell me all about it, dear," she
said gently.
Aud Nellie told her everything,
dreams and all.
"Aud then the sermon was about
the Insurrection," she concluded,
tearfully, "and the preacher said that
even our new dresses and our new
hats were were symbols of of a new
life, and cried as if her own childish
heart were breaking.
Mrs. Thorne went herself to Miss
Prim's the next day. The little mil
liner had not jaited with the gold
dollar, and when she heard the story
pf if she -exchanged it willingly and
I)
said she would exchange the bat too.
At first Mrs. Thome thought it best
not to do this, but after reflecting a
few moments, decided that it wonld
be too severe on Nellie to make her
wear so 16jr. the Lat she now "hated,
and when she left took the pretty
little Leghorn that Nellie had first
chosen. Nellie herself returned a
little later with the other, and Miss
Prim kissed her and gave her some
lemcn drops, and told her that she
had proven herself a sweet and worthy
child. And Nellie may have cried the
least bit, but she was very happy.
New York Herald.
FLOWERS IN OUR CHURCHES.
In No Other Country Are They Vied
to
Such an Extent at Easter.
As long as the high festival of Easter
has been celebrated the custom has
prevailed of removing all signs of
mourning from the church, relighting
the caudles and unveiling the statues
and crosses. The use of flowers as
decorations is a much more receut cus
tom. Iu England it is first mentioned
by a writer in the Gentleman's Maga
zine in JUiy, 1106, .wno conjectures
that "the flowers with which many
churches are ornamented on Easter
day are most probably intended as em
blems of the resurrection, having just
risen from the earth in which during
the severity of the winter they seem
to have been buried.'
In the early days of this country
flowers were seldom seen as decora
tions, and it is only within tne last
ouarter of a century tnat they nave
been used with reckless extravagance
In fact, the first attempt to decorate
old Trinity Church in Ne r York City
for Easter is still within tne memory
of those living. A sweet smelling, in
offensive little bunch of blossoms, that
had been carefully chosen, was placed
in the font on Easter morning. But
such a furor was raised by the mem
bers of the church against the innova
tion that it was thought best to re
move the intruder before the afternoon
service. To-day the churoli is always
decorated on Easter Sunday. Tn no
country in the v orld are flowers used
in such abundance at Easter as in
America.
Christ Is rlsenl Evil powers
Flee like mists tho morning sun,
Truth descends In healing showers,
Ood and Goodness shine as one!
In these resurrection hours
Let us from our Idols turn,
Wreath the cross with Easter flow
ers, And the risen Christ discern.
Easter Day.
If you wnlte up Sunday morning when it's
qulot in tuo street,
And you hear the church bell? chiming
iar awav:'
It their melody Is rich and more than usu
ally sweet.
It's because they're ringing in the Easter
Day.
When you seo the streets alive with women
radiant ana rnir,
And bats ot every fashion, hue and ray,
Till vou think a million butterflies are
winging in the air,
Then you'll know for certain that it's
Easter Day.
If vou notice during service, when the
Lenten oravers are read.
And every pretty woman kneels to pray,
That she's taking in the bonnet of her
neighbor lust ahead.
You'll excuse her, 'cause you know It's
Eastor Day.
When you tuck, the blessed little 'uns in
bed so snug and tight.
And "Now I lay me down to sleep," they
say,
Just tell 'em 'bout their Bavior 'fore you
klia 'am all sood nlsht.
And thank tho Lord we've got an Easter
Day.
Th. Mohammedan Easter.
IWrain is the name of the Moham
medan Easter. It "follows Kamadan,
which corresponds to Lent, and lasts
three days. During this time visits
are exchanged and presents made in
mn nh the same spirit as that which
characterizes our Christmas. At Con
stantinoplo the streets are thronged
and bands of music parade day and
night. The decorations of the boats
in the JBosphorus are striking and
beantiful. The Sultan celebrates the
dav by worshipping in the mosque, af
ter which he gives an informal recep
tion la his friends in the palace of
Dolma-baktohe. During this recep
tion the Sultan occupies a throne of
great splendor plaoed in tho midst oi
the vast and beautifully decorated au
dience hall.
Easter In Olden Time.
Easter was at one time celebrated
by feasts and games held iu the
churches. These at hrst were decor
ons and useful in bringing the con
crreErations together in rejoicing after
the seven duties imposed upon them
dnrinsf Lent. The custom was aDan
doned because of the excesses, which
became a scandal to the Churcn.
An Easter Superstition.
It is curious, in view of the modern
view of Easter and the "Eastor par
ade." to find the superstition still ex
taut in East Yorkshire, England, that
it is vorv unlucky not to wear new
carments on that day. In that dis
trict rooks will ruin your other cloth
ing if you fail to wear some new thing,
ae!
MICKEY FINN'S
EASTER EGp.
8 - '
Q Th. Surprise Which th. Lad's Mother !
W UuwIttlDRly Provided. .
A a T E 11 was
speeding away,
and Mrs. O'Brien
had run in to
borrow a draw
ing of tea and to
ask for the. loan
of a sand-iron.
She found Mrs.
w- Finn sitting in a
chair bursting with laughter. Tears
of delight were streaming down her
face in a torrent.
"Sit you down, Mrs. O'Brien," said
she, "and wait till I can get mo
breath."
And what's the matter with yon,
at all, at all?" exclaimed Mrs.
O'Brien, envying the cause of such
joyful cyclone.
"'lis all about ue littlo boy,
Mickey, and his Easter egg," replied
Mrs. Finn, wiping her eyes. "A
weeny joke I played on him, d'ye
see? If you saw the face of the little
lad whin ah dear, I'm laughiu' all
day about it, Mrs. O'Brien to see
the egg, and me husband laugbin' till
I thought he'd have a fit, aoushla,
and"
"Will you stop goin nialvatherin'
and tell me what it's all about?" said
Mrs. O'Brien impatiently.
"Well, you muBt know this," re
sumed Mrs. Finn, "that Mickey
wanted wan o' thim eggs wid paint on
it like they have in the candy store
windys, and I had no money to buy
wan. But I told him Saturday night
to niver fear but he'd have a nice big
egg on Easter mornin', all blue like a
robin's egg. You'll mind I'm after
sittin' the blue hin on thirteen eggs,
and the time was near up for the
chickens to come. Well, after the
little lad went to bid on Saturday
night I took wan of the eggs from un
der the bin and put it in the oven to
keep it warm till the mornin'. There
was no fire in the stove and only a
little hate in the oven, d'ye see. On
Easter mornin' I put the egg in some
warm bluein' water before the boy
got up and whin he came down to his
breakquist there it was on the plate
before him, blue as the heavens in
July. 'Twas actin" mighty quore,
though, Mrs. O'Brien, rollin' aronnd
on the plate as if tho divvil was in it,
and me husband and little Mike look-
at it as if 'twas a ghost they saw.
But. Mrs. OBnen, if yell believe
me. I had to keep me back to the
table. I was that full of laughter,
Ye'd think the egg was tryin' to stand
on its little end. twas that full of
tricks.
" 'Tis only a cruked egg, and your
plate is standin' down till, said me
husband. "Whack it wid your spoon,
me lad!"
So Mickey took the egg in his
baud and gave it a slap with tho
spoon, and out camo tho head of a
chickeu that let a yolp out of him
that 'ud wake the dead. Sum, ue
kicked the blue shell off him hiO
you'd shed a petticoat, and waded up
to his knees in the gravy oi tuo pom
chops, and him howhn like a cr.t-
bird, and egg-shells in the coffee and
the mashed potatoes aud me husband
on the flure velhn' wid delight! un,
glory be, Mrs. O Bnen; me sides is
achiu'. 1m afeard 1 11 oust some
thin' inside o' me!" Mickey Finn.
What Happened to Their Decorated Eggs,
They put them under the stove to
dry.
-M! !!!-
IM
Harper's Bazar.
The White House Lawn.
Easter morning in Washington sees
all the children marching to the
White House. It looks as if a Kate
Green way and Little Lord Fauntleroy
army was invading the home of the
President. Each child has a basket
of eggs. The south lawn is their des
tination. Here is a slight hill. The
little onos, and incidentally their
"grown up" friends, who take a gTeat
interest iu the game, roll the eggs
down the hill. Mrs. Cleveland Uways
took an interest in tho egg-rolling,
and usually spent Sunday in the Bed
Boom, where she could watch. tUl
pretty scene.
PUZZLE DEPARTMENT. 5
The solutions to these puzzles will
ap-
pesr in a succeeding issue.
18
CO. Six Meheadiueuts.
1. Behead a single thread, and have
a tune. 2. A portion, and have a
small animal. 3. Put down and have
to help. 4. A possessive pronoun,
and have another possessive pronoun.
5. To close, and have a cottage. G.
To whirl aronnd, and have a fastener.
TO. Four Famous Women.
1. A painter Aosrhbnorue. 2. A
life-saver Eagerdnglari. 3. A singer
Njyenldni. 4. A leader in battle
Onjaforca.
71. A Charade.
My Hrst is something that travelors need)
My second Is something tor which raei
bleed;
My wholo yon will find In less than an hour
To be a very much loved flower.
71 A Square.
1. To send away. 2. To conceal
3. A thonght. 4. A fruit.
1NSWEK3 TO PltKVIOUS PUZZLES
63. An .Acrostio Lad, and, fad,
are, you, Eve, top, top, ear Lafay
ette.
66. A Transposition - Lament,
mantle, mantel, mental.
07. A Corrugated Column
ADDER AID
MACAW
IKE
IRENE
ONE
TASTE
C3. A Square--
F. O M E
OPAL
MAUL
ELLA
SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL.
Professor Zickler recently found
that a ray of ultra violet light trans
mitted as many as 200 metres (over 200
yards) will work a telegraph instru
ment at that distance. Bays of this
kind have the property of causing an
electric spark to pass between two
highly charged conductors, whioh but
for the light would not spark. This
effect is made to work the telegraph
instruments.
An inventor iu Newark, N. J., has
found a practical way to embody alco
hol iu solid form. He boils the alco
hol and adds to it a portion of a waxy
substance that he keeps secret, and the
result is a paste in which the alcohol
is suspended. This paste is much
handier to transport and use than the
liquid alcohol, and it is claimed that
in this form wood alcohol can be made
much more widely useful as a fuel
especially for chafing dishes and the
like. Another advautage claimed is
that the solidified alcohol does not
burn as rapidly and wastefully as thr
liquid.
Air whose oxygen is ozonized by
the brush discharge of an electrio cur
rent of 60,000 tolOO.OOO volts is used
at St. Manr, near Paris, for purifying
water. The ozonized r is pumped
into lofty cylindrical sterilizers of cast
iron. These are divided internally
by numerous celluloid plates with
very large holes, and the water, be
ing made to descend slowly and in a
state of fine division, undergoes long
and perfect contact with tho ozone,
insuring complete desti'action of dead
organic matter as well as of living
germs. The establishment supplies
Paris with about 22,000,000 gallonr
of pure water daily at a cost of $30.
The Journal of Geology is authority
for the statement that a new mineral
has recently been discovered which as
a fuel is far superior to coal. The
Bnbstauce, which is of a lustrous black
color, is found on the island of Bar
badoes, and is called by the natives
"manjak." It is thought that manjak
is petrified petroleum, great quantities
of petroleum being found on the same
island. It contains only two per cent,
of water and fully twenty-soven per
cent, of solid organic matter, thus
snrpaising in utility the best asphalt
in Triuidad, in which thirty per cent,
of water is contained, and which has
been classed so far as the very finest
of fuel.
The borings which have been car
ried on for some time at the coral reef,
or atoll, of Funafuti, have now been
discontinued, a depth of 1114 feet hav
ing been reached. The cores ob
tained by the drill have been pre
served, and the material penetrated is
said to be, for the most part, a "coral
reef" rock. The upper part of the
boring consists of a mixture of sand
composed of calcareous organisms
with reef coral, but at a depth of 600
feet there was a sudden change to
hard limestone. Tha observations ot
the party engaged in the work are
awaited with considerable interest,
ss it believed they will throw consid
erable light on the much discussed
subject of the formation of coral isl
ands. Kogus Copper Coins.
The ingenuity of the counterfeiters
now appears to be chiefly devoted to
tho turning out of bogus copper aud
nickol coins, rather than those of
large denominations. According to
tho report of the United States Treas
urer for ihe last fiscal year, no less
than 69,262 pieces of this charactet
were detected last year, and they
circulated chiefly in Boston, New York
and Philadelphia.
The "Queen's Bounty."
"Queen's bounty" costs Victoria on
an average $1500 a yeor. Tho Queen,
wliun nlin nnnt tlirpn sovereigns to a
mother who had given birth to three
children forty years ago. probably did
uot foresee to what vital dimensions
the "bounty" would gnw.
100
(M
109
10 09
15 UP
WW
SOW
tUli Uo.umn, on. year......
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NOT FOR COOKING'S SAKE.
Our Mattlo is a lady,
Sut she never learned to bake;
Bhe never oared tor cocking
Just alone for cooking's sake.
80 she never oooked at all,
Lest a bit ot butter (all
On her dainty garments white,
Or her shoes so high and tight;
For she never cared to bake,
Just alone (or cooking's sake. .
Oar Hattie has a lover.
And she (oil in love, you see;
8be thought his (ace as handsome
As a (ace could ever be.
But be chanced, one sunny day,
Just in idle mood to say
(When her finger she bad burned.
And the fact be some way learned.
Though she bad not tried to bnke,
; For her ownorother's sake,)
Thnt she In baking burned It;
And be kissed the finger twice.
And Muttie thought she never
Knew a remedy so nice.
But the cunning follow said:
"You've been baklog cake or bread,
And there's naught I love to ent
Like a home-made cake, my sweet."
But Bhe had not cared to bake,
Just alone (or cooking's sake.
"Of course I am not hinting.
Just to try your tempting cake;
But I like the home-made cooking
Cooked especially (or my sake.
I have heard my mother say
That there was no other way
For a home to be complete,
And I know you think so, sweet."
But alas! she would not bake.
Even (or a lover's s ke.
Our Mattle Is a lady.
But she weeps sometimes alone,
And grieves that little wrinkles
From her eyes have outward grown;
For she did know, you seo.
That a wKe a cook must be,
And the man has wed a girl,
Though witu less ot frill and curl,
That can (ry nud boll and bake
Loves to 000k (or cooking's sake.
' Fannie Fullerton, in What to Eat.
HUMOR OF THE DAY.
We pity the mRn with a mother-in-law.
That he needs It may be true;
Dut it might be well to think ot his wife,
For she may have one, too.
"I didn't see the widow at the fun
3ral." "No; her gown fitted so badly
that she couldn't restrain her grief
enough to be present."
Miss Fondart "Jack, what do they
mean when they speak of a first-water
diamond?" Jack "One that's never
been soaked." Jewelers' Weekly.
This year should bo a bargain
For reasons you'll divine;
It looks like 1900
Marked down to '99.
Chicago Record.
Daughter "Here is Bigg, Stocks
& Co.'s great store. Let's go in."
Mother "No, no! No matter what
we ask for, they will be sure to have
it." New York Weekly.
"Certainly you won't pretend that
going to the church sewing-circle
every meeting makes a woman good!"
"iSo, but it Keeps ner irom peing
talked about." Detroit Journal.
"Then you regard marriage as a
civil contract?" asked the Sweet Youug
Thing. "No, answered the Savage
Bachelor, "it's rothor a contraction of
civility." Indianapolis Journal.
"3olomon, I fear you are forgotting
me," said a urignt eyoa gin to uer
lover the other day. "Yes, Sue," said
slow Sol, excusing himself. "I have
been for getting you these two years."
Dressmaker "So yon are not satis
fied with tho dress, madam. I fear,
then, I shall havo no more of your
work?" Customer "No, but lit
recommend you to my friends."
-Melbourne (Australia) Weekly Times.
Friend "Tho gossips have formu
lated a regular indictment againstyour
character. They say you were a ter
rible flirt while abroad. Do you plead
guilty?" American Girl "Y-e-s; tc
three counts, is ew lort wecmy.
Jones "Dear me! You say yon
often lay down the law to your wife.
How do you go about it?" Boues
"Why, all you need is firmuess! I
usually go into my study, lock the
door, aud do it over the transom."
Puck.
"I want you to give me your candid
opinion of my now book. My own
opinion is that it is a good one," wrote
a now author to an editor. To whom
the editor replied: "Yes, it has a beau
tiful cover and lovely gilt edge."
Atlanta Constitution.
nis Attorney "You'd better plead
guilty. Your punishment would be
merely a nominal fiuo." Prisoner
"That's all right; I'd rather run tha
risk of going to jail than to stand up
before everybody and acknowledge I
stole a bicycle the make of 1891."
He took it very philosophically. In
the course of time meu became phil
osophical even in love affairs. "So
you have decided that you caupot
marry mo," he said. "Sirl" sho re
plied, "I have decided nothing of the
kind. I can marry you to-morrow il
I wish. I could have married you ajy
3ay in the last six months, as you well
know. What I have decided is that
you cannot m.irry mo. "Chicago Even
ing Post.
Cllnnls In Those Days.
During the investigation the othet
nay of the mounds in Pokago Town
ship, Cass Couuty, Mich., the bones
of perhaps 100 persons were found in
the ceuter of ono mound and undei
these, separated from his companions,
were the bones of a man who iu life
must have been fully niue feet tall,
occupying a sitting position, with his
feet under him. A number of copper
bodkius or pins, from two to three
inches in length, wero fouud, and also
pius made from the bones of a wolf.
There were numerous copper hatchets,
two-edged and sharp, one of which
was wrapped iu a liueu oloth resem
bling in texture those of to-day,
Grand Bapids Democrat.
An Invention For Kallroails.
Bailroad car journals aro cooled
while the train is in motion by the
use of an Illinois mau's invention, ar
rangement being made to suspcud a
water vessel over the beoring, with a
tube leading into tho latter, to dis
charge the liauid and reduce the heat.
a, inoh, on. iiwerlian...'
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