toe FOi Ii pulliae4 every Wedaos Jay, by - J. E. WENK. C2cc& Smearbaugb. & Coa Boildlnj ILM STREET, TIOXESTA, PA. Mi - 81.QO Ie Vestr. Ko subscriptions reeelved (or a shorter period than throe months. Correspondence solicited from all parts of thf eouuiry. No noiloe will bo taken of, aoaymoua oommuoloatlon. J o in. .i, o.i. uoj iioa..l 100 Uu om inch, on month. . 1 00 On Square, one inch, three months. . S 00 One t-'qaara, one inch, one J ear..... 10 OJ Two Squares, one year ... . .... 15U) Quarter Column, one year. .. . 9)W Half Column, one year.. ...... ....... 50 00 Una Column, one year l'-W U0 Lezal advertisements tea cents per line each insertion, Alarriaires and death notices gratis. All bills for yearly advertisements collected quarterly Temporary advertisements must be paid in advance. Job work cash on deliver'. 1? VAicOi HKir' u jdjljlUAJ? VOL. XXXI. NO. 40. TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, JAN. 18, 1899. 81.00 PER ANNUM. - w '47 4 .. Railroads through tha "wild West" pat aa end to serious 'Indian oat breaks. They would be great civiliz ing and peacemaking forces in oar new possessions. , We lent 2,222,279 pounds of mail to Great Britain during the last fiscal year,, from which it would appear that we are entitled to high rank among people of Jetters. A society has been formed in Paris whose business it will be to famish a fourtoonth guest for dinner parties numbering thirteen guests. Alas, howlieriousl thoee frivoldus Parisians take thfi little amonities ot life. thlit In spite of all the attractions of football, it is still true that the im pelling motive of ycung men who seek our oolleges is a serious purpose to acquire knowledge and au ado'quate preparation for the important duties . citizenship. ' The wreck of the steamer Fortland off the coast of Massachusetts, involv ing the loss of over one hundred lives, appears to have been due primarily to willful disobedience of orders on the part of the captain of the doomed ship. It is alleged that he was ordered by his employers not to sail from Boston at the regular hour of departure, but to waty'at least two hours and consult the weather reports as to the probable duration of the furious storm the raging along the trsjp)teroas coast Instead of f ollowiug these instruction, it appears that he left port at the. usual hour, taking his vessel toward the open sea. in the face of a gale of ex traordinary violence, with the result that he lest his ship, his life and the lives of all the other persons onboard. It is a grim tragedy of the wintry seas, made doubly tragio by the probability that it might hare been averted if com mon sense and good discipline had guided its principal actor. . . The strained rotations between Nor way and Sweden bear close resem blance to those between Hungary and Austria. Norway, like Hungary, has been rapidly increasing in wealth and population and, like Hungary, she is evidently aiming at eventually com plete independence. In the meantime Norway is seeking for a separate con sular service of her own, claiming that under the present arrangement the foreign service of the Scandinavian union is practically Swedish, and Nor wegian interests suffer greatly in con sequence. To this Sweden refuses to assent, maintaining that there can be only one representation of the union abroad. The recent action of the Nor wegian storthing in adopting a rusolu tion for a flag without the emblem of the Scandinavian nnion is apparently a protest against the attitude of Swe den. Where the long dispute between these. two countries will end it is hard to say. . The good influence of King Oscar, like that of Emperor Joseph in the case of Austria and Hungary, has kept the two countries together ' in spite of jealonsy and biokering, and it may prevent dissolution of the Scan dinavian nnion. . The latest declaration as to the legal status of the boycott is found in an opinion rendered by - the Supreme Court of Michigan in a case which arose out of' a boycott of a firm of mill owners by striking nnion teamsters. The strikers picketed the mills and issued circulars establishing a boycott oh the firm. The court prefaced an injunction against the strikers with a statement of the law regulating the relations between employer and em ploye. According to the court the law protects employers in the right to employ whom they please at prices they and their employes can agree npon, al to discharge them at the -expiration of their term of service for violation of their contract. So, also. the laborers have the right to fix a prico npon their labor; and to refuse to work unless,that price is obtained. They have this right singly or in com bination. They may organize in order to improve their condition and Eecure better wages, and may use persuasion to induce men to join their organiza tion or refuse to work except for an established wage. They may present their cause to the pnblio in newspa papers or circulars in a peaceable way, and with no.attempt at coercion. This, however, marks the limit of either party's right. The injunction granted by the conrt restrained the strikers from picketing the premises and from distributing boycott circu lars which were said to embody threat ening language. Labor, as the de cision illustrates, possesses freedom of action and of combination, bnt that freedom must not be construed to in clude intimidation or coercion of others whose right to labor or employ labor is equally free. mmmm&mmmm a ?i A AT TTTTYQr.'NPC! DTTM? Qgjj) By EDWARD JOHN HART. PULSINGS were in the air and Salis bury, the capittl of Mashonaland, was in a state bor dering on panic, in the month of June, 1806. The Mashonas had risen to aid their former oppres sors, the Mata bele, and from the 15th to the 18th of June, and thence onward for many terrible davs almost every hour brought tragio tid ings. Prospectors, miners and trav elers, unsuspicious of danger, were being slaughtered in all directions. Stores and lonely houses ' were be seiged, looted and burned, after the owners were slain. Judge Vincent, the Chartered Coi panj a active administrator, co only muster 230 burghers Armed ; bat eighty noes and one Maxi tween them, to protect the 3UU tfmen and children in Salisbury. ' Mr. Dan Jndson, chief inspector of tne Chartered Company a Telegraphs and a then recently gazetted captain in the Rhodesia Horse, was one of the few men who had prophesied that the JMashonas would rebel. Though young man, he was an old pioneer had takon part in two campaigns, and knew the country well : Having friends at the Mazoe a email settlement centering round the Alice Mine nt the head of the Mazoe Valley, about twenty-seven miles from Salisbury Jndson wired to Mr. Salt house, mauager of the Goldfields of Mazoe Company, the news of the murders as it came in When, however, early on Wednes day, the 17th of June, tho inspector naa occasion to wire the Mazoe peo plo the terrible list of murders end ing "with, the blood-curdling Norton massacre, ho suggested that their women folk, at least, had better come into Salisbury, whore a strong laager was being constructed, Consequently at midnight a wagon. or large wagonette, and six mules left the telegraph office m charge of Mr. J. O. BlakiBton, Captain Judson's clerk, and Trooper Zimmerman of the .Rhodesia Horse. At nine Ue next morninqr fThnrs day, the 18th) a telegram was received from Blakiston . announcing his safo arrival, .that he had met nothing on the road, and was ready to leave with tne women as soon as they had break fasted. ' Judson then by wire, of course ordered the Mazoe telegraph office to be closed, after nrst instructing xsiaKiston, haltnouso, "anil (ho men with them to start off at once with tho ladies. The inspector passed the next few hours feverishly anticipating their arrival, On going into the office later on, he was astonished believing Mazoe to have been deserted since morning to hear the Mazoe instrument clicking, It ceased as he entered, nnd Lionten- ant Harrison, then in charge of the Salisbury Telegraph, silently handed lum this message: Blakiston, to Inspector Judson. Three men killed. Alice Mine sur rounded. Send help at once. Our only chance. Good-bye, The news from the Mazoe greatly uisiressea judge Vincent, lor he was now being harassed on all sides with the most piteous appeals for assist ance, which, for the most part, he was unable to graut. Now, when Judson asked him if nothing could bo done to assist the Mazoe people, s said ho was afraid no men could be spared, After some talk, hdwevor, the inspec tor was granted permission to take four men, and these he chose from the memuers of the Rhodesia Horse. Just before sunset, the little patrol of one officer nnd four men rode out of tho town on its forlorn errand. The pirty consisted of Captain Judson and Troopers Honey, Guyou, Godfrey King and Uendriks; bnt three miles out it was joined by Captain Stamford Brown, who was chief paymaster of the Rhodesia Horse, bnt not on its ordinary fighting strength. The patrol then pushed on, and near the Gwebi River unearthed a native, who, when challenged, fled precipi tately. With one brief halt to loosen girths and allow horses and men a hasty meal, the patrol rode on to Mount Hampdon, nnd again halted, keeping a sharp look-out the while. Here, at half-past three in the morn ing, they were joined by a reinforce ment from Salisbury, consisting of Troopers Finch, Pollett, Niebuhr, Coward, Malvaney and King Before starting, Jadson addressed his comrades, pointing out that they were about to enter what might prove a. veritable death-trap, and that there must be no thought of turning back after they had once started. Not a man of them, however, shrank from the mission; and descending the rise on which the farm stands, they crossed the Tatagora River and proceeded in single filo, Judson leading, with Cap tain Brown a close second. After covering half a mile or more, they entered a stretch of tall, dense grass, m length about 300 yards. terminating in a perfect jungle. It was an ideal spot for au ambuscade, and turning in his saddle, Jndson gave the abrupt order. "Gallop!" Still going in single file they tore along, the only sound being the thun der of the hoofs of the horses. Jndson dashodthroucrh the ex tremity of the t)tch about ten yards y oi the t)t of BrWo, thcad who was closely fol- j fx yuh of bo- lowed by the others. Then he wheeled his horse round, and raising his gun covered tho thickest clump of grass, past which Niebuhr and Pollett were then galloping. As he did so, a dozen shots rang ont in rapid suc cession; fire and suiolfe burst out of the glass not six yards from the two men, and at the same moment both of them were on the groand, horses and all. In the same instant Jadson caught sight of the natives crouching in th4 grass and fired his slug-charged barilla, felling two ot them. 'This nloufi prevented a volley being fired onioneyaud Coward, tho latter of wMom was thrown by his horse who wis frightened at the sudden dis- arge right in front of the enemy. Two horses were killed outright; ?ollett was badly shaken and Niebuhr severely wounded, his hand having been shattered by slugs. Brown, Hendriks, Coward and Honey then opened a hot fire on the enemy to en gage their attention, while, with great difficulty, Judscn pot the wounded man to his horse behind him, Pollett clambering np behind Hendriks. Then they fired a volley into the rebels at forty yards, and again started off at a gullop, Niebuhr'r wounded and useless arm hauging limply over Judson's shoulder, and saturating the front of the latter's tunio with blood. Before they bad galloped many hundred yards, a large party of the enemy was seen running parallel with them along the mountain side to cut them off. Jndson at once halted his detachment and poured volley after volley into tho enemy, tho Martinis a 300 yards range doing good execution among the natives and forcing them to retire. Ouco more the party started for ward, but this time at a gentler can ter, emptying their rifles as they rode, and keeping np a running fight. On approaching thick clumps of gras which swarmed with concealed na tives, they dislodged them by firing volleys into them as they advanced, and then rushed past the daugerous spots at a flying gallop. Judson gave orders that, in the event of any more getting wounded and the survivors being unable to carry them, they were to stick to gcther nnd endeavor to secure position on one of the kopjes, where they would bo able to hold their own, at least while the ammunition lasted. Jadson decided, and so informed his comrades, that if they were unable to discover their friends alive, they were to fight their way to the tele graph office and inform the Salisbury authorities of their plight. They would then laager np as be3t they could, the fact of their having no food and but little ammunition left forcing all to realize that such a proceeding though the only one possible uuder the circumstances could be but preliminary to certain death. Just as they were heading for the telegraph office, they heard a great shout of mingled triumph and despair, and looking round they beheld, stand ing np and waving to them from with in nn improvised laager on a small kopje near the Alice Mine, the men aud women they had fought their way so gallantly to rescue. But for that shout the patrol might have rid den past, so hidden was the laager by masses of the enemy. Through these blood-thirsty savages the relief force now shot a pathway for themselves and whilst nnder a hail of lead, but still firing volley after volley, they eatno np the slope at a gallop, and in a minute rescuers and rescued were united. Thus Dan Judson's patrol had had to fight their way in nnder a coutin uous, heavy, close-range lire from denso cover, for a distance of eight miles. liut the besieged had also i terriblo experience to relate. When on the lhnrsday it was de cided that all the Mazee people should proceed to Salisbury, a pariy of the men, ns before related, started on ahead, taking with them fourteen na tive carriers and a cart drawn bv two donkeys to carry their provisions. About 11 a. m. they left the rough laager of logs and boulders which had been constructed tho previous day, but had not gone above three miles when their carriers led them into am bush. Cass and Dickenson were done to death on the grass with as-segais- and knobkerries, wherenpon the rest turned the cart round and jumped in, but had not proceeded far when Fiiull. who was driving, was shot through tho stomach by a native concealed in the grass not four yards from him. Almost at the same mo ment one donkey was killed and the other wounded, and the men, aban doning the cart, then ran for their lives. They met the wagonette containing the three ladies and turned it back. Finally, shooting for all they were worth at hfty or sixty natives who chased them and fired as they ran, they regained the shelter of the laager. And then occurred a strango thing, which for heroism is not to be excelled n the aunnls of war. A message had to be wired to Salisbury for relief, but who in the face of certain death would volunteer to take it? Then Blakiston, who was a tele graph clerk, bnt not an operator, volunteered to take the message if Routledge, who was an operator, would accompany him to transmit it. The two meu knew it was certain death, too and yet they went. Blakiston was wounded in tho foot before he reached the tolegraph office, bnt sent his message aud his good bye. The people from the laager caught sight of them on their return, when they were some 1700 yards dis tant. They saw Blakiston fall on the road, man and "horse, riddled with bullets. Routledgft ran for cover into the bush, but was never seen again. After the arrival of the relief, the enemy for a time practically ceased fir ing, though the watchers knew they remained concealed in their vioinity. For the promised reward of $300, a singularly plucky Cope boy named Hendritz was induced to ride to Salis bury with a dispatch asking for a re inforcement of forty men and one Maxim gun. On the Gwebi Flats he met Inspec tor Nesbit of the police, with a patrol consisting of Troopers Ogilvie, Har bord, McGregor, Byron, Edmonds, Arnot, A. Nesbit, Berry, Van Staaden, Zimmerman, McGeer and Jacobs thirteen meu iu all. The inspector elected to proceed at once to tho Mazoe, without w aiting for further reinforcements, and partly on account of the darkness, and part ly owing to the enemy making sure of them on the return journey, they reached the Mazoe without fighting. The party now numbered thirty men and three women; and after the new arrivals had fed and rested their horses, all hands set about preparing for their departure. Judson had the two sides, and to an extent the back of the wagonette armored with sheet-iron, which as was observed at the time fitted so well, that it Beemod to have been made for the purpose. The mules had all been shot or lost, so six men were dismounted, and the'six troop horses inspauned in their place, though they had never been in harness before. The order of march was an advance guard of five monntcd men and eight on foot, and then a rear guard of seven mounted aud eight footmen, A start was made beforo noon. The thick bushes and kopjes were alive with thousands npon thousands of the enemy officered by experienced Matabele, and armed with Lee-Met-ford, Martinis and elephant guns, crammed with pot-legs and every vari ety of slug. Mounted natives never ceased to harass the rear guard, and pressed it so close that at one point a halt had to be made, and volley nfter volley fired to drivo them back. A few min utes afterwards Lieutenant McGeer fell, ud his horse bolted, but was plunkiiy ridden after and recaptured by Hendriks. Then two of the patrol had their horses shot dead under them. Jadson and Stamford-Brown ran back to see McGeer, nnd found him lifeless, with several bullets through his head. All this while the enemy for the most part remained hid den, the grass edging the roadside be ing from eight to nine feet high. In this dense cover the natives squatted, and took pot-shots at the patrol, who had only flashes aud puffs of smoko to aim at in return. About a mile from the Tatagora Drift, where the road winds between the foot of a large kopje and the river, annihilation seemed certain. Tha blacks were swarmed to within three yards of the road, and bullet3 seemed to rain upon the horses from every quarter. Here one of the leaders of tho team was shot through the head, bnt not killed, and kept its place. Im mediately after, however, the off-side wheeler fell mortally wounded, and while Brown and Salthonse were strug gling to cut him loose, the nenr wheeler was killed and almost fell on Salthonse. Next Jacobs and Van Staaden were shot dead, the latter falling with the side of his head' completely blown away. Arnot was cut on from his comrade, but eventually escaped. Hen driks in the advance guard was shot right through the jaws and month, and was ordered to abandon the con voy and save himself. Ogilvie was shot and severely injured; and Burton, receiving a terriblo wound right through tho face just managed to clamber into the wagon, and fell bleed ing among the horrified women. Still the agouiz.id procession forged slowly ahead, and still the four re maiuing horses painfully dragged the wagonette, blood pouring from the ncse aud month of the wounded leader. The advance guard now made a se ries of charges on the ambushes ahead, and so diverted some of tho fire from the wagonette. At tho end of that terrible valley, a ruse de guerre was attempted, the advance guard ridiug forward and cheering wildly as if they sighted advancing relief. The cheer ing was takon up by the rest and the ruse succeeded. The firiug slackened off perceptibly, and soon ceased altogether; and be fore they reached the Gwebi Rivor all pursuit was abandoned. With one halt, varied by a false alarm that the natives were again in sight, they toiled painfully over the intervening seventeen miles, reaching Salisbury Laager about ten o'clock. They received an indescribable ova tion, it being reported that all were killed. The attack on the Alice Mine and the reliefs had lasted, with but little intermission, moro than sixty hours. Inspector Nesbit possibly because he was connected with a force more nearly allied to the regular forces was given a Victoria Cross, but he was tho only member of that gallant little band whose services were recognized by government. Captain Dan Jiuh.on, ihe organizer, leader and moving spirit of the most heroic expedition in colo nial aunals despite the strenuous recommendations of Judge Vincent received nothing! But his heroic feat of arms is not likely to be forgot ten by the people of the veldt side, and will bo remembered by most Eng- tshmen who know the story. Wide World Magazine. , The elephant beetle of Venezuela is the biggest of its species. Au avorage specimen of this insect, when full grown, weighs half a pound. PUZZLE DEPARTMENT. 3(0(fJ(Q(JJ0(0v0(0( JIQtQI0IOI0tO(t Tbe eolations to these puzzles will ap pear la a saoceedlnir issae. SO. A Cross Word Enigma. My first Is In mouse, but not In rat; My second Is In don, but not In cat; My third Is In trial, also In treasure; My fourth In in health, but not In pleasura My fifth bln ear, but not In mouth; My last Is In north, but not la south; My whole Is of tho greatest worth. For It is tbe dearest name on earth. 80. A Fled Verse. Eth volloy wont saw wltho thlw pclnp sloomb, Dan eth treag slem hoeread Erar dnshwos vowo no relth realla moots, Thos hugroth thlw dolong srthed. I'elgouwoll. 31. Additions. . Example: To a prefix add fifty-nine and make diffuse. Answer, pro-lix. 1. To one hundred add a place for baking and an industrious iuscct, and make a solemn agreement. 2. To a hundred aud fifty-one add nothing, aud make one of the Muses. 3.. To one thousand add nothing and a postscript, and make kitchen utensils. 4. To six add nothing, fifty, a letter from Switzerland and a beverage, and make a flower. 5. To one-tenth of a cent add ono and nothing'and a letter from Switz erland, and make a great number. 6. To one hundred add half of a year, five hundred and one and five hundred, and make iugenius. 7. To one hundred and four add one and a hundred and a letter from Switzerland, and make the relations of citizens to the State. 8. To a college graduate add fifty and four, and make a Conservative British politician. 9. To a point of the compass add another point of the compass, one thousand, a letter from Switzerland, eleven, one hundred and nothing, and make an interesting part of our coun try. 10. To five hundred add nothing, and five hundred, and five hundred more, and the smallest Stats in the Union, and five hundred, and two let ters from Geneva, and make a cele brated writer of hymns. 11. To a letter from Switzerland add nine, and make half a dozen. 12. To fifty-one add eleven, nnd six, and a heathen goddess, aud make pertaining to lye. 33. Hidden House Fnrnlslilncs. I took my little brother on an ex cursion just over the mountains, on Friday last, and so far as my enjoy ment was concerned, I declare the trip to be decidedly a failure. Harold, as soon as we wero seated in the car, pettishly declared there was too much air, then fretted becauso there was too little room, and theu cried because he wasn't able to sit in any seat he pleased. I finally had to hand him over to Mr. Minot to manage. When taking a trip, I another time shall know better than to take Harold along. ANSWERS TO PKEVIOU3 FI ZZLES 23. A Drop Vowel Quotation Be ashamed to die until you have won some victory for humanity. 26. A Double Acrostic Primals, John Greenleaf Whittier; finals, "The Goldsmith of America." 1, Jurist; 2, oldish; 3, horologe; 4, nutmeg; S, Gonzalo; G, reveal;, 7, errand; 8, egress, 9, Nahum; 10, lazuli; 11, erect; 12, afresh; 13, fiasco; 14; Wy clif; 15, Hygeia; 16, infirm; 17, tem ple; 18, talker; 19, Illimani; 20, ex otic; 21, Ramona. 27. Five Beheadments H arbor, B-tray, t-our, s-Iate, s-pino. "8. A Diamond B ELI BLINK INK K Gibraltar Over-Fortlfled. That it is possible to fortify a place too mnch is strikingly shown in the case of Gibraltar. ijl Ever since 1713, when it was cap tured by the English, sappers and miners and engineers have been hoi lowing out fort nfter fort in the living rock to place batteries in, until to-day the military experts have suddenly awakened to the fact that they have undermined the rock itself with then burrowings, and are now trying tc think of some plan to strengthen it. So honeycombed, indeed, is it thai it is estimated that if a powferful man-of-war could get within rango and gel in a few shells the place would crum ble away like an ant-hill. Whether the idea of one rather ec centrio expert will be put tnto prac tice namely, coating the whole witl steel plates after the manner of oti ironclad is not known; but certain ii is that something will have to be done eooncr or later. Tit-Bits. The Fesnat Industry. The laetst thing in the way of trnstf is a peanut combine. Very few peo pie realize the extent of the industry. The value of tho crop is between 83, 000,000 and 80,000,000 annually, nnd about 33,000,000 is invested in clean ing establishments. Four of them nr located at Norfolk, eight at Richmond, Petersburg, Danvi':le and other placet in Virginia; three at Cincinnati, twe at St. Louis and three others iu differ ent parts of the Southwest. Tho largest establishment belongs to Gwaltucy i Bunkley, at Smithtield, Va., when they handle about twenty-five per cent, of the entire peanut crop of tho United States. All of the seventeen othei concerns have agreed to combine theii interosts so as to control the product snd increase prices and irotits, which, through competition, are now very low. SHE BURIED THE WRONG BOX. Mistake at a Fnneral Which Mode Erea (he Mourners Lanich. It is not often that a man's funeral is funny enough to make his near relatives laugh. This, however, is what happened at the funeral of Dr. Kellogg, of Ashland, Ohio. The Kel logg family is an old and respected one in town, and, aa often happens in old families of small towns, is con nected with nearly every other family in the town. Dr. Kellogg died in New York, ne was a widower, without any children, and left orders in his will for his body to be cremated and the ashes deposited in the grave of his wife at Ashland. Mrs. Patterson, a cousin, was directed to carry out this request. The death of the doctor cast a gloom over the whole big family of kinsfolk. Mrs. Patterson telegraphed directions for the cremation of the body, and watched anxiously for the arrival of the remains. One morning the ex pressman drove np with tho box. A funeral was held, and attended by Ashland in a body. The wife's grave was opened, the box deposited solemnly, and themonrners dispersed. A few days afterward Mrs. Patter son received a small zino box, about the size of the first. She was horri fied to find that this last box un doubtedly contained the ashes of her cousin, Dr. Kellogg. She knew, of conrse, at once that something else, no telling what, had been depositod iu tho cemetery in lieu of the doctor. A quiet investigation was made It was found that another Mrs. Patterson in Ashland, a sister-in-law, had sent a dress to a dye firm in New York. The box containing this dress had been deposited iu the grave of the late Mrs. Kollogg. A second and very quiet bnrying was held, at which only Mrs Patter son and the sexton were present. The story was too good to keep, aud was soon passed around. A Sagacious Hen. My sister lived on a farm in Wood bury, Conn., and raised a' great many fowls. One hen turkey was very un fortnnato with her bloods, losing them by taking them into tho tall grass some distance away. She was an ex cellent mother, but lacked judgment, Sho mourned i incerely for them, and for comfort would coax the broods of the other turkeys and hens to lollow her. One morning about 4 o clock my sister was awakeued by a pecking at her face. Springing up, she found a hen on the bed. It was the mother of a young brood of chickens. She pondered a moment and then said to her husband, "I believe that old tur key is calling Biddy's chickens away.' Going to the door, the hen in advance, there, indeed, was the childless fowl clucking to the chickens, which were toddling along after her. Tho mother hen had given the alarm, but the mys tery was how she had gained an en trance to the house. Upon looking about, it was found that a .window had been left open in au upper hall, just below which was a shed. It was not very high, but the anxious mother had flown upon the shed and from there to the window, theu, going down the stairs, which opened into the kitchen, the door of which was open, had gone across the room into tho bedroom and awakened my sister. She rescued the truant brood, gave the old turkey sound scolding, and restored them to their affectionate and natural parent. And liens are accused of being the most stupid of creatures. Correspond ence Springfield (Mjisa.) Republican. ne Didn't Sit It Out. Ho was a fradle youth and didn't daucoTall the dances, says the Cleve land Plain Dealer. "Let's sit it out," he said, to his pretty partner. "Where?" sho asked. "On the stairs." So they went up a little way and sat down. "Wh-why, what's the matter, Mr. Stackpole," cried tho fair young girl. For the young man had hastily risen and was grasping for breath. He could not reply. His face was livid; his eyes were rolled np and with one shaking hand he clawed feebly at the skirt of his Tuxedo. "What kind 'of attack is it?" sho gaspod. At this qnestion his voice came back to him. "What difference does that make?" he harshly growled. Then, without a word of apology he dashed upstairs and fluDg himself into the gentleman's room. And how was she to know that it was an ordinary carpet tack that the man had who canvased tho stairs had carelossly loft standiug'on its head? Orrcon Children Wise In Their feneration Oregon children naturally keep track of commercial aud international affairs, for their State has an extensive seaboard and intimate relations with tho wheat markets of the world. A class in geography was reciting in one of the rooms of the Central school house yesterday, when tbe matier of the interchange of commerce and natural products came np for discus sion nnd review. After referring to other countries and explaining what kind of articles were shipped to tier many, France and England, the teacher put to tho class this question; "What do we send to Spain?" A number of little bauds went up all over tho room, indicating a readi ness and desire to answer, and tho teacher told a bright-looking little girl in tho further end of the room that she might tell, and she said: "We send soldiers to Spain." "Yes, that istrno," said the teacher; "bnt can you toll what we receive ' iu return?" "We get islands," come the answer promptly from the same little girl. Portland Oregouiau. AN OLD-FASHIONED SPORT. When chestnut trees are beaten bare. And hickory leaves turn yellow. When droopinu pa paws 1111 the air With per.umo rich and mellow, We boys steal off in early night. While whimpering srrxeeh-owls shiver. And by tbt pine-knots' flickering llt;Ut Go gigctut;, down the river. Our blazing prow in crystal swims; We hear a wind-blown tinkle Ot hidden rills, and throauh the limbs Stnrs peep, nnd home lights twinkle On distant hills; and there below. Where nutless weeds are swaying, A silent cirelo widens slow. The muskrat's door betraylnc. Alert I lean along the bow. With slender gig held ready, While Ben now poles tho boat, nnd no7 Stands stlil, nnd holds her steady. The fallen leaves in squadrons pass, Ench leaf its shadow throwing, And which nre Buarlcws, which aro bas3. Is often past our knowing. The townsman, rigged with rod and reel, When summer sun's ar-j burning. With angler's art hro fills his crejl, Our rustic methods spurning. Cut eaoh to each his own delights No keener sport we're wishing Than hero to try Iu plonsnnt niijhtJ Our ancient Indian fishing. And oft again In wintry dreams, Our boyish fancies etrayiug. Glide backward down the darkling streams Where Memory's torch is playing; Again tbe steel is aimed true, And down young nerves n-quiver Tingle9 nfrest the thrill they kuew When gigging on the river. William Hervcy Woods, in l'outh's Companion. HUMOR OF THE DAY. Rose "Was ho on his knees when ha proposed?" Mary "No; but I was." Philadelphia Bulletin. "The vaue on the chnrch steeple says tho wind is East." "Well, that is pretty high authority." Boston Commercial Bulletin. Caller "Doesn't it worry you to think of your daughter on the ocean?" Old Lady "Laud sakes, no. She can swim." New York Weekly. 'Tls now tho humble married man Doth grunt and swe:ir 'ike sin. And carry out his wife's commands And her dear house plants in. Cincinnati Enquirer. First Billionaire "Make much on the deal?" Second Billionaire "No; not over a million." First Billionairo "Oh, well; every million counts." Truth. Baugs "How they applauded!" Griggs "Yes; probably the man who is speaking is telling them what intel ligent looking men they are." Boston Transcript. Bobby 'Topper, what is a respect able fortune?" Mr. Ferry "One big enough to make its owner's opinions on any subject entitled to respect." Cincinnati Enqiirer. Hoax "Jones gets a great deal of credit for the way lie keeps his family clothed." Joax "Well, they wouldn't be so nicely dressed if he didn't." Philadelphia Record. Mrs. Benham "Mother tried to commit suicide to-day ,.bnt I prevented it." Mr. Benham "I wish you'd let her have her own way about those little things." Town Topics. "No, Herbert, I am sorry, but I am sure we could not bo happy together. You know I always want my own way in everything." "But my dear girl, you could go on wanting it after wo were married." London Judy. - Thysician (looking into his auto room) "Who has been waiting the longest." Tailor (who had called to present his bill) "I have, doctor; I delivered the clothes to you three years ago." Fliegende Blaetter. "I wonder," remarked Frofessor Delver, "if the Emperor William turned np his royal nose when he saw the Mosque of Omar?" "Omar?" echoed Mrs. Delver, momentarily at a loss. "Oh, yes. He was the man who wrote tho Iliad." Chicago Tribune. "Minnio," said a mother to her naughty three-year-old danghter, what is the reason you and your lit tle brother Harrv can't got along'with- outquarrelliiig?" "I don't know," was tho reply, "unless it's because I take after you und Harry takes after papa." They had been talking of the war hero. "When he passed through our town," said the bloudo triumphantly, I kissed lum." "Unite likely," an swered the brunette, "but I never have found it necessary to take the initia tive in such matters." Chicago Even ing Post. It was with diffidenco that he roso to the sentiment. "Mr. Toastmastor and gentlemen," he said, "I nuv not reminded of a little story 7 Of course he was howled down, j palp able liar has no standing before a cul tivated Amencau audience. Detroit Journal. He (after being accepted) "And now, darling, may I just havo one kiss?" She "Will you promise never to ask me again if I lot you have just one.' lie "111 pronuso not to ask for that particular one again." She Oh, well, take it. But I don't seo why yon want to waste time asking such fool questions." Chicago News. The Itnchelors of Ancient Home. Ancient Rome was severo with its bachelors, who wero made to pay heavy fines aud were subjected to eveu worse treatment, for it is ou record that Cnmillus, after tho seige of Voili. compelled them to marry tho widows of those soldiers who had fallen iu battle. Iu tho time of Augustus mar ried men wrro preferred for fillimr lublio offices. Romans who had as mauy us three children wero exempt from tho payment of personal taxes and they were paid instead by tho bachelors. Plato condemned unmar ried men to ba fiuod, aud at Sparta they were driven nt certain times to the Temple of Hercules by the women, who chastised them in truo military tyle. In modern times women were sent over to the French settlement of 'auada uiter tho men, and iu order to compel unwilling bachelors to marry they weie heavily taxed. IP