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VOL. XXXI. NO. 16. TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 3, 1808. 81.00 PER ANNUM.
tba couatry. No noilot will be taken ol
anony moua ooaiinuolo.'Uloaa.
i
t
The 1900 census blanks will have
large Dewey and Ilobson columns.
All tbat Germany, France and Rnssin
need know touoliiug the intentions ol
the United States is that they are hon
orable. Siuce the Frauco-Prussian war ol
1870 it has been tbe custom of tbe
nations tbat win iu Var to make the
nations that lose pay the expense to
the last cent.
In 1881 Spain exacted a reveuue ol
$34,000,000 from Cuba under her ex
tortionate system of taxation; the esti
mated revenue for 1898 is 924,775,000,
but of course nothing like that amouut
cr.u be collected.
A society has been formed in Eug
land for tbo removal of "superfluous
women from tbo United Kingdom to
those parts of colonics where theii
presence is doubly welcome," aud the
Princess of Wales lias become a
patroness. Happy indeed will be tbe
land that has uo "superfluous woiuon."
On account of tbe requirements
growing out of tbo arrests of woman
and young children, mauy cities hay
found the oflieo of police matron abso
lutely indispensable. Moreover, they
have constantly increased its scope on
"the idea that whilo tbo common pro
prieties of life warrauted tbe creation
of the ofllce, it was furthermore of un
told value ou account of the reforma
tory influeuce which it exercised. Un
der proper regulations there is no rea
son why this ofllce should not become
one of tbe most effieieut in the city
Government.
Tbo London Mail says: It is not
altogether aitisfa ctory to find tbat th
all-conquering Ainericau is not only
producing as good armor as England,
but produciug it cheaper. Yet, ac
cording to a German naval periodical,
the British firms of Yiekers and Brown
were underbidden by tbe American
firms of Carnegie- and Bethlehem and
by tbe German firm of "Krupp in a
tender for tbe armor of two new Rus
sian battleships. Both American firms
were $10 per tou below the lowest
British tender. There is an unpleas
ant monotony about these failures of
Englishmen to hold their own in for
eign contracts.
Ono thing that war always does is
to bring merit speedily to the front.
Tho junior lieutenant is likely any day
to do a stroke of work that will cause
his photograph to crowd his com
manding geueral's out of tbe illustra.
ted papers. Every day develops some
new instance of daring and gallantry
in a subordinate officer. And those are
the men how destiued to quick pro
motion. As every French private
soldier in the old days was said to
carry the baton of a Marshal 61 France
in his knapsack, every man in army
or navy, no matter how humble, has
the chance to rise to any preferment
the service affords by distinguishing
himself sufficiently. ' -
Tho United States is the wealthiest
nation in tho world. This is a fact
that is often repeated, but because of
tbe natural disposition of tbe Ameri
can people to belittle themselves,
which has arisen by a kind of renc.
tiou from the old disposition to brag
and bluster, itsocms to be universally
forgotten. The great English statis
tician, Mulhall, has completed tables
showing the wealth of tbe nations of
the world iu 1895 as follows (pounds
being converted iuto dollars at the
rate of $5 per pound) :
Uultod States 81, 750,000,000
Grout Britain - 69,303,000,000
France 47,060,000,000
Gormnny 40,200,000.000
Russia 32,125,000,000
Austria 22,560,000,000
Italy...'. 15,800,000,000
Spain 11,000.000,000
These figures include everything,
such as farms, railways, houses and
merchandise.
There is oue thing which specially
frets and teases soldiers in the field.
It is the ping of tbe sharpshooter's
bullet. It constitutes one of the un
canny elements of a war. That ounce
of lead comes from a source tbat
cannot be discovered. It may come
at tho most unexpected moment aud
it causes a nervous tension which no
one cau appreciate unless he has had
the experience. We stay-at-homes
imagine that the thick of the fight is
what causes solicitude, but "it is not
so. In the thick of the fight a sol
dier will be as cool as a piece of ice
and go about his duty as indifferent to
dunger as a machine. But when he
is iu camp aud tbe sharpshooter lies
in ambush and may try his skill at
any moment tbo soldier is naturally
restless and excited. We should not
,lorget these things when wo begin to
pile up the gratitude which is due to
the brave fellows at tbe front.
THE WAR KINC.
If you're waking cnll me early call me early, Mollv, dear;
To-morrow'll be the liveliest day ot all the war-like year;
Of all the war-like year, Molly, for me tbe happiest day,
For I'm to enlist tor the war, Molly, aud pocket the Bret month's pay! -
Last year they wore a orown of thorns, when cotton fell so low;
Beneath the hawthorn, near the hedge, I saw my llvin' go;
An' it gave me a ease o the blues, Molly; but now they have passed awny,
For I'm to cullst for the war, Molly, and pocket the drat month's payl
Bay to tbe landlord a kind word, and let him be content;
There's many a dollar coming yet to pay the bill for rent;
And Bhorten my clothes for William the ones I have cast away
For I'm to enlist for the war, Molly, and pocket the Brut month's poyl -
All night I'm bnlf-awake, Molly; I tbluk of the coming dawn,
How I'll hnnr the ring of the dollars as I draw my uniform onl
"The wild March marigold shines like lire In swamps and hollows gray,"
Out not as bright as I'll ghlne, Molly, wheu I pocket tho first month's pay!
Bo, If you're waking call my early call me early. Molly, dear;
To-morrow'll be tho liveliest day of all the war-like year;
Of all the war-like year, Mollv; the maddest, merriest day.
For I'm to enlist for tbe war, Molly, and pocket tbe first month's ray! -
Frank L. Htanton.
1 BILLY RILEY AND THE CIRCUS 1
Dy FHANCE9 ALLEN,
HE row of children
clung with toes and
fingers to the back
back of Miss Dix
on's desk; around
her crowded a ring
three deep. She
enjoyed this morning sociable, with
bright faces peering between tbe mugs
of lilacs, aud tbe light, swaying pres
sure about her shoulders; but thrifty
of time, she was acoountiug for gaps
in yesterday's attendance.
Patsy McGaw had been obliged to
"mind his baby;" Jimmy Fox pleaded
a "sore t'roat;" Jimmy Nelson, shy of
his audience',' gave evasive auswers.
Jimmy was a dear little boy, but his
one-sided dimple wheeled him off the
straight path so often that Miss Dixou
cross-questioned htm searcbiugly.
"Oh!" he cried at last, his faco
flashing. "No'in, didu't run away
from school, if - that's what you're
ttrivin' at."
There was no mistaking his faco.
Jimmy was innocent for once, aud
Miss Dixon flushed as quickly as he
had donei
"I'm sure yon didu't, Jimmy. Billy
Riley, I suppose yon have some ex
cellent reason for your absenco?"
"Er-r-r " stammered Billy, trying
to wind himself up to the point of
speech. Here Diuny Phaleu upset
oue mug of lilacs, and iu the scramble
to save the register, Billy's attempt ut
speech was lost.
"Did have an excellent reason. I'd
told her if she'd waited," muttered
Billy, going to his seat.
Billy was cross tbat morning. He
rubbed out his drawing so furiously as
to make a hole in the paper. In mar
bles he broke the rules of the game
and quarrellod with the other boys un
til they put him out of the ring. They
resented the more this fit of lawless
ness and ill-temper from good-natured
Billy.
"Didu't tell no lie. Sho never ast
me. She just supposed," ho was say
ing whilo Miss 'Dixou explained tbe
lesson.
"Sho never thought I'd ruu away.
She wouldn't think where I went wos
any excuse. She'd thiukit was worst
of all. Where did sho sa tbe next
lessou was? It's just as she said, I
had an excellent reason, but if I told
her she wouldn't think so. I'm goin'
to get a week ahead iu my cipherin'."
So Billy turned himself into a mul
tiplying machine with a phonographic
attachment, which ground out, at in
tervals, "It was au excellent reason."
Weduesday was "poetical extract"
day, and in the afternoon the children
hunted out note-books to copy tbe
lines written upon the black-board.
"To-day I have given you a grown
up selection," said Miss Dixou, and
the teacher read foui lines from Em
erson, ending:
"When Duty whispers low, Thou must,
Tbe youth replies, I can!"
"Now toll me what you make of it.
Eddio, what does it mean?" she said.
Eddie scowled near-sigbtedly and
twisted one supple leg about the other.
"It moans," ho said, slowly, "like
when your mother wants you to wash
your hands when they aren't dirty,
but you do it."
The children took Eddie's interpre
tation sympathetically.aud the teacher,
too much in earnest to smile, replied,
"I'm Borry yon mind washing so
much, Eddie, but you ha. part of the
idea."
The lines reminded the other chil
dren of "the soldier who went to the
war," of "tbe boy stood on tbo burn
ing dock what was his other name?"
of "tbe Dutch boy at tbe dike," and
other heroes.
"It's liko that red book of yourn.all
full of golden deeds," said Johnny
Mack.
So in childish fashion they caught
the thought of the lines, and wheu
thoy were learned by heart the teacher
told a "live" story of a brave messen-gor-boy,
who had refused to give up
an important key to burglars who
threatened to kill him.
"Thank you, thank you for the
story!" and the children inarchad out
in a charming frame of mine. To bo
sure, there floated np from the yard:
When Duty whispers low. Thou must,
The youth replies, I ca-a-n't,"
with an expostulating whine which
every ono recognized.
"They are such monkeys, I wonder
if it is all lost ou them," thought Miss
Dixon, planning to-morrow's work.
Billy Riley had not gouo out. He
now pulled his books all out on his
desk and piled them np again.
"There wasn't anything about run
ning away to circuses and not tellin',"
he was saying to himself, "but some
how those- stories make things look
different s'ide of them. What will she
uo? oue never none mucu or any
thing ti anybody, but nobody never
done nothing very bad to find out.
I'm not a baby boy. Guess I can stan'
it."
When Miss Dixon looked up Billy
was figuring as if it were necessary to
get through tbe arithmetic that night.
"Yon here, Billy?"
"Yes'ui." Billy was pale, but ho
went forward bravely. "Y-you said
you s'posed I had an excellent r-rea-son
to be absent." '
"Yes; didu't you?"
"Yes'm."
"What was it?"
"W-wentto the circus."
"With your parents' leave?"
"Haven't auy parents. Aunt's the
boss of me."
"Did she give you leave?"
"N-no'm. Rau away."
"This is very serious. At least,you
are sorry, Billy?"
"N-no'm," said Billy, firmly, look
ing straight at her. "I ain't. It had
to be dono. I'm 'leven years old an'
never weut to a cirens in my life be
fore. All tho boys have been. Every
o-oauy-ooy in the school nas been
most of om two or three times. My
aunt wouldn't ever give me the money,
au' what I earn she k-koepsto buy my
cioiues. iiout a week ago, cotniu'
home from pasture, the circus-poster
man drove by mo.
"I see his horse's girth was hangin'
V I hollered, 'Your girth's broke,'
and ho jumped out aud I give him a
string to nieud it 'n' some winter
greous, V he wrote on a card, 'Admit
William Riley and lady,' V said tbat
would take me inside the circus.
Knew I'd never get another chance V
I went, and I oiu't sorry.-"
Now Miss Dixon was a firm dis
ciplinarian, unaccustomed to culprits
who looked her in the eye. She was
used to little boys who prostrated
their heads aud shed copious tears,
with perhaps the tail of an inverted
eye watching her countenance from
under cover.
She looked Billy over. He was
neatly if cheaply dressed. Probably
the aunt who was "boss of him" did
her best, yet his thin, square face
gave au impression of having often
been set grimly to bear disappoint
ment alone. Billy could not read her
face as he waited, glad that the thing
was done and bracing himself for the
worst.
At last sho spoke. "Billy, I see
how you felt, and if you had come
frankly and told me all this I think I
could have arranged to let you go
without running away."
Billy looked blank. He knew Miss
Dixon's word.
"Why, I n-never thought you'd I
d-didn't know 1 didn't s'pose you'd
be so r-r-reasouable about it."
"Billy, we teachers are glad to be
as 'reasonable' as you uureasonable
little boys will let us be."
"Didu't mean to sass you. Perhaps
I m-meant some other word. I
d-didn't think you'd take it tbat way,
and maybe I ain't very glad I went,
after all."
"I'll tell you how I came to under
stand, Billy. I once ran away to the
circus myself."
Billy sat down on the top of a desk.
"I did. No, I rode away, hiddeu
by the 'buffalo' which draped the old
buggy-seat. I crawled out half-
smothered, hoping my brothers would
take me iuto the tent. It wasn't con
sidered proper for girls to go then,
and although they were sorry, they
sent me home ou a market-wagon
Somehow, I have uever been, and I'm
much more thau eleven."
Billy was full of sympathy. "If
I'd been your brother now what a
pity! My card said, 'And lady.'
'T wouldn't have cost you a cent."
"But I should not have liked to rnu
away now aud leave my school in the
lurch. Did you have as good a time
as you expected?"
"Yes'm, it was splendid. The
ponies was great, and the elephant
and the b-baby elephant. And you
ought to seen them ride. But I was
sorry I had to run away I thought I
had to when you thought I was such
a good boy. And I didn't like bring
ing down the av'rige attendance. Now
number eight is the highest.
"It troubles me more to nave our
average standard of trustworthiness
lowered. I did trust you, Billy."
"And I saw some of the boys there
with their folks, but I didu't want to
talk about it afterward, as I thought
I should. I knew tbevwouldn t tell
"I am glad you told me; but of courso
you would.
"I felt mean not to, 'specially after
them stories. And you were real "
" 'Reasonable,' Billy? But could
any oue havo reasonably expected
that little Dutch boy to stay alone in
the cold and dark all night, with his
finger in the dike? And could any
quo have reasonably blamed the little
messenger-boy if he had given up the
key? Would it have been just as well
if they had done no more than could
be reasonably expected?"
"I sb-shouldn't think it would,"
said Billy; "and just going to school
wasn't anything extra to do, either. I
think I acted mean. What shall I do
to make it up?"
"What can you do?"
"Er I might make np the time
after school. I'm ahead cipherin',
and jography is review, and reading
and language and those things don't
count."
"Oh! Don't they?"
"I might learn a piece of poetry, I
suppose, or," brightening, "the flower-beds
n-need weeding dreadfully."
Miss Dixou was convinced of Billy's
sincerity. "You cannot make up a
thing like tbat, Billy. You can only
learn to do better next time. That is
aK I am going to ask you to do. What
have you learned?"
"To go and tell you when it seemi
as if things ought to be done that
h-ba.ln't ought to."
"Aud if I am unreasonable?"
"Not to do 'em," said Billy,
promptly.
"Very well. If yon like to work in
tho garden just to help the school 1
shall be glad."
"I will," said Billy.
"And your aunt!"
"I'll tell her. She Bays when I got
a p-punishiu' at school I'll get one at
home; and if I don't get one she'll
give me two."
"You may tell her that I think you
can be trusted next time, and ask bet
to excuse you."
"N-no'm, ehe won't. She's not that
kind of a lady."
But Miss Dixon resolved to add
Billy's aunt to her list of friends im
mediately, and did so, very much to
his interest. ,
Billy worked away at the flower
garden till it blossomed as the petu
nia. And one morning, wheu the cir
cus posters had beeu replaced by
others as flaming as they had been,
Miss Dixon found a manila paper par
cel iu her desk.
InBide the parcel was a seed cata
logue envelope, inside this a plain en
velope, inside this an embossed val
entine envelope, and inside the em
bossed valentine envelope was a tick
et to the greatest show on earth,
from her "friend and puple, Wm.
J. Riley." Youth's Companion.
Mow Biddy Catches Bats.
John Hamilton has a Plymouth Rock
hen which has developed into quite a
rat killer. The trait first manifested
itself some weeks ago when one of the
men about the stable found a rat's nest
and threw the little rodents into the
yard. The heu spoken about was no
ticed eating t he young rats, apparently
with a great deal of relish.
Since theu she has been seen on sev
eral occasions under a manger, where
there was a great rat hole. She would
stay there for hours at a time. Some
of the men about tbe place thought the
hen was "broody," but one of tbo
drivers insisted upon it tbat she was
watching for rats. This statement was
laughed at, but the other day it was
proved beyond a doubt.
Mr, Hamilton was standiug at the
back door of his office, and hoard a
great squeaking in the stable. He went
to the door and just then the Plymouth
Rock hen came from under the manger
where the rathole is, and iu her bill
was a rat easily one-third grown.
The fowl held the rodent in her beak
suspended by a hind foot. The rat
was squirming aud twisting at a great
rate. Some of the other fowls tried to
get at the captive, but the rat catcher
was too quick for them. She ran as
fast as she could, all the time shaking
her head from side to side. The rat
was trying to bite aud would probably
have done bo if tbe hen had not shaken
it so violently. Finally, some of the
men drove the other chickens away,
and tbe Plymouth Rock was allowed to
do as she pleased. She released her
hold ou the rat, and wheu it tried to
get away pounced upon it and picked
out Its eyes. After that a few hard
blows with the beak and the rat was
as dead as could be. Wilmington
(Del.) Mprning News.
O'Hrlen of the Nary.
One of the torpedo boats to be con
structed under the provisions of the
last naval appropriation bill will be
called the O'Brien. The boat is to be
named after Jeremiah O'Brien who
won the first American naval victory.
Cooper's "History of the United
States Navy" tells all about the daring
young Irishman. The fight of O'Brien
is described by Cooper as the "Lex
ingtou of the seas," and the historian
says: "It was one purely of private
adventure."
When the news of the battle of Lex
ington reached Machias, Me., on May
9, 1775, the Margaretta, an armed
schooner in the service of the Crown,
was lying there with two sloops under
her convoy, loading with lumber for
the British Government. The Mar
garetta's captain became suspicious
and sailed down the bay. Thirty-five
men took charge of one of the sloops
and started after the Margaretta.
They elected O'Brien captain. The
sloop captured the Margaretta and
took her guns on board. The British
authorities at Halifax sent two cruisers
to capture O'Brien, 'but he turned the
tables, took both of them, and carried
his prizes to Watertown, Me. For
his daring and enterprise O'Brien was
made a Captain of Marine of the col
ony of Massachusetts. New York
Sun.
Out Output ol freefone Stones.
Iu 1897, while this country's gold
production exceeded 910,000,000, the
output of precious stones reached only
the modest figure of $130,675. The
principal items of this total were:
Turquoise, $55,000; sapphire, $25,000;
quartz crystal. $12,000; tourmaline,
$9025; gold quartz, $5000.
THE MERRY SIDE OF LIFE.
STORIES TOLD BY THE FUNNY MEN
OF THE PRESS.
Unreasoning Reason Occupied Unpleas
ant Reflection The Other Kind Hub
by's Salary Forcing an Issue In the
Negative II U Mistake, Etc., Etc.
She said to him, berlovor:
"I would not hold you no.
If n"ce tbe dream seemed over,
11 once you wished to go.
"You're free at any season,
At any moment free."
"But that is just the reason
You bold me fast," said bo.'
Unpleasant Reflection.
MissPassay "I dread toHhink of
my fortieth birthday."
Miss Pert "Why? Did something
unpleasant happen then?" Brooklyn
Life.
In the Negative.
Customer "Do you suppose you
can take a good picture of me?"
Photographer "I shall have to an
swer you in the negative, sir." Pick-Me-Up.
Occupied.
Snodgrass "The world has a place
for everybody. "
Micawber "Yes; the only trouble
is there's generally somebody else in
it." Chicago News.
Tho Other Kind.
"Pauline, are you one of Fashion's
slaves?"
"Not much; I'm the slave of a man
who won't let me follow the fashions
at oil." Detroit Free Press.
Forcing an Issue.
Ho "We must devise some plan
for getting your father's consent to
our marriage."
She "Well, wo er might put
bur heads together." Brooklyn Life.
Ills Mistake.
"That politician is a 'has been,'
isn't he?" remarked the observer.
"No," replied the captious friend,
"he isn't even that. He's merely a
'used-to-think-he-was.' " Washing
ton Star.
The Parson's Rich Wife.
Mrs. Greene "They must think a
good deal of your husband's comfort
to give him a three months' vacation."
The Parson's Wife "Or a good
deal of their own comfort." Boston
Transcript.
Hubby's Salary.
Jones-Brown "How much does
your husband earn a week, Mrs.
Brown-Smith?"
Mrs. Brown-Smith "Oh, anywhere
from $10 to $25 less than we spend."
Brooklyn Life.
The Artists' Error.
"Father, are generals bravo men?"
asked Johnny of his father.
"Yes, my son, as a rule," was tho
answer.
"Theu why do you artists make pic
tures of 'em standing on a hill three
miles away, looking ata battle through
an opera glass?"
Rather Pointed.
Smith "Every time I call I find
you with a pen iu your baud. You
must bo very fond of writing."
Jones "Oh, yes; regular pen
bolder, as it were."
Smith "Isn't it wonderful how
mauy sticks aro converted into pen
holders?" Chicago News.
Inconvenience of lining Poor.
Yabsley "There is no show for the
poor man in this country."
Mndgo "Sinco when did you
change your views?"
Yabsley "Since tbat footpad
pounded me over the head for not
having more than half a dollar." In
dianapolis Journal.
Complimenting Him.
"I must give you credit for having
remarkably light bread," said tho
housewife.
"We try to keep it so," repliod the
baker.
"And you succeed. It is so light
that it goes up in price a great deal
easier than it ever goes down."
Washington Star.
One nn Her.
"At last I have discovered it,"
grinned the young mau at tbe theatre,
before his best girl had yet time to re
move her hat. "You Bee beforo you
au air ship."
"Pardou me, but I see nothing of
the kind."
"Then look at the stage. It has
wings aud flies." Detroit Freo Press.
A Dear Girl's Conscience.
"Of course," said Maud, thought
fully, "if somebody steals something
from you and then gives it right back
again, that doesn't make you a re
ceiver of stolen goods, does it?"
"I shouldn't think so," roplied
Mamie. "What makes you ask?"
"Cholly Chuggius stole a kiss from
me the other evening." Washington
Star.
Comforts of Travel.
Professional Guide (to palace-car
porter) "I havo an English Lord iu
charge, and I want him to get a good
impression of the comforts of travel iu
this country. Here's five dollars."
Porter "Yes, sah. Do you waut
me to gib him extra attention, sir?"
Guide "Great Scott, no! I waut
vou to keep away from him." New
York Weekly.
An Illustration.
Teacher "Thomas, will you tell mo
what a conjunction is, and compose a
sontence containing a conjunction?"
Thomas (after long and solemn re
flection) "A conjunction is a word
connecting anything, such as, 'The
horse is hitched to tho fence by his
halter.' Halter is a conjunction be
cause it connects the horse aud the
fence!" Harper's Bazar.
SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL. '
Straight hairs are nearly cylindri
cal; curly hairs are elliptical or flat.
The seacoast Hue of the globe is
computed to be about 136,000 miles.
It is said that the castor oil plant it
abhorred by nearly all members of the
auimal kingdom.
The waters of the Grand Falls ot
Labrador have excavated a chasm
thirty miles long.
Alcohol is being used with mantle
lamps to illuminate parts of Berlin's
park, the Thiergartcu.
An army physician says that he has
discovered that pure olive oil taken
internally will cure enteric fever.
The relative sizo of tbe earth.'aa
compared with the sun, is, approxi
mately, that of a grain of sand to an
orange.
In a recent test of floor material the
most durable turned out to be a tile
made of rubber. An English earthen
tile came next.
The shoe factories use 1,000,000
kaugaroo skins yearly. Australians
have begun to raise aud breed kanga
roos as they would sheep.
Liquid (oil) fuel, iu combination
with coal, is used on tbirty-seveu en
gines of the Great Eastern Railway, in
England, including fifteen expresses.
The Maledive Archipelago, west of
Ceylon, embraces 14,000 cornl islands,
few of which are more thau six feet
above the level of the ocean, and only
175 of which are inhabited.
Krypton will have as its density
forty, with a minimum density of 22. 51.
"Krypton" is the name assigned to
the now gas. The word means "hid
deu" or "concealed," and its scientific
symbol will be"Kr."
Bow Russia Is Preparing For War.
At NikolsKoye, about seventy miles
from the Pacific, I stopped for the
night. It is a great military centre,
and always has been recognized as a
strong strategic point. There are
fortifications, ruined and dilapidated,
out upon the prairie near the town,
which have been pronounced to be the
handiwork of Tamerlane or Genghis
Khan.
Suddenly, with a bump and a jolt,
we came abruptly to a standstill, and
I followed the izvozchik's whip to
where he was pointing to tbe plaiu
below. It was white with tents.
How many there wore staudiug there
I shall never kuow, as tbe eveuing
closed in, and wheu I had counted a
thousand I lost my count in tbe dusk;
but there were still many, very mauy,
more. It was a summer camp, aud
there were anywhere from 15,000 to
20,000 soldiers lying here perdu,
where their presence was as little
suspected, where they were as
secluded, as if somewhere in the heart
of Africa. I afterwards learned tbat
this was but one of the threo in
trouched camps around Nikolskoyo,
and not the largest. The men were
leadiug the life of soldiers ou active
service, aud were ready for uioiniizu
lion, to tho last button. Stephen
Bonsai, in Harper s Magazine.
The Saviors of Kansas and Nebraska.
The hens are said to have saved
Nebraska. From the stations in the
interior of tho State were shipped
thousands of dozons of eggs every
week. The money recoived for them
was about the only clear cash that
same into tbe household, aud kopt
the children fit for school and the wife
iu presentable clothes. In Kansas
the humble cow was more in evidence
Scattered over the plains are tho
creameries, to which every morning
wends a procession of farm wagons,
oach containing a dozen or more high
tin cans filled with milk from the
farms. Oue county has for six years
received from the creameries $250,000
annually in monthly paymouts. It
has beeu the salvation of tho settlers.
Others have done nearly as well, and
the annual value of tho milk products
has been from $4,500,000 to $5,000,
000. This, added to the help of the
hen and the returns of the swine yard,
has been the resource upon which
many a family has depended to tide over
the lean years. Harper's Magazine.
The Many Uses of the Banana.
Immense fortunes have beeu made
out of tbe banaua business. Reve
nues do not accrue alone from the sale
of the fruit, for tbo leaves are usod
for packing; tbo juico, being strong iu
tannin, makes an indelible ink and
shoe blacking, the wax found on tbe
underside of the leaves is a valuable
article of commerce; manila hemp is
made from the stems, and of this hemp
are made mats, plaited work aud luce
handkerchiefs of the finest texture;
moreover, the banana is grouud iuto
banana flour. The fruit to be sold for
dessert is ripened by tbe dry warmth
of flaring gas jets iu the storago places
in which it is kept, and immense care
has to be taken to prevent softening
or overripeuiug. The island of Ja
maica yields great crops of this useful
aud money-making fruit. Invention.
Government Mines In Prussia.
Tho Prussian Government owns
and works seventeen collieries, eight
lignite mines, fourteen iron mines,
five metalliferous mines other thau
iro'u and three rock Bait mines, to
gether with five irou works aud eigjit
works for smelting tho other metals,
Bix salt works and fivo quarries, which
have an output of a total valuo of
more thau $30,000,000 yearly. Bo
sides the above, tbo Prussian State
owns one colliery, that of Ibbenbuhren,
iu tbe Osnabruck district of West
phalia; the collieries of Deistor aud
Osterwald, iu the Clatisthal district,
and half the Obunkirchen colliery iu
the same district. New York World.
Duration of Life.
The average duration of human life
in European countries is greatest iu
Sweden and Norway, aud lowest iu
Italy and Austria.
THE URCHIN'S TALE.
Above tbe sound of the truffle that roared
In the neighborhood ot tho bulletin board
Came the lisping tones of a seven-year-old,
And tbe man gave hood to the tale he told;
For tbe man was a man ot a martial air,
Though white was the drift of his snowy
hair;
And bis eyes grew bright and be smiled for
Joy
At the warlike words ot tbe llttlo boy,
Who spoke to bis comrade, sma'l, freckle
faced, With a Cuban flag on bis tattored waist.
"What stock," said tbo vet, "when grim
war's alarms
Break out in the speech ot tbe babes in
arms!
"When tbe dlsoourseot cblldron Is talk ot
guns
And heroes are prnlsed by the little ones.
"Av, what a stockl What a sturdy stock!
What lighting chips of the fighting block!"
The seven-year-old by the bulletin board
Heard none of all this or, bearing, ig.
nored
Cut went right on with bis tale ot strife
"Ue battery licked 'em, you betcber life!
"De battery done it; ah, don't forget
bat battery was onto its Job, you bet.
"De udder Captain was sand clear t'roo.
But be was 'fraid o1 duin cannon balls,
too.
"Ho cheered up bis gang, you know but
nit;
Dey tried deir best, but dey couldn't bit.
"An den" and tbo old man's eyes grew
moist,
And deep in bis loyal heart be rejoiced;
And bo bent bis head and be proudly
smiled
At tbe epln sung by a little child,
And his pulses throbbed and bis being
thrilled
Then be gravely thought of the maimed
and killed;
For be bad fought, and he knew no fun's
Provoked by a charge on tbe enemy's guns.
lie fancied tbe carnage tbe death and
smoke
Of the battery charge thon the wee boy
spoke:
"Debattory it did all o' de work
Me brudder pitched an' wuz caught by
Burke."
Chicago Record.
HUMOR OF THt DAY.
She "Wheu you marriod me you
said you were well off." He "I was,
but I didn't know it." Tit-Bits.
"Were you a guest at the hotel while
you were away, Blodgett?" "Guest?
Not much. I paid cash." Chicago
Record.
"Say, what would you do if you had
a skeleton in your closet ?" "The best
thing to do is to make no bones of it."
Indianapolis Journal.
Aworkmau was repairing a steeplo
directly above the big clock aud strange
to say he charged his employers up
with working over timo.
Chemist (to battered female, who is
covered with scratches) "The cat, I
suppose?" Battered Female "No.
Another lydy." Punch.
"What's tho matter, Little Dick?"
"Say.Mr. Higby, why don't you bring
my sister more candy an' not so many
roses?" Chicago Record.
McDougal "Hoot, man! ye'll soon
bo better." McMiuus "It's not the
seeckness I'm minding; it's tbe awful
waste. I paid atteenpanco for tbat
decnuer." Pick-Me-Up.
Boyjoe "Why nro yon consulting
tho dictionary? I thought you knew
how to spell." Chin ii "I do, I am
not looking for information, but for
corroboration." Tit-Bits.
Carrie "Did John come up very
close to .yon wheu he proposed?"
May "Well, I hope you dou't thiuk
he went across the street and shouted
his love over to me." Standard.
Mistress "The servants seem to
know all about the mortgage on the
house." Master "Yes; they'd nat
urally look np the title before they
took possession." Detroit Journal.
Keedick "Young Browne added
the 'o' to his namo after he inherited
his uncle'B big fortune." Fosdick
"That's quite right. Rich people are
entitled to more ease thau poor peo
ple." "My dog is almost as intelligent as
I am," remarked Squildig. "Are you
going to have him shot, or will you
try to give him away?" asked Me
Swilligeu. rittsburg Chronicle Tel
graph. "I understaud from a careful peru
sal of history," said a young fellow
with au arid upper lip, "tbat in 1861
the young fellows went to war, and I
thiuk it's the old men's turn to go this
time." Denver Timos.
Ou tho brink of a creek iu Ireland
therois or used to be a little stone
containing a carving of this inscrip
tion, intended to help travelers:
"When this stone is out of sight, it is
not safe to ford tho river." Tit-Bits.
"Every morning on tho way to
school," said tbe little miss, "the
boys catch me and kiss me." "Why
don't you run from them?" asked her
father. "Because," replied the small
edition of Eve, "maybe they wouldn't
chase me." Chicago Post.
B,"So you are going to marry Dump
er, Grace?" laughed her best chum.
"Pardon my levity, b it he's so short
and you so tall and stately." "You're
wrong, as you ofieu are. A mau cuu't
bo called short when he's worth over a
milliou." Detroit Free Press.
"So you think it absolutely neces
sary to havo bicycle shoes on when
you ride your wheel, do you?" asked
tho Cheerful Idiot. "Of course," said
tho youngest boarder. "Then, would
your wear horseshoes when you rode
a horse?" Indianapolis Journal.
Her Father "I am afraid, sir, tbat
my daughter can never be happy with
mau who can be engaged to her a
month without giving her a ring."
The Aspirant "Sir, I am afraid I cau
never be happy with a girl whose en
gagement to me will not induce jewel
ers to trust uie." Jewelers' Weekly.
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