-1 (Trie Forest Republican Ii published every Wndn s lay, by J. E. WEMK. Office In Smearbaugh & Co.'i Building ELM STREET, TIONF.8TA, TA. Terma, DI.DOPoi Year, No subscriptions received tor a ihorter period than throe months. Correspondence sollnlts I from All parts of Die country. No notice will bo taken of anonymous cotnmunloaliom. RATES OF ADVERTISING! One Square, one ln?h, one insertion . .1 10) One Hquare one inch, one month . ,, 8 00 One Square, one inch, throe months. . f OneHquare, one inch, one year 10 (M Two Hquares, one year 1 ,"' Quarter Column, one year 8 W Balf Column, one year. S'l IM One Column, one year 101 IMJ Leeai advertisements too cents per line each insertion. MarriAges and deith notice! gratis. All bills for yearly advertisom'.'nts collected quarterly Temporary advertisements must be paid in advance. Job work cash on delivery. ICAN VOL. XXIX. NO. 18. TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, AUG. 19, 189G. S1.00 PER ANNUM. REPUBL EST Tbo American Anti-vivisection So ciety has declared that hydrophobia is ft myth. mmmammmmmm Over 2,0(10,000 people in the Unitod States hiivo taken out regular lifo in-r-uranco policies, whioh nro now in forco. A nice old lody put $1700 into a Maine savings bank in 1872. Tho other Jay the administrator drew out 85140.02. But what good did that do tho nice old lady? How much more important Taris is than any otbor French city is shown by their populations. Paris has about 2,500,000 inhabitant and of tho two cities that ennio nearest her Lyons and I Marseilles neither has quite C00,000. Georgia has nlready boeome tho peach orchard of the world. Within a few years tho number of peach trees in the Stoto has grown until tho oroli nrds count their troe no longer by hundreds and thousands but by hun dreds of thousands. What's one's meat poisoncth an other. Because Town Clerk Collins, of North Anson, Mo., hoarkenod to Cupid's hints and eloped, other poople in North Anson who wish marriugo lieonsos have got to wait for a special town meeting to name a new olerk. Ono of tho leading papers of Mad rid is authority for the statement that Spain has squandered no loss than 819,321,000 in her effort tosnbdtio the Cubans. Kiuco the outbreak of tho present revoluiou sho has Bent upon this fruitless errand of subjugation as many as forty generals, 562 chiefs, 47(58 captains and lieutenants, 112, 5(50 corporals and soldiers, 143 cannons, 150,000 rilles, COOO bayonets, 23,000 cases of canister shot, G1,878,3G8 cart ridges and 72,32(5 kilograms of pow der. Notwithstanding this enormous expenditure of money and eupplios, the cause of Spain has gained but lit tlo advantage over that of Cuba during the eighteen months. "The Cubans nro making a brave fight," oxolaims the Atlanta Constitution. Lady Burton's will is a curious document. She gave orders that after Lor death a doctor should pioroo hor heart with a needle; sho was then to be eubalmod in a curious way and placod by tho sido of hor husband ia tho tent at Mortluko. She had bought A vault, howevor, and left direotions that in case a revolution should broak out in England that aimed at the desecration of tho dead, her body and her husband's shall be placed in the vault. The strangest provision, how ever, in view of the loyal manner in which bis wife stood by Sir Richard Burton during his lifotimo, is that by whioh Mr. Coote, Secretary of the Na tional Vigilance Sooioty, the English Anthony Comstook, is made a literary trustee for Bnrton's works, and is directed not to allow an indecent or coarse word to bo issued in connection with the publication of his books. It was by Mr. Coote'B advice that she burned her husband's "Scented Garden," fcr which she had beon of fered 830,000, and another work for which 88000 was to bo paid. The number of foreign estates await' ing American inheritors does not di minish, though the inboritors never enter in and possess thorn, remarks the New York Tribune. They vanish on approach like the end of a rain bow showing where the pot of gold is buried. The last ono to turn up is appraised at 80,000,000, and is claimed by representatives of the Holt family, resident hero. It dates back about two hundred years, the nest egg having been laid by a Lord Chiof Justice of the reigns of William III. and Queen Anne. It lay in the pickle vat of chancery something like one hundred and fifty years, and then heirs-at-law began to appear, but the only thing certainly known of thorn is that none of them ever got anything, and nobody has, yet succeeded in lo cating any of the property. Still the present American cluimants are cer tain it is there, and their lawyer as sures them that they have a good case. They will, no doubt, bo called upon to advance some money to carry on in vestigations, and when thut is spent they will be asked for more. So long as enough is forthcoming to keep the cogs and sprockets of the acting attor ney well oiled, the property will con tinue to present an alluring aspect, but after thut it will go into tho eclipse of chuuoory ugoiu, and remain occulted fur uuotker hundred years or to. I'erhnps another crop of fools may turu up by tbut time ready for nuother crab at the Fortnuatus purbu of the old Chief Justice, and if to, unless things ehunge materially in the iutcrv.il, they will find plenty of lawyers to encourage them. LOSSES AND GAINS. Though God has vollod Ills purpose From our unseeing eyes, . Ho bids us hope unceasing Tho weakling as tho wine. lie mnkne tho glowing future To blossom from the Now; Of ills He eoinirth blessings, Although wo know not how. And In the flory furnaco Of sorrow and of loss, His alohemy divorces Truo motiil from tho Jross. As who would oan tho pleasure, Tbo verdant vale's delights, Must first, with steps untiring, Asoend tho mountain heights. Mayhap tostnigglo onward, With bruised and blooding feet, Ere half the weary journey Before him bo complete. So rises Man, tho pilgrim, On lessons bought with pain, Aud learns there Is no losing Without a greater gain. -Frauk Futuam, Id Chicago Tlrnos-IIerald M TWO DUELS. inuuuti I am per haps the least quarrelsome man in the world, it has been my fate to fight no loss than two duels. One I confess to have sought; the other was thrust upon me ; both occurred during tbo nine tios of this nineteenth century. In oaoh I roceived some bodily hurt, The first of my duols took place in a smoll town or Houtnorn France. I was i resident there for the winter, hod t tiny bachelor villa, and (through for mer acquaintance with the place) was on pretty intimate terms with a good many of my neighbors. There was an English element in the place, but the French of course predominated, and it was with the Frenchmen I usually found inysolf. Tho man with whom I fought was a Frovenoal, born close by. He was a big, Btragsrlinir fellow. lean, and with a bright bird's eye that was alwayB glittering on you. He was gentleman undoubtedly, had been educated in Marseilles, and had never wandered fifty miles from the Riviera Boost. He wasprobably the most narrow-minded man that ever lived, and, on diet of books and Anglophobe news papers, ho had imbibed a blind and poisonous hatred for the British Na tion that was unique in its complete' ness. His namo was D'Arblay, and be oalled himself my friend. This was the funny thing about the man. lio cultivated the society of Englishmen, and individually (1 think) he liked thorn. IIe was eternally running down pernao Albion, but no body took much notico of that. The Englishman who lives abroad is so en tiroly oonlldent about the superiority ol nis own island that no doosu t ofton break out in patriotio vein. It isn't lis way. Besides, ho finds that one ihort pitying smiio often servos his purpose better than a whole volume af talk. Now, for two years I had endured D'Arblaj's roviliugs of my native land with no more forcible retort than a lorios of those pitying smiles ; and I think in tho end ho bogau to hate me, for one day, without warning, ho started on a fresh topio whioh he must have known was caioulatod to wound me deeply. He commenced to talk mild evil about some one I cared for very much indeed, and that in a club bouso before the ordinary mixed gathering of other men. I warnod him once, twice, and the third time ; aud ho always said that ho moaut no harm, and turned oil what I had said with easy badinage and continued his theme. But at last I saw, or thought I taw, his motive, and a hot anger boiled up in me. "D'Arblay," 1 said, "if you want to fight, Bay bo like a man. But drop talking about that girl or I shall throw this inkstand at you bead." "M'siou," he retorted, "I dispute yonr right to be the oensor of my con versation. Tho 'lady in question " I threw the inkstand. The glass missed him, bat the black Quid spurted over his face, and the technicul insult bad beon given and reoeived. He bowed formally and loft the club house, I spoke to a couple of my friends and followed bis example. Later be appointed two seconds, und they con suitea, wuu mine; ana a time was fixed for the meeting, and swords were chosen as the weapons. D'Arblay was an average swordsman. 1 niul seen nun practise with a maitre d'escrime, and has gauged bis powers pretty well. For myself I knew of the art of fenoing absolutely nothing whatever; and, when everything was snugly arranged (or the duel. thought of this fuct with something more tnan annoyance. 1 particularly did not want to be killed, beoause well, because a certain lady bad promised to marry me within a short time, aud I well, I did not want to disappoint her. And there was no bucking out of the duel. One could afford to laugh at such a meeting in England; but in France 'it is another matter, i.veu the English winter res idonts would have looked askance at me if I tried to disentangle myself, Moreover, tbore was another thing, more dangerous than wounds or death. and mat was jriaicuio. a man may put up with being Killed, but be can not endure being laughed at. So I made up my mind that, if D'Arblay aid not disable me nrst, i would leave my mark on him in a way there was no mistaking. Mind, I did not want to kill the fellow, only I did not in tend to be mixed up iu an affair whioh the newspapers could define as "another bloodness encounter" and dismiss, with jeering purugrugh. I t N So, to sum no, I went on the field determined on forcing a serious, fight, and a good deal fearing lest I myself should be the one to sutler. Wo drove out to tbo placo of meet ing in the early morning, with a keen minstrel blowing which chilled ono to the bone. The others arrived simul taneously, Tbore was quite a congre gation ot ns; four seconds, two doo tors, and the principals. But D'Arb lay, being a Frenchman, liked the orowd, and I had to bow to the eti quette of the country. No politeness could havo been more punotilious than ours, and none more icy. Wo two principals stripped to shirt and trousers, and I stood on the frost rimmod grass in my stocking feet. D'Arblay was opposito me, smiling grimly. We saluted oue an other with the bare, glittoriDg rapiers, and a second took up position behind each of us, standing ready with a walking stick to knock up the blades at tho least sign of a foul stroke. At least so I was warned. To myself I was wondering what a "foul stroke" might be, so ignorant was I of the very elements of fenoing. But I said noth ing about this, and, when D'Arblay crossed blades with mine, I engaged him with whirling fury. The blue steel flashed and stabbed a thousand ciroles in the chill morning air, and a pang of fear gripped me by the heart. I seemed to feel his blado passing through me in a hundred places. Death appeared inevitable, Every second I marvelled at finding myself alive. To myselt I aoeepted a mortal wound as inevitable ; but 1 lusted to get my own blado through D'Arblay's body before I was killed. I could hardly soe him. Our panting breath bung gray under the cold morning sun, so that we fought in a clammy mist. J lunged aud passadoed, barely guard ing at all, fighting on the offensive only, through sheer greed of getting in my blow before I was bore de com bat. Then, before I knew what was hap pening, the duel ended. I was con scious of a feeling somewhere or other of a soar as with a hot iron. I under stood that it meant I was wounded, and dully wondered where, though without being able to locate the hurt, I saw the walkingjstioks of the seconds uprise to beat down our weapons, and at the same moment 1 board L Arblay utter a shriek of pain. A heavy oone clashed down on my blade, and I drew back nearly burst for want of breath. These things take long to tell, but the whole of them happened within one tick of a olook. The surgeons ruohod up to ns with lint and bandages. Blood was run ning from my fingers onto the rapier's hilt. D'Arblay had scored my right forearm with a shallow gash a dozen inches long. He himself was in a worse case; I had ran him through the shoulder. My seconds tried to hold me back, but I was too warmed up to caro muoh for the etiquette of tho French duello then. I went to where D'Arblay lay In the surgeon's bauds, with blood pat tering from my fingers on to the grass. 'Al Biou will apologize, 1 hope? I may mention that the lady is engaged to me." v "I didn't know it," said my oppo nent. "Why didn't you toll me bo- fore? My dear follow, 1 am most abominably sorry for having chattered. You have given me a pig of a stab, and that ought .to settle accounts be tween us. Will you oome and break fast with me when we're both tied up?" One of the seconds murmured at this informality. Sir," 1 said, "if you nave auything to complain of, may I bear it?" "Monsieur, he replied, "1 think we had better consider this affair as ended now." The other duel in which I took part was none of my peeking. It happened last year in Florida, where my wile and I were spending the winter, and was thrust upon me in a manner little ehort of murderous. The beginning was in this wise ; I detected a man cheating at cards. I was not playiug myself, bat the cheat ing was douo to swindle a fellow who was mv friend, aud, because I saw it, beyond, shadow of donbt, I called out to him to stop play. Of course, there was a row, and if the sharper had not been in a minority of one there might well have been shooting. But, as it was, the thing was uttorly flagrant ; iudeed, tho man himself did not at tempt to deny it, and he went away scattering nothing more dangerous than venomous wordy threats. We were left triumphant possessors of the fiold, and I waxed pedantio to my friend ovor tho danger of playing games of chanoe for the coin of the realm with casual hotel acquaintances. Three days later I went off into the Everglades alligator shooting, and for deer also, if I could come across any. Now what the spot was like will not be spoken of here in detail. Sufficient to mention that a:nong otber things l came upon an orchid which I imagined to be new, aud all thoughts ol shoot iug were for the time submerged be neath the ardor of the collector. I laid down my rifle (a Remington .400) against the stem of a magnolia tree and began to feast my eyes upon the trails of banging blossoms. I suppose I must have dawdled there a full hour, sketching, measuring, tuk ing notes, culling specimens, when of a sudden something went wisp pant the top of my head, and then, close to, sounded the noisy crack of a heavy ride. By a sort of useless instinct, the first thing I did was to start backward aud to duok my head ; the next to sture wiidly around tue. A glance showed beyond question where the bullet hnd come from. Down a glade of live ouke, not sixty yards away, man was busily engaged iu slipping a fresh cartridge into the breech of a ride, which hud gray smoko wreaths still crawling slowly from its muzzlo It was the fellow I hud exposed for i cheating at curds. As I gazed, he finished loading and sharply raised his weapon. I turned and ran like a frightened dog, zigzag ging in ay course to oonfuse his aim, and making for the magnolia tree. There I snatched up my own rifle, and darted behind tbo trunk. I stopped and listenod. Not a sound was to be hoard which rose above the warm hum of the insects and the other never ceasing noises of tho forost. I oould not doubt that the man was watching me and waiting for bis next opportune ity to pick me off. My gorge rose at the thought of him. Brute I If he could fire a sitting shot at an unsus pecting man, I knew what I had to ex pect, and what I must do if my own life was to be saved. I bad to depend on myself. In that solitude the next human creature might be twenty miles away. Thnd I A bullet bad struck the tree, and the noise of the shot oame close upon its heols, I swung out from behind the trunk and lifted my rifle, when an other shot whistled out from beneath the live oaks, and I was poorer by the loss of an ear lobe. My own bullet rattled harmlessly among the tree twigs, and I strode back to shelter, raging and bleeding. The passion nf murdor burned in me then like a torch. The heat of the day seemed to have passed completely away. The perspiration which stood on my body turned cold as an ice douche. Never before had my thoughts gushed up with such clearness and strength. It was a duel to the death between me and the sharper, and he had drawn first blood, and I had got to win. Tbe words seemed floating in the hot air before me "Kill I kill I kill I" I had reloaded the Remington, and stood with ears strained to catch the slightest sound whioh told of my en emy's moving. Till that moment I had supposed his rifle was a repeater. Now another idea came to me. There had been two reports; one short and sharp, the otber heavier and more noisy. Of course, the thing was clear. He bad fired a revolver shot first, to draw me from my oover ; had dropped the smaller weapon the moment he pulled trigger ; and had fired on me with the rifle directly I emerged from oover. The fiendish ounning of tbe man made my hate for him glow in me like a draught of raw spirits. All idea ot fairness (if indeed such bad ever occurred to me) was com pletely swept away by that time. I would fight him by bis own methods. Tbe only question was one of means. As matters stood, I lay ensoonsed be hind the stem of the magnolia, and, if I stepped out of its shelter, I should have to take his lire before 1 could get in my own. As a snap shot I was very consoious of my own defioienoies; from observation I had a high estimate of his skill. But a brain working at the presiure which mine was put to then yields np unexpected fruits; and when the idea did at lost come to me I could have sung for very joy. But there was too much danger in it to increase the risks unnecessarily. I slung my rifle by its strap aoross my shoulder, and turned round and commenoed to climb the magnolia. The stem had been split by light ning, or I could not have got up with out my hands being seen ronnd the sides, and, as it was, the climb to the first branch was desperately hard ; but I had the strength of ten men in me then, and the silent wilyness of a Seminole, and I gained the cover ot the foliage without having made a slip or oraoked a twig. With the caution of a lynx I made my way np tbe ladder of branches, going higher and higher till there was barely one layer of the dark green shining loaves botween me and the burning sky above ; and then I looked about me till I found a steady Beat ; and then I unslung the Remington from my shoulders. I brushed the rustling ourtain of leaves softly aside with the muzzle and peered out. My enemy was on his old ground, stand ing beneath the live oaks with his rifle at the ready. Some indefinable sus picion must have got bold of him, for at that moment he looked np. The reports of the two rifles rang np into the heated air simultaneously, but mine was the better aim. His bullet whistled through the durk green leaves a foot from my head; mine broke bis right elbow joint. I reloaded and hailed him. There was a pool of black water on the nearer side of tho live oaks, and the snout and eyebrows of an alligater showed upon the surface like two knots of dead wood. "Take your ride," I said, "and that revolver aud throw them into the water." He hesitated, nursing his wounded arm in the palm of his hand, and glar ing at me like a fiend. "Quick I" I said. "If yon take time to think twice more I'll shoot you dead." He picked up the weapons one by one and then dropped them into the water with sullen splashes. . The rep tiles in the pool, frightened by tho noise, sank down to the mud below, where they luy. "Now," I said, "go!" and he went, and I watched until he was out of sight among tho tree trunks ana the saw grass. Then I climbed down and gathered my orchids und went home by another way, koepiug a very sharp lookout. I trusted little to thut man's chivalry. I have &t en another fellow cheat at curds since then, but that was in South America, aud I did not feel culled upon to interfere. Two duels have been quito enough for mo. Chunibers's Journal. Eleven hundred aud thirty-one per sons have entered for the preliminary examinations to Yulo University; 728 of these are for the aoii lotuio depart meut aud 40 ) fur the Sheffield Suieu tilio School. THE MEttU'K SIDE OF LIFE. 8T0RIK3 THAT ARE TOLD BT TUB . FUWNT MEN OF THE PRESS. A Convenient Place Too Had Knew What Was Comlog In Confidence i' Quite Necessary, Ktc, Etc. In the days of Hiawatha, When the' Injun wasn't fighting, Then he used to put tho hatohut 'Neath the oartli or 'neath a rockj If the Injun lived to-day, I Think that when this wor was over He would hie him to his uncle Aud would put the ax in hock. 1 . New York World. "' TOO BAD. A. Wheeler "Doesn't he look well?" T. Ires (in disgust) "Yes ; ho's ono of those cranks who won't ride a bieyole." Puck. KNEW WnAT WAS COMINrt. Cnmso "Rickotts is about to chango his business." Cawker "Where is ho going to open his bicycle store?" IN CONFIDENCE. Friend "What are your reasons for selling?" Suburbanite "Malaria and the lawn mower." ruck. HE IiOOKED TO THE RIflHT AND IjEFT. Miss Wheeler "Isn't the scenery beautiful along that road?" Rydor "Very I I'm using court plaster and arnica on account of that scenery. Puck. THE PBOPER COtTBSE. Assistant "Wasn't it Harvey who discovered the circnlation of tho blood?" Editor (absently) "I don't know. Didn't be mako an affidavit?" Puck. QUITE NECESSARY. Cobwigger "Didn't you think it rather foolish for her to ubk you if her hat was on straight?" j Merritt "No. It was on a rai train, and we had just come out u v long tunnel." TUB OIF! HOItSE. "Pretty soon, I suppose," mur mured thecx-cowboy, "we'll even havo to chango our proverbs." "Which ono, for instanoe?" "We'll have to say that one should not look a gift bicycle in tho spokes." AN IftnUALITE. Jack "There goes a man who is knewn in nearly every city in tbo United States, yet I don't believe ho has a friend in the whole world." Madge "Who is he?" j Jaok "A basoball umpire." Nor ristown Herald. A BMAIJj BEGINNING, BCT "I am poor," ho said ; "it would ho many years beforo I could give my wifo a yacht." "Well," answered the girl of 'Ol; "couldn't yon commtuou with a little smock?" i And so it came to pass. MRssrnE. Invention Enthusiast "I - under stand that Kcely has constructed a cylinder that will stand a pressure of 3500 pouuds to the square inch." Pretty Girl (who hasn't been hugged for a year) "Huh 1 I don't think that's muoh?" New York iVcekly. AN EXt'EKT. First Boarder "I understand that tho landlady is to take a trip to tho West." ! Second Boarder "Is that so? If the train would stop loner enough at the stations, she could give tho rail way - restaurant people some groat points." I A CULTIVATED TASTE. , Mr. Moth "What a horrible flavor of moth balls this sucque has I" Mro. Moth "Dear mo, Algernon, yon are positively disgusting. Dou't you know thai a liking for carbolic acid and tar is the best evidence that one has moved in good society an I -inquired a cultivated taste?" Ciu.'iii nati Enquirer. HOIST BY HIS OWH rETBD. , Casey (confidentially, to tho fore man) "Oi've bin ai'ther watou.u' Kerrigan for th' lusht two hours, an' devil a shtroko uv wur-ruk hoz ho done in all thot toimo." Foreman "Bo bivins! Kerrigan wuz just afther oomin' t' mo wit' tu' same information about yorsilf. Ye, are botj discharged, for wutchiu' iu etid uv wur-rkiu'." Puck. 1118 COIN TIIEOnY. "rop," said Willie, "what's a gold bug?" i "That, my son, is what they call the men who want gold money." "And I suppose a silver-bug is a man who wants silver mouov?" "That's it exactly." "Well, say, pop I'm ouly a little feller, aud am Mitisfic 1 with being a nickel-bug. Uimmeone, will jer?" Harper's Bazar. A COMIC DCEr.. Reddit "I see tho French htve de vised a rather novel regulation for their dueling code, which is expected to do away entirely with bloodxbed." Wellnow "What is it? Have them fight simply with expletives, or use brass knuckles tit oue hundred feet apart?" Reddit "Xo ; it provides for the uso of bullet-proof veets." Wellnow "It seems that if tho au tagouists can wcartlioe things they'll be making a field of honor out of every four-acre lot iu Frauce. " Reddit "Ob ! but tbevebUnrjfjr the speotatcrs." SCIENTIFIC AND ISDCSTKUU A pound of phosphorus heads 1,000,. 000 matches. The latent application of asbestos in electricity is called the olectrotherm, and is used in hospitals, in place of the old-fashioned hot-water bottle. It has been noted that there baa been no drought in Southern Calt- fornir in those districts in which tbo eucalyptus trees have been extensively planted. Permission has booa asked tho au thorities of tho City of Moxioo to al low the chango from mule power to olectrioity on the streot railroads with in the city. On the eastern coast of Irelnnd it rains on an average of 208 days in the year, in England about 150 days, at Kazan about ninety days and in Si beria only sixty days. The elephant is commonly supposed to bo a slow, clumsy fellow, but when excited or frightened can attain a speed of twenty miles an hour and can keep it np for a half a day. No parental care ever falls to the lot of a single member of the insect tribe. In general, the eggs of an in sect are destined to be hatched long after the parents are dead. A motor tricycle attracted ranch at tention at a recent display of autocars in London. The inventor is an Ameri can. The car is seated for four per sons and weighs only 400 pounds. Compressed hot water is said to bo a remarkably cheap motive power, and the New York Central authorities are thinking of running fast trains between New York and Albany by its means. Professor Charles Stewart told the the British Royal Institution the other day that there are 334,000 hairs on the human body. He said that be would not be particular to a hair or two one way or the other, but the above number was the average, for he bad counted them. Two English bacteriologists oon slude that an average of 1500 microbes .must bo inhalod into tbe nose every bour, while in London the numbor )St often reaoh 14,000. The organ- ms are caugut oy tne nose and passoa to tha digestive organs, which in health destroy them. Long distance telephones have been placed in tho smallest Swiss villages, making it possible to oommunicate from one end to the other of tho coun try on instruments kept in perfect re pair, and on whioh one can hear dis tinctly. The fee varies from two to eight cents a message. Electric light ing from water power has been iutro dvced in even small places. Preaching Still at Nincly-Ono. It is an unusual thing, indeed, for a minister to be in active service at tho ripe old ago of ninoty-one, and it is a more unusual thing for a minister to continue without salary as pastor of one ohargo for fifty-five years with still no definite time for retirement therefrom to look forward to. There is such a minister in Montgomery County, however in the person of Eldor Jonathan Van Clove, pastor of tho Indian Creek Baptist Church. The venerable Jonathan Van Clove is tbo recognized patriarch ol his do nomination, and throughout the cen tral States his name is a household word in all Primitive Baptist families. He has been a great traveling preaoher, always at his own expense, and while "oveiy third Sunday" finds him in his own pilpit, every othor Sunday finds him in soane other pulpit, perhaps hundreds ot miles from his Lome. Although ninety-one years old, his form is erect, his eye clear aud spark ling, his voice resouaut aud ringing and his mind and memory unimpaired. Ho remembers with distinctness every incident of his youth, and, what is unusual with old men, he perfectly romembors all iucidents aud circum stances of his later years. He reasons as ho always reasoned, and iu tha revolution of church an 1 creed he clings to the religious tenets of his early ministry. He has tho hearing of a man of sixty, tho tireless energy of a youth of thirty. Indianapolis News. A Remarkable Counterfeiter, Walter N. Owofis, a farmer of Okla homa, was sontencod on Friday, at Wichita, Kan., to servo a term in the penitentiary at Leavonworth for coun terfeiting. The case, to some extent, is a remarkablo one. Previous to his arrest he had always borne a good reputation. Two years ago ho was a juror in the United States Court here and tried a counterfeiter. Duriug the progress of tho trial counterfeiters' tools were exhibited aud evidence in troduced showing bow false moneys were coined. Owens examined the tools closely and listened to the evi dence attentively. After the conclu sion of tho trial be went home and made counterfeiting tools himself aud proceeded to work. Owing to his good repututiou he made aud passed a great deal of spurious money before he was detected, New Orleans Times Democrat. Mule birds Lead tho Way. Whea birds are inigiatiu; the male; usually precede the females. The robins, for instance, which uro seen curly iu the year are almost invaria bly males, which apparently traveled on before their mutes. The female bird follow, perhaps because they are not such powerlul flyers, aud uUo, porhap.', because they like to take their time uud gossip with oue au other. In the full the male birds leuve first the old ones while the females travel along together with their youug, solioitious for their welfure, uud still traiuing them utter the iu.sliioi' -' mother birds. New York Suu. BLOWS. The giant powder In the blast Is blowing up the bouMorsi Tho maiden with pneumatlo sloovj Is blowing up her shoulders. Tho baker to the kitchen maid Is Wowing up his crumpets; The milkman in the lower hall Is blowing up tho trumpets. The gentle zephyr from the SouIU Is blowing the narcissus; The cook who thinks sho knows It "11 Is blowing up the "missus." The father, down upon his knot, Is blowing up the tires; Tho daughter In her bloomer suit, Is blowing up tbe tires. Yonkcrs Statesman. nunon of the day. Handsome is as handsome does, and handsomo often does as handsome pleases. We may not be able to teach an old dog new tricks, but lots of ns learn a great deal while trying. Puck. "T ts bettor to laugh than be sighing" Iu poetry sounds very nine; But laughing will not pay the coalman And so it won't out any ice. Don't let your troubles blind you to the fact that your neighbor's sym pathy is two-thirds curiosity. Atchi son Globe. The wealth of our language is shown by the fact that "hang it np" and "chalk it down" moan precisely the same thing. Miss Huggins "My father is very good at reading faces." Mr. KiBsani "Then I hod hotter not print any kisses there." "One swallow may not make a sum mer," but it may have occurred to you that one grasshopper makes more than a dozen springs. The more delighted a girl is when a young man calls on her, tbe longer she stays np stairs to primp up before she comes down. The South-West. A man doesn't fully realize the re sponsibilities of life until he is called upon to open a can of salmon with a pair of scissors. The South-West. Doctor "If you bind salt pork on your face it will cure the toothache." Patient "But, dootor, won't it give me pork chops?" Detroit Free Press. As to some of our statesmen, it is doubtful whether they look the oour ngo of their opinions, or the oourago to admit that they haven't any opinions. Puck. ( Jim Senn "Why do they call money the 'long greou?'" Joo Cose "Negatively, 1 suppose; beoause without it you are short and blue."--Philadelphia North American. Proprietor "Whore is the book keeper?" Oflice Boy "He isn't in. His wife sent him word that the baby was asleep, and he's gone home to see what it looks like." Standard. "Whoro nro you going, my protty maid?" "Going a-walkiug, kind Bir," she said. "May I go with you, my pretty mnid?" "I don't walk with a stick, kind sir," sho said. Wrinkto. Hoax "What! You buying a bi cycle? I thought you detested them. Joax "So I Wo, but I'vo boon run over long enough. Now I'm going to havo my revenge." Philadelphia Rocord. He "When I nm married I'll mako a practioo of coming down to dinner every evening in a dress suit." She "And after you've been married awhile, I've no doubt, you'll como down to breakfast in one." Truth. Invontion Euthusiaht "I under stand that Kecly has constructed a cylinder that will stand o pressure of 8500 pouuds to the sqnaro inch." Protty Girl (who hasn't been hugged for a year) "Huh I I dou't think,... that's much." New York Weekly. "Your son, I believe, made name experiments while at college?" "Yes, he discovered what he calls his 'soion tilio paradox.' " "What is the nature of it?" "He succeeded iu demon strating thut debts are expanded by contracting them." Washington Times. President Rox "But your account is already overdrawn, bo I don't see how we can honor your further de mauds." Sho "But I sco lots of poople depositing! why cau't you give mo some of tnoirs? They've already paid in much more than I've drawn out." Standurd. Sho t'iur;iit lit in. A young married woman was look ing at a vacaut house on I'acillo ave nue tbe other day with a view to rent ing, when sho beard a noise in one of the upper rooms. She went up to see what it was, and was almost sure that sho saw a man dodge into a closet and close the door after him. Her first im pulse was to run aud scream, but see ing tbe key iu the door she walkod slowly across the room aud turned the key. Then she ran for a policeman. It was in the morning and she could Uud none, so went home to lunoh and forgot all about her prisoner till evon iug. Theu she hunted up an officer aud wont to tho house. Whon tho ;closct door was oponed the half suffocated owner ot the house tumbled out. He bad gone to the hcuseto .do some little chores, and was ohaugiug his clothes wheu his toilet wus interrupted by tho yonnft lady's unexpected appearauce, aud he was forood to seek a refuge iu tho closet. Sun Frauoisco Post. Hits I.iltlo (iiil t'ati Iron. James Gardner, a worker in the iron mines at Bessemer, Mich., has a three-year-old daughter who has ac quired a tuste for iron ore, which she eats with avidity. Wheu kept from the mines tho scrupos her father's shoes aud eats tho scrapings with rel ish. Doctors do not understand tho case. Despite h, r strange diet tho child U healthy and briyht. i-