Til FOREST REPUBLICAN
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J. K. WENK.
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On. Hq tiara, on. Inch, on. year ...... HM
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Logs! aTrttnwiti to, cnti par Uam
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Marrta. and death notloe. frmtSn.
All bill, foryaarly adrm-tlwrnrnt. eiiPaafaa
TJBLICAN
VOL. XXVI. NO. 50. TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, APRIL 4, 1894. S1.00 PER ANNUM.
quarterly, lamporary iaTWBMiwm
B. paid la adranoa,
Job work eaah oa dallvery.
RlR"P
Ja h ,,JL .JA-
Marriage are proportionately nbout
twice as numerous in nmnll Western
citioa aa. in New York.
Tlic Turin Sinclo says that England
ct aa though it owned the world,
wiiil that it is nbout time for an ex
planation. An English newspaper asked for
opinion on the wont popular name
for a girl and n boy. "Harold" and
"Dorothy" got most votes.
The scarlet tanagor, by many con
sidcrod tho most beautiful bird in
America," has within a fow years be
oomo bo rare thnt it is seldom seen.
The milliners have almost exterminat
ed them.
One of tho curioNitios of trado Is
shown in the foot that a large Nor
wegian steamship has boon chartered
to carry thirteen hundred tons of pa
per pulp to Fleetwood, England, from
a wood pulp factory in Maine. For
tho year ending Deeoinbcr 31, 1893,
we imported 55,504 tons of wood pulp.
Au ironical but timely application
of a phrase away from its oustomary
significance is the command "hold np
ygnr hands," directed by tho city
police to tramps who attempt to abide
ill El Paso, Texas, relates the Atlanta
Constitution. This town of agreeable
winter temperature, lying a it docs
on the southern railroad route from
California, was becoming overrun, as
other Texas towns have becD, by the
ruffian mendicants that for months
have been thronging eastward. The
evil abatod when the rule was put iu
force. Now whenever a tramp applies
for relief he is compelled to hold up
his hands. If the palms do not fur
nish evidence that ho is a genuine work
ingman he is promptly set to cleaning
the streets. As the methods for en
forcing ordinances in El Paso empha
size prompitude with plonty of force
and fireworks it is not strange that
tramps bold aloof from that city and
bestow their unwelcome visitations on
. other places.
Women's colleges, in sundry places,
says the Philadelphia Fnblio Ledgor,
have broadened out wonderfully since
the early days of Vassar. Not to speak
of Hniith and Tufts in Massachusetts,
Mr. Henry F. Durant, by his ex
traordinary gift of fl, 000,000, mad
possible the establishment of Wellesley
College. In addition to this princely
gift, Boston University, with its mil-
lions, so broadened its acope that it
opened its doors to women, being en
ablod to do so by the generosity of
Jacob Sleeper. Iu Baltimore the
liberality of Mr. Goucher provided tho
women's college ; also, Miss Mary Gar
rett founded a preparatory school,
which is worth everything in pre
liminary education ; while Johns Hop
kins has granted entrauoe to some ot
iU courses. For I'hiladelphia, Dr.
Taylor established in the suburb of
Bryn Mawr a splendid oollogu at an
expenditure of SI. 000,000. In New
Orleans exists tho Sophie Newcymb
College, iu cuunectiou with Tulane
University. Ht. Louis has opened the
doors ot tho Washington University,
and women members stand ou the
aarne footing with men, thanks to Johu
1. Hockcfcltcr.iu the great University
of Chicago.
- " .
For aj-vcral years poaf -prmldv
, for several year to come, predicts tho
New York Independent, the nows
which will tell most in the world's fu
ture history is that which comes from
Africa. Duriug tho past week there
has been au important new chapter
added to this history. A French
military force has entered Timbuctoo
in the very interior aud most inac
cessible part of. the South Sahara
Neighborhood. Frauce proposes to
eoutrol the whole of this territory,
aud she reaches Timbuctoo from tho
north by way of Algeria and from tho
west by way of Senegal. Timbuctoo
has been an almost unknown city,
visited very rarely, aud generally by
Europeaus only in disguise. The iu
- formation is too meagre its yet for up
to understand ttie full meaning of this
occupation. So far as we know the
force is a small one, aud a small force
' could have uo ehauoe in case of oppo
sition. We have uo question that
Frauce intends to make J imbuetoo a
treat centre for its influence and
power, uor that Northwest Africa will
be finally under French ooutrol. It is
often said, aud truly said, that France
has shown no great aptitude for oolo;
uil enterprises owing to a lack of sur
plus populatiou. But she has put
Algeria uuder civilized conditions,
and Frenchmen may multiply more
rapidly in the colonies than they do
iu their owu country. The partition
- of Africa will afford a great outlet for
Europera population and enterprise
aud will have a, great influence og the
world.
Since 1810 the world's production
of meat has increased fifty-seven per
cent., that of grain 420 per cent.
The Chicago Evening Tost says that
"Chicago policemen do less work for
more pay than any other olasa of the
unemployed."
Professor Riley, the bug man of tho
Acrricnltural Department, says that
some bugs have all the five senses
that man has, and one or two more.
An illustration of the severity of the
times Is found by the New York Inde
pendent in the fact that two physician?
lately advertised in a daily paper, of
fering $5000 to a man who would sub
mit to an experimental surgical opera
tion involving some risk. One
hundred and forty-two answers were
recoivod.
After a careful calculation of the
risks from all possible data the Lon
don life insuranoe companies have
fixed tho "war risks" to be paid extra
by their patrons ordered on active
service at 12.16 per $500. That is to
say, the British soldier has but about
one chance in 250 more of dying o
active sorvico, than if ho staid quietly
at home in London.
Chicago is worried over the fact
that so many of its streets and avenues
have the same names, notes the New
Orleans Pioayune. Ono hundred and
sixty-five names have to do dnty for
720 streets, and the result is not
wholly satisfactory. It has twelvo
Centre streets, seven Ashland . ave
nues, seven Chestnut streets, ten Lin
den streets, thirteen Oak streets, thir
teen Park streets and fourteen Wash
ington streets, besides a number
which are less reduplicated.
i
A few years ago, relates the New
Orleans Pioayune, the Mikado of
Japan determined to ask his people to
help him govern thorn, and with a
flourish of trumpets called for an loo
tion and organized parliament. Ite
reports from that country say that
now he is having a hard time to man
age the popular representatives. Not
long ago the conservative majority ex
pelled the President, Hoshi, because
he insisted in keeping faith with for
eign powers. Thon Foreign Minister
Mitau made them an address, showing
that the course of the majority would
result in losing everything that Japan
had gained in thirty years, but they
would not listen to reason, and the
session was suspended for ten days. It
is said that the doings of the Japanes.
parliament would furnish first rate ma
terial for a comio opera. The minis
ters attend the sessions with orders for
the suspension of parliament ready
signed and sealed 1y the Emperor in
their pockets, and when the body be
comes unruly the orders are produced,
and the session suspended for ten days
or a fortnight. The majority of the
members are intensely Japanese, op
posed to everything foreign, and they
have no idoa of parliamentary pro
ceedure. It is said that tho Mikado
has started a movement whioh is sure
to give him a good deal of trouble ul
timately. The annual ropoit of fires of tho
Board of Firo Underwriters, of New
York City, oontains some interesting
statistical information. Several tables
set forth the number of alarms and
the amount of losses for thirty-nine
years up to April 30, 1803. From
these may be gathered an idoa of the
growing efficiency of the Fire Depart
ment, as well aa the rate of increase
of tires due to the growth of the city.
The insuranoe money paid iu 1855
in adjustment of losses was 33.87 per
. cont. of tho amount placed. For the
succeeding j oars until 1870, when the
paid department was adopted, this
percentage was not reduced in fact,
rose in the last few years of thif
period. But since, aifd including
1890, there has been a constant al
though not steady reduction. The first
year the paid firemen took hold it war
22.23 per cent. In the year ending
April 30, 1893, it .was 13.10 per cent.,
the lowest in all but two years in the
history of the city. This is telling
testimony to the value of the paid de
partment. In 1815 there were 355 fire
alarms, iu 1893 29t0, a steady ascent,
excepting the years 1863 and 1862,
when the number was exactly the
same, that is, 700. Fires are most nu
merous in January and after that in
December. They are fewest in Sep
tember and August. The aggregate
for the Januarys sinoe 1851 waa 4847,
for December 4749, July 4460,
March 4328, April 4159, February
4094, November 8887, May 8624, June
3535, October 3392, August 3152, and
September 8159. As may be seen, the
winter months bfing the most visita
tions of fire, except July, whose large
number ia accounted J F by Fourth of
JiUj fijre,
MOTHER'S PAY,
Whan the babe lies on the heart
Cane depart j
Heavenly peaoe, heavenly rest
Fill the breast,
Whan the babe lies on the heart.
When I look on baby's taoe
la baby's place,
Taxing snarls to smoothness run
Magta span,
When I see that peaceful faoe.
Than queen to people, more to thee
I Joy to be ;
Than people to their quean thou'rt more
Told o'er and o'er
In every breath of thlae to me.
When thou Host on my heart
Hatred's smart
Turns to sweet lovo's soft spell
The way knows well
Through baby's Hps to mother's heart.
O'er responsive eyes and Hps
Bleep's eclipse
Boftly falls, breathing bliss
As I kiss
Th. tiny, rosy fingertip.
While with theo sweet tryst 1 keep,
Half asleep,
In thy silver, dream-world boat
Soft I float
O'er slumber's sacred deep.
AU the wild world's maddening fray
Melts away ;
Gladly all the world to lose
I would choose
Could I take this heavenly pay.
Lesser duty's strident scream '
Drops its theme ;
Joy and duty are one code,
Heaven-bestowed,
While I watch my baby droam. '
As I gate on baby's faoe
Angel's grace
, Falls around. Who from home
Cares to roam
While she sees the baby's fsce?
When my babe lies on my heart
Cares depart ;
Heaven and home by Heaven's grace
Are one place,
When my babe lies on my heart.
Martha Foote Crow, in Independent.
MRS. ARDTO STORY".
BY HELEN FOREHT GRAVES.
UESS your man
won't be home to
night," said Seth
Shapley.
I was standing at
the gate, where the
Norway spruces
cast long shadows
on the snow,
watching the crim
son dyes of the
unset, when Seth's
cumbrous sled,
drawn by two
sleepy OXen, Creak
Ad nut
SLSU "Why, what do
yon mean?" said I.
"Bridge is broke," declared Seth,
"ain't no way of fixiu' it before to
morrow noon I"
"Can't he come around by way of
Millville?" I asked.
Seth shook his head-
"They've took off the night train,"
said he. "Warn't enough passengers
to pay this winter."
Seth looked at his oxen's ears. I
looked at Seth.
"All alone up there, ain't you?"
said he, abruptly.
"Yes," I acknowledged, "I am all
alone."
"Better jest git aboard the sled and
come down to our place to stay all
night," suggested Seth.
"Oh, I couldn't do that?" I an
swered. "I expect Bufus's mother
down from Montreal at any time now ;
and there's the house to look after.
Besides, I'm not all afraid. Why
should I be?"
"Oh, I dunno IV said Seth, cutting a
fresh plug of tobacoo. "It's kind o'
spooky np there, ain't it, with Betsey
gone ?"
And then I remembered that my
maid-of-all-work had been summoned
to the siok bed of some ancient rela
tive, a few miles away.
My perturbed face must have ap
pealed to honest Seth's sense of chiv
alry, for ho burst out all of a sudden :
"I'll tell ye what, Mrs. Arden, I'll
end littlo Folly up to stay all night
with you. Polly's only a slip of a
thing, but she's a deal o' company,
and I'm pretty sartin she wouldn't
like nothin' no better."
"Oh. thank you I" said I. "It will
be very kind of you, Mr. Shapely."
And I strolled baok to the house,
the crisp wiud blowing my hair back,
and tho red sunset gleams lighting up
tho frozen landscape as with bars of
blood.
I was an artist's wife. We had not
been married a year yet, and Itiifus
had gone to the city to see about some
pictures that he was placing on aalo iu
a great art room.
We had been able to hire Haquette
House, as this fine eld mansion was
called, at a merely nominal rate, as
the wealthy pork-packer who built it
was tired of the loneliness of the situ
ation and had moved to Atlantic City,
where his money would make more
show. And Kutus bad the option of
paying the rent by painting a set of
panel pictures for his seaside dining
room. It wkh a larger house than we need
ed, but the grounds and gardens were
delightful, aud after alf, as Rufus and
I reasoned, it didn't cost us auy more
than a smaller house would, aud was a
doal more artistic.
But it did seem rather big and
gloomy iu the gathering dusk as I
came in that night, more especially as
I had never before been alone in it more
than a few hours at a time.
Consequently I was not sorry a fow
naiuuttis afterwsrd to ber Polly Hhup.
ley' voice as .at by tho Are.
"I came in the west door, " breathed I
Polly, flushed with the haste nhe had
made. "Did you know, Mis' Arden,
the west door warn't bolted?"
Polly was a tall fourteen-year-older,
with a curly crop of hair and a nasal
voice.
"Betsy waa careless about the
doors," said I, remembering with a
guilty pang Rufus had bidden me be
very careful about securing the prem
ises in his absence.
"Bocause," he had Baid, "there's
that money Welford wanted me to
bank for him in the studio desk
drawer, and the diamond necklace in
the cabinet."
And then, with a sudden after
gleam of recollection it flashed across
me just where Rufus had stood, by the
depot stove, when he spoke the words,
and how a stout, short man, in a
slouched fur cape and a ragged over
coat, had watched us as he waited for
a ticket and chewed tobacoo.
Could he havo heard the word? And
how was he to know that "the dia
mond necklace" was only a state
trinket of cut glass, borrowed of au
artist friend for the decoration of tho
lay figure, or that Welford's money
was only a few dollars, seat in repay
ment of something he had borrowed
from Rufus? '
Upon the whole, I was glad that
Polly Shapely had come to bear mo
company during that long, solitary
winter night. Of courso there was no
danger, but that
"We'll go back and bolt it, Polly,"
said I.
"Oh, I done that!" Baid Polly.
"Gracious! ain't them halls dark I I
came through the etudy "
"Studio, Polly," I gently corrected
her.
"Studio, then," Polly accepted the
emandation. "Tho fire ain't quite
out, here. Ain t no danger o fire, is
there?"
"Perhaps it had better be covered
with aahes," said I. "Bun and attend
to it, Polly, and I'll see about the
tea.
"I've got some apples and chestnuts
in my bag," cried Polly, "and some o'
mother s riz uougnnnts. Hue thought
mebbe you hadn't nothin' baked up,
seein' Betsey was gone. Gimme a
candle, Miss Arden. I wouldn't go
through them halls in the dark ag'in
for nothin'. I could swear there was
spooks a-rushin' arter me."
"What nonsense, Polly !" Baid I.
But, nevertheless, I handed her the
brass candlestick that Rufus had
bought at a sale on account of its an
tiquity. I was just hanging over the tea-kettle
when the scuffle of Polly's footsteps
was heard onoe more, this time at rail
road rate.
"I wouldn't be hired to go through
that there study ag'in, Mis' Ardon,"
said she, slamming down the candle
stick on the table.
"Why, Polly, what's the matter?"
"Them portraits a starin' down at
ma 1" gasped the girl. "Their eyes a
follerin' me all round I Gracious, what
a start it gimme 1"
"That's the way portraits always do,
Polly," explained I. "You're a goose !"
"I can't help it," pauted Polly. "It
fa'rly makes me creep. An' the woman
in white, standin' up on the platform
she turned her head an' looked at
me, she did."
"What, Polly a wooden figure,
dressed like the Lady of Avenel?" aud
I burst out laughing. "Why, it's
jointed, like a doll!"
"Well, I can't help it. It did turn
its head. And I wouldn't go back
there ag'in, Mis' Ardon, not if yon
woe to give me a silver dollar 1"
"Well, Polly, you needn't." I
soothed her, perceiving that she was
really nervous and frightened. "We'll
have tea here by the fire, and after
ward we'll roast tho apples and the
chestnuts. There are no portraits here
to follow you with their eyea."
And Tolly soon forgot her tribula
tions in -the tea, the raspberry jam
and the tales I told her of life in beau
tiful, ice-girdled Montreal.
I made her up an impromptu bed on
a sofa in my own room opening from
this cheerful, fire-lighted apartment ;
but when she was asleep and snoring,
I quietly threw a shawl over my
shoulders and relighted the candle.
"I will see after that fire myself,"
thought I. "There's no telling what
accidents might happen, and we are
not insured."
Nevertheless, I could but remember
Polly's idea of tho "spooks" as I
passed along the silent, moonlighted
hall to the studio door.
Opening it suddenly, the draught
blew out my candle ; but the moon il
luminated the room with faint silver
radiance, aud one or two live embers
yet glimmered ou tho deep hearth, the
last remains of Bufus's cherished Yule
log. Just in the line of the bigmullioned
window the lay figure occupied its ac
customed place on a carpeted dais
close to Bufus's easel, and ehauciugto
glance in that direction my blood
frozo chill.
From beneath the white hood of the
"Itady of Aveuel," which had been
Rufus's lust historical study, a pair of
real, human eyes seemed to Hash a
sudden furtive look at me, aud was
it only a memory of Polly's panic, a
mere freak of my disordered imagina
tion, or did the figure really move a
little?
With electric swiftness, the whole
thing rushed across my miud Bufus's
careless words at the railway station,
the stout stranger in the fur cap, the
fact of my being alone aud defenseless
in this solitary spot--
Yet, after the lirst fright, my senses
seemed to rally themselves into a
strange calm. I relighted my candle
at the last Yule ember, covered it with
a bed of aslies, composedly walked
across the floor as if nothing unusual
Uai huppeued, aud softly looked the
door behind uie.
"He", welcome to the tUge neck
lace if ho wants it." thought I ; "and
the money is safe in a Branal-locked
desk. The studio window is a deal
too high for him to escape that way,
besides being guarded with a strong
wire netting ; and I don't see how else
he can escape, unless he goes np the
chimney."
Then I went back to my own room,
where the firo crackled cheerily, and
Polly snored with soothing monotony ;
but the reader can easily imagine that
there waa no sleep for me that night.
With the orimson flush of daybreak,
I was about to rouse Polly np and
Bend her down to summon her father,
when a loud knocking at the door
startled me.
It was Rufus himself !
"Well, pussy," said he, "were you
nervous almut being left alone? I got
Sara Penny to row me over the river,
aud came across country in a cutter.
Here's Seth Shapley, with his ox team,
to take his girl home. Got any fire?
I'm half frozen to doath."
"Kurus Mr. Shapley 1" I gasped,
"don't stop here t Come right to the
studio. Here's the key. I don't
know, but I think I'm almost sure
thero's a man locked up there I"
Without pausing to answer their
eager questions, I hurried them along
the wide, tile-paved hall, and in al
most lees time than it takes to relate
the incidents the door was unlocked
and sturdy Seth had got the stout,
rod-faced man by the throat, while
Rufus was pinioning his arms.
"It's yon, is it, Ben Frowley?"
shouted Seth. "Just out o' Danne
more Jail for one offense, an' now
you're qualifyin for another term,
hay? Ye shif'less, thievin', drunken
scamp, I know ye !"
And in a minute or two they had
him, safely secured with ropes, lying
panting and breathless on the floor.
The stage necklace was in his
pocket, and be had contrived to pick
the Branal lock in spite of everything
and possess himself of the few bills in
the desk drawer, while the actual
jointed substratum of the White Lady
of Avenel, whose garments he had
taken to conceal his identity, under
the semblance of a draped lay figure,
was pushed beneath the dais in wooden
confusion.
All of a sudden we heard the voice
of Polly behind ub.
"I knowed the critter moved its
head I" said she. "Didn't I tell ye
so, Mis' Arden?"
And that was the last time I ever
allowed myself to be left alone in
Raquette House.
"Not that I'm afraid," said I, "but
but every one knows that discretion
is the better part of valor." Saturday
Night.
Thickness ot the Soap Bubble Film.
The most powerful of the modern
microscopes will render a point one
hundred thousandth part of an inch in
diameter perfectly visible. While
this is true beyond a doubt, there are
reasons for believing that a single
molecule of matter is much smaller
even than that. One reason for this
belief has been deduoed from calcula
tions made on the soap bubble.
Scientists have made measurements of
the thickness of the envelope of Boapy
water inclosing the air of the bubble
when it had become so thin as to pro
duce rainbow tints. At the appear
ance of the shade of violet it waa one
fourth of the thiokness of the length
of an ordinary violet wave of light
(one-sixty thousandth of an inch),
thus making the thickness equal to
one two hundred thousandth of au
inch.
As the bubble continues to expand
a black patch formed near the end of
the pipe from whioh the bubble was
being blowu. Measurements were
then taken to asoertaiu the thickness
of the black portion of the bubble,
and the experimenters were astonished
beyond measure, when they found the
thickness (or Thinness) to bo only
one-fifty millionth of an inchl St.
Louis Republic.
This Miner Was Lucky.
Michael O'Reilly's lucky star must
have shone over him, for he had about
as narrow an escape from iustant death
at tbeltarus Mine as was ever record
ed. He was ascending the ladder-way
in the pumping shaft above the 400,
when one of the ladder rounds broke,
and ho lost his balance and fell into
the shaft. He dropped about fifty feet,
and in some manner managed to grasp
hold of a water-pipe or something of
tho kind and clung to it. Otherwise,
he would have fallen 200 feet to the
six-hundred level and into seventy-five
feet of water. He managed to swing
to the ladder again. Another miner
assisted him to a level. He was raised
to the surface, aud Drs. Wells and Mo-.
Crimmou were summoned. They
found that, aside from a fracturod
ankle and some painful bruises, the
man was not seriously hurt, but the
shock hail been great. He was carried
to his home, iu Dublin tiuloh. Mr.
O'Reilly has a wife and ono child.
Butte (Montana) Inter-Mountain.
A Fish With a ICulilier Kuuil.
Forest aud Stream speaks of a
curious find iu the Cape Anu fish mar
ket, at Gloucester, Mos-t. It was
nothing less than a mackerel with a
rubber band around tho body. The
baud had beeu put ou the fish when
quite small, and stayed there ia spite
of the rapid growth of the wearer.
The fish s body uuder the bantl did not
grow, which caused a depression iu
the full-growu body of about three
inches in depth. The depression was
covered with a healthy skiu iu uo way
unlike that on the rest of the body.
Tho fish measured iu length fourteen
inches, diameter of body each side of
the depression, seven aud three-fourths
inches, diuiueter of depression, five
iuehes. The tisli was uudoubt 'illy iu
a healthy condition, aud the ba ; I waa
souud and coujd be stretched, like ijuy
other baud.
A BIG BURDEN OF PAPER.
arErioN 01r HOW TO dispose of
OLD MONET ORDERS.
The Government Cannot Afford t
Destroy Them A Kemarkable
Case of Counterfeiting Orders.
WHAT is Uncle Sam going
to do with all the old
money orders? They
have been accumulating
on his hands for nearly thirty years,
and not one of them has been de
stroyed. More than two billion dol
lars' worth of them in value originally
represented are now stored away in
the various buildings belonging to the
Postoffice Department at Washington,
occupying thousands of cnbio feet of
precious space. To hold them all
would require several ordinary-sized
houses, and still they continue to pile
up. It is the same way with many
million dollars' worth of postal notes.
Ulnasmuch as they are vouchers for
money paid out, it would hardly do to
burn them. The Government, in re
lation to the money order system, acts
as a sort of trust company. Citizens
place their cash in its hands, and the
canceled orders are evidence of the
fulfillment of the trust.
Besides, things are constantly hap
pening which rentier it necessary to
refer to the baok-number orders. A
man writes to the department, saying:
"I am the administrator of the estate
of John Jones. Among his private
papers I have found certain money or
ders, dated some years back. Pleaso
send duplicates, in order that I may
cash them." Now, it frequently hap
pens that the orders discovered in such
ways are from ten to twenty years old.
By turning to the files it can be ascer
tained in a moment whether these se
curities have been redeemed or not.
Or perhaps William- Smith will
write : "Two years ago James Robin
son, of Podunk, sent me a money or
der for $50. I did not receive it.
Kindly furnish me with a duplicate."
The order referred to is looked up and
found in the files canceled, beariog
William Smith's signature to tho re
ceipt. Smith, on being informed of
this fact, deolares the signature a
forgery. A postofhce detective ia then
put on the oase and investigates it.
May be he decides that Smith's claim
is good ; but sinoe the money order
system was founded in 1865 there have
not been more than 200 casea of for
gery of this description.
When a money order is missing a
dnplioate can always bo obtained.
Three hundred Buch duplicates are is
suod by the department at Washing
ton every day, on an average. The
originals disappear in all sorts of
curious ways. Farmers, through mis
take, frequently keep thorn as re
ceipts, instead of forwarding them
through the mails. After awhile the
unsophisticated agriculturist is dunned
for payment by the keeper of a store
in a neighboring town. "Why," he
savs, "I sent you the money by post
some time ago, and here is the receipt
in my pocket." With that he exhibits
the money order. Hut it often nap
pens that the payee, learning that
cash awaits him at the postoflice, ap
plies for a duplicate. Railway postal
clerks sometimes steal letters ami fiud
money orders in them. To get rid of
them, they burn them. Then the own
ers ask for duplicates.
In the history of the money order
system only two instances of the cnun
terfeiting of these securities have beeu
recorded. The first and more remark
able case was in 1873. John N. Young,
who had been employed iu the money
order division of the Chicago i'ost
oflice, thought that he had discovered
a wiv to cet rich easily. His tcheme,
being without precedent, might have
been fairly successful, H he hud worse j
it skillfully ; but he carried it out very
clumsily indeed. For $M he hired a
drunken printer to set up typo for an
imitation of the regular money ordei
blank. This was not difficult, inas
much aa the kind of blank used by the
department has always been severely
simple. However, tho type setting
was so badly done as to call attention
almost immediately to the fraud.
Nevertheless, the swindler mauaged to
obtain cash for a number of his orders.
They were for $50 each the maximum
allowed at that time. Allot them bore
the stamp of Oshkosh, Wis. They were
to be paid to fictitious names iu Indi
anapolis, Iud., Springfield, 111., and
other cities. Young managed to steal
a number of official envelopes aud "ad
vice blanks" to help out his game, but
he had none of the regular postoflice
stamps, and so was obliged to employ
ordinary postage stamps for making
his letters of advice to postmasters.
This was calculated to excite attention.
The rogue applied for the money at
the different postofiices under the riot i
tious names which he hail employed.
He would have been caught iu Cincin
nati, but tho postmaster, who had been
warned iu advance from Washington,
stupidly lt him get away when he pre
ented his bogus orders, telling him to
call again. Of course he did nut come
back. Finally he was caught iu
Florida. Ou his way north ho jumped
from the train, but was subsequently
recaptured and eventually Isu led iu
the penitentiary. Washington Star.
The Best Hauaaas.
In selecting bauauas it is well to re
member that the fruit which is largest,
the deopest yellow, aud the least augu
lar is, as a rule, the best. tue who
has become bauaua-w isc through look
ing into their culture in Jamaica
(where most of the bautnas I list come
to our market are grown) denies the
current belief that bananas are l ipeued
on the plant iu that cuuutry, ami there
fore much superior to those that are
cut green. Detroit Free Press,
Cnda forbids the adulteration of
ftttet, u4 C's4 i right,
LOVE THE MAGICIAN.
Ring bird, ripple rill ;
Purple Is the distant hill ;
Bky Is bright, and da ia clear.
Love Is here.
Frown sky, vanish hill j
Mute the bird, and dry the rill ;
All the day Is drear ond dead.
Love Is Ad.
George B. Gallup, in Munsey.'s1
HUMOR OF THE BAY.
Books of travel Thousand-mila
tickets. -Truth.
Consistency is a jewel often sold to
pay the price of success. Puck.
A mistake is apt to attract more at
tention to us than a virtue. Ram's
Horn.
The trouble with many men is that
they will snatch defeat from victory.
Puok.
"I always did enjoy an intellectual
feast," said the cannibal, a he ate the
Yale man. Life.
When a man pawns his honor ha
finds that the legal interest on perjury
is tremendously high. Truth.
Judge (to tramp prisoner) "Fifty
dollars or thirty days." "Time's
money, Judge. Gi'me thirty days."
A newly discovered weather prophet
says that an icy pavement is a sure
sign of an early fall. Hartford Jour
nal. - A Kensington doctor suggests that
a good thing for the Cramps is a con
tract for a new warship. Philadelphia
Record.
Christie "That young Mr. Sapp
talks just like a book, doesn't he?"
Kathryn "Yes, a blank book." De
troit Free Press.
He "There goes Hatton in his now .
overooat. What do you think of him?"
She "Ho is simply out of sight."
Washington News.
"Goodluck has had his salary raised ;
was it for extra work?" "Yes; he
always listens when the proprietor
tells his baby's smart sayings."
"How are you getting along learn
ing to operate your typewriter?"
"First rate. 1 can almost lead soma
of the things I write." Chicago
Reoord.
Husband (irately) "You think you
know everything, don't you?'' Wife
(softly) "No, dear ; I never did know
why you know so little." Detroit
Free Press.
"I am sorry, but the picture looks
like a perfect failure to me." Artist
"Great Scott, what a perfect success I
must have made of it I" Chicago
Inter-Ooean.
She "I don't like that Mr. Smith;
he is always riding aoino hobby or
other to death." He "Ah, why don't
you oall the attention of the S. P. C.
A. people to it. "
The differenco between the wealthy
idler and the leader of au orchestra i
that the former's solo ambition is to
kill time, while the latter beats it. -Philadelphia
Record.
Mamma "What are you and Fred
die quarrelling about?" "We were
playing keep house and Freddie oame
home and found dinner wasn't ready."
Chicago Inter-Ooeau.
She--"Is it true that ft lover never
eats anything?" He "Not after he
becomes engaged. " She "Why not?"
He "He never has any money to
spare." Brooklyn Life.
Benediot "Why won't she marry
you? Is there another man in the
case?" Singleton "I'm afraid ther
is." "That's so? Do you know who
i. is ?" "Yes her father. "
Maude "Why dou't you give
youug Sewers some encouragement if
you love him?" Nell "Oh, he ought
to be able to press his owu suit. He's
a tailor." Philadelphia Record.
Bunker "I was fool enough yester
day to tell that doctor of yours that
you sent me." Hill "What difference
did that make?" Bunker "He madu
me pay cash." New York Herald.
Elderly Maiden "This is so unex
pected, Mr. Wellalong, that--that you
must give me time." Elderly Lover
"Time, Miss Rebeoca? Do you thiuk
there is auy to spare I"--Chicago Tri
bune. Forgot herself : BriifRB- "You knew
Mangle recently married a widow and
went ou a wedding trip, didn't you? J
bw him yesterday ou his return."
Griggs "Anything happen while he
was away?" 15riggs--"i'es. lie says
that in a tit of absent-mindedness she
proposed to hiiu again. ''--Brooklvu
Life.
"Here," said tho very youuv; man,
"is a clmmeleou." "Oil, Mr. Ctllow,"
she exclaimed, "this is very kind ol
you. I shall take goo I care of it. " "1
hope you will keep it to remind you of
me." "I shall take the greatest pleas
ure in doing so. (After it pause) What
a pity it doesn't stay green ell tho
time." Washington St:ir.
Mr. Gotham "So you ure going to
settle in the United St it'-sV" New Ar
rival (from South America) - "Yea,
sir; they've got to drawing tilings a
little too tine iu South Aiiii i u-u to suit
me. Why, sir, it's got so now ttmt a
man cau't even get a joo at overthrow
ing a government unless he delon (s to
the Revolutionist' Uuiou aud hai paid
his fees regularlv for i nioutlii. "
New York Weekly.
"I have got a ilrst-ratc place for
you," 6aid the employment agent.
'Tiie woman who wauls u c .!; '.is'.l Ki
be a Irred girl liei'oclf, so there's no
doubt but tlr.it she will be iv un
you." "Easy on me?" hi-romi.'.l ihe
applicant for a ptuco. "Noi an; i she
would. Why, site woe.'dn't do a I nn,;
but sit up of liight-i '.liinViiii out
to get even on lit j fo;' the wiiy . i
treated when she lrnl to iiw on. h -r-uelr.
You don't kilo v a.' i i J -i: ' 1 i'
wouieu us a last yeai liifw i.tsl."
yi!iiu.ti'i.iiiti '.uruu.'.