THI FOREST REPUBLICAN
j pabnehed rry Wednesday, by
J. E. WENK.
OB a la Smerbauh A Co.' Building
HJt iTHIKT, TIONKSTA, r.
Term, . . SI. BO pr Yaar.
N nterlpMom teeelre! for a shorter period
(bun tre month
Oorrpotwrttm Mtlelted from aO puts of the
eonntry. Ne Mile will b Ukn of aeajatoui
vnnaalcslle.
RATI OF ADVUHTWHWs
On 8M, n toea, a kueftievw 4 1
One8qnei,oiitach,osonth
On. 8qnre, one Inch, three monta..-
One Sqnere, one Ineb, one jeer..
Two Bqnsrr, one jest. W
Quarter Column, one jeer.
lUlf Coliron, one year. 00
On Column, on jeer
Lmrel edTrtleBBU tea per Dm each h
ertioa.
Marriage m death noUeee frmbe.
Ad bine for yrlT advertisement eoHeU f
terir. Temporary edTerteeaMale SUM H
dveno.
Jot work-cash ra tsUver.
bOREST
PUBLICAN.
VOL. XX, NO, 47. TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY, MARCH 21, 1888. $1.50 I'EIl ANNUM.
RE
The San Francisco papers soy thnt the
Chinese in thoir city are "gradually
adopting American garments."
Oyer 5,000 acres of good timber land
near ilawkinsvillo, Ga., sold at miction
recently for $38. Homo of the land went
for leu than one-half cent an acre.
"Last year was phenomenally prosper
ous, and I sco no reason why 1888 should
fall short of 1887," said Vice President
Gicon of the Pennsylvania Koad.
Out In Mitchell, Diik., the children
till study the old fashioned geographies
which show the sito ot the thriving town
in which thoy live to bo in the Qrcat
American Desert.
One hundred and twenty bull fights
were given In the City of Mexico dining
the pnst year. Seventeen bull fighters
were wounded, and one professional and
two amateur fighters killed.
The Kleetriral Jierine says tlmt the
lightning rod is a relic of superstition,
nnd that the day wilt come when a light
ning rod on a house will be regarded in
the same light as a horseshoe over a
door.
It has been ascertained that, free as
light and air are, there are over 27,000
families in the city of Paris inhabiting
apartments having no other opening than
a door, and that at least 00,000 families
in tho city of London reside in cellars.
Stating the matter on a cash basis, the
use use of natural gas has conferred on
Pittsburg an annuity of six million dol
lars, which, at six per cent., repro.-cntsa
capital of one hundred million dollars
placed at the disposal of the fortunate
owners of that favored locality.
Judge Cook, of Jacksonville, Ala., re
cently bought from the State for 20 as
a speculation, forty acres of land on
which tho tuxes had beconio delinquent.
On looking up the site of the land he
found to his great astonishment that it
lay within tho corporate limits of the
town of Anniston and was worth $10,
000, at a low valuation.
The little town of Marlon, Mass.,
where Mrs. Cleveland spent a few weeks
la it summer as tho guest of General
Oreely, is experiencing a real estate
boom, says tho New York Worhf, owing
to her stay there. The residents are
blessing her for the visit, and although
they cau"t be said to worship tho ground
she walked on, they value it very highly-
A two-cent stamp will now carry a let
ter from any place in the United States
to any point in Mexico or Canada. An
arrangiment for reciprocal postal facili
ties has been in operation between this
country and Mexico fur some mouths,
and a similar agreement has just been
concluded with Canada. Two cents to
take a letter over tho biggest part of this
continent.
The Savannah Xrte says that on a re
cent morning a lady of the' city called to
see a poor woman who was in great
trouble and in actuul want. She told the
latter that her burden had seemed greater
than she could bear, and that she decided
to end her life; but chancing to read Dr.
Talmage's sermon on woman, sho was so
encouraged by the hopeful, cheering
words of the Brooklyn preacher that she
was going to see if she couldn't make it
worth while to livn.
The Chinese Government is, it is re
ported, about to employ a dozen bright
young men as reporters of civilization.
They will be chosen by competitive ex
amination, and will be sent abroad for
two years to study foreign countries.
Each will take a specialty to work up,
and will tend a monthly report to
Peking. After two years, tho govern
ment will use the service! of each in the
department in which he has done best,
and tho most promising youug men will
be ennobled.
The "Huncas dol Inca Company,"
formed in Lima, Peru, for the purpose of
searching for and working tho old Inca
gold mines, and also endeavoring to re
work old cemeteries' where millions of
dollars are believed to be interred, is
about to commence operations in the
A maon valleys of Santa Ana, Lares, and
Pancartaml o. The gold accumulated by
the labor of 40,0110 meu, and buried with
the sovereigns on two well recorded in
stances, will be the chief object of the
company's search.
The total wheat crop of the world is
about a, 000, 000, 000 bushels, and at least
1,500,000,000 bushels are consumed in
the countries in w hich it is grown, leav
ing a baluuce of 500,000,00) to supply
countries growing no wheat or growing
less than they consume. Speculation
deals only with this baluuce that goes
into general trade, and the speculators of
the world in a siugle year will sell or
transfer in their peculiur way forty or
fifty t roes 500,000,000 bushels of wheat.
Iu New York a single day sometimes
witnesses a sale or truusfer of 0,000, 000
bushelf of wheat. The damage done by
speculation consists iu lowering the price
of the whole umount of actual wheat by
this enormous inflation of "paper
wheat," uot ii bushel iu a thousand of
which is ever delivered.
THAT OENTl.E MAN VTROM BOSTON
TOWN,
AN IDYL OP OUKOOS.
Two wnhfont brothers loved a fair
Young lady, rieh nnd good to see;
And oh, hor lilnck and nimndniit hnlrl
Ami oh, her wonderou witchery!
Her father kept n cattle farm:
These brothers kept hor safe from harm;
From harm of cattle on the hill)
From thirk n-cked bulls, loud liellnwlng
The livelong morning, loud nnd shrill,
Ami lashing sides like anything.
From roaring bulls that tossed tiie sand
And pawed the lilies from the land.
There came a third young man. He came
From far nnd fatuous boston town.
He was not hnndsoinn, was not game,
Hut he could "cook a goose" as brown
As any man that set foot on
The sunlit shores of Oregon.
This Boston man he taught the school,
Taught gentleness and love alway;
Saiit love mi l kindness, as a rule,
Would ultimately make it pay.
He was so gentle, kind, that he
Could make a noun and verb agree.
So when one day the brother grew
All jealous nnd did strip to fight,
Ha gently stood lietween the two
And meekly told them 'twas not right
''I have a higher, bettor plan,"
Outspoke this gentle boston man.
"My plan Is this: Forget this fray
Atsmt tlmt liiy hand of hers;
Go take your guns and hunt all day
High up you lofty hill of firs,
And while voti hunt, my loving doves,
"Why, I will learn which one she loves."
The brothers sat the win ly hill.
Their hair shone yellow, like spun gold,
Their rides crossed their hiM, but still
They sat ami sighed and shook with cold,
Their hearts lay bleeding far below;
Above them gleatne.1 white peaks of snow.
Their hounds lay crouching, slim and neat;
A spotted circle in the gram,
Their valley lay lienenth their feet;
They heard the wido-winged eagles pass;
The eagle cleft the clouds aliove,
Yet what could they but sigh aud love.
"If I could die," the elder sighed,
"My dear young brother here might wed."
"Oh, would to heaven I had diod!"
The younger sighed with liended head,
Then each looked each full in the face
And each sprang up and stood in place.
"If I could die," the elder spake.
"I'le by your hand, tho world would say
'Twos accident; ami for her sake.
Dear brother, be it so, 1 pray."
"Not that! the younger nobly said:
Then tossed his gun and turned his head.
And fifty paces back he paced.
And as lie paced he drew the ball;
Then sudden stopgied and wheeled and faced
His brother to the death and fall.
Two shot ran wild upon the air,
But, lo, the two stood harmless there.
Th eagle poised high In the air;
Far, far below the bellowing
Of bullocks ceased, and everywhere
Vast silence sat all questioning.
The spotted hounds ran circling round,
Their red, wet noses to the ground.
And now each brother came to know
That each hnd drawn the deadly ball;
And for that fair girl far lielow
Had sought in vain to silent fall.
And then the two did gladly shake,
And thus the elder bravely spake:
"Now let as run right hastily
Aud tell the kind schoolmaster all.
Yea, yea, aud if she choose not me,
but all on you her favors fall.
This valiant scene, till all life ends.
Dear brother, binds us best of friends."
The hounds sped down, a spotted line,
The bulls in tall, abundant grass.
Shook back their horns from bloom and vine
Aud trumpeted to see them pass;
They were so fair, they loved so true,
These brothers scarce knew what to do.
They sought the kind schoolmaster out
Asswilt as sweei the light of morn;
They could but love, thi-y could not doubt
This man so geutle, in a horn,
Thoy cried: "Now, whose the lily hand,
That lady's of this webfoot lundf
They lxwed before the big nosed man,
That long nosed man from boston town;
They talk-ed as ouly lovers can,
They talked, but he could only frown;
And still they talked, and still they plead;
It was as pleading with the dead.
At last the Boston man did speak:
"Her lather has a thousand cows.
An hundred bulls all fat and slick;
He also has this ample house."
The brothers' eyes stick out thereat
Ho far you might have hung your hat
" I liked the looks of this big house
My lovely boys won't you come inf
Her father has a thousand cows,
He also has a heap of tin.
The girlf Oh yes, tho girl, you see.
The girl just now she married me."
.ot'j n i ii Miller.
LAD W ELLSL ANDIXG.
BY H. E. CLAMP.
Those who have never heard of Lad
well's Landing will scurcely be open to
tho accusation of gcopraphical ignor
auce. It is a lone Western settlement a
frontier poiut of civilisation which a few
bold pioneers have established, from the
most prominent of whom the settlement
takes its name. 1. ail well was the doctor
and druggist-the medicine muu of the
couimuuity and next to him in point of
importance ranked the groccryuian, Xor
ris, who was the wealthier of the two. A
few other stores, some residences, a
church and a Posto:lice composed the
place, tho total of tho population being
about a couple of hundred.
A freak of funcy had led me to settle
there, and for the sake of a livelihood I
dispensed medicines and patched up
broken shins for I.adwell.
It was not the charm of this occupa
tion which kept my restless spirit at Lad
well's l anding, however, but the beauty
of Kdith Norris, who was the only
daughter of the grocerymau.
My record, however, w as uot one which
impressed old Noirisvery favorably, and
although Kdith and I hud fully satisfied
ourselves that we could be satisfied with
one another, he set his heel upon the af
fair in such a determined manner that
outwardly it had to terminate.
Lad w ell's business hud grown to be
rather a profitable one, and his success
had tempted mother young Philadelphia
graduate to migrate to the place and put
out his shingle.
The young fellow was line looking
and of very good family, with a little
money of his own, and as he made him
self popular in the place a small connec
tion was soon guaranteed him.
It leaked out that a good deal of suc
cess was attributable to the fact that
Norris had taken him up, and people
were not long in discovering that the old
man hud determined, if possible, to make
him his son-in-law.
This proved to be correct, and as soon
M a new house hud beeu built for the
young doctor the forthcoming nuptials
were announced.
My disappointment and chagrin avai led
ma little, and partly from a spirit of
pride I kept aloof from every one as
much as possible, leaving things to
work themselves out as they might.
It wns not until the day of tho wed
ding arrived that I seemed to awake
from this comatose condition ; then I
grew suddenly desperate and seemed to,
realize that A brutal sacrifice was going
to bo enncted before my very eyes, for,
despite her acquiescence in her fnther's
wishes, I knew that Kdith Norris loved
me as she could love no other.
To drown these feelings I turned to
thnt most common antidote, drink.
Hut instead of calming or benumbing
my feelings on this occasion the spirits
only seemed to increase my frenzy, and
when the bridal party started for the
little frame church I was prepared to
commit any outrageous act. Walking
directly into the place in the rear of
tho bridal party 1 took my place un
observed among tho spectators. Tho
pastor had barely commenced the cere
mony when I stepped boldly up to the
rail and made a mild protest against the
proceedings.
Edith, trembling with fright, seized
the arm of her intended husband, who,
with a supercilious smilo on his face,
seemed to view my interference with the
utmost indillcrence. This ironical treat
ment infuriated me. Already several of
tho men present were preparing to forci
bly eject me from the place at the insti
gation of Norris.
In an instant my two hands held two
revolvers and I had ordered all hands
down.
At this instant Edith fell fainting in
one of the bystanders' arms and 1 re
placed my pistols and walked out of the
place.
An hour afterward I learned that I
had murdered the woman I loved. What
hud been mistaken for a mere fainting
tit proved to have been paralysis of the
heart.
Sundry threats of vengeance reached
my cars, but as I was callous to them, I
suppose, nothing happened.
Three days afterwards, Edith was laid
away in the quiet burying ground of
Ladwell's Landing.
The night following thut day I did
what for the last few days I had not
done, owing to nervous excitement; I
slept.
Perhaps an hour had elapsed when I
commeuccd to dream. My sensations
were such as to defy description. 1 was
in some charncl house of the dead. Cof
fins were ranged in grim order all around
me. Somo strunge instinct guided me to
one. I knelt beside it, when suddenly I
heard a cry answering to my own lament
ation. In an instant the thin deal shell
was severed by ray ready kuifo and into
my arms, clad in the sad trappings of tho
grave, fell my lost love, Editb.
Awaking from this strange dream I
looked around me. A feverish perspira
tion stood upon my forehead. A strange
fancy excited my brain. Looking at my
watch I noticed that it was only eleven
o'clock. Dragging on my clothes me
chanically, I went down stairs to Lad
well's room. The doctor was in and
busy smoking and readiug the paper,
lie looked at me as I entered the room,
and then continued reading his paper.
"Ladwcll," said I, "did you ever au
thenticate a case of ante-mortem burial?"
"I can't say that I have personally
but there have been plenty of instances
recorded. I remember reading of one in
a mcdizal journal a month or two ago.'
The body of a young lady who had died
of I forget what now was taken up for
tne purpose ot re interment in another
place. For some reason or other the
collin was opened, aud from abrasions on
the arms and tho murks of finger nails on
the lid it wus assumed that the unfor
tunate girl had been buried alive, an
swered Ladwell.
1 then related my dream to Ladwell, but
he refused to believe it to be otherwise
than the result of a disorganized physical
state, so I reluctantly obeyed his injunc
tion to get to bed again as speedily as
possible.
Sleep had scarcely again sealed my eyes
before the same stranro phantom re
turned, and I awoke more startled than
ever.
There must have been a look of intense
alarm on my face as I confronted Ladwell
the second time.
lie was still busy with the paper, but
he turned from it to listen to me with a
conspicuous eagerness.
1 had only to repcut the repetition ox
my dream.
"I have been thinking since you left
me that Edith was at one time given to
fuintinir spells when she was younger,"
said the doctor, thoughtfully.
"I feel ftu irresistible impulse govern
ing me, and I shall not rest until I am
satisfied that Edith Norris is really
dead," I replied.
"Hut what do you propose to do?"
asked Ladwell.
"1 shall go direct to her grave, exhume
her, and endeavor to restore auimution
unless there are unmistakable proofs of
her death," I replied.
"impossible, impossible. You would
be lynched in an instant if discovered, and
probably I should be implicated.
"I.adwell, for God's sake think what
an awful fate it would be for that angel
if my dream were true. I appeal to you
to help me. I'll go through auything for
you if you do," 1 suid.
I knew Ladwell was soft hearted and
would yield, so a few minutes luter our
plans were laid.
"lienieniber, if we're caught our lives
aren't worth a tig, for nobody will be
lieve we are anything but pure and sim
ple body snutchers," said Ladwetl.
"I'll do as much for you if I survive it,
Ladwell," I said.
A few moments later Ladwell's so
ciable went rattling up the street us if his
call were rather a serious one, and I no
ticed thut it was just past midnight.
A few seconds luter I emerged from
the office door and followed it stealthily
up the street, looking as 1 went to dis
cover if any one else was about.
The night was dark, fortunately, aud
no sign of any one else was visible as I
made my way to the quiet burying
ground which lay about live blocks away
from the nearest house.
When 1 arrived Ladwell wus awaiting
me, his horse tethered in the shade of a
tree. We took from the sociable a spade,
and after some little searching found the
grave we were iu search of.
We took turns at the digging, and
while one dug the other watched.
Our task wus soon completed.
liut, oh! unmitigated horror! uo sign
of life was perceptible us we lifted the
cold and inanimate form from its sepul
chre. I could have sworn that those
phantasms of my brain were true.
Ladwcll observed my dismay. "Let
us hope," ho said, "we will try our
best."
"Try our best in the face of this?'1 t
said.
"Certainly. If you consent we will
apply the magnetic test."
"We must take her away then," I said.
"Certainly."
Half an hour later tho body of Edith
was within the sociable and the collin
which held her remains was again cov
ered up. The grave was left exactly to
all appearances as before.
We took our seats, the dead between
us,
Our course was now to return to the
house by a circuitous route, but just as
we were starting oil two or three men
who had evidently been secreted watch
ing us sprang towurd tho horse's head
and called on us to surrender.
In an instant tho horse sprang for
ward and we were dashing along through
the darkness at a paco which soon out
distanced our pursuers, who were on
foot.
"That is the matter with being too
sure," said Ladwell as we slacked up at
the end of our first mile to listen if we
were being followed.
There was no indication of it.
No one knew the roads in that locality
better than ourselves.
Once or twice I asked Ladwell what
he intended doing.
"Leave it to me," was his answer.
At the end of an hour we were again
safe in Ladwell's back yard, tho hoi so
stabled and our precions burden stretched
upon the sofa in Ladwell's private room.
Wo had escaped by a miracle.
We had now to appeal to our last re
source. Ladwell was a firm believer in
the virtues of the magnet. Not the
slightest symptom of life rewarded our
minuto examination. Still Ladwcll
seemed hopeful. I had drifted into the
deepest despondency. The battery was
just placed in motion when the first
streak of dawn Etole through tho blinds.
Through them also appeared a human
face.
There was a sound of tramping feet ap
proaching tho door, and we both knew
thut probably our last hour had come.
There is a kind of tribunal popular
among the denizens of the West w hich
brooks no delay.
Judge Lynch Bpeedily decided upon
the merits of our case. It was a mere
matter of adjusting the rope.
Hut the sentence was never executed.
While the dread work of preparation
proceeced science was performing its
wonderful mission.
Instead of the hempen cord arounl
my neck the arms of Edith Norris were
twined. Ketribution is swift and also
restitution. Wo were married on the
spot where the sentence of death should
have been executed, and to-day there is
only one doctor at Ladwell's Landing. It
is Ladwell. Nete York Mercury.
A Linguistic Prodigy.
There is in Chicago a wee bit of a girl,
sis years of ago, who can converse in six
languages 1 Vet she is not a prodigy nor
do her parents maintain that she is.
Anything is famong the possibilities in
this aire of the world.
Little Coriune Colin was born in Chi
cago six years ago. Her father is tier
man, in charge of a school of languages
here, and her mother is French. Pro
fessor and Mme. Colin speak nearly all
the Continental lunguages, and their
daughter comes naturally by her legiti- :
mate gift. She has hnd very little in- j
struction; in fact, her father has never j
given her serious attention in tho matter I
of languages, though he began giving her j
lessons somo months ago in Yolapuk. ;
Then he changed his mind and dropped
the Yolapnk, not caring to tax her brum j
too much. She grasped the rudiments of I
the universal lauguago with astonishing '
rapidity and ease, and in the short time J
she was under instruction became sutti- !
ciently learned to carry on a conversa
tion. A correspondent called upon the little i
lady at the residuero of her parents iu !
Cass street. It was the proper hour for j
calling eight o'clock. Corinne is a lovely
child, small for her age, it may be suid, j
with black hair and eyes and a French
cast of features. She sat down after a I
salutation aud took her doll in her arms, j
"This is my youngest doll," sho said,
"though it is tho biggest." Shewasnot !
entirely satisfied, evidently, that this was
as it should be. "I have two others. ;
This one came about Christmas." ,
Corinne loves poetry and can quote .
from Victor Hugo, Goethe, Heine and
Longfellow. Her mother said she often j
re id the poets to the child and could not j
have a more attentive listiucr. AVip l rk i
Herald,
Cigars for a Iioyul Ituby.
The baby King of Spain received as a '
New Year's gilt from Havana, Cuba, a j
large chest filled with tho finest cigurs. j
They were thought to be of chocolate, as
they should have been for so small a sjieci-
meu of royalty, but they were found to j
be real substantial rolls of weed of the ,
most exquisite kind. The letter from,
the donor said: "These cigars are made !
of weeds such as will grow not more thau
once every twenty years. Let them be I
preserved, therefore, when King Alfonso ,
XIII. will make his first uttempt at j
smoking, which ought uot to be made
more uuplcuatit to him by having to ,
smoke an inferior sort of tobacco." 1
Frozen Fish.
Frozen fish are imported into Mar
seilles by a society formed for the pur
pose. A steamer lately brought there
some thirty-six tons of frozen fish in its
hold, the temperature of which hud been
kept at about freezing point by means of
a muchiue evaporating sulphuric acid.
The fish are caught witn tho net in va
rious parts of the Mediterranean and At
lantic. After arrival they are dispatched
by night in a cold chamber. Experiment
has shown that fish can be kept seven or
eight months at low temperature with
out the lea-t change. Vh 'v.uju Herald.
A Leap Year Story.
IsSS.
Crispy is the air!
l.euu year, we would state,
Berk the millionaire;
Courtiu' time, my dear I
1SS9.
A fortune she lms sought,
Wedding very tine;
Millionaire been cuUKht,
Caught in time, my dear!
UoodaXVt Sun.
BOWSER'S FIRE ESCAPE.
BIS DISASTROUS TRIAL OF THE
NEW APPARATUS.
Btrs. Ilotspr I) -scribes Her Worscr
Hair Latest Etperlment His
Ardor Cured by a Fall.
The other afternoon an exprcssm&n
delivered at the house several strr :e
packages, and when Mr. Bowser came
up in the evening he explained that they
were fire escapes.
" What for ("
"For the house, of course.''
" But we don't need any fire ecaps
On our house, Mr. Bowser."
" Don't we ? Well, we shall have
them just the same. If you want to be
burned I have no objection, but I propose
to die some other way."
" You never said there was any dan
ger." " Because I didn't want to make you
nervous. As a matter of fact I haven't
felt safe any night for a year.,"
"And now the danger Will bn obvi
ated ?"
" It will be reduced to the minimum,
certainly. Even if we wake up nnd
find our bedroom on fire we shall be nble
to escape with only a scorch."
After supper he carried the pu reels up
stairs. There were several bottles and a
couple of wire racks, a hand tire extin
guisher, and a rope and pully and other
stuff.
" Where would a fire be liki ly to start
in the house? '' 1 asked Mr. Bowser ns he
was fixing a hook in the casing of our
bedroom window.
" Down stairs, proba' ly."
"Well, we have a front aud back stairs,
and here are t hi ee chamber windowsopi n
ing out on veranda roofs. Couldn't we
escape by some of these ways? "
"If I thought we could would I befool
enough to go ami throw away $'W on this
appa at is?" he angrily demanded.
" 1 1 suppo-eyou know best."
" Mrs. Bowser, when I don't know best
I will resign. While you have never
given the subject of lirc-cscape one sin
gle thought, I have devoted years of
study to it. Take our wall-eyed ailing
and go down stairs, and when I w ant ou
I will call."
In about nn hour he called. He wus in
great good-nature. lie had the hook
firmly in place, and hanging to it was n
rope and some sort of harne s.
" It isn't much of an ornament to our
bedroom," I ventured to observe.
"What has ornament got to do with
fire-escapes? Isn't your life worth more
to you than the daily presenile of a lea
store chromo? The escape is now ready."
"For what:"
"To escape by, of course. Here is
the situation : It is midnight. The cook,
while rumaging about in search of her
lost quid of gum, bos dropped lighted
matches under the front ami back stairs.
The flames hate been smouldering for
hours. They now break forth with sud
den fury, cutting off our escape from
either stairs."
"And we crawl out on the veranda
roofs."
"Do we? Not much 1 Westarttodo
so, but we find that all the verandas have
fallen to the ground, the supports buy
ing been heaved out by the frost."
"Well?"
"Well, we awake with the crackle of
flames iu our ears. While you wring
your hands and declare that we are lost,
I calmly secure all the money, jewelry
nnd valuable papers and coolly make
preparations to escape. 1 calmly pull
down the rope and harness, scat you and
the baby therein, and the next moment
you are landed on the ground. 1 follow
just as the engi ues arrive, and the paiers
of tho next morning chronicle my won
derful self-possession in the face of awful
danger "
"And can you go down by that rope
and harness?"
"Can 1 1 Can you chop wood with an
ax? What is it for except to go down
on?"
"I would almost as soon be burned up
as to try it. I don't believe you would
dare to go down on it."
".Mrs. Bowser, what a wife believes
and what a husband knows are two dif
ferent things. Is it likely that I would
purchase this apparatus and put it up
here if I didn't dure use it? Shove up
that window !"
"But 1 wouldn't try it. You are rather
clumsy, you know?"
"Another insult ! Shove up that win
dow I"
I put up the sash aud he seated him
self iu the harness, sat down on the sill
und grusped the rone over his head, and
with a look of disdain in his eyes he
swim; himself off. A wild howl rent
the air, followed by the thud of some
thing striking the eurth, and I looked
out to see .Mr. Bowser lying iu a heap be
low the window. I ran down and out
us soon as possible, and after seven or
eight minutes he was able to limp into
the house with me.
"Mr. Bowser, are you much hurt?" I
I asked.
Ho glared at me but did not reply.
"I told you I thought it dangerous."
"Mrs. Bowser!'' he huskily began as
he lumped down on the sofa, "this is the
beginning of the end!".
'"What do you mean?"
"1 mean you have made the last at
tempt on in y life you'll ever have a
chance to! You hounded me for weeks
and weeks to .'ct this fire-escape, and
you meant my death by a full!"
"Why, Mr. Bowser!"
"Say uo morel I saw it iu your eyes
us you poshed me off the sill! To-iuor-row
we separate!"
But when the morrow came hesneuked
up and removed the apparatus and
pitched it into the alley, and fire escapes
haven't been referred to since. Utinit
Free ,,.
Artificial Incubation lu Egypt.
One of tho oldest industries in Egypt
is artificial eg; hatching, principally en
gaged iu by Copts. here are said to
be iOU establishments of this nature in
the country, and production of chickens
f mill the oveus is estimated at from lu,
0(10,000 to 12,000,0(10 annually. The
season for incubating lasts through
tin ee months of the early summer. The
country people bring eggs to the pro
piictorsuf the "furroogs," and give two
good egis for every newly hatched chick.
Scientific Ameri'iiii.
The City of Mexico levies u tax on bull
tights at fifteen per cent, of the gross
receipts. ,
H0USEHOLT? AFFAIRS.
Break 1 n k df liam'p Chimneys.
The breaking of latrip chimneys is
mainly due to unequal expansion, and
some one suggests a remedy. Are yoil
the fortunate possessor of a diamond
ring ? Make It useful as well as orna
mental by cutting with it straight, per
pendicular marks at short distances all
round the bulging part of your chim
ney before Using it at all. These cuts
will give the glass thfl necessary room
for expansion and contraction When too
quickly heated or cooled and prevent it
cracking; but if, like myself, you have
fio diamonds (except those of the Hoinan
matron) you may toughen it in this way:
Place It in a tin pall (for protection) and
immerse it entirely in your cook stove
reservoir in the morning when the water
is cold, let It remain throughout tho en
tire day while the water is hottest, and
the following night, during which it will
slowly cool. When removed in the
morning it will be found almost proof
against cracking from heat or cold.
Then in cleaning don't use soapsuds,
which are apt to make it more breakable
and in time less clean, but, if badly
smoked, first removed the soot with a
dry brush or swab, then place the chim
ney upright in your sink, and pour over
It briskly boiling hot water. Alta Cnli'
fornia.
Oatmeal Ab-oad.
In making oatmeal por.-idge, the meal
is stirred into boiling water with a por
ridge stick, whi'e the wnter is kept all
the time at a brisk boil. Care should be
taken to prevent the meal from forming
knots, as it will do if dropped into the
water in too large quantities. The best
way is to take a handful of the meal aud
let it drop into the receptacle by the
rubbingof the thunibauainst the fingers.
At first the water will show ebullition or
boiling up Boon after the meal begins to
go into it, and this will be kept up until
about the time when enough of the meal
has been added. Fine meal is more likely
to knot than the course meal. It ta'cs
experience to tell when just the amount
of meal needed has been used, the thick
ness of the porridge being the test. No
measurement of wafer or meal will do.
The oatmeal may be stirred in cold water
before cooking, but this makes moro
labor, and the cooking is not so well done
as in the other way. But if the cold
water mixing is resorted to, the meal
should be ground to the finest flour.
If any other meal is mixed with cot
meal, as is sometimes done, rice meal is
regarded as the best, though barley, bean,
pea and wheat meals may be used. Only
a small quantity of tho rice meal should
be used, but straight oatmeal would be
preferred by the true lover of this cereal.
Acidity is developed when oatmeal is
soaked in water for n few days, and this
meal makes the " flummery " of the oat
meal districts of England, Scotland and
Ireland.
Recipes.
Muffins; One egg, one cup sugar, one
third cup butter, one-half cup milk, salt,
spices, one teaspoon baking powder and
flour to make a batter. Bake in a hot
oven.
Pickled Fish: Spice the vinegar, cook
ing the spices in a bag. When hot put
the fish in ancl let it boil slowly until ten
der. Take out carefully and lay away in
a stone jar.
Cocoanut Cookies: Three cups of sugar,
one cup of sweet milk, two eggs, one
cup of grated cocoanut, two teaspoonfuls
of baking powder, flour enough to miike
a dough ; roll out, cut in shape and bake.
To make mock mince pies take one cup
of vinegar, two of wuter, one cup of
molasses, one cup of chopped raisins,
two cups of bread crumbs, one-half cup
of butter, two eggs, spices to suit the
taste. Bake with two crusts.
Chocolate Jelly: Take seven spoonfuls
of grated chocolate, the same of white
sugar, one cup of sweet cream ; mix to
gether nnd set over the tire and let como
to a boil. Pour it over cornstarch pud
ding or put between layers of cuke.
Buttermilk Cake: One cup of butter
milk, one lurgo cup of sugar, two-thirds
cup of shortening, two eggs and one tea
spoonful of soda. Flavor to taste. By
putting in mixed spices it makes a good
spice cuke, and I sometimes put iu a cup
of raisins.
Browc Bread: One pint each of Indian
meal aud rye meal, oue-hulf pint of wheat
flour, one-half cup of molasses, one
tablespoonful of salt, two-thirds of a cup
of yeast and one pint of hot wafer; mix,
let it rise, steam three or four hours and
brown the top a little in thu oven.
Mackerel Balls : l.ef the fish slaiul in
the water over night; in the morning
pour some boiling wuter over it; pic k it
carefully from the bones, and udd mi
equal quantity of cold mushed potatoes,
two beaten egi;s and a pinch of pepper.
Shupe into bulls und fry in hot butter.
Plum Pudding: One pint of chopped
suet, one pint of tart apples, one pint of
raisins, one pint of currants, one-hull'
tiint of sweet milk, one cup of citron;
leut eii;ht eggs and mix with the above,
and add sullicicnt flour to make it stick
together; boil three hours in a cloth bag
and serve with sauce.
Corned Beef: Boil until soft enough
to remove the bones; place in an earthen
dish and pour over it the wuter it wus
boiled iu. Place a plate on it and u heavy
weight; huve sullicicnt wuter, so that
when the weight is on it w ill come to
the top of the meat; let it stand until
Cold, then cut in slices.
For Charlotte llu-se, dissolve one
third of a box of gelatine in a pint of hot
water. One pint of sweet cream beuten
to a froth, flavor with vanilla and
sweeten to taste; when cool mix gelatine,
cream, sugur und flavoring together.
Line a gluss dish with sponge cuke and
pour the mixture over it.
Kaied DoUL'hnuts A little less thuii
one half cup of melted lard rubbed into I
one cup of sinrur, one cup of warm sweet j
milk, one ball cup nt yeast, one cgu,
one hull teapooiiful of baking soda, a
little salt and iiiitinegor cinnamon; let it
rise till light, then turn out on a warm
douh board, but do not roll at all; let it
rise till light, then fry.
Palatable desserts i an be made of stale
cuke; sponge cuke is best, but it is
cheaper and healthier to wrap a cloth
around it and steam it or to teed it to
the chickens. Lovers of rich desserts
w ill like w hipped cieuiu, swecti ucd and
highly flavored with rose wuter or
pineapple, poured over the take. Thi
con be kept three diiys in a ice box.
IN THB BLIZZARD.
The sun shone fair in the clear, crisp ahr
Dakota, at her best,
In winter array is cold, they say, If tried by
an Eastern test
But Chambers was a Western man, on th
frontier used to roam,
And his boys went along, with a lausi aad
song, to help drive the cattle home.
The old man's eye canght the gleam on high
of a sullen, yellow clond,
And lo, the light faded out from the sky, and
far on the prairie a lond
Fierce roar was heard, and with never a
word, save "Home, while the storm al
lows!" He sped one boy back, while he kept tha
track with the other lad and the cows.
The air filled up like a froisen cup, each drop
had the point of a thorn,
Each gasp for breath seemed certain death ; it
grew black, though the hour was morn!
They staggered on with faces wan and cour
age grown almost cold ;
"Lie down, my son, my darling son, and this
coat about you fold."
But the man in anguish walked np and down
and tumbled at last to his knees
For the coat that wrapped the boy so warm
left the father bare to freeze
And he felt the cold hand at his heart. "Up,
np, my boy, I say;
Kneel for a moment by my side and let ma
hear you pray."
Their prayers went straight to heaven's gate,
and at dawn the faithful hound
Bayed for the rescue till the boy by tender
hands was found.
His father low la the drifted snow lay stiff,
and yet still he smiled
As though in death he seemed to know he had
died to save his child!
John Paul Boeock.
HUMOR OF THE DAY.
Sign for a m-ncy lender Lucre here!
Gentlemen learning the cornet should
employ private footers.
Miss Columbia was the first girl to get
a New Jersey. 1'ittsburg Chronicle.
An awkward waiter frequently plays
the deuce with the tray. Hotel Mail.
The pen is a mighty engine, and it
sometimes runs away with the engineer.
Chicago Time'.
The barber's Is a strange profession.
You seldom see one that is not at the
head. St.tti$inan.
Says tho New Haven Xie: "A foot
rule wear overshoes." We should call
that a two-foot rule. Norriitoirn Il raUI.
When Dakota becomes a State it will
doubtless adopt as its coat-of-arms an
ear-muff coucharft and a shiver rampant.
Graphic.
To bashful correspondent The first
thing for you to do is to pop the question,
tho second to question the pop. Bur
UnjlonFree Press.
When Grecian athletes sought the field
And nobly fell, in bravery utter,
They brought them home upon their shield
They bring them home now on a shutter.
Detroit Free Yes.
We don't know whether to believe the
story that Mr. Ho wells replied to a person
w ho asked for a list of the best hundred
books: "I have not written a hundred
books." Life.
A girl who weighs 120 pounds and has
30,000 in her own right, no matter how
homely, unattractive or cross-tempered
she may be. is worth her weight iu gold.
litnton CourUr.
Tho Boston TraiiKript knows of an
erudito clergymen who spoke of the un
fortunate woman of Sodom as "Lot's
lady who was transformed intqji w?j
litu of chloride of sodium.'
Their chaste salutes are not misplaced
When women kiss a friend or brother;
But of life's honey what a waste
There is when women kiss each other.
lloston Courier.
Deucon Jones (to minister) "Tho col
lection this morning, .Mr. Goodman, was
grutilyingly large." Minister "Yes,
deacon, 1 noticed quite a number of
strangers among the congregation."
Kpocli.
Husband (groaning) "The rheuma
tism iu my leg is coming on again."
Wife (with sympathy) "tih, I urn so
sorry, John. I wunted to do some shop
ping to-day, and that is a sure sign of
rain." Kfiueh.
A lover who addressed a love-scented
letter to the object of his affections, ask
ing the youug lady to become his partner
through life, inscribed on one corner of
tho envelope, "Sealed proposals." The
result wus lie was awarded the contract.
A note from a rurul postollice in Ten
nessee reads: "Dear : The reuson
I did n't luff when you laft at me in the
Post Ollis yesterday wus because I had a
bile on my fuse and knn't luff. If 1 latl
she 'II bust. But I love you, bile or no
bile, luff or no laff."
Nothing Serious. Miss Clara (to
Feathe.rly, who is making an evening
call) "Poor little Bobby swallowed a
penny to day.and we've all been so much
worried about it." Featherly (somewhat
at a loss for words of encoiirgcmcnt )
"Oh, I er - wouldn't worry, Mi Clura;
a peuny is not much." Uai)nr't Jltuur.
The way some lovers cough and hem,
Aud Ht-ein to lost their hrcultl, uhu!
You'd be inclined lo pily them.
Thinking their trouble is the ut.lhiua.
Th way some iiiaideiisetnigh and hem.
You'd think their trouble is the asthma;
But 'tis not that which does ail them,
They're only troubled with the "ask mat"
UoodaW Hun.
How a Woman Saws.
When a woman her home would decorate, i
hhe stojn not at ol-.tucles, small or great;
Hut the fiiiiiiie.-.t sight that hereHorUi alford
Is when she ierfoi'ius with a saw on a board.
With her knee on a plunk, and the plonk on
a chair,
She poises iter saw with a know in air.
Makes several dives ut the iuciled line,
And is oft' with a w liU the reverse of flue.
With ll conn messed, she bends down to the
work.
And crosses the timber with a jei kety-jerk;
(She can't keep the hue, aud her knee sh
itskevv.
Hut she kit'i-s to her work till the board splite
m two.
fche has damaged the chair, she boa ruined
the saw ,
Her buck is all aching, her nuiid.., Uh, ai
luw,
And she tiuds, wheu to tit now the piunk she
tries.
It falls ui inch short ot the requisite m.e
fittibui a Cttivmclt-Teityraih.