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THE FOREST REPUBLICAN
Ii published every Wednesday, bf
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Otfloe in Bmearbaugh & Co.'a Building
ELM STREET, TI ON EST A, Pa.
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VOL. XIX. NO. 39.
TIONESTA. PA, WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 26, 1887.
$1 50 PER ANNUM
"Within three months not less than sixty-two
companies for mining and smelt
ing have been organized, and mills, ma
chine shops, railway companies, foun
dries, cotton, flour and other manufac
tories havo been constructed in the
South.
The largest pension ever paid out to a
single person in Philadelphia has recent
ly been handed to Josiah Brincard. The
sum reaches over f 10,000. The pension
has been underway for over nineteen
years, and the beneficiary is both blind
and a cripple.
Colonel Ward Lnmon, the lawjiartner
of President Lincoln, who took the claim
of the Choctaw Nation on speculation
and got a judgment in their favor of
$2,500,000, received a fee of $250,000.
This thows that the law is sometimes a
paying profession.
The applications of electricity become
more varied every day. Air-pressure,
heat, steam pressure and water stages at
distant points 'tiro now recorded by its
use, and now a California electrician has
invented a process whereby gold, silver
and copper can bo instantly smelted by a
lightning stroke.
The heavy feeding and deep drinking
characteristics of thA English dinner of
years ago is said to ifc rapidly disappear
ing and with them much of the gout and
indigestion that have been regarded as
national complaints. The- change is as
cribed to the impression made on the
public of late years by hygicnists, schools
of cooking and education generally.
Pastoral pursuits have been the largest
factor of Australia's commercial pros
perity. The stock landed by the first
fleet, in 178$, consisted only of a bull,
four cows and a calf, one stallion, three
marcs and three colts, with a few coarse
wooled sheep, pigs and goats; in 1885,
ninety-seven years later, there were reck
oned to be as many as D,000,000 horned
cattle, 1, 300,000 horses, 80,000,000 sheep,
and 1,000,000 swine.
.The Dry- Goodi Chronica reports that
a noble-minded merchant of world-wide
luaintauce, long years of experience,
i vast wealth honorably accumulated,
a aaked how many dishonest men in
i cantile lifo ho had met with during
long and varied career. Said he: ''I
traded with most all the civilized
s of the earth, and in aUmy long and
ied commercial experience, in which
re often than otherwise the honor of
j man was my only protection, I found
it two or three men whom I considered
unatcly dishonest. These men would
havo remained the same in principle had
they been engaged in any other vocation
of lifo."
Of Oscar Wilde it is related that at
the christening of his infant son, he was
railed on to furnish the baby's name, but
for some reason or other he fell such a
responsibility to be greater than he
chose to assume, and declined respond
ing to the parson's appeal. The latter,
In no wiso disconcerted, promptly took
the matter in his own hands, and de
clared '-John" to be the boy's name.
Roused from hi3 indifference by his off
spring's deadly peril, Mr. Wilde found
strength to rush forward and murmur
softly: "Cyril," and then fall back ex
hausted from the intensity of his emo
tions. The baby is saved, however, and
John is not his name.
In some reminiscences of Henry Ward
Beecher a writer for the New York Timet
gays: ."It is Mr. Beecher's boast that he
'never wore a dress coat. He wears his
every day suit of black broadcloth
wherever he goes, and though ho may
be as he often is the only man among
two hundred or three hundred banquet
ers not attired in the regulation evening
dress, nobody would notice any incon
gruity, Beecher's strong personality
completely overshadows such petty de
tails as dress. About three years ago a
big dinner was given at Delmonieo's by
the Chamber of Commerce, at which
there were present President Arthur,
General Grunt, Governor Cleveland, and
the Governors of ten other States. The
affair was intended to be very '-swell,"
and so it was. Mr. Beecher arrived late,
and a few of his friend could not help
noticing that he had paid less attention
to his toilet than usual. But the sturdy
expounder had no apologies to offer. In
the course of his speech, which was one
of the most eloquent he was ever heard
to litter, he expluiued that he had just
come from his farm at Pcekskill and had
hurried to catch the train. The charm
of his oratory set the company wild with
enthusiasm, and at the finish, after tho
cheering and waving of hankcrchiefs and
napkins had ceased. General Grant
clasped the speaker's had and in tonci of
genuine admiration said: ".Mr. Beecher,
I don't know what kind of a farmer you
are, but as a talker you are 'some pump
kins.' "
IN EXILE.
I soe a fireside far away;
I count eaoh dear, accustomed chair,
The gentle glance, the faces gay
I see it all, and would be there.
The children climb their father's knees;
The mother 6trokes hor baby's har;
In happly groups ot twos and throes
They lnugh and chat would I were theral
The lamp its mellow radiance sheds;
The firelight flickers softly where
Two lit tle brown and golden beads
Are lowly bout at evening prayer.
What of the lonoly leagues botweenf
I soe it plain Isonitfairl
I see, who am myself unseen
For oh! my bomosk-k heart is there!
Anna F. Burnham,in Gooilloxtteketp
inq. A CALICO FROCK.
BY CF.onOE M.VTtTIAL.
It wasn't a hot day, nor a cold day,
nor a damp day, but it was nn atrocious
day, a clammy day, an unbearable day,
a day that made your clothes stick to
you like poor relations, that brought out
cold sweats on pitchers and goblets, that
made your back a racc-courso lor con
tcmptiblc little chills and tho rest of
your body a tnrget for a thousands in
visible pins and needles, that made the
grasshopper a burden and the dusty, be
grimed city a pandemonium, that made
Solomon Griggs, bachelor, of tho firm of
Griggs, Makuin JcCo., the great clothing
merchants, shut up hi ledger with a
bang and start for the country by the
next train, remarking to old Grimesby,
tho head cloik, "lliat the city was
stifling." To which that worthy replied
"So it is, but how about the feller that
can't get out of it aud must stay to be
choked!" a problem which I suspect
our friend of tho firm of Griggs, Makem
& Co. troubled his head very little about,
being just then busy in looking into the
dusty recesses of that picture gallery
which memory furnishes and arranjres
for us' all, as a single Inndscape hanging
there. A low house with mossy, over
hanging cave, standing on the slope of
a green hill, shaded by branching elms,
with level fields stretching oil in tho
foreground toward tho sparkling water
on one side and dusky woods on the
other, and there, dusty, sweating and
tired, Solomon found himself just about
sunset. Out came a ruddy-cheeked.
smiling old lady in a cap and apron, that
had attained a state of snowy perfection
unknown to city laundresses.
"Why, bless me if it isn't little Sol
Why, who'd a thought of seeing you?"
and she folded the stalwart bearded
man in as warm an embrace as though
he were in reality still tho little Sol of
former days.
"And how do you do, Sol f Come in,
come in ; don't stand out there, You
know the little path and the way to the
pantry yet, I dare say. Come in ; you
needn t start back its only Fachel.
"But 1 didn't know you had any young
ladies with you. Aunt Hester."
"It's only Bachcl, I tell you Rachel
Hart, the seamstress. Are there no
women in your city, that you are afraid
to face a little country girl
"Little indeed," thought Solomon, as
he acknowledged his uunt's somewhat
peculiar introduction and not pretty,
either with large eyes cf that uncertain
gray that sometimes beams darkly blue
and then deepens into brown; with
smooth, low forehead and light brown
hair drawn tightly across each ear, just
revealing its crimson tips; a face irrcgu
larly featured, und rendered still more
striking by the singular contrast be
tween its extreme pallor and the intense
ly scarlet lips the personification of
neatness, the embodiment ot reserve.
"An odd little person," thought Solo
mon, "but it 8 none of my business!
and dismissing her from his mind, he
proceeded to the much more important
Dusimssof making himself perceptible
at Aunt Hester's tea table. -
Salomon did amp e justice to the
snowy bread, golden butter and luscious
strawberries, und later, as that worthy
was indulging in a stroll across the
fields, he lifted up his eyes, and beheld
the litflo senmstress, whose existence he
had quite forgotten, under a venerable
cherry tree, making dcsperite efforts to
seize a tempting branch on its lowest
boughs looking almost pretty with her
flushed cheeks und sparkling eyes.
Now Sol was a gallaut man decided
ly the jpreux chevalier of the firm of
Griggs', Makem & Co. ; so that whenever,
as had once or twice happened, a petti
coat ventured into the mouldy shades of
that establishment fcol was the man
whom destiny and the other partners se
lected to parley with the enemy.
Advancing, therefore, with a happy
mixture of confidence and condescension,
Sol plucked the cherries and was about
to present them when independence in a
.. - , , i ...
calico irocK stepped oat-n wnu a cooi: i
"Keep them yourself, sir; I don't care
for them.''
"I thought you wanted thetn!" stam
mered Sol.
"So I did, because they wero difficult
to obtain. Had they been on your aunt's
table, 1 would not have touched them.
It is the glow of triumph that gives a
pleasure to its est. t at the cherries
yourself, and good evening, sir."
"Stop a moment!" said Sol, not a lit
tle astonished; "that is I mean per
mit me to accompauy you!"
"No, you would expect me to enter
tain you, and thut would be too much
trouble."
"But if, instead, I should entertain
youf"
"You cannot."
"Why?"
"You could tell me nothing new. You
are only a crucible for converting bales
of cloth into the precious ore that all the
world goes mad after. No doubt you
are all very well in your way, but there
vre alchemists who could transmute our
humdrum daily life into golden verse or
heavenly thought. To auch a one I
might listen; but you and I nave noti
ng in common."
Not even our humanity?' asked Sol
omon.
The stem face of the young girl soft
ened a little, but only for a moment.
No:' she answered, angrily, "not
even that. I, you know, am made oi
the inferior clay you of the pure porce
lain. J io you not remember now even
good, kind Aunt Hester told you there
were no young ladies with her, only the
seamstress, You aro slightly bored ai
ready,and think me odd enough to amuse
you for a while : but if some of these gay
ladies among whom I hew you are such
a favorite wero to come here, yon would
not even know- me. Good evening, sir."
What a furious little radical,"
thought Sol, with an uneasy laugh, as he
watched her rctieating tigure. After
all, he was not quite sure that she had
nut spoken the truth.
II tiio calico frock had been a llounccd
silk, for instance, how
many degrees
more deferential would have been his
manner in presenting the cherries?
Ouery tho sec onu :
If the calico frock had been walking
down Broadway about 4 o'clock in the
afternoon, would he, Solomon Griggs, of
Griggs, Makem & Co., ns willingly escort
it as across those green heiris where, ii
the robins and bluebirds did make re
marks, it was in their own language?
Sol couldn't answer the questions sat
isfactorily, but he went to bed and
dreamed nil night of the little Diogenes
m her calico frock
Thut week and the next week he
waited patiently for the first glimpse of
that remarkable garment coming around
the corner, but m vain. And when, m
such a very careless manner that it was
quite remarkable, ho wondered audibly
"wucro mat ouu nine gin uvea wuom
he saw ou the eve of his arrival," Aunt
Hester answered, dryly; "Away up
thcicabouts," pointing with her hand
she boarded, she believed, with some
queer sort of folks there; though, for
that matter, she was queer enough her
self. And this was absolutely all she
would say on the subject
The next day Sol took it upon himself
to -wander up that way, "thereabouts,"
and was rewarded -with a glimpse of the
calico frock going through a broken
gate; and, following it closely, came up
with the wearer as sho was about to
enter tho dilapidated front door, at
which piece of impertinence she was so
much incensed as to turn very red, while
tears actually started to her eyes,
"What do you want!" she asked
sharply enough.
To soe you!-' replied Sol, who, taken
by surprise, could think of nothing but
the truth.
"Well, you have seen me now go?"
"But it's a warm day, and lam very
tired !"
"I can't help that. It's not my fault
-Ms itr"
"You might ask me to walk in and sit
down, if you were not as hard hearied as
a Huron! '
"This is not my house."
"You would then, if it were?"
'I don't say that."
"Well, then, I am thirsty give me
class of water."
"There is the well, and an iron cup
fastened to it by a chain, help your
self.
' "You inhospitable little misan
thrope! "
"But she was gone; and the next time
he inquired for her, Aunt Hester told
him, with a malicious twinkle of tho eye
that she was cone to the city
Perhaps the good soul had been
troubled with visions of a future Mr
Griggs, and was not altogether displeased
that on insurmountable barrier was
placed between "that odd Bachel Hart
und her nephew Sol, who was a good
boy, but didn't know the ways of
women."
Be that as it may. her joy was shortly
turned into mourning, for Solomon re.
ceived dispatches requiring his immedi
ato presence in tho city. At least so he
said, for Aunt Hester was immovable in
her conviction that "that Bachel was
somehow at the bottom of it." She even
hinted sis much to Solomon when he bade
her good-bye; but he only laughed, and
told her to take care of herself.
After all, business could not have been
io very pressing, as ho spent the greater
portion of his time wandering through
lanes and back streets, not unfre puently
dushinc down alleys with the inexplica
ble exclamation of "That's her?" from
whence he always returned very red in
the face and sheepish in expression.
Three months had passed away, when
he nearly ran against a little woman,
who looked up in his face with a sar-
I dome smile.
I "Your eyesight is not so good in the
I city, Mr. criggs. You don't know me
here."
i "Bachel! Miss Hart, I have been
looking for you everywhere. I I
j where do you live?"
I She hesitated a moment, then said
! nh'.rtly : "Come and see." And turning,
led the way through narrow streets, reck-
! ing with tilth und teeming with a wretch-
; ed p 'pulution, up a tiight of broken
stairs, into a dingy little room, whose
only redeeming feature was its perfect
' clcunliness.
I "Will you bo seated, .Mr. Griggs?" she
'. asked with a scornful smile. "Now that
i you know my residence, I trust thut I
may have the pleasure of seeing you
frequently."
"And you live in this den!" asked
Solomon, heedlessly of her sarcasm.
"How do you support yourself!''
"By my needle."
"And how much does it take to keep
up this magnilicent stlo of living?"
"By unremitting exertion I can earn
two dollars a week."
"Great heavens I why didn't you come
to me?'
"F or two excellent reasons: First. I
should not have known where to have
found you; second, I should not have
come if I had."
Of course not. Your pride is to you
meat and drink. Still you might havo
come. We are in want of hands."
"I do not believe it. You wish to
cheat mo into accepting alms."
"I here is our advertisement, read it
for yourself 1" pulling a paper from his
pocket.
The sunken eyes gleamed eagerly sue
was human after all, and was even then
suffering the pangs of hunger.
'Mr. Uriggs, 1 believe you nre a good
man," she said, bursting into tears. "I
will work for you gladly. I am starv
ing.' And she did work, early and late, spite
of Solomon's entreaties, refusing to ac
cept anything but her wages, declining
to receive his visits, sending back his
cifts, steadily refusing above all to bo-
come his wife, though she softened won
derfully toward him.
"ou are rich 1 am poor!" sue saia,
in reply to his passionate arguments.
You are handsome I am ugly; the
world would laugh and your fumily be
justly offended!"
I have no family, and as tor the
world, let it laugh; I dare be happy in
spite of it."
"I will not havo you."
"Do you not love me?"
"I will not have you," and with that
answer Solomon was obliged to rest con
tented. Timo passed on a financial crisis
came, and with hundreds of others down
went tho house of Griggs, Makem A: Co.
holoraon sat in his oilico gloomily
brooding over his ruin, gloomily think
ing of tho woman whose love he had so
long and fruitlessly striven to win, dark-
v wondenno: if it were not better to cut
short an aimless, hopeless, blighted life.
In the little drawer on the right lay a
bracj of pistols, a present from young
makem when he went to Uaiilomia.
Solomon took them out they were load
ed it was but to raise them so, adjust
the trigger so, and
".Lady wants to see you, sir."
"Can't see her, sir. What can a
woman want here? Shut the door; if
any one calls, say I'm out."
Once more he took up the pistol, but
this time it dropped from his nerveless
hand, for a pair of arms were round his
neck and two clear gray eyes looked
lovingly in his, while the voice that was
sweetest to him whispered to him softly:
"When you were rich, I rejected you.
Now that you are poor I came to ask if
you will take me?"
And Solomon, like a sensible man, put
up the pistols and took tho "calico
frock" instead. Nea York Mercury.
Andrew Johnson's Grave.
On a large, round hill beyond the
town of Greenville, Tenn., stands his
monument an octagonal monolith of
white marble, mounted on a pedestal of
solid stone which rets upon a substruc
ture of gray granite, comprising a double
arch, with an opening beneath. Upon
the top an eagle, with outspread wings,
is hovering, and catching in his great
claws the exquisite carvings of the mar
ble flag which is folded about the top of
the shaft with its stars and stripes. Just
below a half-unrolled scroll, beautifully
defined, with the words "Constitution
of the United States" standing forth in
bold letters, while just under it is an
open volume, upon which rests a right
hand. On each side of this is a stand of
pyramidal marble supporting large
curved vases of the same material, filled
with flowers, the chiselings of which
cannot be surpassed in any land. Be
tween, a little below, is the inscription:
: Andiikw Johnson, :
; eveutoentb Trcsl- '
; dent of the ;
: United Mutes, :
Itorn Dec. 29, 1Si8,
; Wed July 81, 1S75. :
; Ilia faith in the poo:
: pie Utivcr wavered :
Eliza Juhnbon,
Born Oct. 4, 1S11,
Died Jan. 15, 1S76.
In memory bf our
1-ATHKH
and
MoTIIKH.
In front of this is a mausoleum of white
marble, mounted by a handsome carved
urn, around which is carved a wreath of
ivy leaves. On the arched side is the in
scription: "Andrew Johnson, Jr., died
March 12, 1871), aged 20 years." At the
foot is written : "To the memory of my
husband." On each side marble pedes
tals resting on the ground support hand
some vases, which display the master
workmanship of the sculptor. To thn
left are two graves, marked by a united
stono curbing, with twin head and foot
slabs. L pon the rst is written :
Robert Johnson, Colonel of the First
Tenu. Cavalry. Uieil April '2, IStl'.i, aged 113
years.
Upon the other:
Charles Johnson, Surgeon of United States
Volunteers. Died April 4, 101, agud &i
years.
A circle of a radius of about twenty
feet incloses the whole with a simple
iron railing. There are no lloweis ex
cept a single fish geranium in a little
stand at the grave of Andrew Johnson
Jr., and a wild sweet. briar rose, which
has entangled itself in the railing, near
which stands a bunch "f mountain
heather with its delicate whito blooms. -i
Mail und Afjires.
A Merchant' Covenant
Nathaniel Hipley Cobb, of Boston, one
of those noble merchants of curlier days,
was generous-hearted und conscientious
to tho highest degree. Ill fact, he was
so benevi-leut that in November, hu
drew up the following remarkable doc
ument :
lly the gra-e of (iol I will never he worth
more than o0,0iHi. lly t.ie grui-e of (tod I
will give one-fourth of tho m-t rotiU ot my
Du--iui.-ss to chuntublo and religious usus. If
1 uiu ever worth ty.'u.iwo 1 will give oue-hulf
my net prolits, aud if I am ever worth
(:KI,IM I will givrt tliren fourths, and the
whole after my fiftieth thousand. No he p
me Clod, or give to a more faithful stowurj
aud set me aside.
.Nov. is-'l. N. H. conn.
He adhered to this covenent with the
stricUat fidelity. Dry (Juv.lt (JlirouUit,
A WONDERFUL LIFEBOAT.
THE CRAFT USED BY AMERICAN
LIFE SAVING CREWS.
It Kichts Itself AVhon Capsized and
nails Itself ont in Heavy Weather
Its Adjuncts.
A beautiful craft is tho lifeboat. Not
so graceful in its proportions as the sail
boat, nor so suggestive of speed as the
stetm yacht, every timber in its body,
every lino in its model speaks ol strength
and ability to ride the waves on its er
rands of humanity. The lifeboat has
character. It is a poem in itself. And
it costs $1,500.
What would you think if a man should
say to you that ke knew where thpre was
a boat which, if capsicd, will right hcr
ce'.f, and which, if filled with water.will
bail herself out! You might not believe
him, but such a craft is tho liicboat
which Captain St. Peter and his crew so
lovingly keep in their bright, c'.can boat
room. The lifeboat what a world of
adventure.danger, struggles, rescues, he
roism, tragedies, does the very word bring
to the mind is twenty-seven feet long,
seven feet broad, nearly four deep, car
ries eight oars, and weighs, when empty,
4,0u0 pounds.
The lifeboat rarely goos over, but when
this accident docs occur sho rights her
self, becauso in her keel there is a slug
of iron weighing 1,400 pounds, this
weight giving to her kocl a constant de
termination toward the water, and be
causo in either end there is an enormous
air-tight bulkhead of cork, nnd ranged
along her sides aro iouixecn oiner air
tight compartments, scientilfcally pro
portioned, giving tho upper portion of
the boat a constant determination or ten
dency to riso from tho water. This is
easily understood. Heavy below und
buoyant on top, of course sho is like a
cat, always sure to alight on her feet.
The self-bailing Is not so easy to under
stand. You would not Hunk that a boat
with seven or eight big holes in her bot
tom would iloat at all, would you? But
that is just tho kind of a craft the life
boat is. Tubes reach right down through
her bottom to the water. In these wells
the water rises from below to the level
of the lake. But it does not rise to tho
deck, because tho deck is always above
tho level of tho lake. With the bo it
plunging into the waves water would, of
course, spout up through the wells and
flood the deck wero thero not a check
valve in each tube, which closes by the
pressure of the water from below. But
when in the surf and waves sweep over
tho craft and fill her shallow dock with
water, what then? Why the water rushes
down thi ough the wells. It does this
because the check-valves open to the
water from above, and becauso the deck
is higher than the level of tho lake.
Water will always sock its level that is,
it will run off if "there is any place it can
run to and this is the principle utilized
in making tho lifeboat kuil herself out.
The lileboat is fitted with every con
ceivable device to secure safety and for
service in aase of disaster. Particular
attention is paid to the stowage of its
ropes, lines aud anchors, extra oars, haw
sers, life-preservers, axes, boat hooks,
etc., these beiug arranged by a strict
method with referenco to e.onomy of
space and facility of use, and always kept
ou board lest some of them should be for
gotten in tho excitement of a sudden
summons for wreck duty. Tho life-nre-servers
used by Captain St. Peter and his
men are the best kn wn. I hey are se
; curely tied round tho body and over tho
shoulders.leavingtho arms free for work.
Kvery man puts on a life-preserver be
fore taking his placu in the boat, aud tho
Captain, who must stand erect in his
position as helmsman, is often compelled
to lash himself to the boat.
"And sometimes," tho grim Captain
adds, "I have to have a mau hold me to
keep me on my feet."
With one of theso big life-preservers
round his body l aptaiu St. Peter could
almost walk the water, like St. Peter of
old, so great is their buoyancy. Tho
lil'c-prcscrvors in common use on steuin
ship's are fiim-y ullairs, made of granu
lated cork sewed up ill canvas. If tho
canvas rips or tears the cork runs out and
tho usefulness of tho preserver is de
stroyed. An invaluable accessory of the lifeboat
is a drag-bag. A drag-bag looks a good
deal like a fisherman's net. Kven a life
boat would bo rather roughly used in
the breakers il it were in t lor the skill
of its crew and the services of this little
bag. Its oilico is almost like that of un
anchor. When the boat is approaching
shore, and the big breakers are rolling
higli and mighty, there is danger that a
great sea wiil lilt the bout li gh ill the
air or throw her upon the beach, or twist
her broadside to and land her a wreck
upon tho shore. I'nder such circum
stances the Captain watches the seas with
an eager eye. .lust before one breaks
over the boat he gives orders to tho man
sitting next him in the stern to heave the
bag. Trailing after the bout the bag in
stantly fills with water, and pulls buck
almost with the power of an anchor well
grounded. The sea tushes by, and then
the Captain orders the trip-line pullo I.
The trip-line is attached to the closed or
rear end of tho bag, and wh -n it is
pulled and the bag reversed, of course it
oilers no further resistance to the water.
hen another henvy sea approaches the
trip-line is played out a.'ain, and uguiu
the bag fills with water und "holds back"
with tremeiidoug power, while tho
breuker rushes harmlessly past tho boat.
The drag-bag is one of the latest devices
adopted by the service, aud its utility
has been proved ou a hundred occasions.
The anchor of tlto lifeboat weighs
pounds, and its cable is sixty fathoms or
litib leet long. Tho heaving line, in
whose uo nvery life-saver is as great an
expert as tho lassoist of the Southwestern
cow country, is 120, feet long, aud Hies
from the Captain's hand to a wreck al
most with the prvcitlon of an w-ru
(JUvij J'traU.
THE RIGHT ROAD.
"I have lost the rond to happlnoss
Poos any one know it, pray?
I was dwelling there when the morn was fair
But somehow I wandered away.
"I saw rare treasures la seenos of pleasures,
And ran to pursue thorn, whon lot
I had lost the path t happiness
And I know not whither to go.
"I have lost the way to happiness
Oh, who will lead me baekP'
Turn off from the highway of selfishness
To the right up duty's track!
Keep straight along and you can't go wrong,
For as sure as you live, I sny,
The fair, lost fields of happiness
Can only bo found that way.
KUa WherWr Wilcox, in the X. V.lForltf.
HUMOR OF THE DAY.
There is no disputing tho fact that the
judge has his share of tho trials of life.
Sterehtint 1'ranler.
To stand well in the eyes of the ladies,
it is only necessary to give them your
seat in a street car. Life.
A poem rerently printed is entitled :
"Smilo Whcnovor You Can." It was
not written by a Prohibitionist, we be
lieve. A'eio York GrafiMc.
An exchange publishes a poem on
"Tho Western Lyre." It's probably
about a man who had some mining share
to sell. Merchant 1'raceler.
More pointed than polite. Wifo "You
haven't been inside a church since wo
wero marriod there!" Husband "No;
a burnt child dreads tho fire." Judge.
The jackass goes by precedent,
Or so his antics teach;
That is to say his argument
Consists iu backward reach.
Sifting.
In the country: "And the air is heal
thy in this villago?" "Excellent, mon
sieur, excellent. One can become a cen
tenarian hero in a little while." French
Fun.
Wild bachelor button is a fashionablo
flower for millinery purposes. We think
there is something wrong about this,
however. W hat innkes the bachelor wild
is that he has no button. Tid-L'iU.
A scientific writer tells how water can
be boiled in a sheet of writingpaper.
We don't doubt it. We have known a
man to write a few lines on a sheet of
writing paper that kept him in hot water
for throe years. liurdette,
"So you think Friday is an unlucky
day, do you, Edith?" "Yes, indeed, I
do, ma'am. "And why do you thihk it
is unlucky?" "Well, you see, wo always
havo fish ou Friday, nnd I just abomi
nate fish." Yonkers Utatttnum.
Barbor "Sir, you're getting bald rap
idly. I have a most excellent remedy."
Old Genleman "Never mind. I'm just
yearning to be entirely bald." "Kht
Why, that's a'reniarkablo desiro." "No,
it isn't. 1've'gct a terribly wicked son,
and I'm determined that hu shan't bring
my gray hairs in sorrow to the grave-"
I'hiUelphla Call.
When "woman rules t'ie roast," good sir
Does she rule it with a pen,
A pencil, chalk or crayon, sirs;
Come, tell us, married meuf
That Is a mooted question, sirs,
but, midst the quarrel's din.
Some rule with rods of iron, sirs,
Some use the rolling pin.
(JuodiiU'B Sun.
Their Toetry.
Any one who has attempted to write
poetry "on time" instead of inspiration
will appreciate the dillicultios of the
member of a certain class in English
composition. On Monday morning the
writer's teacher announced that on the
ensuing Friday each pupil would be ex
pected to bring a verso of original
poetry. The result is appended :
I once di I have a little bo.it,
But ah, 1 haven't gut it uow!
'ihe thing it could not keep alloat,
Hut kept my brothers iu a lion'.
Tho second was on a favorite topic
with poets:
"ljove," sings the jay-bird to his mate,
"Is what all folks should cultivate!"
After a long pause, evidently, thero
was added to this:
I'd druther be a cow or Hen,
Thau earn a liviti' by my lvul
There!
Tho next was excellent, aud to the
point:
Some folks likes lota of poitree;
A little ia euulf for me.
The next is suggostivs of experience:
School school school
I like, I like my school.
Hut do not like not like
No rule but the golden rule.
The grammar suffered in the next, but
it was original:
They Is some eopleiu this world
What isorful Ass;
They'd hustle out the Sun an Mune,
To light the sky with Guss!
Mexico's Silver Wealth.
Charles I.ycll, the eminent geologist,
says that tho interior of Mexico is tho
richest known argentiferous section in
the whole world. The fact was long ago
established thut a metaliferous vein runs
without interruption through tho cntiro
length of tho coidillora of Auahuac, ex
tending from the Sierra .Mad re in Sono
ru, near the northern border, to the gold
deposits of Ouxaca, in the extreme south
of Mexii o. This exhuu-tless vein tra
verses no less than seventeen States, and
siuco tho day of its discovery its mineral
yield has been more than $ I,0i0,ti00,ou0
worth. And yet these valuable sources
of wealth arc estimated to bo more than
I percent, of the undeveloped and un
discovered whole. Mcxito Ttco lU'ub
lici. A Noble Kpitaph.
There passed from earth on a bitter cold day,
Tlio iimu who olt in our otlice would stray,
And Ins noblest epitaph's here, 1 say:
Jlu caused tho door wlieu ho went away."
U'ijoUaU i uo.