THE FOREST REPUBLICAN
Is published every Wednesday, by
J. E. WENK.
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VOL. III. NO. 4.
wui pa mm or aoo:
anonjmoua
TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY. MAY 19.
$1.50 PER ANNUM.
winMiuncaiiona,
Nearly 2, 000, 000, 000 would be dua
were all insured Americans to die at once.
Nearly 11,000,000,000 have already been
paid on death losses Iu America.
Edward Atkinson, the statistician, pre
sents figures showing that the railroads
of tho United States give employment to
050,000 people and transport 400,000,000
tons of freight annually, one half of which
is food and fuel.
The use of the steam-plow is said to bo
diminishing in Great Britain, not be
cause it docs not give good satisfaction,
but because the large farms are being di
vided, and the steam-plow can not be
employed advantageously in small fields.
An episode of Swiss heroism is to bo
solemnly commemorated near Lucerne
this July the sacrifice of Arnold, of
Winkclricd, who at tho battle of Bem
pach threw himself upon the Austrian
spears to encourage his flagging compan
ions, and whoso bravery scoured the vic
tory. The quincentenary of tho battle
will be kept by erecting a commemorative
monument on the field, and the neigh
boring cantons will furnish a grand his
torical procession in the costume of Win
kclricd's times.
Judgo Dyer, of the United Stateg dis
trict court, at New York, in a suit to re
cover $10,000 insurance on the life of a
man who commitcd suicide while insane,
insured in the Accident Insurance Com
pany of North America against injuries
effected by "external, accidental, or vio
lent means," suicide being especially ex
cepted, decides ngainst the company,
holding that in this case the act of sui
cide was no more the man's act in the
sense of the law than if he had been im
pelled by an irresistible physical power.
Ex-Governor Dinglcy, of Maine, is re
sponsible for the assertion that on an W
average each inhabitant of the United
States, outside of Maine, drinks $15
worth of alcoholic stimulants every year.
In fourteen States of tho Union there are
laws which demand that the effects for
alcohol upon the system shall be taught to
children. A graded system of text books
is now ready representing five years of
experimental study of the subject. Be
tween thirty and forty different works on
physio1ogy,with special reference to alco-'
hoi and other stimulants, for school use,
bus been issued.
Of United States Senators in the pres
ent chamber, New York State has fur
nished eight; Ohio, Virginia and Ken
tucky, six each; Massachusetts and
Pennsylvania, five each; Tennessee,
Georgia, North Carolina South Carolina
and Vermont, three each; Delaware,
Indiana, Illinois, Maine, Maryland and
New Hampshire, two each; and Missis
sippi, Alabama. Iowa, Connecticut, Lou
isiana, Michigan, Missouri and Rhode
Island, one each. North Carolina, Penn
sylvania, South Carolina, New Hamp
shire, Delaware, Maine, Maryland, Mass
achusetts, Virginia, West Virginia, Ver
mont aud Tennessee furnish their own
Senators. There are threo of foreign
birth one each from England, Scotland
aud Ireland. There are none of pure
German descent.
A Washington letter to the Louisville
Courier Journal says that "since Mr.
Cleveland entered the White House ho
has gained forty-two pounds in weight.
His rapid increase in weight, considering
his already great physical proportions
when he became President, and consid
ering also tho great mental strain that
his official duties necessarily keep him
under, has led to the remark frequently
of late that he was peculiarly a subject
of apoplectic attack. He greatly resem
bles Mr. Manning in physical propor
tions, barring the dissimilarity in their
size. His neck is very short and thick,
and his breathing is at times labored.
Local physicians have been saying since
Mr.' Manning's prostration that the Presi
dent is almost an ideal subject of apo
plexy and the opinion is common that un
less he shall relax the tension of his exec
utive duties he will within another ' year
become the victim of apoplexy. This
view had been represented to Mr. Cleve
land before Mr. Manning's prostration, but
was treated rather lightly by him. Now,
however, he is reported to be in a more
serious frame of mind about it. It is not
considered likely, though, that these ad
monishers will have great weight. Work
is second nature to the President, and as
long as there is anything undone which
ought to be done, a gentleman who
knows a great deal ubout his private life
tays he would suffer more mental tension
than would be caused by the performance
of the work. The President takes no
exercise whatever, except such as natur
ally falls in his way in his daily routine."
THE STORM-KINO.
Stand back t RUnd back
From my giant track!
6 weep the gray dust from the way I
Bee the pale grass bend!
See the great treos rend I
Hurrah I lam Lord of the day I
I am Master and King
Over everything!
I am monarch, and earth must obey!
Weave me a gown
Of that cloud's black frown,
Which shall keep me warm as I o.
Pluck mo a whip
From the spars of your ship,
And a staff from that forest below.
And this tall church spire
Is the tip I desire
For the arrow I net in my bow.
I am King! I am King I
The wlrile world shall ring
My mad coronation bell!
Citicsaro shaking;
Men's hearts are quaking;
I will govern, oh! strong and well I
I am coming, I come !
Beat, boat the drum !
Let the trumpet my advent tell!
Hurrah! Near and far,
Beneath moon and star
How will I revel at night!
I will build me a Are
Where hills stand higher,
And scream and exalt in it light,
And write out my name
In red letters of flame.
In cowering mortals' sihtl
I hiss and I mutter;
And none knows if I utter
Or Merging, or curse, or prayer.
None knows what I speak, .
Though I storm and, I shriek,
None interprets tho message I bear.
I rave and I rage,
And earth's wisest sage,
Hears no more than the brute in his lairl
I am King! I am King!
And to me one thing
Is beggar or courtier vr pope.
I thread iato rajs
The proudest of flags,
Or the end of the hangman's rope,
I scoff in lords' faces: '
I jeer in high places;
I shout on the graveyard's slope.
Oh, delight! Oh, Joy!
The world is my toy !
Hurrah! I am Lord of the Day I
I rule all alone
On my self-rafcei throne,
And none may dispute my sway I
Then stand back I Stand bock 1
Sweep the dust from my track!
Iam Monarch, and Earth must obey I
-Orace D. Litchfield, in Independant.
A HUMAN WRECK.
"Do you feo that beggar over there?"
asked Operator Charles Smith, of the
Battery Ship News office, of a New York
Mail and Krprem reporter, as ho pointed
to an old, long-haired tramp, who was
standing under the elevated railroad
station. "I'll tell you his romantic life
as I heard it from an officer of the police
boat Patrol. In 1800, a man named
George F. Duncan was the proprietor of
four hat manufacturing establishments
in Philadelphia. He was about twenty
seven years old, married to a well known
lady of Baltimore, whoso maiden name
was Estelle Griffiths, and had two chil
dren the brightest, prettiest and hap-pie-t
boy and girl in tho City of Broth
erly Love. He owned his own home, a
beautiful structure, on Spruce between
Eighth a:id Ninth streets, and his busi
ness paid $15,000 a year.
"It was in May of 1809 that an end
came to the happiness of that household.
On the 12th of that month pretty little
Amy Duncan died. Both children hid
been loved dearly by their parents but the
little five-year-old girl was the idol of
the father. While she lived he was the
gayest domestic man in the world. When
she died, the ambition, love and good
ness of George Duncan also expired.
Prior to his young daughter's de nise he
had denounced drunkenness. Ho was a
regular crank on the subject. Imagine
the surprise of his friends when one
evening toward the latter part of May he
was drunk. The n the whole story tame
out. The death of his daughter was too
much to bear and to bury his sorrow and
forget his trouble he resorted to drink.
A fortnight passed, he was still drunk
and had not seen his wife, son or home
during that time. Friends innumera
ble sought and interrupted him la his
wild travels about the city, but though
-hey begged him to abandon his lately
acquired vice and prayed him to return
aome to his loving mate, who was fast
breaking her heart, he paid no beed to
Ihem. One Monday morning he learned
ais wife was scouring the city to find
him. He went to his principal manufac
tory, which was on Chestnut street, I
think, and in a drunken voice com
manded the head book-keeper to draw
and have cashed a check for $4,000.
This was done, and shoving the
money in an inside pocket, Dun
can walked out. That afternoon he
staggered aboard a Pennsylvania train
and came here to New York. What he
aid or how he spout his hours the fol
lowing ten days is unknown, but at the
end of that time he was arrested by an
o'licer of the Eighth precinct and locked
:. for disorderly conduct. Ho gave a
fctitious name, and said he was stopping
at the Stevcus house. The sum of $J,150
was found in the lining of his hat, and
when the police asked him what he was
doing with such a large amount about
his person, he promptly told them it was
iione of their business. He never di
vulged bis real name to thi judge, and
up-m being tine 1 (;'0, or thirty days, he
paid it and kit.
"What transpired subsequently is
only known from what he himself related
a year ago to the officers of the patrol.
It was a few weeks after he was dis
charged that tho American ship Mer
chant passed out of the narrows bound
to Sun Francisco. She was in tow, and
her commander, Capt. Donaldson, when
he saw Sandy Hook's whito sands draw
ing near, ordered the mate, a man named
Cody, to get on deck several sailors who
had been brought on board in a beastly
state of drunkenness. In those days, as
is now generally known, a system of bru
tality was in vogue; thus it was that
when the chief officer ran forward to the
forecastle where the several tardy men
were asleep, he determined to awaken
them in an old-fashioned manner.
Grasping a capstan bar, he entered the
sailors' headquarters and dealt two of
these men a German and a Scandina
vian a cruel blow on the limbs. Both
awoke in an instant.
" 'I called to you fellows to get on
deck before we left the wharf,' tho mate
ejaculated, 'but you need a little coax
ing, I reckon, and I thought I'd give it
to you on the end of a capstan-bar. Now,
it you don't get out to work like a streak
of lightning I'll knock the foreign eyes
out lit your dumb heads. Gitl Ileyl
listen to that fellow over there, will you,'
he continued, turning his attention to the
third and last individual, who was snor
ing in a lower bunk about ten feet away.
'Oil, I'll make you sober in short order,
me hearty. Bar medicine is always good
after a drunk,' and, as he spoke, he
struck his slumbering victim a blow in
the pit of tie stomach. With aery the
latter sat boldly upright; so rapid did
he move in fact that his head encount
ered with dreadful force the bottom
planking of the upper berth. There was
a vacant stare in his swollen eyes and
they seemed to mock his pale hectic like
face and bloodless lips. So weak did
the man look that for a moment the mate
was less brutal, and in a tone which was
indeed eomnassionato for one of his cali
bre, he said:
" 'Git out, me hearty. We'll soon be
setting sail and will want your hand.
Don't look at me like that, but git out
and come to work.'
"Tho man slowly moved from his
bunk, and half walked, and half stag
gered toward the centre of the forecastle.
He looked about him for a few minutes,
and then, as if to fathom some deep
mystery, he inquired in a voice so hoarse
as to again make tho mate pity him.
"Where am I? Tell me quickly.
where am I?
" 'Where, are you?" said the mate with
astonishment. 'Why, you're on the ship
Merchant, bound to Frisco. Hold on!
If you continue working your hands like
that I swear I'll have to put you in irons.
Be smart now and git '
"He hadn't time to complete his com
mand, for the wan-faced stranger had
glanced down at his own person and the
sight was so startling as to compel him
to scream. He had not noticed before
that he was attired in the rough costume
of a sailor, and when he did the horrible
truth nearly paralysed him. In a moment
he took in his position, though the mate
lor the life of hun could not understand
his strange actions. With one bound he
sprang for the door on the port
side to make certain whether or not
his fearful imagination was real. He
saw through his blood-stained eyes a
dozen men aloft setting a number of the
square sails, saw that already the fore
nnd aft canvos had been hoisted, saw
that a man stood at the wheel aft taking
orders from another on the poop deck,
and worst of all saw the white steam as
it escaped from the little pipe of the tug
which was fast taking the craft and him
self away to sea. Altogether he saw too
much and swooned to the deck. That
man was George Duncan, and he had
been robbed in this great city.
To hide the crime and obtain a
premium which was offered
by sea captains for seamen the plunder
ers had decked him in sailor garments,
carried him on bonrd the Merchant,
which was ready to sail and shipped him
as common Jack Tar. In other words,
he had been shanghaied. When he re
gained consciousness tho sun was going
down and he was in a bunk in the fore
castle. He got up and with a little dif
ficulty, for tho ship was doing some
grand sailing and rolling, walked on
deck. He saw the man to whom ho had
spoken that morning standing near the
mizzen mast. He reeled toward him.
He was perfectly sober now, and the
tears insisted on coming to his eyes, but,
notwithstanding their presence, he dra
matically sa'd:
"You are a man, and I know will lis
ten to what I have to say. You told me
this morning I shipped as a sailor on
bjard this vessel I did not. I am not
a sailor. I have never been to sea be
fore. I have been duped by some un
known persons. Now I am only an im
pediment to you, and will be obliged to
remain such for several months unless
you choose to put me ashore. I ask you
for God's sake, to make some ne ir-by
harbor, so that I may client, reparation to
my poor wife and baby boj before it is
too late."
"There was a little noble feeling mixed
up with the brutal character of the mate
Cody.and he really sympathized with the
unfortunate man.
" 'Git up,' he said in a remarkably low
voice, 'the men forward are looking this
way. Poor chap, I feel sorry for you.
You are not a sailor, you say, and I
know you're not. I guo-s the whole
story now. You were shanghaied while
drunk.' But. messmate, I cannot help
you. I would like to, 'pon honor, I
would; but you see the sails are crowded
with a favorable breeze and the old man
wouldn't change the course now for
kingdom come.'
'But I have plenty of money at
home,' pleaded Duncan, 'and I will give
the captain any sum lie demands if hu
will but put ine on laud.'
'You are a wealthy Uiua, then?' iu-
crcdulously Inquired tho mate, staring at
his rough dress.
" 'Yes,' responded Duncan, his eyes
assuming a surprising brightness.
"'And will pay the captain for hia
trouble if ho goes in shore?'
" 'Yes.'
" 'I'll speak to him,1 and ho went be
low to return in five minutes' time with
tho captain, a small, wicked-looking
personage. The skipper was the first to
speak.
" 'What's all this nonsense Mr. Cody's
been telling me?' he asked, looking hard
at Duncan. 'How do I know you're
telling me the truth? Any one of those
snoozers forward there might come aft
and tell me a like yarn. You say you
have money and will pay me if I land
you. Perhaps you have and maybe you
will; but when I go duck shooting I
want to see some ducks about. We are
now too far at sea to warrant my running
back. Beside, I never trust or believe
anybody, and while you may be all right
I'll stick to the opinion that you're all
wrong.' And he went below.
"It is no use relating how Duncan
swallowed this pill or how he passed the
following four months of his life. It was
approaching November when the mer
chant reached the Golden Gate, and he
was nearly dead from worriment and
overwork. He deserted the ship shortly
after his arrival, and telegraphed to an
acquaintance in Philadelphia for advices
as to his wife and child. A fortnight
passed before he received a reply, and this
came by mail. It nearly killed him when
he read it. His child was dead, it said;
his business was a thing of the past and
his wife was striving to become a free
woman, having instituted divorce pro
ceedings. He was too angered at what
he considered and styled her perfidy to
humble himself by sending an explana
tory letter; so with curses on her and
Captain Donaldson, who, he said, was
the cause of the whole affair, he resumed
his drinking habits, spending in a few
days all the money he had received for
his many tedious hours of labor on ship
board. When his funds were exhausted
he secured a berth oa a bark trading be
tween San Francisco and Honolulu, and
for two years he retained the same. After
that he shipped on a big new clipper
ship bound here and arrived without ac
cident. Since that time he has done lit
tle or nothing, except to drop down
lower and lower, until to-day he is a
mendicant. Yes. that man over there is
George Duncan." I never heard what be
came ol his wile or mends, but 1 guess
r .1 i i it l rr '
even now, u iney neara au nis sunenngs,
they would hesitate at reclaiming him."
A Dinner in the Harem.
Let me describe a dinner in the harem
when a guest is lircsent, writes a corre
spondent from Constantinople. Their
tables are always circular, and about
foot and a half in height. They sit like
dolls around them on cushions. The
old, inactive and fat, once down, have
to be pulled up. They serve but one
dish at a time, and that in a large circu
lar salver, brass, or sometimes gold.
They have no forks, knives or spoons.
but each dips two lingers of the right
Hand into the dish and takes out a bit.
the meat having previously been cut into
small pieces in the kitchen. If they wish
to particularly distinguish a visitor, they
select a dainty piece and place it in her
moutn. it would be an insult to betray
any feeling but delight at such a mark
of favor. A great dish for a feast, and
one which few Christian women have
ever tasted, is that of lamb roasted
whole. After the manner of a nest of
Chinese boxes, each smaller than the
other, the lamb is stuffed with a whole
turkey, the turkey with a chicken, the
chicken with a pigeon, tho pigeon with
a quail, the quail with a becafica, the
smallest bird known except the humming
bird. It resembles our reed bird in
taste, and makes only just one mouthful.
Tho lamb is roasted over a slow fire,
until it is cooked into shreds and melts
into one, as it wero.
The Egyptians have no systematized
way of eating, no set time for meals, but
keep up a continual munching of sweets,
of which they have a great variety un
known to us, aud all sickeningly sweet to
a European palate. They use honey for
suj!ir. In uu Egyptian kitchen there is
a total absence of what a civilized
cook would consider indispensable in the
way of cooking utensils and appliances.
There is no dresser upon which to arrange
the dishes; there is no sink, no running
water, nor anything like our cooking
stove or range, but upon one side of the
kitchen there is erected a structure of
masonry which represents a great square
shelf with deep drawers, th; openings of
which are on top. This queer object is
the Egyptian range. The openings are
charcoal furnaces, and, as they are dis
connected, a cook can have a dozen fires
or only one, as he desires. I have often
been astonished at the excellence and
delicacy of a dinner cooked upon one of
these rude ranges.
- v
Tools and Civilization.
"In tracing the course of inventlfjfl
and discovery," says Charles II. Ham in
his new work on ''.Manual training," "1
found that I was moving in the line of
the progress of civilization. I found that
the great gulf between the savage and
the civilized mau is spanned by the seven
hand tools the axe, the saw, the plane,
the hammer, the square, the chisel, and
the file and that the modern machine
shop is an aggregation of these tools
driven by steam. 1 hence came to re
gard tools as the great civilizing agency
of the world."
Orthographical.
If an H aud i uud au o aud a u, with au x at
the mill, sell "Hu,"
Aud au e aud a y und e sj II "i," pray what
is a kjIKt to dot
Then if also tin s and au 1 and a g and uu
h e-d spell "eide,';
There nothing urn h left fir u sie!!i r to d )
bin to uti'l lomuiil .Si aixryeii'.'.hi d.
HIS "SCALE OF PRICES."
WHAT A DAKOTA EDITOR CHARGES
FOB PUFFS.
A Graduated Scale, Beginning at
Watermelons and Leading Up
to Turkeys Other Notice.
Tho editor of the Estellino (Dakota)
Bell humorously observes :
As some little misunderstanding seems
to exist concerning the size of puff this
paper will give in return for favors real
or supposed we take this opportunity to
publish the following rates which take
effect from this date:
For one watermelon handed in at tho
office we will say. "Mr. Gardentruck,
our esteemed fellow townsman, presented
us last Wednesday afternoon with a large
luscious watermelon of the Plymouth
Hock variety, on which the printers
feasted. May he live long and prosper.'"
In case the melon proves to be green this
will be the form : "Farmer Gardentruck
laid a good sized melon on our table one
day this week. Thanks."
A small lot of new potatoes will call
out the following: "Undo Abner Stub
bleplow remembers ye editor just as we
go to press with a most luscious looking
mess of new potatoes. AVe and our family
expect to revel in tho fruit during the
coining week. He informs us that the
vines are doing great damage to the vines
of many of his neighbors. Uncle, you
struck the printers in the right spot; may
your shadow never grow less!"
When a box of cigars is left this is the
formula: "The sanctum of the Bell was
invaded last Tuesday by the genial pres
ence of Tom Livcrpills, the handsome
young proprietor of the Bed Front Pion
eer Drugstore, who placed on tap a full
box of choice llabanas. Here's to you,
Tom! Our many readers will remember
that he has just got in a full new line of
Paints, Oils, Axle Grease, Condition
Powders, Perfumery, Putty, and' other
Drugs and Toilet Articles."
Green corn will produce the following
editorial effect : "Ye scribe's family has
been enjoying another luxury for the
last four days, Mrs. Deacon Churchdebt
having presented our wife with a good
dozen of roasting cars. Such favors as
this are fully appreciated by yours truly
as well as by his wife and family. May
Mrs. C. meet her reward is our earnest
wish."
This for the big egg: "Squire Apple
jav laid the largest sample of hen fruit
on our desk one day this week that we
have ever seen, lfe assures us that it
measures eighteen by ten feet in circum
ference. Next!"
A bouquet will be acknowledged like
this: "Yesterday afternoon as ye pencil
pusher was busy with an unexpected
rush of job-work who should come in but
Miss Birdie Pistolpractice, the charming
daughter of our worthy fellow citizen,
Colonel Pistolpractice. She presented
us with a beautiful bouquet of wild
flowers which she had plucked with her
own fair hirhds. Among the varities wo
noticed fire-weed, dandelion, wild buck
wheat, red-top, tansy and sunflowers.
It shall remain many days to beautify
our sanctum. Our wife is also pleased
with it."
The giver of a spare rib may expect
this: "Our genial and justly popular
neighbor, Major Porcine, having fre
quently noticed the hungry look on the
printer's ftce took occasion early Monday
morning to leave a mammoth spare rib at
our humble abode, taken from one of his
famous drove of Southdown porkers. We
and our family .haVe accordingly been
feasting on fresh meat. By the way,- we
undestand that the major will accept the
nomination for the legislature if it is ten
dered him. He is the man for the place."
A turkey will inspire this: "While sit
ting in our sanctum sanctorum about 11
o'clock Thursday morning reclining our
head in our hands we were greatly sur
prised as well as pleased by having Colo
nel McTough walk in with a mysterious
air nnd a bundle under his arm. We had
just finished writing our leader found on
the first page entitled 'True Tariff lie
form as Compared with Tariff Jugglery'
and felt considerable fatigue, but it was
immediately dispelled when the hand
some colonel disclosed a laro, fat tur
key in the bundle which he assured us
was for our Thanksgiving dinner. To
say that we wore pleased but faintly
expresses the emotions which surged
through our breast. We immediately
emeu our wile, wtio was even - more
pleaded -than we. It is such things as
this that rtnake life amid the exacting
cares of tlrt newspaper office endurable
and causes us to keep on the editorial
harness without repining. .Colonel, may
Heaven reward you! It may not be out
of p'ace to inform our many readors that
the colonel's friends expect the coming
legist ure to elect him to the United
States Senate. He seems to be the unan
imous choico of our people. We predict
that he will get it on the first ballot."
Satisfactory Money.
The following story, says the London
Wf. Janift rlle, has not, we believe,
before nifired in print. A traveler just
at the close of the revolutionary war was
crossing the Fishkill mountains ut the
tini'j when it took about a hatful of Con
tinental money to buy a breakfast. He
had no money, but he had a copy of a
famous little book one of the earliest
printed books in America t ailed "The
New England Primer," which contained
the shorter catechism of the Scotch
church. It was a little book, but it
liietiires with rh vines ' such up.tlw e4
I
iiuum a tun e Niiiiieu 11:1 . ne.ci , ,,fcNi
i.i v. 1 1 ..: lilll ir.
out a number of these pi' lu,alll.0 to honor
ins oreaKiast, ami mum
old la Iv who had served
know much about readii"u,K,or'
them, looked at them I "
few pious words and i IH-W I'i Adj t.
jht ; 1 am so !H that
la: t ; o' Miiue money
iuU."
THE CHAPEL IN THE HEART.
Thrice blessed Is the man who keeps,
From other things apart,
A secret room, a holy place,
A chapel in the heart.
For there, when all the world without
Grows dark upon hU sight,
He may retire and find within
His chapel full of light
An t there, when jangling sounds of earth
Fall, discords, on his ear,
He ean repair, and undisturbed.
he eternal music bear.
And there he hastens when the world
Loud praises, to confess,
With sad aud true humility.
F His own unworthiness.
Thither, when with a golden snare
Temptation hems his way,
He quickly turns, with trembling lips
And bated breath, to pray.
Thrice blessed is the man who keeps,
From other things apart,
This sacred room, this holy place,
This chapel in his heart.
S'ew York Graphio.
IIUMOK OF THE DAY.
"You break me all up," said the pota
toes to the masher.
The nick of time Tho piece broken
out of the ancient crockery. Eamb'.er.
"Did you hear the lecture last night?"
asked Williams of his neighbor Bcasley.
"No," relied Bcasley, "my wife wasn't
at homo." T id-Bits.
Many a man doesn't realize that heha
had a ewell time at an evening party until
he tries to put his hat on the next morn
ing. New York Onijiik.
"One of George Washington's body
servants" can now take a rest. He is
succeeded by tho "last passenger to leave
the Oregon.'' Statesman.
A man named Knapp was arrestpd in
church in Baltimore the other day. There
is something familiar about this taking
a Knapp iu church. BiwJiamton lie
public. Tho Maternal Instinct. "Look 'ere
now, Sal!" yelled a Travis county, Texas,
woman to the oldest girl, "don't bend
over that well so fur. You'll fall in there
some of these days and then we'll have to
get our drinkin' water from the creek."
Texas Sifting.
Bob slipjied in t see Miss Mary,
Just back from the seminary,
Just missed her pa, old and contrary,
As the clock strurk 8 p. m.
Her pa missed Bob and loudly swore
As he barked his leg on tho big front door
That mi bansod inhis face, with an au rovoir
As the clock strurk 4 a m.
(r'ennttiifoum Independent.
Coming into the station: Brakonian
"Paw-tucket! Paw-tucket H" Train boy
(at other end of car) "Car-amcls ! Car
amels!!" Troublous old gentleman (un
familiar with route) "Dear me, dear me,
did you understand what station they
ailed!" Providence Journal.
A woman cannot get up in public and
say ten words before a dozen people, but
she can get up before one man if he
happens to be her husband aud she can
say more in ten minutes than a book
worm could find in a college library in
two years of constant search. Chicago
Ledger.
A lawyer's brief is very long,
And Mr. White is black,
A man is dry when he is green,
Aud when he's tight he's slack.
A (ire is hot when it is coaled.
A lamp is heavy though it's light
A shoe is bought when it is soled.
A man can see when out of sight
.Merc'flant-XraveeT.
The National Capitol.
Tho southern corner-stone of the cap
itol of tho United States of America was
laid September 18, 17UU, and the north
wing finished in 1800. Congress im
mediately occupied it. By 1814 the Cap
itol had expanded into an imposing ed
ifice. Then the British troops fired
both the north and south wings of the
structure, but the walls were saved,
thanks to a heavy rain. For years after,
Congress met elsewhere than in the cap
itol, which meanwhile was being pre
pared for renewed occupancy. By 1867
the capitol had been enlarged externally,
and made to appear precisely as it does
to-day. Thirteen million dollars had
been expended on it. Its magnificence
place it among the greatest structures
of cither ancient or modern times. It
I covers more than three and a half acres.
and is surrounded by grounds having an
area of forty-six acres. Standing on the
brow of a hill, it can be seen for many
miles, and the view from its dome is in
effably grand.
Tho main building is 352 feet and
five inches long, and lit! feet and six
inches deep. Aportic) on the eastern
1 - i ... . r . i .!!. 1 .1. .
lacane measures iou leei iue,, mm me
projection on the western side measures
eighty-three Ret, forming a portico At
ten columns.
Congress sits in the wings, the Senate
in the north wing, and the House 4 Kpp.
resentatives iu the south wing. Each
of these wings has a portico of twenty
two columns ou its casteji facade, and
one of ten columns at ityend and western
facade. l'h ilade'jduaCuU.
TlieTrtili About It.
"Spring'," sairj; the poet, "budding Spring."
Alas! the boughs were bare;
He wus himself the one green thing,
For ice lay everywhere.
"Hail, Spriji, with breezes soft and sweet"
Tiie Sl"i"uii- returned hiu hail:
- ..ri. cyfie a shower of suow aud sleet
pou lutry v;ule.
Um urn i
ilea 0.U hu. d.u h '
h and tree."
uu.0 iio commenced fWu 'ie
ilJUs. B C. BOi
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vrfcoge, utLdt(,siug.
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Century,