3
.
THE FOREST REPUBLICAN
It published every Wednc.day, bj
J. E. WENK.
Oftioain Bmearbaugh & Co.'a Building
BLlt STREET, TIONESTA, Pa.
Terms,
I.BO per Year.
No anbaerlptlnn received for a shorter period
than thn nmntlia
Oanvipondenot solicited from all ftwrU of the
outry. Ho notice will be taka
of Aoonmoua
Anlhonjr Comstock, of tho New York
society for tho prevention of Tiro, says it
is difficult to traco persons conducting
fraudulent scheme becauso of tlicir
numerous aliases. One man whom ho
ld arrested hud 145 different nnmesnnd
.idlrcssos, another 130, and a third had
eighty.
Mr.'Theron E. Piatt, of Fairfield
county, Conn., )m raised 200 varitics of
liotatocs on his firm during the past
year. The study of fungoid pests of tho
potato has also occupied his attention,
nnd his discoveries respecting certain
diseases of this plant are likely to proTe
serviceable.
Tho almost incredible story is
told of a Western farmer that, some
years sgo, hearing burglars breaking into
his house, and l.elng out of buckshot,
lio hurriedly loaded his gun with a box
of pills, which were compounded, how
ever, of a soft material, nnd merely
smeared the burglars somewhat, as
warmed cobbler's wax might havo done,
when tho weapon was discharged; and
that the other day, again hearing burglars
nnd being out of buckshot, and bearing
Lis former failure in mind, ho loaded up
with pills which were sugar-coated, and
shot one burglar dead and seriously
wounded another.
An Albany doctor asserts that electric
ity has been ono of tho most beneficent
modern health restorers. It is now used
successfully for a great variety of mala
dies. Tumors are cured by it, paralysis
relieved, neuralgia dissipated, sleepless
ness overcome, colds broken up, rheuma
tism bene ite.l, constipation helped,
some skin diseases healed, and asthma,
St. Vitus' dance, and a great number of
other affections favorably influenced by
its proper use. Of course many cases
nro not in the least helped by electricity,
and it should always be administered by
aqy expert as a guarantee that more
harm than good may not result.
It is announced that Messrs. Appert.of
Clichy, France, havo discovered a process
that will mako glasi blowing by tho
mouth unnecessary. Many attempts havo
been made to get rid of this painful pro
cess in tho operations of glass making,
to this day in every bottle house, may be
fcn the pale-faced men with their
cheeks hanging limp in folds, tho result
of years of glass blowing by the mouth.
Cases have been known in which men's
checks have b?en worn so thin that they
have actually cracked, and it is a com
mon sight in a bottlo house to sea blow
ers at work with the r thin cheeks puffed
out like the fingers of a glove.
It appears that one of tho reasons for
the low prico of quinine lies in the fact
that the cinchona trees are no longer de-
Btroyed in tho harvesting. The old plan
was to cut them down and strip off the
bark when they were ten years old. Then
the idea was adopted of, tearing off long
trips and filling the bare places with
moss. The present method is to scrape
oil tho outer layer of the bark, the por
tion richest in quinine, and this does not
interfere with the growth of tho tree.
Tho bark is scraped 1 alf around at one
operation, the other half being scraped
six months afterward. The process may
be repeated year after year.
The expedition sent out by tho Domin
ion government to ascertain whether tho
"Hudson Bay route" to Europe is naviga
ble was highly successful. It discovered
that it was not navigable. The Alert
fought the ice nearly every inch of the
way; had to put back for repairs in July;
was stuck in the ico during August;
broke a blade of her screw, and, after be
ing for several days at the mercy of the
ice pack, returned, baffled. If an Arctic
ice vessel c an't traverse tho Hudson bay
route in midsummer, the chance of any
ordinary steamship getting through in
January, or even in July, can be easily
calculated. .
Miniature painting is an art which, if
not lost, has at least fallen into decline.
' Certainly the costly ivory miniatures of
our fair grandmothers could not be re
produced to-duy by tho same process,
with anything like Katisfactory results.
Something which is more than a substi
tute, however, is found in the curious
"'and beautiful rock-crystal portraits
which are now to be seen at l"ding jew
elry stores of New York city. They are
produced by a process known only to the
inventor, Monsieur E. Irlando. The por
trait is first vitrified upon tho crystal,
and then paiutcd in oil colors, either in
monochrome or in the style of the ivory
miniature. It has all the artistic effect
of the latter, while far surpassing it in
liidclity of likeness. These miniatures
tun te produced in flawless perfection
down to the minutest size, and will prob
ably come into high favor for lockets,
brooches, sleeve buttons, etc.
VOL. III. NO. 3.
WHO CAN HE BE?
You may stake your last copper
A man who Is proper
Would not tell a "whopper"
Or get In a fight;
And he Isn't the fellow
To play himself yellow
On the vlolineello
Way into the night
And he rests from his labors
Amid friends and neighbors,
And carries no sabres
Or pistols or knife.
He wants no blood diet,
He don't rave nor riot,
But stays at home quiet,
Alone with his wife.
He isn't a bragger,
He don't swell nor swagger
Nor carry a dagger
Concealed in his breast.
But he's valiant as Hector,
As staid as a rector,
And wears a protector
Over his chest
He don't bruise nor boot us
Nor, like Booth or Brutus,
Get angry and shoot us
And make no amends.
He don't eat late suppers,
Write verses like Tupper's,
Bteal cash of his papa's
Or prey on his friends.
He don't growl at his mutton
Nor rave when he's got on
But one single button
He thinks one will do'.
In church he ne'er do es
Nor postures nor poses,
But mcukur then Moses,
Ho sits in his pew.
He never drinks toddy
And never wears shoddy,
But loves everybody
Both ugly and sweet;
He's an honest believer,
He's no base doceivor,
And he keeps his best beaver
Untarnished and neat
He's no politician,
He dont have a "mission,"
He wants no position
Nor haiikerc for fumo.
Ho don't blow or bluster
Nor swell out his duster
While he boasts of the lustre
Of his family name.
He's no sour croaker,
No cigarette smoker,
No tiresome joker
With jests that are tame.
He's a man of ability,
Of mental virility,
But in modest humility
I can't tell his name.
Lynn (Mass.) Union.
A CHECKERED gAREER.
San Quentin prison, twenty miles from
San Francisco, contains a vast number of
outlaws and desperate men generally,
but conspicuous rmong these imprisoned
road agents i.v"Billy'' Miner, who has
not only figured prominently as a high
wayman in California, but is knowrfin
the same capacity in Colorado and the
Rocky .mountain districts, lie has also
posed as a lioti of society in a quiet town
in tho peaceful State of Michigan. Miner
is now thirty-seven years of age, and not
withstanding his many years of
confinement is yet a handsome
and graceful fellow, fluent of tongue
and captivating in Btyle. Previous to
1880 Miner served four years in San
Quentin for stage robbery, and immedi
ately upon his release, quietly disap-
E eared from the State. Early in Novem
er, 18S0, he arrived in Denver, Col.,
where he met Billy Lcroy, one of the
most noted and daring highwaymen that
ever stopped u stage or stole a horse in
the Rocky mountains. Miner and Leroy
at once formed a partnership, Miner
adopting tho name of William A Mor
gan; ho was better known among the
thieving fraternity as "California Billy."
The finances of the pair were low, and
they immediately set out upon a prospect
ing tour to Ihe southwestern part of
Colorado. About the middle of the
month of December they robbed
the Del Norte stage, realizing from
this hazardous undertaking the sum
of $3,000 in gold coin. They were
closely pursued by Lew Armstrong, sher
iff of Rio Grande county. Lcroy was
subsequently captured and hanged by a
vigilance committee. Miner, with more
than usual pood luck, escaped with all
the booty, and made his way to Chicago.
He remained in that city only long
enough to secure a most fashionable out
fit, and having filled two Saratoga trunks
with gorgeous finery, he speedily left this
prominent point for the quiet seclusion of
Michigan. He settled upon the retired
town of Onondaga in which to make his
debut in society. The advent of a fash
ionably attired, dashing, and handsome
young man with apparently unlimited
resources created quite a stir in Onon
daga society, and Miner soon gained an
entree to tho best families in the
town. He claimed to be a
wealthy gentleman from California that
was attending to some private business
winding up an estate of which ho was
the sole surviving heir. The prodigality
with which he spent his money pave
color to his story and ut once established
him as a great catch. He was particu
larly attentive to the ladies, aud told
them all manner of fabulous stories about
his great wealth in California treat
blocks of houses in Sacramento and San
Francisco, and rich gold mines without
number. One girl, more dazzled than
the rest, become cnguged to marry him.
But Miner's reckless extravagance soon
depleted his finances to such an extent
that he made up his mind to leave the
4juiet retirement of Onondaga society and
I 1
TIONESTA, PA., WEDNESDAY. MAY 12,
again seek the wilds of the West for
further suppics.
During the latter part of February,
1881, Miner told his friends that urgent
business called him at once to Califor
nia. His aged mother was in feeble
health, and it was absolutely essential
that he should fake her upon an ocean
voyage, and allow the gentle breezes of
the Pacific to fan back to her faded
checks the bloom and glow of health. On
the eve of his departure the prominent
citizens of the town gave him a banquet,
nt which tho mavor presided, and Billv
, became the hero of the hour. He bade
! his tearful betrothed an affecting good-
l... . : d. ... - . i i j
uj, piounsuig to return as soon as ne nau
performed a most commendable act of
filial duty. He again turned up in Den
ver, where he sold all his finery, and with
the money purchased a Winchester rifle,
two pistols, and a knife. He then
joined forces with Stanton T.
lones, formerly of Chillicothe, Ohio.
The pair immediately made their
way to Del Norto, nnd again tho Del
Norte stage was robbed, but this time tho
plunder was but a small sum. They
made tlicir escape to tho Rocky moun
tains closely followed by Armstrong and
a posse. After a long search they were
finally captured, but while the officers
were on their way to Del Norte with thoir
prisoners, they stopped to camp for the
night. The officers were tired, and fell
asleep, leaving Jones and Miner to be
watched by a teamster. At 1 o'clock in
the morning the two men broke away,
and with a pistol that had b n over
looked in the search Miner lirc.l four
shots at the officers, breaking the arms
of one and seriously wounding t lie other.
They then dashed away in the darkness.
This was the last heard of them in Col
orado. On the morniug of the 7th of Novem
ber, 1881. the stage from Sonora to Mil
tou, in Tuolumne county, Cal., was
robbed by four masked men of $3,700.
The job was neatly done in ten
minutes, and not a mark or sign was left
to denote who had committed the act.
Detective Aull, then in the employ of
Wells, Fargo & Co.'s express, but now
captain of the yard nt San Quentin
prison, took charge of the case, and ar
rived on the scene the day following
the robbery. He at once determined
that the work had been supervised by
Miner, although at lh.it time it was not
known that ho was on tho Pacific coast.
Aull, in company with the sheriffs from
the surrounding counties scoured the
country. A trip made through Stanis
laus disclosed the fact that a notorious
horse thief named Jim Connor had
been seen in that vicinity in com
pany with a dashing voung man named
Will iam Anderson. Anderson was laid
up for some time at Chinese Camp with
chills and fever, nnd while there made
many friends. After his recoverv An
derson attended a country ball at Angels'
Camp, a place mado famous from tho
poem of "The Spelling School nt An
gels," by Bret Ilarte. At this ball An
derson was lionized by tho ladies, and
during the evening promised to send
some music from San Francisco to a
young girl who had attracted his passing
fancy. This ball occurred the evening
before the robbery, and two weeks later
tho music was sent, which furnished
the first clue to the robbers. They were
traced to ban J? raneiseo, where thev had
arrived after five nights of long rides on
horseback. While in the city Miner,
or Anderson, purchased an $85
suit of clothes, a $50 overcoat,
and a gold watch and chain. Thus gor
geously equipped he started back ill com
pany with Crum to pursue tho courtship
begun on the night of the ball. When
about half way back they learned for the
first time that Captain Aull was on their
track. They immediately changed their
course and went to the ranch of Bill
Miller, near Woodlawn, a well-known
resort for road agents.
In tho mean time Captain Aull had
learned that Bill Miller was one
of tho robbers of the Sonora
stage, and anticipating that they
would congregate on the ranch, he
turned his attention to that section.
Early one morning Aull, with two
other officers, drove out in the direction
of tho Miller rendezvous to take observa
tions. As they approached the house
they saw two men carrying guns running
away in the direction of a small creek.
The officers whipped up their horses
and drove down a lane to a gate
that entered tho field the two
fleeing footmen were in. As
they opened the gate to pass through an
other man was discovered behind a tree
with a shotgun pointed nt tho officers
and menacing any further advance. After
a parley lasting several minutes the man
behind the tree concluded that the odds
were against him, and surrendered. The
other two men escaped. The ono captured
proved to bo the notorious Jim Cium.He
had on his p "rson at the time $G00 in
money, two lino pistols, and a breech
loading shotgun, and in the stable was
found his favorite riding horse Flora,
that was already celebrated for endur
ance and speed.
There was no doubt in the minds of
the officers thnt the two men that fled
were Billy Miner and Bill Miller, and
after sending their first captive to
Sacramento they turned their attention
to the two fugitives. About 1 o'clock the
same afternoon Captain Aull and Billy Ar
lington of Sacramento left Woodland in
a buggy in the direction of Sacramento.
They had followed the Sacramento river
abiut two miles when they caught sight
of two men getting oil the high leveo
down next the river. The movements
of the men were somewhat suspicious.
When they suddenly disappeared down
the river bank Captain Aull got out of
his buggy and went up on the levee to
see what hud become of them. He was
armed with a short shotgun. Arlington
was left in charge of the buggy with
but a single pistol. When Aull reached
the
top
of the grado he did not
one ut first but on looking
bee
any
around he discovered Billy Miner
and Bill Miller within thirty feet of him,
each with a double-barrelled shotgun at
full cock, covering him completely. An
attempt to fight would have been instant
death. Aull, apparently not noticing
their warlike attitude, addressed them
pleasantly, and succeeded in throwing
them off their guard. Aull gravely told
tho robbers that ho had been out duck
hunting, nnd had mistaken them for
some of his party, from whom he had
become separated. Finding that he had
succeeded in deceiving them, Aull bnde
them good evening, and wentdirectto the
buggy. On-! look behind him would
havo been fatal, as the robbers followed
him, keeping parallel with him. When
he reached tho buggy tho two men turned
and fled. Aull drove rapidly to a pair
of bars which brought him within 125
yards of the fugitives. He then com
menced firing at them. After the few
first shots Miller threw up both hands
and surrendered. Miner kept on his
course down the river. Aull turned Mil
ler over to Arlington and set out aftet
Miner. After following him for half a
mile Miner gave himself up. The pair
were immediately taken to Sacramento,
and that night Crum, Miller and Miner
slept under one roof.
Tho confession of Jim Crum made the
case an easy one. The culprits were
taken to Sonora by Captain Aull and two
other officers. When arraigned they
plend guilty. Miller and Miner each re
ceived twenty-live years in San Quentin,
while Crum, on account of his confession,
escaped with twelve years.
The fourth robber was known to be
Stanton Jones, Miner's Colorado com
panion, who had accompanied him to
the Pacific coast through Arizona, where
their passage was marked with many
robberies. Jones is still at large. Neit
York Sun. ,
Successful Songs.
An interesting fact about successful
songs may be noted, and that is, only
sentimental songs make any money.
Humorous songs become very popular.
They are applauded in the theatre, when
a favorite singer sings them, and are
laughed at unrestrainedly, but very few
in the audience ever think of buying
copies of them. This is peculiarly true
of that description of humorous ditty
known as the topical song. It may be
explained that this is a song in which the
material of the different verses is ar
ranged to give point to a significant
fhase which invariably forms the last
ino of tho verse. The performance
fractically amounts to giggling with
anguage, the effect coming from the
humorous and unexpected illustration
which can be adduced of the idea em
bodied in the adopted phrase.
Given on the stage by an export singer
who enforces the poiuts of tho verses by
appropriate action and facial expression,
these songs are very effective. Sung in
the parlor by an ordinary vocalist and
without the effect which comes from the
assembly of a largo number of people,
these songs almost invariably fall flat. In
consequence, they are very seldom sung
there, and tho music publishers who give
them to the world find tho world un
grateful, much to the publisher's pecuni
ary grief. On the other hand, a senti
mental song may be sung in the home
circle by an inexperienced singer with
very fair effect. Somehow or other, tho
underlying sentiment survives tho most
outrageous treatment. It has better stay
ing qualities than humor has. The melo
dies are simple, the thoughts expressed
find a welcome among all classes of peo
ple and the sheet music finds its way to
thousands of piano racks through the
laud, and so the publisher becomes hap
py and affluent. Neie York Mail and Ex
press. Heat Modified by Vegetation.
Dr. Stephen Smith in the course of a
paper on the effects of tho high heat of
summer, read before tho New York
academy of medicine recently, said:
Vegetation, now, is the natural mean s
of modifying the temperature of tho air.
It takes from it carbonic acid gas and
malaria; it gives back oxygen and cool
ing moisture. An acre of gras gives
6,400 quarts of water to the air in twenty-four
hours. But trees exceed all other
forms of vegetation in modifying the air.
The Washington elm iu Cambridge pro
duced a crop of 7,000,000 leaves, equal
to five acres of vegetation. Trees have
a fixed temperature summer and winter
of from fifty-four to fifty-six degrees.
The exposed pavement in Fifth avenue
has been found on a summer day heated
to 130 degrees, but near by in tho shade
of a tree its temperature was only seven
ty degrees.
The great remedy, then, for the rav
ages of excessive heat is the planting of
trees. New York is a shadeless city, und
its mean summer temperature is increas
ing every year as the area of stone and
brick extends. Our streets, avenues and
public places should all be planted with
trees. All tho trees now pi inted and
those hereafter to be planted should be
put in charge of the department of parks
or tho department of public works, and
tho city should empower tho department
in charge to plant and cultivate shado
trees, one at least to every lot of twenty
five feet in all the streets and avenues
below Central Purk.
Shifting Responsibility.
A charitable lady living on the Back
Bay gives baskets of food several times
a week to poor families. To ono of her
pensioners who hud a sick wife the lady
taid ono morning: "There ure some or
anges in the basket, John, for your wife;
how is she to day ?" "Not much better,
ma'am, thank ye," adding mournfully,
"I'm coin' to do all I can for Rosy, ami
then I s'poso t lie l.ord'll do just us lie's
a mind to." Iluatuu IStacon.
A Fail-burn, ((!a.j lady, aged
never tabled meat.
70, has
(1 ft
$1.50 PER ANNUM.
SELECT SITTINGS.
Tho VctJnsci'cnce fund" at Washington,
begun in 1827, now amounts to $320,000,
and is increasing every year.
A Russian convict is said to havo sur
vived a punishment of 2,000 lashes. As
high a number as 4,000 lashes is said to
have been imposed in some cases, but no
convict ever survived the infliction of the
punishment.
A Kennebunk, Maine, man recently
captured 800 bees while they were swarm
ing in tho woods. He daubed himself
with honey, the bees lighted thereupon,
and in this way he transported them
home without receiving a sting.
Though tho principle on which an arch
was constructed was not entirely un
known to the Greeks, yet their universal
u-e of the columnar style of achitecture,
nnd general deficiency of roads, aque
ducts and bridges, rendered its use un
necessary to them, but tho Romans em
ployed it extensively in all their great
works.
The manufacture of alcohol from wood
has increased rapidly within a few years,
and it is said to be used largely for pat
ent bitters, ginger extracts and othci
alcoholic compounds whose strong flavor
makes it unnecessary to use a bettei
quality of spirits. Wood alcohol is a
dangerous product, nnd sometimes gives
rise to serious disturbances of the brain
and nervous system.
Afghanistan shepherds keep dogs that
make their pasture-grounds unapproach
able to strangers. They are perfeet
beasts of prey, ready to tear a man for
the slightest provocation, but charging
wolves and leopards with the same reck
less courage. Game is so plentiful in
the uplands that the rangers have no
difficulty in providing food for a dozen
of such trained were wolves.
Christian Glauser, of Reading, Penn.,
is one of the few dealers, if not the only
dealer, in dogs' meat in this country. He
keeps it on hand to sell to persons who
think it may be good for their health,
and also tries out the fat and sells it a? a
cure for colds, rheumatism, and troubles
of the chest. He says that the meat of a
fat dog has a rich, delicate flavor that
everybody relishej who tastes it, and there
is no finer-looking meat than dressed dog.
A German authority state j that a curi
ous historical document concerning a
Panama canal exists in tho archives ot
Venezuela, bearing the date of 17S0.
A canal project, this document records,
was broached in the reign of Philip II.,
and Flemish engineers surveyed the ter
ritory and declared the obstacles were
not insurmountable. "Native govern
ors," continues the document, "thereup
on pointed out tho king tho enormous
commercial disadvantages likely to arise
to Spain from such undertaking, and in
consequence whereof the king itsied a
rescript which threatened with death any
person nliu ling by word or writing to
the project."
General Stoneman nnd (he Sergeant.
In the winter of 1804, while making
the raid on King's salt work, under
command of General Stoneman, I became
a target for the eyes and tongue of the
great aud good man, and the circum
stances are ever fresh in my memory,
Being short of government rations,
with strict orders not to forage, but hav
ing good health and a craving appetite, I
resolved to run some chances to satisfy
tho latter.
The command was moving slowly up a
little valley, with here and there a house
in view. Handing the reins of my horse
to a comrade I started oil toward a large
house situntrd not far from the road, and
soon found myself in the yard. Going to
the rear of the house I immediately lo
cated the smokehouse, and I found to
my surprise and joy it was reasonably well
filled with meat. . Snatching a large ham
from tho wull, where it hung, I began
making my retreat, going direct to the
road, never thinking but I would find my
horse and comrade close at hand.
But slowly as they were moving they
had passed on some distance, and as I
looked up I met the cold, stern gaze of
General Stoneman. Tho situation was
evident. Dropping the ham, I started on
a run for my regiment.
It was then I realized he belonged to
no church, for the air was blue as he or
dered me to come back. To resist was
folly. 1 slopped and turnid to see the
General's horse within four feet of the
ham. "Pick up that ham," and as I
started to obey tho order I thought of all
the punishments soldiers are sub jected to
from the guard-house to the death sen
tence. Getting the ham on my arm, I
lo.iked him in tho face and waited for
further orders.
Raising in his stirrups, he fairly yelled :
"Steal and throw it away I Get "to youi
command !"
I did "get." and his blessing helped
me to "get."
Long may the good general live, for a
better hum was never eaten. Strycitnt J.
T. Ferity n.
No Liveries for Him.
"Gath," the New York correspondent,
tells a story of a major-general of the
British army, who came to the American
metropolis on a visit from India, and a
prominent man who was not in politics,
to whom he brought a letter, put him iu
his fine carriage and took him everywhere.
The Englishman said one day: "I see
that some of these carriages have drivers
in livery suits, while yours has not."
"No, sir," mid the man; "I never put
my driver in livery, because I have a lit t lo
superstition about it. 1 am a speculator,
and have my ups and downs, und it oc
curred to me that some day or other I
might die poor, und that my son might
bin e to drive one of these carriages, a:id
1 think I would not li!e to see him iu
that kind of livery uniform."
An e-.client quality of paper lias been
made from the pulp of Lauuuitg. I
RATES OF ADVEWTISWO.
One Square, on Inch, on Inter on. ..A 1
Un Square, on Inch, on month 0
One Square, one Inch, three mentha. o
One Square, one Inch, on year , , 10 04
Two Square., one year ja oo
Quarter Colnma, one year. (to
Half Column, one year .'J.'.'. H 1M
One Column, one year ... m M
Wal adrertl.ement. ten enta yet line each In
rtion.
Marriage aid death notice, gratia.
All bill, for yearly adrertiaemaata aialxjaxl m
tat j. Temporary adrmbemette aaaatWaaUki
advanoe .
Job weak oaah on dellrery.
ENCHANTMENT.
Low in the valley and high on the hllL
When spring reawakens the earth.
All day does the bttle bird carol and trfll;
And the children laugh out in their mirth.
But ever it seems to the chiUlren below
That the sweetest songs come from on high.
Away to the hill top they merrily go;
Then, resting, they listen and sigh.
For the song in the volley seems sweetest and
best,
I"l rno upon the breeze, far and faint,
An i when we grow older the truth is con
fessed '
All echo the little one's plaint!
The bird that sings near us and always wo
slight
For the bird that slugs faintly afarl
Oh, bird of the heavens, pray never alight,
The charm of your singing to mar.
Will S. Faris, in the Current.
nUMOR OF THE DAY.
The home-stretch An after-dinner
nap.
After all, a good big; healthy cyclone
is the thing to bring down the house.
Fuck.
There is a man in Oregon who is nau
seated at the sight of an egg. He would
mako a poor lecturer. Maverick.
If you desire to take aa extended
pleasure trip, get a bicycle and go to
Wheeling. Detroit Free Press.
When a person is in evcrbody's mouth
he naturally has a high appreciation of
tho popular taste. Boston Transcript.
Jones (who is not friendly to Johnson)
Y'es 1 He resembles his father, who i
about us small a man as I have ever met.
liotbury Adcocate.
Young wife "Won't you try some of my
home-made bread, dear?" He "I have
tried, and I'll try again, but it's a very
trying situation to be placed in." Life.
"Look here, judge," said the burglar;
"I ain't so bad as you think I am. Only
give mo time and I'll reform." And the
judge gave him fifteen years. Somer
tUle Journal.
A little boy whose sprained wrist had
been relieved by bathing in whisky sur
prised his mo:h:.'r by asking: "Did papa
ver sprain his throat when he was a
boy?" Chicago Telegram.
"Do you know, my pretty dear," he
began. "Don't call me your pretty dear,"
she retorted, "I'm entirely too lively to
be a pretty dear, for they belong to the
stag-nation, you know." Pittsburg
Chronicle.
"Dear sir," he said, "I'd like to ask,
Unless the question's rude,
What means those strange and mystic words,
'Inoeuous lemotudel"'
"Of course the question is not rude,"
The other man replies;
"They mean, you see, the business man,
Who does not advertise."
Washington Critic-
"Another lock-out," angrily muttered
Phasecius, upon returning home at a late
hour from a meeting of tho Knights of
Labor, and being refused admittance by
Lavina. Pending the action of a board
of arbitration he has an apartment at a
neighboring hotel. Detroit Free Press.
"If a man can keep his teeth until after
middle age," says the London Lancet,
"he may generally count on keeping them
to tho end of his life." There is no
reason why he shouldn't keep them pro
vided he has paid for them and isn't
careless enough to swallow them in his
after-dinner sleep. Grajihic.
"Pigs' Feet Broiled a la Barnum."
Tho late Harrison Pha'bus was an epi
cure above everything else. The creator
of a new dish was to him a greater man
than he who won many battles. 1 Among
tho guests nt his hotel, at Old Point
Comfort, a few years ego, was the
veteran showman, P. T. Larnum. He,
too, loves tho good things of this life.
One afternoon the two were sitting to
gether on the hotel veranda, l'arnum
was spinning one of the yarns for
which he is famous. He broke off sud
denly in tho middle of his story with the
remark:
"Say, Pho?bus, why don't you ever serve
pig's ftet for breakfast?"
"Becuuse they're not fit to eat," laconi
cally replied Mr. Pha'bus.
"They're not, eh I I'll cure you of
that b ' lief. Got a cook you can trust?"
"several of them," responded the as
tonished Pha'bus.
"Send tho best one up to me," said
Barnum.
The cook came. "Now," said Mr.
Barnum to the astonished chef, "get
some pigs' feet fat ones; wash them
clean very clean; then wrap each one
separately in a piece of clean muslin that
hasn't got any starch in it. Then boil
'cm. Boil 'em hard and boil 'em long ;
not less than seven hours. Do you un
derstand? seven hours. Then take them
out aud put them in a cool place. When
they're cool unwrap 'cm and split 'em.
Understand? Split 'em right in the cen
ter. Next day broil 'cm and serve 'em
hot tho hotter the better, but for
heaven's sake don't fry 'em."
The cook followed instructions, nnd
the next day Mr. Phuibus took breakfast
with Mr. and Mrs. Barnum and the
friend who tells tho story. Mr. Phicbus
nteof them, und ate heartily. They just
touched his tasto and "supplied along
felt want." When the pigs' feet had
disappeared, Mr. Phiebus' comment was,
"Say, Barnum, that's food fit for a
king."
And that is how it came alwut that
tho visitor to thu Queen's hotel in Lon
don, ut Leland's hotel in Chicago, at the
West End hotel ul Long Brunch, and at
various first -class hotels in this city, finds
cm the breukdist iill of lure t before
him, "llgs' feet broiled u la Barnum."
Mr. i'hu lius had iutrodu 'cd the dish to
his brother caterers in various parts of
the world. Hartford Post.