!;c crrrt llfpliliraa
J. E. WENTC.
Omce In StuearbangU Co.'s Enliding,
ELM STREET, . TIONE3TA, PA.
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I
...... y ViV'
STAND LIKE THE ANVIU
"Bland like tho anvil," whoa tlio sSrilcea
Of Blalwnrt men fall florce find fast ;
Storms but more deeply root tlia on':,
VTumo brawny arms embrace tl-.e blnsfc.
'-Stand like tlie anvil," when fie sparks
Fly fur and wilo, a fiery shower i
Virtue and truth mint still In mnrki
Vt'hcro ninlice rnvos iu want of powor.
' S.nnd like the nnril," when the btr
lics r.ni ami glowm.? o;i ita broaat
Duly plmll be lifo's loading stir,
And coiHc.ioun innocence its reit.
"Stand like the anvil ;" noie and hcrnt
Are born of earth and die with time J
The soul, like God, its source and sout,
Is siJdom still, serene, sublime.
FAITH REWARDED.
CHAPTER I.
"You will bo back 0.3 soon as you
ran, Edith? You know how I dislike
being left alone." Mrs. . Bertram
epoko fretfully, nnd looked as If she
rather resented lior daughter's going
out sit all. "Anil you will think over
what 1 have said to you about Dr.
Ashby? You know, my dear, some
me must make a sacrifice; I'm sure
I'm willing to do anything, but what
53 there a helpless invalid can do? If
you would only look at tho matter
from a reasonablo point of view you
would not hesitate. Just think of
Blanche and Eva, what is to become of
those poor, darling children?"
Edith sighed deeply; she had been
thinking of the children all tho morn
ing while teaching them their lessons
and correcting their exercises, trying
to coax Bee to practice, nnd Eva to
cet through her French verbs, think
ing what a comfort it wouid bo if
they could both bo sent off to a good
school, where they would be taught
obedience; for though she had all tho
trouble, bhe had not tho slightest con
trol over them.
It only seemed like playing at les
sons to have Edith for a governess,
while to her it was weary, wering
work, added to all her other anxieties
and worries. For everything seemed
to fall on Edith's shoulders. Mrs.
Bertram was a fretful, rather selfish
erson, who suffered from nervous
leadaches, and on tho strength of
them took very little intere-t in the
affairs of her smal and ttrnitened
household, except to perpetually find
fault, and grumble at the hard fate
that had placed her in such circum
stances. She was a pretty woman, with soft
fair hair and violet eyes, and useless
jii.ua wiuiiB iuiuum ; aiiu luougu xauiu
Bertram felt it keenly when her father
. brought home a young wifo to tho
Dingle, sho did not wonder when she
looked at tho pretty clinging girl who
looked little older than herself, and
seemed! so sweet, shy and amiable.
Edith was fifteen, and her step-mother
twenty-two, though she did not look
nearly 60 old. And just at first, things
went on smoothly enough at the Dingls
Mrs. Uertram made no changes, and
Edith was still housekeeper, and took
care of her father as she had dono for
five years ever since her own mother
had died. But after a few months the
, sweetness and shyness rubbed off, and
Mrtjj Bertram exhibited a sharpness of
temper and petulance of manner that
was anything but pleasant. The
doctor, amiable and easy-tempered to
a fault, gave in to her in everything.
First she had Edith's drawing-master
sent away, as she thought it mere
waste of time and money ; then the
music-teacher was dismissed on the
plea that, as Edith was not going to
bo a musical governess, it was absurd
to keep on learning, as she played quite
well enough already. Then Mrs.
Bertram began to find fault with Jack
Clifford, the doctor's assistant, and
made it so unpleasant for him that he
declared one day ho could not stand it
any longer.
"I've made up my mind to go to tho
Cape, Edith, to make my fortune," ho
said, and she could only bid him good
bye, with tear-dimmed eyes and fal
tering voice. She could not a3k him
to stay, for It did not seem like home
at the Dingle, and all her authority
was gone.
" But I'll come back, Edith," Jack
added, holding both her hands. "I'll
return to you. Will you trust me,
darling, and wait?"
"Yes, Jack, I will," she replied,
Bimply. And the next day he left with
a formal farewell. Only Edith knew
what a disappointment it was to Jack,
and how all his hopes were blighted
and liia plans altered. The doctor had
promised to make him his partner, and
that one day he should succeed him;
but for some inexplicable reason ho
Jiad been cold and distant of late, and
it seemed a positive relief when Jack
wa gone.
mouths a.'tr the baak in which
Dr. Bertram had deposit ed the savings
of Ids whole life, and Edith's fortune
inherited from her mother, failed suJ
denly everything was lost, and the
doctor never recovered the shock of it.
"If I only had Jack to stand by me
I might have borne it," he raid, sadly;
"he would have been a son tJ mo in
my adve sity."
K 'But Jack wat gone, none knew
whither, and Mrs. Hertram began to
mi dy realize that she h::d clone a fool
.1 tiiinc in drivim: him away, for the
doctor grew every day more feeble,
und ent length was forced to sell his
practice nnd huuse, ftnd move iato u
t!ny cottaga on tho outskirts of tho
vill gf, where, after a few months, ho
died of a broken heart. Tin money ho
had received for his prantica and tho
Jungle, and an insurance on his life,
was all In had t j leave his wifo and
children, and in vestal in tin most care
ful way, it brought them in less than a
hundred a yeat.
Poor Edith found it hard work to
make both ends of sue i a narrow in
come meet, and after a few months
she found it absolutely necessary to do
something to earn more money. She
could not go away as a governess
first, because her btspmother had cut
short her education at the most critical
Urn?, and, beside, sho could not leave
her little sisters. But her music sin
had always kept up, and the village
church happening to bo in need of an
organist, the vioar offered her tho situ
ation, which sho gratefully accepted;
and after a time site secured a few
music pupils, and in that way helped
out their narrow income. But the
hardest work of all was teaching and
taking care of Blanche and Eva. They
were pretty, willful, spoiled children,
indulged by thdr mother, and unac
customed to B,ny sort of control or .dis
cipline. During the doctor's lifetime
they had a nutsjry governess, and
Edith never imagined till she came to
have sole chargo of them how much
poor Miss Leo must have suffered at
their hands.
There wa3 but one bright spot in
the rather wearing, monotonous life,
tho daily walk with the children. For
their health's fake and her own she
made a point of taking them out every
fine day for a ramble through the
woods and shady lanes. Ashmead was
iu tho center of a beautiful country ;
not a railway in sight ; no smoke from
furnace or factory staino I the clear,
puro air ; nothing but rich corn-fie!ds,
fertile valleys, cool fchady woods and
mossy lanes, with a merry little brook
flashing like a gleam of summer light
ning through the meadows. It wai a
poiitlve delight to saunter idly along
in the gloriotn sunshine and gather the
wild flowers that grew so luxuriantly
at their feet, and weaye ropes and
chains and wreaths of blossoms. It
seemed like new life to get clear of the
house, with its narrow conlines and
sordid care3; and of late thera had
cornea new element of distress into
poor Enith's existence. For a whole
year Dr. Seymour Ashby, her father's
successor, had beon a constant visitor
at Eglantine cottage. It was amazing
how many excuses he found for calling
at first, and how soon he began to call
without an excuse, and one day he pro
posed in due form to Mrs. Bertram for
Edith, and she gave him every en
couragement to try his fortune for him
self. ' Of course you'll accept him,
Edith," she said, eagerly. "It win be
such a blessing to us all. Dr. Ashby
is young, rich, clover, handsome. What
more can you possibly want? And he
really loves you most devotedly."
" But I don't love him," Edith re
plied.
" Then you ought, and I'm sure you
will in time ; and beside, as I said be
fore, some one of us must make a sac
rifice for the children's sake. Do
think it over before he talks to you,
Edith."
"Yes, I'.'l think it over," was the
somewhat weary reply, aa Edith put
on her hat and took up her basket to
Join the children, who wero waiting
impatiently outside.
But it was not of Dr. Ashby, but of
Jack Clifford, that sho thought, as she
sauntered through the fields Jack,
who had left her six years before to
make his fortune, and, despite his
promise, had never returned.
CHAPTER II,
Knee-deop, apparently, in the golden,
full-eared wheat, Edith and her sisters
sauntered idly along, Eva first, gather
ing the brightest of everything, till
her basket was full ti overflowing
scarlet poppies, Marguerites, graceful
clematis, rich leaves mellowing with
the first early autumn tints, long trail
ing sprays of amb T-veine 1 ivy, and
no.ldmg golden grasses all sorts of
wayside and woodland treasures. They
were returning from lla'.eldell farm,
where the children had rested for half
an hour, and eaten home-male bread
and butter, and drank milk with the
yellow wrinkled cream on it, and
helped themselves to the remains of
late amber gooseberries that bordered
the garden path. It was always a
treat to go to llazeldell farm, but had
Edith known that there were seven
children ill in tho next farmhouse she
would have chosen some other direc
tion. She had trie I to tlrnk Dr. Ash
by'a proposal over calmly, and it cer
tainly seemed a safe and easy way out
of all their difficulties. He was rii h
and willing to undertake the children's
education; In would make an addition
to Mrs. Bertram's income, which would
enable her to live in comfort at some
watering place (though Mrs. Bertram
meant to make the Dingle her home);
everything he proposed was kind nd
thoughtful, and she was very grateful,
but iu heart sha felt she, did not love
Seymour Ashby, and, what was more
than that, she never should love him.
Friendship, esteem, affection psrhaps,
she, might ia time bj tibia to give him,
but no second growth of love would
ever spring up iu her heart. Edith's
was an intense, patient, faithful na
ture, giving rnueh and evading little
in return. She win willing towa t, as
6Ui U3'4 promise J ack Clifford, ta w&t
nil her life If need -knt there were
the children and In i- ,rrfother help
less and dependent on her. Clearly
some one would have to make a sac
rifice, nnd with equal clearness Edith
saw that it must be herself. So sho
resolved (o accept Dr. Ashby's pro
posal, and tried to assure hersolf that
ahe was acting for the btst.
l'resently she heard a step behind
iter on tho narrow path, and looking
rouuu sue saw the doctor approach
ing; a t ill handsome man, dressed in
a suit of tweed, with a g engarry cap
pulled down over his eyes ; as different
from his predecessor, Dr. Bertram, as
a man could be, but with a dash and
cleverness men of the old school never
possessed.
"I have been trying to overtake you
for ten minutes, Miss Edith," he said,
falling just a step behind, for the path
was too narrow for two. "I have
something of Importance to say to
you."
" Yes, doctor," she replied calmly,
though her heart beat fast ana every
trace of color left her face.
"You know what I would say,
Edith you must have seen during
all those months how I love you. I
want you to by my wife. Your mother
has given me permission to address
you, and given me some little reason
to hope that you will listen to me.
Tell me, Edith, can you or do you care
a little about me ?"
For a minute or two Edith was
silent, then she told him all the. truth,
how they were situated, how she had
liked Jack Clifford, but for six years
had not heard anything of him, and
how, if she consented to be his wifo,
ho must be content with mere esteem
and affection, for 6he had no love to
bestow.
" You aro honest, Edith, and truth
ful," he said in a very low voice, "and
I thank you for the confidence you
have reposed in me, but I must think
this matter over. I love you far too
well to risk your happin ;ss in any way.
Six years is a long time to be faithful
to a silent lover, Edith."
" We were scarcely lovers, doctor,"
sho replied, with a sad little smile.
"Jack just said, 'I'll come back Edith;
will you wait?' and I said I would
that was all. But poor papa was alive
then, and we were rich ; now every
thing is so different. For myself, I am
content as I a n, but the children I"
" Ah, yes, the children something
must be done for them. They are far
too much for you. Did you say Jack
Clifford went to the Cape, Edith, and
that you never heard from him?"
" Yes, he said he was going to make
his fortune in the diamond fields, but
he never wrote, so I dare say he was
not successful, poor fellow I Indeed, I
think lie must be dead."
"I think not." Da Ashbyreplied,
thoughtfully. "Once more, Edith, I
thank you heartily for your candor and
confidence, and I will come to you for
your final answer at the end of a
month. Till then, good-bye," and the
doctor luted his cap, and turned down
a by-path that led to the Dingle, and
poor Edith went homs more perplexed
than ever.
"It's a wholo month since we've
seen Dr. Ashby whatever did you say
to him, Edith?" Mrs. Bertram sa:d
one evening; "the house has soemed
wretchedly dull without him. You
did not surely refuse him point
blank V
"No, I did not refuse him," Edith
replied, wearily; she hail answered
nearly the same question every day for
four weeks, and was tired of it. She
was looking pale and worn, but Mrs.
Bertram never hsul eyes for any one's
illness but her own.
"Mamma," Eva cried, bursting into
the room, " here's the doctor and an
other gentleman !"
And Mrs. Bertram smoothed her
fluffy hair and put on her amiable
smile, while Edith's heart began to
beat fiercely. She had thought the
matter over from every point of view,
add at length came to the conclusion
that it would be positively wicked to
marry the doctor while Jack Clifford
was so much in her thoughts, and,
come what might, she would not do it.
Presently he came in alone, and,
after a few moments' conversation, he
asked her to walk with him for a few
minutes in the garden. She went at
once, longing to have the interview
over, and burst into the subject di
rectly. "I cannot be your wife, Dr.
Ashby; I think it would be wrong of
me to accept your proposal, feeling as
I do. rieaso try and forgive mo and
let me go."
"First, let me introduce my friend, V
he said, laying his hand on her arm,
" and my new assistant the work of
Ashmead is rather too much for me
Miss Bertram Mr. Clifford."
" Jack 1" In a moment she was in
his arms, her face hidden on his
shoulder, all the long years of absence
and silence forgotten. ho only felt
that he had returned, and she was
still free. Later she learned how it
had all come about how Dr. Ashby
saw an advertisement in the paper,
and guessed that "J no. C'must mean
Jack Clifford, lately returned from the
Cape, and several old letters ha dis
covered in a diawer in one of the
ro ivis of the Dingle convinced him
that there was treachery at work
somewhere. 8d he just engaged Ja'-k,
an l then to d him all about the Ber
trams, and how Edith was still fa;th
ful to him, though she. never received
cue of hii Jitters.
The result was a very quiet wedding
in Ashmead church, and on that daj
Dr. Ashby handed over the Dingle and
the practice to his partner, and went
to travel in South America, promising
to return about the time Blanche was
seventeen. Bot h tin children he placed
at s hool, and Mrs. l?ertram,feeling vert
much ashamed of the part she had
played in intercepting Jack's letters,
left Ashnead, and in a few years
married a retired merchant at
Brighton, and so never troubled her
stepdaughter further.
Jack Clifford is fast becoming tha
most popular doctor for miles around
and when Seymour Ashby returns, If
he ever does, he will find the practice
greatly extended. Edith is perfectly
happy in her old homo, the Dingle,
and never for a moment has regretted
her perfect faith in Jack.
A K.tcatchcr's Methods.
In an interview with a professional
ratcatcher a New York Sun reporter
aked :
"How do you clear a house of rats?"
" If the house has a "soft cellar floor
I can get the rats out, but I can't keep
them out. If it has a hard founda
tion, I hunt out all the holes leading
from tho sewers and stop them up
with sand and cement. That prevents
any more from getting in and those in
the house from escaping. You see, a
rat is always on the move. He is
never still, but goes from the sewer to
the house and back again very often.
Having made the cellar tight, I find
the runways by whl :h the rats go
from one floor to another. These are
generally along lead pipes in the walls.
A rat will run up a lead pipe as (asy
as walk along the floor. You can see
tin marks of their feet on the runway.
I nail :i small square piece of tin over
a part of the runway and I grease the
outsida. Now, a rat can't run up this,
and he slips down when he comes to it.
" If I can't get at the runways I find
tne holes, and fix this wire door on it,
You see, it is made of four pieces of
short wire hiid DaralleL held ton-ether
wy crossbars, and sharpened at tho
ends. This is suspended by the top
over a rat-hole. Coming from the hole
a rat can easily lift it up and get
through, but In can't go back, as the
gate falls and the sharp points prevent
mm trom lilting it. Now I make a
rat trap of the wholo house. I so fix
the gates and tin sides that the rats
will all bo led into one room in the
basement. There they are securely
caught, as they cannot possibly get
out. I go among them with a dark
lantern and pick them up with my
tongs. I can catch them as quietly as
a cat would a mouse. If they get in
places where I can't reach them I
shoot them with this long target
pistol. I use these litcle target cart
ridges, and it kills them every time.
"When the rats get in ceilings I
smother them out with cayenne pep
per. 1 have a fumigator here which
works like an air pump. I burn red
pepper in it and pump it into the ceil
ing. The rats can't stand that, and
they got out a3 fast as they can.
That is better than a ferret, as ferrets
are expensive and the rats often kill
them. Ferrets are scary things to
handle. If they bite you once you
have to pry their jaws open. When I
want to catch rats for dogs I set
traps. First I remove everything out
of their way, so that they will get
very hungry. Then I set tho traps.
Then I have another way of catching
them. I wear rubber shoes into a
slaughter-house at night and carry a
dark lantern. I move softly about
and catch the rat3 with the tongs
before they have a chance to get
away. In this way I haye caught
103 rats in two hours and a half. If
you ever get bitten by a rat, put tin
wound in hot water and make it bleed.
Then bathe it with arnica or spirits
of turnentine."
A Wond rful tavern.
About a mile from the market town
of Adelsberg. in Austria, and three
miles from Trieste, is to be seen tha
most wonderful cavern in Europe, and
possibly in tho world, called the Adels
berg cave, and which has been explored
for a length of nearly three thousand
yards, as far as a subterranean lake.
This cavern consists of several grottoes,
from sixty to eighty feet high. The
interior resounds with the noiso of
water, as a little river runs completely
through it, forming many cascades on
its way. and being finally lost to view
in a fissure, 'lhis river continues its
subterranean courso for about eight
miles, and after a time it disappears
into tho caverns of Laase, whence it
emerges as a navigable river called the
Laibach. The entrance to the cave of
Adelsberg is illuminated by hundreds
of candles, and a transparent curtain,
composed of large sheets of crystallized
lime.itone, is seen hanging from tho
roof. The vast hall or ballroom is
about 10 yards from the entrance. It
is threo hundred feet long and one
hundred feet high, and is adorned with
transparent stalactites of every kind of
fantastic shape and form. Until the
year 1819, this ballroom was the only
part known; but at this date the wail
if stalagmite was broken through, and
a series of chambers exposed to view
possessing a cathedral-like appearance,
from the stalactites in many instance
forming vast columns, by meeting the
stalagmites below. Ia the Adelsberg
tilvein, numerous specimens are found
of the proteui, a kind of lizard that
dwell Ja thq bottom of tli9 cayera
Ukuit,
SCIENTIFIC AND INDUSTRIAL,
. A man in Pittsburt?. Fenn.. has in
vented a potato-digger which, it ial
claimed, will do tho work of twentyr
men.
At a recent reception given by M.
Louis Ban, in Paris, each of the lady
guests about to take part in a dance
was presented with a bouquet in the
middle of which shone a miniature
electric lamp fed by batteries devised
by M. Trouve.
The world's largest animals are dis
appearing. The elephant is said to be
rapidly approaching extinction, and In
the interest of science it i3 suggested
that tho British government interfere
to prevent the further destruction of
this gigantic creature in India.
Nature creates by the million, ap
parently that she may destroy by the
myriad. She gives life one instant,
only that she may snatch it away the
next The main difference is that the
higher we ascend the less lavish the
creation, and the less sweeping the de
struction. Thus, while probably but
one fish in a thousand reaches ma
turity, of every 1,000 children born,
604 attain adulc age. That is, naturo
flings aside 999 out of every 1,000
fishes as useless for her purposes, and
two out of every five human beings.
Dogs, rabbits and Guinea pigs were
kept by M. Poincare in an atmosphere
resembling that which is usually
breathed by persons who use petro
leum. The Guinea pigs alone suc
cumbed after remaining from one to
two years in this medium. The other
Animals appeared to resist indefinitely.
He nevertheless recommends persons
employing petroleum as source of
heat or light, or who treaT it indus
triously, to keep their stock in closed
vessels, to attend to ventilation, and to
execute the operations cf rectification,
stc, under draught-hoods.
From observations made in New
York and neighboring cities. Dr. A. A.
Julien concludes that the various
stones tised for buildings will retain
a detent appearance in walls for the
following periods : Coarse brown
stone, from 5 to 15 years ; laminated
fine brown stone, from 25 to 50 years ;
compact fine brown stone, from100 to
200 years ; Nova Scotia stone, prob
ably from 50 to 100 years ; Ohio Band
stone, 100 years ; Caen stcne, from 35
to 40 years; coarse dolomite marble,
40 years ; fine marble, 60 years ; pure
calcareous marble, from 50 to 100
years ; granite, according to variety,
from 75 to 200 years. Among the
chief destroyers of the stones are sol
vent substances washed from the air
by rains, and the heat of the sun.
A White Arache.
The Tombstone (Arizona) Republi
can of recent date says: A few days
since a Hermcsillo dispatch announced
the wounding and capture of a white
man, supposed to be L. N. Streeter,
while heading an Affache foray.
Streeter is about fifty years of age and
was born in California, his father being
captain of an English merchantman
trading on the Pacific coast and his
mother a native Californian. Of his
boyhood or early manhood very little
is known, he first c m ng into notice
In Arizona by his connection a3 clerk
with the San Carlos agency during
Governor Safford's administration in
this Territory. While there he had
some difficulty with the official?, caused,
it is said, by his giving aid and comfort
to hostile Apaches. Ho left there
suddenly and went straight for the
camp of Juh and GeroDimo, which
was then near Janos Pass, on the line
between Sonora and Chihuahua. It is
stated that while he was at the agency
he became enamored of a squaw be
longing to the tribe, nnd it was this
fact that induced his leaving civiliza
tion to cast his fortunis with the
Apaches. Governor Safford offered a
large reward for his apprehension,
some stories placing the amount as
high as $5,000. lie was not appre
hended, however, and lias never re
turned to Arizona.
lie is said by those knowing him
intimately, to be very intelligent and
well educated, and a manuscript now
n the hands of the writer, written
while Streeter was at Grenadois, goes
to prove it. He speaks the A a;he
dialect fluently, and is said to have
great influence with them. His stand
ing among the savages, by whom he is
known as Don Cassamario, may be
seen when it is known that the elde-t
son of Chief Geronimo is named for
turn
A Shower of Birds.
The most remarkablo phenomenon
relating to Iowa 6torn;s occurred at
Independence not long ago, when the
people at night were aroused by a loud
pelting against tho windows, which
could not bo account 'd for until the
morn'ng, when thousands of birds
were found dead all over the city. It
had been a literal shower of birds, and,
s'ranger still, nobo !y had ever seen
such birds before. In size they M ere a
trifle larger than a snowbird and their
color much like a quail. It is sup
posed they were drawn into a vortex
way down South and rushed through
the atmosphere thoo thousands of
miles.
The bart ty of railroad traveling is
forcibly illustrated in tho statement
that ot the 41,1-0,-5 passengers ear
ri"dby ra'lrou ls ti rmitiaiing in Bur
top Just year lut eijfUt were killed,
THE MAN WHO NEVER ADVEfW
T15ES.
inff, business mnse, the dark and dolefo
fate
Of him who labors bnt that he may wait:
The piles of goods heaped up within his itotJ .
Which can't be lees, and never may b more.
The man whose life has lost all fort-na't
prizos:
In fact, the man who never advertiwe.
Bing of his start, his great ambitic
The capital that gave him cause to hc-
His creditlarge, bis fall and ample stock,
His bank account as solid aa a rock;
Then fell the doom to which the man ws
fated
Who never advertised, bnt simply wailed.
So simply, and so vainly! Splendid signs.
Which basement art irradiates and refines:
Flate glass show windows, elegantly dressed.
Such lyvely clerks, cashiers, and all the rest.
Served bnt to show him bow the public size
The style of him who never advertises.
He waited, and all waited; clerks, cashiers,
Saletmen, saleswomen each doligUtfaf
dears-
Impatient waited all the season through.
With precious little for the crowd to do.
The public saw that fact there's no deny
ing
Bat passed the store without a thought of
baying.
Business was dull, but salaries and rent
Went on till cash and credit both were spent;
The silly merchant hoped his lack would turn
Until the sheriff closed the whole concern. :
Now, at a pittance which his soal despises,
He works for one who always advertises. , .
HUMOR OF THE DAY.
Things worth noing Invitations to
drink. '
Many patients at our best hospitals
receive gruel treatment. Life. .
Why are bores like trees ? Because
we love them best whell' they leave.
Derrick, '
Breaches of promise Those your
tailor didn't bring home. Chicago
Herald.
A bee often meets with reverses,
but as a rule he is successful in the
end. Rochester Express.
"I Bpread my waves from poll to
poll," remarked the wig-maker as he
rented another capillary adornment.
Dr. Potter, of New York, laments
"the decay of enthusiasm." He should
watch the small boy on the morning
of the circus.
Rev. Dr. Pusey left a personal estate
of more than $80,000. All his property
goes to his daughter, Miss Mary Ame
lia Brine. That is to say it Is all salted
down.
A genius advertised "A sewing
machine for twenty-five cents in
stamps," and his dupes did not see the
point until they received a cambric
needle. ISookkceper.
Birigham Young's grave is utterly
neglected, and his widows never visit
it. They went there once to cry over
his remains, but it made the ground so
sloppy that they all caught cold.
Joseph Cook has written an article
on tobacco, but fails to teach tho
secret of the art of carrying cigars in
his vestfpocket in such a manner that
one's friends cannot detect them,
I'uck.
A Western paper announces the fact
that an acrobat turned a somersault
on a locomotive smokestack. That is
lothing. We know of an engineer
who turned on the steam. Philadel
phia News.
The New York Sun comes out with
the usual announcement that every
woman in the land ought to learn how
to swim. No woman knows how soon
she may get tumbled off a street car.
Detroit Free Press.
. A Troy girl was made stark, staring
mad by the excitement of the prepa
rations fur her own wedding. She
ought to have waited till she had been
married a little while, when she could
have found real provocation for get
ting mad.
It is said that a young lady can
never whistle in tha presence of her
lover. The reason ia obvioua. He
doesn't give her a chance. When she
gets her lips in a proper position foi
whistling something eLse always occurs.
Rochester Post.
A San Antonio lawyer doe3 an im
menso business, according to his card
in a local paper. The card reads : " I
attend to all the business in the State
and Federal courts." This must make
it hard for the other lawyers to make
a living. Sifting.
A Missouri maiden's mistake: One
of the sweetest-looking girls in the
State of Missouri dislocated her
shoulder the other day by kicking a
cat. Handsome is as handsome does,
but she should not kick with her right
arm. Atchison Ulohe,
A girl shouldn't wear a black belt
about her waist when she's got a
white dress on and i3 walking with a
young man in the night time. It
makes it appear from a rear window
a j if her fellow bad his arm around
her waist. Mttfafo Kewtt.
Boston girls never sacrifice tho cause
of culture to that of philanthropy. A
tramp recently aecustcd one of them
and asked her if she would be good
enough to give him ''the price of an
humble meal. "1 haven't any mouey
with me," she said, " but it you'll eonr
around to the houie utter a ret'
home I'll get him to read yo
ta? cf Ti rana Lo t-'" ,
1