tin forest gtpuMkaa.
IB TUnLUHED EVERY WEDNESDAY, lit
ST. 33.
OFFICE IN SOBIK30N k BONNER' 8 BUllT)n!
ELM STREET, TIONEJTA, PA.
Rates of Advertising.
On Square (1 inch,) ono Insertion - ?'
One iiare " one month - -.If:!
One. Square " three )nonlhs - (It1
OneN'iiiaro " ono ypm' - - 10 0o
Two .Squares, one year - -. . - 0
Quarter Col. ' - ' - - - :') ( 0
Half " " - ' - 50 CO
One " " - - - - 100 CO
Legal notice at established rates.
Carriage and desth notices, gratis. '
All bills for yearlv advertisements col.
lected quarterly. Temporary n.lvortipe
ments must bo paid for in advance.
Job work. Cash on lehverr.
TERMS, 11.80 TSAR.
No Subscriptions received for a shorter
p rkl than throe month.
Correspondence sollcitod irom all parts
ol tlif country. No notice will ho taken of
anonymous communications.
VOL. XIV. NO. 21. TIONESTA, PA., AUG. 17, 1881.
$1.50 Per Annum,
mm
The Long Journey.
When our weary foot become heavy and weary
On the vallnys and mountains of life,
And the road,has grown dusty and dreary,
And we groan in the stragglo and strife.
We halt on the difficult pathway
Wo glance hack over valloy and'plain,
And sigh with a sorrowful longing
To travel the Jonrncy again.
For wo know in the past there aro pleasures,
And seasons of joy and delight,
While before ail is doubting and darkness,
And dread of tbo gloom and tho night;
All bright sunny spots we remember
- How littlo we thought of thorn ihenl
But now we are looking and longing.
To rest in those places again.
But vain of the vainest is sighing,
Our course must be forward and on;
Wo CHiinot turn bnck on tho jonrncy,
We cannot enjoy what is gone.
Ijct ns hope, then, as onward we travel
That oases may brighten tho plain,
That our roads bo botido tho sweet waters,
Though wo may not begin it again.
For existence forever goos upward
From tho hill to tho mountain ts rise,
On, on, o'er invisible summits,
To a laud in the limitless skies.
Strive on, then, with courago unshaken
Truo labor is never iu vain
Nor glance with regret at the pathway
No mortal can travel again.
The Baroness' Jewel Box.
FROM THE GERMAN.
The Baroness Rukavina Eltz was the
most splendid and dashing personage in
the Er valley. Her castle near 8omlyo
was the llnest specimen of a great resi
dence iu all that shadow of the Ermel
lek, ami she, a Roumanian by birth,
and a Hungarian by marriage, seemed
to unite all the brilliant characteristics
of both these picturesque raceR.
She was a wid w to begin with, and
since the animal, man, has 8jeculatoo
Up'"ii Mi.-rtiie i. u; the angel, woman,
a widow Las been pronounced the most
amiable vurit-ty ot the species. Sht
was very beautiful, tall, blue-eyed,
black-haired, piquant, red and white,
with the most scornful little mouth, auo
the most delicate profile; her hand and
foot wero models, although the lattei
was frequently stamped when she wac
not. pleased. She was in the . third
' and last plaoe, as the preachers say-
very rich, and had fallen heiress to two
collections of jewels which were almost
fabulously valuable. A brilliant crea
ture, the baroness. She owned villages
and vineyards, and made a large income
every year from her sale of raster, a
wine of a pale golden hue, which had
as full and peculiar a favor as she had
herself. Tlxb baroness sent her wine to
Vienna where it was considered almost
equal to Tokay. Of course she had
suitors, the beautiful, sharp baroness,
They came from Transylvania and Rus
fiia, from Roumania and all Hungary,
from Austria and from the German
principalities, and as for the unlucky
wretches about Puspoki, and the Betiar
settlement, and the country gentlemen
of Erdiozech. thev knelt and worshined
in vain as she da-Led past them on tier
fleet thoroughbred, for she was Diana,
as a huntress, and the queen of the
amazons; also her black horse Tetenyer
was said to emit fire from his nostrils
when he stopped to breathe.
This grand ladv was afraid of nobody,
loved nobody, had no friends save the
nuns at the foot of the Rez Gebirge and
-one old priest who seemed to be deeply
in her confidence. Every year she made
a grand vis.it somewhere V lenna,
Pans. Home, London or bt. Petersburg,
She spent money like water, mi.de
everybody talk, wonder and admire, and
her tplondid jewels were the envy of all
the court ladies.
Yes fcho was afraid of one man, and
that wu8 her steward, Nensiedler, he
who for years had managed her vast es
tates, her vineyards and her wheat fields,
her holds and fisheries.
Neusiedler was a crouching, cross
eyed, mean-looking man, married to a
bold, black-eyed, large-nosed woman,
who wai twice his size, and who lived
in tho village, near the castle, and who
spent her time envying and hating the
baronness. Madame Pasteur, the French
companion, and Matilde, the French
maid, who never left the baroness,
thought that "Neusiedler and his wife
had the evil eye, and that they would
some day wilt the baroness. Cut Ruka
vina Eltz laughed at this fear, and kept
on her course exultant. Still when the
yearly payday came round, and she had
to look over accounts with Neusiedler,
she did show what she never had shown
before fear.
Among her jewels was a splendid
rope of pearl-colored pearls, the rarest
tlung in the whole world, neither black
nor white, but pearl color, with three
great emerald pendants, each as large
as a small pear. The emperor always
noticed this jewel with a smile and a
compliment when the Uaroness Ruka
vina Eltz went to a coijrt ball at Vienna.
He told her that the empress had noth
ing half as handsome, and it is to be
feared that the emperor spoke also of
the white neck on which the necklace
rested, for Rukavina Eltz was apt to
blush and look magnificently well at
such moments. Then she had great
chains of sapphires as blue as her eyes,
and some big rubies which the baron
had given her (the old baron, twice her
age, who went down into Roumania for
her when she was fifteen); and she had
diamonds, of course every rich lady
has diamonds and a grand boxful of
engraved amethysts and antique gems.
Home, that Cardinal Antonelli gave her
in Rome, for lie, too, had admired the
wild baroness.
Indeed, if the Baroness Rukavina
Eltz had ever written her memoirs what
a story she could have told! But the
end of every woman's history is that she
finally falls in love : and such was the
beginning of the end of the story of
Rukavina Eltz. She went to England
one summer, and there was a young
Lord Ronald Homerset.or a Lord George
LevesAn Montague, or a young Lord
Howard Tlantagenet (they mix them up
so , these English words, they are not
half so individual as our Hungarian
names), who could ride better than she
could. This was a dreadful blow to the
baroness, and she wished herself dead.
But when at dinner the soft-voiced,
handsome, tall young Englishman, Sir
Lyster Howard Lyster (that was his
name after all) sat next to her and
talked so well and was so, complimen
tary to her seat, cross-country, and
noticed the pearl-colored pearls, and
tho emeralds, with his lips, and the neck
with his eyes, Rukavina Eltz forgave
him and began to talk of her home near
Somlyo, and it ended in a large English
party coming to the Er valley, under
tho shadow of the Er Mellek, lor a long
summer visit. And how they raved
about everything the wine, the horses,
tbe scenery, the wild, barbano splendor
of the baroness' housekeeping, and
how -they all hated Neusiedler, and his
big, black-browed wife, who were in
vited up to the balls.
There was an English lady, one with
very long teeth, and a very long nose
and very high eyebrows, and they
called her Lady Louisa. She was very
grand and lofty, and Madam Pasteur
heard her say one day :
"Do you know, dear baroness, I think
you are very careless don't you know ?
about those beautiful jewels of vours
do vou know ?"
''But who could steal them?" said
tho baroness, laughing. " There are
none like them in all Hungary, and no
one would dare to wear them, they are
so rare I
"Ah I but some of these wild people
of yours! They might swallow your
emeralds, those fierce Croats, the Rou
manians, and then you keep them in
nch open closets and boxes' Madam
Pasteur nodded her meek head, too
She had trembled for the jewels always.
But the baroness and Sir Lyster begrn
to think of other things than jewels;
there were moonlight rides and walks,
and there were long talks and many
reveries; Lady Louisa went home, they
all went, but toir Lyster came back.
And then, one evening, Madam Pas
teur said afterward that she saw Neu
siedler come in and bully the baroness,
and t-he heard him hiss out the words
Remember if you marry, you lose
all. Remember the baron s will I -
And Rukavina Eltz turned pale and
said, " Bully, traitor, fiend," between
her shut teeth, She went off to Pans,
for one of her long visits, and JNeusied
ler squeezed the tenants, and made
every one miserable. The castle was
shut up, and black Tetenyer grew thin
in his stable.
When she came back she looked older
and more sedate. She went often to see
the nuns at the foot of Rez Gebirge.
She saw the priest also very often, and
Madam Pasteur thought she was growing
devote. . But she dressed in her usual
dashing colors (for she was a very Rou
manian at heart) and she wore one of
those scarlet quilted petticoats that the
English ladies wore so much, and very
pretty it looked, with her dark habit
and her dark dresses looped up over it.
This, with a scarlet feather in her hat,
looked as if the baroness was thinking
of England.
It was a miserable day that, when
Madam Pasteur and Matilde came
screaming down the long corridor.
" The jewels are gone I gone 1 gone !"
The baroness had the great bell of
the castle rung, and Neusiedler was
sent for at once. She was very pale, for
she loved those pearls and emeralds,
Neusiedler was composed : every look
was made to say, " I told you so ;" he
had always warned her about the jewels
44 What can be done ?" asked the bar
oness.
44 Search, whip, imprison all who at
tempt to leave the province," said Neu
siedler, calmly.
" Except women I will have no
women whipped, said the baroness.
"I am glad to hear that," said Neu
siedler, laughing his malicious laugh,
" for Madam Neusiedler goes to Vienna
to-morrow.
"Ah !" said the baroness, 44 you know
I could not mean, at any rate, that Mad
am Neusiedler should be disturbed
send her in my littlo carriage with the
three pomes to Erdiozogh."
"Your excellency is very condescend
ing," said Neusiedler, bowing to the
ground. .
The local police sought everywhere
lor the lost jewels, but no trace of them
could be found. The baroness sat in a
sort of stupor, and gazed, out of the
window.
" I will go to "England 1" said she
hastily, one day. " Neusiedler some
money, and arrange for me to be gone
three months.
" It is well madam," said the steward
It was a very roundabout route that
the baroness took for England I "When
Matilde and Madam Tasteur reached the
station at Erdiozegh, they were aston
ibhed to see the baroness dash into the
ticket office and buy tickets for Vienna,
and when they arrived, all of them at
her tine hotel at lenna, who should
step out to meet them but Sir Lyhter
Howard Lyster I
Nothing but the well known eccen
tricity of the baroness apologized to
Madam Pasteur for what followed.
She commanded two dresses to be
made, and that Madam Pasteur should
go with her to a masked ball at the
opera house in Vienna.
" Sir Lyster Howard Lyster will go
with tis !" said she, as a shade passed
over tbe pale face of her companion.
Oh I that the lady of sixteen quarter-
ings should be seen in such a low place I
No, she was not seen I she was masked ;
but that she should even go 1 What a
sacrifice of pride and of decency,
Madam Tasteur thought it, as she saw
the baroness take the arm of one masked
man after the other, and then go into
the supper room with a party who fol
lowed a tall mask in a black domino.
A voice struck on Madam Pasteur's
ear was it that of Madam Neusiedler'fl?
Was it could it be ?
Yes ! and as she threw back mask and
hood there sparkled on her neck the
pearl-colored pearls, and the emerald
pendants of the lost jewels. Oh, heaven I
lho necklaco of the baroness,"
shouted the impulsive, the imprudent
Madam Pasteur.
It nearly spoiled the plot, for Madam
Neusiedler was amongst friends and
confederates. However, the tall Eng
lishman stepped forward, and two Vien
nese policemen arrested the woman.
She behaved with extraordinary cool
ness, and explained : ' ,
"It is indeed the necklaco of the
baroness, given by her to my husband
for moneys which he has advanced to
her. Let her deny it if she dare 1 I
have her written acknowledgment of
the money, and I have come to Vienna
to sell the necklace where it is well-
known."
The people gathered around the won
derful necklace, which the chief of
police put in his breast pocket, remov
mg the woman Neusiedler.
lho baroness went back to her hotel,
and allowed Madam Pasteur to pass a
wretched night, one would explain
nothing.
All V lenna was alive when the great
case came on, and not a few ladies were
glad to hear that the Rukavina Eltz
jewels were in pawn that envied neck
lace I
Neusiedler came to his wife's rescue,
and told the story over again. .The
evidence against the baroness was damn
ing. She had, according to his story.
lived far, far beyond her income, and
ho had supplied her with money from
the money-lenders, ohe had fabricated
the story of the lost necklace to try and
cheat him, bnt here were her signatures,
and here was the baron s will, which
she was about to try to disregard. His
will, saying that she would never marry.
or, if she did, that she lost all her vast
estates.
" Baroness Rukavina Eltz, what have
you to say to this ? What is your de
fense?" said the prosecuting counsel.
"Only this 1 said the baroness, hold
ing up in her hand the pearl-colored
pearls and the emerald drops, the real
necklace 1 On the judge's desk lay a
fac-simile of the famous necklace; the
two ornaments looked exactly alike.
44 Let an expert be brought and say
which is the real necklace and which
the imitation one, made in Paris, and
used by me to lure this wretched and
dishonest thief of a steward on to his
destruction 1" said the baroness, with a
flash of Roumanian fire in her eyes.
It was truel Neusiedler had been
foiled; he had stolen a false necklace,
which the baroness had had made in the
Rue de la Paix. " He has been stealing
from me for years; he has doubtless
forged a false will of the barou, for I
have found the true one ! sail Ruka
vina Eltz. "I could not unravel the
net that ho has thrown over me, but for
this happy thought of tempting him to
steal some false jewels. Had he got the
real ones his story would have been pos
sible. Now, I trust justice is convinced
that it is a lie 1"
A dreadful noise followed this speech
of the spirited baroness. Neusiedler had
fallen down in a fit. Never more would
he drink the yellow-tinted ruster;
never more would he return to the joys
of crushing the peasantry of Somlyo
of cheating the baroness. The baroness
had cheated him at last ! Sold 1 sold I
sold ! with false pearls and emeralds!
It was a very grand wedding, that of
the baroness to Sir Lyster Howard
Lyster, who though only an English
country gentleman, proved to be richer
than she, and who made her a loving
and a hunting husband.
The emperor gave her away, and she
wore the pearl-colored pearls with the
emerald drops, now become historical.
" Ah I Madame, dear baroness, please
tell me where you have kept the real
jewels all these months 1" said the pious
Madam Pasteur, almost kissing the
hem of her mistress' robes,
Tho baroness was dressed for travel
ing, as her faithful adherent knelt and
asked this question. She had on the
quilted satin red petticoat; the scarlet
of old England.
" Was it in the double-locked closet
of the north tower ?'
44 Ah, no I faithful , Pasteur, thou
knowest Neusiedler had the key to
that!"
44 VPas it in the jewel case of thy great
ancestress, the Roumanian princess?"
41 No. Guess again I"
44 Was it in the convent of the nuns
of Rez Gebirge 1"
" No ! Pasteur. I never gave them
anything to keep but my sins !"
44 Was it ia the baron's strong box in
the cellar?"
44 No, my dear Pasteur, no. You have
the hiding place under your finger.
They wero quilted into the lining of
this red Fat in petticoat. I owe the idea
to that good Lady Louisa. See here?"
and gently raising the edge of her
traveling skirt, right over her left foot
the baroness showed Madam Tasteur
a neat little series of pockets, where the
jewels had been safely hidden in a
scarlet prison.
Sonnets from the Afghanese.
In venturing to publish a few speci
mens of the literature of a remote race,
who have lately attracted the attention
of the whole civilized world, I deem it
necessary to offer a word of explanation,
lest the reader should conclude that
the colloquialisms of Cabool are too
suspiciously like the slang of our own
metropolis. Sir William Leslie, in his
admirable work on the 44 Social Life and
Manners of the Afghans," says: 44 Their
poetry is rude and simple, full of collo
quial phrases, and celebrates only the
primitive passions and most familiar
surroundings of their daily life." It
will be observed that this remark is
eminently true, if the following son
nets are faithfully typical of Pushtaneh
literature. In translating, I have been
at some pains to preserve a natural at
mosphere by substituting for the idioms
of the Pushtu language such of our
own colloquialisms as most nearly cor
respond. In no other way could I pre
serve the viva voce tone of the originals.
No. 1. TO A MULE.
A weird phenomenon, oh, mulo, art thou!
Ono pensive car inclined toward the west,
Tbe other sou'-sou' -east by a littlo sou',
The acme explicate of peace and rest.
But who can tell at what untoward hour
Thy slumbering energy will assert its func
tion, With fervid eloquence and awakening power,
Thy hee-haw and thy heels in wild conjunc
tion? War. havoc, and destruction envy thee!
Ool kick the stuffing out of time and epace 1
Assert thyself, thou child of destiny,
Till nature, stands aghast with frightened
face 1
A greater marvel art thou than the wonder
Of Zeus from high Olympua launching thunder.
No. 2. TO A GOAT.
Thou lmst a serious aspect, bnt methinks
beneath the surface, Billy, 1 discern
A thoughtful tendency to play high-jinks,
A solemn, waiting wickedness supern.
Within tbo amber circle of thine eye
Tin re lurkcth mischief of exsuecous kind
A humor grim, mechanical, and dry;
Evasive, subdolous, and undefined.
I would I understood thee better, Hill.
Beseech thee of thy courtesy explain
Now, doth the flavor of a poster fill
Thy utrnoxt need? Of old uatB art thou fain?
pr'ythee, goat, vouchsafe some information.
Oh, say! Come, now I Get out I Oh, thunder
ationl No. 3. TO TAFFY.
Hail, Taffy, now-born goddess! Thou art come
Into the world emollient and serene,
A'ith liberal hands dispensing balmy gum,
A syrup-mouthed, uiolasses-visaged queen 1
What are thou giving us, oh, gracious ono?
Thou dost assuage our daily cares and toils.
'Tis thine to mollify tho rasping dun,
Thine to alleviate domestic broils;
The lover seeks thy aid to win his joy,
The statesman lookcth toward thee, and the
preacher,
Tho interviewer, and the drummer-boy,
Who di'uuimeth wisely, owning thee for
teacher.
The clani-dispenser tootB thy tuneful praise,
The lightning-roddist kuoweth all thy ways.
I). 8. l'roudfit, in Hcribniv.
A Bear With a Strong Head,
An enterprising and good-natured
visitor at Castle Park, a few days ago, in
generosity of heart presented the bear
with a bottle of beer. Bruin ascended
his throne, and after uncorking the
bottle, drank it, and appeared much
refreshed and well satisfied. This
amused the visitor to such an extent
that he took a glass himself and gave
the bear another bottle. The perform
ance lasted about two hours, the gen
erous visitor drinking bis glass each
time that his bearship put a bottle of
the 44 hop juice" under his belt. At
tbe expiration of the two hours it was
found that bruin had indulged in nine
teen bottles of beer, and his friend had
gotten himself on the outside of nine
teen glasses of the foamy stuff. The
only difference to be discovered between
the two was that bruin was quiet aud
docile, and walked to the end of his
chain with his usual dignified tread,
while tho man imagined that he was
the czar of all the Russias, and was
momentarily expecting to hear an ex
plosive missile burst about him. He
was finally conveyed home 44 upon a
shutter," while the bear quietly walked
his beat and looked anxiously for the
appearance of another fun-loving visitor
who would 44 set em up. Hot bjrngs
Arfc.) keening islar.
Met a Violent Death.
The shooting of the President recalls
the fact that the first Fourth of July
orator this country ever produced died
in a similar manner. In 1778, just two
years after independence had been de
clared, the day was celebrated in
Charleston, S. C. and an oration was
delivered by Dr. David Ramsay. The
latter was an able author, as well as a
phvsician, and published the first history
of America. He married the daughter
of Henry Laurens, the distinguished
patriot, who was for a time imprisoned
in the Tower of London for his devotion
to his country. It is a cuiious fact that
this very David Ramsay was shot in
broad daylight by a lunatic, this being
at the time a new feature in crime. The
weapon was a pistol and the wound was
immediately fatal. Dr. Ramsay was a
member of the first Congress. It con
vened in this city in 178lJ, and included
a remarkable representation of the talent
and patriotism of the country. He was
the first instance of assassination among
our publio men. The patriots of the
Revolution indeed, as a clahs, have
escaped violent death, the . exceptions
being found in James Otis, who was
killed by lightning, and also in Button
Gwinnett and Alexaud r Hamilton, both
of whom were victims of dueling. jYtm
York CviTespniidnic Itoi huxter Democrat.
President Garfield's life is insured for
$25,000 for the benefit of his wife.
Tucblos Ilitcing.
The march past ended, the governor
of San Juan for each pueblo has a
governor of its own nomination and
election gravely walked down to clear
the course. In his hand he bore sb a
scepter what seemed to be a bottle of
whisky, but what in reality was a
whisky bottle filled with gunpowder,
that he distributed as largesse to the
Indians with guns, and behind him
came a company of guards in their
finest clothes, bearing green branches
and wearing a part of them, at least
garlands of green leaves upon their
shocks of hair. These guards he dis
tributed, at intervals of a hundred yards
or so, in couples along the course ; the
couples being taken, apparently, from
the opposite sides. This preliminary
being settled, a tremendous old pa
triarch, with a waving mass of gray hair
down to his shoulders and wrinkled be
yond all expression, stepped out midway
in the track, bearing in his hands an
ancient drum. He was clad gayly in
yellow buckskin leggings, a checked
shirt that he wore outside of tnem,
and a battered old straw hat, once
black, that he carried on his head as
proudly as kings in pictures wear their
crowns. With becoming dignity he
sounded a long roll upon his drum, the
signal for the race to begin. Long before
he had finished two lads, the youngest
of the racers, had started out together,
and on an easy lope came down the
course, while the three or four thou
sand spectators sent up a ringing yell
As the boys arrived at the goal, two
men started out, not together, but as far
apart as the boys were when they came
in. This was rather puzzling, but after
a little investigation the principle of
the race was clear. The two sides were
divided, each into couples, one man of
each pair being at each end of the track
As a runner came in, his partner at once
started out, while the partner of the
man who lost the heat had to start, as
far in the rear as the distance by which
the heat'had been lost. Tho final vic
tory rested with the side whose man
came in first on the final heat.
One advantage of this arrangement,
so far as the spectators were concerned.
nas that the race was going on all the
time; and as the mau behind frequently
overtook and passed the man who bad
started out ahead, victory constantly
trembled in the balance, and from start
to finish the excitement was kept at
fever heat. For the most part the run
ning was magnificent, the lithe for inl
and vigorous muscles coming out
grandly under the spur of emulation
and the encouraging shouts of the
crowd. Indeed, the encouragement was
rather overwhelming, vigorous parti
sans breaking through the line of guards
and coming close to the runners to
shout 144 Aca!" 44 Aca !" 44 Our side!'
"Our side!" The scene along the
course, meanwhile, was as picturesque as
it well could be. Pressing close upon
each side over its entire length was the
brightly-dressed crowd of Indians and
Mexicans.on foot aud on horseback, bril
liant scarlet blankets and white robes
giving the high lights, while softer col
ors shone in tlie shawls and wraps of
the Mexican women, and so graded off
into the warm browns of the
ground and of tbe clay houses
to the black sombreros of the men.
Higher up, along the roofs of the houses,
the same color effect was repeated against
the brilliantly clear blue sky. And down
the wide lane, traversing the crowd from
end to end, the magnificent fellows
went tearing along as hard as possible.
It was a barbaric rendering of the
Olympian games.
But human nature, even Indian human
nature, cannot stand such tough work
as the runners accomplished for long at
a time, and in a trifle more thau an
hour the racing came to an end; but
whether it was the peace or the war
party that was victorious ever will re
main to me a mystery. That the result
was unsatisfactory to somebody is cer
tain, for after the race there was a pleas
ant little impromptu fight between
Indians and Mexicans out ou the plain.
Philadelphia Times.
The Age or the Earth.
Richard A. Trot-tor says that the age
of the earth is placed by some at 600
000,000 years ; and still others of later
time, among them the Duke of Argyll,
places it at 10,000,000 years. None
place it lower than 10,000,000, knowing
what processes have been gone thro jgh.
Other planets go through the same pro
cess. The reason that other planets dif
fer so much from the earth is that they
are in a so much earlier or later stage of
existence. Tho earth must have bo
come old. Newton surmised, although
he could give no reason for it, that the
earth would at one time lose all its
water and become perfectly dry. Since
then it has beeu found that Newton was
correct. As the earth keeps cooling it
will become porous, and great cavities
will be formed in the interior which
will take in the water. It is estimated
that this process is now in progress so
far that the water diminishes at about
tho rate of the thickness of a sheet of
writing paper a year. At this rate in
9,000,000 years the water will have sunk
a mile, aud in 15,000,000 years every
trace of water will have disappeared from
the face of the globe. The nitrogen and
oxygen in the atmosphere are also di
iniiii.sbiiig all the time. It is au iuup
pr -ciuble degree, but the time illcuiu
when the air will be so thin that no
creature we know could breathe it and
live; the time willconio when the world
capnot support life. That will be the
period of tld age, and then will coiue
death.
The Dark and the Dawn.
Tho glow against the western skyj
Has faded into tender gray;
The breezes in their fitf.il sigh
Betoken soon the end of day,
The shadows creep from vale to hill,
The chill mist settles o'er the river;
The things the day brought now are still
The birdlinga in the night air shiver.
From out the woodland's darkling glade
Two figures take their silent Way;
Across their path has come no sh do,
The world to them is fair and gay.
The paling light that wraps tho earth
Ia more to them than bright adorning;
But marks the token of the birth,
Tbe dawning of love's fairest morning.
HUM OR OF THE DJ.T.
The fly that walks on oleomargarine
is not the butterfly. Picyuns.
Melinda wants' to know the . exact
length of a lumber ywrd. Philadelphia
Sun.
It is a mist ak to assume that a rose
by any other name would smell as
wheat. Yonkers Gazelle.
War history: 44 What is the greatest
charge on record?" asked the professor
of history. And the absent-minded
student answered: 44 Seventeen dollars
for hack hire for self and girl for two
hours."
44 lam wafting, my darling, for thee,"
ho warbled; and yet when the old man
threw up a chamber window and assured
him that 44 he'd be down in a minute,"
he lost his grip on the melody and went
out of the waiting business.
How is this for a three-year-old? An
old man was passing the house Sunday,
taking exceedingly short- Steps. The
little one looked at him for several
minutes ana men cnea oni; iuhluluh,
don't he walk stingy?'' Spritnjfiid
Union,
Younsr lady (to her old nncls): "Oh,
uncle, what a shocking thing ! A young
girl was made crazy by a sudden kiss!"
Old uncle: 44 What did the fool go
crazy for?" Young lady: "What did
she go crazy for? Why for more, I
suppose."
If you want to get the reputation of
knowing a heap do as Professor Proctor
does. He KUesses what happened three
or four million years ao, and predicts
what is to happen fifteen million years
hence. It is only a few years since he
commenced, and now he cau get creait
at anv crocer7. Detroit Free Prax.
The Examiner and Chronicle says a
cup of water in the oven while baking
will prevent bread and cakes from burn
ing. Thanks for the information. And
a ten-year-old boy, loose in the cellar,
will prevent apples from spoiling.
About one boy to four barrels of apples,
doctor. Hawkeye.
A Syracuse girl broke off her engage
ment because her lover joined a base
ball club. She felt that she would
never be happy with a man who had
six fingers and his nose broken, and
four teeth knocked out, and who was
liable to dream that he was batting tor
a home run and knock her clear across
the room.
It was not sickness: 44 When we are
married, Lucy," said the poor man's ton
to the rich man's daughter, 44 our
honeymoon 3hall be passed abroad. We
will drive in the Rois, promenade the
Prada, gaze down into the blue waters
of the Adriatic from the Rialto, and en
joy the Neapolitan sunsets, strolling
Alnnir the Chiaia " 44 How delicious."
she murmured, 44 but, John, dear, have
you money enough to do all this, for
pa says I musn't expect anything until
he dies." John's countenance underwent
such a change that she couldn't help
asking him if he felt sick. 44 No, dar
ling," he answered, faintly, 4'I am not
sick. I was only thinking that perhaps we
had better postpone the marriage until
after the funeral." W ,. Bwjle.
Novel Device In Mmu'linif.
A novel device in smuggling has re
cently come to the notice of Colonel
Alexander, the fifth auditor of the treas
ury. Sometime ago a vessel laden with
lumber somewhere in Texas was dis
patched to one of the Mexican ports,
but for some reason she could not
make her destination, and discharged
her cargo upon the beach some sixteen
miles distant. After a time the Amer
ican consul or somd one acting for him,
evidently not well informed of the af
fairs of the vessel's owners, sold the
lumber on their account, and sent the
money to the treasury department.
The lumber was sent by its purchas
ers to a sawmill, and the first log was
placed in position to be cut into boards.
The saw had penetrated only a few
inches when there began to appear upon
its teeth shreda.of clothing and finally
it became fast and refused to move
further. Investigation disclosed the
fact that the log had been made hollow
by boring, and had been filU.d whh
clothing and other dutiable material,
and then plugged tip. The vessel was
seized by the Mexican government, but
being wortueateu and worthless was
abandoned.
The way of publishing a work in an
cient Rome waa this: The author placed
a copy of it into the hands of the tran
scribers, called libraii, who wrote out
the required number of copies, 'lliei-e
tranncribers, who were equivalent to
modern printers, passed the copies ov-r
to certain artists, called libraiaioli, who
ornamented them with fanciful titles,,
margins and termiuat ions.
ai llllt'Q Cl muiuau
ver. C1., und three more are soo"iu o.
added.
(i m 1 .1 .. iitttur bill '