The Forest Republican. (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, May 24, 1876, Image 1

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"W. 3. DUNN.
Fricis if Ronrusoii bokner-s Bummra
ELM BTRELT, TKME3TA, PA.
TKIIMS.J2.CK) A YF.AH.
Tto Subscriptions received for shorter
ported than throe ninnlh.
Correspondence solicited from nil parts
or tho onunlry. No notice will bo taken of
annoiiyinous communications.
BUSINESS DIRECTORY.
TIONESTA LODGE
So. SOU, f
I. O. of O. 3T-.
MEKrs every Frldav evening, at 7
o'clock, In tli Hull lormorlvooeuplod
tj Hie Good Templars.
O. W. SAWYER, N. O.
8. H. HASLET, Seo'y. 27-tf.
A TIONESTA COUNCIL, NO. 342,
O. TJ. 1A.. IMI.
MEETS nt O.M Follows' Ixxlo Room,
every Tuesday evening, nt 7 o'clock.
P. M. CLAUK, C.
. A. VAUNER, It. 8. 31
1H. WM. VOGEL,
OFFICKo pponlte Lawrence House, Tlo
nesta, Pa., where ho can bo found nt
II times when not professionally absent.
ao ly
in. j. a. blaixe,
OFFICE and ronldcnoo In house former
ly occupied Dr. Wlnans. Office dsys,
Wednesdays and Saturdays. S2tf
J. B. AONEW, . W. E. LATHY,
TloaMta, Fa. Erts, Fa.
AOjNIOYT LATHY,
Attorneys at Law, - Tlonesta, Pa.
Ofnoeon Elm Stroot.
May Id, 1ST5.-U
K. L. Davis,
ATTORNEY AT LAW. Tlonosta, Pa.
Collections made in this and adjoin
ing aountlM. 40-ly
MILKH W. TATK,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
Ir(, TIONESTA, PA,
T. W.Hayi,
ATTOUNRY AT LAW, and XoTnv
Fublio, Reynolds Uukill A ('o.'a
fcloek, Meaeoa Wt., Oil Uity, Pa. SO-ly
0. IrMfKBAR, V. B. BMIUiT.
': KISXEJ X X BMILKY,
AttwuTi at Latr, - Fraaklin, Pa.
PRACTICR In the sovornl Courts of Ve
nango, Crawford, Foroat, and adjoia
fm eoanUra. .'It'-ly.
HATIOXAI, 1IOTJEI,,
VT, D. BUCKLIN, - pBormsTou.
Frlst-Claaa Licensed House. Good ata
tds eonnocted. 1.1-ly
Tioncsta Mouse,
ANDREW WKLLKK, "Proprietor. This
hnase has bcon newly rlltod up and is
now open for tho accommodation of the
)allx Charge reasonable. 34 ly
CENTRAL HOUSE,
BONNER AONEW BLOCK. L.
AON rw. Proprietor. This is a new
aoase, and has just boon fitted up for the
aeeetamodatiou of the public. A portion
f tke patronage of tho publics U solid toil.
a-ly
Lawren.cs House,
TIONESTA, PA., WILLIAM LAW
ItEMCE. Proprirtou. This housn
la eontrall v located. Everything now and
well furnished Superior accommoda
tions and strict attention gi von to guests.
Vegetables and Fruits of all kiiifls sorvod
-in their season. Samplo room for Ooin
meroial Agents.
rOI.EST HOUSE,
SA. VARNER PnorniKTon. Opposlto
Court House, Tlonesta, Pa. Just
openod. Everything now and cloun and
fresh. The best of liquors kept constantly
m Land. A portion of tho public patron
age is respectfully solicited. . 4-17-lV
W. C. COQURN, mTd., '
PTIYSICIAN A SUROEOX offers Iris
services to the poopla of Forest Co.
Having had an experience of Twelve
"Years In constant practice, Dr. Coburn
guarantees to five satisfaction. Dr. Co
fcnrn makes a specialty of the treatment
tt Nasal, Throat, Lung and all other
Chronio or lingering diseases. Having
Investigated all aeientiflc methods of cur
ing diseaso anil selected tho good from nil
systems, he will guarantee relief or a cure
In all cases whore a cure is possible. No
Charge for Consultation. All fees will bo
reasonable. Professional visits mado nt
all hours. Parties al a distanco can con
milt him bv letter.
Office and Residence second building
Iwlow tho Court House, Tioncsta, l'a. of
fice days Wednesdays and Saturdays. 2Mf
Dr. J. L. Acornb,
PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON, who ha
had fifteen years' experience in a lariie
.and successful practico, will attend all
Professional Cults. Olllco in his Drill and
Jtlrooery fttoro, locatod in Tidiouto, near
Tidioute House.
IN HIS STORE WILL BE FOUND
A full assortment of Medicines, Liquors
Tobacco, Cigars, Htatlotiorv, Glass, Paints,
(OiU. Cutlery, all of tho boat quality, and
will b said at re&souablo rates.
DR. t'HAS. O. DAY, nn experienced
Physician and Druggist from New York,
fta charge of the Store. All prescriptions
fiut up accurately.
p a. M4T. J to. r. nt. kki.lt.
MA Y, FA UK CO.,
B A K E B S
Corner of Elin'A Walnut Sts. Tlonesta.
B:uik of Disouunt and Deposit.
JuUasst allowed on Timo Deposits.
oVHiuis wadeonall the Principal points
of Mio V. S.
Colleotlons solicited. 18-ly.
IJF.LT CARPETIVGS, Ji "U. per yard.
FELT CKI LIN'ti for rooms in plae.i ol
Plaster. FFLT KOOFIN an I Si !I N'f '
For samples, address C. J. FAY, Ciim ten,
New Jtrisey.
VOL. IX. NO. 8.
Paintfng, Paper-Hanging Ac,
1 II. CHASE, of Tlonosta, offora Ms
services to those In nood of
PAINTING,
UKAININO,
C'ALC
H
VVATtNrSHING,
i vviti nnu,
PAPKK i. iNGINU.
AND CARRIAGE WOKK,
Work promptly attended to and
Hiitifftotlon Ouaranteod.
Mr. Chaso will work In tho country
when desired. 13-tf.
WILLIAMS f, CO.,
MEADVILLK, . - PENN'A.,
TAXIDERM I 8TS .
CIRD3 and Animals stuffed and mount
ed to order. Artificial Eyes kept in
stock. 2-iy
JtlllH. V. SI. III2ATII,
DRESSMAKER, Tionesta, Pa.
MRS. HEATH Iiai recently moved to
this place for the purposo of mooting
a want which the lndios of the town and
county have for a long time known, that
of having a dressmaker of exporionee
among them. Iam pranared to make all
kinds of dresses in the latest stvles, and
guarantee satisfaction. Stamping' for braid
ing nnd embroidery done In tho best man
ner, witli tho newest patterns. All I ask
is a lair trial. Residence on Water Street,
In the house fonnorly ocoupied by Jacob
.Shrivor. Htf
TIME TRIED AND FIRE TESTED !
tub ontniNAt.
ETNA INSURANCE COMPANY
OF HARTFORD, CONN.
ASSETS Dec. 31, 1873, "
w n , y n n , t a n . o.
MILES W. TATE, Sub Agent,
5 Tonosta, Pa,
, - Frank Ilobbius,
PHOTOGRAPHER,
' (SUCCESSOR TO DJCItlNO.)
Plolurea In every styleof the art. Views
of tho oil regions for sulo or taken to or
der. '
CENTRE STREET, noar II, R. crossing.
KYCAMORE STREET, near Union Do
pat, Oil City, Pa. ao-tf
PHOTOGRAPH GALLERY.
KLM MTUKKT,
SOUTH OF IIORIXSON A P.ONNER'S
STOHli.
Tionesta, Pa.,
H. CARPENTER, . . . Proprietor.
Pictures taken In all the latest styles
the art. af-tr
I NIf.il.I, ATTKXI
TO MY
Business as Usual !
L. KLEIN,
(In G. W. Ilovard's Store, Tioncsta, Pa.)
PBACTI0A1,
WATCHMAKER & JEWELER,
DEALER IN
Watches, Clocks, Solid ami l'latcd
Jewelry, lilack Jewelry.
Eye Glasses, Spec
tacles, Violin Strings, f c, Vc,
Particular attention given to
Repairing Fine Watches.
NEBRASKAGRIST MILL.
THE GRIST MILL at Nebraska (Lacy
town,) Forest couuty, has been thor
oughly overhauled and retltted In first
class order, and is now running and doing
all kinds of
OUKTO Ji GKIXDINC.
FLOUR,
FEED, v AND OATS.
ConstMiitly on hand, und sold at tho very
lowest liirures.
VMini -II. W. LEDEIIL'R.
(ft A
9 1
T10NEST.A, PA.,
A REPORTER'S STORY.
I Lad been stopping for a short timo
iu the city of Jackson, Michigan, eu-gn-red
in the capacity of a traveling
reporter for one of the New York
journals, when one rainy, disagreeable
day, I resolved to visit the State's
prison, in search of some items of in
teresting news. I did so.
After having passed through the en
tire establishment, I was nt last shown
into the cell of a young man doomed
to suffer death.
The occupant of this cell wag a fine.
sad, intelligent-looking persanaga of
about twenty-three year of age. His
high, classical forehead, deep bluo
yes, and noblo polite bearing, indi
cated him to be no common villain.
His face was thiu and pallid, but from
those pure, expressive eyes flashed a
depth of character, an unendurable
sorrow, a soul destroying rotnorso,
which no cold-blooded murderer could
possess.
At his first words, "Pray, be sealed,"
I was surprised at the deep, full, musi
cal intonations oi hia voice. It at once
proclaimed him a scholar.
I soon entered into a long conversa
tion with him, and littlo by, little
learned the following sad but truthful
talo, which I give, as nearly as possi
ble, in his own language, and which I
hope will prove a warning to the
many weary, foolhardy thousands who
are swiftly drifting into that fearful,
whirling, domestic vortex jealousy.
My name is George Melville. My
father was a clergyman in the western
part of this state, and descended from
one of the best furuiliea in those parts.
I received a good education, and at
the age of twenty entered a large mer
cantile house in New York city. I
soon, by close application and indefa
tigable energy, gained the entire con
fidence of my employers; and after
having been in their service one year,
I was selected by them to visit the
West Indies as their agent on some
business of importance, and which
would require considerable tact and
forethought to execute faithfully and
promptly transact.
Previous to ray departure for those
islauds I beenmo acquainted with a
Miss Reynolds, who was a few years
younger than myself, and the daugh
ter of a gentleman who had recently
purchased and removed to an estate
near my father's. .
Everything that was graceful and
lovely appeared centered in her form ;
everything that was virtuous and ex
cellent iu her mind. I sought her
haud.f Our souls soon became unite. I
by the indissoluble bonds of sincere
love; and as there were no parental or
other impediments to our union, it was
agreed that as soon ns I returned from
the West Indies, whero it was expected
my stay would bo short, the marriage
solemnities would be performed. Sol
emn oaths of love and constancy pass
ed between us, and I sailed with a
light heart for the West Indies. While
there I received from her, and return
ed to her, letters filled with the ten
derest expressions of anxiety aud re
gret of absence. Oh, that 1 had nev
er, never returned 1 What pain, an
guish aud remorse I would have been
saved I
The moment I got on land I hasten
ed as fust as the railway train could
carry me to the house of Mr. Reynolds,
to see the charmer of my soul.
She received me with all the arden
cy of affection, and even shed tears of
joy id ray presence. I urged her to
name the day which wag to perfect
our union and happiness; and the next
Sunday, four days ouly distant, was
a creed upon, for me to lead her to the
altar, How did my heart bound at
the prospoct of making Miss Reynolds
my owa, of possessing in her all that
could render life agreeable!
I hastened home to my family, and
informed them of my approaching
bliss. They all sympathized in the
anticipated joys which swelled my bo
som. I had a sister some years older
than myself, who had been the friend
and companion of my angel in my
absence. They were now almost every
day together, so that I had frequent
opportunities of Emma's company.
Ono day she had been with my sister,
at my father's ; and, as usual, I ac
companied her home. On my return
my sister requested me to attend her
in a private room. We therefore re-,
tired, arid when we were seated she
thus addressed me:
"George, you know that to promote
your peace, your welfare, and your
happiness has ever been the pride of
my heart. Nothing except this could
extort the sad secret which I now dis
close, and which has hitherto remain
ed deposited in my own bosom. My
duty to a brother, whom I esteem dear
as life, forbids me to remain silent.
As an alicctionatOavsidter, I cannot
tacitly see you thus imposed upon. I
canuot see you the dupe and slave of
an artful and insiduous woman, who
does uot sincerely return your lovo;
V
MAY 21, 187G.
nor can I see your marriage celebrated
with one whose soul and n (lections are
placed on another object."
Here she hesitated, while I, with an
guish of mind, almost insufferable,
begged her to proceed.
"About six or eight months after
your departure," she continued, "it
was' reported to Miss Reynolds that
she had a rival in the West Indies;
that you had there found an English
be.iuty on wlrom you lavished those
endearments which belonged of right
to her alone. This nt first made a
deep impression on her ; and whether
from this cause, from fickleness of dis
position,, or that she never sincerely
loved y ju, I know not ; but this I do
know, that a youth has been for some
time past her constant companion. Je
convince you of this, you need only
visit the old, uninhabited house bor
dering on the river, about nine or ten
this evening, when you will undoubt
edly surprise Miss Reynolds and her
lover, enjoying one of their pleasant,
loving interviews. If I should be mis
taken, I will submit to your censure;
but should you find it as I have pre
dicted, you have only to rush from
your placo of concealment, charge her
with perfidy, and renounce her for
fever" Of all the plagues, of all tho tor
ments, of 'all the curses which torture
the soul, jealousy of a rival in lovo is
tho worst.
Enraged, confounded, and astonish
ed, it seemed as if my bosom would
instantaneously burst. To conceal uiy
emotions, I left my sister's apartments,
after having thanked her for her in
formation, and proceeded to obey her
injunctions. I retired to my room,
and there poured out my execrations.
"Cursed woman 1" I cried "is it thus
you requite my tender lovef Could
u vague report of my inconstancy
drive you to infidelity ? Did not ray
letters breathe constant adoration, and
did not yours portray the same sinceri
ty of affection? No; it was that
wretched passion for novelty which
more or less holds a predominancy
over your whole sex. To a new lover
you will sacrifice your most sacred
engagements, though mado in the face
of heaven !"
Thus did I rave through the entire
day. The proceedings of that day are
a vacuum in my memory. Every fiend
in Hades was polluting its seared, bony
fingers at me, and, with derisive, sneer
ing laughter, and sarcastic tones,
were ur jing mo on to "revenge."
Through tho whole of that day I
was a raviusr, frantic maniac. I was
hopelessly and incurably a victim of
that worst ot all passions, jealousy.
Slowly the day wore away. At last
the sun went down. Better for me
had iteen possible for that bright
orb to have remained immovable for
all time.
It was a beautiful summer sunset.
The fust receding rays, us they lingo r-
ingly res'.ed upon the topmost crest of
the distant mountain, engulluig its
base in a pall-like gloom, and slant
ingly beamed upon the daueing, shim
mering waves of the silent river, threw
back a mixture of shade and sun
shine which plainly told that night
was approaching. Night, oh, fatal
night!
All nature was clothed in its most
pleasant garb. Tho caroling of the
birds, tho purling rivulets, grand old
forests, majestic river and twinkling
stars were all lovely.
But in the midst of this soul en
chanting scenery appeared a cloud, a
mere speck at first, but which rapidly
increased. Bright sheets id' lightning
began to flash aloug the darkening
heavens; and the low rumbling dis
tant thunder, resembling the karsh
growling of ferocious beasts, announ
ced the coming storm. Larger and
larger grew the clouds j louder and
louder pealed the thunder, while the
lightning fairly flooded tho gloomy
heavens with a stream of electric
light.
And there I sat in my room occa
sionally giving vent to outbursts of
demoniacal laughter. Black and ter
rible as was the scene without, it wng
nothing to the Btorm of raging pass
ions that were howling in my breast.
The storm continued. A leep, hollow,
distant roar auuouuced the approach
of summoned winds. The wholo fur-e.-t
bowed in awful grandeur, a from
its dark bosom rushed the impeteus
hurricane, twisting oft" or tearing up
by tho roots the stoutest trees, and
whirling the heaviest branches through
the air with irresistible fury.
Deep night now filled the atmos
phere. The raiu poured in torrents;
the wind rocked the building, and bel
lowed in the adjacent groves; the
river raged and roared ; fierce light
nings rent the heavens alternately,
involving the world in the sheeted
flame of its many colored fires; thun
ders burst with horrid diu, bounding
aud reverberating among the sur
rounding woods, hills aud valleys,
until it eemed nothing less than the
crash of worlds resouuding thromdi
$2 VEll ANNUM.
the-universe. Tho whole scene was
majestically grand.
I lie clock struck the hour often. I
sprang from my seat and rushed into
the street. The "trysting hour" had
conic, but the storm without had made
me oblivious to the hell within. The
scenes, externally and internally, were
wen-iuung 10 me dibck nna damnins;
uueu x was mai nignr destined to per
form.
I was alone in the street. Not one
ot the harpy inhabitants of that town
dared venture out on such an eve
ning as mat. jn l went, with a
burning fever consuming my inmost
soul. Ou and on, unmindful of the
terrible aspect of the raging elements.
The boiling, seething, turbuletit river,
as it flowed angrily on, the howling
winds; the lurid lightning, the loud
bolts of thunder, were uncared for and
unheeded by me. 1 arrived in view
of the old house bv the. river sid T
looked all was dark, silent and
gloomy. 1 closed my eyes, clenched
my hands, and swore by the black
i i . -
iieavens auovo mo to oe avenged.
; I opened my eyes, and a bright, lu
rid fantastic lieht was streaming fiom
ODe of the lower windows Tho lio-hf
at first was so dazzlingiy brilliant
mat ii, aimosi uuncicu nio. l crept
steaillii v un nearer to the wmr nm
j i -- ,
and there witnessed a scene which
paralyzed every fiber in my organiza
tion, and causod evcrv dron of blood
to congeal in my veins. I saw Miss
Reynolds closely locked in the arms
of a young man elegantly dressed, aud
of singularly delicate" appearance.
They were earnestly conversing in a
low tone of voice, and the hand of my
fair one was gently pressed in the
hands of the stranger. I drew close
to the window, applied my eaT to a
crevice, and, with tho fury of pande
monium in my heart, I listened.
The stranger clasped Miss Rey
nolds in his arms.
"Dearest angcll" he exclaimed,
'what an interruption to our bliss by
tho retum of my hated rival."
With very fond caresses and en
dearing blandishments, she replied,
' Fear nothing. I have promised, and
must yield him my hand; but you
shall never be excluded from my
heart. We shall fiud sufficient oppor
tunities for private conference."
I could here no moro. My braiu
was on fire; and, rushing from my
concealment, I, with a bouud sprang
through the window and confronted
them.
"Ungrateful and false-hearted wom
an!" I exclaimed. "Is it thus you
return my idolatrous love? You have
deserted me. You have perjured
your most sacred vows; aud thus am
I avenged !" and plncing a pistol at
her breast, I shot her through the
heart; and turning to her companion
"And thou, perfidious contamina
tor and destroyer of my bliss, go at
tend thy1 companion in iniquity, a
death too good for so foul a crime!"
and immediately drawing my knifo, I
stabbed him to the hilt in the breast.
With the words, "Oh,. Gsorge!
Your wife, your sister !" he fell faint
ing to th a floor.
My God 1 That voice! It rang in
my car like a funeral knell ! It rings
to-day, aud will continue to ring a
requiem of agonizing remorse as long
as time shall last.
It was indeed my betrothed wife ;
it was indeed, my belovl sister.
The one lay dead before me, tho other
weltering iu ber blood.
I raisad my sister's head into my
Inn. In a faint and dying voice she
told me that iu a weak moment they
bad concerted this plan to test my
jealousy, blie had uesscd in male
uiure, inicnaing as soon as i nan un
covered them, to reveal herself,-and
laugh at my discomfiture.
"Forgive me, George," she pleaded,
earnestly; "forgive me! A mad un
womanly freak hns robbed me of the
happiness of a lifetime."
Sho said no more, for, with her
arms cutwined loviugly around her
murderer's neck, she, without a strug
gle, was wafted on angel's wings to
her Creator. What words can des
cribo such agony, such utter desola
tion as mine ! I5y one rash act I had
robbed myself of moro than life, and
I would not live to endure such bitter
remorse as mino. I placed my pistol
to my head, but ere I could fire, my
arm was grasped by a hand of steel,
and tho weapon dashed upon tho
ground.
My tiring liad awakened tlioso Iiv
lug close by, and they came just in
timo to save me the crime of a triple
murder.
I made no resistenco', and was con
veyed to prison, there to await my
triul, which cuuio off in two mouths.
I was condemned to death. My exe
cution will take place in tour weeks
train to-morrow, 1 shall clicerlully
meet my i'ato, fur who would endure
life wheu rendered so peculiarly mis
cjjable? The wretched Melville here ended
his tale of vroc. No tears moistened
Ratc3 of Advertising.
OnoHqnaroU inch,) ono Inortjon - fl 50
Ono Square " ono mouth - 3 00
One Square " threo months - 6 00
One Square " ono year - - JO 00
Two Squares, ono year - 15 On
Quarter Col. - . . . jm 00
Half " ... .3000
Ona " " - - - . 160 00
Legal nnlicesat established ratco.
Marriage nnd drath notices, gratis.
All Mils for yearly advertisements enl.
loctod quarterly. Tcmporarv advertise
ments must he paid for in advance.
.lul. t,.i:.,.
" ' - IVlll vll UUIOC1J,
hia eyes; his grief was to despairing
for tears; it preyed upon his heart,
drank the vital streams of his lifo;
and burst in convulsive sighs from
his burning bosom.
The day appointed for his execu
tion drew near; his past and approach
ing fate filled his breast with sympa
thetic sorrow.
lie saw his venerable father, his
mother, his friends aud acquaintan
ce.', with several pious clergymen, who
entered his cell to comfort" him. His
miud softened by their advice and
counsel. Frequently would he burst
into tears. Ot'teu in th solitary hour
of tho night was ho hoard addressing
the Throne of Graco for mercy and
forgiveness.
But the grief that preyed at his
heart had wasted him to a mere skele
ton. A slow but fatal fever had con
sequently implanted itself in his con.
stitution. Exhausted naturo could
make but a weak struggle against dis
ease and aUliction like his ; and about
a week previous to the day appointed
for his execution he expired in his
mother's arms, aitli the 'name, of his
loved and lost one upon his lips
leaving a conclusive, incontrovertible
evidence of the evil influence of jeal.
ousy.
A men MAS ON KICIIK.q.
Tho following story, trnvs the Way
side, is told of Jacob Ridgcway, a
wealthy citizen of Philadelphia, who
died many years ago, leaving a for
tune of five or six million dollars:
"Mr. Ridgeway," said a young man,
with whom tho millionaire was con
versing, "you are to ho moro envied
than any gentleman I know."
"Why so?" responded Mr. Ridge
way. "I am not aware of any cuso
for which I should ho particularly en
vied." '"What, sir?" exclaimed tho young
man in astonishment. "Why, are
you jjot a millionaire? Think of the
thousands your income brings you
everv month !"
"Well, what of that ?" replied Mr.
R. "All I get out of it is my victuals
and clothes, and I can't eat moro than
ono man's allowance or wear more
than one suit at the same time. Tray
can't you do as much?"
"Ah, but," eaid tho youth, "thiukof
tho hundreds of fino houses you own
and the rental they bring vou."
"What better am I off for that?"
replied tho rich man. "I can only
live in one house at a time; as for tho
money 1 reccivo tor rents, why. I can't
eat it or wear it ; I can only us it to
buy othor houses tor others to live iu.
They are the beneficiaries, not I."
"But you can buy costly furnituro
and costly pictures, and fine carriages
and horses ; in fact, anything you de
sire." "And after I have bought them,"
responded Mr. R., "what then? I can
only look at tho furniture and pictures
and tho poorest man who is not
blind cau do the same. I can ride no
easier in a fice carriage than you can
in an onunibus tor live cents, with tha
troublo of atteuding to drivers, foot
men and hostlers; and as to anything
I desire, I tell you young roan that the
less we desire in this world the hap
pier we shall be. All my wealth can
not buy mo a single day more ' of life.
and can not purchase exemption from
sickness and pain it cannot procure,
me power to keep afar off the hour of
death; and what will it avail when in
a few short years at most I lie down in
the grave and leave it all forever?
Young man, you have no cause to en.
vy me."
Tho other day a Detroiter who has
a good record of army scrvico took
down his revolver to shoot a cat which
had been hanging about the house.
After lookiug at liim whilo he fired
six shots, tho cat walked away. Whilo
he was loading up for more destruc
tion, tho shooter's son inquired, "Fa
ther, did vou ever kill any ono while
you were iu the army?" "I suppose
so, my son. Alter a long pause the
boy continued, "lhen you must have
got near enough to hit 'cm with an
axe, didn't jou?" It was then discov
ered to bo about school timo.
As a boy was going down a street
in Boston, a woman opened the front
door of a house aud called, "John,
John, John!" As the boy paid no
attention to the calls, a pedestrian
said to him, "Here boy, your mother
is calling you. "No she is u t, re
plied the lad, as he turned the corner,
'Vhe's only my lather's second wif's
and I want her to understand that sho
can't ron me."
An absent-minded editor having
courted a girl and applied to her la
ther, the old man suiil : "Well, you'
want my daughter ; what sort of set
tlement will you make? What will
you give her?" 'jGivo l.er," replied
the other, loekiug up vacantly ; "Oh,
I'll give her a puff." "Take her," re.
plied the I'atUr.