4
is rurn.isiiEn every Wednesday, by
W. If. DUNN..
rnoB in nnivnm n.iNNm'a euilbiho
r.T.M PTKKirr, tiont-sta, fa.
TKltMS, S2.h0 A YEAR.
No Subscriptions received for n shorter
p I'Hl 11)1111 UlleO lllolllilH.
Correspondence solicited from nil rmits
nf Ihn country. Nn notice will betaken of
nn lion vnn his communications.
BUSINESS DIRECTORY.
vol. viii. no. 33.
TIONESTA, PA., NOVEMBER 21,' 1875.
$2 PEK-ANNUM.
TI0NF,3TA LODGE
yo. :to:,
O.ofO. V
MEETS every Friday evening, nt 7
o'clock, i.i tli" Hull lormcrly occupied
V till' Ullllll ICIliplMI'S.
(i.W.RAWVKll.X.fi,
N. If. HASLET, Si ()' v. Ii7-tf.
vnTHMTcTiA rrumnrr wn Oto
O. IT. A.. M.
MEETS nt Odil Fellows' Lodge Jtoom,
every Tuesday evening, t 7 o'clock.
U. V. SAWYER. C.
K. C. JOHNSON. It. S. 81.
Painting, Paper-Hanging Stc,
I? II. CHASE, of'lionosla, offers hi
J ser"ieos to those In need of
PAINTING.
C.RAINIXO.
CALCIMTNINO,
SIINI A- VARNISHING,
SKIN WHITING,
PAPER HANGING.
AND CARRIAGE WORK,
Work promptly nttenilotl to ami
Hn i lnCi'i Ion 0iiiii-mit'Ml.
Mr. Chase will work In
when desired.
tho -ountry
III II. .
ji:..r. :. jilaime,
Of-
"VFFlCF. at dipt. Knox's residence.
V J l,'.o davs. Wednesday uiul Satur
days. VM
J
B. ACNFW, W. E. LATHY,
TlooenU, Pb. Erlf, Pa.
Attorneys nt Law, - Tlonc3t.i, Pa.
v Oflleo on Elm Streot.
May IB, ISTi.-tf
E. L. Davis,
K TTORNEY AT LAW, Tinimsta, Pa.
V. Collections mudo In tills and adjoin
ing counties. I01y
MILKH Y. rr ;V T I J ,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
Im Hirer), TIOXKSTA, r.t.
F. W. Hay5,
TTORNEY AT LAW, and Notary
J Pi' ni.ii!. Reynold Hukill A Co.
Block, Seneca St., Oil City, Pa. -3-ly
W. C. COBURN, M. D.,
"PHYSICIAN SURGEON oilers his
L services to tlio people of Forest Co,
Having had an expci -fence of Twelve
Years in constant practice, Dr. Coburn
guarantees to give satisfaction. Dr. Co
burn makes a specialty of tlio treatment
of Natal, Tlirimt, Lung and all other
Chronic or lingering diseases. Having
investigated all Hi'leiiiltio methods ot cur
inii diacaso and sclrctod tlio irxd from all
system, lip will Riianmtoo relief or a cure
in nil rains where a cure is possible. Hi)
I'hai iro for Consultation. All fees will be
reasonable. Professional visita made nt
nil hours. Parties aln distance can con
sult hliu by letter.
Ollii'0 nnd Hesidence 1st door cast of
Partridito's Now ltliK-k, foot of Dutch
Hill Itontl, Tlonesta, Pa. iKitl
M S. V. HI. 1IIMTII,
DRESSMAKER, Tioncsta, Pa.
K. D. SMILRT.
MNS'EAll C SSI I LEY,
Attorneys ai Law, - - - Fraaklln, P.
13UACTIOK In the several Conrts of Vo
ninwi. Crawford. Forest, and adloln-
tns oouutics. ai'-ly.
"it. C & Hi. v7 i.a wsoar,"
"OAUnF.IiS nnd Hairdressers. Hinrar
I) bauh building, Klin Kt. Switches,
Frlr.T.c. Druids. Curls. c.. mado from
('milium;, llnviivr settled pcrmnnciitly
In this place, thov dexiro the pntrnniuro of
11e public. Ka'.iMfurtio'i guaiante?l. l Sm
TIIDIOTJT.H3.. I? -A..
W. D. HUClvLIN, - Piioi-niKTon.
Frlst-CUiMS Licenced Housa. Ciood tita-
bla oounecled.
Mn4!. II RATH lini reeeiitlynoved to
this place for tho purposo' of nvctinp
a want which the ladies of the town and
county have for a lonir time known, that
of hnvlnu; a dressmaker of experience
anions them. I am prepared to make all
kinds of dresses In the latest styles, and
frunrnntce satisfaction. Stamping for braid
inn nnd embroidery done in the best man
ner, with tho newest pal torus. All I ask
is a tair trial. Residence on Water Street,
in tho hoase formerly occupied by Jacob
snriver. ii
Frank Itohbli:,
PHOTOGRAPHER
(HH'CKSSOR TO DEMINO.)
!!,,,.. l.t.va..lanrilmart Vinu
of tlio oil regions for sale or takonno or
Her.
CENTUK STUF.ET, noar n, n. cresslng,
SYCAMORE STREET, near Union Do-
p.it, uu city, ra. zu-ir
PHOTOGRAPH GALLERY
ELM HIltEUT,
SOUTH OF nORIXSOX & IJOXNEIVS
STOllK,
li-lv
CENTRAL HOUSE,
BONNER AONKW r.LOCIC. L.
Ami-. Proinietor. This Is a new
nuuse, and hasjiMt been fitted up for tho
aeroinmodatioii of tho public. A portion
f the patronage of tho public is soiieitod.
i-iy
Lawren.ce House,
yninXKSTA. PA.. WILLIAM LAW-
1 RF.NCK. PnorniKTon. This house
Is eenlrall v located. Everything now and
well furnished Superior accnm limita
tions and strict attention jiiven to uucsts.
Yeirelnblcs nnd Fruits of all kinds served
in their season. Sample room for Com
mercial AK''iit';-
Tioaesta,
M. CARPENTER, - -
Pa.,
. Proprietor.
Pictures taken in all tho latest styles
tho art.
20-tr
F0IKST HOUSE,
SA. VAltN'i:it Puovimvroit. Opposite
. I'jinrt lloiiso. Tioncsta, Pa. Just
..,., I ICvoi-vlhinir n.iw and clean and
fresh. Tho best of liipiors kept constantly
nn hand. A portion of the public putron-a-re
is rcsnoftiully solicited, 4-17-lV
C. B. Weber's Hotel,
TYLEKSKUHtlH.PA. C. n.WERER,
has possession of tho new brick hotel
and will lie Imppy to entertain all his old
customers, and a'nv numlier of now ones.
(Jood acconimodHtioiis for guests, and ex
eollonlHtabliiiK. I-a''
Dr. J. L. Acoirb,
PHYSICIAN AND KURfi F.ON, who has
bad liftcen years' experience in a largo
ond successful practice, will attend all
Professional Calls. Olllce in his Drug and
tlrooory Store, located in Tidiouto, near
Tidiou'te House. h.,
IN HIS STORE WILL HE FOUND
A full nssortineut of Medicines, Liquors
Tobacco, Cigars, Stationery, Ulass, Paints,
Oils, Cutlery, all of the host quality, and
will be sold at reasonable rates.
DR. CIIAS. O. DAY, an experienced
ti...i,.;iii uu. I Di'inriial from New York,
has charge of the SU.ro. All proscriptions
put up accurately.
H. H. MAY. NO. r. PARK. A. . RKLLK
MA Y, VAItK .CCO.,
J3 -A. -tsE K E B S
Comer of Kim t Walnut Sts. Tionesta.
Hank of Discount and Deposit.
Interost allowed on Timo Dciiosils.
CoHoetloiisniadoon all tho Principal points
. of the U. S.
Colloctions solicited. 1S-1V-
(In COVARD CO.'S Store, Tionosta, Ta.)
H
D. W. CLARK,
C0MMISSI0SEU'S CLBIIK, KORK9T CO., PA.)
MEAL ESTATE AGENT.
6USES nnd LoU for Salo and RENHH
Wild Lands for Sale. 'X
r aunnrlnr fncilitioH for ascertaining
the condition of taxes and tax deeds, Ac.,
and am thoroforo ipinlilictl to a.-t lntelli
uontlyas agent of thoso living at a dis
tance, owning lands in tho County.
Ollice in Commissioners Room, tourl
Hoiiserionest,,, Pa. (',x UK.
nOUBLEYOUIl TRADE".
, Jlu ii-. s and Dealers! Pure
hint and' Japan Teas m scaled package,
..miu Iiiiich or halt chests
i rowers' priiTH. Send lor ei.v.ilar '1 he
Wells Tea Company. -1 1-ulloil St.. -N.
y., p. o. ox i-i'io. H '"
PRACTICAL.
WATCHivUKER & JEWELER,
DEALER IN
Watches, Clock, Solid atul Mated
Jewelry, Mack JeiveJry.
Eye Vtasse, Spec
tacles, Violin Strings, AKc, f c.
Will examine and repair Fino EnKlish,
Swiss or American Watches, such as Re
peaters, Independent Seconds, Stem
Winders, Duplex, Levers, Anchors and
LopinoM, and will mako any new pieces
for the same, such as Stalls, Forks, Pol
lutls, Wheels, Pinions, Cylinders, Par
rels, Arbors, and in fact any part apper
taining to fine watches.
jV.11 "Vurlc Wnrrnnted.
I can safely
that anv work undertaken by me will be
done hi such a manner and at such prices
lor
HOOD WORK
that will give satisfaction to all who may
favor me witn their oruers.
L. KLEIN,
Hly Author of "Tho Watch."
NEBRASKA GRIST MILL.
rpil K GRIST MILL at Nebraska (Lacy
X towii,) Forest county, lias been thor
oniriiiv overhauled mid refitted in first'
class order, and is now running and doing
all kinds of
cuMTon cj m x u i ar g.
FLOUR.
FEED, AND OATS
Constuntlv on hand, and sold at tho very
lowest liglllcs.
4.j-oiu II. W. LEDKISL R.
TEE LOTTERY . TICKET.
There was a timo wlicn lotteries
were very cnmuinn things, quite lejrnl,
ind by no means oisrcputnbl?, anrl
when very wortliy people bought tick
ets fuii niufle no secret of the matter.
It was a pood while tigo, of course, nnd
you would have to look lor the elderly
gentleman who, ono night, nbout dark,
walked into n lottery olhco for the
purpose of buying a ticket, lie had
tight boots twill tight trowscrs with
straps. Tho fur collar of his coat
stood up above his cars ; and ho wore
that awful thing, a stock about his
throat. Ho ws in the .height of that
year's fashion, and was regarded by
those who met lum rather with admir
ation than v:th tho stare of astonish
ment with which we should greet him
now with which, iodced, wo should
greet any of tlio ladies or gentlemen
of that year. : The gentlemen, habited
as above, with curly, bell-Ehaped hats
upon their heads, and twisted canes in
their hands. The ladies in coul-scut-tlo
Ijpiiiicle and leg-of-mutton fleevcs;
and two straight breadths and two
gores in their skirts, which were short,
and showed the low slippers and silk
stockings; and with long-btttpgcd
work-bags on their arms, nnd big par
asols over the big bonnets, before
which hung curtaics of black or whito
lace which they called veils.
Mr. lingers for that was this gen
tleman's name stepped up to tho,'
counter, and asked to look at tickets.
Perhaps lie had tho superstition that
there was luck in odd numbers for,
as soon as they were spread before him,
be decided on number seven hundred
and seventy-seven, paid its price, and
walked oil with it in lus waistcoat
pocket. As ho turned the corner, the
poster on the wall seemed to be writ
ten especially for him "Tho capital
prize, two thousand pounds. Tickets,
one pound each. Don't delay 1"
"I had a dream tint mcni.t luck
last night," said Mr, lvogcrs to him
self; "and I've a fancy that I shall
draw the great prize. J hats a splen
did number !"
Then ho turned another corner, and
spied u face peeping out of the win
dow ot a small house the iaeo of
Mrs. Rogers, who feared Mr. Il.'a fa
vorite dish as spoiling.
"1 lint reminds nie, said Mr. ling
ers, "i uiustii t tell Js in era Id n. 1 tie
luck is spoilt if one tells of the ticket.
And she'd talk so much of it women
will talk so much !"
So Mr. Rogers drank his tea and
said nothing of his lottery ticket,
which he hid at the bottom of his
trunk a bulging, hair-covered thing,
with T. H. on the side in bvass nails.
But though he said nothing, his mind
was full of it. ., Ho thought of that
capital prize while he at his breakfast;
he dined oS' it; ho dreamt of it. Ho
was a school master; and while ruling
the boy's copy-books and setting copies
for them, he was so filled with the
idea that all tho boys v ho had reach
ed "P" had "Prize"" written for them,
and all the boys who had come to "D"
had "Draw, Drawn, Drawing," before
their eyes, while those 1n "T" copied
"Tick, Ticket Tick, Ticket," all tho
writing hours.
Little Mrs. Rogors, who was much
younger than her husband, saw that
something was on his .mind, but did
not dare to ask what it was. lie toss
ed aud turned in his sleep, and scrib
bled sevens on the newspapers, and on
backs of letters, and even wrote tho
roagio figure on his nails with a lead
nenuil. Aud once, in a moment of
excitement, caused by sombodv asking
the day of tho month, be said with
great fervor :
"Ah I I only wish it was the first of
next month !"
"Whv, dear?" asked Mrs. Rogers.
'Oh I" said Mr. Rodger J "it's
my birthday you know."
"Oh, yes? so it is," said Mrs. Rog
ers; "but I never knew you cared for
birthdays, my dear.
Aud Mr. Rocors did not tell her
that the lottery-drawing took place on
tho first of September. It was break
fast-time when tins remark, was made.
Mrs. Rogers sat over the table long
after her spouse had left, wondering
what sort ot present sue couia make
him for his birthday.
She had not a penny of her own,
nor had she any means of earniugone.
Aud to send a man a birthday present
for which the bill must come in to
him, might not be considered a deli
cate attention even from a wife.
"I don't suppose I can give any
tbincr nicer thau a pen-wiper or a pin
cushion," she said, with a sigh; "but
I'll do that, at least."
And then ehe rummaged out of her
bag -of odds and ends black cloth and
and velvet, and a few gold beads gilt,
rather ami hid them at the bottom
of her work-basket.
There were only three days between
that and the first of September. And
when she remembered the design for a
fino pen-wiper a butterlly gorgeous
with red and black wings nnd gold
eyes nnd body she set to work on it
diligently. Needing a card for tho
center of the lTair, she peered into
boxes and drawers, until, at tho bot
tom of Mr. Rogers hnir trunk, she
found tho very thiug she wanted a
yellow, dingy thumb-marked thing
with 777 upon it; nnd she made use
of it nt once. Then sweetly smiling,
and quite uncon-cious oTwlint she had
done, she finished olf the pen-wiper
with antenure of gold thread, and hid
it until the birthday should dawn.
On that day tho Wondciful first of
September Mr. Rogers arose betimes;
and so did his wife.
She presented him with his pen
wiper, lie accepted it with a kiss,
and pretended to feel thankful, though
it only reminded him of his deals, his
copies, the siavery of his life.
Now that the time had como, he felt
that he had only gijandefed money
that 777 was a blank. He dreaded to
glance at the column of the paper in
which tho prizes would' be published,
lie groaned and lit J hie face iu his
hand3.
"Are you ill, dear?"
Rogers,
lie only groaned again.
At thjs moment camo
man's knock, and, with a
Rates of Advertising.
Ono Souaro fl Inch,) one Incrtion - $1 .10
OneSiiiain " one monlli - II 00
OncS'iiinro " . threw months - U 00
OneSiiiaro " ono year - - 10 00
Two Siunres, one year ... 15 On
QunrtorCol. " - - - 80 00
Half " " . - - GO IM)
Ono " " - - - . 100 (K
Legal notices at established rates.
Marriage and denth notices, gratis.
All bills for fearlv advertisements col
lected quarterly. Temporary advortisc--incuts
must be paid tor in advance
Job work, Cash on Delivery. i
asked Mr.
the pnper
gu lden re
vulsion of feeling, he rushed to' the
door.
He took the paper into his shaken
hands, and spread it on the table, and
the first words that met his eyes were
"777 Capital prize, 2,000."
The effect of this announcement on
Mr. Rogers was tremendous. He
started to his feet and danced about
the room. He shouted "Huzzahl"
and gave three cheers, as though he
had been at a political meeting. Then
he rushed to the table where his boys'
copy-books lay piled, and, seizing them
one by one flung them into the open
grate, yelling : ,
"No more school teaching! .No
more slavery I Iluzzalf!"
Mrs. Rogers, weeping and wringing
her hands, besought him to come to
his senses, and felt fully assured that
her husband had suddenly become a
raving maniac.
Finally ho hmsheu by throwing the
butterfly pen-wiper on the top 'of the
fire, niaa lulling into a chair weeping.
Then little Mrs. Rogerscame out of
her corner, and, with both arms around
his neck, besought him to tell her
what ailed him.
"Seven hundred and seventy-seven!
Capital prize 1" said Mr. Rogers. "I've
drawn it Esmeralda 1"
Esmeralda rushed for the paper,
found the list of prizes, read the an
nouncement, and fat down gasping for
breath.
"That's whv you burnt the copy
books," she said. "Cut oh ! why need
you have burnt ray peu.-wipci? It was
so pretty! I dcclaro I could save it.
I believe it's only scorched."
But Mr. Rogers was not quite him
self. "Hang pens, pen-haudles, nnd pen
wipers!" he said and jammed his boot
heel into the coals. "I'll never touch
one agaiu."
Mrs. Kogers folt hurt, out sue sun
made allowance for her husband ; and
the fact of the prize was just begin
ning to dawn upon her.
"Are you sure?" said she. "Oh!
do, show me the ticket! Perhaps you've
made a mistake. Seven hundred and
Oh, dear! I can't believe it."
"I'll show you !" said Mr. Rogers,
wiping his forehead. "Here, Esmer
alda!" He walked into the little bedroom,
and knelt down by his trunk. Ho
felt down to the bottom. He felt at
the sides. He tossed things out. Ho
crlared wildlv.
"It s here 1 be said. "I Know is
hero: but 1 can't find it.'
"Oh, Rogers 1 cried bis wile, "whnt
was ic like? 1 ell me!
"Yellow eauare dirty. Lsmeral-
Ja! you haven't doue anything with
it rw
Esmeralda gave a shriek. She Hew
to the grate.
The pen-wiper! Save it, sho
screamed. .
"Hansr the pen-wiper!" cried Mr.
Rogers, and he jammed his heel into
the coals once more, and the flame
burst hot and red over the half burnt
butterfly aud consumed it in an in
stant. "Can't you think ot anything
else but that confounded pen wiper 7
The ticket! Look for it, Esmeralda !"
"It's iu the butterfly! Mow did 1
know? vou never told me! I thought
it was an old card I" said Esmeralda.
"Oh ! why didn't you save it ?"
"In the butterfly? What butterfly?
cried Mr. Rogers, staring about him.
"Butterfly, pen wiper!" said Mrs.
R., aud fainted iu the corner.
It happened to be Saturday. Tho
school had a holiday. All the day long
the master sat and stared at the fire.
All tho day long tho wifo wept and
bemoaned herself. Ho took no pity
ou her. Ho had tail :
"I hate you, Eincraldn, nnd never
enn forgive you !"
And she thought of suicide.
They had no dinner. At night she
made tea, nud they drank it with
averted faces. Then she crept to her
little spare bed -room up stairs, leaving
him by the fire. Twice in the night
she listened over the stairs. He was
pacing up nnd down, talking to him
self. It was a dreadful nistht for both.
! But whether nights nre sad or happy,
morning conies, and breakfast tune.
The cnurch-bells rang sweetly; but
neither of that wretched pair went to
church.
It never could be forgotten that
miserable Sunday by cither of them.
And, worst of nil, Monday morning
was coming, and the schoolboys, and
the work of the dny.
About dusk Mr. Rogers bethought
him to .walk out. Generally they
walked out together. Now, Mrs.
Rogers tat nnd heard the voices of the
people in the street, nnd felt, ns she
said to herself, as though she were di
vorced. When Mr. Rogers returned his tea
w&3 on a stand, and Esmeralda was
shut up in the spare bed-room again.
Both arose next morning, un refresh
ed nnd miserable. She felt like a
criminal ; he as the very vengeful
ghost of tho foully-murdered man
might be supposed to feel. He asked
himself aloud a number of singular
questions : "Why do men marry idiots,
who make pen-wipers of two thousand
pounds?" "Why didn't she poison
mo? Better that than beggar nie!"
he said, still to himself, still aloud.
"But she shall sutler for this !"
And then Mrs. Rogers wept. Her
poor eyes bulged out of her head.
Theie was a big, swollen vein down
tlio middle ot her lorchcad. Mie was
undoubtedly the most wretched of lit
tlo women.
As ho sipped his coffee, and sho
cried into tiers, the morning paper
flew into the window, which stood
open. It was the man's way of sav
ing timo. It fell at Mr. Rogers' feet,
lie took it up and opened it, with a
bitter remembrance of his last open
ing of the paper. And these were the
first words that met his eye:
Special Announcement. The
managcrsot the lottery desire to rec
tuv a grave mistake in featurday s re
iort. No. 777 did not draw the capi
tal prize. It was drawn by XSo. 770.
The fault is the printer's.
"Hang the printer!" cried Mr
Rogers. "Esmeralda !"
"Oh 1" said EsmeraMa.
"I forgive you, my dear!" snid Mr.
Kogers.
"I'll never say another word to vou
about it noverl"
"Oh! how noble!" sobbed Mrs
Rogers.
Then Mr. Rogers went to his school
boys aud his conies; and the bov who
had come to "F" had "Fool, Folly,
Foolish, Foolishness," on the top-line
ot his book ; nnd the hoy who had
como to "I" wrote "Idiot, Idiots
Idiot, Idiots, after his masters pat'
terns, all the writing-hour.
JOAtJ! IN 1I1,1,1I( IN Ml III) VIIOOO.
When I was nbout to leave tho
mouulains of Oregon u few years a'o
and try my fortune in the great wide
world, ns nie phrase rims, an old man
sittu.g on a wunn fence ono evening.
Ins bucks-kin legs hanging down, said
to me very tenderly and wisely : "Jo
nqin, don't you go ; the world's an im-
nostor, and it it Iced you on husks, ns
it did the probable sou. " But I told
him I was resolved to go; then the
old man locked down into the sun
that wns falling int the Pucifio sea
like a mighty hemisphere of fire, then
up at his Hock ot fcheep feeding on the
hillside, and said : "Wal, Joaquin, if
you must go, go; but you'll como
back some .lay to the old ranch.
You'll bo sick of the world and sorry
you went, and you won't have no buck
skin clothes, nnd you won't have lir
home. Jolt when you eo come back
for you'ro a cood meanin' bov.
Jnnqiiin and havo no- buckskin
clothes and no home, you must come
to me nnd I'll give you a home, nnd
you shall live with me and tako care
of my sheep, ut $-10 n month, as long
as you live.
Well, I have worn out my other
clothes, nnd I have no home, but, I
can t go Wck to the old man iu tho
sheep business, for, as the French say,
lie is dead aud gone over to the major
ity, and 1 como to you to-night to lec
ture. I tell you all this to show you
that this is not my favorite pursuit,
and also to show to you that I have
not the highest opinion of the present
lecturer. iNor have 1 ot any man
who wins notoriety or a name iu quite
another field, aud then consents to ex
hibit himself for Jhire and call that
lecturing. No, I had preferred the
shce business, and at this moment
wish 1 bad accepted the old man s offer.
At one ot the railroad depots in
Detroit, the' other day, a lady walked
up to the ticket window and smilingly
paid :
"I know iust how women nrs, nnd I
don't propose to bother nny one. An
swer me a few questions, nnd I Jl sit
down and sav iiothini' to no one till
train time. How far is it to Grand
Rapids? What's the fare? When docs
the train leave ? When do we arrive
there 1 Where do they check bnggago ?
Which track will tho train start from?
How can I tret to Muskegap from
Grand Rnnids? How far is it? What's
the fare? Do I change cars? Is there
a palace coach on the road? Shnll I
get a lay-over ticket ? Cuu I check my
baggage clear through? Is there n
conductor on this road named Smith?
Do vou allow dogs in the passenger
cars? and can a child ten year old
I'll !VVlli"K t
Having been answered, sho kept her
nromiso to Bit still and tho depot po
Hceman never had the least bit of
trouble in seeing her off.
James Garland, of East Brunswick
N. J., bavins shot his wifo in the head
three times the other day, "locked
himself in a room, shot himself three
times in the heud, opened a main ar
tery, aud crushed his skull with n
hammer." If he had then swallowed
half an ounce of strychnine nnd melt
ed lead.nud jumped out of n nine-story
window, he would have como very
near rousing a suspicion that he in
tended to injure himself seriously.
Tho litt'.o daughter of a clergytur.il,
after having hud clmrgo of the baby
all day while the folks were renovat
ing the house, nsked tit night if sho
might pray for what s!m wished.
The requctt being granted, sho Slid
her usual pray er.siipplemcii ting it v i 1 In
"And, phase, Lord, don't let 114 iiuVO
any inure hoii-sc-fh ::niii'.' !"
it is related that a man thought to
gain sympathy from his wile by -pretending
he had taken enough lauda
num to kill six men. He simulated
the effects of tho narcotic so well that
his wife rushed for the doctor and the
neighbors. By the time these had
gathered around him the shammiug
husband deemed it time to assure the
doctor he was merely fooling. But
the ninn of medicine had lost one pa
tient by believing such an assertion,
and resolved in tho present case to run
no chances. So, while several men
held the patient, an emetic was admin
istered, and then the stomach pump
was called into requisition, and, lest
the patient, who was pretty well ex
hausted by this time, should full asleep,
the soles of his feet were beaten with
shingles, and finally twp men walked
lum up and down tbo room lor three
days and nights. It was then believed
the poison had been counteracted, ana
the patient wns released. The best
pnrt of the story is that tho physician
and thoso who attended the oil man
will not even now believe hi in when
he asserts that he was only shamming.
He is by nil odds the moat disgusted
individual in tho Stnto.
The theory of a subterranean com
munication between Lakes Erie nnd
Ontario is sustained by cureful obser
vation mnde by the United btates
Lake Survey officers, with the hydrom
eter, which show that the volume of
water passing down the St. Lawrence
river greatly exceeds that, passing
through the Detroit river. As there
are no large streams entering the lakes
between the mouth of the Detroit river
and the head of tho St. Lawrence, it
is a very interesting problem to dis
cover whero this surplus of water
conies from.
The editor of tho Romo, N. Y., Sen
tinel has been shown "a design for an
uphostf red front gate," which seems
designed to beeomo popular. Tho
footboard is cushioned and there is a
warm soapstono on each side, the in
side step being adjustable, bo that a
short girl can bring her lips to tho
line of any given moustache, without
trouble. If tho gate is occupied at
10:30 p. m., nn iron hand extends
from cue of the gate-posts, seizes tho
young man by the left ear, turns him
around, and ho is nt once started for
home by a steel foot.
Is it not astonishing that men, w ho
have the wholo world to conquer, will
bother their great bends with tho
tightness of a woman's skirt? How
about your stove pipe hnts? They
make your heads bul I and greasy as
a dish-cloth, yet you veur them.
Would that some prophetess might ar
rive in Israel and tell the awful conse
quences of this fashion. A Lady.
"My dear," suid tin nU'ectionato
husband, "I'm surprised that you will
consent to iho degradation of wearing
another woman's hair on your head."
"Is that nny worse than your wearing
another sheep's wool on your back;"
retorted the euuallv U licet i Ii;'.to wife.
I
A lofiy position tho top of n:i cd
I itoiial stall'.
i