18 rUBMBIIED EVERY WEDNKSDAY BY W. R. DUNN. Orrlco In Krox's Dulldlr3i Elm. Street, TKTtMS, f2.00 A YEAR. No Subscriptions rceolvod for a shorter period than liireo months. Correspondence solloltod from nil parts of the country. No notice will bo taken of arinnn ynious communications. Mnrrlagos and Death notice Inserted (trails. BUSINESS DIRECTORY. . NEWTON PETTIS. MILKS W. TATB. PETTIS & TATE, ATTORNEYS AT LAW, JL hn, Street, TIOtfESTA , r.i . Isaac Ash, A TTOnVF.Y AT T,AW. on Cltv. Pn. J"V Will practice In tho various Courts of r orost County. All husinoss entrusted to li csro will roeclvo prompt attention. W. W. Uuon, Oeorg A, Jenk, TtoM4t r. nraokvlllo, Tm. Mason, A Jenks, ATTOTtNKYS AT LAW. Oulce on Kim Street, above Walnut, Tiouosln, l'a. C. W. Gllflllan, ATTOrtNKY AT LAW, Franklin, A'e nano Co., Pa. tf. J. . HARMS, D. D. FASHETT, HAllJtlH C FASSETV, Attorneys at Law, Tltusvtlle Penn'a. "PRACTICE In all the Courts of Warren, X Crawford, Forest and Venango Coun ties. 4l-tf W. P. Mcrcilllott, ATTOTiNEY A COUN.HKLOU AT LAW Tionosta, Pa. Office on Elm Street. Tho professional services of tho Hon. H. P. Johnson can bo secured through mo If desired In any business entrusted to me in Forest Co. Collections promptly attended to. Also Ileal Estuto Agent. Tionesta House. MITTEL, Proprietor, Elm St., Tio- nesta, l'a., at tho moutli of thecrcek, Mr. Ittlo has thoroughly renovated tlio Tionosta House, and re-furnished It com pletely. All who patronizo him will bo woll entertained at reasonable niton, iiO ly FOREST HOUSE, DltLACIC I'ROrniETOn. Opposite Court House, Tionesta, Pu. Just opened. Everything new anil clean and frosh. The best of liquors kept constantly m hand. A portion of the public patron 'nie Is respectfully solicited. 4-17-ly Holmes House, , nnOXESTA. PA., opposite tho Depot. A C. 1. Mable, Proprietor. Good Nta blind connected with tho houso. tf. Syracuse House, Tl DIOUTK, Pa., J. 1 M AOI.K, Troplo torn. Tho houso hashed! thoroughly refitted and is now in the llrst-elnss order, with tho best of accommodations. Any nforniatiou coneorninjr Oil Territory lit this point will bo ehoorfiillv furnished, -fy J. it D. MAOKR, Exchange Hotel, IOWEU TI1UOUTE, Pa., I). S. Hams J PEKi. .V Son Prop's. This house having been relitod is now the most desirable stop- JiiiK place in Tidiuuto. A good Billiard loom attached. 4-1 v National Hotel, XRVIN'ETON, PA. W. A. Hallenbnck, Proprietor. This hotel is New, and Is ow open as a first class house, situate at (injunction of the Oil Creek Allegheny ktivorand Philadelphia A Erie Hull roads, pposite tho Depot. Parties having to lay vcr trains will find this tho most conveii- ent hotel in town, with first-eluss aucniu iiodationg and roasonablo charges. tf. Dr. J. L. Acorrtb, PHYSICIAN AND SITROKON, who lias had fifteen years' experience in a largo and successful practice, will attend all Professional Calls. Ofllce in his Drug anil Grocery Store, located in 'J'idiouto, near Tidioute House. IN HIS STORE WILL BE FOUND A full assortment of Medicines, Liquors Tobacco. Cigars, Stationery, Glass, Paints, Oils, Cutlery, and fine Groceries, all of tho best quality, and will be sold at reasonable rates. JI. R. BURGESS, an experienced Drug gist from New York, has charge of tiio Store. All prescriptions put up accurately. iSO. A. PALS, Fwit. J. T. DALE, Cuhkr. TIOUESTA SAVINGS BANK, Tionesta, Forest Co., Pa. This Rank transacts a General Ranking, Collecting and Exchange llusiness. Drafts on tho Principal Cities of the United States and Europe boughtandsold. Gold and Silver Coin and Government Securities bought and sold. 7-30 Bonds converted on the most favorable terms. Interest allowed on time deposits. Mur. 4, tf. Lloyd & Son, WATER STREET, TIONESTA, PA. IT AVE JUST OPENED an extensive A X StOuk of FLOUR AND FEED, GROCERIES AND PROVISIONS, "Which they offer to the public at rates as low as can be ottered by any other estab lishment in town. Give us a call before purchasing elsewhere. 0-3m. LLOYD A SON. SLOAN & VAN GIESEN. BLACKSMITHS AND WAGON-MAKERS. Corner of Clrch and Elm Streets, TIONESTA. I A. This firm is prepared to do all work in lis line, and will warrant everything dono hi their simps to give satisfaction. Par ticular attention given to IIOKSIl-SlIOEIXtt, Give them a trial, and you will not re gret it. 13-ly. SUBSCRIBE for the Forest Republican O Jt will pay, Let us havo Faith VOL. V. NO. 10. D. W. CLARK, (COMMrsSIONKn's CLERK, FOItKsT CO., PA.) 11 EA L EST A TB A G EXT. HOUSES and Lots for Sale and UENrp Wild Lauds for Salo. 1 . I have superior facilities f..r ascertnining the condition of tnxos and tax deeds, iVc, and nm therefore qualiHcd to net intelli gently as agent of those living at a dis tance, owning lands In tho County, Ofllce In Commissioners Kooin, Court House, Tionesta, Pa. 4-41-ly. D. W. CLARK. r.nw. nmrmnn. r-rr.t. K- l. DITHHIIHJK, TreM. T. A. VRinirT, Burr. OKO. W. nil IIIIIIX1R, nu.iiMM Stumor. THE SUPERIOR LUMBER CO., MANUFACTURERS OF Pino Lumber, Lath, Shingles &c. Mills on Tionrsta Creek, Forest Co., Pa. Yards k Office cor. 12A & Rail Road Sis., PITTSBURGH, PA. Jos. Y Saul, PRACTICAL Harness Maker and Sad dler. Three doors north of Holmes House, Tionesta, Pa. All work Is war ranted, tf. KI1W.IRD DITI1H1DOK. It D. DITHRIIaS FORT PITT GLASS WORKS. Established A. D. 1827. DtTHEltPGE & SQcC, MANUFACTUnERS OF Dithridge's xx Flint Glass PATENT OVAL LAMP CHIMNEYS. AND Silvered Glas3 Reflectors. These chimneys do not break by heat. Ask for DiTHitinoEs. Tako no other. DITHRIDG1C fc SON, 25-ly. Pittsburgh, Ta. Xcw Itoardiiip; HoiUiC. MRS. S. S. IIULINGS has built, a larKo addition to her house, and is now nro- pareil to acommodiiteaiiumberornerina- nent boarders, and all transient ones who may favor her with their patronage A (rood stable has recently been built to nc coinmodato tho horses of pucsts. I'liariios reasoimtlo. Residence on Kim St., oppo site S. Haslet's store. iy-ly JOfJES HOUSE, CLARION, TEXN'A.! S. S. JONES Proprietor. NEW GROCERY AND PROVISION STORE IN TIONESTA. GEO. W. B0VARD&G0. HAVEjustbroualiton a complete and carefully selected stock of FLOUU, . GROCERIES, PROVISIONS, and everything necessary to the complete stock ofa tirst-classtirocory House, which iney navo openeu out at tlielr establish ment on Elm St., first door north of M. K. Church. THAS, COFFERS SUGARS, KYRUP3, FRUITS, SPICKS, HAMS, LARD, and rnoriszoxs of a ll kisd- at the lowest cash pricos. Goods warrant ed to be of the best quality. Call and ex amine, and we believe we can suit von. GEO. W. iiOVAKD 4 CO. Jan. 9, '72. A JI I II A C L 13 ! Mr. Samuel Roll, of W. E. Rchmertx Co., Wholesale Hoot and Shoe Manufactur ers, 31 Fifth avenue, Pittsburgh, Pa., has been attlicted with chronic rhcumntisli for thirty years, from his ripht hip to bis f(Kt, bavin ; to use a crutch and a cane, at times so painful as to utterly incapacitate him from attending to his business. Having tried every remedy known, without effect, except Gilliliind's Pain Killer, he was finally induced to try it. A second applica tion enabled him to lay asido his crutch, and a third effected a permanent cure. Mr. Hell is a popular and well-known citizen, is a living monument of tho ell'aeaoy of that great medical discovery, Gilliland's l'ain Killer. Tho alllicted should ask their grocer or druggist for it, and try its won derful power. Mr. (illliland, we under stand, wants a respectable agent in every town and county for it. The principal i ilce is at 7'i Third Avcnuo, Pittsburgh Pa. ACENTS WANTED. MALE & FEMALE. Business pleasant and pays better than any enterprise in tho bold. Agents make from f;i to $8 per day. Send stamp for samples and par ticulars. Address J. LATHAM A CO., 2!2 Washington. St., Uostou, Moss. 11-4 INSURANCE CO. OF NORTH AMERICA, No. 2112 Walnut Strhila. Incorporated 1794. Charter rerpetttal MARINE, ISLAND & FIRE INSURANCE Assets Jan; 1, 180!), f2,31K.323 3'J 0,000,o(io losses paid since its organiza tion. WM. HL'ULEU, Central Agent, Harrisburg, Pa. MILES W. TATE, Agent in Ti onesta, Forest County, Pa. 6m that Right makos Might; and TIONESTA, The Plain Fact. Besides tho lato Copperheads and certain discontented IJopublicnns, tho Ureeley pnrty includes a few theught ful meu sincerely desirous of reform, and honestly persuaded that it can come only by the defeat of Gen. Grant and tho Republican party. They are proud of the history of the party. They do not willingly mean to imperil a single result that it has achieved. They acknowledge tho great services of Gon. Grant in the war. They have no faith in Democrats, and they see in many ways the curious unfitness of Mr. Greeley for the Presidency. But, on tho other hand, they think that Gen. Grant is badly advised ; that tho Democrats have assented to the settle ment of the war; that Mr. Greeley means well ; that "the South" will be sullen until it has taken a successful part in a Presidential election ; and that the only way to dissolvo both parties and form a new is to defeat tho Republican. Therefore, not without regard and disgust, they think that they must vote against their old friends and the magnanimous chief of the armies that crushed the rebellion, and join hands with Beauregard and Fer nando Wood to elect Mr. Greeley. The Republicans think, then, that Gen. Grant is badly advised. Do they think thai Mr. Greeley will surround himself with wiser counselors? Mr. Samuel Bowles says that Mr. Greeley is tho prey of flatterers and sycophants. Would ho be less so as President? These Republicans have seen those who are most conspicuous in Mr. Gree ley's support; do their reputations and careers iuspiro the hope of a higher lone in administration 1 These Repub licans know how reluctantly Senator Schurz caruo to tho support of Mr. Greeley, and that, almost without ex ception, tho better meu nf the Cincin nati movement deplore his nomination. Upon what reasonable ground do they believe that Mr. Greeely will be better advised than Gen. Grant ? In the second place, these Republi cans think that the Democrats have acquiesced in tho result of tho war. But does it therefore follow that it is wise that a party chiefly composed of Democrats, including the mass of the late rebels, should obtain possession of the government? Why do the friends of Mr. Greeley claim tlie united white vote "with a part" only of the colored Vote at tho South ? Because tho color ed citizens know that tho Ku-Klux and the entire negro-hating spirit in the country desires the election of Mr. Greeley agaist Gen. Grant. Does tho victory of that spirit seem to our friends the way of peace and justice and equal rights? If the Democrats have acquiesced in the great results of the war, the Republicans believe in them. With which should they be trusted ? Our friends think also that Mr. Greeley means well. Perhaps he meant well when he encouraged and justified secession when he "nagged" Presi dent Lincoln to buy a peace when he promoted foreign intervention when lie gravely perplexed Mr. Lincoln by J his Niagara performances when he com plai tied to Mr. Seward long ago that ho had not been rewarded with an office when he half apologized for Sweeny and Tweed whenever he has done any thing which showed his fa tal want of judgment. Had he been President instead of Lincoln, he might have meant well in surrendering to the rebellion. Do our friends thitk it enough to mean well, if you have no 1 .... judgment r Again, they say that the South will be sullen until it has taken success ful part in an election. Why? Be cause it broods over tho old defeat. Now if the Republican policy had been vindictive or harsh, we "would condemu it with our friends. But it has not been so. It gave equal suf frage because it was proved to be neces sary for the protection of equal rights. Tho Southern friends of Mr. Greeley made black codes in 1805 they would make them now if they dared. The Republicans gave equal suffrage ; they have granted an absolute amnesty, ex cept in two or three hundred instances; and they havo protected at the polls, with Mr. Greeley's most hearty ap proval, the colored citizens whom many of Mr. Greeley's Southern sup porters would have prevented from voting. For the adventurers who have gone into tho Southern States, and for the misgovcrnnient there, the Republican party can in no just sense be held responsible. While for tho ill-feeling that still exists the remedy is not in the success of those who de nounce the Republican rule as infa mous a success which would revive evsry spark of old hostility with an exulting expectation of revenge. The logical solution of the Southern situa tion is the dissolution of tho Demo cratic party, the party which is the perpetual hope of disaffection in the southern part of ihe couutry, and tho consequent consciousness that tho sit uation is to be improved, but not rad ically changed. And this Democratic dissolution our friends anticipate from the election of Mr. Ureeley as the regularly nominat ed Democratic candidate! It is not by success, however, that a party is usual R in.that Faith lot us to tho ond, PA., WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 14, 1872. ly dissolved. In 18G0 the Democrats nominated two candidates Mr. Breck inridge and Mr. Douglas and were defeated. In '64 they nominated Gen. McClcllan, and in '68 Mr. Seymour, and were "defeated. In '72 they will probably nominate Mr. Greeley. If they are defeated again, the party necessarily disbands, and new organ izations become possible. If they are successful with Mr. Greeley, they will bo tho same party, with the same gen eral sympathies, principles, purposes. Tho fact that Mr. Grcc'ey was a Re publican will no more prevent the Ad ministration being Democratic than the fact that Gen. Grant was not a Republican before the war has affect ed his Administration. Tho mass of voters who elect the President deter mine the character of tho Administra tion. If our friends think that the success of the Baltimore candidate would not be desirable if it were not Mr. Greeley, they ought not to wheo die themselves with the fancy that his nomination essentially changes the situation. Why will the Democrats nominate him, if such be their action? To defeat Grant. But why do they wish to defeat Grant? Is it that thero may bo great and generous reforms, or that they may obtain power? Did the monkey mean only to warm the cat's paws, to pull out the chestnuts? Har per's Weekly. Monaco, the last stronghold of the gamblers of Europe, was treated to a genuine sensation a few weeks since. There appeared upott the scene a par ty of elegantly dressed Americans in gloesy black suits, a profusion of dia mond rings, studs and broches, and tall hats of veiy shiny material. Those individuals took but little interest in tho games of chance which abounded all about them. They played a little and awkwardly, lost trifling sums, but in a few days improved wonderfully. played together pocketed 140,000 francs and broke tho bank, whereup on the compeers Hccused them of be ing a band of cheats ; to this charge the Americans replied by a display of revolvers which they seemed nothing loin to use. ihe appearance 01 the weapons caused tho Italian and French gamblers to fly precipitately from the field. Tho Americans departed with their spoils, and the card sharpers of Monaco are wondering it this Amen can invasion is to be repeated, and if so, how to protect themselves against shrewder and bolder rogues than them selves. Tho safest plan would be for them to change their calling, and if tho gamblers from the United States can, by their nefarious practices, put an end to public gambliug at Monaco, they will for once render society a ser vice. VTe learn from California exchanges just received that the enormous sum of two million dollars in Japanese gold currency was recently brought to San Francisco to be refined and prepared for the coinage under the new system adopted in Japan. These coins, call ed "nibos," are flat pieces of gold about one inch long and a half an inch wide, containing 20 per cent, of silver, and are valued at fifty-three cents each. The metal is to be return ed in the gold bars of about 900 fine, ready to bo converted into coin. The silver separated from the coin is also to be returned in fine silver bars. The coined money in circulation in Japan amounts in valuo to filly millions of dollars, and it was lound that with limited refining works in that country it would tako five years to accomplish the object of changing tho currency. Arrangements were therefore made with gold refineries of San Francisco to refine $20,000,000 worth of "uibos," the coin to bo sent at the rate of 82, 000,000 per month. The Japaueso have a mint at Hogo, where the re fined bars are turned into the new coinage. There is nothing more difficult for a sane man to understand than why people will commit suicide. Tho pro blem is rendered still more preplexing by the fact that many suicides grow out of causes which are considered the most trivial. Only a little while ago there was that girl who plunged into a watery grave because she had worts, and tho man who hung himself be cause his wile had her hair cut off in spite of his opposition ; and now with in a few days a West Virginia man goes out iuto his baru and becomes his own hangman because his dinner isn't ready promptly. As in these eases tho victims must have been infinitesimally endowed with brains and withal so senselessly sensitive that their lives would not only be a burden to them selves but to everybody about them, it was as well, perhaps, to count their taking of thenibeives olf tho only "happy thought" of their lives, and for their beHefit make tho distinction of justifiable suicide. One of the down-trodden in Indiana lately applied for a divorce, and tho Judge intimated his intention to decide against her. Tho ludy, alarmed, be gan to shed tears, and her dignified counsel, edging his chair close to her's whispered: "That's right, cry; try like the d 1, and you'll get your de cree." In less than ten minutes she was a lone wonutu. i 3PUBLICAN. daro do our duty as we understand it."--LINCOLN. Eli Perkins About Economical Girls. My old statistician says there are just four of these beautiful sage green dresses in Saratoga. Three, he says, are worn by very stylish ladies, and one is worn by one old lady who has no business to wearing it. Every time he sees one of those beautiful dresses he goes into an ecstacy of delight. Ho rubs his hands and says, "There comes the agony of Parisn;$400,if it's a cent." When we look up it is a sage green. Yesterday one of the beautiful young ladies who wears a sage green took a ride over to the lake with my friend Gus. Gtis has got good, blood in him, but he isn't very "stampy." Ho al ways takes to expensive girls, nnd af ter getting interested in them they talk expensive talk about camel's hairs,vcl vet suits and trips to Europe, that poor Gus gets frightened off He comes up in my room and says ho don't be liec there is a girl in New York who don't cost her father $3,000 a year just for nice clothes. Then he buries his face in his hands and says, "O dear, there is 110 chance for a poor fellow on $-5,000 a year." Yesterday, Gus came into my room looking light and happy. His eyes fairly shone with ccstacy of a blissful emotion. "What is it, Gus?" I asked. "I've found her I she's here!" and then stopped to catch his breath. "Who's here?" I askeJ, thinking perhaps that Mrs. Woodhull or Susan B. Anthony had arrived. "Why, the girl I've been lookin for; sweet, young, stylish ; and not expen sive !" "Lightning, Gus!" said I, putting on my glasses, "I'd like to see such a girl myself. Where is she?" "We just came in from a ride; she's down in the parlor; a regular stunner, in sago green I and the economical I" "Snge green, sago g-r-e-e-n, I mut tered to myself, thinking of the $500 I saw a young lady pay for just such a dress; how do you know she isn't ex pensive. How do you know " "Why confound it," broke in Gus, "I know it. I've been talking to her for three hours. She talked very eco nomical, just like a sensible girl." ' What did she say?" I continued. "Why, she said sho was looking for a true man, a man brave and gener ous, with love iu his heart, and with such a man she said she could be hap py iu a garret ; yes, she said she could be happy in a garret with the man she loved. Hal ha!" and Gus whirled round twice and kicked the crown out of my best Dunlap hat in the excess of his mirth. I made Gus take mo right down for an introduction to his economical friend, and then I let him go off to change his coat for dinner. Miss D. was pretty ar.tr stylish, too. She had on a love of a $75 hat and thoso pretty $18 laced gaiters which the man makes under tho Coleman House. Her dress was the richest gros grain sage with panicr, wattcau, polonaise with court train. It con tained exactly 176 yards of silk. On. pretty hands were six-button gaslight green kids, which lost themselves un der point lace undersleeves and over diamond bracelets. On her arm she carried a $1,500 camel's hair Bhawl. "This is mother's, Mr. Perkins," she remarked. "I took it in case of a rain. I don't expect to have camel's hair and regular diamonds until I'm married. Mother's last words when I left home, were, 'Now Lizzie, don't bo introduced to any foreigners or lose your jewelry.' " "Couldn't you bo happy nfter you are morried without camel's hair and diamonds?" I asked, taking in her $75 pearls and point luce fan, and looking down at her point lace under skirt. "Why I hadn't thought much about it. That's just what your friend Mot ley and I were talking about. And such a nice long talk " "Then you and Gus have been dis cussing the love-iu-a-cottuga idea, have you?" I interrupted. "les, that was it ; and he s so nice. "And didn't you say that you could live iu a garret with a brave, hand some man, whom you loved dearly?" "Yes, L did say that. I don't care if I do blush. I 6aid I could live happily in a garret with tho mun I loved and I could we could have a nice elevator and havo our meals sent in from Delrnonico's. Why, those Parun Stevens 50,000 garret suits are just as coj?y as they cau be !'' This, ajas! was the economical sweetness of my friend Uus, who could live in a $0,000 gat ret with tho man sho loved. Thei-e are tho economical young ladies who como to Saratoga and deceive us poor fellows who talk garret, get our soitairca and then come the elevator and lunch from Delmoiii co dodge on us. These, alas! are the young ladies who gain our honest love just to steal our money for $400 sage green dresses, with viillcaun and polo unite all cut 011 tho bias, or sell us. These aro the dear creatures whoso magnanimous fathers generously give awny to us saying, "Tiiko her Adol phus, and bo happy alas! if you can!"- -V. Y. Commercial Advvvllner. S2 PER ANNUM. Flowers in the Senate. Senator Cameron adorned the de bate upon tho tax and tariff bill with a charming dissertation upon Ameri can fruits and flowers. He says: "There is the rose. There has been no improvement on the rose in a thou sand years. You can make it produce more and oftener in tho year, but the old cabbago rose that every man not over fifty years of age must rememein bcr that ornamented the garden of his mother, is the most fragrant not only of all the roses, but of all the plants which give pleasure from their per fume. "First in tho year is the crocus, with out nny fragrance ; and then comes the hyacinth, which makes every man who puts it to his nostrils glad and happy. Afur a while in short succes sion comes the lilac, and then we all believe the lilac is more beautiful in its fragrance than tho hyacinth was: but we forget that directly when the rose comes, winch is tlio queen of all the flowers. After awhile comes the jessamine, and then is the honeysuckle, We have ihe most delicotts of all that tribe in our forests. The wild and the red honeysuckle of tho mountains of iennsylvama and New lork in its fragrance is equal to all that were ever brought here from abroad, and vet we are bringing from every part of the world, lor there is a variety in ever)' nnd all honeysuckles of every grade and of every color, and the jessamine, which is a cousin of the honeysuckle, is brought to us from abroad, when we produce it here, in the South partial larly, more beautiful and moro fra- graut than it is abrond." Is not that a delightful bit of nature to fold away in the dry and dusty Con gressional Globe t The venerable Sen ator should be rewarded for his gallant defense of our native flora with a wreath of flowers. The most faithful lover who has a name, and being, outside of trashy novels, lives in Danbury. Tho parents of the young lady are opposed to this championship, but it non t make him proud. Sometimes the old gentleman reaches him with his boot before he can get over the fence, but tho young man doesn't lay up ill-feeling on ac count of that; he only smiles at the despoiler of his pants when he meets him, and calls it "heaping coals of hroonlus head, 'baturday evening he thought ho would get up a surprise for the old chap. He put a paving stone in each of his coat tail pockets, and started fur tho fence as usual. The old man let out for him with increased enthusiasm, nnd caught him caught him good. Then he laid down on the grass and said "I die by the hand of an nssassin. liut the young man passed on without a word, and smiled the most heavenly smile of forgiveness ever seen ot that street. Everybody should learn to swim. Swimming is an accomplishment which all person?, nialo aud female, should, if possible, acquire. There is 110 tell ing when or whero it may bo brought inio practical use lor a saving of life, while, as a source of healthful and de lightful recreation, it holds a front rank. It is a healthful sign to note the tact that fresh water bathing by ladies is becomiug every year more in vogue. A lew years ago any other than salt-water bathing was not to be thought pi, but now ladies find that there is just os littlo impropriety iu putting on their bathins dresses and taking a bath iu a river or creek, as 111 the surt at Capo Miy or Long Branch, A Paris correspondent relutes a story which may bo takeu as an illus tration of sublime impudence. He states that a gentleman walking with his little boy on the banks of the riv er, the child slipped over the bunk in to tho water, and would certainly have been drowned but for tho com ago ofa man who was fishing, who jumped in and saved tho boy. Tho father thank ed him cordially, but asked him if he would add to the obligation, ns he was already wet through, by swimming for liio boy s cap. A farmer's wifo in speaking of the smartness, aptness and intelligence of her son, said : "Ho can read "fluently in any part of tho Bible, repeat tho whole catechism and weed onions 11s well as his father." "Yes, mother," added the young hopeful, "and yester day I licked Ned Rawson, throwed the cat into the well, and stole old Hick ley's gimlet." Two women, an infant, uud a bottle milk caused a great commotion on the Jtffersotivillo train at Columbus, In diuna, two days since, by the accident al loss of tho child's sustenance, which dropped out of tho cur w indow. The younger woman pulled tho bell-cord, stopped tho train, and gent a young man after it. Two suitors for a lady's hand in Kansas City, not being alilo to settle the case by arbitration, repaired to a graveyard, just alter daylight 011 the Fourth, and pommelled each other af ter tho rules of the London prize ring. Tho lady her.-elf w:u present, and drove away with the one whom tho referee declared tho winning man. Rates of Advertising. One Square (1 inch,) one Inertions - fl .".0 One SiUiiro " one month - it On One S'pinre " threo months - (100 One Honiara " one year - - 10 no Two Srinnres, one year ... ; on Quiii-tor Col. " - - - - :jc) on Hair " r,0 00 One " " . . . . 100 00 Ittisincss Curds, not exceeding one inch In length, ?10 per yenr. I-cfral notices at established rates. These rates nre low, nnd no deviation vill bo mixle, or discrimination ninonir utroris. Tho rates ollered nro such, as will mnko it to the advantage of men dol. business in the limits of the circulation of tlio paper to advertise liberally. The Quaker city belles have things all their own way nt Cape May. A boy preacher has been astonish ing the people of Griffiin, Ga. A council meeting without a fight is considered worthy of record in Kan sas City. At Bloominglon, III., the liquor law is dodged by placards over the saloons. "Admittance ten cents; drinks free." Sambo, in speaking of the happiness of married people, said, "Dut or 'pends altogcdder how dcy enjoys theuislres." Josh UlilingS"" says' :"'"'' lien you strike ile, stop borin ; menny a man haz bored clean thru and let it run out at the bottom." A man iu Richmond, Va.; ha.i worn the same pair of linen trousers fortv nine summers. They are just in stylo this year. A vicious horse in Michigan lately kicked his master's jaw off and knock ed his teeth down his throat, choking him to death. A North Carolina girl, though per fectly bliud, threads a needle, weaves nice cloth, and does other things as well as many persoiiB who caa see. A California lady was made insane by tight lacing, and several California gentlemen have been made crazy by being otherwise tight. It is said that the highest salary paid to u female teacher iu this country is paid to Miss Anna C. Brackett, of' tho St. Louis Normal School. It is $28, 000. Among the engines of civilization for the extermination of the aborigines may bo cited a base-ball club which the Choctaw Indians have got up among themselves. Tho following new definition is sug gested for the forthcoming edition of Webster's Unabridged : Tomahawk An agricultural implement chiefly used for hair raising. . A young man of convivial habits has discovered one good thiug nbout a sea voyage. You can get as tight as you please every day, and everybody "thinks you're ouly sen-sick. Spinks is not going to do any morq in conundrums.. He asked his wifo why he was like a donkey, nnd she said because he was born so. He says that tho answer is very different from that. A contemporary announces that a young, pretty and wealthy Omaha widow, who had lost three husbands, took advantage of leap year by spirit ual direction ; proposed to tlio fourth and has now married him. Tho Countess de Blanchherry, who shouldered a musket and fought as a common soldier at a battlo at Patey, uear Orleans, iu the last French war, lms been decorated with the Cross of tho Ivcgion of Honor. Thero was more exact scientific truth than he could explain in the reply of an Irish gardener to a question : "Why the evergreens havo been blasted throughJut the country?" "Shure," said he, "and they were burnt with the could last winter !" "How is it. mv dear, that vnu h.ivn never kindled a flame iu the bosom of man?" said an old lady to her pretty niece, who was norilonless. "Tim ran. son, dear," replied the young lady, "is, as vou well know, that I nm nut good match." A little four year old beset his moth er to talk to him and say something funny. "How can I?" she asked; "don't you see how busy I am baking these pies?" "Well, you might say, 'Charley, won't you have a pie?' That would bo funny for you." A lady about to bo absent from homo for a week told hor servant to keep hor gold fish nice and cleau, On the lady's return tho fish wero dead. "Died in two days, marm." "But what did you do to them?" "Please, marm, I took 'em out aud wined 'em clean aud next day they died." Local editing must be jolly in Salem, Washington county, N. Y. The ed itor of tho Press recently received tlio following delightful missive: "Youm fellers wunt to keep uu fellers names out of your paper else youm will get your d d suoot busted. This is bizzi- ness. A gentleman connected with a Bos- Ion bank as a clerk, recently robbed the bank. Thev cu led him a "fellow" and other disreputable names at first, and some intimuted that he was a thief, for they'thought he had stoler. only a few dollar. But it turns out thut ho took $S5,000, and is not a thief at all, but a defaulter. A deacon who keens a trrocerv store having instructed his clerk, wheu out ofa desired article, to call the at tention of the customer to the next best tiling, was 11 little astonished when his pastor called and enquired for new molasses, to hear the clerk say, "We have no new molusses, but we havo somo nice new rum," 3 1 i ,1 .. 1 U f! Z n a- Is j M i w It Ft I