The Forest Republican. (Tionesta, Pa.) 1869-1952, December 06, 1870, Image 1

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    M rUDMSHF.D "EVERY TUESDAY, BY
W. It. DUNN.
DiTlco In Krojfs Bulldlrig, Eln Street.
THUMB, f'2.00 A YKAH.
No Subscriptions received .for a shortor
period than throo months.
Correspondence solicited from all parts
of tlio country. tfo tiotioa will to taken of
annouymouscommunicationp.
Marrlagos and Death notice . Inserted
Kra'.is.
BUSINESS DIRECTORY.
TIONKSTA LODGE, NO. 477,
I. O. GkT.'M
Meets every Wednesday evening, at 8
o'clock. .
J. WINAN3, W. C. T.
M.CtiAUIt.W. 8.
. WKWTON PETTIS.
MILKS W. TATK.
PETTIS A TATE,
ATTORNEYS AT LAW,
jLlm Street,
---.. ...
TIONESTA, rA.
' Isaac Ash,
' . A TTORNRY AT LAW, Oil City, T.
UTi. will practlco in Uio various vourts or
'j ' I'orcst County. All business entrusted to
J. . -ills care will irecclvo prompt attention.
W.-E. Latly,
ATTOHNKY AT LAW AND ROLICI
TOU IN HAN'KKTFTCY, Tloncsta,
Forest Co., Vti., will practice in Clarion,
Venninto and Warren Counties. OIHco on
Kim Htroet, two doors above Lawrence's
rocerjr store. ' -. - . tf.
W. W. Mason,
TTOftNKY AT LAW. Office on Elm
.Street, abovo Walnut, Tlonosta, Pa.
. . C. W. Gilfillan, ,
ATTORNEY AT LAW, Franklin, Vo
4f imiiKo Co., Tn. tf.
Holmes House,
TIONKSTA, rA., opposite tbn TVnot.
C. I).. Mabio, Proprietor. Uood Sta
CUi'r connected with tlie house. tf.
Jos. Y. Sauf,
1)UCTK'AL Harness Mn!er and Sad-
JL dlcr. 'I'lireo doors north of Holuica
' Jloiifo, Tionesta, l'n. All ork is war-
'"I'1''1, 1L
Syracuso House, - , - ,
rpiDIOUTK, Pa!, J. v Y Maokk, Troplo
' J. tors. The house ha been thoroughly
refitted nnd iannw in the first -cla-i order,
with tho best of acuotmnodiii Ions. -.Any
. nformalion iMneoniinii Oil Territory ut
tliia noifit'Aill bu checrfollv furnished,
-lv J. JtD. MAUEH,
Exchange Hote,
T OWKU TIDIOUTE, Pa., D.'S. IUms
IJ ntcKf. it Kom Prop'H. This house having
1 rellted is now the most desirable slop
pin;? place in Tidioute. A good lhlliard
Jtoom attached. 4-ly
National Hotel,
TUVINF.TON, l'A. W. A. Hallenbsck,
Proprietor. This hotel is Nbw, and is
,iw open us a first class honso, situate at
ne Inaction of the Oil Creek A Allegheny
vtiv'crand Philadelphia & Erie Hailroads,
pposite tho Depot. Parties havinir to lay
ver trains will find this tho most eonven
cnt hotel in town, with first-class accom
modations and reasonable oharires. tf.
TifTt Son3 4 Co. 'a
NEW ENGINES. Tho undersigned have
forsalo and will receive orders for tho
' above Kiuriue. Messrs. Ti tit Sons A Co.
are now Kendinir to this market their 12
I torso Power Eiifrino with 11-lIorHe Power
toiler peculiarly adapted to deep wells.
Orru ks at Duncan A Chalfant s, dealers
in Well Fixtures, Hardware, Ae., Main St.
next iloor to Cimso llnuwi, I'lcasa'itvillo,
.and at MaiiHion Honso, TituRVille.
tf. K. HRKTT St iN , Afnts.
Joli K. H.iUcx k,
TTORNEY AT LAW and Sulicltor of
4 .il Patents, No. fiU." I'lench cti'opposite
'I teed House) Erio, l'a. Will practice in
tho several Slate Courts and tlio United
Slates Court. Special attention ;ivon to
.tolicitir;; patents for Inventors ; iui'rinne-
incuts, re-issue and oxtensiou of patents
..ui-ufiillv attended to. Koi'eronees : Hon.
.James Campbell, Clarion ; Hon. John 8.
, McCalniont, Eranklin; H. L. A A. II.
ltlchiTiond, Mcadvillej W. E. Lathy. Tl-
onosta. . 3 7
Dr. J. L. Aconb,
PHYSICIAN AND KUROEON, who has
I had ilfteon years' experiencoin a larpo
;and auccesst'ul practii-e, will attend all
Professional Calls. 1 Oflieo in his Druirand
Ornccry Store, located In (1'idiouto, near
lidiouto Jtouso.
-IN HIS STORK WILL BE FOUND
A full assortment of Medicines. Liquors
Tobacco, Cifrara, Stationery, tilass. Paints,
Oils. Cutlery, and rino Oroeeries, all of tho
best quality, and will be sold at reasonable
rates.
II. R. niTUOESS. an exnerielioed Drui?'
.). 1st from New York, has charge of the
sicire. All proscriptions put up accurately,
tf.
W. P. MerciUlott,
Attorney at Law.
' JUSTICE OF THE PEACE, .
AND
HEAL 13 H TATK AO EXT.
. TI 0 N PST A, PA-2T-lf
JOHN A. DALE, PSEt'T.
9HNA. PROPtR, VICIPREST. A. H.STEELt, CASHR,
TIONESTA
SAVINGS BANK,
Tionosla, Forest Co., Pa.
This Rank trnnsaclii a General nanklng,
Ool'tinu and Kxelmntre llusiness.
Dralts on the Principal Cities of the
L intoil states and I'.urope nouuhtanu sold.
Ciold and Silver Coin and Oovernmeut
Securities bduu'lit and sold. 7-3U'llouds
converted on the motvt fuvorublo terms,
1 Merest allowed on Uinu dcpoBits. !
Man i, tf.
. INSURANCE
CO. -OF NORTH AMERICA,
No. liZi Walnut St 1'lnla.
Incorporated H9 1. Cliurter Pprpetttal
MARINE, INLANDS FIRE INSURANCE
Assets Jan; 1, 1809, $2,348.323 39
$20,000,000 losses paid since its organiza
tion. WM. HL'JILKlt, Central Agoiit,
llurrisbur);, Pa.
MILKS W. TATE, Agent in Ti
onosta. Forest Couuty, Pa.
S6lu
-I
o
' Lot us have Faith
VOL: IIL NO. 35. ;
J. w. nowLAVn,
ai.ex. mcDowill
J. W. ROWLAND & CO., ;
MERCHANT TAILORS
AND DKAT.P.M IK
OcutM Furnishing OoodM,
And Agents for the Colobrntod Orovor A
Baker Sowing Machine
LIBERTY STREET, NEAR" DOE
FRANKLIN, PENN'A.
2'.CS tf.
WALLLIS'
I I
M - M
P . V
R K
O IMPROVED O
V V
E
D
E
D
M
A
a
i
c
M
A
O
MAGIC
I
C
BALK I
V. II. PERKINS & CO., Sole Propri,
etorg, traiikhn, Pa. . 44
JONES HOUSE,
CLARION, PENN'A.
-Proprietor.
STILL AHEAD.
OUR GREAT BOSTON
DOLL AH STORE!
Wo want good reliable agents in every
part of ths country, lly employing yonr
timo to form clubh and sondinir us orders,
vou can obtain the most liberal coiiiniiss
leus either in Cash or Morchaudiso, and
idl iroods sent by us will bo as represented
and wo fruarautce satisfaction to every one
deal inn with our house.
Agents should collect icn cents irom ev
ery customer, and forward to ns in ad
vance, for Descriptive lists of tlio goods
we sell.
Tho holders of the Checks, have the
cheeks have the iiriviloiro of cither pur
chasing the article thereon doscribod, or ot
oxclinniiing lor any article menuonmi on
our catalogue, numbering over !00 ditTer
ent articles, not ona of which can be pur
chtised in tho usual manner for tho same
money.
The" advantages of first sending tho
Cheeks are these: We are constantly buy
insr small lots of very valuablogoods.which
are not on our catalogue, and for which we
issue checks until all are sold; besides in
every club wo p'lt checks for Watches,
Quilts, Blankets, I); ess Patterns, or somo
other article of eitial value.
Wo do not oiler aningle articlo of mer
chandise that can be sold by regular deal
ers at our price. Wo do not ask you to
buy goods of us unless wo can sell them
cheaper than you obtain them In any oth
er way whilo'lho greater part oi our goods
are sold at about
Oiiellnirihol.egularlin.es
Our stock consists in part, of tho follow
ing goods :
Shawls, Blankets, Quilts, Cottons, Oing
hiims. Dress (ioods, Table Linen, Towels,
Hosiery, (iloves. Skirts, Corsets, Ac., Jcc.
Silver-Plated Ware, Spoons Plated on
Nickel Silver, Dessert Forks. Flve-Hottle
Plated Castors, Brillaiinia Ware, Gluss
Ware, Table and PorUct Cutlery, In great
variety.
Elegant French nnd German Fancy
Goods. Beautiful Photograph Albums,
the newest and choicest styles in Morocco
and velvet Bindings.
Gobi and Plated Jewelry of tho newest
stvlcs.
"Wo have also made arrangements with
one of the leading publishing houses that
will enable us to sell tho latest and stand
ard works of popular authors at aboutone,
half tho regular lirice : such as Byron
Mooro, Burns, Milton, and Tennvson's
Works, in Full Gilt and Cloth Bindings,
and hundreds of others. These and every
thintrelso for
ONE DOLLAR FOR EACH ARTICLE.
In every order amounting to over $r0,
accompanied bv tlio cash, the agent may
retain $2; and In every order ovei Jloo,
fl.00 may bo retained to PAY EXPBKSS
CJIAKGES
COMMISSION TO AGENTS.
For an order of $.'10 front a club of thirty
we will pay tho Agent as commission 33
5 ards bleached or brown sheeting, good
dress pattern, all wool pants pattern , or
3.60 in cash.
For an order of $60, from a club of sixty
we will pay the Agent 5 yards, brown or
bleached sheeting, hunting ease watch, all
wool shall, or $7,00 in cash.
For an order of $100, from a club of 100
we will pay the auent 110 vard 1 ward
wide, shotting, splendid sewing machine
or $11 cash.
SEND MONEY BY REGISTERED LET
TE1I. For .further particulars send for
catalogues. Address.
Geo. A. Plummer & Co., .
(Successor to Harris & Plummer,)
30 and 40 Hanover St.. Boston, Mass
1133 ly.
A CI It D
A Clergyman while residing in Stiutli
America as a nnssloiiary, discorved a safe
and simple remedy for tho Cure of Ner
vous Weakness, "Early Decay, Diseases
of tlio l iinurv and Seminal Organs, and
the wholo train of disorders brought on
by baneful and vicious bubits. Great num
bers have been eurod by this noble reme
dy. Prompted by a desire, to benefit the
aillicted and unfortunate, I will seud the
recipe for preparing and using this medi
ciiu, in asealud envalopo, to aiiv one who
needs it, free of charge. Juskpu T. Iksan.
Station D, Bible House, N. Y. City. 80-4t
A Week fcalary X Young
V men wanted as local and travel
ling salesmen. Adress (with stamp) It. II.
Walkkb, 34 Park How, N. Y. 30-lt
AGENTS WANTED FOR
Hon. Win. SEWARD'S GRAND TOTK
of Mexico. Adventure and Kight-sooing
in
"Our Sister Repuqlio."
Is a work of rare merit' profusely illustra
ted. Send for pirtnilsrs to Columbian Hook
i Company, Hartford, Ct. i'S-3t
X t i
that Right makes Might t and ia that Faith let us to the end,
XiljL:xiIOiJLJJLAy.LL.-U.A.U .. hi.vl-- . : i
, , TIONESTA, PA., TUESDAY, DECEMBER 6, 1870.
A MAN VrVITH TWENTY WIVES.
' A Mormon Romance! . " '
CIIAPTKR I.-THE MORMON'S DEFAKTURR
llio morning on which Reginald
Gloverson was to leave Great Salt
Lake City with a mule train, dawned
beautifully. . '
Reginald Gloverson was a young
and thrifty Mormon, with an interest
family of twenty young and handiome
wives. , ,
Ills unions had never beeu blessed
with children. As often as once a year
he used to go to Omaha, in Nebraska,
with a mule train for goods, but al
though he had performed tho rather
perilous journey many times with en
tire safety, his heart was particularly
sad on this morning, and filled with
gloomy forebodings. . . ;.
The time for his departure had ar
rived the high-spirited mules were at
tho door, impatiently champing their
bits, i The Mormoq stood sadly among
his weeping wives.
."Dearest ones,'' ho said "I am sin
gularly sad at heart' this morning; but
do not let this depress you. .. The jour
ney is a perilous one, but, pshaw ! I
have always como back safely hereto
fore, and why should I fear? Besides,
I know that every night, as I lay down
on the broad starlit prarie, your faces
will corao to -me in my dreams and
make mo slumber sweet nnd gentle.
You, Emily, with your mild blue eyes,
and you, Henrietta, with your spleu-.
did black hair; and jtou, Nelly, with
your hairdo brightly beautiful golden;
and you, Mollio, with your cheeks so
downy; and you, Betsy, with your
with your that is to say, Susan, with
your and the other thirteen of you,
each so good and beautiful, will come
to nie in sweet dreams, will you not
dearests? .
"Our own," they lovingly chimed,
;'wo will ?" .
"And so farewell!" cried Reginald.
"Come to my arms, my own !" ho said,
"thrft is as many of you as can do it
conveniently at once, for I must
away." . . . , ,
But he had not gone far, when the
off hind mule became uuhitched. Dis
mounting, ho essayed to adjust the
trace ; but ere he had fairly commenc
ed tho task, the moje, a singularly re
factory animal, snorted wildly nnd
kicked Reginald frightfully in the
stomach. He arose with difficulty and
tottered feebly towards his mother's
house, which was near byy falling dead
in her yard, with the remark, "Dear
mother, I have come home to die !"
"So I see," she said; "where's tho
mules?"
Alas! Reginald could give her
no. answer. In vain the heart-stricken
mother threw herself upon his inani
mate form, carying ;
"Oh, my son my son! only tell
me where the mules are, and then you
may die if you want to."
In vain in , vain ! Reginald had
passed over.
CHAPTER II. FUNERAL TRAPPINGS.
The mules were never found. '
Reginald's heart-broken mother
took the body home to her unfortunate
son's widows. But before her arrival,
she indiscreetly sent a boy to burst the
news gently to his afllicted wives,
which he did by informing them, in a
hoarse whisper, "that their old man
had gone iu."
The wives felt very badly indeed.
"He was devoted .to nie," sobbed
Emily.' , .
. "And to me," said Maria.
"Yes," said Emily, "he thought con
siderable of you, but not so much as
he did of me."
"I say he did r 1 ' "
"I say he didn't!"
"He did!"
"He didn't!",.
"Don't look at roe with your squint
eyes !"
"Don't shake your red head at me!"
t "SibterS," said the black haired Hen
rietta, "cease this unseemingly wrang
ling. I, as-his tirst wife, shall strew
flowers on his grave."
"No you wou't," said Susan. "I as
his last wife, shall Btrewowers on his
grave. It's my business to strew."
"You ehant so there!" said Henri
etta. "You bet I will," said Susan with a
tear-sufluscd cheek.
1
I- 1
"Well, as for, me," said the practi
cal Betsy, ''I ain't on the strew, much
but, I shall ride at the head of the fu
neral procession."
. "Not if I have been introduced to
myself, you won't," Said the golden
haired Nc!ly,"that's my position. Yon
bet your bonnet strings its." ;
"Children," said Reginald's mother,
"you must do some crying, you know
on the day ojf the funeral; and how
many pockcthandkercheis will it take
to go round 1 Betsey, you and Nelly
ought to make one do between you.".
"I'll tear her eyes out, if she perpe
trates a sob on my handkerchief!" said
Nelly. -
"Dear daughter-in-law," said Regi
nald's mother, '"how unseeming is that
anger. Mules is five hundred dollars
s span, and every identical mule my
poor boy had has been gobbled up by
the red men. I knew when my Regi
nald staggered into the door-yard that
ho was on the Die, but had I only
tliuok to ask him aWot them mules
ere his gentle spirit took its flight, it
would have been four thousand dollars
in your pockets. You have never felt
a parents feelings." '
"Its nn oversight," sobbed Maria.
"Do not blame us."
CHAPTER III. DUST TO DUST,
The funeral passed off iu a very
pleasant manner, nothing occuring to
mar the harmony of the occasion. , By
a happy thought of Reginald's mother
the wives waled to the grave twenty
abreast, which rendered that part of
the ceremony thoroughly impartial.
! That night the twenty wives with
heavy hearts sought their twenty re
spective couches.
Iu another house not mnny ' leagues
from the house of mourning, a gray
haired woman was weeping passionate-
'He died,' she cried, 'he died, with
out signerfying, in any respect, where
them mules went to!'
CHAPTER IV. MARRIED AGAIN.
Two years elapse between the third
and fourth chapters, A manly Mor-'
mon one eveuing, as the sun was pre
paring to set among a selec assortment
of gold ami crimson clouds iu the west
ern horizon although for that matter
tho sun has a right to 'set' whero it
wants to, a .id so, I may add, has a hen
a manly Mormon, I say, topped at
the door of the mansion of tho Regi
nald Gloverson.
The door is opened by Mrs. Susan
Gloverson. '
"Is this the house of widow Glover
son ?". tho Mormon asked.
"It is," said Susan.
"And how many is there of she?'
inquired the Mormon.
"There is about twenty of her, in
cluding me," returned Susan.
"Can I see her?"
"You can."
"Madame," he softly said, address
ing the twenty . disconsolate widows,
"I've seen part of you before. And
although I've had twenty-five wives,
whom I respect and care for, I can
truly say that I never felt love's holy
thrill till I saw thee! Be mine! be
minel" he enthutaastically cried, "and
we will show the world a striking illus
tration of the beauty and truth of the
noble lines, ouly a good deal more so
"Twenty-one souls with a single thought,
Twonty-one hearts that beat as one."
They were united they were.
Trinidad ( Col.) Enterprise,
Despair. If thre is anything that
will kill a man, it is depair. It has
nerved the poor victin to steady the
knife on its way to his heart, . to the
core of life. It has flung the proud
woman who stood in her beauty and
loveliness, where before life was worth
living, into the filthy throng to be
trampled on, and a filthy thing her
self, an outcast from human love, a
poor wanderer from tho love of God.
Men and women are among us, on eve
ry side of us, who take our hand and
speak a passing word, but they do not
live life; they live instead, an awful,
ever-dying death. . Hope is gone, und
they word as the clock works, work as
a machine. Turn not too coldly, proud
fortune, from a fairer one who has fal
leu at yonr feet sho was better than
yon once she stood up longer than
you could have done tho is your sis
ter she is God, '
- 'I i e.. . 1 :
dare u our duty as we understand it"--LINCOLN.
: : : : :
A Murderer's Unconcern.
From the Syracuse ( X. Y.) Courier.
Walter Graham killed Samuel Otto
in Wayne county. He left the. body
when the deed was done, and went to
a lawyor in the village of Wolcott and
had a paper drawn up which set fourth
an agreement between Olto and Gra
ham leasing a farm owned by Otto to
the latter. He also drew up a receipt
and forged Otto's name thereto, pur
porting to show that he had paid Otto
$700, ami then returned home,, inform
ed the neighbors of the murder, went
with them to the place where the body
lay, and, after assisting them in bring
ing it home, gave himself up to the
proper authorities. On bis introduc
tion into the county jail, he was un
concerned as to what he had done, and
as to what the result would be. With
but few exceptions, from that time to
the present, when asked why ho com
mitted the crime, he bos replied that
it was done in self-defense, and in a
moment of anger ; that Otto threw au
axe at him first, and; that he killed
Otto by throwing the same iu return.
He was tried and convicted last
Friday. When asked if he had any
thing to say, he rose, and said: "1
want to say, there are some things they
(the witnesses) said, that I didn't men
tion. They said I said 'I meant to kill
him.' That is the Bible truth a thing
I never iaid to any one. I never told
I meant to kill him. I done it in self
defense, and I want nil to understand,
that I have prepared myself, and that
I wouldn't flip a cent any way whether
I live or die. They have to answer
for all these things at the judgment of
God. I ain't got to answer for them ;
I answer for myself, and that is the
truth. I know I have friends I have
to leave, but for all that I hope I may
meet them in that place, and shall be
forgiven for all I have done."
Judge Dwight then addressed the
prisoner, and sentenced him to be
hanged on the 21st of December.
Douglass' Estimate of Clay.
Donn Tiatt gives the following as
Stephen A. Couglass' estimate of Hen
ry Clay :
He was a consummate actor, not so
honest as Tom Benton, nor, in my opin
ion, so able. Tom had not old Harry's
trick of oratory, but he had most
Statesmanlike views, and he was dead
in earnest. Old Bullion believed in
the constitution .and Tom Benton.
Henry Clay believed in nothing. I
have no doubt but that he used to
laugh in his sleeves at his Great
American System, as he called the tar
iff, and wonder how men could be
gulled by su:ih stuff. He swore like a
trooper, drank to excess, and was pas
sionately fond of gambling. He was
the most dangerous person for a young
man to know, for he made these vices
respectable. To this day they swell
up in the South and say, "Be God" be
cuuse the great Harry would swell up
and say "Be God." He gambled ia his
rooms, and shrewd observers used to
say that he used his fucinating pow
ers of Conversation to win his adver
sary's attention from his cards or, if
a young man, would awe him with ut
ter confusion.
Ida Lewis.
A correspondent wonders how Ida
Lewis can handle the oars with such
power. She weighs only one hundred
pounds, is thin and not at all the per
sonage the popular notion has made
of her. Her hands, it is said.arc large,
her feet ditto, and what is not very
pretty ia a heroine whose name has
been enshrined in song, she does not
show mueh respect for Lindly Murray.
But then ahe performed a gallant act,
and the people houoi gallantry wher
ever tboj find it. By tlio way, Ida
was a mother at that time of her re
cent marrlago a mother and not a
w idow. A certain captain in the navy
was the lover of the light-house keep
er's daughter when he wore the uniform
of a mid-shipman.
The late James T. Brady once re
marked that his experience convinced
him that a man's wife was bis best law.
yer.
The peoplo of Spriugfield, Mass., '
felt another shock on Sunday morning,
which they supposed to bo that of an .
earthquake.
$2 PER ANNUM.
Beauties of Insurance.
A Calfornia etter-writcr thus gives
his experience of insurance:
"Insurance is a nice thing a beau
tiful system. I tried it once ; insured
a vessel,, She' got knocked Into
"smithereens ;" had her repaired under
tho eye of their agent. On settlement
they treated mo to a treatise on "jct
om," "flotaom," "general average,"
"navigation,"' atld several other scien
ces. A broker rendered a beautiful
document, all figured over and ruled
in red ink, and we settled. They first
charged me what I had paid for re
pairs, then charged it back to the ves
sel then charged the vessel the dif
ference between what she then was
and formerly was not then deducted
what she ought to have been charged
me back the insurance I had paid,
and having by some error a small bal
ance in my favor, they gave that to the
broker for making out the papers. Not
being a scientific mathematician.
took the document home and figured all
day on it, nnd tho result stood thus: I
had been allowed the privilege of re
pairing my own vessel at my own cost
to pay two notes not half due, and
put $75 in Broker Jones' pocket for
the concoction of all the mysteries ofj
Daboll simmered down in red ink, and
tied up very tastily with green ribbons.
It is a very pretty thing I have it yet;
and If I am ever sentenced to solitary
confinement in Siug Sing, I want the
privilege of taking the document with
me. In ten or fifteen years I might
begin to comprehend it. You re some
on figuere, Jones, you are."
The Bad Habits of Choirs.'
The New York Examiner thus des
cribes a "fashionable choir:" . "The
choir loft ten feet behiud and the feet
above the worshippers ; then the four
teen sorts of tune books; then the bal
ustrade to hide tho praisers ; then the
praiscrs themselves, who como tripping
to their places with exuberant satisfac
tion and demonstrative delight; then
their salutious and greeting, which iu
any other part of tho church would be
considered intocrably irreverent( there
fore tho choir loft is not recognized as
a part of the church, or the inhabit
ants a part of the worshippers ;) then
titter, a disease which is as incurable
in choirs as it is inseparable from them;
then solemn singing with a background
of merry smiles, hilarious nudging and
characteristic (not to say choristic
winks; then a grand reconnoiteringof
tune-books, accompanied by appropri
ate whispers, during the player or the
reading of the Hcly Bible; then a lit
erary entertainment,or an exchange of
penciled notes on all thd great ques
tions that interest the human mind-
excepting religion ; then the transfor
mation of the choir into a sleeping car,
of which tho chorister is conductor,
who wakes up his passengers when it is
time to go to praising again.
One dark night not long ago, a
burglar entered a private house iu
Sixth avenue. On ascending one flight
of stairs he observed a light in a cham
ber, and while hesitating what to do, a
large woman suddenly descended upon
him, seized him by the throat, forced
him down through the hall, and push
ed him into the street before ho had
time to think. "Heroic repulse of a
burgular by a woman," was the way
the story appeared in the papers next
day. But when friends called and
congratulated her upon her courago,
she exclaimed, "Goodness gracious ! I
I didn't know, it was a burglar. If
I had, (should beeu frightened half to
death. I thought it wad my husband
como homo drunk again, aud I was de
termined ho shouldn't stay iu tho house
in that condition."
Some young men talk about luck.
Good luck is to get up at six o'clock
in the morning. Good luck,, 'if you
huvo only a ihilling acweek Is to live
on eleven pence and save a penny.
Good luck is to trouble your4hcad with
your own aud let others' business aloue.
Good luck is, fulfill the commandments,
do unto other peoplo as we wish them
to do unto us. We must plod and per
severe. Pence must be taken care 'ojf
because they are the seeds of guineas.
To ''get on in the world," we nrust
take care of home, sweep our own
doorways clean, try to help other peo
ple, avoid temptations, and have faith
in truth and God.
Ratoiof 2 Advertising.
One Square (I Inch,) one insertion $1 r4
uno wquare " one mouth...... 8 00
OneSuuare " three months. ..SA 00
One Square " one year 10 00
Two MqusroB, one year .....15 00
Quarter Col. " SO OS
Half " " SO 00
One " " 100 00
Business Cards, not exceeding one IncJi
In length, $10 per year. , ' '
Legal notices at established rates. . . .
These rates are low, and no deviation
vl)l bo made, or discrimination among;
patrons. Tho rates offered are such, t
will make it to the advhntattjof men dob
business in the limits of the circulation of
the paper to advertise liberally.
The.Raffle of a Belle.'
J -
'. Considerable excitement was created
among the young unmarried men of
Jfew York last week by an annouce
ment which appeared in the Comma
rial Ad verl wr.to the eftect that on a cer
tain evening a beautiful heiress was to
bo rallied away to some lucky swain
at the Fair which was then being held
for the benefit of the Foundlirg
Asylum. , The reason given for this ap
parent sacrifice was that the young
lady in question considered marriage
a lottery at best, and sho was as will
ing to be disposed of at a raffle as any
other way. The prospect of having a
chance to obtain a wealthy wife by in
vesting five dollars proved an irresisti
ble attraction to those of the male sex
whose affections were unplaced, and
whose pockets were not overburdened
with superfluous funds. Accordingly,
on the appointed evening, the Fair was
thronged with galaxy of brilliant
but impecunious young men, each with
the requisite amount for a single
chance at least in this lottery which'
was to confer on some favorite of for
tune not only a wife, but abundant
means for the support of herself and
husband.
But alas" for human expectations !
It was all a mistake a cruel, harrow
ing joke !. Marriage may bo a lottery
in the opinion of many young and at
tractive heiresses, but the ono who
was willing to be disposed of at a raf
flo was not to be found. Heiresses
must bo wooed as well as their less
pretensions sisters, and those who 'as
pire to win the bands of the wealthy
and beautiful; must still expect that
parents nnd guardians rU not be as
particular as ever before in examining
their bank accounts aiid financial pros
pects, and yet a beautiful and elegant
ly dressed belle was raffled ofT accord
ding to annoucemcnt, but though her .
attire was costly, her beauty was all
waxen, and wealth did not exceed her -market
value ns a doll.
It is but fair to state that this' inno
cent joke, which was, nevertheless, the
means of stirring up the smouldering
fire of love in many a manly breast,
was perpetrated by a well known
journalist, and not by the ladies of tho
Fair, who were as innocent of it as
any of the puzzled beaux, who, how
ever, were as thoroughly sold thereby
as the waxon belle which summoned
them from their clubs aud evening en
tertainments. A young lady who sometimes in
dulges her wit, " without regard to
expense" of feeling on the part of
those at whom the barbed darts aro
burled, recently asked our village dry
goods clerk this question : " Why is
your moustache like a black hair!"
He blushingly gave it up when the
answer, sharp and rather starical,
caused him to blush still more : "Be
cause it's all dotcn I"
A young man at San Francisco,
finding that the object of his heart's
dearest affection would not listen to a
proposition of marriage, procured an
old pistol, which he fulled with powder
and paper, and discharged it at her,
with the view of winning her over U
his way of thinking; but the young
lady took it as a geuuine attempt to
murder her, and had him committed'
to await thn action of the Grand Jury.
"Mother said a little shaver the
other day, '1 know what I "Would do
if I was at sea, and the men were all
starving aiid they should draw lots to
see who should be killed aud eaten,
and it should be me I'd jump into
tho water." "But," said the mother,
"they would fish you up." "No," said
ho, "for I wouldn't bite."
A Western editor accused another'
of having stole his report at a meeting
w hich was recognized by certain ear
marks. The 1 tort courteous is that
the first editor should tie his ears over
tli top 6f his head whilo writing to'
kecy jliem out of the ink bottle."
A L
An Alhituy girl wat&.tn kuow
wlwsther the woman's riliU movements
Includes .Upright to do" tho courting.
If it doc ebe iu fuvor of it ; as the
young men iu her vicinity are bashful.
Mark Twain says that the Sand- - ,
wich Island dish of plain dog "is ou!j r
tho cherished American snunajj-with
the mystery removed. ' "'"