erset Herald'.
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FARX AID VIEWS.
publication
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honied Pa.
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Sl-? .J. A',
-jtti . .t.LAW'.
i" -
SOUieTKJl, Pa.
it
isouicrel. Pa.
'.uBt, up .nun-
Somen!. Pa.
ft
..-i0b.Nt.-Al-i.W.
SoUientcl, Pa.
: twr, Court
'l:iuUi:V-AT-LAT.
buuitrett Pa.
I ASiKV-AT-LAW.
bouicfbct, ra.
i
J. G. OuLE.
-J i 'i.iiviO.r.iS-Ar-LAW,
Swiuencl, ra.
-M!ri''J" -
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L-vIHaV.
A.. L. G. HAY.
!:EAY, .
buiucrM-t, Pa.
4X.ut!!V-AT-LAr.
boiuurbct. Pa.
la. uc luoei ou coUeO-
i EMMEL,
A. a. 1 -AT-LA W,
tsjmenfct, Pa.
r.
4 iliiilts eiu
f kujduuut omuLa, witu
t a..: tjra; . oaioc on Aiaa. vroa
i
ii
Allut V-AI-LA W
LaaMb Block, op re. tn-
(s kUeuol lu lUi prwuipuwai
t-:E5. L. C. COLBOBJi.
iS COLBOKX,
Ar:ji t i o-a i-LiV,
bouieraet. Pa.
KEtnj5d to our cre will be
a Aiirtriu ikiid couvgii''im
EAEE.
ATIUKSEY-AT-LAW,
bometiKt, Pa.
- w i bomerse. and a-ltolnlce
1 bbvc. Miirukled U turn Wlii
rajTH. W. Ii. KL'PPKU
-'TH RUPPEL,
Al i OCJS 1 1 S-A l -LA w ,
Suiueniet, Pa.
aaacrf to tbeir c&re will lc
i fMiati.y Attended to. Office
SilDEX, M. D.,
"B1S.U.VN kud fel KoKuN,
pjuieni. Pa.
.a K.vrii to me t-rv of tlie
BROTHERS. M. D.,
filaian S Ai SLIiUEOJf,
tSuiuentet, Pa.
'Baeaa .
SHAi FEK,
faislLUi; aJj Sl'RGEOS,
Somerset, Pa.
l"imAl fc-mrrt to the cili-
eisiUXS AjiUbCEaEOS.
IR-tel, nwu! lruE .lure.
KBIMELL,
i2'A! .enriew to the ciU-
Wl Oi UlAaKlUO.
OllLLEX,
MJl IUKU,
5FLUCK
. Lanj Surveyor
NATIVE MUTUAL FIRE
ctKLI.V, PA.
f4 actual cost by lusur-
J"- e insure Town aud
" rit for in formation.
JA J. J. ZOBN,
Secretary.
I kT""w. retin a
t lU u b-n refurnikhMl
I ' t.. . ' """ni iii)briv-tnt-ia
"lu-, -"s-nirtii ul John
iuiT. .r?w' Tin-put
j i-aonunirtii Urn 1
jn Mun-ay.
r and Embalrner.
OD HEARSE,
Jit,
to forau fura-
y
r
? J a..
if
V I 1
Pa!
1 lie
VOL. XLVU. NO.
4'
6 need not lose flesh in immt i
rf you use the proper means
3 to prevent it You think
5 you can't take SCOTTS f
EMULSION in hot weather, J
J but you can take it and di-
3 gest it as well in summer as J
J in winter. It is not like the
ft plain cod-liver oil, which is J
difficult to take at any time..
3 If vou are losing fWh i
J you are losing ground and
f you need
, o ;
I Scott's Emulsion
e and must have it to keep up
your flesh and strength. If
9 you have been taking it and t
prospering on it, don't fail to :
ft continue until you are thor-
9 oughly strong and well. c
f SCOTT & BOWKF., Chemists, Stv York. 5
'fe; V j -fej V y y
First Naiipnal Bani
Somerset, JPenn'a.
Capital, S50.000.
Surplus, 537,000.
PROFITS 0OUOUa
ocpo.it. accrivr in iaoqc inoiiali
AMOUNTS. PAYABLE Oft CCMANO
ACCOUNTS Or .IRCHtNTt, ftKMIKI,
STOCK DCALCRS. AND OTHERS SOLICITED
-DISCOUNTS DAILY. -
BOARD OF DIRECTORS.
CrUH. U. Si l -LU UKO. K.
JAMW Lu HHiU, W. H. M1LLKK,
jutiN k. Krr. ttour. . scuix,
KKU "V. HltlSKC'KER
EDWARD SCULL. : : PRESIDENT
VALK.NTINK KAY. : VICE PKESII'KNT.
HaKVEY M. BliKKLEY, tAiHittt.
Tb ftiDlK and secnrltie. of tht tni ar m
eurely protected iu ci-lcbratc-d Coki.ik Bcb-ei-AB
Pkook SArc Tue ouly aJ cukle atwo
lulciT burKlar-proot.
Jacob D. Swank,
Wetohmaker and Jeweler,
Next Door West of Lutheran Church,
Somerset, - Pa.
I Am Now
prepared to supply the public
with Clocks, Watches, and Jew
elry of all dffcriptlona, aa Cheap
a the Cheapest.
IlEPAIUIXG A
SPECIALTY.
All work guaranteed. Look at my
stock before making your
purchases.
J. D. SWANK.
KEFFER'S HEW SHOE STORE!
KEN'S BOYS'. WOKEN'S, GIRLS' ad CHiLOREH'S
SHOES, OXFORDS tai SLIPPERS.
ISlat-k aud Tan. LatdStylasaodMiapes
at lowest
.CASH PRICES
Adjoining Mrs. A. E. Uhl, South-ast
corner of square.
SOMERSET, PA.
Elcivl most soflly nad
4 play most ci u-cln cly over
bv vvaica caudles.
'The Uht iLtt l.tij.bui.s J
be-i.it s cu-irtn, iiatpts itc
finis'.ied touch to U-t lin.wit R
rootn or dining roc-m, is the
V mcllo clow ot
!- t 3 Li 3 1 m M
W E 1 X B
iy5X CANDLES
sJ,l in all colors and riiikic
to harmonize with any interior
haneines or dtcoratiocs.
annfarturea tj
STANDARD OIV CO. -5
or le evrrv n-r. " mji
on Trfti cation
r. bMAovtSt i. W. B KrtiwU
CEKTRU. STATE SKIUL SSW03L
LACK BATES tCUmum O). PA.
Btnnc toenftr. Trt4 ww ro lTTp
.;.i-rt. la l.botrr "
uav bHnBl Uo.idio. 'r' 01-
tifMrksoinl IB Mo.c,SDrtbB,Tj
Aa.l kuwi. r. rn.ni.
BO YEARS'
EXPERIENCE
Trade Manna
Designs
rfl fli Coa'TRIftHTS c
scfenfific America.
A bin""" I7!r."i t-wirt i
. ... wi. T .umI rtr.
w-r : T-r wa.iiL4j, a?w - - - w ,
i !
. Elcivl most soflly nad Vi
f v-i pUv r-iost ci tvcU c!y over
.. J
i
w I
52.
MY UTILE MAS.
I like u watch little uiau
Cuuie romping lu from :y.
With utrnct ey aud clterk of tan.
With wlaxoiae, vitchlug way.
I like to hare lilm cuddle down
I'pon my arm hi hi4.
And whoa be1. o(T to tln-p-towii.
To so Un aafe in bed,
I like to bear my little but a
Go aiugiUK through the ball.
Or making all the nolu be can
With whistle, bat and ball.
There'a tuunic la bin flyluj feet,
Ilealam. the kitchen door.
But every ouod U paMlnc swet,'
My liUie man of four.
But bct I lo-e my little mau
On -Sunday In the pew.
With ruche and ruffle ph-k and upan,
And eye. to clar and ti ue.
No niatwr what the text may be,
Or what the form of rmtv,
bince more than chutvh or creed for me
Is iu bin childish fuce.
A HEADSTRONG MAX.
"Isu't it ijueer how small the woild
is, after ali ? said the shorter of the two
men, aa they b tee red each other dowu
the aihle of tho suioker, while the cur
seemed to be doing its best to jolt them
both over the shoulders of other paa
aengera in the seats. "I'ru always ruu
ning intowmebody I have not seen for
a long time. Now, ho would have
thought of meeting you coming into
this fcinoktr in this section of the
country ?"
"Yea," said the taller he with the
new tweed traveling cap "but then
the world is big enough to keep old ac
quaintances like us apart. Iet'a ait
down here apart for years. How
many years is it?"
"Must be good ten," said tbe first
speaker, a dark, wiry ruau, with small
side wit-kers.
"Quite that I hadn't heard of you
for quite a long while when Scobtl
told tue about that desperate love aflair
of yours and that was "
"Ha, ha! Yes, that was more than
four years ago. Did Scobel ever tell
you the eud of that ?"
"Xo."
"Have a cigar?'' The small man
wriggled his neck with an air of com
plete Belf-satb-faction. "Well, I don't
mind telling you, knowing that it
won't go any further."
"Of course, that's understood."
"I don't mind teiliug you that I al
ways thought myself well out of that
affair."
Yes?"
Yes. You see, she went away from
Galena one summer to spend some
time at a small watering place where
an aunt of hers was staying. Of course
we kept up a correspondence very
sweet and all that, you know but all
of a sudden the letters stopped. Well,
I didn't know what to make of that.
Just as I was beginning to get fidgety
a letter came from her, telling me that
she had met with a frightful accident,
had slipped from a limb of a tree into
a creek. It so happened that some fel
low waa standing near, fishing, and
this maa managed to crawl out on the
same limb cf the tree, just as she was
losing her hold. Oh, perhaps Scobel
told you all that V
"Xo," said the other man looking at
the ash of his cigar. "Scobel, didn't
tell me that. I was only smiling at
the thought of how much alike all of
these romantic rescues are."
Oh, yes, all alike, you know. And
so far as I can make out, this fellow
didn't do anything particularly brave,
either. Just held his hand out to her
and pulled her in. Anybody could do
that, you kuow."
How did he get her T' the man with
the tweed cap asked.
'Climbed out on the limb, I believe.
Well, then there was some tort or
mystery about the man for some days.
He didn't tell his name and she didn't
Ond it out until after she got welL But
you see, Trappes, I did not care to have
my fiance writing to me every day
about some other fellow I didn't
know."
"Of course not," said Trapr8-
"80 I very soon took an opportunity
to request her to to just drop that hero
of tbe limb. Told her I didn't want to
kuow his name, even if she did find it
out"
"And that put an end to your affair,
did it?"
"That? Oh, no. That was only
the beginning of tbe end, as it were."
Here the smaller mau his name was
Bradley seemed to fall into a retro
spective reverie, ana 1 rap pes respect
ed his feelings by smoking ant. study
ing his cigar ash In silence.
You kuow, Trappes," JJradiey at
last resumed, "there's no quesuon
about it. Eloise Miss Jenniugs was
. rorv nice irirl at that time. But ahe
was very young."
- - j ws
Trappes nodded gravely.
"She must have been," he said, "to
tn.4m hv what Scobel told me. 100
j e- -
always were a man or some taste, craa
lev."
"Yes, that's all right," said crauiey.
"Prttv and all that. I wonder if she
is still as graceful as she was."
I should think so, quite," said
Traopes. "Ear wnat aia you say r
.... . - a . A
rv. I lidu't uuite catch if- This road
w u, .
seems very bidly ballasted."
"But there's one point that I've at
wsvs nut m V foot down on," Bradley
continued. "I hold that when a man
takes to hlmtelf a wife it is his to com
mand aud hers to obey."
Trappes nodded his assent
"That was the rock that Eloise and I
split upon. She wrot me rather
huffy letter, telling me she was going
nflnd out this fdllow'a name this
limb man, you know for her own
satisfaction, if not for mine, aud have
him call upon her. Well, that was too
much for me."
"That was rather saucy," Trappes
remarked.
"Oh, yes," said tbe little man, "I
simply wouldn't stand IL I said to my
self, 'if I'm not her master now, I
never will be when we are man and
wife. 80 I wrote and insisted abso
lutely on her not seeing that man
again. You see, I felt that I must rise
to meet the crisis or be forever fallen."
"Quite so," said Trappes. "And the
girl?"
"Well, you know bow women are,
Trappe. I suppose I'm a little bead
strong myself," aaid Bradley, settling
his collar.
(
Somerset
SOMERSET. PA., WEDNESDAY.
"Ye-es," said Trappes. "I confess
that you did Impress me as a little
over-Inclined to have your own way
about things lu general when I first
met yon. Aud you were only a boy
then."
"I can't help it, Trappes. It's my
nature, I suppose. Well, let me tell
you about Eloise"
"You still call her by the first name ?"
asked Trappes.
"Oh, force of habit, you know. I
was going to say, I don't believe Eve
would ever have wanted to touch the
apple if she had'nt been told expressly
to let it alone."
Trappes was still smiling.
"Anyway she insisted that she must
see the man gratitude and all that
and the end of it was "
"You broke it off?"
"Ob, of course the lady must always
have that privilege," said Bradley,
with a courtly smile, "But it ended
right there."
"And you never married at all, did
you, Bradley ?"
"I ?" said Bradley, suddenly pulling
out his watch. "Oh. yes by jinso I
must be getting back. You must let
me introduce you to my wife she's a
spleudid woman a most sensible wo
man. Come on."
Trappes had not quite finished his ci
gar; ueithvr, for that matter, bad Brad
ley. Seeing his friend's sudden enthu
siasm, however, to present him to Mrs.
Bradley, he could not in honor appear
to value the introduction at less than
the worth of a half-smoked cigar.
They rose, and the smaller man drag
ged the larger into the parlor car.
The two had no sooner passed through
the vestibule and closed tbe door be
hind them than a very distinct voice of
low register said:
"Here, where are you going to? I
this what you call five minutes, Deme
trius Bradley?"
"O! That you, dear?" said Bradley,
iu some confusion. "Yes, dear, let m
introduce I met a friend in the smoker
Mr. Trappes."
"Delighted to meet you, Mrs. Brad
ley," he said. "Your husbaud Inter
ested me so in his conversation, Mrs.
Bradley, that we hardly knew how
time w.s Hying."
"Men seldom do when they are in
dulging in tobacco," and Mrs. Bradley
drew herself up to her full height
which was considerable. "Sit down,
please. What was it that Interested
you so?"
The question was addressed to both,
and in a manner that plainly showed
that the two naughty boy? were to be
investigated under the searchlight of
discipline.
Trappes was silent, and only smiled
pleasingly.
"Oil, uothing, dear," said the iron-
willed Bradley, with a look at Trappes
that might have meant either appeal or
reproach.
Trappes had not yet obeyed tbe order
to sit down. He was standing with his
hand on the back of Bradley's chair.
'Mrs. Bradley," he said, "I'm afraid
I must hurry off now to look after some
matters, back here have to change
cars at Indianapolis, you know we are
nearly there see you later."
And Trappes really seejied to antici
pate much pleasure from the future
meeting, for he was smiling in unmis
takable enjoyment as he moved down
tbe aisle.
Bradley sat silent, while the sensible
woman discoursed thus:
"When I say a thing, I mean it You
should follow the same maxim, Deme
trius."
A few minutes later this discourse
was interrupted by the cry, "Indian
apolischange cars for the Vandalla,"
at which Bradley rose.
"Sit still, Demetrius, we don't change
here," said his wife.
Just then a voice behind the culprit's
chair said:
"Isn't this Mr. Bradley V and he
turned to face a remarkably pretty,
flashed, smiling girl.
"It's a long time since we met, Isn't
it ?" and she held out her hand.
"Eloise!" gasped Bradly "I I beg
pardon Miss Jennings!"
"Mrs. Trappes, now," she laughed.
Then as the tall man with tbe tweed
cap came up behind ber, she added:
Let me introduce Mr. Trappes the
man on the limb."
"Oh," Bradleytammered, ;,so pleas
ed to meet, you, Mr. Jennings Mrs.
Eloise."
"Glad to meet Mrs. Elweese,"' said
the sensible Mrs. Bradley, severely ac
knowledging a pleasant bow from the
younger woman.
"All out for the Vandalia!" the con
ductor shouted.
"You don't get out here, Demetrius,"
Mrs. Bradley repeated.
'How how long have you been
married?" Bradley asked, slowly set
tling into his chair.
"Just three weeks," said the young
bride. "So glad to have met you, Mrs.
Bradley. Your husband is quite an old
friend of mine. You must keep a firm
hand on biro; he's dreadfully bead
strong. I wish I had time to teU you,
Urod bye!"
Spain's Greatest Seed.
Mr. R. P. Olivia, of Barcelona, Spain,
spends bis winter at Aiken, S. C.
Weak nerves bad caused severe pains
in tbe back of his bead. On using
Electric Bitters, America's greatest
Blood and Nerve Remedy, all pain
soon left him. He says this grand
medicine ia what his country needs.
All America knows that It cures liver
and kidney trouble, purifies tbe blood,
tones up tbe stomach, strengthens the
nerves, puts vim, vigor and new life
Into every muscle, nerve and organ of
tbe body. If weak, tired or ailing you
need it. Every bottle guaranteed, only
50 cents. Sold at J. N. Snyder's Drug
Store. Somerset, Pa., and G. W. Bral-
lier's Drug Store, Berlin, Pa.
Stranger. StilL
"Of course you are well acquainted
with Shakespeare," said Mr. Dukane,
of Pittsburgh, after an introduction to
Mr. Blossom, president of the St. Louis
Literary Society.
"Shakespeare,?" repeated Mr. Blos
som, thoughtfully. "No, I do not think
that I ever bad the pleasure of meeting
hiui."
E3TBJLISH12r 1827.
The Nailed Board.
Just at this time of year down South
men acting apparently in a strange and
erratic manner are seen about the coun
try lanes and in out-of-the-way planta
tion premises, says the Chicago Inter
Ocean. Sometimes it is only one man
thus encountered an alert-looking per
son, scouring the prospect with eyes
that let nothing escape. Sometimes
there are two or more men together
hovering on the outskirts of cornfield
or cotton patch, scanning things with
wide-awake, comprehensive gaze.
Things that the gunsman and natural
ist aud nature lover would dote on for
people can love uature without regard
to science or dissection are discounted
In their, care for what, after all, seems a
very humdrum quarry when found, a
mere inanimate piece of board or sta
ging, which some carpenter overlooked
when he worked iu that spot, aud
which the strangers pouuee on and ap
propriate as though it were the one
thing above all others worth having.
"What are they goiug to do with
that piece of board?" a.-ks some one
not versed in harvest time annals.
'Shut up some negro's cornhouse
with it," comes the answer. "See,
there's the place, through those trees to
tbe right."
"What are they going to do that
for?"
"Ob, because tbe negro hasn't paid
out, and this is tbe only time of year
when he would be likely to have any
thing to pay out with. Thoee men are
the Sheritl"s Deputies. He has put
them out all over the couutry now.
They will take that board and nail it
acroHs the door of tbe corn bouse, fod
der bouse, or cotton bin, or whatever is
levied on, and, slight as it seems, that
board represents the seal of the law.
Just now, lying on the ground, it was
merely a discarded, weather-beaten
piece of scantling, but once put up
across the door and hammered in place,
it has a vital meaning.
How long will it stay there? Until
the owner of the corn or cotton shows
a disposition to pay the debt, or make
some arrangement in regard to it. May
lie it will be taken down iu two or three
days, may be not for aa many months
or weeks. It depends on circumstan
ces. But however much need or desire
the owner may have to get' into his
barn, or how far out of the way he may
be from the Sheriff, he won't dare to
lay a finger on tbe board. It's a peni
tentiary offense to tamper with it, and
even the most iguorant negro tenant
u nderstanda that There Is tragedy and
comedy, too, abroad in tbe country at
this time of year. May be It's only a
U-grarIy $5 or so that soufliody wants
to collect and takes this summary
means of collection the balance of
payment on a sewing machine, or for
some piece or luruiture or innpery,
bought perhaps a year ago, andwbich
these simple folks iu their inability to
keep a reckoning may have thought
was paid for. Perhaps in reality it was
paid for, and they are being cheated
aud made to pay it over again.
'Sometimes it is a grave matter that
shuts up the cornhouse, relating to the
payment of a mule or a man's farm
lands. It may be that tbe negro has
been caught carrying the crop off by
stealth somewhere else to sell, in place
of paying his landlord or the man who
las furnished supplies and croptuakiug
gear during the year. For whatever
omission or desert, trivial or serious, it
is done, the negroes regard the Sheriff's
visit with awe, and feel themselves dis
graced and outlawed when the talis-
manic board is tacked to their door.
' 'Sam Harley was shut up two years
hand-runniu' gedderin' time,' they say,
with an ominous beadshake and sug
gestive tone. And Sam Harley loses
ca.-te in society until he does something
to make up for the experience.
' 'Zok Happy's a good, square farm
er, there ain t never been no r?ner-
ifTs board tech his cornhouse,' is an op
posite argument And those who, ei-
through misfortune or duplicity, ever
have to wear the brand, feel it keenly."
'Tisn't safe to be a day without Dr.
Thomas' Eclectric Oil in the house.
Never can tell what moment an acci
dent is going to happen.
Useful Hints.
To soften and Remove Putty. Soak
with a little muriatic acid or nitre,
when, in a short time, the putty will
become quite soft, and may be easily
removed with a knife.
To Remove Fruit Stains from Linen
Tablecloths. Well moisten the stains
with kerosene oil, rub thoroughly, cov
er the moist spots with carbonate of
soda, aud leave in the sun to bleach.
To Remove a Tia-ht Ring from tbe
Finger. Hold the band in cold water.
and then apply soap, glycerine, or any
greasy substance that may be handy,
and remove tbe rinir with a circular
movement from tbe fi tiger.
To prevent silver articles from turuT
ing black through the effects of gas and
fog they should be wrapped in tissue
paper and kept in bags made of flannel
or soft baize; that is, if they are not
provided with velvet or lined cases.
Plated goods that are to be put aside
after use should be rubbed with spirits
of ammonia and water, and then rins
ed in clean water; this will keep them
bright and prevent any ill effects should
any salt have been left on the surface
A Harrow Escape.
Thankful words written by Mrs. Ada
E. Hart, Groton, 8. D. "Was taken
w th a bad cold which settled on my
lungs; cough set in and finally terrain
ated in Consumption. Four Doctors
gave me up, saying I could live but a
short time. I gave myself- up to my
Savior, determined if I could not stay
with my friends on earth, I would meet
my absent ones above. My husband
was advised to get Dr. King's New Dis
covery for Consumption, Coughs and
Colds. I gave it a trial, took in all
eight bottles. It has cured me, and
tbank God, I am saved and now a well
and healthy woman." Trial bottle
free at J. N. Snyder'a Drug Store,
Somerset, Pa,, and G. W. Bralllera
Drug Store, Berlin, Pa , large bottles
60 aud $1.00.. ;
JUNE 7. 1899.
The Betreat of the Fliun Insurgents.
From the Pblladet phia Inquirer.
It is interesting to note the gradual
change that is taking place in some of
the Insurgent newspapers of the State.
As county after county has held prima
ries, and as each one in turn has repu
diated Flinnism and Martinlsm the
wise newspapers among those who sup
ported tbe party wreckers are accept
ing tbe inevitable.
The Scranton Republican, which
fought Quay during the legislative ses
sion, is tne latest to realize mat tne
struggle Is hopeless. There is a most
pronounced sentiment in Lackawanna
county for Judge Archibald for the su
preme bench, and the Republican is
using this sentiment to cover its own
flight It deprecates "any exhibition
of local factional feeling in State joIi
tles under existing circumstances," and
urges that "the vital question of Quay
and anti-Quay vhall be relegated to
some future occasion." It acknowl
edge that Q'lay is Iwyond nadi this
year, and "that factional strife Ibis
summer Is worse than uk-Icss."
All this is true enough, aud the Ite-
publican ia to be congratulated upon
discovering the fact that tbe people are
taking no stock iu Fliun and Martin
and the party wreckers aud disorgan
Izers. The Insurgeuts started off the
fight for delegates to the coming State
Convention full of hope and enthusi
asm, but not a single primary have
they won up to date. On Saturday
they lost Fayette county, and it is now
apparent to all that their following in
the convention will require a powerful
microscope to discover.
Itarely has there been such an exhi-
bitii n of Republican sentiment The
Quay question was really fought out in
the legislative districts last November,
ami the desire of the party as express
ed at the iolls was nullified, so fur as
the senatorship was concerned, by the
bolt of Flinu aud Martin, who permit
ted personal spite to get the better of
their loyalty to party. Men who fight
the rule of the majority can not hope
successfully to appeal to the Republican
people. Tbo bolters are finding this
out now that the counties are piling up
their protests against treachery.
Persecution ia not popular in Penn
sylvania, and that is why Flinn and
Martin will have no sympathizers in
the Slate Convention.
Individual Grayity.
In the early part of this century
there lived in Nantucket a young Qua
keress whose w It caused many a ripple
in the demure circle of the Friends.
When this pretty Martha attended
eaily meeting at Newport at tbe age
of IS, her youthful spirits brought her
occasional grave looks from the elders,
although ber real goodness of heart was
never questioned.
Oue evening during the session of
early meeting Martha was the centre
of a group of young people, gathered
near the windows of the parlor in the
boarding-house where some of the
Frieuds lodged for the time. The
oung people were playing the simple
and amusing game of "humorous defi
nitions." Martha's wit caused such
frequent laughter that a solemn-faced
person rose from his seat at the other
end of the room and asked in a loud,
stern voice:
"Martha, can thee give me the defi
nition of gravity?'
The pretty Quakeress colored at this
public and unnecessary rebuke, but af
ter scarcely (lerceptible hesitation, she
answered demurely:
'I am not able to give thee an answer
of my own, Friend Brown, but perhaps
fiat of De la Rxrbefoucauld will suit
thee. He says that 'gravity is a myste
rious carriage of the body, inveuted to
cover the defects of the mind.' "
Youth's Companion.
The Hambld Tramp.
Having discovered that he is a hu
morist County Collector Spratt tells a
new joke every day, ss ys the St Joseph
News. He thought of another one to
day, and gave it as follows, to an ad
miring throng In bis office:
A tramp called at the kitchen door of
a St Joseph residence a few days ago.
He waa ragged, cold and hungry, and
his feet were wrapped in rsgs. When
the hired girl opened the door in an
swer to his knock the scowled. She
did not like tramps.
"If you please, miss," said the tramp.
taking off his old, battered cap, and
making a bow that bad the semblance
of politeness about it "can you give me
a few old, soggy biscuits?"
Tbe request was so unusual that the
hired girl called ber mistress, who hap
pened to be in tbe kitchen at the ti.me
Tbe tramp repeated the request to her,
"Why, what do you want with old
biscuits ?" she asked. ''Wouldn't you
rather have somethiug good to eat?"
'To, ma'am," the tramp replied, "I
want soggy biscuits all I can get of
'em. It is a well-known fact that they
produce dyspepsia, and that dyspepsia
brings on nervousness; anyliody knows
tbat nervous people are ambitious, and
that an ambitious man generally gets
rich. It's wealth I'm after, and I'm
starting at the foot of tbe ladder to
get it"
Working Night and Day.
Tbe busiest and mightiest little thing
that ever was made is Dr. King's New
Life Pills. Every pill is a sugar-coated
globule of health, that changes weak
ness into strength, lUtlessness into en
ergy, brain-fag Into mental power,
They're wonderful in building up the
health. Onlv Zi cents. Sold at J. N
Snyder's Drug Store, Somerset Pa.
and G. W. Bralller's Drug Store, Ber
lin, Pa
All in the Family.
A member of a hard-shell Quaker
family waa beiug trounced, verbally.
for his excessive meanness. The whole
family shared the reputation, and the
member under fire made no defense.
He listened patiently to tbe tirade, aud
when the man wound up by declaring
him the meanest man he had ever met
in bis life, tbe Quaker remarked gen-
' tly: "Ah, but thee lias never met my
' brother Robert!" New York Commer-
'. cial-Advertiser.
ileral
They' say.,
is to be found at ltt-iton, a town on the
Santa Fe Road, and it is kept by "seven
sanctified si.-tcrs," as the proprietors
are popularly called. Several years ago,
says the Chicago Record, a woman in
that place and her husband quarreled
over the btst way of expounding the
Scriptures to a Sunday school class, and
were so stubborn that they separated
and were finally divorced. Tbe family
coutrovt r-y was taken tin by the town,
which was soon distinctly divided be
tween the adherents of the husband
and wite. Tbe result was a large crop
of divorces, and seven husbandless
women, Including the original cause of
the commotion, joined together and
rented the towu hotel. One of them
did the cooking, another was parlor
maid, a third made up the beds, and so
they divided the work among them
and ran the establishment upon the co
operative plan. They would not em
ploy a man about the placf, although
the most of the patrons were men, of
course. Pooplo say that women trav
elers preferred to stop elsewhere, and
that would be a womau's way. One of
the seven "sanctified sisters" used to
drive a big carry-all down to the rail
way station three or four times a day
to meet trains, but she let the regular
transfer company haudle the luggage.
The hotel prospered from tbe begin
ning, and there was no reason why it
should not, for everything was nest
and homelike aud the cooking was the
l-est in Texat, which ia not saying
much, perhaps, but is a god reason
why it was appreciated. Every Sun
day it was crowded. The drummers
used to sw.rm there from all the
northern-central part of the State, and
every passenger ou banta re trains
was an advertising agent Tbe "sanc
tified sisters" made money, as they de
served to do; they eularged their estab
lishment and started a big laundry in
connection with It, where the drum
mers left their soiled clothes to be done
up wmie tney were out uuring tne
week. Then the "sisters" bought a
hotel at Waco and started a laundry
there, with equal success, and now they
are talking of starting one in New
York.
A Few Eecords.
Over the wire Ii. R. Pollock sent 2'.0
words in rive minutes at a telegraph
tournament The claim of faster work
has been made for several.
In typewriting Mr. McGorrin, of
Canada, repeating a single sentence,
reached a speed of 3JQ words a minute.
The mechanism will respond to no
faster touch. In ordinary-corresriond-
enee, jiiss Aiae t urr w rote :rj woros
a minute for five minutes.
Isaac 8. Dement who holds among
dborthand writers the place held by
Mr. MeGurrin among typewriters, took
down -tOO words a minute last year.
In the matter of quail eating, there
have been any number of claimants of
records. A. M. Trautman, of Washing
ton, put away a bird a d ty for thirty
days. Colonel Thornton, 01 Atlanta,
ate a quail a day for twenty-nine days
and ou the thirtieth day ate two. W.
S. Walcott ate two quails a day for
thirty days.
Some years ago Charles Pearsail swal
lowed five dozen soft boiled eggs per
day for six consecutive days in a New
York restaurant He took thirty eggs
in tbe morulugand thirty in the after
noon. About that time, April, 1M,
theG. A. R. people of Tonawanda, N.
Y., held a bean eating tournament A
Mr. Baker got away with six quarts of
beans in forty minutes.
A War Stamp to Cost $42,500.
The Chicago, Burlington & Qaincy
Railroad Company may have to put a
stamp of f42,o00, under the War Rev
euue law, upon its new refunding mort
gage. The Baltimore Sc. Ohio reorgan
ization is liable to a similar assessment.
The question involved has been re
ferred by the Commissioner of Internal
Revenue to the Attorney General, and
his opinion is expected in a few days.
It seems that the new Revenue law,
as originally passed, required that not
only the mortgage, but the bonus issuea
under a mortgage should be stamped;
but at the last session of Congress this
was amended by a joint resolution pro
viding that where a mortgage secures
bonds but oue stamp should be required
on tbe two instruments, but that tbat
one should be placed upon tbe instru
ment w hich requires tbe higher rate.
For the railroads this is a very seiious
matter, as their mortgages, most of
which are made to secure !ssues of bonds
to be made at some future time, are
usually very large, and far in excess of
the actual bond issue.
Eed Hot From The Gun
Was the ball that hltG. B. Stead man
of Newark, Mich.. In the Civil War.
It caused horrible Ulcers that no treat
ment helped for 3) years. Then Buck
len's Arnica Salve cured him. Cures
Cuts, Bruises, Burns, Bils, Felous,
Corns, Skin Eruptions. Best Pile cure
on earth. " cents a box. Sold at J.
N. Snyder'a Drug Store, Somerset,
Pa., and at O. W. Brallier's Drug
Store, Berlin, Pa.
In Puerto Rico.
English dictionaries are in greater
demand than any other commodity.
More than half of the Puerto Ricans
live on less than five cents a day.
Skilled laborers, such as bricklayers,
carpenters and plumbers, earn 00 cents
a day.
Rents have gone up in San Juan, and
prices of real estate have mounted sky
ward.
"Polygamy exists to a great extent
savs Charles F. Savior. "It is not un
common for one man to have two or
three families."
Until a few weeks ago prisoners wore
shackebt that bad been welded on their
limbs. But General Henry cavt the
trder tbat the shackela should be filed
off and no more cruelty practiced.
Spring tiredness is due to an lmpov
erished condition of the blood and U
cured br Hood's Sarsaparilla. which
enriches the blood.
At 'least forty American lawyers are
endeavoring to tarn a living ia Manila.
Since tb Amt'ricau occupation over
t'W saloons hare laeeu opened In Ma
nila. Montana soldier have found indica
tions of trold while at work, iu the
trenches.
Malolog Ls less than thirty miles from
Manila, yet day after day the American
coIjiuus advauced through towns and
cities with a population of frru 1,000
to 10,000.-
A. Furruan Hedden has established
a monthly magazine known as the
Philippine Monthly. Wood cuts of
sceues of interest iu the Island of Lu
zon are produced, and stories by naval
officers and others are published.
Spanish officers are returning home,
and all have large quantities of native
gold, w bicli they say is pleuliful in the
mountain si reams. Manila American.
The X:; olliccrV wivrs who arrived on
tbo Morgan city were not allowed to
land, as Geix-m) Otis thought be had
women and children enough to protect
A soldier of the Twentieth Kansas
tells this story at the expense of a fellow-soldier:
"When we were sent out
on the firing line Pete Bogan was lying
behind a tree, out of tbe way of bulb-Is.
All at once be yelled out hke a wild
mau: 'Captain, I can not stand these
darned ants biting me all the timer
Zip! A bullet liaised close to his body.
'On second thoughts, Captain,' he yell
ed, 'I can stand thenar "
A Lncky Exchaage.
Lieutenant El ward Lloyd, Jr., of
the cruiser New Orleans, says he never
considered himself lucky until he heard
of the capture of Lieutenant J. C. (Jill
more, of the Yorktown, aud his parly
by the Filipinos. When the Solace
sailed from this port for Manila, says
the New York Times, with a cargo of
ammunition and other supplies on
board. Lieutenant Lloyd was ordered
aboard of her to act as navigator. The
lieutenuot has his own ideas about the
beauties of the Philippine Islands and
of life there. Accordingly be lost no
ti ne in looking around for a substitute
to take bis place.
Lieutenant Gilimore, on the other
baud, was glad of a chance to go, aud
after the uecessary preliminaries were
gone through with the two ofticers ex
changed positions.
"And if it were not for tbat ex
change," said Lieutenant Lloyd. "I
suppose I might now be in the hands
of those yelping Filipinos. There is
o?i!y one eletueut of doubt in the case,"
added the lieutenant. "Gilimore was
transferred to the Yorktown after he
reached Manila. Nevertheless, it gave
me rather a peculiar feeling to read in
the paper that be had been caught by
tliose savages."
Lieutenant Lloyd is on tbe New
Orleans, now in the city of New Or
leans, where the ship will he a centre
of Interest. After her stay there, the
officers expect to receive orders to go to
Manila.
The Persian Carpenter.
In accordance with the invariable
custom of all Eastern artisans, tbe car
penter sits uiu the gnniud when at
work. lustead of a bench, a stroug
stake is driven down before him, leav
ing about ten inches out of the ground,
and upon this he rests his work, and
keep it steady with his feet The fa
cility with which the work is executed
in this position has always been a mat
ter of surprise to European workmen.
In the royal arsen ils English took are
used, and a better system of working
has been introduced under tbe superin
tendence of British officers, but in the
native workshops the workmen are still
to be seen squatting on the ground;
and, b ing used to this position from
infancy, and their tools being formed to
work with more efficiency when used
Iu this way, any Iteraiiou is scarcely
to lie expected. Their principal tools
are the frame saw, adz, planes, bam
mers, nails, and a few smalier tools.
Southern Lumberman.
Pneumatic Leg.
An English inventor has devised a
very ingenious artificial leg and foot in
tended for use in cases of amputation
below the knee joint It is mainly com
posed of a hollow rublier chamber,
which is inflated in exactly tbe same
way as is a bicycle tire. The sReleton
of the foot is of wood and contains
within it a rubber-faced joint which
permits of movements like those which
take place at the ankle.
A pair of rubber pneumatic pads sur
round the end of the amputated limb,
so that no undue pressure is exerted on
the tissue.
The Old Virginia "Auntie" and the
Spring Chicken.
At nearly every station on the Cnesa-
peake A Ohio Railroad in Virginia, says
The Argonaut, picturesque colored men
and women attend tbe trains with trays
of fried chicken, corn bread, boiled
egg", sandwiches, pies and' other re
freshments, crying: "Hyer's spring
chicken, tender and nicer Where do
you get spriug chicken this time of
year? aked a passenger of the vener
able "auntie," one bitter March day.
"You'ns a Nawth'n lady, ain't you,
honey ?" responded the lunch-vender.
with a twinkle ia her eye; "an
Nawth'n ladies ii good to poh kul'd
folks, so you hadn't ought to ask nobody
whar dy gits de spring chickens."
Before Wheeler's Nerve Vitallzer
was discovered epilepsy caused serious
alarm, but not now. It cured Mrs.
Joseph Keller. Converse, Ind., after
she bad spent a thousand dollars in
trying to find a curd. For sale at Gar
man's Drug Store, Berlin, Pa. and
Jlouutaiu & Son's Drug Store, Con
fluence, Pa.
"You are Urn little,' asid the pro
prietor of the toua beauery. "It takes
bigger guy dan you to manage de
mugs dat feed here."
"Ah !' said the applicant for a job,
"I see. N-ne but the brave do serve
the fare here." Indiaaap Uj Jjurail
Weeds aai SoilMsistare-Saasoaable
Hints.
A single weed niAy ap,vreutly do but
little harm, but evry wued tbst oc
cupies space during perijds cf dry
eathar takes tha moisture from a Urge
surrounding surface. One who has
srtveo the matter attention and exper
iment estimates that one p.iund of
weeds will remove .v) pound of water
from tha soil during an ordinary
d.ouht, and that pounds of weed
p-raore ate not an unusual sihtoa
sjine fieMi, the loaa on each arte be
ing 2jO,0X) pouudj of moisture ptr
acre, and this loa m.y be greater if
ttie weeds are well advauced iu growth.
In addition to this deprivation of the
soil of its moisture, weeds draw oil the
fertility and take from the crop tbe
fo d which U so necesisary for its ad
vancement aud success. It is work to
kep down weeds but the labor can be
miteriaily reduced if the w eeds are de
stroyed when they are small, which
al loosens the top soil and prevents
loja of moisture by evaporation. The
cultivator is au implement that should
never be idle at this season.
Better butter can be made on the
farm than at the creamery if the same
care is given. The managers of creaiu
?rie secure the best assistants to br
hd, and they aim to put good butter
on tbe market The advantages pos
sessed by the farmer who makes dairy
butter is that he can feed his cows on
fie best foods, use more care and work
with cleaner surroundings. A large
proportion of creamery butU r is not
uniform, as tbe milk comes from many
sources, but dairy butter is injured in
the churning and manipulation of the
product by inexperienced persons.
Farm yard manure vartw greatly, iu
value depending upou thtj kinds of
foods eaten by animal.', and also upon
lh absorbent m tlerials med in the
heap. One cord of m inure should
weigh about three tons, and should
ontaia about 7 pounds of uitrogeu,
I pound phosphoric acid ami 24
pooud potash. Oue ton is about a
two-horse load. A load of oue ton is
valued at about
Dogs are not always at fault when
they kill sheep. Not one dog iu ten la
fed, and is consequently compelled to
pick up its food wherever it cu be pro
cured. It is at night that such dog
prowl over a neighborhood seeking
food and attack aheeo from necessity.
When the dog discovers a source of
supply it will avail iUelf of the priv
ilege. If dog were given regular meals
at hom they would be less inclined to
forage for food.
At this seasou of the year it is hi pen
sive to be benind witu tne wora, as
double tbe labor -iil be rt-qjired to
catch up. A weed that is left for a day
or two may be larije when its destruc
tion is sought Plan out the work iu
advance, be systematic and aim to
carry out the plans. It is better to be
ahead with all farm operations, so as
fo be ready to perform service ia any
direction where work is niot desirabla.
Once tbe soil is made clean It is easier
to keep it so than to give weeds a
chance to grow.
A a precaution agalust a possible
sbort bay crop sow a plot of corn for
fodder, and also do not overlook millet
the great summer hay crop, which
grows rapidly, gives a large yield, and
is grown with as littIcl.ilor as any
other hay crop. Unitarian .grass is
also another excellent crop, which may
be seeded down now. It may be cut
several times during the season aud
grows so rapidly as to completely kill
all the weeds on the land on which it
is grown.
Now tbat strawberries are falling In
price it is a loss of time a well as ex
pensive to pick and ship the small and
inferior berries. Compel the pickers to
pick only the best and leave those that
.... . .-u r
are und-estrauie, ana tne expense "i
shipments will be redaced and better
prices obtained. The market is never
overstocked with the choicest au.l
there is always a ready sale for tbe best
at good price.
As soon as the early caboags are well
established hoe arouud each plant and
cultivate between the rows. The first
homing will be found to be more bene
ficial than any afur cultivation. It
lets in tbe warmth, holds the moisture
in the soil, destroy young weed, and
gives the plants a good start.
To cultivated crop on a piece of
land is tbe cheapest mode of cleaning
the soil of weeds and grass. Corn aud
potatoes must be cultivated, and where
two year's cultivation is given such
crops the ground will be left In excel
lent condition for a sowed crop, like
wheat The cultivation, however,
must be thorough, for if only partially
done tbe labor will be in vain.
String beans may be now planted,
and as they are very prolific ouly a few
row are necessary to supply a family.
They can be had in succession until
fall by planting at different period.
After tbe early varieties are up p!ant
stringless kinds and pick the pods dai
ly, so as to prevent any from maturing.
The custom of feeding grain only to
poultry is one which is ditti.-ult to
alter. Grass in summer is desirable for
young bird. If a small plot is wired
off for a fl'K-k of chicks that are able
to care for themselves it will be found
that they will pick off tbe grass so close
as to leave the ground hire in a few
days. Grass is the cheapest food tbat
can be allowed in summer, and where
adult fowls and chicks have an unlimit
ed range they will need u other food,
except a I'ght meal of grain at night
to indues them to come to the farm
yard regularly.
Not an "Impatient" at AIL
The nurse on duty in a certain Lon
don hospital was giving the little ones
their last meal for the d.iy. All save
one were patiently waiting their turn
to be served, the one in q lesti q being
a little rosycheeked convalescent, who
wa calling lustily for her portion.
"Aren't you just a little impatient
Dorothy?" inquired the kindly nurse,
with just a little tinge of correction In
her tone. "No I'm not." retorted
Dorothy, promptly; "I'm a little she
patient."
Disappointed.
Sylvia What's the matter? You
look as if you bad lost your last friend.
Maude I went to see a fortune-teller
yesterday aud she told me I was going
to marry a tall, dark man. The only
real rich fellow I know is dumpy, and
has red hair. Chicago Times-Herald.
Good Advice.
"What's the matter, old man?"
"Oh, I've just had a quarrel with
my wife."
"Well, forget and forgive,"
"I never can forgive ber. You see, I
waa in tbe wrong."
"Then in that case demand an apol
ogy T' Harlem Life.
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