The Somerset Herald.
BRAIL1UIO 1827.
3erms of Publication.
rKished very Wednesday mornina; at
i per tnnnm If paid In advance, otherwise
jO will invariably be cliArgeU.
So (.utxioription will be discontinued until
amraff are paid op. Postmasters ne
I acting to ooltQr us when subscribers do not
a,ke out tour paper win ua uauu raapousiDis
orthasabaarlpUon.
8uUerfars ramoTlnc from on poalaBca) to
,n0:Ur should (i v s the name cf the fornv
f - n well as the present omoe. Address
Tuk rJoatcKarr Uiuij),
BOMUUUtT, Fa.
. v T-IIT. Jr.
, AliOU-N t Y A NOTARY PCBLIC.
Somerset, Pa.
tn-
i ilnreCjT. X'i Sip pel.
rFfs 11 MEYEIW,
AT1VK t V-AT-LA W,
i.ui. iu Scott's Boiuernet, Penn'a.
i lluilduif . 2d floor.
,:! tu.inrt entrusted to his care will be at-
turiiil to " lirouipuicaa auu uucmy.
. I i. HAY. C W. WALVKR.
II
f AV & WALKER,
ATTOKN EYS-AT-LA W.
aud N'OTAUY PUBLIC,
honieract. Pa.
oat,ri,tileC'H,rt Uou-
-I'D. B. SCULL,
J-a A
ITuKfcY-AT-LAW,
o. 170 Fourth aL, riUaburj, Pa.
J.
A. BEItKEY,
AUUKJ t X -AT-JLA W ,
Somerset Pa.
Ode above' Flsber'a Book Store.
UAliVEV M. BERKLEY,
AIT UKJS fcY-Ai-LA W,
(somerset, Pa.
Offli In First National Bank.
A.
C. HOLBERT,
Al lUlttl-Ai-lA ,
boiueraet. Pa.
Offl.t In the Cook a BecriU Block, up a Ultra.
i ' EORGE 11. CULL,
AlTolOi fc Y-AT-LAW,
Suiueraet, Pa.
TBED. NY. BIESECKER,
Ari.iKfcY-Af-LAW",
rjouierset. Pa.
See in Printing House Row, opposite Court
Houe.
R. SCOTT,
A ITUUN EY-AT-LAW,
Soiucntet, Pa
17 J. KOOSER,
XI A'iTullN EY-
AT-LAW,
boiiit-rset. Pa.
V. II. KOONTZ. J. G. OtiLE.
KOONTZ fc OGLE,
ATTullM t YS-A T-LA W,
Soluerhft, Pa.
Will five prompt attention to buaincsii eu-ru-t-u
to I bt-ir isn- Ui rsomcrwelauu. adjoiuinc
ouniira. "flicc iu l"riul Uouae Mow, oppoui
be (.uurt liuuse
T7ALEXTIXE HAY,
AnullEV-AI-UW,
!Soiueract, Pa.
Ao Iwaler in Real Estate. Will attend to
a . i .urw. entruled U biacare with prompt
utj auu Qaltrllly
JOHX II. UHL,
AVlulLS EY-AT-LAW,
' tkiiuenset, la-
Will promptly attend to all buwueas eu
fuslcil to In in. uiiey advanced, ou collco
lou, di. Ollii iu Mamuiolh Block.
JOHX O. KIMMEL,
A IXUii EY-AT-LAW,
tsouiemet. Pa.
Will attend to all Imwiim eutruled U hi
ere in Miurm't RUd uujoiiiin cou..t.e, with
(.nunpluesfuud tidelily. UltioKOii aiu cro
Kiwi, above CoUrolu'. tjrocerj' bums.
JAMES L- PLOH,
ATruRN E Y-ATiLA t
Somerset, Pa.
0(T. in Mammoth Block, up Uini. En
trance ou Min t'rotw fctreeU Collectlouil
linn!.-, ekLate wtUcU, utlca ejuniined. and all
l;i buMiHM atUruded to with prompiaena
aud ndeiity.
A. J. COLBORN. L. C COLlloR.V.
CiOLBOUX & COLItOltX,
ATTuRNEYS-AT-LAW,
ISomeroct, Pa.
All bnine entrufcted to our care will be
piMinptiy and Ultiiluiiy attended to. Colleo
tiuuk iiuwle iu e.ouienM'L, Bedford aud adjoiu
lug counties, frurveyiiig aud couveyauciug
doue ou reakouable tcruu.
UL. liAER,
, A1TORNEY-AT-LAW,
Homerset, Pa.
Will practice In Somerset and adjoiuinc
ouutu. All buinej eutruted U him will
receive prompt attention.
A. II. OOFFROTH. W. H. RLPPEL.
OOFFKOTH & RUPPELu
J ATTOR.NEYS-AT-LAW,
Someraet, Pa.
All boiiineso entrunted to their care will be
tpeeUnvand punctually attended to. Office
cj Miu Crox tmrt, opposite Mammoth
JV. CAROTHEIW, M. D.t
PHYSICIAN ASL'RUEO,
Somerset, Pa.
Office on Fairiot Street, oppoKit U. B.
Cliun-b. -
b .ftil calls at office.
DIL P. F. SHAFFER,
PHYSICIAN A Jiu SURGEON,
Somerset, Pa.
Tenders his profestiionaj er lce to the citi
!. of merel and vicinity. Office next
U'jur to Commercial Hotel.
Dli. J. M. LOUTHER,
PHYSICIAN ami SURGEON,
Cffine on Main street, rear of Drug store.
J),, 11.
fcs. KIMMELL,
Tfn.ien, liia nmf.-wional nervier to the citi-
teij i,f Soiin-rM-i and vicinity. I'ulrtw pro
eMiitusillv eiij-'iied be can be lound at hia of
fice ou Main .-l Eat of Lnaiiiond.
Dli. J. KMcMILLEX,
(Uraduate in lentiiitry.)
'iive special attention to the preservation
oii,e naiural t-'etb. ArtiflcUil etK iimerted.
A;l neratioiii guaranteed aaliiifactory. Oflice
Id t lie rot iu oxer L. H. Iavis A Co"a a to re,
Corner Main CruM aud Patriot street.
C. H. COFFROTH,
Funeral Director.
O.Tu 00G Maiu Crrss St. Residence,
340 Patriot St.
pHAXK R. FLUCK,
Land Sur'ej-or
AMi MINING ENGINEER. Ustle, Pa.
Oils! Oils!
-o-
TaeAt'antle R, fining Co Pittsburg Pepart
Biem, Pittsburg. I'a., makes a specialty of
niaiiufaturiiig for the lhmieaUC
trade the nueat bran da of
Hjminatingdtlubricating Oils
Naphtha & Gasoline,
tkat can be made from rtroleum. We chal
lenge com puriaou with every known
Product of Petroleum
If you wish the most uniformly
Satisfactory Oils
IX THE
American Farket,
for oura. Trade for Somerset aud vicini
ty supplied by
OOOK A BEERITS and
FREAJbE A KOOSEB,
Souieraet, Pa .
nnn
1 lie
VOL. XLIV. NO.
vry5ap
Pure
Try it for just one wash. Ivory Soap "costs a little more,
but it takes less to do the work, "and how much whiter clothes
are when they have been washed with it
Txt PaocTta A CtHU Co.. Cm-n.
THE
First National Bank
Somerset, Penn'a.
o
Capital, S50.000.
Surplus, S22.000.
DCPOaiTS RCCCIVCDIN LARQC ANDBMALL
AMOUNTS, PAYABLE ON DEMAND.
ACCOUNTS OF MERCHANTS, FARMERS,
STOCK DEALERS. AND OTHERS SOLICITED
DISCOUNTS DAILY.
BOARD OF DIRECTORS.
LaRCE . HICKS, GEO. R. 8CCLL,
JA E-S L. Pl'UH, W. II. I LEER,
JOHN K. SVTT, ROBT. S. SCULX,
FRED W. BIESECKER.
EDWARD SCfLL, : : PRESIDENT.
VALENTINE HAY, : VICE PRESIDENT.
HARVEY . BERKLEY, . CASHIER.
The funds and occur! tic of this bank are ae-
curely protected In a celebrated Cokliss Bcs
ua Paoor Sake. The only aafe made abao
lutely burxlar-proof.
The itat Coetj National
BANK
OF SOMERSET PA.
DtaalitM, 1877. Orftabad M Wit !!, 1890
CAPITAL,
$50,000
SURPLUS AND UN-
DIVIDED PROFITS iy,OUU.
O:
Chas. J. Uarrison, - Trcsident.
Win. II. Koontz, - "N ice President
Milton J. Fritts, - - Cashier.
Geo. S. Uarrison, - Ass't Cashier.
1
Directors:
Kam. B. Harrison,
Jotiiah Specht,
John II. Snyder,
Joseph B. Haviis
Win. Kmliiley,
Jonax M. Cook,
John Stuflt,
Nonh S. Miller,
Jerome Stunt,
Harrinon Snyder,
Chas. W. Snyder.
rndnmm of this bank will receive the mottt
liberal treatment conMMent a ith safe tatiiklnic.
Pari lea wishing to aena money eam or wei
in be accommodated by draft for any
amount. ... . . ,
Money ana vaiuanie aecureu iy one o: mr
hold'a celebrated aafcK, with nut Improved
''ojilectlone made In all parU of the United
S til tea. 'harem moderate.
Accoonla and ai-pomta aonc.ieu.
A. H. HUSTON,
Undertaker and Embalmer.
A GOOD HEARSE,
nd everything pertalnine to funerala fum
Uhed. SOMERSET -
Pa
Jacob D. Swank,
Watchmaker and Jeweler,
Next Door West of Lutheran Church,
Somerset, - Pa.
Am Now
prepared to I'l 'y the jtil-Co
with CWUjs W.. , J -elry
of all dewcri .:, Clr
as the Cheaj.
REPAIRING A
SPECIALTY.
All work guaranteed. Ixk at my
atock lufore making your
pun-has1.
J. D. SWANK.
ALWAYS
On Hand.
BEST IN THE MARKET.
Jarecki Phosphate,
Lime,
Crushed Coke,
Hard Coal,
Salisbury Sft Coal,
the Old Stand near the Somer
set fc Cambria IL R. Station.
At
.Prices Right.
Peter Fink
48.
MrsAE.Uhl.
JVJEW SPRING GOODS. Ncw-
A ' est styles in all kinds of
goods and low est prices. A full
line of Cashmere and Serges in all
qualities. Splendid assortment of
Black Wool, Worsted and Maliair
Dress in Brocaded and Novelty.
Styles, suited for dresses and skirts
A big stock of newest styles of
Novelty Dress Goods, ranging in
price from 12 1-2 cts to $1 a yard.
GREAT variety of Silks and
Silk and Wool Plaids, Ac., for
waists fc dresses. Wash Good3 for
desses and waists, including Swisses,
Lawns, Percales, Dimities, Crepes,
Moire, Chintzes, Cheviotte Prints,
Ginghams, Seersuckers, tc. Splend
id values in Table Linens, Towebi,
Napkins, Table Cqvc-s, Red
Spreads, Tortiers, Furniture Da
mask Silk and Silkoline Drajteries
and Cushions.
LADIES' Dress Skirts and Shirt
Waists. Ladies1 Spring Capes
in Velvet, Silk and Cloth. Ladies'
Night Dresses" Corset Covers, Skirts
and Chemise. A handsome assort
ment of New Lace Collars and
Dress Yokes. Infants Long and
Short Dresses, Long and Short
Coats and Sacks. Great variety of
Children's Mull and Lace Caps and
Hats.
NEW Style Buttons, Silk?,Gimps,
Ribbons, Laces, Ac, for dress
trimmings. A large variety of
Cambric, Swiss and Nansook Em
broidcrv in white and colors.
Linen Sheeting, Stamped Linen and
Embroidery Silk .A large assort
ment of Lace Curtains cheap.
Also Curtain Swiss and Scrim.
LARGEST stock of new Millin
ery Goods. All the latest
6tyles. A large assortment of Lace
and Button Guaranteed Kid Gloves.
Fast Colored Stockings in .Black
and colors for Ladies', Misses',
Children, Men and Boys. Best
dark, blue and light calicoes, 5 ets.
Wool and Cotton Carpet Chain.
Mrs. A E. UHL.
WKKCTIOXS,
Applv a particle of
the IUIiu directly
into ttie miotril.
Iiraa atroi( brcutt a
Oirotltfh the lioae.
Tbc three tlmea a
dav. after llica! prr.
t.-rri. and In-fore
reiinii.
elTs
Cream Balm
CATARRH
M'lMti anl rhtiitc
It Naal PaiuMfC-,
A Uit faiii an t Ir-
fUluiiUtOoa. HrjU
OLD 'N HEAD
I Korea. I'nt.r-ta the Membrane frm Olda
; u-irva tte ix-uM-a trf Tate and amell The
ruifil ! IIMK !y afriwi inn riev mm
ute-e I'nce i i-. nl at I'l-ueKtala or by nuill.
t.LY HUnTHKlW, M Warren Street, J. V.
THE KEELEY CURE
I a tTccial bnnti to btwlnesa men who, havtnr
drifted unconariourly Into the drink habit and
awaken tn find the diaeaae of alcoholism fastened
nrrin them, ren'lerina; them unfit to manage af
fairs reuinrinf a clear brain. four weeka
course of treatment at the
PITT5BURa KEELEY INSTTTUTE,
No. 4246 Fifth Avenue,
ratore to them all their powers, mental and
physical, deatruyt the abnormal appetite, and
restore them to the condition thev were In be
fethey indulred in atimalanuv. This ba.beeB
done in mora than I'M) cases treated here, and
amniif them some of your own neighbors, to
whom we ran refer with confidence as to the
absolute safety and efficiencv of the Keeley Cure.
Tt.e fullest and meat searching inveiiration is
n vited. bead for latmpbiet givifi( full lalormsr
Uon. A
a9vav.
a, a . rv u . n
DKSICM PATENTS.
For lnfnrmstlrn and free Haadtawk write to
NUNN at CO, Ml BaoaowiT. htw YoaC
OMeat bureau for eecurtna patcnta Ut America.
I.vrrr pairnt ukea oat iij u la bronchi before
tbe puUie by a Bullae glvea traeotcaargela tha)
Lanrest errmlstloa of ariT actentldc paper tn the
world. fcileBudiy Illustrated, tio iatcllUrenl
mu should be without It. Week It, 83.00 a
year; !J0 all months. Address, MCSX O0
KuTsaias, Sal iKuadway. Kear Vert City.
IMPOETAKT TO ADVERTISERS.
The cream of the) country pepers U found
In Kcmingtoa'a Cqurtj- Scat Lists. Shrewd
advertisers avail theiusclrei of these lists, a
eorry 0f vhich can be had of Bemingtoa
StoC of Kew York PitWburg.
(
4 Solentlfio American
f Agency io
i n w k wm w
omer
SOMERSET, PA., WEDNESDAY,
MAYFLOWERS.
If you catch the breath of sweetness,
Aud follow the odorous hint
Through the woods w here the dead leav
es rustle.
And the golden mouses glint.
Along the spicy so coast.
Over the desolate down,
You will find the dainty Mayflowers
When you conic to Plymouth town.
Whore the shy spring tends her darlings.
And hidos tuein away from sight,
Pull off the covering of leaf-sprays.
And gather them pink aud while.
Tinted by mystical moonlight.
Freshened by frosty dew,
Till the fair transparent blossoms
To their pure perfection grew.
Then carry them home to your lady.
For flower of the spring is she.
Pink and while, and dainty and slight,
Aud lovely as lovely can be.
Shall they die because she is fair,
"Or live because she is sweet?
They will know lor which they were
born,
But you must wait at her feet.
Mi. lAittiaa (t'htindter) Monllon.
HER BOY.
BY KOBF.KT STEWART.
Miss Boughton was leaning against
the shelves of a little, low-ceilinged,
crowded, second-hand book-shop in
Broadway, jut alsnve Thirty-sixth,
street, dipping into a volume ofM.
Ampere.
"Will you please do that up for me ?"
she said, holding it out. As she ex
tended her arm, her large full sleeve
happened to brush open the cover of
one of those soft, lehther-covered, old
fashioned Bibles, lying on a pile of
school-books, and her eye caught the
delicate faded trAcerie of an inscrip
tion on the yellow fly-leaf "To my
darling boy, from his loving mother.".
"Oh V she said, with a pained start;
"how could any one I'll take that too,
please," and she closed the cover quick
ly, reverently. It seemed to her so
shocking, so cruelly, needlessly cold
hearted, in any one to sell such a gift,
to throw away such a sacred token of
mother-love. The quaint fine, faded
handwriting called up a hundred fan
cies of home and childhood and fond
ling care aud starlit pleadings besides
little beds. Who was the mother who
praj-ed? and w here was the boy who
wandered and forgot? she wondered.
Or, kinder thought, ierliaps he was
dead too, and the book that he had
wept over and found comfort in hud so
fallen into careless strangers' hands,
and made its way at lit-t to the old
bookshop, along w ith dog-eared Latin
grammars and stray maguxines. t?hc
was glad at least that it had come to
one who would preserve and cherish it
as something most sweet and beautiful
and pathetic
The autumn shower which hud driv
en her into this little exchange for rusty
literature had now broken away, and a
watery ray of sunshine came struggling
in at the door, resting on the beutgray
figure of the the proprietor tying
her bundle, and on another per
son whom she had not observed, and
who was lounging against one of the
cases opposite her, fingering the jmges
of an old picture-book, and regarding
her with a jeculiarly eager, covert
gaze. He was a broken-dowu man of
perhaps forty, dressed in a short frock
coat, well buttoned up, that a too inti
mate acquaintance with rain and
weather had turned to a peculiar green
color, aud from out which his long lean
arms and neck protruded to an extra
ordinary length. He was a type easy
enough to classify a type one often
sees in public libraries and round old
book-stalls, refined and poorand ill and
dissipated. Yet there was something
so pathetic in his pale, weak, intellect
ual face, something so appealing and
intense in the look of his large, bright,
brown eyes, which for an instant
caught here over his hollow hectic
cheeks, that Miss ltoughton had a sense
of nearness and sympathy for his dingy
memory of what was once perhaps a
kind and honest gentleman. She of
course turned away her eyes politely,
but instead of taking her package, she
said : "Oh, by-the-bye, I have just
happened to think that I've got to go
to lunch with some people. Would
you mind sending these books home
for me It's only a utep. I live in
Thirty-eighth street." As she gave the
numlter, she thought she saw the other
listening, with his body U-nt fiver the
pages, and his long lean finger pressed
against his thin chin. She hoped he
wasn't going to come and U-g. Some
how she couldn't help believing him to
be a gentleman. She would be so glad
to help him, but she didn't want him
to spoil himself.
Miss I lough ton threw M. Ampere
carelessly ou the table on her return
that afternoon, and took up the worn
old Bible with a certain indignant
pity. Perhaps there might lie some
further biographical details. She turn
ed the pages dreamily, in a kind of
sad pleasure, when suddenly she came
upon a verse enclosed by a broad circle
of ink; and it was this: "I bowed
down heavily as one who mourneth
for his mother." She closed the book
very gently. There were tears in her
eyes. "Ah, he didn't forget," she mur
murtd. One snowy winter morning, some
two months suliseque.nt to this little
episode, her maid brought her a note,
with the message that an answer was
requested. It was addressed in a large,
shaky, masculine hand, and quickly
opening -it, she read : "Some two"
months ago, you may remember buy
ing a Bible in the old book-store just
round the corner from Thirty-sixth
street. The book was mine. When I
tell you that it was my dear mother's
gift, that she wrote my name there,
and that it was my one memento of a
happy past 'ou w'" understand how I
value it. I sold it because I had had
nothing to eat in three days. I asked
her if she'd mind, don't you know,
and she seemed to tell me to. But I
went there and watched it till I could
get it back again, and then you came
and bought it I knew by your face
why you did. God bless you for it ! I
listened for j-our address. I hoped
each day to come ami buy it. I'm dy
ing now, they tell me, so I never can
set
JISTABTASTIKD 1827.
repay you ; but would you mind send
ing it to me? I do want it so. It can't
mean niuch to you, and to me it is all
the world all that is left of hope,
memory, companionship, love, home."
Through the long bare wards of the
hospital the white-gowued nurse led
her silently ; opposite them the snow
was moisting the great high windows.
The whole atmosphere was so tense
with stillness and suffering aud death
that the young lady shivered among
her wraps as she passed down the aisle.
He hud evidently been exjiecting her
for he had been cleanly shaved, and
Miss Boughton was shocked aud yet
pleased by his appearance. - He was
terribly emaciated, aud as he lay with
closed eyes and his face half turned
away, she lioticcd the) fine delicate
chiselling of his features, aud the sen
sitive, almost feminine curves of his
mouth under his mustache. Oue hand
lay closed on the coverlid, bony and
large. His malady seemed to have
cleansed away all the weakness aud
dissipation and squalcr, and left only
the line and beautiful. Life had cloth
ed him in shame aud wretchedness ;
death's mantle draped him iu awful
dignity. The nurse touched him light
ly on the shoulder the poor, sharp
shoulder.. "Here is some one to see
you," she said.
He opened his eyes, which, bright
with fever, were startling, brilliant,
and beautiful, and feebly tried to turn
himself, smiling, and looking at the
bundle she held pressed against her
coat with that quick 'eagerness she re
membered so well. She understood,
and bending forward, pressed bis hand
and laid the book ujkiu his arm.
"Open it, please," he whispered.
She did so, ajid catching it again in
his hands, he looked at the inscription,
and assured that it was his very own,
with a force for which she was entirely
unprepared he pressed it to his lips and
hugged it his breast.
"Uod bless you !" he said with a look
of the most grateful happiness. "Oh,
my dear mother ! my dear mother !"
For some moments he lay silent, witli
his eyes shut, but when she attempted
gently to draw away her hand, he de
tained it feebly with his own.
"The world is full of kindness," he
said, with his faint smile. Kver so
many eople have been nice to me, all
in all. That U why I thought it so
sweet of you to come. I like to think,
don't you know, that the last thing
which happened to me was a kindness.
It's a pleasant thought to take away
with one. My mother will be so grate
ful to you."
Miss Boughton felt the tears coming;
he was such a gentleman and he must
have suffered so. "Ah, it is pitifully
little," she said. "I might have done
so much if I had only know n."
He looked down ut the counterpane
ally, spreading out his skinny hand.
"You have done what you could," he
said presently, smiling into her face.
"I want you to remember that always
as a great happiness that you have
done what you could. It's a beautiful
thing to be a good woman," he added
softly, as if to himself. "I haven't
been a very good man. I was weak
and emotional, and then she died, aud
then I lost my money, and then I bor
rowed from my friends, aud then I got
to drinking oh it's the old story.
There are hundreds like me. But I
want you to know, because you have
been so very good to me, and because
there isu't one soul in all this world
who cares whether I die here or drop
by the way-side, that I have always
tried to lie good, and to do as she want
ed me, and that every night I have
read here, and thought of her and
longed for her."
Miss Boughton hesitated. "Would
you like me to to read to you ?" she
asked.
"Thank you very, much," he said,
shaking his head, "but I'd rather say
it to myself, if you don't mind. I re
member so well every tone, every in
flection, of her voice. I can quite hear
her. She was a beautiful reader."
He closed his eyes again, and a little
contented sigh escaped him. She could
see his lips moving, murmuring, the
lunik still pressed tightly to his breast.
Miss Boughton leaned over him aud
could just catch the words, . "and
take me to heaven when I die.
Amen !"
It was a prayer learned at his moth
er's kuee, and as he breathed it, a
smile as trustful and innocent as a little
child's played over his face.
Her friend the nurse came presently
ami stopped beside the bed. "Your
mission," she whispered gently, "is
fulfilled "In 'rrxr'a Magazine for
February.
"Poor Maria," said Sophia.
"She's as sick as she can be,
"In her coffin, much I'm fearing,
"We shall soon Maria see."
"Sad dilemma," answered F.mma
"Yet can I a cure suggest
"For your friend so sore oppressed.
"Dr. Pierce, of Uuffalo,
"For relief f woman's woe,
"'Favorito Prescription' makes.
"She who with promptness takes
"Soon gets rid ot pains and aches.
"Kid her take it and assure her,
"That it will most surely cure her."
Dr. It. V. Pieiu e: Dear Air Mine
is a case of eleven years' standing,
which battled the skill of the best med
ical aid procurable. I obtained no
god ellcct, until . I began the use of
the "Favorite Prescription," which
lifted the burden which was seeking
my life.
My gratitude I owe to the "Prescrip
tion." I hope that all suffering humanity
(as in my case) may profit by the re
sult of my experience.
EvouxeNeil,
Vyrf lutnain O., 11". IVr.
As a Safeguard.
Dorkins "What was Harkaway do
ing at the Scorchem lire Insurance
oftice'the other day ?"
Gorkins "Taking out a policy on
his new comedy."
Dorkins "A fire insurance policy on
his play ! Why did he do that?"
Gorkjns "Well, it was so full of
dry humor that he had to do it as a
Tim . I
MAY 13. 1813.
An Alibi if Hard to Prove.
From the Boa Ion llcnild.
It w ill be remembered that the sen
ior Weller recommended that an alibi
be set tip by the defense in the cele
brated case cf Bank 11 vs. PickwicR for
breach of promise. The joke of the
rcconuuendution was in its absurdity.
Seriously, however, there is a great
risk in setting up such a plea without
strong proof of the fact. An unsuc
cessful attempt to establish an alibi is
always a circumstance of great weight
against a prisoner, because a resort to
that kind of defense implies an ad
mission of the truth and relevancy of
the fuels alleged and a correctness of
the inferences drawn from them ; and
where it fails it is generally on the
ground that the witnesses are disbe
lieved and the defendant's story re
garded as a fabrication. This is not
universally true, however. An extra
ordinary case to the coutrary occurred
in an English Court in l-4, iu an ac
tion against a young man named Bob
iuson, who, on the positive evidence of
many persons as to his identity, was
convicted of larceny, but afterward an
alibi was satisfactorily proved, and he
received a pardon.
' This plea often involves considera
tions of the most difficult and perplex
ing character. It is not an uncommon
article to endeavor to give coherence
and etlbrt to a fabricated defense of ali
bi by assigning the events of another
day to that ou which the crime was
committed, so that the events, being
true in themselves, are necessarily con
sistent with each other, and false only
as they are applied to the day iu ques
tion. Dr. Amos, a famous lecturer at
the London Medical Lyceum, reports
a case in which a gentleman was rob
bed and swore positively to the identi
ty of the prisoner, but nevertheless a
complete adbi was proved. The wit
nesses, examined separately, all spoke
of the same minute circumstances
transpiring while the prisoner was in
their company on the day and hour of
the robbery, and in particular that a
church bell for funerals was tolling,
which in fact, tolled every day at that
particular hour when the robbery was
committed. The prisoner was ac
quitted.
A year afterward the gentleman, see
ing the prisoner in a little shop, went
to him and gave his word that as now
all danger was over, if he would tell
the truth no injury should happen to
him, but the contrary. The man re
plied:
"I did nb you. The alibi was false,
and when the jury turned around to
consider the verdict I felt a shudder
ing within me unlike anything I had
ever l-fore felt, or believed I could
fee!.' The consequence was that I
vowed to get my bread iu a different
way for the future, and, with that pur
pose have got into this little shop."
In Kll a resjicctable young man
was tried in an English court for high
way robU-ry committed at Bethnal
Green, in which neighborhood he and
the victim of the robU-y resided. The
latter swore positively that the prison
er was the man who had roblaxl him
of his watch. Counsel for the prisoner
called a genteel young woman, to
whom the defendant had paid his ad
dresses, aud she gave evidence which
established a complete alibi. The
complainant was then ordered out of
court, and, in the interval another
young man named Greenwood, who
was to be tried on a capital charge,
was introduced and placed by the side
of the prisoner. Then the prosecutor
was again put into the witness box
thus addressed:
"IU-member, sir, the life of this young
mail depends upon your reply to the
question I am about to put. Will you
swear again that the young man at
the liar is the person w ho assaulted
and roblied you?"
The witness turned his head toward
the dock, when, beholding two men so
nearly alike, he Isvame petrified with
astonishment, dropped his hat and
was speechless for a time, but at length
declined swearing against cither. Of
course, the young man was acquitted.
Greeuwoixl was tried for the other
crime and executed. A few hours lie-
fore his death he confessed that he had
committed the robbery with which
the other had been charged.
Of all kinds of exculpatory defense
that of an alibi, if clearly established
by unsuspected testimony, is the most
satisfactory and conclusive, since it
excludes the possibility of the truth of
the accusation. A defense of this
nature is usually entertained w ith sus-
suspicion, however, because it is easily
concocted and frequently resorted to
falsely. It is essential to the satisfac
tory establishment of an alibi that it
should cover the whole of the time of
the transaction to which it relates, so
as to render it impossible that the pris
oner could have committed the act. It
is not sufficient that it renders his
guilt improbable.
Two prisoners, charged with setting
a house afire, proved that they were in
bed on the night in question at 12
o'clock and were found in Led next
morning after the arson had taken
place, but the plea of alibi was disre
garded liecause the distance being only
two miles, they might have risen, com
mitted the deed and returned to bed.
Early iu the present century an alibi
was established in a French court by a
distinguished citizen of that country,
charged with murder, through the
forethought of himself and accomplice
in calling each other by assumed
names, overheard by several people
near the scene of the tragedy. One of
the eople whose name had been as
sumed was subsequently arrested, tried
and wrongly executed for the crime.
After the demise of the real murderer,
the accomplice, on his deathbed, con
fessed to the horrible cheat.
Hope Living in the Future.
Dan Berry "I hope Congress won't
suspend immigration just yet"
Port Chester "What do you care
about it?"
Dan Berry "If they'll only let
things run along as they are for a few
years, I may be able to hire a cook."
;eralcl
The Penalty of Humor.
When the time cume for the jieople
of the thirteen "united colonies to pro
claim to the world that they were free,
ami that they held them stives absolv
ed from all allegiance to the British
crown, and that all political connection
between them and Oreat Britain was
totally dissolved, a committee of the
Continental Congress was appointed
to draw up a declaration of imlejieiid
ence. The mcmU-rs of this committee
were Benjamin Franklin, of Pennsyl
vania, John Adams, of Massachusetts,
Itoger Sherman, of Connecticut, Itobert
It. Livingston, of New York, and
Thomas Jefferson, of Virginia. Why
was it tliat their colleagues committed
the writing of the I)eclaration of Inde
pendence to Thomas Jefferson and not
to Benjamin Franklin? The Virgin
ian was not the most prominent man,
even of his own section, and although
his reputation could not faiily lie term
ed local, it was but little more, while
the name of the Peimsylvanian was
known throughout the whole civilized
world. Franklin was not only the
foremost citizen of Philadelphia, where
the Congress was sitting, he was the
most exerieiied publicist and the most
accomplished man of letters in all the
thirteen colonies, and he was especial
ly well equipjied for the draw ing up of
an apial to Europe, as he had but just
returned from London, where he had
been pleading the cause of his country
men with indomitable courage and in
disputable skil Yet Franklin was
not asked to write the Declaration of
Independence, and although he ami
Adams made a few verbal ameiid
nienU, the credit of that great state
paper ln-longs to Jefferson. And why
was it that this great responsibility wa
placed on Jefferson and not on Frank
lin? I think the explannation lies in the
fact that Franklin was a Humorist.
Not only was Franklin's sturdy common-sense
felt to tie too plain a home
spun for wear in the courts of Euroja?,
when the thought needed to be attired
in all th lofty rhetoric that the most
fervid enthusiasm could produce", but
also, I fear me greatly, his colleagues
were afraid that Franklin would have
his joke. It would be a gotal joke, no
doubt prolwbly a very good joke, but
the very best of jokes would not lie in
keeping with the stately occasion.
They were acute, these leaders of the
Continental Congress, and they know
that every m:n has the defect of his
qualities, and that a hum irist is
likely to be lacking in reverence,
and that the writer of the Del la rat ion
of Indeietideuce had a theme which
demanded the most reverential treat
ment. Ho it was that Benjamin Franklin
had to pay the penalty of humor in
the la-t century, ju-t as Abraham Lin
coln had to pay it iu this century. Be
cause Lincoln was swift to seize ujion
an incongruity, and U-cause besought
relief for his abiding melancholy in
playfulness, there were not a few who
refused to take him seriously.
Even after hit death there were hon
est folk who held the shrewdest and
loftiest of our statesmen to have been
little U tter than a buffoon. Of the
three greatest Americans Franklin,
Washington and Lincoln, two were
humorists, aud it is perhaps his defi
ciency of humor which makes Wash
ington seem more remote from us and
less frie:illy thri either of the
others. From The Penalty of Humor,
by Brainier Matthews, iu JIiirjMr't
M'ty'tunr for May.
The Cork Mystery.
When a eork pops from a U.ttle of
champagne or soda water that would
seem to be the end of it, for while it is
popping a new one is being manufact
ured to take its place. The amount of
money spent annually in corks in the
raited States is enormous. .Imports
of cork wood or bark lat year amount-
t
ed to considerably over a million dol
lars. Much of the bark used in the
manufacture of corks comes from Spain
or Portugal, and in case of war the
price is sure to advance.
The steamer James Brand recently
brought from Lisbon to this country
the largest cargo of cork bark ever re
ceived in one shipment. She discharge
ed 5,401 bales. The same week 14!
bales arrived from Liverpool ami 72
bales from Giberaltar. Patent stopicrs
have to a large extent superseded the
use of cork, but the latter is still an
important industry. Where the corks
go after being used is a mystery. oA
on Trarrlcr.
Delightful Blundering.
A little boy in the course of his read
ing lesson came to the word "widow,"
mid called it "window," a word more
familiar to him. The teacher, who
was acting as examiner, lorreeted the
blunder, and then, w ishing to improve
the occasion, put the question, "What
is the difference between 'widow' and
'window ? " The boy's answer liegan,
"You can see through a window, but "
and then stopped. The amusement
plainly visible on the teacher's face
prevented this miniature Sam Weller
from completing the contrast.
Now, the blunder here, so far as it
was a blunder, was entirely due to the
teachei. He did not mean to Impress
on his pupils the transparency of a
window as contrasted with a widow,
but the difference in spelling between
ttie two words. IUtokwootr Mtyi
sine. An Ideal Panacea.
James L. Francis, Alderman, Chica
go, says: "I regard Dr. King's New
Discovery as an Ideal Panacea for
Coughs, Colds and Lung Complaints,
having used it in my family for the
last five years, to the exclusion of phy
sician's prescriptions or other prepara
tions." Ilev. John Burgus, Keokuk, Iowa,
writes: "I have t-cn a Minister of the
Methodist Episcopal Church for fifty
years or more, and have never found
anything so beneficial, or that gave me
such speedy relief as Dr. King's New
Discovery." Try this Ideal Cough
ltemedy now. Trial Bottles Free at
J. N. Snyder's drug store, Somerset,
Pa, or at Brallier's drug store, lierlin,
l'a.
WHOLE NO. 2337.
Shooting a Hat.
As we were Hearing Henrietta, Tex.,
the conductor came into the smoking
car, in which alut a dozen men were
seated, and after a ni'.i around he
said:
"Gentlemen, we shall b3 pretty cer
tain to pick up six or eight eowtaiys at
Henrietta, and they w ill all come in
this car. They are good fellows, as we
know, but rather w ild. For instance
should they find any of you wearing
a plugged hat they would very likely
la?giu shooting at the hat. .Sorry to
put you to any trouble, but I thought
I ought to tell you atiout it."
Five of us were wearing plugs. Four
of us made haste to get them out of
sight. The fifth-was a small, quiet
looking chap who had the apjaarauee
of a consumptive. He was reading a
book and enjoying his own comiany.
lie looked up, listened to the conduct
or aud then slanted his hat over his ear
and went on reading.
"I thought I'd lietttr speak about it,
you know," suid the conductor in an
apologetic way as he lingered.
"Yes, I hear you," was the quiet re
ply of the man addressed,
"You you will keep your hat ou
"I shall."
It wasn't our funeral, aud so we had
nothing to say. We all tiok scats on
the other side of the car, however, and
as the train pulled up seven wild cow
boys ou the platform whooped and
yelled and came rushing into the car.
They took seats at the front end of the
car, while the plug-hat man was s-ated
at the rear. It wasu't a minute le
fore one of the gang shouted:
"Look at it, will you look at that
hat T'
"Shoot it !" yelled the second.
'Gimme the first pop !" yelled a
third.
This third man stood up in his seat,
drew his gun and fired six bullets into
the tall hat as fast as you can count,
making six holes which were plain to
view. His comrades were laughing
and applauding, when the stranger
put down his book, rose up, and there
was a pop ! pop ! pop : from the pistol in
his hand. The cowboy was still on his
fccL A bullet split the lobe of his right
ear, a second the lobe of his left, a
third fourth, fifth and sixth cut notch
es in his sombrero and sent pieces of
his felt flying in the air. After the
reports had ceased the two- men faced
each other for twenty seconds without
a word. Then the plug-hat man calm
ly inquired:
"Is there anything more I cau do
for your crowd ?
"You bet !' heartily responded the
other, who had seemed a bit dazed.
"This 'ere crowd wants to drink with
you and then hev you learn us how to
shivit !"
They rushed over to him and shook
hand, lugged his pardon for shooting
his hat, and the man with his ears
sji'.it admiringly exclaimed:
'B ys, he could hev put them six
bullets into my eye, one after the other
but he just wanted to let me live to
realize that I d.m't know enough to
hol l a gu:i right aud fust ! Sich shoot
in' as he did ! Yum ! Yum ! Durn my
hide, but I never expected to see sich
fine work, and thjs is the happiest day
of my life !" Ikitt tWr 1W.
Rupture or Hernia
cured without cutting. Send 10 cents
for a large book, testimonials and ref
erences. Address, or lils IMspen
sary Medical Association, Buffalo,
N. Y.
Grim Wit.
TIk' bite Frederick Iocker-I.aniison
relates in his autobiographical "Confi-
deneea" that his uncle used to say that
"you could not widen the mouth of a
Locker without injury to 1ms ears."
One day, at Malta, this frank old gen
tlemen asked a stranger, who had just
landed to take wine with him, and ex
pressed his obligation for the favor by
saying: Yesterday, sir I was the ugliet
man in all Malta !"
For Your Protection.
Catarrh "cures" in liquid form to be
taken internally, usually contain either
Mercury or Imlide of Potassa, or both,
which are injurious if ton long taken.
Catarrh is a lHal' not a blood disease,
caused by sudden change to cold and
damp weather. It starts in the nasal
p;tssage. Cold in the head causes ex
cessive flow of mucus and, if repeated
ly neglected, the results of catarrh will
follow, aud ofentimes on offensive dis
charge. Ely's Cream Balm is the
acknowledged cure for these troubles
and contains no mercury uor any in
jurious drug.
It May Do a3 Much For You.
Mr. Fred Miller, of Irving, III.,
writes that had a Severe Kidney trouli
le fir many years, with severe pains in
his back and also that his bladder was
alfected. He tried many so called
Kidney cures but without auy good
result. Aliout a year ago he lvg:in use
of Electric Bitters and found relief at
once. Electric Bitters is especially
adapted to cure of almost all Kidney
and Liver troubles and often give al
most instant relief. One trial will
prove our statement. Price -VX". and
$1.00. At J. N. Snyder's drug store,
Somerset, Pa., or at Brallier's drug
store, Berlin, Pa.
Gen. Grant used to tell a story of a
soldier in a certain regiment during
the war who was continually bother
ing him asking favors. Grant one day
said to him: "Look here, I 1-lievc
you are the most troublesome man in
the Union nrmy."
"The man quickly replied: "Why
that's funny, sir !"
"Funny, how do you make it out
funny?"
"Because it Ls just what thi enemy
says about you."
"I burned ray fingers very badly.
The pain was intense. Dr. Thomas'
Eclectrlc Oil brought relief in three
! minutes. It was almost magical.
! I never saw anything like it." Amelia
' Swords, Saundersville, Ohio.
Food For Thought
It is easy to make a failure of suctks.
He teuKh-, bst who laugh at the
fight time.
Arguing w ith a fool show that there
are two.
M" t !nj n l-ok on d.nh as a bur py
rellt-f.
Truth never blii-)h4 wLpo you U.fc
it in the face.
The laitlle slaya iiitinitely more
Jib' than the lattK
A man in love doesn't uwd ey
glasses for he is blind.
A good heart is always a soft mark
for a good head.
D.n't fool with sin. It is safer to'
play w ith a rattlesnake.
The devil gets all the votes, when
some men run for office.
The people w ho talk the most do not
always say the most.
Every true prayer begins with a right
feeling toward men.
(jiaal fortune does not always ride iu
a gold-mounted carriage.
Spending t cents foolishly leads to
spending the same way.
To live without prayer is to live a
h tlf-hearted and one-sided life.
When the heart is full of vinpasnioii
there Is not rsm for prejudiiv.
We owe a debt of love to every one
in the world who needs our love.
The man who fears the light, is kept
tired by running from a shadow.
Some men reach a turning point
in life every time a pretty woman
pa-s.
Wlty is it that we always believe we
can save a little money next month'.'
Nobody can help noticing the short
comings of the man behind time.
God has never tried to make a man
who could please everybody else.
The more God gives us to do th
more need there is that we should
pmy.
The yoke of Christ is easy only when
it is worn every day iu the week.
Learning how to pray consists main
ly in getting the right attitude to pray.
To cherish an unforgiving spirit, is
to refuse to go all the way to the crossi
with Christ.
Sme people spend enough time cry
ing over spilled milk to buy a w hole
cow.
The man who has the ni'ist claim
upon us, Ls often the one we have the
least claim upon.
No man ever got enough religion in
his head to cause the devil an hour's
uneasiness.
Curious isn't it, that men who ride
hobbies never seem te lie headed the
same way. .
The friends of the devil are the first
to get mad when the gospel is being
preached right.
As long as the Christian has trials
he may know that God loves him and
the devil hates him.
No one can work effectively for the
salvation of men unless he first prays
fervently for them.
Women will do much to please the
men but more from far of what other
women will say about her.
It should never be forgotten that
each tine of us is a part of the very
society which we so freely criticise.
The Christian's business should come
to a standstill whenever it interferes
with I osl's business.
Visiting the sick w ill often cureluke
warmness with as much dispatch as
mustard w ill raise a blister.
There nre j-ople who watch the
clock in church and count the minutes
as thousrh they were diamonds.
The Good Samaritan forg-it that the
Jew was his enemy as sion as he got to
where he e-.nild see him bleoL
No man who sincerely sevks help
from Christ will ever fail to get it l?
cause there are flaws in his theology.
Some people &t! ''ady to give the
Iinl anything the preacher will take
m quarterage, but never have :my time
to devote to his service.
Man is like fire and woman is like
straw ; the devil blows between.
When a man does anything especial
ly mean he is prone to lay the blame
on poor, weak human nature.
Believe only half what your hear
and tell only half w hat you U-lieve.
Even the invention of the linking
glass has not eradicated human vanity.
In the banquet of life tlie scum is
sometimes taken for the cream.
No man is strictly soU-r who has
taken intoxicating liquors.
If there were no wise men there
would la.' no fools.
There is an old saw to cover every
specie of deviltry.
For every quarter in a man's pocket
there are a dozen uses; and to use each
one in such a way as to thrive the
greatest U-nefit is a question every one
must solve for himself. We believe,
however, that no Utter use could W
made of one of these quarters than to
exchange it for a bottle of Chamber
lain's Colic, Cholera and Diarrhoea
liemcdy, a medicine that every family
should be provided with. For sale by
Ren ford's Pharmacy.
Smart Wife D.m't worry, George,
I wrote an article to the paper to-day
show ing how to get up a family dinner
for 1, and I took it around, the editor
gave me a dollar.
Husband That's a rare piece of good
luck. What are you going to do w ith
the dollar.
Wife I'm going to trythat recipe my
self, and see if it will work.
A Load, Not a CjM.
"Where's Bill Clark this morning?'
a-ked the book-keeper.
"He sent word to the office this
morning that he had a heavy cold,"
said the second head book-keeper.
"Oh! when I saw him lost night I
was almost sure he hod a heavy load
of some kind, but I did not think it
was a cold." Iiiiitnuioli Jiwrnnl.
Beecher's Answer.
"I would like a place that doesn't re
quire much work," a young man is
quoted iu the Youth' Ciimim as
s tying to Heury .Ward Beeeher.
"Well," lie replied, "I know of no place
for vou but the grave."
Mom ma and luiby returned from a
walk. Oh, says mamma to her hus
band, such good news. lUiby talks,
II ha just said his first word.
It -ally ?
Yes, jut fancy. We were in th
biological gardens, standing before the
monkey rage w hen the baby cried out,
Look at Papa.
Out of weakness comes strength,
when the blood has been purified, en
riched and vitalised by Hood's Safsa
I at ilia
II