measures arc ilk popples spread Toa wixe tbe flower, lu bloom I shed ; Or like tbe rainbow 'i lovely form Vanishing amid the norm." n easarca arc soadovrs of a dream, Bubbles fliaUnioatberjTam, Meterlors Cashing tbro' the night, a. moment seer, then lost to right. Oh, no! nit So, It cannot l. Kcplies fc.nd, faltblul memory : Twer best to let the flower remain An J itrcw Its Uojjoms on the plain, II sacS were trus tbe raia bow's form Tho' ne'er ao lovely hal ceased to charm, A drop of water, a ray of light, Ilrings back in fleeting colore bright. Wbea parted from lie jarcnt sitm Tbe ro- will Kindly live again : Tho' turn iu leaflets, abed lit blooni, la in own deattlcss, fwoct nerfutue. ULU 1SA9. Farmer Ilendergon came in from tbe barn ooe morning with bin bauds and clothes "ret and covered with mud, his face red tad Lis eves flush-'iff- "Ned !" lie sbooted, a Le entered the kitchen. "Where's Xed ?" ' II- re I am !" came a cbierj voice ia rcjilv ; and an iostant after a bright, Kironif boy of some tixiecu yearn entered tbe old fashioned conn try kitchen from the &djjiuiug ood-i-bed, where be bad been cutting po. tatoe6for tbe dayV planiing. "Da you want anything "I vrant to tell yoa tbia," eaid Mr. Ileudcrson, as be washed himself at the eiuk, and rubbed bid weaiber beaten face with tbe coarse to we! ojiil it was even more red than be fore. "Old Dan mutit be killed ! .Jus; t-ee tbe ta:e I am in, and all from tbat worthless eld rat-cal! 1 won't have Lim about tbe bouse an other day. lie's good for nothing liut tr make trouble, and be roost be ,bot before nigbi!'' added tbe farm er, wratbfully. Ned was about to plead for bis pet, when bis little eister came into the rocm "WLy, papa, what is tbe matter 2" he cried, running to bim in astonish ment . Did you fall intv tbe cretk, psp ?" "1 might as well," !;e replied, La!f Iiiugbiog. "Old Diin butted no into lb watering-trough !" There was a Kboutof lauithter from both children, in which their motber joined. "Well, Jtdedidh," said Mrs. Hen derson, coming into the kitcbeu, and. still febakijr with mirth, "wbat could you have been thinking about to let an old ram, most twenty years old, knock you into tbe watering tronch f " "But," erplafaed her LusUaad, "be took cue auawares. I bad just filled one pail to carry to tbe barn, and was 6ioo;injr to dip the other, when tbe old rascal came at me like tbe wind, and knocked me completely! into the water I lie scampered, I tell you, before I could pet out. lie knew be bad done mischief. Anybow, he's got to be killed, to-day, sure. lie's only a nuisance, and I'll shoot bim to-night, when we como back from , town, if he's on the farm!'' Two boar9 later Mr. and Mrs Henderson drove away to be absent from home until night As the; rattled out of tbe yard Old Dan sud denly appeared close to the gate, and, wagging Lis tail as if in dera tion, gave atterance to a boarse "I?a-a-a!" The farmer tamed shook bin whip a: the fellow, and cried, "Tbis is your last day, my boy, make tbe most of it !" Ned and Carrie were the only cbil dren. Leaving Carrie in tbe buuttt alone, after they bad considered awhile whether there was any wav of advening Old Dan's sad fat Ned nhoul lered bis boeand marched off to bis work, planting potatoes with Uronsoc, tbe hired aian, in tbe "back lot" Bat tho little girl of thirteen bad no thought ot being afraid. She bad the breakfast dishes to wash, some sweeping to do, and tbe dinner to get, all before 1 2 o'clock. Time Ced. Tbe dishes stood io shining rows upon tbe pantry shelves, the broom bad performed it work, and Carrie was "preparing the vegetables to be boiled, when there came a faint knock at tbe door. Sup posing it to be one of the neighbor, the little girl did not rise, but called : "Come in!" The door was slowly opened and a man stepped within. He wore a long black coat, button ed to bis chin, and very threadbare. His trousers, too, were black and suiny, and much too short for him. On one foot was a boot, while tbe other was graced by a ragged shoe He carried a battered silk bat in bis Land. His lace was long and solemn, but quite red, Lis eyes bleared, bi bands were dirty, and altogether be was a queer looking visitor. "Is your ma at Lome, miss ?" said be. in a half whine, as Le glanced sharply around the room. "No, sir," replied Carrie, wonder ing wby ba asked; "she ha gone to Underhill. Did you wish to tee her J" "Oh, no," the maa replied. "I only asked oct of politeness, you know," and be smiled solemnly at tbe little girl, and winked one eye. "No, I came on business with your pa particular, urgent business. S'pose he's round, is be not?" "No, sir; he went to town wttb mother," paid Carrie. "Now that's too bad !" exclaimed the visitor, aa he seated himself; "and I've come eo far to see bim ISut perhaps' your brother or sister would do as well." "I haven't any sister" eaij tbe little hostess laugbiog, "and cay brother's over ia the back lot. He'll be in by-and-bye, though, if he will do." "Well, I don't hardly believe be will, after all," said tbe man, shaking his head tbouf htfully, "and 1 can't wait to-day anyway; I baint tbe time. But I'm" terribly hungry. It I cculd I'd stay to dinner Miss However, finder tbe circumstances, perhaps yoa bad better rive me a light lunch before I go; a piece ot pie, and a cup of tea,, and a little -cold meat, or something of tbat eort " "Ob, certainly ; only I can't give yaw the meat, for we haven't it in tb iouse," said Carrie, rising, "but, I wiH find something " And she brought from tbe pantry a whole apple pie, which ene placed before (him, with a inife and fork. "If you will help yourself IU have tUe tea ready ia tiree minutes." All right, my dear," said tbe man, '.izing tbe knife and drawing tbe pit Coward him I will act pon your advice. Tbe first time I took aUnner with General Grant," he continued, cat a great piece, and began to eat, "he said to me, 'Governor, governor, said be, 'never disregard a lady's Advice;' and I have always remem bered what he said," and be chuck led merrily, and nodded bis head, at tbe delicious looking pastry before im. ; Carrie wondered a little at tbe liable manners of tbe maa who bad ! dined wiib Grant, but the steeped J his tea, flavoring it with rich cream land passing it to bim. "I am not much of a hand for tea," f-tld tbe man, as be drained tbe cup, "but roy doctor saya tbat I must 'drink it far my digestion. Rained imydit'eoiion while I was in the army, yoa see ;" and he winked sol , e mrily. "By the way," he continued, 'nickinff ud tbe silver teaspoon from ! his saucer, "have vou any more of thpse ? They are "as neat a pattern 1 as I ever f aw, and odd too. I fboold Jibe to ee tbe rest of the dozen, if I t ju have them." ! ' "Mother has only eleven," said ' Carrie, in ber innocence, "and ebe is ; very proud of them ; but I will show them io you." Then the b ought the little box itb the precious table silver eleven teaspoons, four tableepoonB and an accicnt cream jag all pore silver, and i-hining brightly and placed them before ber icqoieitive visitor to admire. He bad Guisbed his "light lunch." Tbat is, tbe pie was demolished and the tea pot empty. As the liule girl handed bim tbe treasure be arose, took tbe bux to tbe window, examin ed its contents with a critical eye for a moment, and then, as iflnjjjfal e.urprie, cried : "I am right! Tbey are the very ppoonsl Tne very same identical spoons that bit friend lost when be was a boy. llow locky it is that I have fjund tbem at last 1" With these words, and a very low bow, tbe rascal opened the door and slipped away with the spoons and tbe silver cream pitcher down the path toward tbe gate. For a moment Carrie stood motion-lew-; then, rushing after him, the shrieked : "Give me those spoons !" Tney are my mother's Bnoons, and yoa are trying to 6teal them! You are a thief, a thief! Bring tbem back! bring tbem back!" Tbe man, however, pid no atten tion to tbe child's crioe, but ran rap idlv down the path, carrying the box in'iiis arms; and the spoons and pi-.cber would have been lost forever if a new party bad not happened on tbe t-oeoe. O.d Dan was quietly nibbling the frasn near the gate way. Hearing bis litUe mistress' voice, he looked uo at tbe very instant that tbe tramp pawd. What be saw about the man that disturbed bim I don't know ; but, erecting bis bead with a hoarse "B-a-a !" be shot after him KLo a cannon ball. Tbe man turned to receive him and defend himself, bat the ram struck bim fairlv in front and knocked bim, half fceBsiiless, flat on his back, scat tering tbe silver in all directions. Fur an instant tbe fellow remained sprawling in tbe c'ust, then he slowly arose, limuing and groaning, and wittont a glance at the enemy, began to gather up bis stolen spoils. He bad partly completed his task wbeo Old Dan, wto all ibis time bad been watching tbe proceedings from beneath bi shaggy eyebrows, ciook bis long beard, and with another tro-, mi adous "Ba-a-a!" dashed at bim arain, ana over he went a second lime, bis treascres flying from bis bands. And now begaa a ttaoge battle. Wiib cries of rage and pain, tha man recovered bis feet and turned upon tbe ram, kicking aod striking at him furiously, while Dan, accustomed to Huch warfare from years of eiperi euce wiib tbe boys of the country side, easily eluded him, and io re turn butted him to tbe earth again aud aain. Tee spoons and cream pitcher were kaotksd hither and thither, as the cotapitauts struggled, the road was trampled into something like a race-1 make a heavy plunge with both bi coarse tbe atr was fided with veryTtbumbs. and at tbe same instant I ' j.i . i ! a 1 I. .. n AA.nt ftf ilia Irnan hd UrxMittire. verr anzrr Da-a-as and a grea; cloud of dust. Bat altr 6ome five minutes, rfcto rv declared itself npon tbe side of the qjHdruped : ana, oruisea ana meet ing, wiib clothes in rags, minus hat aud shoes, the vanquished man sud denly turned away and ran limping down the road, leaving his antagon ist in fall possession of tbe field and the stolen silver. Old Dan remained motionless, goz ing after his enemy aniil he disap oeared around a distant turn in the road ; then shaking tbe dost from biscjurse wool, he gave Btterance to a lo irrumble of satisfaction, and, wasreine his tail, returned to the din ner in front of tbe bouse. naif an hour later, as Carrie wash ed the cjveted spoons and the bright little Ditcher and laid them carcluliy away ooce more, sbe told ber brother the story, ana now tne roooer wt foiled ; and Ned, full ot entbusiam crid : "We will not kill Old Dan at all, for I do not believe that father would shoot him now or a hundred dol lars!" And tbe boy was rigit. The old ram won more than he knew when be fouirbt tbe tramp and conquered bim. He won bis master's regard, and a free, happy life for tbe remain dor of bis days Youth's t'ompait ion brl j Tamalen. To have this regetable Ctf-rthe table at an early d&ia it is necessary to employ expeditious methods of ob taining plants. A couple of weeks ago we gave, at tbe request of scae of our readers.the approved method of isakiog a bot bed, aud in tbe last is sue of tbe rrairie Farmer a corres pondent details bis method of prod o" ing bot tool heat by tbe use of 6. e. By either method plants from early sowing of seed may be obtained sev eral weeks in advance of the time wben tbey may reasonably be looked for, if sowing seed is delayed until it is prudent to sow in the open ground. T;iin sowing is preferable in tbe hot bed, for if pittcts are too thick' tbey crowd each other, grow spindling, and are less hardy anj vigorous wben transplanted than whaa tbey staad far enough apart to let in sun light aod air. In a few days the young plaau will have a growth of three or four locoes, and will require to be aired, if nndar class. Or tbe seed may be sown ia shallow boxes, aod placed in a south window where ibey wU germinate and grow until large enough to transplant. Some times tbe plant are transplanted into cold frames, where those are at hand, aud remain there sntit all danger of frost u past, aod then set out tarco or four feet apart where tbey are to remain This course makes them stocky and hardy, if the are well at tend to, aud secures fruit earlisr than by other methods. Ia transplanting to tbe open ground, it ia well to se lect some sheltered spot where tbe soil is moderately rich. If located on the eouth side of a building or fence, the growth of tbe plant will bo expe dited. Some support for the branches of ibe vinea fdonld be provided to keep tbe fruit from the ground, and wben tbe fruit is Bet, a few inches cut from the top of the vines will cause more rapid ripening. OSE-SIDE0 FIGHT. The debate on the amendment to tbe army bill, prohibiting ttoops at the polls as a police fores to preserve order was concluded in committee of the whole on Monday of last week, and the bill parsed. Tbe Republi cans bad tbe debate to themselves, and fifteen of their gaseous orators made speeches against the ptoposi tion which they voted and which Mr. Hayes approved last Jane. They waved the bloody shirt high, bat fail ed to elicit a response. They had tbe fight to themselves, except this little interlude introduced by Mr C.x to fcbow tbe one sided character ot tbe struggle : Congressional Record, April 1 1 Mr. Cox I do not intend to de bate. I want to have a descriptive scene to illustrate this afternoon in the House rea l from tbe "Georgia Scenes," written by Judge Long street, to shew wbat a one-sided fight we have bad. Mr. Frye Ucw much of it? Mr. Cox Not very long, bat it is interesting. Mr. Frye I wieh to yield my re maining time to the gentleman from Wisconsin. Mr Cox But you yielded to me. Mr Frye 1 yielded to the gentle man for a speech. Mr. Cox Tbis is part of my speech. Mr. Frye Tbe gentleman can speak 60 much better than a book, 1 wish to hear bim. Cries of "Read!' "Read!- Mr Frye I now yield five minutes to tbe gentleman from New York to make a speech by proxy. Mr. Cox Tbe "gentleman from New York" prefers to make a speech by Coxy. Laughter I send my speech to tbe clerk's deck. Tbe clerk read as follows : Rapt with tbe enchantment of the season and the scenery around me, I was slowly rising tbe slope, when I was startled by loud profane and boisterous voice, which seemed to proceed from a thick covert of under growth about two hundred yards lo advance ot me and about two hun dred yards to tbe right of my road. "You kin, kin you ?" "Yes I kin, and am able to do it ! Boo-oo-oo! On, wake snakes, and walk you clak-! B.imstone and Crel Dou'i bold me, Nick Stoval! Tbe fight's made np, and let's go at it ; my eoul if I don't jump down bis tboatand gallop every chittering out of him before yoa can say 'quit !' " "Now, Nick, don't hold bim! Jist jet tbe wild cat come, and I'll tame bim. Jsed'li ace me in a fair fight, won't you, edf" "Oh, yes; I'll sea you a fair ffght, blast my old ehoes if I doa't." 'That's sbflicient, as Tom Hayncs said wben be saw tbe elephant. Now let Lira come !" Tbus they went on, with cooatloss oatba interpperscd, which I dare not even bint at, and with much tbat I could not distinctly bear. i In mercy's name, thought I, what band of ruffians has selected tbis holy season and this heavenly retreat for such r&ndernonian riots? I quicken- zi rny gate, and had come nearly op posite ILs tbicK grove wnence tne voice proceeded, C beri my eye caught indistinctly and at iatorrals through the foliage of tbe dwarf-oaks and hickories which intervened, glimpses hfamanor men who seemed to be ia a violent struggle; aad IJ'-ould oe casionallr catcb those deep drawn, emphatic oaths which men incooflict utter wben they deal blows. I dis mounted and hurried to tbe spot with all speed. I bad overcome about balf tbe spate wbicb separated it from me, when I saw the combat ants come to tbe ground, and, after a 6hort strugsle I saw tbe uppermost one (for I could not see the other) ueuru a cry iu iuc aivcu, vi uv cu- est torture : "Enough ; my eye's out !" I waB so completely horror-struck that stood transfixed for a moment to tbe spot vbere tbe cry met me. Tbe accompliees in tbe hellish deed wbicb bad been perpetrated .bad all fled at my approach ; at least I sup posed so, for they were not to be seen. "Now, blast your corn-shacking soul," aid tbe victor, (a youth of about eighteen years old,) as be rose from the ground, "come cutt'n your shines about me again, next lime I corae to tbe court bouse, will yen ! Get your owl-eye in again, if you can!" " ' At this mossent be saw me for the first time. He looked excessively embarrassed, and was moving off wben I called to biui, in a tone em boldened by tbe sacred oess of my of fice and the iniquity of tbe crime, "Come bvck, you brute, and assist me in relieving your fellow mortal wbom yoa have ruined forever." My rudeness subdued his embar rassment in en inatant; and with a taunting curl in the nose, be re. plied: "Yon ncda't kick before you are spurred There ain't nobody there, nor han't been notber I was jist seeing bow I could 'a foul ." So say ing be bounded to bis plow, which stood io the corner ot about fifty yards beyond the great battle ground I went to tne gound from wnicn be had risen, and there were tbe prints of nis two tnumbs, plunged up to tbe balls on tbe mellow earth, aboat tbe dit-iacce of a man's eyes apart; and tbe ground around was broken up as if two tag.ihtt.d been engaged opon it. Great laughter aod applause J Mr. Olekaoai a Hmmp. We bad a lecture on phrenology in Musser's bull a few night ago, from a tajelliog professor of tbat science, aod parts oi it ere quite interesting. He bad on tbe stand several plaster beads mapped out ia torn lots, and after he had explained what the meant, he invited persons in the au dience to come up and let Liu teei tbeir bamps and explain their char acttrs Several times he hit pretty accurately, $sd excited a conridere amount of applause; but after a a hile old Dicksjn stepped p fur aa examination. He is an absent Bund ed mau, and he wears a wig. While difssing himself before coming to tbe lee i ore, Ls bad placed bis wig on the bureau and accidentally tossed his plug of tobacco into it. W&en he put the wig on, it was just lie him not to notice tbe plug, and so wten he mounted the platform he had a lump jaat orer his bump of combat iveuesa as big as half a ben's egg. Tbe professor ugered about awhile orer Dickson's head, and ftbea he said t "We hare here a somewhat re markable skull ; tbe perceptive facul ties quite good, ideality large, benev olence very prominent. Secretive nes U small, and the subject, there fore is a man of candor and frank ness; he commnntcates what he knows freely. We bave also," said the profeeser, still plowing bis hand through Mr. Dickson's hair, "acqniei- tiveness not large ; tbe subject is not grasping, avaricious men, but he gives liberally, he he he , why, it can't bel Yes.- Wby, wbat a tbe ! Munificent Moses! that's the most awful development of combai ivenes4 I ever beard of. " Are you a prize fighter, sir ?" "Pria9 fighter !" exclaimed Dick eon. "Wby, wbat do you mean V "Never oeen a solaier, cr a pirate, or anything like that?'' "You certainly must be crazy," said Dickson. "Ain't you fond of going into scrimmages and rows, atd plugging people oq the noee ?" "Certainly not." "Well, sir, tbea yoar're untrue to y oar nature. The way yenr head is built, qualified yoa, I should say, in a special manner as a knocker down and dragger out If you want to ful 611 your mission, you will devote tbe remainder of your life to battering up your felloe men and keepingyouraelt in one interminable and eternal muss You've got tbe a wfulle&t bump tbat ever decorated a human skull. It's phenomenal. WhatH you t&ka for your neaa ween you aie i utnt.e- men, tbis man is liable at any mo ment to commeoce ragiug around tbe commonitv like a wild cat, bunging with a club or anything that comes handy. It isn't eafa for him to be at large." Then Dickson put Lis band up to feel the bamp and he noticed tbe to bacco. He pol.'ed on nis wig, ana there was tbe plug sticking just be hind hu left ear Then the professor, lokoing at it a moment io confusion, said : "Ladies and gentlemen, we will now tbe lecture is tbat is I bave ao more Boy, turn oat those lightB!" Then tbe audience langnea, ana Dickson pat on his wig, and the professor started to catch tho last train. The science of phrenology is not as . j popQiar iq our town as it was, auu Dickson still remains peaceable. Max Adelcr. Jadglwa- a Senator by HI Looan. Judge Mackey, from South Caro lina, was Hitting in tbe gallery of the Senate wben a sharp-faced, razor strap looking fellow said to bim : Mister, can yoa point out to me tbat infernal Hamburg murderer, Butler, of South Carolina?" "Certainly," said the polite Judge ; "aad I will point out, also, other notables of tbe Senate. Don't you see that hand some Senator with light curly hair ? Well, that is Cooblmg; and the grey headed, bright looking man near bim is Jiiaioe ; mat large aenaior is Judge Davis, of lilincb-: and over there ia General John B. Gordon talking to Lamar. Dou't yoa eee thai bald beaded man," p iiu'iug to Senator Edmunds; "well that , is Butler, of South Carolina" Tbe eyes our Xanece inena were lighted up wun luaignauoa as no replied, "Yes, I could bave picked out of a thoutand" adding a good deal tbat was not complimeutary to tbe " diiUtnguiinhed ermonter. I no other day Senator Edmund came over oa the Democratic aide, when Mr. Vest said: "EJinaud. Hampton has a good j Ao on you," and lim gallant Carolinian was forced to tell tbe whole story, benator lviuni:.u- laughed heartily, and remarked tbat it Mvas a compliment to be taken for so handsome a maa as General But ler. The fact, however, is that Mr Ed.iiunds' face strongly iudicme ijsiipe and wjtdom,; with no trace of mercy in it, unless wbci) bp tail;- iog to Mr. Tburuiuu i:r socio person al favorite, and then U is geLiut at,d plcasQt ag possible. X fair CarliBDs no Rbbrr jr. The other day two eirangera were toasting their shins on eppjxite sides of a big etove ij a ferry wharf sa loon, and it was noticed that tbey often looked at each other as if . al most certain tbat tbey bad met some where before. Finally one of tfceui got up and said : "Stranger, I've seen a faca almost like yours. Did you bave a brother Bill?" '"Yes "Was be a sailor ?" "He was." "Did yoa bear of him last about ten years ago ?" "Yes, jat about ten years ago." "Stranger," continued the firii seeming greatly affected, "I've sailed with your brother Bill. We were wrecked together on tbe Paeific,. and before help came I bad to kul and eat bim. I kuew you must be reiat eij. I'm awfal Eorry it was your brother, and though I was driven to it and tbe law can't tugc caci, ( oi willing lo pay vou damages. B kinder fair with me, for Bill was old and lough. Abut how much dj yoa thiuk is fir ?" Ibe oiber wiped a tear from Liit eye, spat across tbe stove, and re plied : "Stranger, where is year dad ?" "Been dead these twelve years." "Died in Nevada, didn't ha ?" "Yen, out there somewhere." "Well. I killed bim ! I knew you were bis son the minute 1 saw you He and I- wero in a mine, and one day we were going cp in a bucket: I saw tbe old rope was going to break under tbe strain. ' We were up about two hundred feet, I picked up your old dad and dropped bim over. It was bad ou hira but it saved me. Now, you ate my brother Bill, aad I murdered your dad, and I'd gaess we'd better call it even and shake to see who pays for the drinks." They shook, drank and the old lake captaioa who could not tell a lie bad to si back and real za bow sad it was that tbey were born with such tender consciencea. Two Pr to Take a Paprr. Some men, says an excLacge, say tbef re toe poor to take a paper. Now, a pcisdn pinst te reduced to a degree cf poverty rarefy ' seen or known in tbis country when he 'can not put away three cents a week, tbat himself and family may ei j y tbe pleasures and reap to profit to be derived trom tho reading of tbeir homo party paper. Men who expend foO eaca year for luxuries such as whisky ana tobaccoarje not loo poor to subscribe and pay for a p$ per; bat rather than deny them selves to tbe extent of f 2 00 per year, w.ey permit tneir. cnudrcn to grow up in ignorance or all that m trans piring throughout the world ia tbis progressive age. Tney do not seem to realize the great wrong tbey do tbeir families by diayiog tbem a paper. ' ' - .. .. ... i A maa never loas by a little po liteness as the soldier said wben be bowed his head for tfce pan non bill to pass orer. A yoang Udy never wasted the second look on a maa with a limp-y eollar and a soiled shirt front She knows he is married. MaaaMM rolooe! Seloae'a WeMlaf Olft. "I've been a-thinkin' to-day," said Colon;-! Solon as be came into tbe Derrick oSee yesterday "of my old enuua, Joe Blinker. Yoa never know- ed bim. Mean bim were cronies ia the army, an we were the best of frionds ior nigh onto twenty years till he married tbe old it aid Johnson ; that kinder split thj fiu ao( we ain't speke since. "Yoa shouldn't have dropped the acquaintance jast because be got mar rid, Colocel "On, I didn't drop it. 'Twa'n't me, but 'twas all along of a preoeut 1 ftot 'em. Yoa ee a few weeks afore the weddia' Joa come to me an' bcZ be 'Culonel, I knows aabow your a-goin' to give me' some sort of a present, 'Ot course, stz I. 'An" continued Joe, 'if it's all the same jusigive uaeutbin' useful instead of uruauieiital, cr ye might make it uxetul as welt a-t ornamental, ez be Oaly don't give as any gim craaka and hifdluuu wat don't do anv good ' " " 'Joe,' eez I, 'I'll do er. Ycr sen sible to tber las;.' " "Tb:s wuz afore I wuz married, yer, know, audi wuzjast asigaorent ubuut wimmia as a motkey ! cf iuliaa opra. But tniobs i io myself it must be ornamental as well as u ft ful, and I was bound to fill tbe bill. ' Studied on tbat present a whole day and dreamed ot it at night. 1 started onct to bay Joe a boUjack, all painted over with red and yiler ; an' i beu I thinks I ougbter gitsotbiu for tbe bride instead at Joe. At last 1 bit it. Miss Jobnsbn was skinny an' ole so old eb$'d lost all her upper teeth. I saw ber laff one day when I went along with Joe to see her, an' tbat 'ar vacancy below her upper lip, like a bole where a board bad been knocked off barn, jest jagged the idee right into my bead, i got the most beautiful set of teeth yer ever saw. Nice ivory sot ia gold. 'Joe,' ez I to myself, 'Joe, I've hitit; use ful as well as ornamental.' ' "Waal when the day sot ior tbe weddin come I bad the rbumatica and couldn't go. But I got a big card printed with ibe biggest letters in the priniiu' tffice. 'Compliments of Colonel Stone to the bride,' along ibe top, aa' iben I tied the teeth iu tbe middle of ibe card, an' jest below 1 put ibis are sentiment iu big letters which I writ my self : Nature abhors a vacancy, But "tU oor joj au To Lnjw that peuplcitootlilrrpgnroa A. dentist' art can fill. "I tho't 'twas a very neat tenti ment, an 1 repeated it over to myself scv'ial times. Wet!, jer see, 1 sent that card up and the boy stuck it up right iu tbe middle of tbe table jat as- tbe ceremony was buia peif roied an, yer could bave read tbose letters clear across the room. Tbe minister saw them an' he jaat stopped for a t bund au' then weut on as though be wern't sartia of the word:, and somebody kinder snickered, an' tbe brido looked arouud, au she saw it, au' wall, they do say she broke right i.Caudtoro tbat ar kard inter five buudred pieces and chucked tne teeth out tbu back door, aud durued nigb broba up tbe weddiu'.' , "An' that's wty J.e's family aod uiiuo don't Liicb, though saBes alive he didn't get a present tbat day tbat 'u l bave improved the appearance of his hou-ebi id as tbem ure pare ut teeth." Oil City Derrick. " H'O ULD LIKE SOMK HOT. E." Pi.7.l0t!Trt. Jnd., Oct. 3, 1S77. HEUijis Ceecheu. Qoerlin O., (jEXTLEJtKS : When I was In Ohio I bouL'tii gome ol Dr. Tenner's Blood cuJ Liver Remedy and Nerve Tonic at your slorc. I never took anything that did me so much good in so snort a time. I would like to cet some more of il as I cannot find it bere. Will you please let me know wbat 1 can get one-nail uoz.jn bottles lor, and oblige. Yours truly, MARY MKDBOURX. Dr. Fenner's Blood and Liver Rem edy and Nerve Tonie may well be Called "Tbe conquering hero" of tbe times. It is the medical triumph of the age Whoever has "the blues" should take it, for it regulates aud e hlora the disordered ejstem that irives rise to them. It always cures Biliousness and Liver Complaint, Jaundice, Dvspepsia, Constipation, Headaches, Fev eh and Ague. Spleen Enlargements, Scrofula, Eryip la-S Pimple-, Blotches and all Skin Eruptions and Blood disorders ; Seiled Limbs and Diopsy ; Sleep lewnesn, Impaired Nerves and Ner vous Debility ; Ueutorea flesh and strength wben tbe eystcm is rnuniog down or going into decline; curea Female Weakness and Cnronic Ivheuoifjtisqi, and relieves Chronic iironcbitis, and all Lung and Throat difficulties. It does theae things by stnkiug at the root of disease and re moving it causes. Dr. Fenner's Improved Cough Hooey will relieve aoy cough in one hour. Try a eample bottle at 10 cents. Dr. Fenner's Golden Belief cares any pain, as Tootb ache, Neuralgia, Colic or Headache in 3 to 30 minutes, aod readily relieves Ilbeumaii.sm, Ividuey Complaint, Diarrhoea, etc. Try a sample bottle at 10 cents. Dr. Fenner's St Vitus Dnce Spe cine. One bottle a! ways cures. Jror ale by C. N Boyd. Itarbrtigeraof Spring;. The nsp on even d-j!Ur Uisters i worn ff, aud theie is a neat fringe oo tbe bottom jf too irout-era' lc-g. II luelj giils v b have bad a sue cte.-ful Si.-a.soo, buy up ibeir wedd ug clothes aud get married before sum mer. Flirtations begin. We always noticed tt'et ht taely firls marry iu tbe spring aad preity ouoi in tie euiujier. Tbe small boy grows superlatively kaacy, aud refuees to take bisnulpbur and molarses uolecs be is' rewarded by a nickel ; tbis merely tbows bis Gobucial acumen. Hens tbat bave been lo&fiog about all winter "on tbeir oars," when egs Were rty cents a d z-n, show a dii-putjti jd to glut tbo market at ten cents. Tbe housewife decides th&t too new carpets are needed, and because she can't get them, pounds tbe old ones to pieces out in the back yard. bellows wun shabby overcoats leave them at home add bravely shiver down the strcpt ia tho chilly wind. Tbe oldest inhabitant begins his series of lies about planting peas in January and picking roses in .VJuruh Grocera work iff their surplus ''brown Havana" as maple uer. pure and undented. Tbis is not only a harbinger of spring, but an evi dence of totaj depravity and a dispo sition to "sweeten" the public "Great clearing out sales" spring cr ou every tide, a: d yon can buy so; thing yo don't want alrjiica looaly Ijw pruek Tbe advance guard of tbe soase-Af legion flutters bis wijga ia the batter, and dies of chilblain." OLD TE HOUSE. E AS, A SPECIALTY". HEAD QXTARTERS ma FANCY and STAPLE GROCERIES, FI1TB TEAS, AND RARE and CHOICE COFFEES. J. R. JENKINS, 28 Fifth Avenue, Pittsburgh, Pa. OLD HOUSE SPECIALTIES. Tie CslEnratefl Girta Grcn Tea! QuarantMd absolutely pare. Tie rascr Itadi nzs ! Best in th. World. Took Fir Medal at Farl EipoHUon. Tls CsltMsl Ssow Biri Flour! For extreme Wbite Bread and Putry nse. ImkUur Breal In Sand 8 b. uackarea. ready lor bakln. Tim Cora's! Helm (Mg Tbis lKllck)Oj Co (Tee Is Vnrlvatea for Its Delight ful arptna. Tte raacr Fraicl Ccffss' A barb mixture or itAOE Coffee. Immrted ail Every Variety Fancy Cneew. TfisMla aiMityFriits! Tti Pare Vermeil Maple Sm TU tat Variety iff Injcartm Wt Goals! TEA.! THE ONLY HOUSE IN THE CHI THAT KEEPS A FULL LINE OF THE CELEBRATED PRICE OF TEA. THE NEW CROP. YOUNC HYSON," Per pound. 40. M. (0. SO, ERlAlrf cents, ti.uo, J1.JU, ill.). uqii mr cm J AP AN i-r fnnl 4u.Vi.00 M eenfa. and 41.00. ENCUSH BREAKFAST, Per iund. 40, lu, tto, to cenu, a; 2. ! rc'!nti:.norFIVECEVrSrr roml"!!! do unuwej on au urtien oi I ivs roi mw or Tea. Via -nilin a written order for Tea, don't faU o mention tbe eualie yoa desire, and vrice. r All the Teas quoted above at tl.OO per pound and upwards arc the Gari Okowh Tbas. If to detirtd. mill pack aay of ' th a boat in m or 10 to. oottM wttnout extrm rnarae. IliVS J16T Km'KIVKD AS lSVOICBOrYKRT Fauct Cm 1379. F0EMQSA00L0N3 TEA! $1.03 tf GOOD TEAS AT LOW TRICES t a GUNPOWDER IMPERIAL TOtTNO HT SON JAPAN-OOLONO ENGLISH BREAKFAST, SS CEXTS FEB POUND. NO REDUCTION BT ANY QUANTITY. COFFEF! RARE AND CHOICE. THE CELEBRATED DELMQNICO COFFEE ! This delicious IViffee Is nn-rraled for its delight ful Aroma. It all othr Cotlues cave la ilea to please you, i'to this a trial. THE FANCY FRENCH COFFEE! PKICE PEK POOD - - 28 CEXTS. Oennine Mocha Coffee, Planta tion tkiiltm Coffee, Maracaibo Cof fee, OM Dutch Java Coffee. La- gtMira Coffee, African Coffee, Vottta Uvea Coffee, l'ea lterry cof fee, Golden Mo Coffee. A PARTIAL LIST OF GOODS Constantly Arriving. F. Sohamaebir's Oat Meal, Oat Groats, Cracked Wheat an i Orahatn Hour. Mackerel, fcxtra No. 1 Nbore Mess, No. 1 Shore No. 1 Bay, No 2, No. 3 Large, No. 3 Medium In jlb kits.. WASTES WHEAT FLGUB. Cincinnati Hams, Breakfast Bacon and Dried BeeC Keflnal Lnnl in Pallr. 20 lh. 10 !h. 5 lb. and 3 lb. Fresh lVibsters, Salmon, Shrimps and Core Oysters. Cooked Corned Beer and Pressed Tongue PICKELS and TABLE SAUCE. Sugars the best qaaliiy cf each grade. SYRUPS AND MOLASSES. .... .. , i . . Ey YORK gosgEif OH 10 CREAM CHEESE. THE L-EGEST ASSORTMENT OF LiyftW ANP fOILET SOAPS. PURE GPICCQ.. C9LMAN'S ENGLISH tflSTAD. gE!VD FOB CAT ALOOCt ASD PSICS LIST. J R.JEI1 PITTSBURGH, PA. JOHN F, BLYMYEB, DEALER IM Hardware, Iron, Nails, Glass, Paints, OILS, ScO., 5cC. The following ia a partial lUt cf Goods ia Stock : Carpenter' Tools Planes, Saws, Hatchets, Hammers, ChieeJg, Tlanea, Adzes. As., Black, smith's Goods, Dellows, Anrils, Vicos, Files, Hammers, Ac, Saddlery Hardware, Tab Trees, Saddles, Hames, Uuckles, lltogs, Bits and Tools. Table Knives and Forks, Pocket K.nires. Scissors, Spoons and Razors, tie larges st,ck in Somerset Ci unlj Painter's Got dx," a full flock Wbiie Lead, Colored Paints f t ioidandaieite p;iioiiD$r, Paints iu oil, ail clr, Vruish, Turpeuiiae, FUx-td Oil. Bru.-h, Japan Drjer, Walbui S-aiof, Ac. Wiudow Glaus of ail r.izi aod jrlaxs cut to aoy bape. Tbe best Coal Oil always on hand Our stuck t Coal Oii Lsrop-t is ery lre and com prihes Terr elegaut iXj'ea. DustonV Circular, JUuit-y and Cro-8 Cot Saws. Mill Saw Files ul the best qaaliiy. Porcelain-Iiutd" Kettles Handles cf all kinds. SHOVELS, FORKS, Mattocks, Grub Hoes, Picks, Scythes, Soeaths, Sledges, Mason Hammers, Cast Sieel. S'.ep Ladders, Carriage and Tire Bolts cf all sizes. L this Glasses. Wash Boards, Clothes Wringers, Mt-al Sives, Door Mais, B?kef, Tubs, Wooden Buckets, Twine, Rope all tiz-s, Hay Pulleys, Butter Prints! Mop Stick, Traps, Steelyards. Meat Cutters and Stuffers, Traces, Cow Chains. Hal ter Cbains, Sboe, Dust and Scrub Brushes, florae Brushes, Cur ry Cciubs and Card, Door Locks, ninges. Screws, Ltcbes and everything in tbe Builders' line. Capo, Lead, Shot, Powder and Safety Fuse, Ac , The fact is, I keep everjtbiDg that belongs to tbe Hardware trade. al exclusively in tbis kind of goods and give my whole attention to it. P r Boob who are building, or any one in reed f anything in my line, will find it to their advantage to give nie a call I will always give & reasonable credit to responsible persons. I thank my old customers fi.r their patronage, and hope tbis Beason to make many new ones. Don't forget the place. "JSTo. 3, BAEE'S BLOCK." January 21, '80. JOnX F BLYMYER. TO THE LOVERS OP FINE HORSES IiwlsS lo say to th tre Irrs of fto H'irs?s, tfca I it Ul stand my Kcd;ucj- brad lloro CHIEF, at nvy farm tbis season, behmlno; April 1st, at tbe low pru-e ot x to injure a mare witn ioai. i Al.o m Irralt Suilllou I KING, lie Is a sec nd .MIW4JCRin build, with bone anil general make up serand torone inthiseonnty: will be at my Karm duriox Ibe sea.xin. from April th to July 4th, at the low rate otjl to Insure a mure with ioai To old patrons I would say don't fail to see this Horse, as he ls a a-ood one or 1 would not have him. Ills colts are all lirsi class, for pedigre of above Horses, see posters. April 7 P. HEFFLET. LIST OF CAUSES. For trial at April term 1330, commencing 4th Monday In April, (Joth day). 1. William McClellan's executrix, vs. John Anspach Jr s. garnuhees. 2. Levi Uougheoour, vs. Isaac S. Conghenovr. 3. Ann O. Yanert's use. vs. 1. J. Biar. 4. J. O. Kimm'l k rons' assignrea, vs. IJcht. : liter. Coder A Co. ' a. David Koas arl Ed. Schrock, vs. Jobn, Ada line and ornelius Reed 6. Isaac Hugus vs. Ed. Ileott. 1. Hen ry Tllp. vs. Adam Kreutibnrg. 8. amnel weisei, ts Jaoto b. lteal. Sa mnel Meyers' administrator, vs. Henry h ' A V, 1.1DI1IS I 10. David Koas tt Sons, ts Joaiah Brant. 11. Catharine Lohr's administrators, vs. David Ihr. 12. J. O. Kltnmel l Sons' assignees, vs. E. M. 1 Schroelt. i 13. Francis Baer, VS. Daniel Shults. I 14. Jobn Shafer, vs Ludwlck Bruck. ' lh. Moses Young, vs. David A vers. I 14. Barnet Picking, vs. Frederick Naugle. ' I 17. Elisabeth Auman, vs. Abram and PriscUIa I Berkey. i 13. James Leitch's nse, vs. Vrsltut Borough scnooi District. HENRY T. SCHEIX, March 51 Prothowdary. MENTOR. I hereby give not ire tunt 1 will stand my fine 1 black Stallion NCtruR, full three quarter , bluod, at the staole o: Josian Brant, in i Somerset Borongli j during the day throughout the season. Morning and evening of each oay his services can lie had on j my iarm one ana a nan miles norineasi oi Somer set MCSTOR Is a black horse sired hv Heffley s t Imported English Drall llorf'NKKJF.K " He l.-a horse of nus.yle. with lmmenf strength of' bone, and will welvb WW to 1 00 poumls. There : are a number of his colls in this ueighloirhood for I wbl'.-h Ti wore oflered whiie they were still class-1 ed as sucklna colts. i My other black bor-e I will stand at Manns' Choice. Bedford count r, ani In that vlcini y. A large number of bis colts esu j b- seen at Bedford and Everett. Don't fail to see ' these colts hetorc patronising sny o; h-r horse. j " iuarcnz4 Ht..Ki atiitn. I E XEUUTOUS NOTICE I ' I Twp., ( Estate of George Specbt, late of Shade Somerset Co., Pa., deceased. Letters testamentary ia the above estate having been granted to the undersigned, notice is hereby given to those indebted to It to nuke Immediate payment, and those having claims or demands will please resent them duly authenti cated for settlement, on Friday, Ust, day of May, I88O, at his late residence HENRY PENKOD, SAJ1L EL CABLE, April 7 Executors. ifrratseif far mo Inrfnttono, or for ftapwenrrwrs eaeideaf. fKnuUmlar other we ros. frojm sar and Intelo. Cor tat; Aonmtnt, Inttr. ftmuxt, JpptfiU, tfuitlfnr Infrtmjmmtl. 1 alleata aritlngnndtTthePnti mt iMir, prompt Iv attrnilHt to. InenlinnaUuUltmrxmrrm z: !: f'l ' - '1J mitt eases, b pfumU of vs. Jteiag onunit tho C. 8. Patent Tptpdrtneit. awl rngogen i Potent bmtUtem sb rivtirflf, sre e m coser trnrehe. and otewn 'PaUntt mart promptly, or.i vth broader etainr, rltrwrevvetT arr Tfrnmrrrnm nasain7ic9. end l mof tl or' A ft A' of wottr1 device: mt wMkeoxttminntioms andmdvioi tie to paJentahUittf, frre fehmrne. All earmpnndrnee ttrlcfly cm fUlentM. Pn w otr. tnd -VO CHAMU VX I.ES PATEST 1ft secVBEDi ' - CenirtUl.X Kcn,Scv.F.p.Pneer,TUf:crnite- . 'jnMnn ilSiil Rtmt In MHnl-a i ff,. TT 9 I W refer in, WntMnnton, to Bun. PootmatleT tier : Pafcnf (igice, tnA to Senatoriimd Xtirtentati't t CvnQreot: and c-tperiallw to onrdienteineserg Staft in the r'" :od in ran-rla. Aidrtsa I .1111. L I . J PppotUe taunt OJitv, WutMtoi. . O , a I V'TWilt tree. J.B. B. Oaylord C, Cateagsi IU. SPADES, RAKES, FOR SALE GOOD SIXO.XD IIA-VD EN GOES, BOILEKS AND MACHINERY. One 2 Horse Orifflth .V Wedire Portable En sine ami CirruiarSaw .Mill. l.o00 Co One ft) Horse Oritfiih 11 Walge Portubie ji- ' ulue and Circular Saw dill .. W0 CO One lull . Ailliami Double !uriaca Plan in and latcbln Machine ovd 00 One Power Taluter Sinalo urtooe Planinir and iHtclilt Ma iiine 4 3 CO One Roirt-r's Foot uorfu-loa- Machlne(new) .-'.i (i ! Iron r'm-ne Swinic Cut oil Saw (new) 4'J W 1 One ltMtou's loutle te.tred aw trumm jr. lv 00 Uue 36 Horse 8 La iunary Engine witn (Virernor .VJO 00 Ooe a Horse Siationary Engine with OoTernor i O 00 One i Horse Stationary Engine, Boiler and Fixtures 500 0' One 80 Horse L'pright Tubular Boiler and Fixtur s 500 00 One 35 Hoiw Drtupit-'l Flue Boiler and Fixture 44 J 00 One 26 Horse beiok l Flue Boiler and Fixtures 400 00 j One pair 2i Horse Cy iuder Boilers, r nmi ana eonnecuons .......'.v w One 48 Turtdno Water Wheel, with Clearing and Snailing- .) 00 Also a lot o- Enaines, Boilers, Wood working Machinery, Pulleys, Shading, Belting, Cin-uiar Saws, tu, Ke. Address, V. W. 31. K Ala k SON. CvuBCULasD. Mn. Can n?t Liw Freights. April 14 41 1 THE ONLY MEDiCIN E n Tbat Acts at tic Same Tine on Lj THE LIVER. THE BOWELS, and the KIDNEYS. Thte ffreat organs are the natnral clean ers of the sv stria. If they work well, hca.ili will be perfect: tf they become cloctvd. dreadiul diseases are sure to follow wtta TERRIBLE SUFFER!! 8. Dilieusaaas, HeaHaehe, Dyuaepsla, Jata dios. Cons ti pal ioa and Pllea, r Kid ney Complaiata, C ravel. Diabetes, Sediment ia Um trine. Hilly r Kopy I'riaa; or Kken Biatie Pal as aad Acan, ! are developed because the blood is polv.n'.l situ the hnmors that should have been exposed naturally. KIDNEY-WORT writ restore the healthy action and a: 1 1 V Jttrov ing evils will V bantu---! ; nc.itt Uiera and yoa will live bot to antler. Thousands havebeeacored. Tryltandyon w!ll add one mora to the number. Take it aod health wlllonce more clad-h-a your heart. Why sufT?r lonater from tit torment Of anacfilng back? Why boar auctt dlstreaa from Corf inalAd mnA PllM f Why ba ao fearful tweaua ofdla- I oraerea urine t Kro.-rr-WOHTwm enre ya.,j. fry age at oace and be saiinirti: : i.i rfo'n ftvbts emitrmmt arul 0nr!iaffaEsa!;esslx:B3rtsor3'!!cBe. j Yxrr frrwirttHt hr.". or :ri:: 5. 1 il fur tfy&f HiM e-ava ts& A'h'J Jtinr 1. It CTTrtnliiri Lmlt ntota4 plU, 4vuvrt, Btsoot Yv pstrrw, mrd fn.'l 'WTtpUoi, r1nt aad .PrxtlotM t r pmiie vr--r f Vf-.LaMsj irvj FlrrvT 94x, tUti. . InvloMtr.' iiU. A.UffMt I. M. TZZS.X ft CO Detroit, Klclu Tbe Truth la Mighty and will prevail Thousands who have used and been cured are living witnesses to the trn h of our stement,tht SELLER'S LIVER PILLS w III cukk the w.trni c-sol Liver Conipiaiut. Biliousness, Headache arising therefrom. tlve ness. Constipation. Diitinessaad all disorders re suiting from a di eased liver. For sale by all Druggists. Price 25 eenta. K. E. SELLERS a CO., Prop'rs. Pittsburgh P C ft BOYD, Agent Someriet, Pa- SELLERS' 1ITEB PILLS Have been the ttnntari remedy for the rureol Liver Camplalata, 4Mttvsia, vr aad Aiavslek Hraatarksi. and all de. rana-eawtts f the stomach aad liver lor ever ft years. Kead this: "Setters' Liver Hilt cured ' me oi an atiaca oi Liver complaint of eight years landing v m. Kv.ns, Joilet, Ilia. Price. M eu.aboi. R. E. Sellers a :o., propr's.. Pitts burg. Pa. Sold by all druggists. Save Your Children. For eaVeltmg omn from thesrstem. lkollr "raallaB-e-hasnoequal in this or ny ether eoeetry. "One teaNiofol given to a child oi Mr. Bradbury's, expelled -i34 worms In four hours after taking the muicine. Benj. Lvrie. Union Town ship, Pa. Als "expelled 400 worms from my ehild wo years old." VVm. Snrver, Sc. Louis, Mo. Sold by druggists. Priced eta. K. E SELLEUS kCO., Prop'rs, Pittsi-crgh, Pa. Scad tor clnaUrs. Julys - VAWTED; LqcgsT pins Atttcnatki, in Icrge $uarJUUt. Permanent eon'raets would be maile with reli.-i-ble par les who ran furnish regtilarsnpplies. Ad- draee W: A. LtVEKIX) Men-hut Pt!pKtMt UK. ikii.i. w noiFsaie Lnmtie r Feb. Is t-' hla. rev t w i . -o I ' utot A&o OTICE I otice is her shy given to all persons not to fees purposeof hsfclrig, hantlC7glhrbrkc-. nufow ITS ) n, a tn i2.im.jwv. im-.i. . law. I Apr-i JACOB M.WALTER. r vr-r 1 n, TliE Herald Fon 1 8 8 O ! PREPARE FOR THE GREAT 'PRESIDENTIAL STRUGGLE E THAT dCCURS Tins YEAR. BY SUBSCRIBING FOR SOME GOOD PAPER IX TIME r SEEP YCUESELP POSTED C2T THE EVENTS OF THE COUNTY ! ! GET THE COUNTY NEWS'. READ THE ADTERT1SEMENS AND LEARN WHERE TO BUY CHEAP KEEP YCUR EYE ON THE EDITORIAL COLUMNS!! AND SEE THEM BOOH I IP YOU WANT POLITICS, The Herald -is- RED-HOT REPUBLICAN!!! AND A STAf. WAR T of STA L WA ltTS f IF YOV WANT GENERAL NEWS! Tho Somerset Herald CONTAIN AflMfCHXEWS A3 ANT COUNTY PAPER -I2ST- PENNSYLVANIA! IF TOT7 WANT THE LOCAL NEWS, IBE EIEiLD IS IBE PLACE TO FUD IT If hare made ami ngt me i,Cj ly ickieh tXia departnier.t trill not nly b EQUAL ' bufSlCCITBETTER tt- "iu the rjST!. SUBSCRIPTION $2.09 CfIRQArOS! ApORESS, THE HERALD. SOMERSET. PA.