OLD SEfeSfcS, VOL. 21, NO 32 SUNBURY, NORTHUMBERLAND COUNTY, PA.-SATURDAY, MAY 4, 1861. NEW SERIES, VOL. 14, NO. 6. The Sunbury American. PUBLISHED EVEKT SATURDAY BY H. B. MASSES, Market Squar, Sunbury, Penna. TERMS OF BUBS C R I P T I O N . TWO DOLLARS Pr "" to ' paid half year y m advance. No nru discontinued until tu arrearage, .repaid. TO CLUBS. Three Copies to oaeaddreas .! SJ rVT. do. . ' ' .-.r.... H.i do. SU U Five dollar, in advance will py foi threa year's sub scription to the American. , r .w I uitma.irra will plea" act a. oof Ac ente, and frank letter, containing aubcription money. They are peiinit led to do thia under the Po.1 Office Law. TIHMI OF DTIKIIIIS . One Square or Uline.1 1 time., JJ Kvery .ttheea,iienl imertion, JS nerq,uri3 month., J JJJJ Six month., J ii One year, " ' a, Rn.ine. Crd. or F ive line per annum, a Merchant, anil other., advertising by the year, wilh the privilefreof iiuetting different adver- ti.emeut. weekly. ., ty Larger Advertisements, a. per agreement. JOB PKIKTINO- We have connected with our eitahhthment well e tected JU OFFICK, which will enahle u. to execute In the ncntcrt tyle, every variety of printing. B. MASSES, ATTORNEY AT LAW, SUNBUHTT, PA. Business attended to In the Counties of Nor suml.erlatnl, Union, Lycoming Montour and Columbia. References in Philadelphia : Hon. Jnl. R.Tvaon, Cha.. Oihl-m. F..q.. Homer. A Snoda-ran, Linn Smith 4 Co CHARLES MATTHEWS 1 1 o r n c ij a t a vo , Xo. 12S Broadway, New York. Will carrfully attend to Collection, and all other mutter II v atl hii c jittriifttrtl to tin care. Mnv 31. IB58. FRANKLIN HOUSE, RK BUILT AND REFURNISHED, Cor. of Howard and Franklin 'Streets, a fete Squares West of the N. C. II. It. Depot, BALTIMORE- TEnsui, 1 1 rKB Day O. LEISENRINO, Proprietor, July 16, 1?50 tf From Selin. Grove, 1'.. WILLIAM I. MMEBS CHALKLKY ROMERR' G. SOMERS& SON, Importers an J Dealers in Cloths, Cassimeres. Vestings, Taylors Trimmings, &c, No 32 South Fourtli Street, between Market end Chesnut Streets, Philadelphia. Merchants others visiting the city would find it to their advantage to give them a call and ex unine their stock. March 10, 1860 HARDWARE ! HARDWARE 1 1 rUST received by A. W. FISHER, at his Drug Store, Sunbury, Pa., SCOOPS. SHOVELS, FORKS, LOG CHAINS, MILL SAWS, CROSS CUT SAWS. Aluo, .Screws, Butts, Door- Knobs, Thumb Lad-lien, and all hardware necessary for building. A splendid hi of pocket and table cutlery, Sets org, German feilver Spoons. aLooliIng Glauses, A large stock of Looking Glasses, received and for sale by A. W. FISHER. Sunbury, July 17,1858. J. P. SHINDEL GOBIN, Attorney t$ Counsellor at Law BTJNBTJBY, FA. WILL attend faithfully to the collection of claims mid all profea.ional business in the counties of Northumberland, Montour, Union and Snyder, otinael Riven in the German language. EV Office one door cast of the Prothonotary's office. Sunbury, May 36, I860. ly THE INTERNATIONAL HOTEL, BROADWAY, CORNER OF FRANKLIN STREET 3XTEW YORK CITY, ffcr. inducement, to Merchant, and Tourit. vi.iting cw York, uu.urpaned by any Hotel ill the Metropolis t'he lulliiwiuirare among the advantagee which it poues ra. and which will he appreciated hy all traveler.. I.t. A central location, convenient to place, of bu.ineaa, . well n. place, of amusement. idl. ttrrupuloiuly clean, well furnwhed aitiing rooms, ,vith a magnificent ldie. l'ailor, commanding ail exteu aive view of Uniadway 3d. large and .uperbly furni.hed .itling mom., with a nmsmlifiit l'arliir, commanding an exlenaive view of ljfiiudwuy. ... 4,1,. Demg conducted on the F.uropean plan, vmter. vim live in the heat .tyle, with the grealeat ecunon.y Sth. It i. connected with Taylor's Celebrated Saloons, where vi.itors can have their meal., or, if theyde.ire they will lie furni.hed in their own room.. th. The fa:e rved in the galoonaand Hotel i. ac knowledged hy epicutea, to be vuatly superior to that of any other Hotel in the city. .... , With all iheae advantages, the eort of living in the International, i. much below that of any other brat clax Hotel. OILSO.N , CO., 1'roprietor.. A uru.t 4 , 1MM) 1 1 SPALDING'S Prepared Glue, and Shelley. Mucilage Price per bottle and hnivh 45 eenta. " Conlml Elixir of Caliaiya Uark II Ueuziua, for removing " PfiRSVLE AT THIS OFFICE. Sunbury, March 17 I860 A NEW LOT OF HARDWARE & SAD DLERY. Also, the best assortment of Iror Nails and Steel to be found in the county. at the Mammoth store of FR1LINU & GA ANT. Sunbury, Jana 2. 1860. SKELETON 8KIBTS. A T the Mammoth Store will be found a J.X. T6ty large assortment of Skeleton Skirts from seveo hoops up to lOlrty. Oct. 6, 18C0. FRILINO& GRANT. Kerosene Lamps. VVEHY LARGE and cheap assortment will be found at the Mammoth Store of Dec. 15, IS6U. FRILING & GRANT. II O! YE LOVERS OF SOUP! Afresh sunnly of Macaroni and Confectionery at ' 1 J nnn run D I H."IIU Sunbury, June 3, I860. in. Imnuiini ta th LADIES to knowlhst A Friling & Grant, have the best and largest assortment of Dress Goods in toe county. Sunbury, June 3, 1860. A FRESH SUPPLY OF DRUGS at the Mammoth Store. Also, a new lot of per fumery, Soaps and Fancy Article. Very cheap. rKILIKU ti UKAft J . Sunbury, May 26, 1860. JATENT BRITTANIA 8T0PPER8 fo bar bottles for sale by H. B MASSE R B KM Iron. Steel, Nails, Picks, Grub-Hoes and Mason Hammers, at low prices. BRIGHT A BON. Sunbury, June 23, 1880. . Select $j0ctrg. THE PBINTEB BOY. Air Old English Gentleman, I'll sing 70a a song of Printer boy, Whole bright and honored name Standi forth in glowing capital! Upon the icroll of Fame ; Who, in the dayi that tried men's souls, In Freedom's darkest night. Stood mafffully wilh Washington, And battled for the right. Ben Franklin was that Printer boy, One of the olden time. And twai that boy who Dew bii kite To the thunder clouds on high, And brought the forked lightning down From regions of the sky ; 'Twai be who caught the fiery bona And trained bitn to the chose, Till dow he's driven safe by Mono luto the Printer's case. Bkn Franklin was that Printer boy, One of the olden time. Long shall ttao world extol bis name, The Patriot and the Sage ; Who, fully justified by faith, Is ;irored on every page ; His form, corrected and revised, Is now ivdi ked off and pressed; A new edition in the skies, A star among the blent. All honor to that Printer boy, Due of the olden time. And now my brother typos, take This leadtr for your auide ; J-bllow corrected copy, and All errors mark outside ; Be frugal, chaste and temperate Slick to the golden rule. And you shall sbioe among the stars In the printing nj)ice school. Just imitate tnat Printer boy, One of toe olden time. pimtflrmis "jSltelcj. SQUIBE BICHEE'S COW. "Alt', fair in trade." gpacnLtioR. Bidls. 'Good lookiu' cow, Squire Richer. Want to sell!" "Well' 1 dunno. Want to boy ?" "That depends on the price. What'l you sell her for?" "Make me an ofler." "Wall, I suppose she's worth eighteen or twenty dollars. Sooie.wbere about that." "Eighteen or twenty dollars I Land soul, Mr Smith 1 Why, that cow is the red Dur ham Che-hire short born the best breed in the world, you know !" "Sho 1 you don't say so, though, do ye? Strange, now, I didn't notice it. Come from the town of Short Horn, eh ?" "Land soul, no, Mr. Smith. She waa owned by a man by the name of Short Horny, and they called her Short Horn, ye know, cause Horny was too long to Bpeak. The man that raised ber was an English or Irish, I forget which. So you see the cow's a furriner. I reported ber myself from the continent." "Sbo 1 Why, I never ha' beard a word of i It. Kept it private, didn't ye Squire ?" "Wall, yes, rather. Ye see it is the times of the Know Nothing agitation, aod ye know 1 m a candidate lor selectman in our town ; so 1 was afraid if the people found out that 1 was bringing furreo cattle over here, tbey would tarn right oot and spile my election. You know they're down on furriners." Wall, I declare, Squire, you re sharp. But the cow can speak that is, roar English, can't she ?" Sarlin ! Jost like any other eow. And now, neighbor Smith, if yon want to bay a grand good cow, one that'll give twenty-five quarts of milk a day, and make ten pounds of Duller a week, yon will never nave such a chance. Wouldn't part with ber at no price to aDy other man, but you aod I bave alien been good friends and I don't mind sacrificing a few paltry dollars to oblege you. Yon may nave toat Durham Cheshire snort born cow, bred some where in Victoria's dominium, for the sum of forty five dollars. Dog cheap 1" "forty nve dollars I Uu J buuire, yon mast mime i n made 01 money. 1 never can afford to give that. Say forty, and I'd think about it." "Well Mr. Smith, you're a tight band at a bargain, but I won't Btand with you for a few paltry dollars. You may bave tbe cow for forty." " 1 be money is yours." "Tbe cow's youro." There, reader, that's tbe way Mr. John Smith happened to become tbe owner of tbe Durham Cheshire short born "furreo" cow. reported" from tbe continent by James Richer, justice of the peace for Stafford coun ty, Stale of New Hampshire. Now for further particulars. Mr. smith drove bis parcbase home, mnch elated wilh the acquisition, uod when night came be would not permit bis daughter Jane to miiK ids stiori born with the other cows, he must perform tbe pleasurable and highly interesting job himself. Mr. Smith estab lished himself on a three-legged stool at the side of tbe short horn, aod placing a fifteen quart wooden pail at the proper augle com- mencea tne process, lo less than a secool he bad tbe pail brimful ; for tbe short born, not probably relishing tbe slow, old fashioned method of filling tbe pail with milk, concluded to save Mr. Smith considerable trouble, aod accordingly set both ber hind feet into tbe devoted pail, giving Mr. Smith a smart whisk with ber stub tail at tbe same time. Mr. Smith tried to dislodee the obtruding' feet, but, to bis surprise, be found Ibem a fixture. On further examination be found that tbe feet bad quietly knocked out tbe bottom of tbe pail, and tbe legs of tbe short noro were nrmiy nooped together, lie pulled aod bauled at tba refractory legs, but all to no par pose ; they were bound to stick. So Mr. Bmiib as a last resort apolied a batcbet to tba pail, aod rent it in twain. Out flew abort boro's understandings, and by way of examination into tneir gaiety, she let go nrst one and then tbe other against Mr. Smith's ankle-bone. Over went Smith, and tbe three legged milk stool bouncing after nim ble bead Id a fragrant mod-puddle, and bis rest elevated Id "tbe elastle fluid wblcb sur rounds tbe earth." He screamed to Simon Mitdmay, bis hired man, to coma to the rescue but Simon waa engaged iost then in the interesting business of kissing Jane Smith behind the brindle eow she was milking and it was some time before ba responded to tbe call. When Mr. Smith was once mora raited to the perpendicular, be swore a few easy words. looking sadly at tba Dsrban Cheshire short horn, and went in to Mrs. Smith to bava tbe wound bound up. From tbat worthy lady ha received but little consolation. "I alien told joe Stinili," fsi i she "to keep clear of Squire Richer t he's a tormented speculator, and alien will get the best aod of a bargain. lie (tot cheated once, when be married bis wife, and that's soma comfort. Ha wanted to have ma once but good luck I I'd as soon throw myself in that mill-pond aoo committed regicide. Dear sake, tbis cloth ain't half big enough to reach round yer leg. now. Wait till 1 sew it together. 1 alien knew it bas been beat into ma for more'o a year that Squire Richer would gt tbe better of you somehow and now " "Better of ate or Dot," pot io Mr. Smith as bis wife passed for breath "you'll sea if 1 don't fix bim. I'll let him know tbat I ain't a foot yet." "Sbo 1 Yea don't pretend to say you'll try to cheat bim ? Remember Mr. Smith, you're a member of tbe church." "I'll fix bim, I said ain't tbat snuff? I'll have my money back again afore next month this time if 1 don't, then I'll giveyoo a Dew gown." "Wall, why not tell bow yon calculate to do it ?" "Wall, I mean to. Pshaw S a woman can't keep a secret to rest oasy without knowing everything. I'll fix bim that's all." With a wonderful knowing air, Mr. Smith limped out of the bouse, and going to tbe milk-yard, desired Simon Mildmay to step into the sheep bouse with him a minute he wanted to have a little talk. Simon, frightened half to death lest tbe kissing affair behind the brindle cow bad been discovered, obeyed with fear and trem bling. "Simon," says Smith, coming to tbe point at once, "can yon keep a secret t" "Yes, sir." "Wall, do you love my darter Jane ?" "How! Ah hem oh oh, sir. I 1 " Poor Simon's knees began to knock toge ther, and bis teeth chattered io bis bead. "Don't be a fool, Simon, nobody's goin' to kill ye. Speak oot 1" "Yes, sir, I do love ber. I" "Wall, Simon, if you love her, that's well ; but if you marry ber, you've got to work for her. Will you be will ion to do tbat ?" "Try me." "Wall. I want yon to show your love by doing me a little service in an affair I've got into and want to tret out of." "Anything in the world, Mr. Smith, from fighting a duel to killing a wild cat." " xou know squire Jim Kicber?" "To be sure." "He's a speculator aod a cheat, yon know?" ''Your short boro cow shows that plainly enough." "That's it exactly, 8imon, and to tell tbe troth, I don't feel over aod above well pleased about tbat bargain, and if I could only get the better of tbe Squire in some way, I should ba delighted. I've got a plan fixed tbat I think will be just the thing, and all I want is you to carry it out for me." "Say on. I'm ready for anything, if Jane's to be my reward." "Wall, dow barken. Tbe Squire thinks a eight of Dice cattle, and will give almost any price afore he'll lose the chance of getting a valuable animal. Now, I want you to take some paint mind and gut it the 'zact shade and paint short boro's white spots black just like tbe rest of ber. Then get a sharp file aod file her horns off even with ber bead, and after you've got ber fixed, take ber into tbe care, and don't stop till you get to Bos ton. After you get there, write me a letter tbat you are tbe Earl of Derby's herdsman an English name takes, you know and tbat you bave come to America a purpose to buy up fine cattle. Pretend tbat you bave beard of me as one that takes a powerful interest in the improvement of stock, and tbat you would like for me to come to Boston and see a splendid black cow of the no born breeu, which tbe earl bad sent to tbe Mayor of Boston as a present. Just mm tbat, lor a consideration, you would be wilting to part with ber to any American farm, and palm off an inferior animal upon the Mayor. Do you understand me, Mildmay ?" "Perfectly, sir. Go ahead." "Well, when I see Squire Richer, be'll ask me bow I like that short boro, and wbere she is. I'll tell bim tbat my wife thinks she is a handsome critter, aod that I bave sent ber up into Belknap county for better pasturing. Talking of her will bring in tbis other affair bandy, and then 1 will show bim your letter, aod invite bim to go to Boston with me to see tbe celebrated uo-bora. I'll tell bim that I'm sot on baviu' the cow, if she don't cost more than I'm worth, and that'll make bim determined to bave her himself. You must ask aa enormous price at 6rst, but fall down liundred dollars or so, just to make bim think he's cheated ye. Now, Simon, do you think you can do tbe thing op brown 7" xes, yes. if well, I believe you said something about Jane wben you first begun ?" "ao 1 did. well, ir you can make it go, you may bava Jane before cold weather, and tbe money you get for short born will set you np a bousekeepio'. Mind though, aod keep it all to yourself." "I ll be mum." Aod off bounded Simon to give Jane an iufiuite number of bosses, as be took tbe foaming pails from her band to carry them into tbe spring room. 1 be very next morning, before any of tbe family were stirring, Simon, with the paioted cow, was on board tbe cars for Hoston. J be next day's mail brought to Mr. Smitb tbe following letter : To John Smitb, Esq., of Rockhill, Stafford county, N. U. "Dkab Sir : I beg leave to introduce myself as William Bell, tbe berdsmao of tbe Earl or Derby, Derbyshire, England. I am on a journey through tbe United States for the purpose of purchasing choice American cattle, the earl having taken it into bis head that a mixture of tbe English and American breed Is desirable. I have nowlat tbe stable on Green street, a magnificent black cow of the no-born royal stock wbieb my master bas sent by me as a present to bis booor tbe Mayor of Boston. Having beard through your highly respected friend, Richard SteveDs, ol tbis place, tbat you are mucn interested in tbe improvement of tbe American stock, I bave thought tbat it would do do barm to dispose of tbis beautiful no boro to you, aod purchase a good American aolmal for tbe Mayor. Of course you understand this is in confidence, as 1 make tbe offer solely from tbe disinterested wish of serving American cattle. If you should think it wortb your while, I shall ba very bappy tt see you at tbe American sons time during tba present week. "With the highest respect, "Your obedient servant, "William Bsll." "net ba be!" laughed John Smitb, as be finished reading tba cote. "Simon's in for it, do mistake. Good yes. that will do. New I will harness up and make an errand over to tba Squire's after soma cabbage plants : be said be baa a slew of am." Mr. Smitb was soon oo tbe road behind tbe grey mare, aod oo arriving at tba Squire's be found tbat worthy man at work iu tbe k'lnKu. Mr. Smith tied up bit bans sod sprang over the fence wbere his friend was boelng corn. "Ah 1 ba I Good morning, good morning, neighbor Smith. Glad to see you. Fine morning."- "Capital tbe rain night afore last did the business for the crops. Things look flourish ing." "Yes, as welt as I've known 'em to be for fourteeo years corn aod beans, especially. Why, Smith, the corn on my Gov'oor lot is op to a roan's hips." 'Sbo I Well, tbat is large. But how about them cabbage plants ? Got any to spare, eh?' 'Plenty of 'em, Mr. Smitb there In tbat bed. Help yourself. Oh I (after a brief pause) I forgot to ask you aboat lbs cow. How do you like her?' 'First-rate, Squire ; but our pasturing is so poor, tbat I've sent ber op to Alton, to my brother, to be pastured bis pasturing is Dew laod, you know, and the clover knee-deep be says. I was afraid if I kept ber here she'd kinder lose ber flesh and run down ; so I've let bim bave ber for tbe season, and he's to allow me for tbe milk and butter." The Squire looked somewhat sapriBed at tbis favorable account of tbe Durham Ches hire short boro, but be only said : 'Just as 1 thought Mr. Smith. I knew you'd be pleased with the cow.' There was a long paue during which Smitb was industriously oprooting cabbage plants, and transferring them to bis basket. At length, as if struck with a new idea, he called out : "Look here Squire, I'm a good miud to tell you a little bit of a secret. Do you think yon could keep still about it ?' "Sartin 1 Land me, I can keep anything secret. Let's know.' - "Well Squire, I'm a goin' to have a cow that will put every other cow in Stafford county nowhere." "How ? Explain.' "There, read that." M r. Smith pulled Si mon's letter from bis pocket. The Squire read it over carefully, acd when he finished, be exclaimed : "Grand chance, I declare. Come right straight from tbe Earl of Derby's : and yon mean to buy ber, don't ye r "xes, sir. irebe don t go beyond two hun dred dollars, she's mine.' The Squire seemed cogitating. "Look bere, Smith,' said be at length, 'I'd like to see tbis famous cow. How would you like to bave my company down to Boston ?" "The very thing I was goin-- to ask you Squire It was the benefit of your ailvice about the crit ter. I ain't much of a jude of cattle." . There was a long conversation between the two worthies there in the cabbage yard, and it was agreed that they should proceed together, the following morning, to Boston, to examine and decide upon the merits of the wonderful cow. Noon af the next day found Squire Richer and Mr. Smith in Boston, wberi they immediately sought Green street .tuoPo aitJ the no horn. Both the cow and Simon Mildmay were so thoroughly disguised that their owners would not have known them, (particularly no-horns) and Squire Richer was completely deceived. To cut a Ion; matter short, after much bargaining and mutter ing, tbe no-horn Earl of Derby cow, alias the Durham Cheshire short horn, became tbe proper ty of Squire Richer he paying as an equivalent the sum of two hundred and seventy five dollars. Mr. Smith was, to all appearance, almost heart broken at the less of the "splerdid chance' but he hadn't money enough, be said, to pay for her at that price. So Squire Rtcher's cow came back to her old quarters, and was put in the yard wilh the other cows for the night. Unfortunately for the cow, and unfortunately for her owner'a peace ef mind, there eame up a heavy rain during the night, and in the morning, when the Squire came out to look at his purchase he found his bona fide black and white kicking cow awaiting him. Tbe streaks of black paint revealed tbe truth to the enraged Squire, and the 'sell was pretty evident I he way the tallied speculator tore round the yard and cursed him self, the cow, Mr. smith, aod the world in gene ral, would have astonished any one who had ever seen the devout and pious Squire Richer at church. As (or m born, short born, her days upon earth were "few and evil;" for en the going down of the aun the ensuing dsy, she was lying salted down in a beef barrel in ISquire Richer's cellar a barrel of beef at two hundred and seventy-five dollars, and poor at that. Tbe Squire bad the good sense not to ley the matter to heart ; but, although, he is as social wiih Smitb as ever, he never mentions trade in his presence. Jane Smith haa taken 81mon Mildmay as her husband, and she is now, we believe, the mother of two little Mildmays, who are of ceurse, "the exact image of their father." Valuable Tables. Few readers are aware until they bave occasion to test the fact, how much labor or search is often saved by sucb tables as tbe following ; lCOi Virginia settled by tbe bnglish. 1C 13 New York settled by the Dutch. 1620 Massachusetts settled by Puritans. 1624 New Jetsey settled by tbe Dutch. !G'i8 Dulawaie settled by Swedes and Fins. 1C35 Maryland settled by Irish Catholics. 1G3G R. Island settled by It. Williams. 1639.". Carolina settled by tbe English. 16708. Carolina settled by Huguenots. 1682 Pennsylvania settled by Wm. Penn. 1732 Georgia settled by Ogletbrope. 1792 Vermont admitted into tbe Union. 1792 Kentucky admitted Jo to tbe Uniou. 1796 Tennessee admitted into tbe Union. 1802 Ohio admitted ioto tbe Union. 1811 Louisiana admitted into the Union. 1816 Indiana admitted into tbe Union. 1816 Mississippi sdmitted ioto the Union. 1818 Illinois admitted into the Union. 1819 Alabama admitted into the Uoion. 1820 Maine admitted into tbe Uoion. 1822 Missouri admitted into tbe Uoion. 1836 Michigen admitted into tbe Uoion. 1636 Arkansas admitted into tbe lioiou. 1845 Florida admitted into tbe Union. 1845 Texas admitted into tbe Union. 1846 Iowa admitted ioto the Uoion. 1848 Wisconsin admitted into the Union. 1850 California admitted ioto tba Uoion. 1808 MioejMSute admitted into tbe Union. 1858 Oreajon admitted into tbe Union. 1861 Kansas admitted into tbe Union. . Tea Rvssias Cossdl Killid. About nine o'clock on Thursday morning week, Mr. John De Naltback.the Russian Consul, and bis wife were enjoying a ride on horseback in the Central Park, Now York, when the animal wbicb Mr. DeN. was riding took aright, and became wholly unmanageable. Tbe horse ran from the Park to the Bloomingdale road, and thence down Broad way at a furious rate, Mr. De N. having relin quished the reign and clung to the neck of JJie animal. At Forty-ninth street, Mr. De Nattback was thrown from his saddle and fell bead fore most to tbe pavemeut. He was immedialely picked up and taken to tbe Twenty-second Ward Station-house, where medical aid waa procured, but death ensued witbiu half an hour after the accident eccurred. His lady followed, the runa way horse, and reached the spot wbsre her bus band waa thrown a few moftreiij after be had bees takea le the station. Cruise of the Folly Ann. BT ARTRMDS WARD. In overbaolin' one of my old trunks tba totber day, I found tbe follerin' jernal of a vyge on tbe starncb canawl bote, Polly A no, wbicb happened to be tbe eubicriber wben I was a young mao (io the Brite Lexington of yootb, wben tbar aint do sich word as fale) oo tbe Wabash Canawl : (Monday 2 P. M.) Got nnder wa. Hobs es oot remarkable frisky at fust. Had to bild fires under 'em before they'd start. Started at larat very suddent, causin the bote for to lurch vilenlly and knockin me orf from my pins. (Saler frase.) Sevral passenjers oo bored. Parst tbreu deliteful country. Hon ist farmers was to work sowin korn, & other projuco in the fields. 8urblime scenery. Large rod betted gal reelinin on the baoks of tbe Canawl, bathin ber feet. Turned in at 15 m in its parst eleven. Toosdy Kiz at 5 and went op on the poop deck. Took a growo person's dose of licker with a member of tbe Injianoy legislator, which ha onbanely insisted on allowin roe to pay for. Bote tenrin threu the briny waters at tbe rate of 2 Note a hour, wben tbe boy on tbe leadio boss sboutid, "Sale hoe I" "Wbor away?" hollered the capting, clear in his glass (a empty black bottle, with tbe bottom knock! out) and bnngin it to bis Eagle eye. " 'Bout four rods to tbe starbud," screamed tbe boy. "Jes so," creecbed tbe capting. "What wessel's that air ?" "Tbe Kickin Warier of Terry Hawt, and be darned to you !" "I, I Sir 1" hollering our capting. "Reef your arft boss, splice your mane jib-boom, aod bail your chambermaid ! Wbal's up io Ter ry Hawt?" "Yon know Bill Spikes ?" sed the capting of tbe Warier. 'Wall, 1 reckin. He kin eat more fried pork nor any man of bis heft on tbe Wabash. Lie's a ornament to his sex 1" "Wall," continued tbe capting of tbe Kickin Warier, "Wilyim got a little owly totber day, and got to praocin around town on tbat old white mare of bisn, and bein in a playful mood, be rid np in front of the Court 'us whar Old Judge Perkins was a boldin Court, aod let drive bis rifle at bim. Tbe bullet didn't hit tbe JuHge at all ; it only jes whizzed parst bis left ear, lodgin in the wall behind bim ; but what d ye spose the old despot did ? Why, be actonally fined Dill ten dollars lor contempt of Court 1 Wbat do you think of that?" axnd the capting of the Warier, as be parst a long black bottle over to our capting. "Tbe country is indeed in danger !" sed onr captain, raisin tbe bottle to bis lips. Tbe weasels parted. No other incidents tbat day. Retired to my chased couch at 5 minits parst 10. (Wensdy.) Riz arly. Wind blowin N. W. E. Hevy sea on and ship rollin wildly in ennsekents of peppur coros bavin bin fas tened to the forrerd hoes' tale. "Heave two 1" roared the capting to the man at tbe rudder, as tbe Polly giv a friteful toss. I was sick, an Borry I'd cum. "Heave two 1" repeated tbe capting. I went below. "Heave two!" 1 beam him holler agin, and stickin my bead out of tbe cabin window, hev. Tbe hosses become docile eventually an 1 felt better. Tbe sun bust out io all bis Bplender, disregardlesa of expense, and lively Natur put in her best licks. We parst tbe beautiful village of Limy, which lookt sweet indeed, with its neet white cottages, loBti toots and other evijencea of civilizashnn, incloodin a party of bald beded colored men who was pUjin 3 card monty on the stoop of the Red Eagle tavern. All, all was food for my 2 poetic sole. I went below to breakfast but wittles bad lost their charms. "Take sum of tbis," said tbe capting, sbovio a bottle tords my plate. "It's whisky. A few quarts alien sets me right when my stnmmit-k gits out of order- It's a excellent Tonic I" 1 declined tbe seductive flooid. (TburBdy.) Didn't rest well last night on account of a uprore made by the eapting, who stopt the Bote to ashore and smash in tbe windows of a grosery. He was bro't back in about a hour, with bis bed dun up in a red bankercber, bis eyes bein swelled np orful, and bis nose very much out of jint. He was bro't aboard on a shutter by bis erne, an deposited oo tbe cabin floor, the passenjers all risin up in their birtbs, pushin the red curtains aside & lookin out to see wbat the matter was. "Why do you allow your push una to run away with yon in this onieemly Btile, my misgided friend ?" sed a solium lookin man in a red flannel nite-cap. "Why do you sink yourself to the Beasts of the field ?" "Wall, the fack is," sed the capting, risin himself ou tbe shutter, "I've bin a little prejoodiced agio that grosery for sum time. But I made it lively for the boys, Deacon ! Bet your life !" lie larfvd a short, wild larf, and culled for his jug. Sippio a few pints, be smiled gently upon tbe passenjers, sed "Bless you ! bless you 1" and fell into a sweet sleep. Eventually we reached our jcrney's end. Tbis was in tbe days of Old Long Sigc, be4 tbe iron boss was fouled. 1 bis was be4 steembotes was (,-oin rouod bustio tbeir bilers & sendin people higher nor a kite. 1 bem was haDDV days when people was intelligent 4 wax Aggers livin wild beests wasu't scoffed at. "O date of ma boyhood I'm drearuin u ye nawl" ' (Poeckry.) A. W. WiMtnei. Nn.uvr.a f In-run v.PhrA ia Pari.ian dandy, who, we think, rather outdid Connecticut. C had at his residence a com plete costume of a groom. When offering an attention to one of the fair sex used to say t 'Per mit me to send you a Douque: ny iny black aer. ..n Vim lit an rftiril to hi. varrnL took nut bis blacking bottle, polished his face and bands, put on ui. livery aim uv mo iuj . "Here," be said, are some flowers sent by my master to madame. He bad spent the last five francs in tbe purchase. Madame was so delight ed wilb tbe present, that she presented a louis to tbe bearer. Tbat is a clear pocketing of the dol lars, and a lady' favor into the bargain. Aa Amiabls Pkcoliabiti. The Cuban wo naUA trait nf character ao noble that Ma dame Le Vert declared she could not refrain from mentioning it i "They msy never speak ill of inch other, hut always find some palliation for the errors of their own sex." This a good trait in the fair Havauese. Would tbat weccald con scientiously say as much of the fair Americanese. Do you belong to thia church, sir 1" queried a genlleinau to a friend who wa one of the hea vy men of the town where tha other wa visiting, and who seemed much interested in lbs church where they had just beon attending. No sir," replied the rich man, 'quite the leverse, for tbe church belongs to ma." At wbat time of day was Adam created ! A little before Eva. Boys and Tobacco. -A sensible writer ad ministers a wholesome dose to boys who ose tobaceo. Indulgence io tbe filthy weed has utterly ruined thousands of boys, inducing a dangerous precocity, developiog, softening and weakening ef the bones, and greatly injuring tbe spinal marrow, tbe brain, and tbe whole nervous fluid. A boy wbo early and frequently smokes, or io any way ubfs large quantities of tobacco, never is known to make a man of much energy of character, and generally lacks physical and muscular as well as mental energy. We would particu larly warn boys wbo want to be anything iu the world to shoo tobacco as a most baneful poison. It injures tbe teetb, produces a mor bid condition of the throat and lungs, com promises tbe stomach and blasts tbe brain and nerves. Those twelve years old speci mens of Young America wbo strut about tbe streets at the hind end of a long Dine, ought to be regularly spanked aod put to bed by their mammas. One Morning a party came into the pub lic rooms at Buxton, somewhat later than UBual, and requested some tongue ; tbey were told that Lord Byron bad eaten it all. "1 am very angry with his lordship," said a lady, loud enough for bim to bear the observation. "I am sorry for it, madam," retorted Lord Byron, "but before I ate the tongue, I was assured you did not want it." A "Conundrum by indication," must bave cost a good deal of labor : "Why is a bee-hive like a bad potato ? Because a bee-bive is a bee-bolder, And a beholder is a spectator, And a speck-tater is a bad potato." Tub Worst Form of Hanoino. An ex change gives tbe substance of tbe verdict of a recent coroner's jury on a man who died io a state of inebriation : "Death by hanging around a rum shop." "I say, Sambo, can you answer dis conun derfum ; s'pose I gib you a bottle of whiskey corked shut wid a cork ; bow would you get tne wnisKey out widout pomn do cork or breakio' de bottle ?" "1 gives tint up." "Why pish de cork in. Yah, yah." farmers' department About the Garden. Tbis week and next will be a buev time in the Garden. The season has been quite backward, and tbe ground continuing cold, few seeds would have been benefited op to the writing of this arL'cle, (Thursday 18th.) Our asparagus first made its appearance on tbe 15tb, which is sb much as a week after some. seasons, and three days after last sea son. It is time, now, that some of tbe usual garden crops should be io the ground, and most oi toe rest put io within the present month. We shall therefore make a few sug gestions aa mere reminders as to what we bave to do in the Garden. Peas. The first crop is in and np ; the second crop might be Early Frame, which should be in by this time. Tbis should be loiiowed by tne Uwarr Blue Imperial, Large White Marrowfat, Tom Thumb, Champion of England, and Eugenie, at ao interval of a week. These will give an excellent succes sion for tbe Beason. Horn Carrot for soups and stews, ia the earliest and best. Drill in rows. Radishes. The Long Scarlet is the best for the first out door crop, to be followed "by tbe Yellow Turnip and White Summer; tbe two tatter are wen calculated lor hot wea ther, when others do not perfect themselves. Turnips. Early Flat Dutch is the best to sow for tbe Erst crop. Cabbaoes. I'laots or tbe Early York and Green Curled Savoy, can be set out at any time. For late planting tbe Flat Dutch, Large Late Drumhead, acd Drumhead Savoy, are the best. Those wbo desire two varieties, aod tbey are generally suQieieut, tbe Early York and Drumhead Savoy, Bbould be selec ted. We rarely plant other kiods. Those wbo raise tbeir own plants of the Savov. should sow the seed at once. Tbe best pro- vecuou against ids ravages 01 tue ny, is ao application or two of oil-soap water, not made too strong say half a pound dissolved in a bucket ol water. Tomatoes. Except persons wbo bave their regular conveniences of hot beds, it is cheaper to purchase Tomato plants than te raise them. Tbey ought Dotjjto be set out much, if any, before tbe tenth of May. Bkkts. The Early Blood Turnip, and the Long Blood Red are the best. I'be seed of tbe former should bave been sown two weeks ; tbat of tho latter at any time. Tbe plants may be set out tbe first of May. Beans Tbe Bunch or Snapsbort should be sown io drill early ia May. As a Pole Boan the Wreu's Egg is a superior variety. Lima Beans, by tokiug a small piece of sod, reversing it and plantiug two or these beans in tbe roots, and placing it under glass, in a pot, will hasten tbeir growth several days To protect tbe Lima from rot, to which it is very liable, grease the beans before planting it is a sure remedy. Lettucs Plants Irorn cold frames, can be set out at any time, like cabbage plums, to bead. Spinnah can be sown at any time, in drills. It is tbe best and wholesomest "greens" cul tivated. Cklrrt should be sown at once. We like tbe White Solid the best. As a rule, Celery plants are set out loo late. Tbe last week in June is better tbao tbe first and second weeks in July. Oi course, fur some time, until the young plants bave commenced to grow, tbey should be protected agaioat tbe sun from 9 to 5 o'clock. Oa-RA, SALSlrV, CUCUMBER, ic, should 00W be put io tbe ground. Tbe herbs, sucb as Sweet Marjoram, 'iu vug, Summer Savort, Parsley, Sauk, fcc, should be sown forth with, if oot already done. Strawskrhir. Old beds should be over hauled, thiuned out, bare places supplied, aod all grass acd weeds removed. New beds should be made without delay, Varieties, like Hovey's Seedling, which are oot rampant growers, produce best wben planted in beds three and a half feot broad, tbe plants one foot apart each way. But rank growers, like Wilson's Albany, should be planted tbree feet apart each way, in large beds. Tbe second year, tbe bills or stools should be left about one foot or thereabouts iu diameter, all the intermediate space being cultivated, and all runners beyond tbat limit removed. Tbis will leave a space between the stools of one foot. Raspberry, Currant and Goopkkkrry Buds should be carefully forked over, aud a top-dressing of good stable manure applied. This will turn auder tbe grass, and the ma nure, followed tba latter part of Msy with s heavy mulching of refuse of almost auy kind, will keep tbe soil moist, cool, and free from weeds, wbicb is all-important to insure an abundant crop of these fruits. Uermantoitn 'J'tltgraph. A GooiiHv'hitewaah. The Chtmical Gazette contains tba follow ing excellent receipt for a whitewash, or a wash of various colors : Whitewash is one of the most valuable articles in tbe world when properly applied. It prevents Dot only tbe decay of wood, but conduces greatly to tbe healthfullness of all buildings, whether of wood or stone. Out buildings and fences, when Dot painted, should be supplied once or twice every year with a good coat of whitewash, which should be prepared io the following way : Take a clean, water-tight barrel, or other suitable cask, and put ioto it balf a bushel of lime, slake it by pouring water over it, boiling bot, aod in sufficient quantity to cover it five inches deep, aod stir ft briskly till thoroughly slaked. When tba slaking bas been effected, dissolve it in water, and add two pounds of sulphate of zinc, and one of common sail. These will cause tbe wash to harden, and pre vent its cracking, which gives an unseemly appearance to the work. If desirable, a beautiful cream color may be communicated to the above wash, by adding three pounds of yellow ocbre ; or a good pearl or lead color by tbe addition of lamp, vine or ivory black. For fawn solor, add four pounds umber Turkish or American, tbe lutter is the cheap erone pound Indian red, and one pound of common lampblack. For common stone color, add foor pounds of raw umber, and two pounds lampblack. Tbis wash may be ap plied with a common whitewash brush, jstid will be foood much superior, both iu appear anoe acd durability, to common whitewash. llOW TO MAKB OOOD WHITEWASH rOR IN DOORS At the request of many subscribers who have not read tbe previous volumes of tbe Agriculturist, we bere republish the di rections given two years Bioce for the best whitewash we have ever nsed. For a moder ate sized house, say 8 rooms, about thirty three lbs. Paris white, sod one lb. best white glue needed. Dissolve the gloe io bot water ; also make a thick wash with tbe Paris white and hot water, aBd add the dissolved glue and sufficient water to make tbe wash of the proper consistence. As tbe mass stiffens over night, it is better-to mix each morning wbat is wanted during the day. If left over night, warm, or add bot water to make it limpid. The Paris white is chalked cleans from its impurities, acd is only a very pure whiting better than is ordinarily used for making putty. We obo tbe Cooper Gloe, which is considered tbe beat here, but any good white glue will answer. It costs here 50 cents per lb. at retail, and tbe Paris white 3 cents par pound. Both articles can be obtained io al moat every city or village. The above makes an excellent whitewash, clean and white, and not easily rubbed off. Its first cost is more than lime wash, but is more durable, and for Dice rooms it is far preferable. Stewed Beep. Housewives wbo are in the habit of using ooly steaks and roasts, make a great mistake. A capital dish may be made out of the "chuck," as the butchers call it, or the beck, when well prepared. Select a piece of meat aa large as the demand of your table may require, wash it well to remove the blood or soil from tbe outside, have your dinner pot perfectly clean, salt and pepper tbe meat well, lay it in the bottom aod cover it with water ; boil it from two to three hours, or till it is thoroughly tender ; add balf an onicn, a sprin kle of sage, thyme or summer savory. If tbe meat is fat, let tbe water all stew out a hali hour before it it put on the tablo, and wben your meat is browned well on tbe lower side in tbe gravy, torn it over and brown tbe other side. When ready, take it np, add a little flour thickening to the gravy, or if you have a dredge box shake tbe flour into tbe hot gravy aud brown it, then add boiling wa ter, and you bave a dish equal, and to my mind superior to tbe common roast beef, up on boarding-house tables. Care muet be used to turn it; and equally necessary is good judgement in having it thoroughly well cooked Mrs. Gag, in Field Fotes. Coal Ashes Coal ashes are said, by some wbo bave tried experiments with them, to be excellent for putting arouud tbe roets of peach trees and gooseberry boshes io the spring. Tbey are generally held to be of no use wbatevor, but as they contain some tra ces of potash and considerable lime, tbey will no doubt tend to destioy grubs and worms. Coal asbes do doubt possess some fertilizing powers ; but tbey ere excellent in lightening heavy soil, and answer a good purpose in trenching for grapes, to place above tbe bot tom rubbage. Io garden avenues we prefer it to any other material. Remove the soil, if necessary, aod apply from four to six inches of coal ashes, then roll. You will have a cleao, dry walk io less than five minute of. trr it is done raining. The frost, too, never aflects it injuriously. Ed Tel J Land Measure. One acre is comprised in 208 feet square ; balf an acre in 147 feet square ; fourth of an acre in 105 feet square ; an eighth of an acre in 73 feet square. Kvery furtuer by observing tbis rule can set off any of these quantities of ground without trouble. O'crmuutoim Ttlegroph. Grain Product op an Illinois School District A correspondent of tbe Prairit Farmer gives tbe following statistics of tba grain grown last ysar in a single school dis trict in Lee county, Illinois, as gathered by tbe teacher. "District No. 3, (our miles south-east of tbe city of Dixon, contains 24 families, and an area of less tbas two by three miles. Number of bushels of wheat, 24,692; corn, 41.428 ; oats, 12.586 ; barley, 1,947 ; rye, 533 ; buckwheat, 483 ; cloverseed, 182 ; potatoes, 2,084. Bad Milk and Butter in Winter- It is said tbat wben cows are allowed to eat the lit ter which is thrown oot of borse stables, iin. pregualed as it is wilh liquid manure, tbeir milk aod butter wi" be tainted with the taste, in the same way tbat tbe flavor is injured by eatiug tnruips, but to a more disagreeable de. gree. If litter is allowed to be eaten, it should only be given to other eattle, and oot to niilcb cows, which should have nothing but tbe sweetest and puiest food. To Wuiten Linkn. Stains occasioned by fruit, iroja rust, aud other similar causes, may be removed by applying to tbe parts injured a weak solution of chloride of lime the cloth having been previously well washed or t'f soda, oxalic acid, or salts of lemon, in warm water. Tbe parts subjected to this opera, lion should ba subsequently well rinsed iu loft, clear, warm water, without soap, aud be immediately dried iu the suu. To RuMovit Ike Sfun A domestic re. cetpt fur extracting iuk spots from colored articles of limn, wool and similar fabrics. It is aimply to rinse the part so stained in fresh, milk, changing the milk as often as necessary until the stain disappears. Al a finale, wash, out tbe milk in pure rain-water. . -