NEW SEMES, VOL. 12, NO. 5.
SUNBURY, NORTHUMBERLAND COUNTY, PA. SATURDAY, APRIL 30, 1851),
OLD SERIES, VOL 19. NO- 31
The Sunbury American.
PUBLISHED EVERY SATURDAT
BY H. B. MASSEB.
Market Square, Sunlury, Pernio.
TKRMOPaUB8CBlPTION.
TWO DOLLARS P annnm to b paid half
y7n ,1v..Ic. NorAr diKontii.ud uulil all arrearages
'l'u- to CLUBS:
Three Copies to out address .'.", J S
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Five dollsr. in advance will py fot ihret year'i lub-
W;:.Awm'e,.ct s.m., Apmf.nd frank
WXuiniw .ul,.crip.ion money. &. ... p-uul
1 to do llui under tli. Post Uflice Law.
TElt)ll OF iBVEBIIinO
.)ne Square of 12 lines' 3 limes,
V.verv subsequent inaettion,
i no
S3
3 uo
6 00
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a uo
ejm Square, J inoutht,
?IX HMtlllhi, - .."
$kl?h.&to?'Z' v'esr
Willi tl.e privilege of mseltlllgdltlerentadvcl.
(dements weekly. ,
W Larger Advertisements, as per agreement.
JOB tRINTINO"
We have eonneeted with ear establishment a wall se
tested JOB OFFICE, which will enable us t eccut
in th. neatest .tyle, every vantty of printing-.
" a. B. IA3SEH4
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
ECSTBURY, PA.
Busines. attended to in the Conntie. of Nor
humberland, Union, Lycoming Montour and
Columbia.
Refermeet in Philadelphia !
Hon loh R.Tvson. Chns. Giblions. Mq
Somen Snnditrass,
LI1111, Smith k Co.
IIIUK,OIL & LKiTSIKIl STOKE
D. KIRKPAT11ICK & SONS,
No. 31 Smth. Third Stieet, between Market mid Chesnot
Streets, PHILADELPHIA,
Ton.ule Ppa.iih Hides, Pried and lted ; Dry end
V tlreen Salted Palna Kipps, TANM-.US' OH.,
NKIIS' AM) 01' Kill Kits' TOOLS, and Reneral assort
ment of Leather, Finished and in the Hough.
ALSO RKD SOLli LBATHEU.
All of whici will be sold low 'lor Cash, or the anal
C'nr All kii.di of t.mlher in the Rrnifih wanted, for
whn-h the lushest market pric. will be given, 111 cash, or
taken in exebsnjie for Hides. ...
Leather St. .ml free of Charge.and Sold on Commission.
I'hiLdelphu, July a, 1M ly
HARDWARE ! HARDWARE ! '.
SUST received by A. W. FISHER, t bi
lrug Store, Sunbury, Pa.,
SCOOPS. SHOVELS. FORKS, LOG
CHAIN S, MILL SAW S, CROSS.
CUT SAWS.
A lo, .Screws. ButtK, Door Knob., Thumb
Latched, and .11 hardware necessary for building.
A splendid Ut of pocket and tabic cutlery, Scis
sors, German feilvcr Spoon.
Locking CJIsiskcn.
A large .lock of Looking Classes, received and
for .ale by A. V. FIsHEK.
Sunbury, July IT, 1858.
patet WHEEii ;ri:ise.
rlHIS Grease is recommended to the notice of
l Wagoner., Livery Stable keepers, &c.,aa
being Svpkbioh to anything of the kind ever in
troduced. As it does not gum upon the axles
- ia much more durable, unci is not affected by
he weather, remaining the nme in summer uf
in winter, and put up in tin canister al 37 J and
',5 cents, for sale by A. W. FlsHER.
JulvS4, I80S.
wtTirT irrs iiuv isxo as
N. il KLLIN'GS,
.Yo. 12 Xorth Whtirre.1, Philadelphia.
1011,000 lbs. Dried Apples,
3,000 bushels Pea Nuts,
6(10 barrels (ireen Apple.,
UtlO holes Oranges,
'2H0 boxes I.cmoi.s,
2,0(10 bushels Potatoes,
1,000 bushels Haans,
100 do. Pickle.
Mao Kaisina, Figs, Prunes, 4c, in store and
lor sale at the lowest prices.
April 10, ,SM ly
GXLBEPwT 3TJLS01T,
Ml'CCKSSOB TO
J O. I AMPUE.L & tO., ASO L. IVES.
(Formerly No. 15 North Wharves.)
li:LEItIN PllODUCE, FRUIT AND VE
tJl'.TAIil.ES, No. 4 North Wharves, 4lh door
Market street, Philadelphia.
Oranges, Apples, Dried Fruits Butler,
Lemons, Oninnf, Mercer Potatoes, ( heese
Ituisins, Tomatoes, Sweet Potatoes. Beans,
Pea Nuls, Peaches, Cranberries Lgs, &.C.
Orhers fjr shipping put up with care and dis-
fjf OOODS sold on commission for t armers
11. 1 Dealers.
October '-'4. 18!)7.
SOLOMON BOYER.
ATTORNEY AT IjA-W,
Ollic in Market street, opposite Weaver'. Hotel,
SUNBURY, PA.
Collc-.ion. attended to in Northumberland and
adjoining CumiticB. I. acquainted with the
erinan language.
Kkfkbesci w
H. J. Wolvcrton, Esq., Sunbury, Pa.,
ieo. F. Miller, Esq.. Lewisburg. Pa.
J. H. Ziegeufus, Philadelphia, Pa.
BenjaininKainerer, "
Sunbury, lug. 14, 1858 ly.
Illacksiuiliiing.
JAMES T. BEEN.
BUNBURV, PA.,
RESPECTFULLY informs the public that
be has commenced the above business in
Sunbury, and U prepared to do all kind, ofblack
mithiug U order, including horseshoeing in the
est style. .,. . ,
He will alo put up iron railing in th. most
pproved style d patrern.
Country produce taken in exchange,
hunbury; Oct. 16, 1858 tf
FURNITURE POLISH.
Ri.f8 Premium Patent Enamel Furniture
olisii. TUi polish ie highly luable for resto
the polish on all kind, of Furniture, Gla.
sfri.g. Bodiee. IhU Cloth, tt. Al., for re.
oring .POU, hiding cratches, &e &e. War
nled to dry immediately and retain IU gloss.
k. 50 et.. per bottle. b(v FISHEU.
July 17, 1851 J
BLANKS! nL4XK$l
I LANK Deed., Mortgage., Bond., Warrant.
AttachmenU,Commitmenta, Summon.,8u
aas. Execution., Juetic.' nd Con.t.ble.
, Bills, Ac, cVccan b. bad by applying at
1 office.
KCKLESof arioue kind., Lob.ter., Bar
dine.. cVc.,oVc.,jut received nd for sale
DrugSTur'. of A. W.FISHER
lunburr.Augast, 1ST. ly
AD VV ARRANT- The bighe.l pric.
Select $j0drjj.
GO FEEL WHAT I HAVE FELT.
A young lady of New York wag in th. ha
bit of writing for the Philadelphia Ledger,
on the subject of Temperance, fler writing
was full nf nnthnn una Avir.rA.1 sunl, Hoon
emotion of soul, that a friend of her accused
her ot being a maniac 011 the subject of tem
perance, whereupon she wroto the following
touching lines :
Go feel what 1 have fult,
Uo bear what I have borne
Sink 'neath a blow a fatbff dealt,
And the cold world's proud scorn j
Then suffer on from year to year
Thy sole relief, the scorching tear.
Uo koeel aa I have knelt,
Implore, beseech aod pray
Strive the besotted heart to melt, '
The downward coarse to stay,
He dushed will) bitter curae -side,
Your prayers burlesqued, your tears deSed.
Uo weep as I have wept
O'er u loved father's fall
See every promised blessing swept
Youth's sweetness turned to gall ;
LiTe's fading flowers strewed all the way,
That brought nie up to woman's day.
Go see what I have Been,
Behold the strong man bowed
' With gnashing tooth lips bathed in blood
And cold aud livid brow ;
Go catch his withering glance and see
There mirrored bis soul s miscy.
Uo to thy mother's side,
And her crushed bosom cheer;
Thine own deep anguish hide ;
Wipe from her cheeks the bitter tear;
Mark her worn frame and withered brow
The gray that streaks her dark hair oow ;
W.th lulling frame aud trembling limb ;
And trace the ruin buck to him,
Whose plighted fuitb in early youth,
Promised etornul love and truth,
Hut who, forsworn, bath yielded up
Tlmt promise to the cursed cup;
And lod her down through love and light,
And ull tlmt made he promise bright ;
And chained her there, 'mid wast aud strife
That lowly thing a drunkard's wile
And stamped on childhood's brow, so mild,
That withering blight the drunkard's
child.
Go hear, and feel, and see, and know
All that my soul hath felt and known
Then look upon the wine-cup's glow,
See if its beauty can atone
Thiuk if its flavor you will try,
When all proclaim, 'lis drink and die I
Tell me I 1IATK the bowl
Hatk is a feeble word 1
I liOATlIK AHH0K .MY VERV ROl'L
With strong ijisci'.t is stirred
Whcti 1 see, or hear, or tell,
Of that Dark BEVERAGE OF HELL!
' NEVER WAIT FOR A WIDOW.
II V BI DLtV COSTtLLO
CHAPTER 111 Continued.
Mrs. Diaper, having read ber friend's let
ter, expressed in her turn the "pride and hap
piness" with which she received Mr. Hip
grave's visit, and, true to ber old vocation of
housekeeper, insisted upon exercising that
hospitality on her own accouDt, which, while
in ul ice, had been ready for all comers, at the
expense of the '-elderly single gentleman,"
whose legucy, together witb her perquisites,
she was now enjoying. To this mode of pro
ceeding, M r. llipgrave, of course, made no
objection, being inclined thereto by various
reasons, not the leat-t stimulating, being a
certuin amount of "peckithness," superindu
ced by an early and somewhat frugal break
fast. He was, moreover, one of those who,
without having ever beard of the axiom,
"Sino Uaecho et Cerere, friget Atuure," un
consciously adopt it as their rule of conduct,
in love atl'airs, and always a tack the heart
through the stomach.
Anything ethereal will do for the diet of
lovers either iu or only just out of their teens
but for such as have arrived at years of dis
cretion, something more substantial is neces
sary. The nectar aud ambrosia of Mrs.
Diaper, and Mr. llippruve consisted of a uice
little huod of pork and greens, a batter pud
duiir. some toasted cheese, a pot of half-and-half,
(the 'mexzo-o-nicr.r.o" of Madame Pas
la,) and a boltie of currant wine, eventually
superseded by more than one tumbler of
hot gin-and-water.
Over the viands and I heir adjuncts the con
versation soon subsided from mortality and
grew into intimacy. Without dwelling too
much on the relations subsisting between Mr.
Dagsbaw and himself, Mr. Hipgrave made
such use of the information he bud gleaned at
the "Cocoa-nut and Gridiron," as left no
doubt on the mind of Mrs. Diaper that tbey
were on the most familliur terms with each
other. But Mr. Hipgrave was omioeutly
candid.
"If there was a fault in bis friend Bngshaw,
which he could hardly bring himself to be
lieve, it was, perhaps, that be was too fond
of encouraging very young uieu : there was
one, now, au idle fellow, named Trundle, qaite
a movey sojoy b. hoped Dagsbaw wouldn't
get into trouble aloog of bitn, but be was
afeared of it ; however, it wasu't ony aflair of
bis (Uipgrave's) and, therefore, he would say
no more about it. lafuct, be didn't know
bow be came to mention tbe youog Teller'
name at all I"
Innocent Mr. Hipgrave I Of coarse not.
Yob bad not the slightest intention of preja
dicing Mrs. Diaper against Mr. Trundle, in
case be sboald turn up too soon ! But, up to
tbe present time, all was safe ; Mrs. Diaper
had never "beard tell" of tbe yooog man ; tbe
agreed, too, that it was a pity Mr. Bagshaw
should take up witb "movey soojies" what
ever tbey might happen to be, no good, she
supposed ; "but after all she believed be was
as good as gold, and perhaps the reason was
to be found at home, for bit wife, the knew,
bad a tamper I"
Mr. Hipgrave perfectly eoncided witb Mrt.
Diaper, and, catching at tbe word "wife,"
torned the conversation at once to the mar
ried state, topio always agreeable to listen
ers wbo are unmarried.
"Temper," laid he, "it everything. If I
was ever to marry" be looked bard at tbe
widow at be adroitly advertised bit condition
"if I was ever to marry, it's the very first
thing at 1 shonld go fer. Tbe object of mo
ney it no object to me in comparison. A
bad temper it a thing that plays Old Arry
with feller's 'appiaett I Tboagb I lay it, I'm
lamb in tbat respect myself. You, too, I
should iy, mum, wai of the best of tem
pers." TLii last assertion was ratbet bazatdout in
the presence of Mrs. Diaper's formidable
black eyebrows, but she received tbe compli
ment as though it was perfectly ber due, and,
encouraged by tbe success of bis remark, Mr.
Hipgrave made an easy transition from the
charms of tbe lady't mind to those of ber per
son. Tbe plunge was now fairly over, and
witb an eloquence peculiar to himself, Mr.
Hipgrave proceeded at once to lay seige to
tbe buxom housekeeper. What he said upon
the occasion need scarcoly be repeated. It
wag tbe old story from tbu time of Lambacb,
He, iu love, the first deceiver,
down to "Captain" Johnson, wbo has just for
feited not only his faith but bis recognisances.
Not that Mr. Hipgrave practiced any very
remarkable deception, save in tbe way or per
sonation ; and b. reconciled himself to that
by thinking thul he was quite asgoodacutcb
as the mul Simon Pure, whose nose, he was
of opinion, be bad put completely out of
joint.
Whether tbis was positively tbe case or
not, wo shall uot at present audertake to sny,
but it was clear that his advances were uot
entirely rejected, or be would scarcely have
ventured upon so close a proximity to the
dark moustache as any one might have noti
ced who chanced like Mrs. Diaper's maid
to catch a glimpse of the ex butier's attempt
to salute that lady at the moment of taking
bis departure, alter tea and niullius, and soo
ther tumbler of toddy. Neither is it likely
lliut Mr. Hipgrave would have bent his stops
hoinewurd in such a state of pleasurable ex
citement as to have mistuken the way to his
lodging, and found hiinneH' in the Cinder cel
lars in Maiden lane, from whence, when be is
sued, at two iu the morning, be was for an
over hilarious demonstration, playfully exhi
bited in the punching of a policeinau's bead,
conveyed to tho station at How street, to
dream, if be could, of the widow bo felt so
certain he hud won.
CHAPTER IV.
HOW MR. HIPOIIAVE HOT INTO A SITCATIOK AT
I.SST, HLT NOT TIIK ONE UP. KXPKCTKD.
It was late on the following afternoon, be
fore the charge of assault preferred by police
man O, 3(35, against Betjamin Hipcruve,
"laborer" as, greatly to the ex-butler's dis
gust, be was described iu the police sheet
was brought before the magistrate ; and hen
be was at lust discharged, with a fine of 20s.
and a severe jlecture, he hud such a racking
headache that there was nothing to be done
but to go home aud get to bed, to sleep off
tbe effects of bis intemperance. He slept
Bouudly enough no unusual occurrence after
passing a uight at "the 6lation" and wbcu
he awoke at an early hour on tbe second
moroiug after bis iuterview witb Mrs. Diuper
Memory, "tbe wurder of the brain," lutd re
sumed its duty and perfomcd its functions so
so faithfully, that the tirol thing Mr. Hip
grave thought of was having premised to re
peat bis visit to Thistle Grove on the day be
fore and hav.ng, moreover, failed to keep bis
word.
"it don't much matter, though," be said, as
he removed his nightcap ; "ufter wbut has
took place between me and Mrs. 1., I can
soon make that all straight. However, 1
think" be continued, proceeding to dress
himself "I think I shall give ber a look in
tbis morning and fix the day ; but billo
what's this? Why, 1 declare to goodues9,
somebody's took aud gone and given me a
couple of black hies. I thought my hood
didn't ache for nothing. What on earth's to
be done now ? 1 can't go and see M rs. D. iu
Ibis condition. That pelleeco affair p'raps
would come out, and then wbere should I be?
I must write and tell her I'm hill ; but tbeu,
airuiu her fondness might bring ber up here.
What shut! 1 do? But first and foremost I
must get rid or these bies. Brown paper nod
vinegar's good a bit of raw rump steak's
belter no matter, I'll try 'em both. Bless
us, to-morrow's .Sunday, the very day tbat
Hugshaw was to bo back ; I'll send her a
nolo directly aud chance it. Aftei all, Mrs.
D.'s a widder, und line fellers like me dou't
come in her way every day. 1 can uflord to
wait till to morrow."
'Having como to Ibis resolution, Mr. Hip
grave set to work on an epistle which, he flat
tered himself, would set Mis. Diaper quite al
ease about bim. To impress her the more
with a sense of his valmi, he alleged, as bis
excuse for not calling, that he had "unexpec
tedly" and still was engaged with "hismau of
bisiiess," bat that 011 .'Sunday morning he
should be free from "those liammles," eud
come to claim he couldu't for his life avoid
using the phrase again his "adoring" bride.
Having hired a messenger lo convey his
letter, Mr. Hipgtavo'g next care was bow to
remove from his countenance the nfarks of
the fray with Policeman O, 3f5, whose ox
like knuckles hud so defeatured bim. He
hud recourse lo the remedies which experi
ence, we are sorry to suy, bad taught him
were useful ou these occasions, and passed
the day iu rather a damp sort of state, alter
nating between beef and brown paper. To
wards evening be experienced some relief of
mind, for not only wus the discoloration con
siderubly removed, but bis messenger bod re
turned bringing a verbal answer to his letter,
to the effect that Mrs. Diaper would be ex
tremely banpy to see bim next day to dinner.
and hoped be would be puuetual to one o'
clock. "Poor crelur," said Mr. Hipgrave, when be
was left alone, "I know'd bow it would bo.
I sbau't 'urry myself. Diuuer must wuit till
1 come and so must tbe widder."
But, while Mr. Hipgrave was solacing him
self with AInacc r-like reflections, events
bad taken place of a vary different character
from those be was indulging in.
It will not, perhaps, be forgotten that when
the Tbeseut of the pautry left Dronesford, an
Ariadne remained, at be supposed, to weep
ever bis perfidy iu tbe persou of Miss Susau
oa Sweeting. But it bat also been shown
tbat Miss Sweatiag'i aBeclioos were not so
irrevocably the ex butler's as Mr. Hipgrave
imagined. To tell tbe truth, ber heart bad
long been given to Mr. Thomas Trundle, and
tbe tight which were tbe accompanimenl to
ber ititcb, were beaved for tbe fascioauug
but snubbed young man.
Oo tbe day succeeding that on which Mr.
Hipgrave withdrew tbe light of bit counte
nance from Dronesford, Miss Sweeting came
to sudden resolution. She bad an aani liv
ing near London, wbo was very fond of ber,
apd bad often urged her to give up ber uncer
tain calling aid go and live witb her. Su
sanna, however, bad preferred independence,
strove bard to secure it by her own efforts,
tbo.gb hitherto with bat little success, it
was not with the intention of relinquishing
ber profession, but witb tbe hope of learning
tbroufb some mutual frieods, what bad be
come of ber lover, tbat the now resolved to
pay long promised visit to ber aunt. 1 ie
moment was favorable ; tbe spring assicei at
Dronesford were over ; tbe Easter holidays
were approaching ; bnsiuess was very dull ;
in short, Mist Sweeting easily persuaded ber.
self that there was .very reason io tb. world
wby the should indulge ia tbe trip. Her ar
rangements were soon made, and wilbio
f.w boon after her determination wai Ukeo,
SuiaoD wn isfely deposited at the suburbia
residence of ber aunt, wbo welcomed ber af
fectionately. It was some time since the relatives bad
met, and there was, of course, a great deal to
talk about. The damsel bestowed her confi
dence upon tbe elder lady, but, after the usu
al custom in such cases, by not declaring all ;
wbile her aunt, wbo was equally communica
tive, had also ber own reservations. It hap
pened tiugularly enough, that tbe reticence
on both sides related to the same iudividnal.
T.bus, Susanna acknowledged her partiality
for Mr. Thomas Trundle, but never snid a syl
lable on the subject of Mr. Honjainin Hip
grave; for this reason, chiefly, that the gen
tleman bad made himself contemptible iu ber
epes, and she had no desire to figure in the
character of a Forsaken One.
Mrs. Diaper yes, the aunt of Miss Sweet
ing was that stout, black browed well-to-do-personage
Mrs. Diuper, we say, refrained iu
like manner from adverting to Mr. Hipgrave,
partly because she had begun, on reflection,
to regret lliut she hud given bim any encour
agement, and partly because sho bud begun,
on reflection, to regret that she had given
him any encourngement, nnd partly because
pho was ushiimed to mention to Susuuuatbat
the thought of chunging her condition, al her
time of life, had ever crossed bur mind. Hut
while Mrs. Diaper withheld the avow ul of ber
own weakness, she tried to atone for it by
showing full indulgence for that of Susanna,
and seut her neice happy to bed, with the as
surance that, if money was any consideration
in the affair witb Mr. Trundle, she would take
care it should be forthcoming. Mrs. Diuper
ulso took counsel with her pillo that oigbt,
aud finally concluded, before she slept, the
next morning she would honestly aud fairly
make a clean breast of it.
When the day came it happened to be
the 21st of March the auut and niece met
each other with cheerful faces, each prepured
for the further discussion of their respective
plans. BrcukTabt was still ou the table, and
M rs. Diuper was stirring her ninth and penul
timate cup of tea' preparatory to "unbosom
ing," wheu the not very "ucat haudjd
Puiilis" made her uppearunce wilh a letter iu
ber hand lor bur mistress.
"The postman is earlier than usuul, to-day,"
observed Mrs. Diaper.
"l'lease'm," replied Pbillis, "it aiu't the
post, it's one of tbe red shirts ; he laid it was
giv' to him by the gint as wua here the doy
afore yesterduy, Mr. Jp "
Mrs. Diaper burst into a violent Ct of
coughing, which drowned the conclusion of
the seulenr, aud the exercise, or something
else, made her cheeks glow like scarlet.
"You may go," said Mrs. Diaper, us soon
as she bad recovered ber breath ; and the
uuut aud niece were again alone, looking ut
each other witb a singular expression on the
countenances ol both.
"1 meant to have told you all about it, my
deur," said Mrs. Diaper, who was the first to
Bpeuk ; "uud before 1 reud this letter 1 will.
You mast know, SusaDna, that Mr. Hip
grave "
"Mr. Hipcrave ! ' screamed Miss Sweetine.
j "gracious goodness, aunt, what do i.u know
; Hootii Dim T xou don t mean Mr. Hipgrave
' of Dronesford, surely ?"
1 "The very same," replied Mrs. Diaper.
I The difficulty, now, wus which should bo
j the first to unburden herself of ber secret, but
, the elder ludy led the way, aud entered iuto
ull the particulars of Mr. Uipgrave's recent
. visit, while Susanna listened in speechless
; uo, uot quite speechless attouishmutit, for
her ejaculations of "Well, 1 never !" aud
, ' Did you ever?'1 were frequent,
i "Aud now, Susan," said MrB. Diaper, when
; she had liuished, "tell ine your 6!ory."
i "Well, auDt," she replied, "I'll give you
; letter for letter ; but you must read mine first.
: It's a mercy 1 didn't tear it when I picked it
out of my shred basket as I left borne. I
j thought I wouldn't leuve it lying about, aud
i so put it into my pocket. Here it is."
j The tale was now told, acd Mr. Uipgrave's
' letter to Susanna reud with scornful emphasis,
! but whatever the uiece felt was mildness itself
lo the sensations of the aunt.
! "A paltry rascal !" the latter exclaimed,
i "to thiuk of writing to you in that niauner.
I A muii of bis years, too ! Only let me catch
I bim hero again 1"
I "Stay, auut," said Susanna ; "he has treat
! ed you differently, no doubt; you, perhups,
', may change your mind when you have beard
' what he bus to say I"
M rs. Diaper made no answer, but pushed
! Mr. Hipgruvu'. still uuopened missive across
j the table.
I "Reud tbat, too, my dear," the said.
1 It wus read, uud re-read, and on each occa
sion Mrs. Diaper's auger iocieuscd full fifty
per cent.
"do be thinks everybody is ij lovo witb
him, does be '!" she exclaimed ; "he'll fiud
himself iu the wrong box before he's much
older I Wbal can he mean about big man of
busiuess, Susan ? Has tbe fellow got any
property !"
"If ho has, aunt," replied Susanna, "it will
be good news to some of tbe people of
Drouesford, for though I only stuyed there
little better than four-und twenty hours alter
bu wus gone, I beurd quite enough about un
paid lulls ol the leuu s ilhat he Is said to
have bud the uiutiey for, and supposed to have
kepi iu 111s own pocket."
"How cutue my old friend, Mr. Bagshaw,
to send him here. 1 wouder ?" suid Mrs. Dia
per. "Tbere'B something iu tbis thut wauls
clearing up."
A discussion thereupon ensued betweeu
Mrs. Diaper and .Susanna, and it was at lust
resolved tbat before the "red shirt" took back
no answer to Mr. Hipgrave be'sbould be dis
patched to the "Cocoa uut and Gridiron," to
learn if Mr. Bagshaw bad returned, as was
expected, to town, and, in tbat case, to beg
ue wouiu step out to Thistle Urove as loon
as convenient. While the messenger r.otb
ing lotb to earn a good day's wages was
gone, tbe ladiet resumed the themo that wai
uppermost io their minds, aud fouud by ac
cident, an additiouul iucentive for doing 10.
Mrs. Diaper was a reader of the 'limes, "at
per hour," mid as she was in the habit of
taking her, "Accideuts" and "Police," as it
were, medicinally, at the period perscribed by
the newsvender, she began to read tbe broad
sheet at loon as it wai placed in ber bands.
Sbe bad not been eugaged io thit occupation
more than two minutes, wben the uttered a
loud exclamatiou, aed tbe paper fell from
ber baodi. Susanna startled in fright,
tbiukiug ber aunt wai suddenly taken ill, but
the loon undeceived.
"Tbere'i more about bim," cried Mn Dia
per, pointing to tbe journal. "Wto would
have thought il I Why. be'i been a murder
ing of a policeman.'
Mr. IJiucraves enoruiitv. at the reader
knows, was not quite so bad as tbat, though
enough to damage bitn for ever at Thistle
Ureve, even u there bad been ootblug else
against bim.
Drunk and fiehtiue. battered, bruited and
"bad op," wbile pretended to be engaged 00
auaire whu nil "man 01 ouiinesi V
There, in tbe Timet, were tbe whole
particular!; nothing ipared, aolbiog waoling
to establish bit identity.
While this new topic was being hotly dis
cussed some hours 1. t r tlinimrj was gone
and dinner over news arrived of the return
of the "red shirt," und witb him Mr. Bug
shaw, wbo, fortunately for all parties, except
perhaps, Mr. Hipgrave. hud relumed from
Essex a day eooner than he had anticipated,
nnd, his borscs having hud n good deal of ex
ercise, was at liberty to obey the summons of
Mrs. Diaper.
Into the particular of the cchdrcissemtnt
which followed bis arrival we need not enter.
Mr. Bagshaw soon found out how mutters
stood ; be bad beard of the lo? of the loiter
he wrote, and could explain that ; his young
friend, Trundle, moreover, had told biui the
night before that, his affections being enpup.
ed clescwhere, he hud made up his mind not
to havu anything to do with the "widder ;"
und Mr. H. was too much a tn.111 of the world
when he saw Susanna and found out whof he
was, to hint at any ulterior purpose in the iu
troduction he hud proposed to Mr. Trundle.
Nevertheless, he could not avoid mentioning
that the young man who I ad "a lung in his
hedd" wus the individual who sighed for and
was sighed ufter by Miss .Sweetuinp, uud if
agreeable to the Indies lie would bring bitn
out to Thistle Grove next day.
Not only were the ladies "ugreoBble," but
Mrs. Diaper insisted thut Mr. DuKahuw and
Mr. Trundle should come over rally and lul;u
dinner ; and this point settled, the trio begun
to consider in wbut way they should punifh
Mr. Hipgrave.
"I'll leil you what, aunt," said Susanna,
after vuriuus propoMlicns had been marie und
rejected. "Ask him lo come here und dine
ton, just as if nothing hud .happened. We
can then expose hirn nicely before witnesses."
Tbis course wns adapted, aud henco the
message which the red shirt delivered, to
greutly to Mr. Uipgrave's satisfaction.
Sunday morning came, und the hells had
not left off tolling lorchnrch before Mr. Hag
shaw and his young friend were safely housed
at Thible Grove. 'J'hu lovers' quarrel was re
conciled tho moment they saw each other;
indeed, it had been a settled matter the night
before, even to the amiiunt which Mrs. Dia
per mount to give to set up her niece aud her
future husband in a business in ber own
Leighborhood, with tho promise of all she
had in revernion. Sunday came, also, to Mr.
Hipgrave. He could have wished the to
kensofarow were still too evident on bis
features in spite nf the remedies he had so
diligently applied. However, he determined
lo put the best face he could on the matter,
and ifanythiog were said about bis braises,
attribute them to a convenient lump post.
it wai about twenty minutes pust one
when Mr. Hipgrave, with the nir of a lord
and master who felt, as Sir Gilts Overreach
says, "cock sure," sauntered up to the garden
gate of Mrs. Diaper. He bad almost beeo
given up, and dinner Lad been put on the
table, when a ring at the bell told the ossem
led guests that their victim was ot hand.
All except Mrs. Diaper hurried into the
back parlor, the door of which was left slight
ly a jar, aud Mr. Hipgrave tillered the apart
ment. "I'm afeared I've kep yon wuiting, Mrs.
D." he suid, as ho glanced "round him aud saw
ber ample preparations for dinner; tboucb
bis mir.d wns too much confuted, in spite of
bis swagger, to taku in tbe additional knives
and forLi', which indicated anything but a
tele a tele.
"Ob, dear no," said the ludy, bridling, at
his evident assmaiice : "J should have wuited
all duy till you 1 umu."
"Sbnuld yon, though ?" said Mr. Hipgrave.
"But in course you would, after what's took
placo between us. Put ruther seedy this
morning, Mrs. D. ; overdone with bisuess, my
love; if it's all the same to you, I'll take a
glass of wine before ! set dowu to dinner."
"Oh, pray do, Mr. Hipgrave," returned
Mrs. Diaper, in a voice of suppressed passion
which tho ex buller mistook lor tho trepida
tion of love "pray do, pray belp yourself."
Mr. Ilipgruve did as hu wns bid ; poured
out a glass of cherry and swallowed it, with
out even drinking the lady's health ; he then
lock another, aud becomine somewhat war-
j mer uud more animated by the process, pro-
I i.rnou.l tn l.im.lf 4 a .. I ' .
I '""" ,,u.aiT,i iu vu&u soirmuiiiig else 10
iu fact, to repeat the eulute with which be
had tuken leave ou the revioug Thursday
vveinujr. ue auvauceu lowsnls Mrs. Dia,
j per witb thai cordiul and amiable purpose,
j but by this time the ludy's rage at his into-
lence had reached its culminating point.
We have said that Mrs. Diaper was a per
soo of some bulk ; we might have added Ihut
uuture hud endowed her with considerable
strength ; and when we observe thut she lent
the wkolu weight and force of which she was
CHpuble to the box oo the ears which she be
stowed ou Mr. Hipgrave as he approached
his face to hers, it will not be considered sur
prising thut the ex butler staggered half-way
across the room under its inffction. Indeed
he only saved himself from tumbling by
catching ut the handle of the inner room
door ; but he did this iu on evil moment, for
the door itself fluw open, aud wbo should h I
see betore him but Mr. Hugshaw, Mr. Trun
die, aud Miss Swnetniug j
He was overwhelmed with aslouisbmeut
and consternation, and which way to turn
j was beyond the power of his faculties. He
was, However, spared much consideration, for
M r. 1 homas I rundle, who baJ on rid grudge
to pay oil besides the new one, seized hi in by
the collar, and shook him so violently for u
few minutes thut scarcely a breath wus left
io bis body. 1 Leu the ludy of the house
broke out upon bim, then Siisunna threw in
a gibe, then Mr. Bagshaw hoped bis eyes
were better, aud then, making a football of
him down lo the very gurdeu gate, Mr.
Thonfas Trundle kicked him into the road,
and disposed him at full length on a couch of
roadside mud.
As be was picking himself np, there was a
pause iu the laughter from the party at No.
1, uud the front window being thiowu open,
he beard the voice of Mil. Diuper utter these
worus ;
"J'be next time you're invited to dinner,
especially if you're going to be married, ask
the first person you meet if it happens lo be
Tub First of April."
Elisba Poller, member of Congress from
Rhode Island, on beiuj abused by tooie ill
maunered member of the Ileus, rose and
laid j "Mr. Speaker, wben 1 am at home
associate witb gentlemen, but wheu I come to
tbe Congress ol the United Slates 1 am obli
ged to afe.nci.Lit ai:fh cnMi 1 1. . 1-
choose to tend here."
Tbe mm wbo travels a thousand miles in
ft thousand hours ma ha tnlur.i.u
footed ; but be isn't touch to tbe woman
tbat keeps up wilb tbe fasbiont.
"Sally," laid a yooog man to a damsel wbo
bad red bair, "keep away from me, or you
will set me afire." "N'n ,lnr nt ii,.t
the antwer, "yon are teo green to burn."
A Short Pulogis. Sentimental yoatb
"My dear girl, will you ibare my lot for life V
Practical gi:l "How large is your lot, ir?''
iD n m oroit
5
Kiddi' Maloney's Cat.
Matthew Moloney, belter known by the
boys of tbo mill as "Father Mat," on relum
ing from woik oue evening, was no t at ib.i
gate by Biddy, h.s belter half, iu a high
state of excitement.
"Mat," says she, "there's a strange cat iu
the cabin.
"Cast ber out thin, an' don't be botheriu'
me about the baste."
"l-'aix, an' I've been slhrivin' to do that
came lor the malher of ten minutes past, but
she's just beyout my rathe, behinl tho big
red chist in the coruer. Will yez bu ai'ther
belpiti' me to dhrive htr out, Mat V"
"To be sure I will, bad luck to thecousate
sho bus for mn house ; tbow her to me,
liiddy, till 1 tucho her the riFpicl that's due
to a man in his own house lo be In leu' pos
session wid out as much as by your lave, the
thule o' the world !"
Now Mat had a speciul antipathy for cats,
and never let pass un oppoi lunity to hill oi.u
This he resolved to do in the present case,
aud instantly formed a plan for lint purpose.
Perceiving but one mode ol egitss for the
unimal, ho suys to Hiddy :
"Dave yez iver a mule bag ia the house
me durliut?"
"Divil o' wan is there, Mat. Yez ti.U it to
the mill wid yez, ta bring home chips wid,
this mornin' !''
"Faix, au' I did, and there it is yit, then.
Well, have yez nothing ut ull in the bouse
that will lie up like a bug, Biddy ?"
"Trotb, an' I have, Mut, there's me Sun
day petticoot ye can dliraw tho sit ings close
at the top, an' sure it will do btllher nor
li.tlin' the cat be laviu' yez."
"Biddy darliot, ye, u jewel lo be thinliiu'
of that same ; be uflher bring i u' it to me."
Biddy brought the garment, und when the
strings were drawn close it mude a very good
pubstitute for a meal bag, aud Mat declared
it was "illegaut."
So holdiug it close against tho eJgo of the
chest, ho took a look behind aud saw a pair
of bright eyes glaring ut bim.
"Au' is it there ye are, yo devil ? Be oat
of tbat now; bad luck to all yer kin, yo
thavin' vagabone ye. Bedad, au' ye won't
lave my bouse at all thin wid perlile axiu' ?
Yer self-will bates a pig's iutirely. Biddy,
have yez any but wather in tbe bouse ?"
"Vis, I've a pliuty, Mat, tbe tay-kcttle'i
full uv it."
"Be afiber castiu' the mattber of a quart
thin behint the chist, till 1 say bow the ehay
divil takes it."
"Hould 'im close, Mat, bore goes the wa
ther." Dash went tbe water, and out jumped tbe
cat into Mat's trap.
"Arrah, be the bowly poker, I have 'im in,
Biddy," suys Mat, drawing close tbe folds oi
tbe gurment ; "now, bud cess (o yez, ye thafe,
its niue lives ye bave, is it? Be afiber axin'
forgiveness, lor tbe thavin' ye have been
doin' io me bouse, for I'm tbitkin' tbe nine
lives ye bave won't save ye now, any woy.
Biddy seize hoult of the poker, an' whin I'll
sbouiuei tbo bavthun ye'll bate Ibe daylights
out o' 'im."
Mat threw the bundle over bis shoulder,
and told Biddy to ploy "St. Patrick'! day iu
the morning" ou it. Biddy struck' about
three notes of thut popular Irish air, and
tuddeidy stopped, exclaiming :
"WhatsaiilU so quare, Mat? It's lalan
tne britb uwuy wid the power uv it. Och,
murtliur, Mat ; suro an' ye hale the divil iu
Hie sack."
"Hate the ould hutheo, then ; yez 'ill niver
Have a neither chance. Hula the horns eft
'im ; lather 'im like blazes, me durlint I"
"Augb!" says Hiddy, "I'm fointiu' wid do
power of 'im. Cast 'im off yez Mut !"
"Howly St. Fathrick," says Mat, throwing
dowu the sack, "Biddy, the baste is a pole
Cut 1 Love the bouse, or yez'll be kilt iniire
ly. Muither and turf, how the baylhen
smills. Och. Hiddy Malooey, a purty kittle
o' fish yez made of it, to be sure, to be mis
tukiu' that little divil lor a harumlces cat."
"Mat, for the love o' God, if yez convani
ent to the door, bo uflher openiu', for I'm
naiely choked wid un. Och, Hiddy Maloney,
bud luck to yez for laviu' ould Irelund, to be
murtbered in this way. Howly Marv, per
teel me I Mut, I'm clane kilt iutirely take
me out o' this."
Mul throw her out of doors, and then broke
for tbe pump like a quarter horse, closely
followed by Hiddy.
"Shure, thut little villain bales tbe divil
iutirely ; lie's ruined me bouse, au' pal me
out o' consate wid mepelf for a mouth to
come. Och, the deseavin' vaguboiie, bud
luck to bim,' and Mat plunged hid head into
the horbo trough up to his shoulders.
"Get out o' that, Mat, I'm ueaily blind,"
and Hiddy went under the water. Och, the
uiutluriu' baste," s:i)S Biddy, sputtering the
water out of her mouth, "me best petticoat
is spilt entirely. Mul Malouey, divil a trap
will 1 iver help yez to sit for a cut miuiu."
"Don't Ihrouhle yerself, Mistress Maloney,
ye've pluyed llieiiivi) cs it is. Nivir fear me
axiu" a lap'orlb o' jer assistance. U'b nnlh'
ral fool ye are, to bo takiu' a baste uv a pole
cat for a bouse cat."
Mai and Biddy went cautiously back to the
cabin' from which the, offensive quadruped
had taken his departure. Things were turn
ed out of doors, Biddy's petticoat buried, the
bed, which forluuutcly escuped, moved In a
near neighbors, the Hove moved outside, and
for a week they kept house out 1 1 doors, by
which time, by liiut of Laid scrubbing, wash
ing, aud uiriu', the Loiish wu rendered once
mote babitublo, but ueither .Mul nor l iddy
Las forgoltou the "strange cut.."
No Timk to IIksitati: A i-l.-rymin f
ose of our hasten states, w'un d.iripg his
life time was is much disliucu shed f, r his
eccentricity as for bis talents uud for lh siu-
w.-iiijr uuu o-uvoi oi uis pieiy, uiiiej, our
I hauksgiving duy, witu Ibe senior deacon cf
his ohurcb, I ha deacon being uu old lush
ioued man, was iu the habit of uskiuir bless,
ings of. most wearisome length. On tbis
occasion be was particularly prolix, and final,
ly was forced to pause. In gain a new supply
of breath and words. The instant he stopped
th. pastor sat dowu and commenced rattling
bit kuife and fork. The worlhy deacon, very
much disconcerted by the conduct nf his rev
erend guest, opened oue eye, and. Linking
down to bim, exc a med, "Doctor! Doctor I
I'm not through yet ; 1 only hesitated."
,' Hesitated !" replied the Dortor;"it is no
time to hesitate wben turkey's cooling 1"
Sisui'LiR. It it generally observed that
pereooi of about forty years, especially young
ladies of tbat age, are very forgetful of those
with whom tbey were acquainted io child,
bood. 1'bii remarkable diuiuesi of memory
bai beau appropriately styled: "The data
nest of tbe middle ages."
A celebrated cook wbo died receutly bai
had bit epitapb written by louie cockney,
"Peace to bis buibei."
Thr JTanetr and thk Dutchman' Don.
Abuer was a quiet, peaceable sort ol a Yan
kee, wbo lived on tbe lame farm oo which hi
father bad lived before bim, and wta generally
considered a pretty cute sort of a fellow
alwuys ready with a trick, whenever it was
ol the least ntility ; yet wben he did play any
of bis tricks, 'twas done io such aa iuoocent
manner, Ihut his victim could do uo better
than take it all in good purt.
Now, it happened that one of Abner'l
neigbbgrs sold a farm to a tolerubly grfen
specimen of a Dutchman one of the real
unintelligent, stiipid sort.
Von Vlnmp .Schlopsb had a dog. as Dutch
men often have, who was lets unintelligent
thao his master, and wbo hnd, since leaving
his, "fuderlunt," been me sufficiently civilizd
not only to appropriate tbe soil common stock,
but had progresed in the good work, ns to
obtain his dinners frcm the varii.us tbeep
folds on the same principle.
When Abuer discovered propensity ia tbe
canine department of the Du'ctiiii.in's laniily
be ca led over to his new neighbor's to entor
cnmplaiot, which mission he accomplished in
Hie most tuiturul manner in Ibe world.
"Wu!l, Vou, jour dog's been killiug my
sheep."
"Ya dut isb bad ha is von gooU tog
yn dat isb very bad."
".Sartuin it's bad and you'll have to stop
him."
"Ya dat w alias goot but lch weibt
nicbt."
Whai'i tliat you say be was uicked ? Wall
now, look here old fellow, r.ick.n s no use
crop biui cut the tail close off' chock up to
Ihe trunk that'll cure him."
"Vat ish dat ?' exclaimed the Dutchman
while a fuiut ray cf intelligence crept over bin
features.
"Yu, dat ish gool dat cure vou sheep
shteul, eh ?"
"Sartaiu it will he'll never touch sheep
meat again iu this world.
"Den, come mit me be von inity goot teg
ull do way from Yat many ; lch oo tuke von
live tollar but come mit me, aud bold his
tail. Ich chop bim off."
''Siirtaiu, I'll hold his tail if you waul to,
but you must cut it up clcse."
"Ya, dat Uh right, ich make bim von
goot tog.
Hero, Blitsen, come right here, you von
shoep ehleel rashkul Ich chop your tail iu
vou two pieces."
Tbe dog obeyed the summons, and the
inaner tied bis feel fore and aft, for fear of
accident and placing tbe tail iu the Yankee's
baud requested hi in to lay it across ft large
block of wood."
"Chock up," said Abner, ts be drew tbe
butt of tbe tail over the log.
Ya, dal isb right. Now, you tief sheep t
h ants you j utter luck," and be raised tho
axe.
It descended, BDd as it did so Abner, with
characterestic presence of mind, brought
Blitzen's neck over the log, aod tbe bead
rolled over on tho other side.
"Wall, 1 6Wuw,"said Abner witb apparent
astonishment, as be dropped the headless
trunk of tbe dog, "that was a little too close."
"Mine Soul!" exclaimed the Dutchman,
you sbust cut bim off de wrong eud."
S i i ii i Mwy i,i i Mww
Jjavmcrs' gcpaiiinnit
Spreading Manuro.
In au aiticlo on this subject, the editor of
tbe American Fanner's Magazine remarks!
As ibe time for top-dressing mow lands ia
at band, we have a woid to say ou tbe sub
ject. As to tbe question of fall or spring,
we do uot believe anybody can answer it for
all cases. Il the manure is old and well com
posted with much or decayed vegetable mut
ter ; if Ihe ground is such that there is no
danger of bard wushiug from it ; aod, further
if you will work tbe soauure down finely aud
evenly to the surfuce, we bave uo objection
to full top-dressing. Jt bus its advantage.
The effect ou the first year's crop will proba
bly be greater and the peru.uneiit effect may
not be less.
For spring top-dressing we prefer tbe fol
lowing mode, having often practised it, aud
fouud ihe little extra labor employed well
paid, as we believe. Il is to carry out the
muuure (sluble or barn yard) eurly, to lay it
;o somewhat larger heaps than would be
most easily spread, say six or sovuu to the
largo load ; then to carry uud tbiow over
each heap a few sbovelsful of well cured muck
or, in want of this, of uny rich soil ; ucd to
let it lie iu tbis condition till a good time for
spreading it. The time is wheu a lung, cold
northwester is brewiug. When the indica
tions of such u storm are strong, we would
Bpreod tho manure, but not before. Let it
be spread evenly and worked iu among tbe
grass roots. A bush harrow inav iu soma
cases be Uicd to advantage, and we would
commend its Uce, providing you will go after
it wilh a muny-tined furk or a rake, uud reg
ulate the inequalities w hich the barrow may
have left, orawiug tbe uiunuro from places
thul have received too much to tlLers lliut
bavu leceived Lone.
The muck or soil with which the heaps ere
covered mil render the niauuie more crum
bly, will cnablo'yoa to spread it more evenly
aud will belp to reiuiu the ammonia, if your
precalculations of the weather should fail, and
you should bave suuuy instead or rainy wea
ther alter epfcadiug.
Ci.MK.NT ior Woisdeo Tbkks. Take off
air-slacked lime, three parts iiusecd oil, three
p i t , common cow.du g, three parts, black
pitch, two purls. Mix ihe first ILree ingredi
i uis thoroughly together wilh a spatulu, aud
add the pilch alter II had beeu fluidified aud
healed over a good Mie. If the ceuieut is too
thick to be upplitd with a brush, it may be
thinned to the requisitd consistency by adding
more pitch, or a kuUiCieucy ot Uusecu on uuu
spirits of luipeutiue, iu iual pel lions. This
cement beius asliui.g resemblance to the
celebrated Forsyth t fcmcif," bul is le.-l
(oslly uuj equuily s ellicieul when iippl.td
to wounds und bruites iu every kiud of trues.
Wheu Urge limbs ate removed, a coating of
this applied to the stumps, will preveut rot
uuj promote the be I u of ihe wouud. De
cay iu llie trunks of upple and other trees,
may be speedily and effectually arrested, by
cutting uway tbe diseased purl, and filling iu
the cavity with tbil cement, propel ly Ibickeu
ed for tbe purpose of an uddiliuuul quantity
nf the fiisl four ingredieuts 10 their proper
relative pioporlioui.-6'criuii(0iri Ttlajruph.
Bcoi in Pkau The best remedy for bogl
in peat ii to pour just euflitieut boiling water
over the pen to cover the so aud no more,
(for a larger quantity would destroy both peat
and bugi.) and let tbeui icald for one miuutej
bis crop from tbat season's yield will be free
from tbe bug. have tried it repeitedlv
and found it effectual. Tbe baa- dovi not in
jure tbe germinating power! of tbe pea, bat
renaeri Uvu nuDi lo us at rood wucl dried,
uuleis lor aniens!.. So sivi Luoi lslab
farmer.