THE
JEFFERRONTAN
s
HlcDotctr ta politic, literature, Agriculture, Science, Jttoralitg, ani eueral intelligence.
VOL. 24.
STEGUDSBURG, MONROE COUNTY, PA JUNE 1, 1865,
NO.lii
Published by Theodore Schoclu
TCRAtsS Two dollars a. year in advance and if no
paid before the end of the yeaj, two dollars and filfy
'ctsvill'ie charged.
, No. paper discontinued until all arreaiagcs are paid,
-except at the option of the Editor.
r3 Advertisements of one square of (eight lines) or
Jess, one or three insertions $1 50. Each additional
tnscrtion, 50 cents. Longer ones in proportion.
JOB PRBiWIWG,
OF ALL KINDS.
Bioctited in the highest ttyle of the Arl.andonthe
iiiosi rcasorriulc terms.
EDWARD'S TEMPTATION.
BY IIOllATIC ALGER. JR.
It was six o'clock in the afternoon.
At this time the great wholesale ware
house of Messrs. Hubbard & Son was
wont to close, unless the pressure of bus
iness compelled the partners to keep open
until later.
The duty of closing usually devolved
upon Edward Jones, a boy of fourteeu,
who had lately been engaged to perform
a few slight duties for which he received
the sum of fifty dollars aunually. He
was the "boy," but if he behaved himself
so as to win the approbation of his em
ployers his chance of promotion was good.
Yet there were sonic things thatrcn-
dercu ttijs small salary a hard trial to
him circumstances with which his em
ployers were unacquainted. His mother
was 3 widow. The sudden death of Mr.
Jones had thrown the entire family upon
their own resources, and these were in
deed but slender.
There was an elder sister who assisted
her mother to sew, and this, with Ed
ward's salary, constituted the entire in
come of the family. Yet by means of un
tiring industry, they had continued thus
far to live, using strict economy, of course.
Yet they had wanted none of the abso
lute uccessaries of life.
But Mary Jones Edward's sister
gieWsiek. She had taken a severe cold
wn;cn terminated m lever, i ms not on
ly cut off the income arising from her
own labor, bualso preventing her moth
er from accomplishing as much as she
would otherwise have been able to do.
On the morning of the Iay ou which
our story commences, Mary had express
ed a longing for an orange. In her fever
it would have been most grateful to her.
It is hard indeed, when wc are
obliged
to ucjv ti!'3C wc k're that which
u vuu
Do a refreshment and benefit, to them.
Mrs. Jones felt this, and so did Ed
ward.
"I ouly wish I could buy you one, Ma
ry," said Edward, just as he set out for
the store.
"-Next year I shall receive a
larger salary,
and then we shan t have to
"Never mind, Edward," said Mary,
smiling faintly. "I ought not to have
asked for it knowing how hard you and
mother find it to get along without me."
"Don't trouble yourself about that,
Mary," said Mrs. Jones, soothingly,
though her heart sank within her at the
thought of her empty larder. '-Only get
well, and we shall get ou well enough af
terwards." It was with the memory of this scene
that Edward went to the store iu the
morning.
All around him were boxes of rich
goods representing thousands of dollars
in mancy.
"Oh," thought he. "if I only had the
value of one of these boxes how much
good it would do poor Mary," and Ed
ward siirhei.
The long day wore away at last, and
Edward was about to close the warehouse.
But as he passed the desk of his em
ployer his attention was drawn to a bit of
paper lying on the floor beneath.
lie picked it up, and to his great joy
found it to be a ten dollar bill.
The first thought that flashed 'upon
him was. "How much good this will do
Mary. I can buy her the oranges she
wants, and she shall have some every day.
And perhaps she would like a chicken.
But a moment later his countenance
fell.
"It isn't mine," he sighed. "It must
he Mr. Hubbard's. ' This is his desk and
he must have dropped it.
"Still," urged the tempter, "he will
never know it; and after all what are ten
dollars to him ? He is worth a hundred
thousand."
Still Edward was not satisfied. Wheth
er Mr. Hubbard could snare it or not
was not the ouestion. It was rightfully
He determined to go to Mr
Hubbard's
uelore h
went home. The sight or his
sister
might perhaps weaken his resolu
tion, and this must never be. He must
preserve his integrity at all hazards.
He knew where Mr. Hubbard lived.
It wns n ljrrn finf looking hoUSC On a
o rj
fashionable street. He had passed it sev
eral times and woudered whether a' man
snist not feel happy who was able to live
ia such style.
Without any unneoessary delay, there
fore, he went to the house, ascended the
fctcps and rang the bell.
A man servant came to the door.
"Well?" he. said.
"Is Mr. Hubbard at home?"
"Yes, but he has only just come in,
and I don't think he can see you," was
ihc rather supercilious reply.
"I am in his employ," said Edward,
"and I have just come from the store.
I think 'He will sec mo if you mention
this to him?7
7T,,, . ,uc Su Ly . v I of mother and daughter as they heard ms ; thc rcafc Mississippi to navigation, and
-Id go right to his house , and give it, mrricd storyi and Mrs. Jones thanked I drove flic enemy from the larger part of
to him this very night, said Edward. , 0(J(1 for be8towinS upon her son whose j tho State of Mississippi.
. "vtii - "-uw vw r good principles UUU muuui mem cmo
it," " t i:r
"Very well, you can come in."
Edward was left standing in the hall,
while Mr. Hubbard was sought by the
servant
"Well?" he asked
anything happened ?"
inquiringly, "has
"No sir," said Edward, "but I picked
up this bill near your desk, and supposed
you dropped it. I thought I had better
bring it here directly."
"You have done well," said Mr. Hub
bard, "and I will remember it. Honesty
is a very valuable quality in a boy just
commencing a business career. Hereaf
ter I shall have perfect confidence in vour
honesty."
Edward was gratified by his assurance,
yet, as the door closed behind him, and
he walked out into the street, the thought
of his sick sister at home again intruded
upon him, and he thought regretfully
how much good could have been done
with ten dollars. Nut that he had re
gretted that he had been honest. There
was a satisfaction in doing right.
Airs. Jones brought some toast-to her
daughter's bedside, but Mary motioned
it away.
"I thank you for taking the trouble to
make it, mother," said she, "but I don't
think I can nossiblv eat it."
"Is there anything that you can relish?
Alary V '
"No," said she, hesitatingly, nothing
that we can get."
Mrs. Jones sighed, a sigh which Ed
ward echoed.
It was with a heavy heart that Edward
started for the warehouse next morning.
He had never felt the craving for wealth
which now took possession of him.
He set about his duties as usual. A
bout two hours after he had arrived at
the warehouse- Mr. Hubbard entered.
He did not at first appear to notice Ed
ward, but in about half an hour summon
ed him to the office, which was partitioned
on Irom the remainder of the spacious
rooms in which goods were stored.
He smiled pleasantly as Edwerd en
tered his presence.
"Tell me frankly," he said, "did you
not feel an impulse to keen the bill which
you found last night ?"
" I hope you will not be offended with
me, Mr. Hubbard," said Edward, "if I
say that I did."
"TeU me all about it," said Mr. Hub
bard, with interest. "What was it that
withheld you. I should never have
known it."
"I knew that," said Edward.
"Theu what withheld you from taking
it?"
"First, I will tell you what tempted
me," said Edward. "My mother and sis
ter are obliged to depend upon sewing for
a living, aud we live but poorly at the best.
But a fortnight since Mary became eick,
and since then we have had a hard time.
Mary's appetite is poor, and does uot rel
ish food, but we are able to get her noth
ing better. When I picked Up that bill
I could not help thinking how much I
might buy with it for her."
"And yet you did not take it ?"
"Mo, sir, it would have been wrong,
and I could not have looked you in the
face after it."
Edward spoke in a tone of modest con
fidence. Mr. Hubbard went to the desk aud
wrote a check.
"How much do I pay you now ?" he
asked.
'Fifty dollars a year." said Edward.
"Henceforth your duties will be in
creased, and I will pay you two huudrcd.
Will flmr. nlpnvfi vnn
"Two hundred dollars a year!" exclaim
ed Edward, his eyes sparkling with de
light. "Yes, and at the end of the year
that will be increased, if, as I have no
doubt, you continue to merit my confi
dence." "Oh, sir, how can I thank you ?" said
Edward, full of gratitude.
"By preserving your integrity. As I
presume you are in present need of mon
ey, I will pay you one quarter in advance.
Here is a check for fifty dollars which
t 1 it I 1 4 1
; you can get casnea at me oauK. aou,
j by the way, you may have the rest of the
day to yourself."
j Edward flew to the bank, and: with his
suddeu riches hastened to the market
i where he purchased a supply of provis
! ions such as he knew would be welcome
at home, aud then made haste home to
announce his good fortune.
A weight seemed to tali off the hearts
And Mr, Uubbara siept none cue worse
that night that at a slight pecuniary
rifice he had done a kind action con firm -
cd a boy in his integrity, and gladdened
i 1 T I" . 1 It f hA rn MTfWfL TO ffi
employers as considerate as he,
i
mmu .
would be fewer dishonest clerks.
tV clergyman was lately depicting before
a deeply interested audience, the alarm iug tractal)le mountains, and partly to the ! Schmidt for short. He left a wife who
increase ofintcmpcrancc.whcu he astonish-iwanfc 0f stiH iu the pursuit exhibited by j was rather good-looking, quite industri
ed his hearers by exclaiming : "A young ' nn fwn nf i,:fi chnrdinatos. But oflous. verv frugal, and childless. Time
woman in my ncigiinornooa aieu very
suddenly in a last Sabbath, while I was
r ' . ,
preaching thc gospel in a state of beastly
intoxication !" Moral ; mind your stops,
and how you construct you sentences.
iTroni Alabama.
Alabama has beeu divided into three
internal revenue districts, but no appoint
ments of assessors or collectors haye yet
. bocii niada:
xhe Character Of Gen. Grant.
It has doubtless occurred to many of
our readers as a singular and what some
would call a Providential occurrence, that
ln tins great war of the people against
an aristocracy conspicuously boastful of
Its blood' birth and wntlfi hrnnrlinor f.hn
popular side has been conducted to a sue-
vVwwk vv
cesstui issue by leaders who themselves
Deiong to what Mr. .Lincoln called the
"plain people," and what Englishmen
writing about us ignorantly call the "peas
ant class." We have no peasant class in
the free States; 'but Mr. Lincoln and
General Grant are both the sons of "plain
people ;" both arose foom humble circum
stances ; both, in their youth at least, la
bored with their hands for bread, and
neither had any of those advantages of
birth, or powerful family influence, or
Kreui, estate, wmcn in tne ooutn, as m
Europe, served men as a lever for their
personal aggrandizement.
General Grant, who entered the war
as a colonel of an Illinois regiment, has
shown, in every position which he has
held, genuine greatness of character, as
well us extraordinary military genius.
He became colonel of a regiment which
was about ta disband because the men
could uot agree with their officers : but
in less than a month he had made this
regiment the best in point of disci
pline aud character which the State
of Illinois has sent out. His nnnh-
trusivc but marked ability caused his
promotion to the grade of brigadier-gen
eral ; and after the battle of Belmont,
which served its purpose iu preventing
the reinforcement of Price in Southern
Missouri by troops from Columbus, he
conceived the first of those brilliant cam
paigns of which military historians will
write with delight.
The rebels held Columbus on the Mis
sissippi, aud .bowling Green, m Central
Kentucky, and from these points threa
tened at once St. Louis and Cincinnati.
Grant quietly aud secretly collected a
strong force near Stnithiand,"and suddenly
pounced down first upon Fort Henry and
then upon Fort Donclson. In these two
places he captured a rebel army, with all
its artillery aud, material but this was
the least of the fruits of his well-considered
strategy, for the capture of Fort
Douelson produced the precipitate evacua
tion of Kentucky and half of Tennessee
by the enemy, who did not stop until he
reached Corinth, retreating a distance
of over three hundred miles without an
other battle.
Next came the great battle of Shiloh.
In that Sherman was Grant's chief Lieu
tenant, aud the two men tested each
other's qualities in the most extreme trial
to which cither had been exposed. The
battle was one of the "turning points" of
the war. It, has been told us that
Grant came into headquarters tent on the
evening of the first day's battle, when to
any but the most heroic spirits fortune
seemed to have deserted us, and said
quietly, "Well, gentlemen, it was tough
work to-day, but we'll beat them to-morrow"
Displaced by B.uel, Grant uttered no
word of complaint ; no newspaper corres
pondent even complained for him, but he
went quietly on in his appointed place.
We may suppose that the slow, timid and
unmilitary policy which marked the long
siege of Coriuth must often have chafed
his spirit, yet one of his merits is to sub
mit to his superiors, cheerfully doing his
own work without stopping to question
or rectify the work of others ; and even
while iguorance or malice traduced his
character and belitted his services, giving
his best ability to the furtherauce of the
plans of the hour. Fortunately wo had
in the War Department a man of insight
and decisiveness, who very soon saw the
value of Grant, and put it to use. The
long and almost impracticable campaign
against Yicksburg was submitted to his
direction, and led to as brilliant a series
of operations as the greatest General of
modern days ever conceived or executed.
Yicksburg was .the second of Graut's
fruitful victories. A rebel army, with
all its arms and materials, surrendered to
him ; but this material gain was the least
of the fruits of his success, for, as the
capture of Fort Dcnelson expelled the re
bel forces, without another blow, from all
Kentucky and the greater part of Ten
nessee, from a region of country nearly
as great as the Island of Great Britain,
and a third
greater
than Eugland alone,
of Yicksburg rc-opencd.
Chattanooga came next. "Hold fast ,
An rrirrn 11 n nii'iffiiinnfrn iP irnn srnrijn "
I i . . i
so uiu cauiuru
h(j tel hed to General Thomas, whose
sac-jsufferilf g army Bragg looked down from
' fc . htfi it as hia certain proy
. . . batte . d w d fch CUn
-J
and relieved
Chattanooga, and
i"ku
T) . r T.,t
ii nivi' ii iiiii, fii i'JiItmj
Tennessee into
Georgia. He did not this time capture
tun Pm-pna nf i.lm nnnmv. owm?' mrtlv to
1 , ,i:fim,H .,r,irrt nP rmrsuit and the in-
lliJlr V- wiiw w-
the jjatties fought on Lookout Mountain
' i "Rulfrn liicforv records no
i paranell for sublimity of daring and pic- (
Jurcsqucness of effect, which were the- j
division of the Confederacy into two parts,
were lnestimaoie in nieir jmpuimuu.
At last Grant was drawn eastward, to
command all the armies of the nation.
Wc haye uot forgot thc misgivings with
which "the public heard of this transfer
to a more comprehensive field' of duty,'
. II " it. - I.. :
and more exacting trials. Would he
I prove adequate to the enormous labor ?
tie not be spoiled by promotion, or ruined
as so many before have been, by the dif-
uculties or operations in Virginia ! Above
, all, would he not be sacrificed by the
bickerings of tliPi Pnfnmrifi rrfmnrnlfi ?
Such were the questions asked on every
I . 1 www.
j hand. The Lieutenant-General, howev
er, heeded them not, and went on his
way as taciturn, as silent, as self-concen
trated, as tcnacions and as indomitable
as the brigadier and major-general had
been. He made no speeches on his way
to the east ; he did not address the troops
lying in winter quarters at Culpepper ;
but he took hold of his work at ouce and
by the handle.
Under his eyes the campaign which
began last May has been uninterruptedly
successtul. His hrst blow at Lee, m
those prodigious and terrible battles of
the Wilderness, so cripled the principal
army of the rebels that it could do noth
ing for eleven months afterwards butlie in
strong works, and maintain the defensive.
By this masterly stroke Sherman and
Thomas were furnished with the oppor
tunity of action which they well knew
how to improve. All the while the dear
old Army of the Potomac, which had
been so often battered and broken, but
never overcome, was assigned to the dis
agreeable and seemingly inglorious func
tion of holding Lee still before Peters
burg; but the General-in-Chief shared
their burden, aud left to his distant lieu
tenants the more promising and satisfac
tory task of active movement and battle.
Sherman and Sheridan and Thomas were
allowed to reap a very harvest of laurels.
But the. moment at length came for
which Grant had waited so many weary
months, enduring the taunts of the whole
semi-rebel press at home and abroad,
which denounced him as Butcher Grant,
and demonstrated triumphantly that his
game was blocked, and that. he was forc
ed to lie idle by the superior prowess and
strategy of Lee. He sent forth on the
2Gth of March the potent command to
move. One mighty week of battle com
pelled the surrender of a third army of
the rebels, and with it the fall of Rich
mond, the capitol of the confederacy, the
dispersion of the government, and the
termination of the struggle as an organiz
ed and vital contest.
JY. Y. Evening Post.
Now and Then.
The Ncio Yor7c Atlas is a journal griev
ously addicted to awkward reminiscences.
One of its latest has the following :
On the 16th of November last more
than a week after Mr. Lincoln's re-elec
tion, and when there was no excuse for
such an outbreak the Tammany Hall
Committee held a meeting over which
Wm. M. Tweed presided, and, on motion
of George H. Purser,
licsoIvedjThatvce condemn and denounce
the administration of Abraham Lincoln
as imbecile, extravagant aud corrupt, and
believe that a persistence in its injudicious
and partisan conduct of the war, and its
notorious faithlessness to thc letter and
spirit of the Constitution and laws, will
contribute tp ombittcr and prolong the
existing struggle, increase the sacrifice of
human life, and the ruinous burden of
the public debt, justly invoke suspicion
in the North, and repel rather than in
vite returning loyalty on the part of the
rebellious States of the South."
On thc 15th day of April, 1865' -not
quite five months afterward that same
Democratic General Committee held an
other meeting, and this time,
"Resolved, That believing Abraham
Lincoln, as a ruler, to have been governed
by patriotic motives, honesty of purpose,
and an elevated appreciation of the grave
and responsible duties imposed upon him
in the greatest crisis of our country's his
tory commanding in so great a degree
tho confidence of the loyal people of the
nation and exhibiting in the recent
events which had terminated in the down
fall of the rebellion, a wise forebcaring
and magnanimous statesmanship, tho ex
ercies of which gave such hopeful pro
mise of a speedy and perfect restoration
of thc national Uniou in thc spirit and
on the principles upon which it was
founded, wc regard his sad end and un
timely decease a great misfortune to tho
whole country."
There's progress ! If neither of those
resolves means much, it . is certain that the
latter, so far as it means anything, is far
tho truer. Whoever shall hereafter read
that tho Democratic General Commit
tee gravely resolves thus or so" Should
wait five mouths or so to ascertain how
much of it is earnest aud how much
merely "Buncombe." Tribune.
An Enoch Arden of the Day.
An Iowa paper has the following story,
which recalls the incidents of Tennyson's
poem : "Thirty months ago, a German,
living on White street, in Dubuqo. Iowa,
! volunteered with the 5Jst Iowa luiantrv.
and went to the war. We shall call him
- i mj J-
rolled on, and Schmidt, says the Dubuque
Times, went with his regiment to Vicks
burg. There he was shot one day, and
was'left for dead on the field. The sad
intelligence was sent to his wife by his
captain, and she immediately obtained
the assistance of a lawyer, and secured
his back pav aud a widow's pension; Sho
drew the latter regularly, aud, with what
she earned, managed to live comlortably.
In a few mouths- she' attracted the- atton-
tion of one Schones a miller by oc
cupation. Jlc wooed and won, and for
him she gave up the pension. They were
married last summer. The course of true
love ran smooth witlr them until last er applications, several ladies called upon
baturday morning, when, just after they j the Provost Marshal of the Western Dig
had finished breakfast, Mr. Schmidt, thejtrict and unfolded a horrible story of suft
first husband opened the door and walked jfcring and woe. The gallant General
in!
"Here was a fix !
Mrs. what would
7 zu'.niA .
her name be in such
r i ouiitRvu , ii jjiic au uugageu some remarK was maae
Mr. Schones turned pale and trembled, about the termination of war. Wherff
for Schmidt looked vengeance after he nnnn onfinPt.rtn i:nrnr;nn nnnlUnio
Had suryeyed the scene a moment and tn
ken all- its meaning m. ' After several
minutes of silence, Schones revived, and you kill all the men, and then, we wo--boldly
asked, "What is to be
Si- ' -
chmidt sat down and told his story He
was wounded, not severely, near Vicks -
burg, and taken prisoner, and the rebels gui nary oration, delivered - withall the
oarried him -away with them. From time' venom of a southortf beggar, quite ap
t6 time he had been in Southern prisons ! palled the General, who auietlv tnro n
until three weeks since when he was ex-
changed. He came to Dubuaue as soon
as he could, and hastened to his home.
He received no intimation of- his wife's
marriage until he entered the house that
morning, iis ne concluded his storv. his
eenngs overcame him; and he wept, and
she wept also. But it all ended in the
second husband's refusal to give the wife
up. She, we are informed, refused to
express a prelerence, and said the two
men might settle the matter between
hemsel.vcs. For four days both men
kept .very close to the house, and had
many ardent discussions over the difficul-
Lut the matter ended on Wednes
day last. " The returned husband offered
Schones twentv-five dollars to evacuate
the premises aud leave him in possession
of 'Annie.' Schones accepted the offer,
pocketed the money, and left. Schmidt
is now with his wife."
The Emperor and the Actor.
The following anecdote is new, and ex
hibits the late Emperor of llussla in a
new character, as well as records one of
the most happy escapes from an awkward
position that wit and presence of mind
might afford. Some years ago there was
a very celebrated comic actor at St. Pe
tersburg named Martinoff. He had most
extraordinary powers of imitation, and
was pq great a favorite with the public as
sometimes to venture interpolations of his
own, instead of following the advice of
Hamlet to the players, to "speak no more
than is set down to them " The empe
ror at the same time had a high cham
berlain, or personage filling a similar of
fice, named Poloffsky. Whether for fun
or malice, Martinoff, while performing,
contrived to let fly some puns against this
great man, which were warmly received
by the audience. The consequence was,
as soon as the play was over, the actor
found himself in the custody of a guard
of soldiers, who took him to prison, where
he was iold he was to bo confined for a
j fortnight. Not contented with- this, Po
loffsky either told the emperor himself,
or contrived that it should come to his
ears, that the player had actually had
the presumption to indulge in imitations
of His Imperial Majesty.
On his' liberation, Martinoff went to
court to pay his respects as usual, and
the emperor told him of this accusation,
which he denied. "Well," said the em
peror, "if you never did so, let me have
an intimation of myself now. We know
you can do' so if you choose." This was
an awkward and dangerous position' for
the poor actor, who felt he should get in
to trouble for cither falling short of or o
verdoing the character. Still the auto
crat was determined ; there was no escape.
Suddenly a bright thought struck the'
player and drawing himself up, he as
sumed the exact bearing and manner of
thc emncror. and in a voice so like that
it made every one present start, said
Poloffsky, give Martinoff (himself) a
thousand silver roubles. "Stop," said
the emperor, "I have heard quite enough.
The imitation is admirable, but the enter
tainment promises to be too expensive.
Give him the roubles, lolousky; and now
mind, sir, let this be thc last time you ev
er dare to mimic me here or elsewhere." It
is, of course, 'unnecessary to say Martinoff
was too glad to pocket the money and es
cape so well.
A Sheriff Badly Sold.
The following incident took place in
thc court of B county, Ohio, Judge
McF presiding :
A new Sheriff had just been elected,
and the Judge wishingto have everything
done in order, called thc newly elected
official into his room to instruct him in
his dnt.ips. and finding said otl'ciaf deci-
dedly verdant as to the proper manner of
opening court, wrote out the entire proc-
lamatiou aim gave nun an uic neuu&aiuy
instructions in relation thereto. Now it
so happened that F , of P Coun
ty, a iun-lovmg attorney, was sitting by
at th'e time, aud seeing a chance for fun
ahead, prepared another proclamation, and
by a little legerdemain succeeded in sub-
stituting it in the shonu s nat lor the onoj
friven him bv the Judge. Eleven o'clock
. i m i n . v
cnnie and so did the Order from Judge
McF : Sheriff, opeu court.
Draw -
ing his instructions deliberately from his
liat he commencad in a steutoriau voice
"Hcaryo! hear ye! hear ye I, The lion
orable District Court of the County of B
is wound up and all ready to grind. AIL
hnvincr rrriuts mnv nitoh in .and their!
grists shall be ground !" Thc laugh that
caiiic in cau only he appreciated by Wcs-
tofumon:
w&Sm
Secesh Ghosts Foreshadowed.
When General Sherman's army occupi
ed Savannah, the citizens nWriPrl itarvai
' tion and asked to be fed.
Amongest oth-
B imnressed with the Lilrv tidnfaA'
i himself to write the order for supplies:
wi,:i i i- "
- 1 nnnnrl nnnn Min (I
i "This war won't ha tormht nf;i
I " " 11... J VU) CUV. u JUU JV111 ail JL
us it won't be ended then, fnr wo'll nnmo;
lback ns trhnat tn lidnnUnn" fi,;a
the order he was writtinc. savinir :
"If such be the case, I thinkyou might
as well die of starvation, as then vour
! ghosts mav be too weak to come back andr
haunt us." And he coolly but politely
i bowed the ladv mendicants into tho
street.
A French Story.
An amusing story is told of a
vonnrr
Parisian artist, who lately painted a por-!
trait of a duchess, with which her friends
were not satisfied, declaring that it .was
totally unlike her. The painter, how-
ever, was convinced that he had succeed
i -c
ed admirably, and proposed that the ques-'
tion or resemblance or no resemblance
should be left to a little dog belonging to'
the duchess, which was agreed to. Ae
cordingly the picture was sent to the ho
tel of the lady the next day, and a large'
party assembled to witness the test. The
dog was called in ; and no sooner did ho
see the portrait than he sprang upon it,'
licked it all over and showed every de
monstration of the greatest joy. The'
triumph of the painter was complete ; and.
all present insisted that the picture had
been retouthed during the night; which:
was actually so, the artist having rubbed
it over with a thin coating of lard ! The:
dogs's nose was sharper than the critics"
eyes.
A Combination.
Somcr thirty years ago, in Washington
county, N. Yv before ready made shoes'
came in vogue, a venerable shoemaker,'
old Phoenix, was in the habit of going',
from house to house, and there making
up boots and shoes for the families under'
his jurisdiction. Among thc rest of his
customers, he visited the family of one"
Mr. Parish, and shod" old and young.
One of the boys was endowed with a big
pair of stogy boots, and on the succeed.
ing Sabbath went to church much more
occupied with the boots than the sermon
At' thc noon intermission, when good old'
Dr. Proudfit came around, as was his cus
tom, to catechise thc youngsters, the"
boy's thoughts still ran downward. The
old doctor coming up to the boy, in hi3
turn, inqured of him : "John, who made
you ?" "Daddy found the leather, and'
Old Phoenix did the work ?" was tho
natural but unexpected reply.
- m ii
A Frightful Fashion.
An observant correspondent of the5
Chambershurg Repository writing from'
the city of New York, thus describes one
of the prevailing fashions in that town
"One sees on the street some queer
styles of hair dressing, among which tho.
ugliest is the waterfall. It is a matter of
surprise to the uninitiated how thc wo
men can-raise so much hair; but if those
same innocents would only notice the
store windows, they would see enormous
rolls of horse hair, etc., for the purpose
of filling out the thin hair of the fair sex;
and waterfalls ready made, to bo pinned'
on thc occiput. What a set of humbugs'
we arc ! A favorite style of wearing tho'
hair can readily be imitated by our bright
cheeked country girls thus : Comb out
their hair carefully, then tangle it all"
they know how; rub it full of burrs, and.
sleep in it without a cap for a fortnight.
This will be a sufficiently close imitation
to pass on Broadway. If it should not;
however, be quite the thing, an attempt
to got through a very large rose bush1,'
head foremost, would mako the similitude4
perfect."
Apt Eeply.
A veteratf relates thc following
I
had happened that a mule driver wan
eugaged in leading an unruly mule for a
short distance, which job proved as much
! as he could do, and gave full employment
j for both of his hands. As ho was thus;
engaged, a newly appointed brigadier
general rode by near him, in all the conse
quential radianoy of his starlight, when5
the mule driver hailed him as folows :
"I say, I wish you would send a couplo
of men down here to help mo manage thi3
ere mule."
The baigadier, indignant at being so
familiarly addressed, sternly replied
"Do y'ou know what I am sir ?"
I I Ji .1 1 . . . n
-acs, was tuo rcpiy -jou arc uen.
I believe."
"Then why do you not
saluto rno.-be
; fore addressing mo I lmquired the bng-
adier.
''I will," responded thc M. D., I
you
will get off and hold thc mule."
Thc brigadier retired in good order."
"The last ditch" ill which
Jeff. J)a3
proposed to make hia fiual stau'd" , haa
been discovered. It was" his' wilejset
Ui'coat. '