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TMW Hl'HAOTON TRIBUNE-THURSDAY, JANUARY 2, 1902.
"V-""
0e Cfanfcm CtnGtme
is.tMMIliK.mllft r.xctpl SutnUjV tit Tlie Ttlji.
ob I'ublUhlnir Company, it fifty ConU Montj.
f.lv.V c. iitcilAitn, editor.
O. P. IIY.XUIU:, llmli'cM Manager.
hew V6rk omcc! 160 Kismu St.
s. & vnnntAND,
Bole Atrcnt for Forcljn AdrcrtMng.
Entered at tlm rotollien it Bcranton, r aj
Second CIiim Mill Matter.
When apaco will permit, Tho
Tribune la nlwnya glrtd to print
short lettors from Its friends bertr
. lug on current topics, but Its rule is
that thcoo must bo signed, fov pub
lication, by tho writer's real name;
nnd tho condition precedent to ac
ceptance lo that nil contributions
shall bo subject to editorial revision.
THE FLAT HATE FOIt ADVlinTlSIKa.
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SCRANTON JANIJARY 2, 1902.
It Is evident that tho present police
force can do good work II It trios. We
violate no confidence In saying1 that It
will henceforth try.
Look Cheerful.
N SOME eyes figures are dull
reading, but not tho figures of
local bank clearings In yester
day's Issue. When, after a per
iod of strikes and industrial discord,
made worse by tho removal of n. large
industry, Scranton can show a sain of
twenty per cent. In bank clearings nnd
nn increase of more than half it, mil
lion in savings deposits, it is very far
from being dull reading; it is the most
interesting reading that can bo recom
mended for that class of citizens, to be
found In every community, who make
a practice of looking on the dark, side
1 of things.
-Many other figures among those in
cluded in our comprehensive review of
tho dead year's local business achieve
ments are worth reading a scond time;
but the figures of bank clearings and
savings really include the others.
Stated in another way, they mean that
during tho year 1901 thero was an aver
age increase for each head of a Scran
ton family of nearly $30 in deposited
cash savings; and an average increase
in credit trading of nearly $600. That
is certainly a showing to encourage
new enterprise and help to redeem our
city from the ill-favor into which it
has fallen among investment seekers
at a distance, who have been feared
into distrust of Scranton by the nu
merous uncalled-for strikes, boycotts
and small acts of turbulence that we
have had.
The new year begins with every pros
poet encouraging. There is reason to
believe that the strike nnd boycott
ppldcmic has nearlj', if not wholly run
its course. Steps have been taken by
leading citizens to curb in future these
outcropplngs of misdirected enthus
iasm on the part of organized labor or
Its injudicious sympathizers. An op
portunity is before the community to
, secure what it has long needed, and
what is highly essential to its best
future development, namely, a first
class rapid transit system. The gen
eral outlook for trade Is in every direc
tion as bright as it wan a year ago;
nnd thero is less reason to expect an
interruption of work In the mines tho
coming spring than appeared then.
For some time our business men
have felt cautious and fearful. They
undoubtedly had provocation for some
of this feeling. But, in the light of
experience and in tho plain view of
tho favorable conditions just ahead, It
seems to us that they would now be
justified in laying aside the trappings
of gloom nnd in putting on the gar
ments o hopefulness once more. It
will bo the fault of nobody more than
themselves If the year 1902 shall not be
tho banner year in the history of
Scranton's industrial and commercial
development.
Tho Republican situation In Mew
York resembles armed harmony.
International Arbitration.
ANIMATED discussion has taken
place at the Pan-American
. congress In the city ot Mexico
over the question of arbitra
tion. Some of our South American
friends have becomo so enthusiastic
upon this subject that they are not
satisfied with signing a treaty provid
ing for arbitration In cases where both
parties desire it, but want an agree
ment drawn up which will liinlee nrhl
trajjjon compulsory in nil cases. It has
bqc.tl their exuberance over this matter
whRh has seriously imperilled tho sue
cesj? of' tho congress and Inspired the
receit reports that tho assemblage
would brealt up In a row.
Fortunately, wiser counsel has pre
vailed. A compromise has been estab.
lishpd by which those countiles that
desire to enter 'may do so and those
countries, nmomr which Is tho United
Stages, that, do not care to go so far
muyJuGxeo'to join in establishing nnd
maintaining n permanent arbitration
tribunal for tho western hemisphere,
similar to tho one established for the
worji at largo as an outcome, of The
Haguo -peace conference In other
wor$, ,a court whoso uood offices uro
at tU disposal of all who may want
thenu but having no compulsory power.
It.Jnay possibly bo asked why the
Viuttul States did not cast Its uto and
intlutmco In favor of compulsory aibl.
t ration, but this question hardly re
quires ,nn answer. In the flist, place,
thoracis absolutely no means by which
coininilslou could be brought to bear
uponjan Independent state to make it
uccept and abide tho adjudication of
iucha tribunal except by process of
inr, which would defcut the very ob
ject of arbitration. If to get arbltra.
Hon It Is necessary to have war, the
cheaper, und' quicker plan, obviously,
would, bpjjto iave Ue vdY jn-hu;fiist
instanceY Thero Is"uIso this especial
ibjet'tlon to compulsory arbitration
Paper Heading, jwiuon
Tza T2T3 .30
on .91 .24
in IK .10
.'. !lB5 .17 .1S
IS .IBS ! .
with J.ntltt-Amorlcnn races: thnt It
would tend to cndlcsn confusion. 11 Is
chnranlorlfltlu of these people that they
should want the millennium Introduced
nil nt once. Tho wiser way Is to ap
proach It one stop at a time.
This year ought to bo n Rrent one
for SctnMnn merchants who handle
good goods and use judgment in nd
vertlslng them.
Concerning Lnbcr Unions.
LAHOlt difficulties ot long
standing in certain targe
shops In Springfield having
recently come before tho Illi
nois state board ot arbitration for of
ficial notice, that body lias Just linuded
down an opinion ot general Interest.
After reviewing the evidence In the
case, which Is not material to the part
that Is ot general Interest, the board
proceeds: "This Is distinctly an age ot
co-operation, of the achievement of
results by concerted and harmonious
action for the common good of all,
wo witness today combinations ot
capital ot a mngnltudo scarcely dream
ed a quarter ot u century ago. There
have been In connection with some ot
these combinations results that have
created a widespread alarm; yet In the
sober second thought of tho nation, It
Is conceived that these combinations
are a necessary part of commercial
progress; that tho cvlla that have
arisen from them are of a purely In
cidental nature and ultimately will bo
minimized or completely eradicated by
proper legislation.
"So, likewise, the tendency toward
co-operation, to organize for the com
mon good and to attain a common end,
has extended to tho industrial masses
to such an extent that the labor union
Is now found In almost all trades and
occupations. That men In these organ
izations, suddenly clothed with largo
power, have sometimes exercised It un
wisely, and that the men composing
tho rank and file of tho organization
have sometimes acted upon bad coun
sel, Is undeniable. Yet this is far from
proof that such organizations are In
trinsically bad. On tho other hand,
growing experience has shown them to
be a powerful agency for good. We
fall to perceive any reason for denying
the worklngmcn the same right to
combine for their mutual benefit and
protection as is exercised with greater
freedom by their employers. The labor
union is based upon the recognition of
the potency of organization. Men
have learned In the great Industrial
struggle that man Is but an atom. If
he has a grievance standing alone ho
is powerless to redress it. But when
he has the united co-operation of his
fellows he is supported by a power
that at least must command atten
tion." These are fair and truthful words,
and we cannot imagine how any fair
minded Tnnn could possibly object to
them. The possibilities which are
within labor unions are great. But it
Is always timely to Inqulie If the trend
of trade-unionism Is In the right direc
tion. Can those who are leading this
movement justify its employement as
a club to beat down tho worklngman
who, In the ordeily exercise of his con
stitutional lights, decides that ho pre
fers not to join a labor union? Can
they Justify forcible interfetence with
this non-union worklngman when he
occupies a place that unionists on strike
have vacated? Is there any substan
tial justification for tho attempt, which
lies at tho bottom ot most of the trade
ulonlsm of our day, to make the union
an instrument for restricting the In
dividual capability ot Its members by
establishing arbitrary limits on pro
duction, so as to cripple the good work
er's efficiency in the vain attempt to
bolster up the Incompetent worker?
Those who oppose what appear to
them to be unjust and vicious features
of labor unions, and who frankly give
the reasons behind their belief, are not
enemies but friends ot organized labor.
Undoubtedly labor unions cut be so
led as to do great good, not only to
their immediate members, but also to
the entire community. They can also
bo made the instruments of nhnost in
calculable harm. There Is nothing so
sacred about a labor union as to make
fair criticism a sacrilege, nor about
tho average labor agitator as to entitle
him to do what he plenses, xegardless
of the consequences upon others. The
cause of the American worklngmnn In
not to be helped by an attitude of
blind sycophancy on tho part of those
who edit newspapers or hold public of
fice. Nor Is there any reason to be
hove that labor unions can be broken
up from without If those within are
satisfied that they are deriving sub
stantial benefit therefrom. If tho or
ganized labor movement Is under In
dlctment'ln this particular community
It Is because It has hero developed un
warranted excesses and fairly earned
tho ceusuro It has received. Until labor
unions can show to omployers very
clearly that their effect Is to make bet
ter rather than lef.s efficient and less
willing employes; In other words, until
the union la a means of Improving the
Individual member and making him a
beter woikor and a hotter citizen, thuie
can be no guneral recognition of labor
unions by employers except such as Is
forced, and that does not amount to
much,
Wo behove a time will come when
labor unions will merit general con
fidence nnd respect. Some of them al
ready have touched this piano and
others aru upprouchlug It, nut captious
stiikes, boycotts and the nrrogauco
that small men arc accustomed to show
when clothed with a little brief uuthor
It simply retard tho general recogni
tion which tho more ambitious labor
leaders seek and do unmeasured harln
to nil of labor's real Interests, This Is
a fact which Intelligent worklngmen
nuiBt sooner ur later face tho sooner
th& bettor.
One Stubblefield, a Kentucky genius,
claims to have found out how to har
ness the electrical energy of the eatth
so as to do away with wires In tele,
phoning. Already, It is said, ho has
thrown his voice si quarter of a mile.
That Is nothing. Colonel Wuttergon
bent that record long ago.
The Supremo court of North Dakota
has decided that any contract between
competing business Interests whereby
ulthcr ngiees to icatrlct output or dis
continue business Is Illegal. The court
recognizes tho right of one firm or cor
poration to nuichaso nnd then make
whatever disposition of tho properly of
n competing firm or corporation that It
may seo 111: but the competitors must
not get together In secret and set up
schemps for bleeding tho public, This
strikes us ns being sound judgment.
Certainly the most unlqtio proposition
yet advanced In the discussion of our
obligations to Cuba Is that ot tho beet
sugar growing Interests that tho United
States shall not reduce tho duty on
Cuban stmnr and tobacco, but glvo a
bounty to Cuban BUgur nnd tobacco
growers. When the American peoclo
consent to give a bounty to forelgneis
It will be some years hence.
American newspuper suspicions of
aermnny's good faith towards the
United States will become tiresome
some day. Then what will tho "yel
lows" print?
OPEN LETTER TO MR. CONNELL.
Hon. William Conncll. l
Sir: Itecognlzlnir your public Idler In tlili
morning' Iwie of the "IJcimbllciii" and tho
purport of Us toutciits, I gladly wtleumo It with
the ndiont of tho new .cnr, Your article If
bejond my trutlni; In detail UiouhIi its merit!
demand .1 volume ot n f u cine, und will cry
forcibly suggest lUdf to the attention of nil
citizens pilillmr tl.emehM In .1 loii'cicntiom
Interest In the wclfjic of their city. 1 fully ic
.1II70 jour position and tec Its Justification.
II!ting cujojnl for many jin a citizenship of
this (omiiioimcaltli, mid nioio pulkulaily of
lato the plcasmc mid ill-tlni Hon of being 11
icsldcnt of Scinufon, ot which o arc an lion
mcil and public sonant of the people, It natur
ally follow that any btncllls to the city that
will ledound to the common good 0 In peo
ple I welcome with concern. Such Rood, If not
lomlns directly lliroutrli your intlncnce 1 et
Kicct its consummation if but helped by the
people's lcpicscnt.ithe in cor.srcM, whom I tiike
the libel ty of nildrcsliiir, I'tirthcr, 1 hac lor
m my j cms In liew of such, cnteitnlncd of you
the opinion of licir.g actuated with the noblest
inotlics looking to jour city's piogrcss and Its
pood name. Your letter ot this Xew Year'!, day
fully couoboratcs my lone established opinion of
you nnd of which jcu ale the descried object
of this letter. Ycm,
1'iedcriil: HiUnoll.
Scranton, January 1, VM2.
Outline SUidi?s o!
HiirRan NaUire.
Colonel Parsons' Great Ride.
Colonel K. Illoi Parsons, of Xcw Yoil:, was
brcictled gcneial for distinguished tervlce
duilng tho war, but chai ictcristic mod
esty forbade the mo of that title when he
iclumed to Chilian life. Xot only did he per
f 01 in the only authentic feat of decapitation dur
ing the Ciul War, but ho was the heio of a
leuiarKablc battle ride. A few dais bcfoio the
battle of Gettysburg was fought, Onrral Meade
had an impoitant messago to send to (icnci.il
Maiding, one hundred miles distant. As the
route was tlnough a counliy swaimlng with
iclipl, tho nic-sage wis wiltten 011 tissue paper,
that might be swallowed in ease tho canlcr
was captuied. The commander was in doubt ic
garding a suitable mi.sengi r. lie summoned
tleneral Duis to lic.idqu.utoi.
"(lencial, who is the liaiclc-t lider lis well as
the most tiu-tnoilbj man in thcRnicc?" a.ked
Jleade.
"Colonel 1'auoiH, sii," was the piompt icply.
"Send him to 1110 .it once."
II was 0 o'clock on a Momliy night whin Hcn
er.il Jleade Bin the oun,r otficei liis Intiuc
tioi'.s. He was to tide with nil luslo to Hernial
ll.udlng'.s he.ulquarteis nnd uluin at once with
an miawcr.
'J ho liip-dcngcr letiicd. T.io bundled miles
weie to be coieiod. 'the loads were heaij and
they led tbiougli the enciny'i. lountiy.
llvaetly at neon the following day, I oloiu-l
I'.Usons cntcicil Ccni.nl Me.ido'.s teur. 'Die lit
tci's face- glow pin pic wllh lage and he lipped
out 11 stilng of caths.
"Is thi-. tho way .1011 obey oidtrsV" be tliuii
ill ml. "What ale ,1011 haugiiq,' .uniind i.u.ip foi?
011 oulit to bo with (iuici.il lhidiug b.i t'lls
time."
"I hai t- just lotmiied from (iiiui.il Mauling,
sir."
"You lie!" cm.1 limed the ea-.pei.ittd genual.
l'al-sjlis' fice paled, and be dug the uilln into
Ids hinds to n-ti.iln htmclf. "(luicral Meade,"
he said, in 11 olcc that lll-couiciled his anger.
"If joii weie nut my commanding ollleu I
would knock joii down for tint iu-ult."
Without the foinnlitv of .1 salute, he turned
on his heel and left the tint, .fcadp afli'inaul
nude an ample apology,
Colonel 1'airoiis Killed two hoi-es and iunt
himself without .1 panicle in food, l'or eigh
teen horns he was imt nut of the miMIc-Dinger
Ciuimieicial.
His Nervo Brought Popularity.
Tin- maiden ihvlIi of 1'ili.ile John Allen, of
Jlb-sLsslppI, ill the home of lcpie-entatlws
pioied a lucky one and tool; 1111 instant and se
nile, hold of the nmiailar appendage of the
bouse, which lie held to the end, kijs the Chi
cago fhionkle. The linr ami hiiboi- bill was
up. John wanted to oltii- an .11111 iidnunt making
an appioprlatlon foi the Tninblgbee incr. The
chairman of tho committee, Mr, UHIi", of Ken
tucky, had piomi-cd him time mid had then for
gotten it, .lohu a-ked mi. minion, consent to ail-dre-s
the home and Yi'illls tiled to hilp him get
it, but someone objected, wheii'iipon John, with
teais in Ills lolce mid looking doleful 11s a lilted
mourner at .1 luneial, Mill, with incline holy
accent:
"Well, I should at least like to halo permis
sion to print huiiic icmaiks in tho llecoid ami
Insert 'f.aughtei nnd applause' In apptoprluo
places."
That was hl astonishing eNoidliun. 'J he pal
pablo lilt at one of the most common abuses of
tho house, "the lc.uo to inlnf," tickled the
mcuihi'is giratly mid he seemed the 1111 minions
consit'.t which lio de-lied. Ifo elo-ed that speech
with an iimazlng ohlhUlou of gall, which added
to his fame mole thin tho rpeccli itself, lie
wound up bj sajing:
".Sow, .Mi. SpeiKir, liiilni; fully answered nil
tho aigumcnts of my opponents, I will letiic to
tho rtojkiooiii a few momenta to locelie the coi.
Kl.ltul itlmis of ndmlilng Mends," which set tho
liou.e wild with delight.
lie did letiio t the cloal.ioom and did re
ceiie the lonauliil itlniis of admiring ftiendj, a
performance which Ins been going on a ficqucn;
luten,iN eier since.
A Marls Twain Story.
Mail. Twain tells thus tho stoiy of Ids fii.t
gieat f.ondcn banquet, at which, by tho'wij,
theie wcio 800 or POO, gunU Ho admits Hut,
not lining been uad lu that Mud ot u dinner,
lie felt somewhat lonc-uinc, "I'liu lout mayor, or
somebody, 11.nl out 11 lUt of the ihlet gnosis
liefoii) we began to cat. When he canio in
pioiiiluent 11 lines tho other gueats ivuuM ap
plaud. "1 found the man nct 1110 rathrr a good talker,
dust 11s ui got to au intiiulliig ..ulijcct there
was 11 tremendous clapping of hands. I lad
haidly cut heard sinh nnplitiso liefofc. I
stialghU'iicc! up and sit to clapping with the
Hit, and I nollicd :i good many peojib 1011111I
about mu IKiug their attention on me, nnd some
of t lie 111 laughing in a fticniljy mid encouraging
way, I mou'd about in my chair and clappeel
louder than our. t
"'UI10 (s lt(' I a.ki'd the gentleman cu lay
I Wit.
" 'Samuel Clcuitns, better Known in Knglmd as
Maik Twain,' he icpllcd.
"I stopped clapping. Tin) life seemed la go
out: ot lue, 1 li'; w I' iras lu such a lis in all my
dai."-M. A. 1'.
A King's Apology.
Kin; James II one day lost conic important
papers. He hunted for them until at hit ha
got Into a gieat Jgu Wcauo ha couldn't flml
tin in. Then lie met an old Scotch sonant, who
Inul been 11 long I Imo in bis sen ice, und cluiged
libit wllh the lews, (ilh (that via his name!) aaldj
Hut ho knew nothing of tlieiii. Hut the King
Brew my aiUJty and said! "Olb, remember, I
gavo them to jou to take cute of; what "rto
yqu done) with them!" (ill) M on hi? knees and
declared that he die) not letoho them. Thtn the;
king kicked him as lie Knelt at his fret. Oil)
rosu ami left (ho apartment, njlng: ''1 hue ab
ways, been faithful lo your tnajcuty nnd 1 line
not itcwnccl ruch treaiinenl, I c.tmiol remain
In jour tcrilce. t thill litter cc ott ngalnl"
Not long nfler, (he peuon to whom tha King
hml atfuttly rIicii Iho pipcu returned them.
The king win nhimcd of his conduct and Rent
Rotncon? niter the old tenant. Ycry reluctantly,
(lib came again Into the royal pimciicc, when
the King got doiwi on his knees bcfoio him aiuf
Mild that he would not rise until ho torgaic him.
The tenant tried to ci.nlo the matter niul begged
his master lo rise, hut he Would not till assured
that the Insult wait fully forgiven.
It Is a maxim In 11 monarchy that "Hie King
can do no wrong." It la pleasant to nnd ono
who, having clone a wrong, iras humble cnouzli
to confess it and beg pardon, cien of n fcrvant.
The American floy.
In tho Interest of Science.
A well known Australian visited his friend,
l'rof. lllee, at tho latter'n laboratory. Tho pro
fessor was fxanilnliiB n daik brown miliatmicc
pprcad on piper. "I fay, would you kindly lot
me place n bit of this 011 sour tongue? My
taste has become vitiated by tasting nil torU of
thlnjs."
'"Ceitalnly," responded the ovcr-nccomodnlliig
visitor, holding out Ms tongue.
The professor look up n little of the substance
under ni.al.iHls mid placed It on the othcr'n
tongue. The latter woiked It around for fully
a minute, tasting it much as he would n line
confection.
".Vote any effect J" Inquticd the piotessor.
"Xo, none."
"It doesn't piraljze or pilck jour tongue!"
Wot that I can detect."
"1 tliomht not. There are no alkaloids in It,
then. How does 11 taste!"
"Hitter as the clltkcns."
"Item-in nil right."
"What Is It!" inquired the lisltor.
"I don't Know. Tint's what I'm tijing to find
out. Some ono hail been poisoning hoiscs with
itl"-Silncy lleiald.
How a Senator Was Victimized.
Senator Deboe, ot ' Kcniiickj-, was standing In
the lobby ot his hotel the other day when Nnt
Cureton, ot I.oulsillle, came hustling put, rnllse
in baud, leiatcs a Washington correspondent of
the Chicago News. Curclon Is n constituent of
the lenalor'f, so the latter felt roinpelleel to
show some lntcict. lie asked where Cureton wua
golnr.
"Home," rame the laconic reply. Then .1 sul
den idea seemed to stilkc the tiaicler, and he
turned to the senator, sajlug:
"It's 11 shame to go home without taking tome
little present to jour namesake, senator."
"iVIiy, bale jou got n child luiticcl after me!"
naked the senator, his face beaming.
"Sure tiling. Ills 11.11110 is William," came the
answer.
"Well, heie, jou don't go home without sonic
thing for that boy," s-ald Debuc, ns ho dug down
in ills pocket and bioiight out a shiny $5 gold
piece nnd gave it to Cuieton.
"I forgot to tell him," said Cureton, as he
watched the lui keeper linking the gold-piece
Into cold drinks, "that William Cuieton was
born about ten jcarn bcfoie Dcboc ccr EUpcctod
that a public career was before him."
A Justiflahle Homicide.
"Prisoner," said Hie judge austerely, "jou ire
charged with minder, which in this region id a
crime. Arc jou guilt or wcic jou brought up in
Kentucky!"
"If It plcsse j'our honor," replied the piisoner,
"I will lelate the ciicimistaiices, and as to my
guilt will be guided to n decision by jour opin
ion. The gentleman who is no inoie. a lesidc-it
of Xew York cltj', came to me at mj- home anJ
said: 'The ouithtow of Tammany is a stiiking
proof of the wisdom and ihtue of the misses, .1
memorable cleinon'tratinn of tho nine ot the
1111lwif.1l sulfiagc in municipal alhilis, a shup
libnkc to Mr. Hewitt.'
"I admit, jour Itonor, that 1 killed the in in
the moment lie bad done speaking."
"Where is jour home!" tho judge aked, not
tiiisjmp.itlietic.illj'; "where did this occur."'
"An uutfiwiiid fate," upllcd the piisoner,
"compVls me to liic in Philadelphia."
"Let the piisoner go," said the judge, and the
prosecuting attorney left the couit without .1
s I ilh upon bis leputation. Aiiihrcs Itince 111
San rr.inci-eu i:1111I11tr.
1
Joke on a iNew York Author.
A Xew- Yolk nun who has wiltten a book was
telling about it the other iliv to a filend who
hid once dotio him .1 senhe.
"lly the waj-," Slid the author. "I would be
delighted lo give jou a copj- of iny wolk if jou
cue for it."
"I should lie mine than phased to li.no it,"
was the icpl.v; "i-peeiallj- if jmi will wiite jour
name in ft."
"All light. 'I here Is .1 lino', stoic just aiound
the cornel. If jem will .ucompaiij me, we will
gei the ie and get It. 1 don't happen to h.ne a
copy in mj ofl'.ee Ju-l now."
Attn lliej- hid stopped lo ulince at sonii. of
the new things in the book stole the .uitli ir
hailed a clt'th, ami, pn-hlng bis 1 best out lory
fir, asked foi the noiel that lie bad il'.lcn.
"Ye,, mi," the clciK Slid. "We line It
aiound Hie soniewheie, I belteie. but Jem ilia
the (list one who bis eui a-knl fer .1 cupv, and
it mij take mi- some time to find it. Wouldn't
nciiiictliing' el"0 do j !-t as iiell? We line 11 gie.it
many better bucks at the suine pi lee. "Wash
ington Pl.11.
No Friend of His.
The lti'V. Dr. LeUhlon l'.uU, leetoi of llm
nianiiel churcli, is noted for his skill in tepartee.
Ho is nl.o a gooil stct.v teller, but it Is as .111
oilglnntor of funny sajlngs tint lie has won c
peciil dlstliietiou,
Xot long be-foio lie sailed for Duiupe he was a
gu.Y-t at a public dimiei, On Ids len sat a jnun;
man who liad toutraeted the lnblt of piofanJtj',
and the habit wan so strong Hint it bad got be
jond his coiitiol, The J'ouug man had 11 par
ticular weakness foi the uujio--Ioii. "Oh. the
deill!" Ho ii-cd it thoughtlessly and without in
tention to giie nifeiise, Imt it seemed to sorie ns
a sort of punctuation foi cwciy sentence lie ut
teied. rinally, a fuend of the joimg man thought it
necessaiy to cite him .1 hint, and said to him:
"You'd better be a llttlo cucful of jour c--picssions.
You'io sitting ncU to t lie itev. Di,
l.clghton 1'atks."
'"llio devil!" said the joung mm in surpiise,,
And then, lecovciing Ids iirescueo of iiiiuel, he
tinned to the clngjnian nnd nude a iciy polite
atiology.
"Oil, jou needn't apologize to me," sild tho
doctor, "lite deill Is no fi'lcnd ot iniiie." Dos.
ton lleiald.
His Client Not Insane.
Theie is 110 moiu dlstlnguishecl adioeato at
tho Yiiglnla lur than iseuator Jolm W. Hauled,
s.ij.s t lie Clilcago Chlonlcle, Ills eloquence H
knoiMi tlio ibiinlry ovci, 11 ml he Is a's famous for
his wit as for Ids gieat legal attainments. Miort
ly after the war, lie wa I'icueiutlug a moun
taineer in one ol the western counties foi foi
gei.v. 'Jho toutt lull's at the- lime weuo iciy las-,
niul It was cuiiiiium tor lawjcis lu (oiiinient open
ly in com t concerning tho unci ot their col
leagues. On this especial occasion, Mi, lliuicl
had Just asked the piisoner a ury pointed ques
tion concerning1 another shady tiaiesaetion, other
Hun the 0110 for which he :u being tried, when
a lanjrr for whom the attorney did not liaie Hie
Kindest feelltgs, aiosci ami leiii.nkcil:
"May It please jour honor, 1 would 1 fl.es to
state, for the benefit of Hie state, that the cle
feudant 011 one uc,capu filed to toige niy ii.iins
to check, li ut"
Tinning quickly around, Senator Daniel gato
the lawjer a searching look, and then, mining
to tho judge, rcmaihcd;
"It the couit pltae, 1 would like to uy that
I am not tryinj to piomi the, prisoner insane."
His French Not Appreciated.
John Drew, the) actor, speaks l'rcuth with an
etc client accent, ot which he is p irilouably
I loud, and hence ho was immensely pleased
when Mine, llernhardt said to him leeciiUyj
"You must leally come to Paris and appear in
a 1'arUlaii theater; j'eo In my theater and play
with inc."
Mr, Diew wan mtuiullv flitteied to have hit
French to greatly appreciated. He felt several
Inches tnllei us ho uiiswend:
"Itcallj-, Mine, lleruhardt, this U most gratify.
In;. What sort ot a pait would jou like to .laid
me play!"
"Oil," said Mine, llnnhardt, wllh her lwectct
sinlie, "mturallj-, tho pait ol an DiglUImiait."
"SHAOKLETT'S" TOUTIOAIi
PHILOSOPHY,
"Shucklett," "Walter Barr's now und
successful novel, published by the .p
FINLEY'
AilLY ARRIVAL
OP
r
Spring
s
Fine
Scotch
Silk
Qing
Latest
Cheviots
In great assortment on ex
hibition this week at
UCUffMM
ways Busy
Our H1I2 Muney-Saviuff Sale begins to
day. "With every pair of our feet it ml
hcaUh-suvInis" allocs you gel a Fhoe
Hhlner fiei.
s
114-116 Wyoming Ave.
Allis-Chalniers Co
Successors to Machine Business ot
Dickson Manufacturing Co., Scranton
and "WUkes-Carre, Pa.
Stationary Engines, Boilers, Mining
Machinery, Pumps.
pletons, gives us the following aphor
isms of practical politics:
belief is the binUiar-funtl ot politics.
'Hie Mine tilcl: won't woiK twice in the name
town,
The first maxim in politic Is to tal.e no chance,
that can be molded.
1 teally like tie woman In politic wlen the
19 a politician, foi jou can depend on lid.
When tho police line nabbed Hie stal.es, wlut'd
the uso cf Keeping en plajini? the gamo?
If jou unlit stop nt any laiine. at all, jou'd
better not try to climb the mountain ot politics,
hut stick lo the Hits.
When the other fellow lt.n .1 belter lian.1,
tlit-ic'H iioiIiIiik: to do but tn put juut caids in
thu dtik wllhcnit his ccins tlicm.
1 am uoiiii; to Join tho leimin clcuicut Irre
III tho city tu Imiiiicn the major and some other
people that I don't like.
Oh, jou'll mid out iilck ruouxh if jou'U ie
ineinbor to let the other fellow do mo.t of tho
talking; while jou lad; wUc and boird and jc t
Klllllll
I'io ueier pocd an a puillan in polities, Yuu
mlKlit an well try to maKo a piopector out ut
11 tetuUituot as to tipect to l.iako .1 politician
out of n preacher.
WhcneuT jou'ie in doubt in polities or states
manship, lead up on the life of Lincoln. It's the
Ilil.lt of the ically successful pollticliu who ai
plrc aboio the Iculslatiue.
They miglit s.iy ie w,i a rtscal, and a caterer
lo all the hater delimits, without liiirliui; liiiii
much, but If thy hid a pittl) kood cusc of ilch
iiur palm aeraiust him, l.c wai liuUhed.
Succct3 In politics! roiie.-pouclj to light in other
lliin,i, and It is liaid tu Keep n clevr hc.nl when
iiiisiicci'isful III pnlltlcj, 114 It la clllhciilt to plan
well with a guilty coii-eicnie In dally lite,
Kolhiug; makes a 11...11 weak or jou like flat,
tciliiff liim by cilliue; him out cf bed In the mid
dle ot the night on account of the Importance
of jour mcbatjo n,u' tho extent of his inltiiciice,
Tho oppenitiou wai by 110 fucaiii an tlmplc 11
tlilm; 114 the liitaulbli (otco which It uppojed;
opposltloM aie alwuyii complex unlew they con
sist of one man each, and then thej aie called
ci a 11k j.
You can cliuili out 011 u limb for some distance
all light, but If jou ciawl out too fur, down
J911 dtup. You ion git pretty fat away fioni
tho ten commandments lit politics, hut when
you get clear to the door of lladj jou're mighty
likely to get tho t,tiilnr.tf KnucKcd out ol jou in
the moat guipritlus aj,
You can't aluujy tell what a man will do, for
theie aie all KI111U ot picii In polltict; but tlieie
ate only two Klnda ot women; the one-) tlut
want to run politic.) as they do a chinch, but
they don't amount tu much lu ic.ultnj und tho
one. that toko the bull by the) lioriu and do in
politic tu the politician! do, and they go the
whole thin,,',
tj) juv
I IfEllE
r p
-
IT" ' -T,1 N?"," iS
iAay0in))a
This store is Scranton's
p and Doll Store all the year ail
A n-3 tile best place to buy
ies Ice Ci
1 Ices
Etc., at Wholesale or Re
1 Most Appetizing ljiiiiclit!oiis ll
a i) 1 in hi; liooin.
.... ,L,M
K
312-314 Lackawanna
((fMJM?MOK?M?)0(((?)()
ooooooooooooooooooooocxx
TUP NATIONAL
OF" SCRANTON.
Organized 181
Depositary of the United a
Capital, $200,000 Surplus, .'
'J'lio illKumitU rato tn clo)ionltori li 5 per cent, per nnniij
bpt'rlnliittctillon given to nil iiccauiitrt ivliotlior lurol
Open fciitttiil'ij-ovcnltr;i 8 to i) I'cleiijt.
'J luce per cant, Inlcrcit paid on sin lugs clopo?lti.
Interest compounded Jumiury 1st unci July Ut.
WILLIAM CONKELL. Presidont.
HENRY BBLIN, JE Vioo ProsidJ
William Connoll, Jaraos Arohl
Honry Bolin, Jr., Luther Kellcl
Goo. H. Catlin. J. Bonj. Dtr
A Thomas H. Watkins, Jamea I. Uoa
X W. D. Zohnder.
6
ooooooooooooooooo ooooooool
ami wm wMttttissBzssmiEasmBZ.
Are You
a I over of
I the Renutiiul ?
Doyouwlsh to have pretty rings? jJ
TT a9.fll I.M HlnnnnJ .s el.nn. 1.1
W U Will uu piuaqcei CU i.4U.V
a.. (-.IIIaIh. Tlinmnn.l UIC!
IH yuu slUllLUllc Aillliuuim j.....!-,,
S Diamond nnd Emerald Einjrs,
Uiamontt ana lwuny itings, xiia
mond nud Opal Eings, Diamonds
and Sapphire Bings, Diamond
and Turquois Kings. Ve will
mount any desired combination
to order.
I
E. SCHIHPFF,
317 Lacka. Ave
t3
I. j
ESH3aESS2ESSEESEi;
jaEa
17
nl
EDUCATIONAL.
fin
Puitton
By a recent act of the legisla
ture, free tuition Is now granted
at the
Literary Institute
and
State Normal School
Bloonisburg, Pa.
to all those piepavlns to teach.
This fcliool maintains courses
of study for teaeheis, for thoso
prepni-liiR for collejro, tind for
those stuUyliie music.
It will pir to write for particulars.
No otlier tchool offew sucli minerlor aj
lunticBs at ui-li low ratea. Aclclu'si
J. P.Wolsl, J. H, PI. ft.Piin.
SCRAHT0N COUBE3PONDEH0E SOKOOU
tiCUANrON, I'A.
T. J. 1'o.ter, I'lCiicljut. i:imr II. Lavrsll, Ireil
It. J l-otcr, Stanley l'. Alien,
Vice Preilelent. Secrclar7.
lyrCTTCTTry.TT-T.TCTrrg'giraaaEa
eadquarters
for
Incandescent
Gas Mantles,
Portable Lamps.
THE NEW DISCOVERY
Kern Incandescent
Gas Lamp.
-
Ounsterforsylh
233-327 Peiiu Avenue.
IflSi
iwm
Free
WlajLIABl JbL.
DIRECTORS.
EEEEESU553a3HSS
A
re ei
There is as nl
rUnmonds as till
faces, and notl
much hidden di!
.. .1..1 In Tm.ttI
is yuee w.a. eu mji
3 to us. Toti car
judgment and rel
E. SC!
317 Laci
!33E2n2s32S2SI
ilili &
There car
appropriate J
of the folloxj
of which are!
. plain figures:
WrltliiK J)c-sl,i.
Drcsoini: Tallies
Tanci Tallies,
C'licial Claasi'..
I'm lor Cnlilnrts,
jlnslu Paliini'is,
C'llllu Cnllllle'l ,
llonl. Case-",
bercens.
Jlemia fl
Low prices!
assortment to j
of well madcl
able patterns.
Hill & K
131 N. WnshlJ
A Second!
Gity w
First-Class
Got 61
Sterling Si
M
IUUU
Suitabl
Wedding
Mercereali
132 Wyominl
nolida