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THE SCRANTON TRIBUMJj-SATUltDAY, DECEMBER 2, 1890.
Publlthed Dally. r,xrpt Sunday, by The
Tribune PuMlnhlns Company, nt Fifty
Cents a Month.
New York Offlc! 15ft Nn.nu St..
fl. S. VIiniJLAND.
Bole Acent for Forelcn Advcrtlslntf.
Entered nt the PnMnMlce nt Bernnton.
Pa., as ScccndClas Mall Matter.
When rpnce wilt permit, Tho Trlbuno
la always clad to print fhort letters riom
Its frlcr.d henrlnc on current topic
but Its rule Is that there must be oliineu,
for publication, by the writer's real name.
8CRANTON, DECKMBEH 2. 1899.
TWELVEPAGES.
The pnd of the Nuntlcokc ftrllse will
be hailed with tlr-llght. Minora In that
rcftlon since August liavo lost nearly
$000,000 In wage. Concessions en nil
Hides Hint will make uoik for 4 000
men nre timely and Indicate that at
last there Is proper sentiment bctweoil
capital and labor In that vicinity.
American Heroism.
THE CASH of the Manauensj
affords another Illustration
of what mny bo accom
plished by pluck and biav
cry in times of great peril. As re
ports Indicate by the heroism and sang
fiold of 400 A met lean soldiers the rot
ten transport Manauense, from San
rrunclsco to Manila, was brought into
port after tho worthless otllreis and
erow had deserted their duties.
For twelve days the soldieis balled
the shin with buckets and boxes, filed
the engine bolleis. and lived upon beer,
whiskey and haul t,irk. The transport
was unsea worth,, undermanned and
short of piovls-Mons. I3.v little short of
a miracle and only by the extiuordln
ai y exertions of tlie soldiers she wai
taken Into Manila and a great tragedy
of the sea averted. Had the soldleis
been content to bow to clreumrtanc'i
without making an effort for their
lives, it is certain that the leaky old
ship would have been at the bottom
of the se.i by tills time. Hut the sol
dleis had no Idea of giving up the
light th.il had been abandoned by the
.allots, and they woiked menlly on,
laughing at the hau'.ships forced upon
them until the lotten hulk sailed into
port. These men are of the light stult
to do credit to their country on the fir
ing line.
It is scarcely probable that General
Joubeit has ever Intimated that he
would curry on giieillla warfare if le
pulsed by the Uiitlsh. This hort of
proceeding may do for bavages, but
the Boers have thus far demonstrated
that they aie conducting civilized warfare.
tlinn eighty neres of wlirat land at
ten bushels to the acre, or than sev
eral bundled sheep. Tin' creamery
and cheese factories ot Houth Dakota,
have had quite as much to do with
the state's new piosperlty as have the
largo wheat j!oW of the last throe
yeais. It Is yearly becoming more and
more a dairy state, and Its butter and
cheese stand near the head In tlu
markets. The change Is In every re
npeet a good one. Theie Is less uncer
tainty In dallying than In almost nny
other department on the farm, and if
tills Industry can be thoroughly estab
lished It will tnke more than one or
two bad wheat vears to shako tho
piosperlty of South Dakota.
HUMAN NATURE STUDIES.
Reminiscent of Webster.
As a back-handed slap nt a
well
Auulnaldo's follow ois will aoon be
ledltced to the occupation of bus.li
w hacking and maiiufaetuilng moon
shine whiskey, If they wish to bother
the United States government.
N
The Endless Chain Swindle.
(Prom the Washington Rtni )
XU OF Til 11 surest signs of
I R the general state of prosper
V Ity is the appearance of
many forms of ingenious
swindles disguired ns opportunities to
invest money and make large profits.
One of the latest deKs of tills Kind
has a familiar appearance. It is the
"endless chain" principle applied to
so-called banking.
The plan Is simple, and doubtless, to
come people, nttractiw1 and plausible.
The piojector, who Is under arrest Just
now In New York, proposed to sell to
an "agent" a book of four coupons, for
which he pays Jl. He is to sell the
coupons at 2." cents each and then
turn In his stub. The purchaser of
each coupon is requited to turn it In
ns a voucher to peimlt the purchase of
a book. As soon as all four coupons
have been thus turned In the holder cf
the original book Is entitled to receive
i" In cash, a certain number of shares
tn a company organl7ed for unnamed
purposes, or an equivalent in merchan
dise. Thus on Its face it appeals pos
sible for an Investor to secure for $1
If he buys his bonk direct from the con
cern as an "agent," or $1.25 If he buys
It by way of coupon at least $4, count
ing the Pale of coupons, a piofit from
LMO to I'OO per cent, on each transac
tion. Apparently the "bank" is a loser.
But the manipulator explains, this by
asserting that he is willing to pay thus
for advertising his principal scheme,
for which the shares are issued.
This flimsy excuse will not stand tho
test of u little figuring. The coupon
system embraces the mojt startling
possibilities. Staitlng with one oper
ator, assuming that In each case nil
four coupons are sold nnd cause fcur
books to start afiesh, In ten turns of
the "chain" there will be Involved no
less than 1,201,103 persons, assuming,
of course, that the same, ones do not
purchase coupons In succession. The
swindler figures on a profit from those
who, after starting a book, fall to se
cure four puicimsuis for their coupons.
Out of over a million, should the game
go so far, this percentage of failures
would be sulllcienllv latge to permit
the "bank" to suspend operations and
depait for other scenes and other
games.
All eaily holiday trade is said to bo
one of the best evidences ot present
piosperlty.
Wireless Telegraphy.
HV EXPERIMENTS arc be
ing made r.t Vienna to dem
onstrate thu possibility of
communication between bal
loons by wireless telegraphy, and thsy
have met with some success. A cap
tive balloon takes the place ot tlu;
tall mast as used In tin, Marconi sys
tem. A copper wire Is stretched be
tween It and the eaith, where the
tiansmlttlng nppaiatua Is placed. The
second balloon, which uecends freely,
carries the receiving instrument and
Is furnished with a wire sixty feet
long hanging downward ftom the bas
ket. The balloons rece'ved and trans
mitted m-ssages up to a distance ot
six nilkH and at an elevation of about
a in lie.
Of course, the great difficulty will be
to establish a tiansmiUlng sf.tlon in
a flee balloon, both on necount of the
weight of the necessary appaiatU3
and also because there Is danger of
flNchnrges fiom the powerful con
denser so neur the Inflammable gas of
the balloon.
Restlessness In Cuba appears to de
velop In a manner that would Indicate
that it Is the result of labots of a few
agitators rather than anything else.
The difficulty seems to be that some
aspiring, hot-headed persons don't
want a gradual change from military
to civil life, but wish to take the Jump
to Independence and office at once.
That Is to be decided In Washington,
and doubtless will bo considered In the
light of icports furnished by our own
administrators In Cuba. It is scarcely
believed, however, that as many are
inclined towards revolution as alarm
ists would imagine. The plight of the
Filipinos at this time will doubtless
prove a warning to the handful ot
mischief makers, who ought by this
time to leallze the futility ot an, at
tempt to alter the programme for thei1'
welfare so wisely arranged by the gov
ernment of the United States.
known member of congress who Is too
fond of looking upon the wino when It
Is an.' ned, Mr. Depcw, In the Saturday
Evening Post, tells this anecdote:
"The member of congress was being
shaved by tin nged colored barber In
Washington. The shop was a favorite
one with the prominent men of tho
capital, and thV old darky who presid
ed over It often boasted thnt ho had
Fhaved every great statesman since the
Madison ndmlnlstintlon, which may or
may not have been true. The member
of congress referred to was being
shaved by tho veteran one day, when
he said to the latter:
" 'Uncle, you must havo shaved
many famous men?'
" 'Oh, yes, sah; I has Indeed.'
" 'And a great many of those famous
personages must have sat In this very
chair vfheri' I am sitting, eh?'
" 'Dat's right, sah. Dey's set Jos'
whar yo' Is a scttln' dls moment, sah.
Yes, sah. An' I'so Jes been n notlcln'
a mighty cur'us similarity between yo'
and Dan'el Webster, has.'
" 'Vou won't say!' exclaimed tho
highly delighted law-maker. 'Is the
similarity in the shape of my head,
Uncle?'
" 'Oh, no, sah. 'Taln't dat.'
" 'Is It my manner?'
" 'No, boss, 'taln't yore manner, nud
der; hit's yore brcif.' "
Croker Fond o Animals.
Richard Croker is fond of animals
and birds. He never takes a walk In
Central Park without stopping to
watch the antics of the monkeys, re
lates the New Yoilc Yv"orld.
"Clausen." said Mr. Croker to the
park commissioner one day recently,
"why don't you call that big black
faced monncy you have In the menag
erie Frank Moss?"
"The newspapers would Jump on me."
replied Commissioner Clausen.
"Well," exclaimed Mr. Croker, "when
there was a reform commissioner up
there, the biggest tiger In tho menag
erie was called Croker."
Just after the great Tammany vic
tory of 1SS8 Mr. Croker and a party of
Wigwamltes went to SaybrooK, Conn.,
to spend a few days. Late one after
noon Mr. Croker was missed. He was
hunted for, but could not be found
for nearly two hours. When found he
was a mile away from the hotel,
perched on a fence watching a yard
full of barnyard ducks.
"There can't be much money In rais
ing ducks," said Mr. Croker. "They
are still hungry an J have had two
bushels of corn since I've been here."
every ono woa waiting for a wind ask
ed; "What slang expression which you
havo In American pleases a pussy
cat?"
The listeners nil gave It up, of course.
"Why, rubber neck," was the reply.
Ono of Sir Thomas' British friends
heard It, and thought It was so good
that he culled a friend up to hear the
conundrum. The ono summoned came
nil expectnncy. Tho enthusiastic ad
mirer of tho story could not wnlt for
the young woman who had originally
sptung the Joke to repeat It, but start
ed to tell It himself.
"What slang expression which you
have In America plenses a pussy cat?"
he asked.
"Why. smooth her back," was the re
ply, and the answer brought out a
greater roar than h l greeted the orig
inal story.
The Only Easy Subjects.
For many years Clark Hell has been
engaged upon the Supreme Court of
the United States and Provinces of
North Ameilca, which alms to give a
sketch of every American Judge, re
lates the Saturday 1'vcnlng Post. A
Judge to whom he was explaining tho
many difficulties ot the tisk said:
"I suppose that even magistrates b-
have like ordlnnry mcrtnls whenever
they find themselves the victims
errors?'1
"Do they?" remarked Bell slowly.
"The only ones who give no trouble,
are those who are dead."
WITH THE POETS.
The City of Sleep.
Over the edge of the purple down,
Where the single lutnplight slcams,
Know yo the road to the Merciful Town
That Is laid by the sea of tho Dreams-
Whcre the poor may lay their wrongs
aw ay.
And tho sick may forget to weep?
Hut we pity us alii pity usl
We wakeful; oh! pity us!
Wo must go back with Policeman Day
Hack from tho City of Sleep.
Weary they turn from tho scroll and
crown,
Fetter and prayer and plough
They that go up to the Merciful Town,
For her gates nre closing now.
It Is their right In tho paths of Night
Body and soul to steep;
But wo pity usl ah! pity us!
We wakfful; oh! pity us!
We must go back with Policeman Day
Back from the City of Sleep.
to the publicity given to her Chicago
philanthropies and has never allowed
her portrait to bo printed.
Professor Kvander B. McQIlvary has
succeeded Professor Jnmes Hcth In tho
Incumbency of the Sago Professorship ot
Mornl Philosophy of Cornell university.
Tho appolrtmcnt of Miss Munro to tho
pnstornte of the Brothcrton Congrega
tional church Is believed to bi ilie tlrtit
Instance In England of such a piuccedlng.
I.od Dunravcn denies thnt Sir Thomas
l.lpton asked for tho use of the Vul
kyrle ns a "trial horse," and that ho re
fused to nccommodato him In this re
spect. Dr. Edwnrd J. James, professor of pub
Ho administration In tho University of
Chicago, willed recently lor Antwerp. He
Is commissioned to look Into municipal
administrations In Europe, particularly
In Germany, Franco nnd England.
I.ady Collcv, widow of Sir Ucorgo Col
ley, the vicltlm of MnJuba Hill, Is now
Mrs. Wcntworth B. Beaumont, having
In 1S01 married tho squire, of Breton Halt,
In Yorkshire. Ono of her stepsons Is W.
C. B. Beaumont, M. P., I.lbernl member
for tho Hexham division of Northumber
land. Joseph Wood, tho oldest lncomotlvo en
gineer in tho United States, died nt his
home In Bed Bank, N. J., recently, nged
82. Ho was fireman on tho "John Bull,'
the first locomottvo ever operated in this
country. The engine was sent from Eng
land In 1S30, and given its first trial near
Bordentuwn,
It Is said that General Sir nedvers
Buller carried with him to South Africa
0(r the British flag that was hoisted nt Pre
toria in 1551. Aiioincr urmsn nag me
one that was hauled down after Maju-
ba Is burled In Pretoria beneath a tomb
stone on which is inscribed tho single
woilt "llcsursam."
Mnry Ellen I.enso Is delivering a
course of lectures In Indianapolis. Her
spiritualistic tendencies are more than
ever pronounced, and she declares that
"the tlmo la near at hand when every
phenomenon of Spiritualism will be scien
tifically demonstrated, leaving nothing
for faith to Biipply."
The engagement Is announced of Miss
ltuth Moore, daughter of tho late John
O. Moore, of the banking house of Moore
& Schley, Now York, to U uteiuint Col
onel Lee, military attache of tho British
embassy nt Washington. Colonel Leo
represented his government In observing
tho Santiago campaign.
Sir Alfred Mlliier, governor of Cape
Colony, one of the most talkcd-about
men in Europe today, has won his way
to his present post by persistent hard
work. He scrcd In tho flnanco etcpart
ment at home and In Egypt under Mr.
Gosclien nnd Lord Cromor. Ho made
budgets under Sir William Hnrcourt nnd
Sir Michael Hicks-Bench. Then came bis
appointment to South Africa, In which
he has won his chief fame.
For
Presents
o m c
The largest aud finest As
sorlmeut o(
S!
FINLEY-
Prices ranging from $1.00
to $100.00.
MJEECEMAU & CTEli
130 Wyoming Avenue.
It seems singular that our country,
which is almost entirely free from tho
terrors of the earthquake, should have
pioduced the method of building that
piomlses to be of most service In coun
tries not happily so fiee from tremors
of tho earth. The steel constiuctlon of
our sky-scrapers is to be used for fc
palace for the mikado, and It Is ex
pected to do away with the objections
that have hitherto existed against
large buildings in countries visited by
earthquakes. The steel buildings will
sway and yield, but they will not tum
ble down. Tho plastering may crack,
but the man up In the sixteenth story
may look calmly out of his window
during a quake and experience nothing
more uncomfortable than a slight at
tack of seasickness.
Tho Compliment Was Lost.
When President McKinley was gov
ernor of Ohio, during the first term, he
and his wife, who was then more an
invalid than she Is now, lived at tho
Hotel Chittenden at Columbus, relates
tho Indianapolis Journal. The gover
nor was px-officlo trustee of the vari
ous state Institutions, and made semi
annual calls. Each time his visit was
scheduled at any of the Institutions,
the Inmates would make elaborate
preparations, ns would the officials In
charge, to make the governor's visit a
pleasant one. During a visit to the
Deaf and Dumb institute one evening,
the governor watched with delight the
movements of the mutes who "recltetl"
by graceful Blgns and gestures. The
governor became so Interested that
nfter one of the young ladles had
"signed" tho Lord's prayer and took
her place near the governor, he ex
tended hla hand and unconsciously
said:
"I am sure your recitation was very
beautiful," but the pretty compliment
was lost.
Tho terrible slaughter of men In the
Soutli Aft lean war gives a startling
lllustiatlon of the effectiveness of mod
el 11 implements of war in the hands of
skilled men. In the engagement be
tween Spanish and Americans and In
the Philippines the storming forces In
front of tho unskilled, though well
aimed, hotdes had little to fear as
compaied with the Englishmen In Af
rl"a when engaged In the endeavor
to capture a stronghold defended by
tho cool anel resolute sharpshooters of
Joubert's nrmy.
1
Bethlehem has furnished an example
worthy ot Imitation, by compelling
tramps to break stone on the streets to
pay for their food and lodging. At this
time there are few tramps who are
not following their profession from
choice. It is easy to see, therefore,
that the prospect ot work will tld a
community of tho tramp nuls-ince
quicker than any other icincdy that
can be suggested.
The fact that General Joe Wheeler
has announced that he will return and
take his seat in congress may l taken
as evidence that In his opinion theru
will boon be but little left for the amiy
to do In the Philippines.
JOLLY CAPTAIN LEAHY.
Dairying in Dakota.
-RE DAKOTA llutonlte has
hern Interviewing a local
faimer with interesting re
sults. The slue of the farm,
unfortunately, Is not mated, but the
returns for the crop of lSti9 are most
encouraging. This particular farmer
had 7C0 bushels of potatoes, which he
was selling nt 35 nnd 40 cents, aggre
gating $21.'. S00 bushels of wheat, at Dl
cents, $418; milk sold nt cheese fac
tory, $475; wool from herd of sheep,
$210, making a total of $1 3 is, besides
the Increase from eattlo and sheep,
which amounts to at least $"00. Tho
grand total of $1,043, besides tho pio
duett) used In supporting himself and
his family, the Dakota paper says,
can be duplicated by every farmer In
that country who farms Intelligently.
It Is not strange that tho farmers of
South Dikota nnd of the wholo west
nre prosperous. The Sioux City Tri
bune, In commenting on this Item,
calls attention to tho fact that tho
dairy produuts were the most profitable)
of all. This farmer's cows brought
him mo;n gross Income and nut profit
From the Boston Transcript.
It tr.ny seem a far cry from the rais
ing of chickens to statesmanship, hut
t'uptuln Illchurd P. Leury, the governor
of Guam, has combined them. When this
energetic, Jolly lilhli riaal olllcer went
to thu I.adrones, ho had no preconceived
notions as to how colonics should be gov
erned. But he was hern in Murjlund,
nnd has an American lovo for puhh, Ha
Is tho fame Captain Leaiy who In lSsS
plnctd the little warship Adams between
the guns of a German cruiser nnd the
nathes of Samoa nt Apia. Captain
I.tnry is apparently as capable a patri
archal ruler of simple people as he was
In dealing with highly civilized people In
a strulntd situation. Tho tasks are great
before him, but If all tho civil governors
nii'ot tho situations which urli?e else
where ns has Governor I.eary, of Guam,
a load will be lifted from tho shoulders
of tho administration.
White's Highest Compliment.
William Allen White, the author,
contrary to general belief, finds It
more profitable to devote his time to
his Kansas newspaper than to fiction.
While he is 11 Republican and hs been
offered political offices, among which
was the Emporia postoffice, wh'ch Is
worth $3,000 a year, he Is a stickler for
local reforms, and be hai steadfastly
declined to receive nny money that he
does not earn, relatei the Saturday
F.venlng Post. He oavs that the high
est compliment that ever was paid to
him was by an Emvo.ii hack driver
who drove an eastern visitor from the
station to the editor's house.
"How does Mr. White stand In Em
poria?" "Oh, he's all light, I guess. But he's
trying to make this town too Infernal
ly good to live in."
The Text Was All Bight.
A certain young minister was as
young ministers are apt to do very
conceited about his preaching; and
when visiting strange congregations he
did not scruple to fish for compliments
In the most unblushing manner, relates
the Scottish American. On one such
occasion he was invited to take dinner
with a douce old elder as reticent as
they make them. Manipulate the con
veisatlon as he would, our young
friend could not get his host to say
"sermon," and at last he boldly intro
duced the important subject by re
marking directly: "That was a fine
text I had today." But the elder
knew his man. "Ou, ay, there's rain
ing wrang wi' the text!"
Not His Fault.
A characteristic stcry Is being toll
ot Sir Hodvers Buller, says tho New
York Press, As everybody knows, hj
has been kept much on foreign service.
On returning to England on one occa
sion after having especially distin
guished himself, an auciienco with the
queen was gt anted to him. Ho was
received graciously by her majesty,
who remarked: "I am sorry, Sir l!ed
vers, that I havo not seen more of
you." The blunt soldier replied:
"That's not my fault, ma'am." Sir
Redvcrs got home duty for a while
after that.
PROSPERITY ADMITTED.
From tba L'tlca Press.
Wo are informed by a Democratic
newspaper, which does not believe In the
McKinley administration, that when
Garret A. Hoburt becimie vice president
ho was worth $3,000,000. The paper goes
on to bay that stneo JS9C "a resumption of
general prosperity" has advanced values,
so that Mi. Hohort was worth $5,000,JW)
whfii he died, The administration ot
McKinley und Holmrt, according to our
Democratic) authority, rr.i.st have started
in at once to put the country on a good
footing
Over the edge of tho purple down,
Ere tho tender drentns begin;
Look we mav not enter In,
Outcasts nil, from her gunrded wall,
Back to our watch wo creep;
But we pity u! ah! pity ti3l
We wakeful: oh! pity us!
We must go back with Policeman Pay
Back from tho City of Sleep.
Itudyard Kipling.
Kiss nnd Make It Well.
I sit nt my window nnd sew and dream,
Whllo my little boy nt play
Beguiles my thoughts fom hem and seam
As he frolics the llvelcng day:
But time and again ho comes to me
With a sorrowful tale to tell.
And mother must look at the scratch or
bump,
Then kiss it and make It well.
So I kiss his hoad, and his knee, and his
arm,
And tho dear little grimy hand:
And who can fathom the mnglc charm,
And who can understand?
For I even klhs when he bites his tongue
And love works Its mystic spell,
For there's never a cut, nor a scratch,
nor a bump.
But mother can kiss it well.
Tls a foolish whim, do you say? Ah, yes!
But tho foolish things of earth
Have taught the wle, since a little child
In Bethlehem had his birth.
And we know that many an older heart
We know, but we do not tell
Will never bo free from its bitter smart
Till kisses have made it well.
May Ellis Nichols, In Woman's Home
Companion.
Manana.
Manana, when the red sun leaps
A ruddy disk from level teas,
A wind shall waft across the deeps
From other lands and climes than
these,
A scent of spicy tropic tree,
An lncer.se on the air swung free,
And by the gates the palo dawn keeps
My ono lone ship will come to me.
I grant to others place and gold.
I yield tho myrtle-clasp of fame;
Whatever else that life may hold.
Be sure my heart shall never claim,
If that ono largess I may name.
That when tomorrow lights the sea,
Llko some lost sheep strayed far afold
My ono lono ship will come to me.
Beyond the shore-line's whispering sands,
And to tho thin horizon-rim,
I stretch in silence empty hands,
And watch with eyes not yet grown
dim;
I listen to tho solemn hymn,
Tho low waves chant in liquid key,
Manana so the watchword stands
My ono lono ship will come to me.
O envious dawn! arise at last
And bweep the hearth of coming day;
My fancy sees tho first tall mast
And foam-wako stretching down the
bay:
Already now tho east Is gray,
A far sail whitens off the lee;
Yea! thus all doubts and dangers passed,
My one lono ship will come to me.
Ernest McGaffey In Woman's Home
Companion.
Man Was Made First.
An anti-man convention
Was called to order, and
Many women fussed nbcut.
Each stiivlng to command.
Thu president all neivously
Gave out In tones severo:
"This is a women's meeting '
Wo want no bosses here!"'
Tho doings wero peculiarly
Offenslvo to the "lords,"
And If a man had ventured In
He'd cause some sure dlbcord
Ono woman read a paper:
"No Dullard Man for Me!"
Another styled her lecture:
"Man's Imbecility."
LITERARY NOTE.
"Tho Founder of Christian Science" is
the title of an Interesting article In the
November number of tho New England
Magazine, by Henrietta H. Williams, de
scriptive of Mary Baker Eddv, discoverer
nnd founder of Christian Science. Mrs.
Williams has evidently been fnlthful In
gleaning tho facts in regard to tho lifo
of Mrs. Eddy, for she relates some Inci
dents never beforo published, of tho
homo life of the now famous woman.
The article Is illustrated with twenty-five
half-tone engravings.
THE MODknM IlAUDWARH HtOrtS.
Open
Grates
December
5al
V
of
Ladies9,
Mee's
Do you have thein in
your house?
Perhaps you need new
Audiroua or a Fire Set.
We have them from
$.oo. up.
FOOTE & SMEAR Ca
119N. Washington Ave.
-
Every Ono to His Trade.
Tho recent death of Mme. Aubernon
do Nervllle In Paris recalls a reply
once made to her by Dumas rlls, who
did not enjoy a certain kind of llonU
lug, relates tho Chicago News. At a
dinner at Mme. Aul.ernon's one even
ing he sat next to 0 certain gener.il,
who was disconcerted by Dumas' chilly
manner.
'Why do you not tell the general
some of your witty stories?" asked tho
hostets, In a whisper.
"Mon Dleu, Madame." replied Du
mas, In his most Ingenious way,
"everyone to his trade-1 was wnltlns
for him to fire oft a cannon'"
The Englishman's Version.
Hero Is a Joke which comes fresh
from the Erin, Sir Thomas Llpton's
yacht. Names wero given to the
writer, but they nre suppressed for ob
vious reasons, relates the Philadelphia
Call.
Ornamental Floors, such as we
oiTer have been in use in Europe
for generations. They are no ex
periment,
It is safe to consider that no out
lay will so furnish and enrich a
dwelling as these ornamental floors.
They are cheaper than carpets.
Floors laid and finished in best
manner.
Fine line of patterns to select
from.
Estimates furnished and all work
guaranteed.
Hill & Connell
121 N. "Waahinffton Ave,
Scranton, Pa.
Heating
Stoves,
Ranges,
FmnnniaceSo
Plmmbleg
and
Timing.
The HMnt &
Connell Co0
Children's
Wool
Underwear
Opens
Todajo
510and512
LACKAWANNA AVENU&
Heating, Plumbing,
Gas Fitting, Electric
Light Wiring, Gas
an Electric Fixtures,
Builders Hardware.
04 tactoaiM Aveane
LMther Keller
LIHE, CEMENT,
SEWER PIPE, Etc.
Vard and Oftloa
West Lackavvanna Ave.,
SCRANTON, PA.
is Youn
HOUSK VACANT?
IF SO,
TRY A 'TOIl RHNT" AD.
in Tin: TRinrNB.
ONE CENT A WORD.
TIME SAVED IS MONEY EARNED
Someming Hew.
wimp m
Y V iizi 1L
AM We lave It.
Pen Carbon
Letter Book
No Press.
No Water.
No Work.
No Time.
Any Ink.
Any Paper.
Any Pen.1
A Perfect Copy.
Reynolds Bros
Office1 Supplies Our Specialty.
339 Wyoming Ave
HOTKl, JKRMYN.
And In the loni; discussion
That followed In thnt room,
Woman was styled "Tho perfect one!
"Flower of earliest bluoral"
Rut. lo! a voice demunlnr,
Spoke of n perfect plan
And said: "When earth created was,
Tho tlrst ono made was mnn!"
And then, a wild commotion
Mude Unit convention burst
The orr,m could not htand tl.e thought
That man was fashlored first!
Buffalo News,
PERSONALITIES.
Thomas Arnold, second son of Dr Ar
nolil, of Rucby, bus Just completed a
volume of remlnlncences of his father.
Captain Sir ndwurd Chichester, the
EnKltsh commander who was friendly to
Dewey at Manila, is now transfer olllcer
at Cupo Town.
Miss Ora A. Root, of Cincinnati, epcntls
her spared tlmo collecting books and
readlnK matter to send to the soldiers In
the Philippines.
Tho Iinurbon Duko of Pnrmn, who was
forced out of Ills duchy in 1S53, tins nine
teen children, tho larecst family of any
of the royalty In Rurnpo.
GUNSIiER & FORSYTH,
S2S-3CT PENN AVENUE.
HENRY BELIN, JR.,
Ueuerul Agent for ttat WyouUai
ULtrtcWJ.-
iiroirs
POliER.
" 1 01 we roynuy 111 j.ui(iH'.
A younu woman on the Erin while I Mrs. Kmmotia Dlulno objects very mirh
Ulnlne, lUnK,8portlnr. rtmaUemi
null tbo Hepauno UtmmlM.
CoaipAuyM
HIGH EXPLOSIVES.
tmety me. Cup and K.iilo4tt
lloom 101 Connell riuUdlnf.
ttoraotio.
AOKNOmi
THOS. FORD, - Plttston.
JOHN II. SMITH & SON, - Plymouth.
W. V. MULLIGAN, - WllkwUane.
I nm wllllriit that you dm iuv rarae tn Indorse nipans Tabnlci. I have " rorprllea
tlonotillMJuwi," mostly due to kidney twable, und I find they relieve that nwful feeling of
oppression nrouud niyboart whenever I eat a trilld more vuan 1 should, or am very tired.
Tnej nre eood every way. My foil took u ixxketful loCiiup Muck with hlro. I uae given
them to noiKriborsanfferfnir from uruta Indigestion and thoy are Kood nnd dp more- than i
rliimrd for them. Mr pardener asked ine yesterday for another ouu of those "Itlparian
Tauools." You ee that I am a niiiulonary. Plmso tend mo tome, and 1 thall send half to
iiiiw rtrlu ivwVflcontllnlnr TIN Rlriss Tum In a mt Mtlon (without kIuu) It now for ml. .Horn.
tnx UuTf-ron FUR I r Thin low niKvrt ort l IiiINkIhI Tnr lh iur .oil lh economical Onodoj.r
It tCUr.iH cariiiu. il tAbniM) rn Iw hiul hy mall by wuiliiiir rorly-rliriitrnu lotke turttiCiiriiiciij
rriKY. No 10 ipnice Sirm. riff Yorl-or a ilnil. mrton (It hhuii will 1 ni fornvjrnl. lutiws
fmxa istr M t hd ot Kieion, gtutnU itvitkentrr, uexi ccati mil at Uiuor Men and barker tUt,
k