f
i J raff i
, HENRY A. PARSONS, Jr., Editor and Publisher. NILi DESPERANDUM. Two Dollars per Annum.
VOL. XII. RIDGWAY, ELK TOUNTY, PA., THTJllSDAY, APEIL 13. 1882 NO. 8.
The Silver Lining'.
There's never a day bo sunny
But a little cloiul appears t
There's never a life so happy
But has its timo of tears ;
'et the sun shines out the brigbtor
tVlicuover tho tompest clears.
There's rievor a garden growing
With rcmes in every plot (
There's never a htart so harileed
But it has one tender spot :
We have only to pruno tho border
To find tho forget-me-not.
There's never a sun that rises
But we know 'twill sot at night J
The tii;ls that gleam in the morning
At evening ere just as bright ;
And tlia hour that is the sweetest
Is betweon tho dark and light.
There's novcr a dream so happy
But tho waking makes us sad ;
Thero's never a dioam of sorrow
But tho waking makes ns glad ;
We shall look some day with wonder
At the "troubles" we have had.
THAT GREEN SILK.
Mrs. Deacon Lewis and Mrs. Davi3,
the postmistress, were conferring to
gether in mysterious whispers as they
leaned over their mutual back-yard
fen?b. Said Mrs. Deacon Lewis :
'Seoin' is bclioTin or else I should
say jest ns you do, that it, couldn't be
truo; but I ji'tt stepped into Miss
Badger's to see what she'd ch arge to fix
over my black alpaca I wa'n't in any
hurry for the alpaca, but I kind of got
an idea that there was fomethin' in the
wind and I thought meb be Icould find
out what it was there and there I saw
it with my own two eyes, all over plait
ia's and ru film's that itsecmedabarnin'
Bhame to cat up good thick silk into,
and fixed up in the back so't I couldn't
have tho heart to set down on it. And
Miss Badger, for all she's so close
mouthed, she up and told me who it
belonged to, and savs I, 'You don't say
so I' and enys sho, 'Yes, I do,' and then
she pursed her lips up kind of pro
vokin', as if she could tell a great deal
more if she was a mind to. But I've
got wit enough to put two and two to
gether, if foils s is clo?e-raonthed, and
pays j, right out for there ain't nothin'
nly ubv.t me--says I, 'Then Cordilly
Brew ter is u-poin' to get married.' And
Mias B.idjuer nhe never ebsnied it."
" Wull. it. dues beat all," said Mrs.
Daviw. "TbiH las been a sing'lar year,
wh it with ihecruet and tho terrible
liapppuin's all round; and now Cordilly
Brewbter sett in' up to have a green silk
dress, w hen he 1 asn't worn anything
but borubnz;rie and alpaca and her one
old black si k fur v.'p upon twenty
years. It's t-nousrh t.i u.iset anybody's
ideas altogether, and make 'em thick
tuo wo)ld's er;ruii) to en cd. Though
I can't, v hatsnch ixtaganee looks
much like tl-emi Ionium. "
M s 1). m-nti Lttnia hUuck her head in
nolemn censure.
' A good black f ilk would hive been
much more siiitiiblo aud becouiiu' to a
woman most forty years old, to say
notliii.' of the vpnr m d tlm makin' over,
and for a minister's wife "
" You clou't s iy tlint she's goin' to
mavry the ruinLterl" exclaimed Mrs.
Davis.
" Why, I suppose so, of convse. Who
can it ba if it isn't the ruinistei?''
I never saw any sign of their
keepin' company. Parson Greeley is
too speritual to marry a woman that
crimps Ler front hair with hot slate
pencils; and the rover put more than
three eggs into those custards that she
carried to the donation party. I should
think more likely 'twas somebody that
ahe pictiednp when she was down to
Haverhill visitin', or John Parmenter,
that usrd to keep corcpany with her
when ihcy was joun, u-l l:ai J-ind o'
becu doiu' it, cfl nod on, ever senco."
Oil, sho wonldu't have J hn Par
menter, even if he hid spunk enough
to ask her, whi''h ho hain't. He is a
good fellow, Join in, but he'll never set
tho world atira, t:nd he's been runniu'
down hill terribly lately; has had to
mortfnpe his farm, they do say."
'CordiUy's monoy would come in
just right, then; but, as you say, I don't
euppeso sho would have him. It's likely
that's what's made John turn out so
poorly, Ler not haviu' him. But I can't
really believe it's the minister. There's
Sammy; let's ask him."
Sammy Greeley, the minister's young
est hopeful, who was engaged in " shin
ning up" a neighboring telegraph pole
with the ambitious design of attaching
his lite to the wire, descended some
what reluctantly to the earth and
obeyed Mrs. Diviu' beckoning finger.
Sammy was a freckled-faced urchin
with a turned-up nose, the expression
of which was contradicted by a pair of
preternatnially solemn and innocent
looking blue eyes. In spite of his eyes
Sammy was generally regarded as a
"limb," and he and his three brothers,
Moses, Hosea and Joseph, caused the
old proverb concerning ministers' sons
to be often repeated with somnle head
shakings by the townspeople.
" Simmy, is your father goin' to be
married ?"'asked Mrs. Davis, with her
hand affectionately placed on Sammy's
shoulder.
" The old gent? He couldn't remem
ber to. Nobcdy would have him,
either. He's ns bald as a door-knob,
aud ho asks a blessin' anywhere along
between the meat and the puddin'. And
Joo and me would fix her, anyhow."
" Wouldn't you like to have him
marry a nice, kind lady like Miss Cor
dilly Brewster? She would teach you
how to behave "
" Enow how good enough sow, and
I'd wriag her old parrot's neck I I don't
believe it, anyhow, but I'm goin' to find
out."
And off went Sammy, regardless of
his kite, and buret, breathless, into his
father's study.
'You ain't goin' to marry Miss
Brewster and her old greea parrot that
swears, and have her always clearin' up
and dustin' and losin your papers, are
yer?" demanded Sammy.
The minister turned from his sermon
wriling and regarded Sammy with mild
amazoment. Gradually his expression
changed to one of perplexity. He re
moved his spectacles from his eyes to
the top of his head and then he tapped
his forehead with the tips of his fin
gers, as if to summon forth some stray
ing r, collection.
" That must be the very thing I was
trying to remember! Wait a moment.
I must have set it down somewhere."
And Parson Greeley drew from one of
the pigeon holes of his desk some loose
sheets of foolscap paper which had evi
dently been used as a diary. Several
pages were devoted to memoranda;
there the minister read aloud:
"" Mem. To confute tho infidel ped
dler's argument by St. Paul, and
"'Mem. To tell Deborah, mildly
but firmly, that so much saleratus is
not conducive to health.
" Mem. To punish Joseph and
Samuel for unseemly oonduct at prayer
time.
" Mem . To admonishBrotherBatos
(gently) that he is becoming unsound
in doctrine.
" Mem. To endeavor so far as lies
in me to restore peace to the singing
seats,
'"Mem. To endeavor to exercise
such a measure of wholesome restraint
over Moses and Samuel that they may
not become a cause of scandal to the
neighborhood.
" ' Mem. To devote a greater meas
ure of attention to worldly matters,
such as applying blacking to my boots,
and brushing my raiment.
"'Mem. To consider prayerfully
whether the use of hair-dye is incom
patible with tho principl es of the Christ
ian religion or the duties of the Christ
ian ministry.
"'Mem. That the singing r eats are
in the hands of God, and that He causes
even the wiath of man to praise Him.
" ' Mem. To consider prayerfully
the subject of contracting a matrimo
nial alliance with Miss Cordelia Brow
Bter.' " That's it 1 I knew I was not mis
taken ; and I felt that I had leadings
from the Lord in that direction ; aud
yet, in the xuidet of manifold cares and
distractions, it wholly slipped my mind,
weak and erring mortal that I am.
But it may not yet be too late." And
the minister seized his hat, giving it a
husty bmsh with his sleeve, and hur
ried to the door, turning, however, to
lay his hand with unwonted tenderness
upon his son's head, saying, solemnly:
"3amuel, 1 thank yon for this sugges
tion, and I would that I could perceive
in you as lively signs of tho workings
of grace as I do of wisdom and discern
ment beyond your years."
Samuel, left alone, looked after his
father with a most lugubrious face.
" For a feller to go and do it himself,
that's the worst of it I I hadn't better
let on to Mose and the rest that I did
it I No moro fun if she comes litre;
she'll want a feller not to tear his
clothes and have his hair brushed
every minute, and no pie or cake be
tween meals. We'll make it lively for
her, though Mose and Hoso and Jo
and I."
All r.nconscious of what w.is in store
for her Miss Cordelia Brewster was en
gaged in inspecting and admiring her
green silk dress, which had ju st been
sent home fiom the dressmaker's. Miss
Cordelia was a plump little woman,
with a pinkish bloom still lingering
upon her cheeks, and no trace of time's
frosting upon her chestnut locks. Why
site had never married was a mystery.
For ten years after her father, the vil
lage doctor, had dUd, leaving her a
modest competence, the gossips had
been on tho lookout for signs of matri
monial intentions on her purt. When
she had passed thirty and was still Miss
Cordelia, people gradually ceased to
speoulate about her. For some inscrut
able reason they decided that Miss Cor
delia meant to be an old maid to the end
of the chapter. It was observed that even
John Parmenter, who had somewhat
indeSnitely "hung round" her for
years, "kind o' dropped oil';" ho no
longer 6at in the singing seats, where
Miss Cord alia still serenely kept her
p'.aco, despite the rivalry of younger
choristors ; so they were not so fre
quently thrown together, und he was
seldom seen to waik home with her
from tho weekly prayer-meeting ; his
old sorrel maro was very rarely seen
fastened to the hitching-post before
Miss Cordelia's door of a Sunday night;
and only once or twice had he been
seen shyly to offer her a nosegay of
southernwood and cinnamon pinks,
which grew to great perfection in his
garden, and of which, in her girlhood,
Miss Cordelia had been very fond.
Many other admirers had Miss Cor
delia, but she had turned a cold shoul
der upon all, and seemed perfectly con
tented to live on in her comfortable old
house, with trim box-bordered flower
beds in the front yard, and lilac bushes
crowding in at the windows, with her
handmaiden Tryphosa, who was not,
as her name suggested, a blooming and
romantio young maiden, but an ancient
ana angular spinster, wno believed in
signs and omens, and always "felt"
coming events "in her bones." Try
phosa was now gazing at the green silk
wit a a melancholy expression of coun
tenance.
"Green means forsaken; there ain't
no denyin' it. And Seliny Wilson, that
was merried in green, was laid out a
corps e in it before the end of the year;
and Mertildy Lyman, that was merried
in a white muslin sprigged with green,
and green bunnit strings, she had a
drunken husband that fell off the hay
mow and dislocated his spinal column,
and everybody knew her twins wa'n't
bright; and"
" But I am not going to be married in
it, you know, Tryphosa," said Miss Cor
delia, turning a merry face up to Miss
Try pbosa's doleful one. Perhaps it is
only unlucky as a wedding dress. As
for being forsaken, there doesn't seem
to be anybody left to forsake me but
you, and I am' not afraid that all the
green dresses in the world could mako
you do that."
"There ain't no luck about green
nohow," said Tryphosa. "K 'twas lay.
look, now, or a handsome brown "
" I suppose I really ought to have
had black," said Miss Cordelia, medita
tively; " but some way the spring com
ing on, with everything so fresh and
bright, made me feel as I used to long
ago, and I've made believe to myself
I wouldn't own it to anybody but you,
Cryphosp but I've made believe I was
a girl again. And that's why I had this
green silk."
"And that's why you'vo been putting
posies in your hair. Well, it beats all
what a difference there is in folks. Now
spring puts me in mind of houso
clcanin' and soap-bilin' and bitters
Land sakes I if there ain't Parson Gree
ley a-comin' up the walk, and nothin'
but the old cropple crown for dinner,
and all skin and bones at that, and he
a-comin' in the yard this blessed min
ute!" Miss Cordelia whisked the groon silk
out of sight, and smoothed her crimps
demurely down, as she hastened to
greet her visitor.
It happened that Miss Polly Watkins,
who went abont the village peddling a
concoction known as Watkins' Unap
proachable Liniment, was so fortunate
as to be passing just as tho minister
opened Miss Cordelia's front yard gate.
" There I I knew well that there
wa'n't never so much smoke without
some fire. Miss Badger needn't think
she could make me believe that green
silk gown with a train didn't mean
something. So it's the minister. Well,
men-folks is terrible short-sighted Me
ters. There is them in Westfield that
would make him a good sensible wife ''
Miss Polly was eo unhappy as to go
on for nearly a quarter of a mile before
she met anybody to whom she could
tell her news, and then it was only Dr.
Ramsay, jogging along behind his old
white horse, and between him and Miss
Polly " there wa'n't," as she expressed
it, " no great likin', no more'n there was
apt to be between two of a trade." But
still news was news, and Miss Polly
could not resist the temptation of an
opportunity to share it.
"Well, things do turn out queer I"
said the doctor to himself, meditatively
flicking a fiy off his old white horse as
he jogged along again. "I wouldn't
have thought she would have had any
body, let alone the old parson. If I had
thought Why, I'm ten years young
er'n he is and a sight better calculated
to please the fair sex. And that's a
snug bit of property of Miss Cordilly's,
and she's a wholesome-looking, good
tempered woman, to say nothing of be
ing handsome, which don't signify. I
believe I can cut out the parson if I
try. I always said I would die a bach
elor, but it'd a wise man that changes
his mind."
And the doctor actually whipped Lis
hcrso ut of his accustomed jog into a
lively trot, and everybody ran to the
window, for the doctor in a hurry was
a sight that the oldest inhabitant had
never seen.
In the meantime Misa Polly had met
Abner Phillips, one of the "black folks,"
who lived three miles from the village.
But Abner could not have been more
interested in Miss Polly's news if he
had lived next door to the possessor of
tho green silk.
His homeward way led him past John
Parmrnter's house, and John was hoe
ing in his garden.
"Wa'al, now, Parson Greeley i3 goin'
to do a pretty good thing for himself,
ain't ho?' drawled Abner, after the
usual comments and inquiries c -incoming
crops had been exchanged. "11
knows which sido his bread is buttered
on. Parsons ginerally doo3."
" What is he going to do ?" inquired
John Parmenter.
"You don't mean to say you hain't
hoard? Wa'al, I declare, you don't
know what's goin on so well as black
folks doos t Ho's agoin' to marry Miss
Cordilly Brewster. Ho's turriblo tejus,
tho old purson is, and she'll have to
step around lively to fetch up them
boys. Bat women-folks always doos set
by a minister."
After Abner had gone John Par
menter dropped his hoe and stood
wiping his forehead with hU handker
chief with a bewilJered look.
"I don'c know why I shouldn't have
expected she'd marry, but somehow I
didn't. I never thought of such a thing.
I don't know why I should feel so about
it. If I hadn't the courage to ask her
when I was young and prosperous surely
I couldn't now. I always began to be a
coward the minute I came in sight of
her. I never felt so before any other
woman; but then I never cared any
thing about any other. Anyway, I can't
rest until I find out whether its true or
not. Cordelia can't object to telling an
old friend. Madame Humor rules this
village, and sho's very apt to be mis
taken." So John set out to call on Miss Cor
delia. As he passed the bed of cinna
mon pinks he found that, although it
was early in the season, three had blos
somed that very morning, and ho made
them into . a little nosegay with some
sprays of fragrant southernwood. And
he was in such haste that he forgot to
conceal them from the public gaze by a
bit of paper, as feeling that it was
somewhat ridiculous for a stout old
bachelor of forty-five to be carrying
about little bouquets he had done on
other occasions.
The doctor was driving away from
Miss Cordelia's door as John approached
it, the horse going at his old-fashioned
jog, as if there wero nothing in the
world that was worth hurrying for.
"I hope she isn't ill I" thought
John, and then a sudden suspicion
seized him. Here might be another
rival, and a more formidable one than
Parson Greeley. Were rivals spring
ing up around him like mush
rooms, when he had never thought of
the possibility of the existence of one ?
Mits Cordelia's cheeks were much
flushed, and they grew reelder still at
sight of John's nosegay,
JoTln, strange to say," did tot blush
or stammer us he presented it. Rivals
seemed to be a wonderful stimulus to
his courage.
"Uoraolia, I heard that you were
going to marry Parson Greeley. It
isn t truf", is it ?"
There was something in the tone of
nis voioe that made Miss Cordelia start.
Was John going to speak, after being
dumb so long?
"No, it isn't true," said Cordelia,
and oast down her eyes. "
"Nor nor anybody else?" John
was stammering now. Was his courage
going to fail?
" Ho, nor anyuociy ciso," said Miss
Cordelia. ' That is"
Trvrhosft. coming into the kitchen
from the back yard at that moment,
saw a sight which caused her to drop
tho cropple crowned roostor, but just
deceased, into nor pan oi dcugii.
"Elviry Kimball needn't have
knocked mo up at 5 o'clock this
mornin' to inquire if that green silk
dress had a train. I should think it
did havo a train I" said Tryphosa,
grimly. liazar.
Electric Tower.
Among tho serious obstacles that
encounter the plan of securing illumina
tion on a grand scale by means of pow
erful electric lamps raised on lofty
towers, are the expense and difficulty of
erecting fcuch towers, and the awkward
ness of tho machinery required to lower
the lamps for trimming and returning
them to their lofty position. To do
away with the latter diiliculty entirely
and to materially lesson the former are
the objects of a light tower invented by
William Golding, of New Orleans, of
which tho Scientific American furnishes
an illustrated description:
Mr. Golding dwpenses with stagings
and the usual machinery of tower build
ings, and raises his tower into the air
by additions made at the bottom. The
tower is a cast-iron cylinder, built up
of short sections, and kept vertical
while iu process of erection and after
ward by means of guys. The top sections
to which the lamps are to be perma
nently attached, are put together first,
and by means of an ordinary derrick
are set vertically over a hydraulic press
placed upon the intended foundation of
the tower. Hat hydraulic lift raises
the top section until a new section, say,
nve feet long, can be set underneath.
While the lift is returning to ad
mit a new section, the raised tower
is held in position by a clamp and
kept vertical by means of the guys.
When tho new section has been
securely bolted on the whole is lifted
another length; and thus by successive
lifts and additions at the bottom the
tower is raised until the required alti
tude is attained. Each section of tho
tower will be bored out before it is put
in place, and have a diameter sufficient
to allow the easy passage of a circular
platform carrying the lamp trimmer,
who will be lifted to the top of the
tower by means of a piston operated by
compressed air supplied by pumps or a
rotary blower. The inventor thinks
that tho pressure need never exceed
half a pound to the square inch. The
cost of a GOO feet tower complete (with
out the lamps) raised in the w.iy de
scribed is eetirc-.ted at about $30,000.
The project of erecting such a tower
for the purpose cf illuminating the
crescent-shaped water front of New
Orleans is beine agitated.
Indians' first Stent of the Ocean.
Tha Zuui chiefs were driven to the
New York Mutual buildirig tn Milk
street, and from the summit of tho
marble tower, which is 185 fret from
the ground, they caught their first
glimpso of (he ocean. On en. erring
trom the tower upon the bulconv which
surrounds it .Mr. Gushing pointed out
iLtothebay, end informc-rt the chiefs
that the ocean was out there. Amid
many exclamations of delight, they re
peated, verjf many times: " Show a hat"
which Mr. Cnshirig states is a superla
tive term, indicating tho most pro
found veneration and surprise.
At first they seemed a little dazed,
but as soon as they realized that they
were at length in the presence of the
much-longert-fcr "ocean of sunrise,"
they all fell simultaneously to repeat
ing, in a sing-song undertone, certain
prayers. These lasted several minute?,
and during their continuance they threw
to the wiud-j hnndfnlsof ' prayer Hour;
they had br. light with them a mixture
of line sea f hells and white corn llour.
Having completed their dcvotioun, the
chiefs commenced to expatiate upon
what thev saw around ttietvj, particular
ly upon tho tremendous extent of the
pueblo of Boston.
Pointing to tho line of.the horizon of
the bay, tlie cuiei oi the llvo said
" That is tho black blue of the ocean,
and that is the foam thrown up when it
is angvy. We have waited for many
generations to see this which our fathers
have told us of. Wo now see it. Pass
ing wonderful ore tho things we see
here. On one side the ocean, and on
the other a world of houses. The whole
world is filled with different tribes of
men." Boston Post.
SCIENHFIC XOTES.
Experience proves that less injury
comes to the eyes from the electrio than
from gas light.
Colonel Vcniukoff, a Russian traveler.
estimates that a third of Asia, as well as
a thirteenth . part of Europe, still re
mains to bo explored.
The milky sap of many plants con
tains caoutchouc, suspended in the form
of minute, transparent globules, these
being frequently as small as 1-20,000
to 1-50,000 of an inch iu diametor.
Dr. Wm. A. Hammond finds over
heated apartments to be a potent cause
of nervous irritability. If we would
preserve our amiability and our tran
quillity of mind we should live iu well
ventilated rooms kept at a temperature
Of about sixty-five degrees.
Of the sense of taste Professor Mo
Eendrick states that the base of the
tongue is most sensitive to bitters, and
the tip to sweots. A substance must be
soluble in the fluid of the mouth to
create taste, but no definite relation has
been found between tne chemical condi
tion of bodies and their taste.
Stars seen through the tail of a comet
seem to increase in brilliancy. The
French astronomer Ch. Andre explains
this by an hypothesis that the comets
are assemblages of bodies with solid
nuclei which reflect and multiply the
light, and suggests that the average
dimension of these nuclei can be deter
mined by studying the amount of
increase in the brilliancy of the stars
behind them.
LIFE AT THE WHITE HOUSE.
How Huslnessls fiomliii-lpd at lb Nation'!
Henilanarteri.
Wo find in the Washington Evening
Star the following interesting descrip
tion of how business is now condncted
at the White House: The White House
under the present administration is
truly a place of business, and is run on
thorough business principles. President
Aithurhas set apart certain days of the
week for special purposes, and all the
employes know that nothing can bo
allowed to inteifere with the regular
work for each day. One day in every
week the President has reserved for
himself. Few people can realize the
constant strain to which the President
subjected. It is absolutely neces
sary that he should have some relief
from the pressure which is brought to
bear upon him from morning until
midnight. President Garfield gave
himself day and night to the duties
cf his office, and tho constant strain
on his nerves and strength told upon
him very apparently even in the short
time that ho held the office. At first
Saturday was the day chosen by Presi
dent Arthur when ho should seclude
himself from the crowd of sight-seers
and business callers who daily besiege
the White House, but as that day is the
one when Senators and Representatives
are most at leisure to look after affairs
which necessitate a call upon the Presi
dent (both houses ot Congress usually
adjourning over that day), he decided
upon Monday as "his" day. Tuesdays
and Fridays have long been "cabinet "
days. Members of Congress, however,
are received on these days from 10 until
12 o'clock, The latter hour is the time
for the regular cabinet meeting.
Wednesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays
are what are known as business days,
when those who have business to lay
before the President, or who merely
wish to see him and shake him
by the hand are received
from 11 till 1 o'clock. The
President generally breakfasts about
7:30 o'clock, lunches at 2, if the pres
sure of business allows him, and dines
at 7:30 o'clock. About 4 o'clock he
goes out driving. During the evening
he almost always has a number of call
ers, either personal, friends or officials,
with whom he has appointments. When
the last caller has departed the Presi
dent usually devotes several hours to
matters which he has set aside to be
considered at this time, or which have
been crowded over during tho press of
the day. It is at this time a decision is
reached on many matters of weight, in
cluding frequently important appoint
ments. The rules which have been laid
down in the White House are not devi
ated from except in case of special ap
pointment. In fact, business is done
somewhat as it was under the Jackson
and Grant regimes. It will be
remembered that President Garfield's
private secretary, J. Stanley Brown,
acted in the same capacity for Presi
dent Arthur for a timo. Owing to the
request of Mrs. Garfield that ho should
take charge of and arrange certain pa
pers with a view to their use in the
biography of the late President he was
obliged to sever connection with the
White House. Fred J. Phillips, a per
sonal friend of President Arthur, suc
ceeded Mr. Brown. Although President
Arthur has a much smaller force of
assistants than his predecessors, the
work at the executive mansion is dis-
putehed with remarkable promptness
and accuracy. This is owing more,
perhaps, to the signal abilities of Mr.
riiillips than to anything else. He is
thorough man of business. Tho
President has implicit confidence in
him, and relies on him a great deal,
and consequently Mr. Phillips succeeds
in relieving him of much that would
otherwise occupy his time and annoy
him. The many callers whom he
is obliged to see are dis
posed of with rapidity and satisfaction.
I lie hnncrv ollioa-seeker is r,ot lured
by a falso hope, becmse of a disinclina
tion to say no, but he is told at onc9
whether there is any chance for him or
not. When he is told no he under
stands it to mean no. Mr. Phillips'
time is more than occupied. Ho is
rushed. He has no relief and no time
for recreation. No matter how busy,
he always has a pleasant word for those
who opproach him. He is not onlv
recognized as a thorough business man,
but a3 a thorough gentleman. Mr.
Crump is the steward of tho White
House. He came there with Hayes,
and rendered valuable assistance during
the late President's il tness. Mr. Crump
ond the new French cook make the
President's dinner parties.
The President s doorkeeper, Charles
Loeiller, knows every person of any
prominence. He never forgets a face.
He is daily passed by crowds of people
desirous of audience, but he knows
how to discriminate, aud his phleg-
matio temperament keeps him level
headed. He came with General Grant.
Arthur Simmons has been the door
keeper'of the private secretary's office
since 1866, and he is likely to remain
there for a good many years. Edgar
Beckley, doorkeeper of the reception-
room, came with ueneral Grant. There
are several messengers connected with
the office. The President s mounted
messengers, James Sheridan and Thos.
Dolan, are daily seen riding through
tne streets. Albert, tne driver, and
Jerry, the footman, must not be forgot
ten, 'iney were well Known under
General Grant's administration, when
they looked well behind a fine
team. They didn't seem to take
much pride in President Hayes's tnrn
out. It is very doubtful if President
Arthur, who has a turnout befitting a
President, will allow his driver to hold
tho reins in one hand and large
umbrella in the other, uhere is one
man about the White House authorized
to make arrests, Sergeant Dinsmore.
Two other policemen are on duty at
night. A police officer was first placed
on duty there in 1864. Very little of
Sergeant Dinsmore's time is ocoupied
with police duty, however. He and
the ushers, Messrs. Thomas F. Pendle,
who came with Lincoln, and J. T.
Riokard, have about as much as they
can attend to in receiving callers, and
showing what can be seen and answer
ing innumerable questions.
SUNDAY HEADING.
I'nylng Debts.
One of our religious exchanges Las
the following strong remarks on this
subject. They dmu the nail to the
head and clinch it : "Men niny so
phisticate how they please. They cm
never make it right, and all the iniqui
tous laws in tho universe cannot make
it right for them not to pay their debts.
There is a sin in this neglect ns clear
and as deserving church discipline r.s is
stealing or falso swearing, lie who
violates his promise to pay, or wilholds
the payment of a debt when it is in his
power to meet the obligation, ought
to feel that in the sight of all honest
men he is a swindler. Religion may be
a very comfortable cioaK under wnicu
to hide, but if religion does not make
a man deal justly, it is not worth
having."
Religions News mid Xolrs.
The Presbyterians in Minnesota num
ber 7.419.
The bishop-elect of Cuernanaca, the
Rev. Prudenzio G. Hernandez, of tho
Reformed Mexican church, is a pure-
blooded Indian.
The Rev. G. Hubert, a Baptist minis
ter in Norway, has been sentenced to
pay a heavy fine for having baptized a
young person, both of whose parents
were already members of the Baptist
church.
According to the Irish church direc
tory for the current year there are now
1,708 clergy in the Protestant Episcopal
cbnrch of Ireland. In the census of
1861 there was 2,265, and the decrease,
therefore, in the twenty years has been
550.
The will of the late Leonard Church,
of Hartford, is not to be contested,
Mrs. Church agreeing to pay the con
testants $25,000. The estate is valued
at $400,000. Two Congregational so
cieties and the American Tract society
will receive $4,000 eaoh.
The annual statistics of the Moravian
church in the United States show that
there are now 9,607 communicants, a
gain of 136; non-communicants over
thirteen years of age number 1,530,
and there are 5,307 children. During
the vear twenty-five were excluded and
943 " dropped."
Bishop Peterkin fays that, contrary to
the assertions of some, it is a very com
mon thing for ministers to decline
churches that are offered to them, with
much larger salaiies than they are re
ceiving, because they are unwilling to
give up a work in which they have be
come interested.
There are in the United States 3,239
Lutheran ministers. Of these, the
largest number in any one State is
in Pennsylvania, which has 550; Illi
nois has 365; Ohio, 340; Wisconsin,
265; Minnesota, 228; New York, 180;
Iowa, 168; Indiana, 135; Michigan,
118. No other State has a hundred.
There are at the present day estab
lished in the Fiji islmds about 900
Wesleyan churches and 1.400 schools.
The communicants are numbered by
thousands. The schools aro attended
by nearly 50,000 children, and out of
a population of about 120,000, over
100,0(10 aro reckoned as regular at
tendants at the churches. Idolatry is
scarcely known, and cannibalism, for
which these inlands were eo famous
only fifty years ago, has boerr"volun
tarily abandoned save by a single tribe.
The Capitalist and the Editor.
" I eanie in to ask," bsgan a little old
man in a whisper, looking as if feauul
of beiug overheard, und drawing his
chair close up to the editor, "if you
know anything of tho condition of the
Nevada Bank ?"
'No special information," replied
the editor.
'Then you ihink it solvent-per-
fectlv solvent?" demanded the little
man, with intense easernoss.
Certainly."
' Mifcht I ask what its capital is its
naid ud capital ?"
" Three millions, I believe," said tho
editor, beginning to wonder what man
ner of man had floated against him.
'And," continued the man in black,
tugging in nervous excitement at his
thin onl straggling iron gray beard.
whats the Nevada Uank'a reserve-
its reserve that's what I want to find
out?"
"Four millions, I think."
"And how is it invested how is it in
vested?" He fairly gulped with eager
ness as he glued his eyes upon those of
the editor and awaited tne reply:
"In United States bonds."
" Ah." he said, with a great sigh of
relief, " I'm glad oi that. Then " - here
ho looked all around to make sure there
were no listeners "then you think a
man could safely intrust his money
to it?"
" Why, certainly. There is no safer
bank in the world. It has unlimited
backing."
The little old man cuuesled and
took the editor's hand, which he shook
almost gleefully.
" lou nave done me a great favor,
sir," he exclaimed, " a great favor and
I shall not forget it."
" It bothers you to be sure that your
money's safe, I suppose, sir ?' said the
editor with that respect in tone and
manner which every independent citi
zen instinctively assumes when address-
ins a wealthy man.
well er no, not lust yet. The
fact is," he cried with a burst of confi
dence, " I'm about to change my man
ner of life. I'm fifty-five to-day aud
have formed a resolution that hence
forth I shall save my money instead of
spending it. as I have done from my
youth up, and I have suffered consid
erable anxiety about where to put my
money when I get it In point of fact,
he went on, his cadaverous face beam'
ing, "I am just now excessively hard
up, and if you could oblige me, sir, with
the loan of a dollar until I am started
on my new career you would lay me un
aer a neavy obligation."
The editor staggered toward the
club in the corner, but when he turned
he was alone. lirginit wy aev
Vnrontcle,
Tears.
Is it rainy, little flower r
Be glad of rain.
Too much sun would wither thee J
'Twill shino again.
The clouds aro vory b'aelj, 'tis true ;
But just behind them ehinos the blue.
Art thou weary, tender heart ?
Be (1 id of pain.
In sorrow sweetest things will grow,
As flowers in rai l.
Cod watehos, and thou wilt have snm
When clouds thoir porfect work have done.
M. F. Built.
HUMOR OF THE DAY.
There ia one thini to bo said in favor
of knee breeches they don't bag at the
knees.
Tho nine that none of the league
ill clubs care to taokle strych
nine. Rome Sentinel.
A man who was formerly a nigh
watchman refers to it as his late ooou
pation. Lowell Citizen.
Philadelphia has an artist named
Sword. When eight years of age he
was only a little bowio.
Persons desirous of learning insect
fe shonld interview tho bee. He can
always give you a point. Salum Sun
beam. Palti is thirtv-nine years old, and
has been just that old so long she is
used to it, and it doesn't worry her a
cent's worth.
Some epicures object to duck as a re
freshment, because if tho bird isn't
well picked the consumer is very apt to
feel down in the mouth.
Why. of course a dress coat is the
proper garment to waar at a swell din
nor. It doesn't button in front, and
gives you a chance to swell.
" A Bk no woman her age," says a
recent writer on social ethics. Of
course not. ask uer next best iaay
friend. She will never fail to give the
information.
You aro right in objecting to the
principle that the bulldog is entitled
to the whole of the sidewalk, but if he
wants it you'd better let him have it.
Boston I'oft.
" I am beside myself," said Lorenzo,
as he stood by a portrait of himself in
the artist's studio. " It isn't the first
time though, Lorenzo, sighed his wife
in martyr tones.
An Italian lady knows forty lan
guages and talks tuirty-two, yet when
she gets right mad this knowledge is of
no use, for her husband can only un
derstand one of them.
The 222d asteroid has been discov
ered, and the world moves right along
as if man had no further mission here
than making snit soap or whittling up
shingles. Free Prix.
Our exchanges contain frequent men
tion of pound sociables." We have
no idea what they r.re, unless they are
the kind of entertainment Sullivan and
Ryan indulged iu lately. fiiftinga.
A statistician computes that
one
hundred and fifty tons cf human
hair
nnually clianco owners iu Jt ranoe.
We
are unablo to gi'e tho figures for this
country, as the Indir.ns keep no re
cords. " Intelligent!" said the man of his
setter dog, " He knows a heap, sir.
Why, once ho took tv dislike to a man
nd went and induced the man to kick
him so I would lick the man! Fact,
Bir!" 1'oslon Tin nscript.
At a high school examination the
teacher asked tho son of an old ice
dealet how inanv ouueos tlicro was iu a
pound. And tho boy said it depended
on the extent of the ?rop, the length
of the summer and the heat of the
weather, varying from 5 1-2 to 113-4,
but never reaching as high as sixteen.
Uawkeyc.
The duties of tho genuine dyed-m
tho wool, simon-pure eJitor are multi
farious aud multitudinous, ms worK
is not only to "doalittio writin, " as is
sometimes supposed, but to cull, to
glean, to select, to discriminate, to de
cide, to foresee, to observe, to grasp, to
explain, to elucidate, to inflate, to boil
down, " to be, to do and to suffer," and
several hundred other verbs, with a
arge number of districts jet to hear
from. Newsdealer? Bulletin.
Amending the Itepoitp.
Our Continent proposes that the
prosy Congrenshnal Record be occasion
ally veiled witu rnymmg paraphrases oi
tho .honorable members' speeches-
something, for instance, afterthis style:
Then up roee Smith, of Florida, the bent of the d
bateri,
And epoke abont his measure for protecting alliga
tors;
lie showed how tourists shoot at them without re- .
pard for reason,
And asked to have It made a crime t kill tbrm out
of season.
Then Brown he moved amendment by lnsen.ng a
Drier clause
Compelling alligators not to operate their jaws;
isut Mumi ne up ana earn oi mm wuo luougui toe
suhiect comical.
That nature, when she gave him sense, bad been to
economical.
And brown, responding briefly, wished to say 1b
this connection,
That Smith, in guarding reptiles, had an eye to self
protection; Then Smith be flung a volume of th Hessage and
iteports,
And Brown was laid upon the floor a good deal out
or sorts
Supplying a Demand.
A Philadelphia reporter has recently
mado a tour of the shops in that city
where modern timber is turned into
antique furnituro for the benefit of per
sons wno long to possess something to
indicate that they had ancestors. One
of the dealers said to him confidentially:
" xue neit will be old lumuy portraits.
There's a man some here iu this city
who has been to Euroreand bought up.
in junk shops and other places, a lot of
old canvases wita lie.ids on them. He
got two or three clever young men to
dress them up and copy them and make,
them up into sets, thus: Knights in
armor, fifteenth cei tury; man iu a ruff,
sixteenth century; jouth as a cavalier
or Puritan, seventeenth century; Pil
grim father, eighteenth century; Mr.
Brown, of Spruce street, nineteenth
century; sot complete in harmonious
frames, say SI, 000. Cheap and excel
lent idea and are sure to take. Call
again."