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HENRY A. PARSONS, Jr., Editor and ..Publisher. NIL DESPERANDTJM. Two Dollars per Annum.
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VOL. VI. MDGAVAY, ELK COUNTY, PA., THURSDAY, JUNE 22, 187G. NO. 18.
1 i
Dying In Harness.
i
Only a fallen bone stretched out there on the
road,
Stretched in the broken shafts, and crashed
by the heavy load j
Ouly a fallen horse, and a eirole of wonderiDg
eyes
Watching the 'frighted teamster goading the
beast to Hue.
old ! for his toil is over no more labor for
bim i
See the poor neck outstretched and the patient
eyes grow dim ;
Bee on the friendly stones how peacefully
rests his head
Thinking, if dumb beasts think, how good it is
to be dead ;
After the burdened journey, how restful it is
to lie
With tbo broken shafts and the cruel load,
waiting ouly to die.
Watchers, he died in harness, died in the
shafts and Btraps,
Fell, and the great load killed him ; one of the
' day's miehapt,
One of tbo passing wonders marking the city
road,
A toiler dying in harness, heedless of call or
goad.
Fdssors, crowding the pathway, staying your
steps awhile,
What is the (symbol ? "Only death? Why
should we cease to smile
At death for a beast of burden f ' On ; through
the busvBtreot
That is ever and ever echoing the tread of the
hurrying feotl
Wiiat was the sign ? A symbol to touch the
tireless will
Does lie who taught in pa' ablos speak in para
ble still?
The soed on the rock is wasted, on hecdloss
hearts ( f men,
That ga her and sow, and grap and lose, labor
and sleep, acd thou
Then for the piize ! A crowd in the street of
ever-echoing trtad,
Tho toiler, crushed by thelioavy load, in there
in bin haruess, dead!
A GREAT MISTAKE.
When pre tty little Nollie May married
Frank Chester, she really believed that
fclie was entering upon iv mo of uncloud
ed happiness an unlimited extension,
iu fact, of lit r toKkn courtship days,
whorein discords would be altogether
impossible.
Loving her husband sincerely, the lit
tle wife wits far too loyal to admit even
to herself the greatness oi her disap
pointment, yet the melancholy truth was
plain. A cloud had darkened the do
mestic horizon a cloud of such size and
blackness that it had well nigh shaded
the honeymoon, aud had threatened dire
storms and tempests ever since. And
this cloud, to drop metaphor, was noth
ing less than Frauk Chester's mother
t. hiiii, the embodiment of wisdom, the
fonutaiu-i:ead of knowledge; to his
wife, a constantly quoted, and therefore
disagreeable, purugon, who threatened
to develop into the destroyer of her hap
piness. Whatever Nellie did whether she
arranged her house or meditated some
new decoration of walls or rooms,
whether she superintended hia favorite
dish or made his after dinner coffee
with her own hands the result was al
ways the same. " Ah, that isn't the
way my mother used to do," or, "I
ouly wish mother was here ; she could
show you a bettor wuy," was Frank's in
variable comment, until Nellie began to
fear that she should learn to hate her
mother-in-law, and to look forward with
dism;iy to the visit which Mrs. Chester
senior talked of paying them, but which
had beou fortunately delayed thus far.
At the end of this first month of house
keeping Frank expressed himself in no
measured terms when poor Nellie timid
ly announced that she had not money
enough to pay all the bills.
Not money enough? Why, Nellie,
you must have been very extravagant or
very wastful, or both. Why, my mother
always kept house on just half of the
allowanco I make you; and she had Ave
children at home, while here we have
only ourselves 1 Really, my dear, you
must look after things a little better
than this, or you will ruin me. All that
money spent on two people, and the
bills only half paid 1"
But, Frank," urged Nellie, trying
hard to be cool, and forcing back the
tears.that would spring to her eyes
"but, Frauk, you know your mother
has only one servant you have often eaid
so and we have three. Of course that
makes a difference. And then you have
, had a great many dinner parties, and
you have no idea how many extra things
a dinner involves."
Nonsense, Nellie ; you need not lay
the blame on our having dined half a
dozen people during the month, for I
don't believe that makes an atom of
difference in the long run. No, the
fault is in your inexperience. You must
look after those servants of yours more
closely. I only wish yon had mother
here for a couplo of months ; she would
find the leaks, I know, and stop them
too I But thou, of course, you have
never had the advantage of such thorough
training as mother has given her daugh
ters. Why, she has made Jane as capa
ble as herself."
" And I am very glad I haven't had
such a training ' as you speak of," said
Nellie, hotly. My own dear mother
was always prudent, and taught her chil
dren to be the same ; but she used to
to say that when people had ample
means, economy was too often another
name for stiugiuess, and I believe she
was right."
Mother was not stingy," said Frank,
with an angry flush.
" I don't see how she lived on such a
paltry sum and supported so 'large a
family without giving her whole mind to
petty savings, which oould have left her
no time for better and brighter things.
She must have given up reading and
musio and all that, and to what end I
Just to add a few more dollars to your
already large income. Now I think that
is the worst kind of stinginess, since it
defrauds the mind and soul to no pur
pose whatever."
" And I think it is a wife's duty to
please her husband," Frauk xolaiia
more annoyed than his wife could guess,
for her random thrust had come close to
the truth. " Mother devoted her life
to her family, and if it had not been for
the economy yon despise, might not
have had so much money for wasting
now."
But poor Nellie, much too fond of her
husband to find quarreling anything but
misery, was fairly vanquished by this
time,"and retired in tears, leaving the
inglorious victor to draw checks for the
bills, and to soothe his disturbed con
Bcionco by resolving to buy his wife a
new pair of bracelets that very day.
So the thing had been going on, some
times better, sometimes worse Nellie
fairly disheartened at the malign influ
ence that her mother-in-law, though so
ror distant, seemed to exercise over her
life; Frank utterly perplexod by the
storm that followed every allusion to his
mother's ways, every quotation of her
mnxims.
He never dreamed of the pain he was
inflicting, or of the injustice of his con
stant comparisons; and so, never imag
ining that he could be to blame, he at
tributed all the dissensions that were
fust imbitteriug their lives to Nellie's
temper.
"Strango, she always seemed so ami
able and gentle at home, that she should
Erove so capricious and irritable now,"
e said to himself on more than one oc
casion; and he was fast settling into the
belief that he was a model husband,
with a most perversely tempered wife,
when a fortunate accident showed him
the truth fo forcibly that he was fain to
accept the lesson.
The first anniversary of their mar
riage was close at hand, and Nellie had
planned a pleasant surprise for her hus
band iu Iho shape of a dinner party
composed of six of his most particular
friends.
Everything was succeeding finely.
The invitations were all accepted and the
guests pledged to secrecy, the menu was
of the daintiest, and her now dinner
dress, reserved for this occasion, un
usually becoming, when, on the very
morning of the eventful day, Frank
pulled a letter out of his overcoat pocket
as he was leaving the house, saying at
the same time:
" There, Nollie, I forgot to tell you
las t night, bnt mother wrote yesterday
to say that you may expect her this af
ternoon. The fact is, I invited her to
spend our wodding anniversary with us;
but I wouldn't tell you before, thinking
to givo you a pleasant surprise. Now
yon can have a room in readiness, as she
will arrive about four o'clock, and I will
meet her at tho boat and bring her up
here. Good-bye, little womm;" and
Frank departed, serenely unconscious
of tho vexation and dismay he left be
hind. Poor Nellie thrust the unwelcome let
ter into her pocket without reading it,
nd then hunying to her bedroom,
locked tho door and sat down to have a
good cry.
Nellie had never seen Mrs. Chester
until her wedding day, and even then
-iho bad found little to please her iu the
tall, angular, prim maunered woman who
offered such a decided contrast to b.or
handsome, lively son, with his genial
temper and ready wit.
Frank had done his best on that occa
sion to be cordial for both, but, though
he was much too happy to see it, the
two ladies had been as frigid as their re
lationship allowed them to be, Bud the
year that had passed had not brought
them nearer together.
All this and more passed through
poor Nellie's mind before she wiped
away hertears aud begun to think of nil
that yet remained to bo done, aud of the
impossibility of appearing at her dinner
table with red eyes.
"At least," she said to herself, I
will not lot this day be marred by any
ill temper. I will try, for Frank's sake,
to welcomo his mother, and no mutter
how she mw criticise, I will be ami
able." But another and a far gruver sorrow
awaited the poor little woman, for just
as she rose from the table a telegram
wai placed iu hor hand, and, with a tud
deu presage of ill, she tore opeu the
envelope. Iler fears were continued J
the dispatch was from her father, to an
nounce the sudden and perhaps fatal ill
ness of her mother, and urging her to
lose no time if the would see her once
more. With finking hands and sinking
heart, Nellio made her preparations for
immediate departure. Her husband,
who had received a similar message, was
speedily at home, and made every
arrangement for her comfort, soothing
her as far as possible with hopc-f ul words,
and so loving and sympathetic withal
that Nellie felt it doubly hard to leave
him.
" If I could possibly leave my busi
ness on finch short notice, you should
not go alone, little wifey ; but you may
depend on seeing me in a day or two,
and meanwhile you must write and tele
graph constantly," he said.
"And if (as I hardly dare to hope)
mother should be better, you need not
come until next week ; bnt be sure to
write to me every day, for I shall find so
ranch comfort in your letters," said Nel
lie, eagerly.
The promise was given, and then she
suddenly remembered the dinner party,
which could no longer be kept secret, so
her intended surprise was unfolded to
her husband.
" I did not mean to let yon know about
it until you came home to-night," she
said, smiling faintly at his thanks for
this proof of her loving thoughtfulness.
" And what a sad ending to your pleas
ant little scheme I" he added, "and
what am I to do without you, darling ?
Do you think I could let them know in
time not to come ?"
Nellie shook her head. "Impossible,
Frank; it is nearly five now, and they
were invited for six o'clock. Besides,
you will have barely time to meet your
motner now; you will have to drive fast,
after leaving me at the cars, if you want
to meet the boat."
" That's true," said Frank, "looking
at his watch as they drove toward the
depot "Why, do you know, Nellie, I
had quite forgotten that mother was
coming, for this trouble of yours has
driven everything else out of my mind."
It tooK some time to explain matters
to that lady's entire satisfaction; that
her daughter-in-law should have left her
house on snoh short notice, and left it
entirely to tho control ef her servants,
was to her mind a very damaging fact,
wnicn she commented npon very freely.
" It seems to me, Frank, that your
wife must be a very careless house
keeper, to start off in such a hurry, and
never even wait to see if I was coming.
Why, suppose I had not arrived this
afternoon, there would have been abso
lutely no head to the house."
" But Nellie was anxious to get to her
mother as soon as possible, you know,"
said Frank, not altogether pleased.
"Of course, that's all very proper,
but still a married woman has much to
consider, aud her first and pnramount
duty is always to her husband and her
homo. And a true wife will be careful
to avoid unnecessary expenses."
Her son winced a little at this appli
cation o. the very maxim which he had
so often quoted to poor Nellie as his
mother's guiding principle, but he made
no reply. She went on :
" I suppose it is about your dinner
hour, isn't it, Frank ? The fact is, I am
rather hungry, for I wouldn't spend a
dollar for dinner on the boat, and I had
only a sandwich and an apple in my
traveling bag, but I shall enjoy your
dinner all the more."
"That remiuds me, mother," said
Frank, as he helped her out of the car
riage at his own door, "that we are to
have a dinner party to-night, six of our
most intimate friends, whom Nellie in
vited to celebrate the day."
"But things won't be ready, now she
has gone so suddenly."
"Oh, our servant j will attend to all
that," said Frauk; but his mother inter
rupted him with a gesture of dismay.
"Just as I expected li' she exclaimed;
"just as I expected I My poor boy,
you are living at a ruinous wasteful rate,
and I must try my best to reform your
wife's domestic management and show
you how to get along. Why, Frank,
yon must remember how differently I
managed my household when you were
a boy at home, and how I looked after
everything myself. Do you happen to
know if Nellio goes into her kitchen
immediately after breakfast every day,
us a careful housewife should ?"
' Why, the fuct is," said Frank, fairly
stammering as he explained, " that I
have had a fancy that Nellie in short,
she has boen in the habit of taking a
walk every morning, and she has gener
ally walked down with me part of the
way her health, you know " And here
he broke down entirely, for his mother's
eyes were fixed full upon him with a
look of such astonishment and disap
proval that he fairly wilted.
I suppose she spends the afternoon
in domestio duties."
" In the afternoon she generally goes
out to pay visits or attend receptions or
matinees, or things of that sort. You
know, mother, Nellie has a large circle
of friends, and her social duties must
not be neglected."
"And when does she ever find time
for making your shirts or her own dross
es, or even for making cake and pies and
preserves ?" was the next question.
Frank almost laughed as he replied:
"The fact is, mother, things are man
nged very differently in the city, and as
we have three servants, Nellie does not
iind it necessary to spend her time in
sewing or cooking. Besides, I want her
to keep up her music, and she practices
several hours each day."
" You don't meuu to tell me that you,
two in a family, keep three girls to wait
upon you ? Oh, Frank 1 Frank 1 how
you have changed t I only wish I had
come here when you begun housekeep
ing, and I might have taught your wife
economy; but now I am afraid it is too
late."
In due time the guests arrived. Many
were the regrets over Nellie's absence,
which, in truth, cast an undeniable cloud
over the entertainment, and much cym
pathy was expressed by all ; but the din
ner was an entire success in a gastrono
mic point of view, and the host was
well pleased with the commendations it
called forth. Still he could not help see
ing that his mother was disapproving,
and as one course succeeded another,
her dismay and astonishment became
more evident.
As soon as possible he managed an
adjournment to the par!or, where his
mother, despite his entreating look, de
clined to follow, and after some pleasant
chat his friends departed.
As the door closed on the last one,
Frank, hearing loud voices in the dining-room,
returned thither to find his
mother and Mary engaged in angry dis
cussion as to the proper method of dis
posing of the relics of the feast. Much
as Frank was annoyed by the instant
appeal which both parties made to him
as he entered the room, he was yet too
dutiful a son to hesitate.
While your mistress is absent,
Mry," he said to the excited waitress,
' I shall expect you to obey my mother;
but, of course, Mrs. Chester will return
in a day or two, and then she will take
everything into her own hands again.
Until then my mother is the head of the
house."
"Frank, I never dreamed of such
wastefulness as I've seen to-night. Why,
there was enough left of that dinner to
feed you all for a week to come, and that
girl was determined to pnt it all down
stairs, where, I dare say, it would all
have been given away by to-morrow
night. But I was determined to stop
that, so I made her bring the things all
here to me, and I've got them under
lock and key. With proper economy "
But Frank, sick of the very word, had
taken his departure, and so the lecture
ended, Mrs. Chester going to her room
to plan reforms, Frank indulging in a
cigar, while he wondered how Nellie was
getting on, and wished most earnestly
that she was at home again.
" For," said he, dolefully, to him
self, ' I'm afraid 1 shall have to break
up housekeeping if she stays more than
three clays."
If Nellie could have heard him I
Morning brought a telegram from
Nellie to say that her mother, though
very ill, was out of danger, and an
nouncing her own intention of staying
with the invalid for come time. Later
in the day a letter confirmed the tele
gram. "I am sure you will get along
nicely without me, dear Frank, since
you nave your mother," wrote Nellie;
" and as I am really very much needed
here, I know you will not object if I
prolong my stay to a fortnight."
" .V fortnight I" groaned Frank;
" why oouldn't she have said a year I
It would have been about as reasonable.
But I know what I'll do; I will go after
her when the week is out, and bring her
home."
When Frank reached his home that
evening he was surprised to find that
everything was datk. The hall gas was
not lit; neither was the fire whose cheer
ful radiance had always made his pleas
ant library doubly pleasant. Stumbling
throngh the dark room, he finally suc
ceeded in getting a match and striking
it, but when he would have applied tho
flame to the drop light, why, that was
nowhere to be seen. Hastily lighting a
side burner, he rang the bell for Mary,
but before she could answer his sum
mons his mother appeared.
Opening the door which connected
tho library with the dining-room, she
said :
" Oh, Frank, is that you f Come right
in here and get warm, for it is a cold
night, I know."
" But where is Mary ? And what does
she mean by neglecting to light the fire ?
And Hallo I who pul the drop light
in here t Why, mother, don't you know
that belongs in the library?" And
Frank was about to rfag another bell
and call Mary to strict account, when his
mother stopped him.
"I told ner not to make a fire there,
Frank, for as long as you and I are
alone, we might just na well sit in here
and save fuel and light.', So I made her
bring in the drop lighf and your easy
chair, and I've been sitting here all day
myself, to save fire up siairs."
"This is all nonsense, mother," ex
claimed Frank, vehemently. " Nellie
and I never thought of sitting in this
room, and besides, I don't like furnace
heat ot all, as yon may remember. I al
ways have a fire in the library when the
weather in cold enough, and I couldn't
read my paper anywhere else. So, with
your permission, I will have these things
restored to their righb plaoes, and then
we'll have our dinner.''
At this moment, ba'ore Mrs. Chester
could say anything core, Mary made
her appearance, but shawled and bon
neted, with a large traveling bag in her
hand. Standing near L,he door, she said,
wrathfully :
"If you please, Mr. Chester, ( would
like my wages, for I'm going to leave
to-night. Things are very different
from what they was when our Mrs.
Chester was at home, and as I can't
give satisfaction, I'd better be going.
I'll send for my trnik in the morning,
unless the old lady," with a defiant
glance at Mrs. Chester, " would like to
search it first."
" Nonsense, Mary," said Frank, real
izing in a moment his own present dis
comfort and his wile's dismay if Mary
were suffered to depart "nonsense;
you lire not going at all. Why, what
would your mistress say . Then sbe re
turned ? Now just go up stairs and take
off your hat, aud then come down and
wait on the table like a good girl." And
dextrously leading hei to the door, ho
whispered: " Just do the best you can,
Mary, and I'll give you five dollars
extra, and the others too. My wife will
bo home in a week, and then all will be
right again."
Turning back to the dining-room, con
siderably ruffled, Frank refused to hear
anything about Mary, txtravogance in
goneral, and his own extravagance in
particular, and pretended to be deep in
his newspaper until ('.inner was served.
But even this ordiutrily agreeable
meal was to be' an annoyance to-night,
for it was made up entirely of the rem
riants of tho last night's feast, and Fiank
grumbled audibly, mnch to his mother's
surprise.
" I'm sure I don't kaow what has
come over you, Frank," she said, se
verely. " Last night you iiad ten times
as much on the table as you needed, and
to-night you object to eating those
things, when it's the only way to keep
them from being wasted.
" I know very well that I have been a
fool, but I am quite cured of my folly
now; and so Nellio will find when she
gets back," said Frank.
A week passed. The servants grum
bled, rebelled, and were only saved from
open mutiny by constant remonstrances
aud entreaties on the part of their mas
ter, backed with more substantial argu
ments occasionally.
Frank said little if anything to his
mother, but like the famous owl, he
kept up an incessant thinking. His
daily letters to Nellie were almost piti
ful in their description of his forlorn
condition, and brought quick loving an
swers from his little wife.
At the end of that week Mrs. Chester
was suddenly summoned home, and
Frank had .no sooner seen her safely
embarked on the boat then he hastened
to his office, arranged for a few days of
absence, and took the first train to Glen
wood, where he surprised and delighted
his wife by his unexpected presence.
In the days that followed the reunion
Frank confessed his change of views
with great candor and many self-accusations.
Nellie was too well pleased to be
unforgiving, and the element of discord
was hushed. When tho husband and
wife returned to their home, nothing
was said about Mrs. Chester's ways an3
methods, and from that time onward
Frank was content to let Nellie expend
such proportion of his ample inoome as
their social position demanded, without
grumbling at necessary outlays.
Indeed, he was heard to say in after
years, that the man who attempted to
make of his wife a Eecond edition of
his mother, was only making a very
great mistake.
New Hampshire's Finances.
The message of the governor of New
Hampshire contains the following state
ment of the State finances : Revenue
for 1876 receipts from State tax, $400,
000 ; receipts from other sources, $103,
328.19 total revenue, $503,328.19.
Current expenses for 1876 ordinary,
$39,461.87 ; extraordinary, $29,395.05 ;
interest on State debt, $222,629.81
total expenses, $391,536.23 showing an
excess of revenue of $111,791.96, which
is the amount of the reduotion of the
State debt during the year. The lia
bilities of the State are $3,629,638.49.
Sixty-eight savings banks are in opera
tion, with deposits of $31,188,064.16, an
increase of $989,578,45. Bank invest
ments show a decided improvement.
Loans on real estate havo increased
$1,000,000.
Varieties in Fashions.
Gold embroidery on linen cuffs and
collars is a striking novelty that will
probably fail to be popular.
Long white scarfs of crepe lisse tuck
ed iu each end are worn as neckties and
cravat bows in mourning. Three cor
nered neckerchiefs of black net fringed
with crimped tape fringe are also used in
mourning.
Wide silk galloon, richly embroidered,
is tho new trimming for evening dresses
of light colored silks, It comes in pale
green, cream, blue and rose colored
grounds, wrought with vines, flowers,
bees and butterflies in natural colors.
Single branches of thickly clustered
small flowers are placed down the mid
dle of bonnet crowns between the trim
ming scarfs of soft silk. Among these,
dwarfed roses, pink or yellow, the flow
ering almond and buttercups are favorite
flowers.
A single long loop of ribbon or of the
dress trimming is sewed on the demi
trained skirt of costumes, and the skirt
is raised to a proper walking length by
Eassing the hand through the loop and
olding up the demi train. Long trains
of evening dresses are raised in the
same way.
Gold braid is more used for handsome
dresses than it promised to be when
first introduced. It is carefully used in
threads and dots of gold on black gal
loon for trimming black grenadine dress
es. Silvered braid is the trimming seen
on the most elegant costumes of gray
camel's hair.
Black brocaded silk parasols, with
steeple tops, rings, and edged with
cream colored lace, are considered the
first choice this season. Those of black
silk covered with black guipure lace are
also much admired. A coral set for a
white lace and silk parasol now consists
of the carved coral handle, the carved
stick for the pagoda top, a coral ring to
pass over the parasol and olose it, with
seven or eight tiny hands of coral to
finish the end of each gore of the canopy
and attach the lace to the silk. The coral
ornaments alone, before they are mount
ed, cost $50. Parisiennes, when driving
iu open carriages, use large red silk
parasols of the dark shade known as
Russia leather red. They also nse dark
myrtle green parasols, bordered with
green shaded cocks' plumes. Bazar.
Animal Sagacity.
The Rochester Union tells the fol
lowing story concerning "a medium
sized black and tan dog of unusual
spirit and intelligence," owned in that
city : On a recent occasion, when out
with its master, a good sized woodchuck
was discovered by the dog partially con
cealed under a large tree, and in such a
position that it could not be dislodged
by ordinary means, and could not be
reached by the eager terrier, who was
wild at the prospect of his prey escaping
him. It occurred to one of the party
that by pouring water iu the burrow the
groundhog would be forced to evacuate
his quarters and give battle to tho dog.
A creek ran near by, and, finding an old
tiu pail, water was carried to the root of
the tree and the 'chuck flooded out.
His fate was soon decided by the dog,
who is said to have shown more than
ordinary satisfaction at the result, and
from the after result must have taken a
mental note of the means by which the
burrowing animal was brought within
his reach. This occurred several weeks
ago, and had almost passed from the
recollection of the dog's owner, when it
was recalled by the following strange, if
true, incident : In taking his customary
"constitutional in tho woods, the gen
tleman not thinking of any such thing
as the destruction of a woodchuck, was
astonished to see his dog stop like a
well trained setter on the bank of a small
creek, and sniff eagerly at something on
the other side. It hesitated but a mo
ment and then dashed into the water
and was soon digging with a vim at tho
root of an old treo and looking up
anxiously toward his master, as if con
scions that the assistance of the latter
was absolutely necessary to the success
of his design on the woodchuck which
he had found. His owner, not wishing
to disappoint the dog, went over to see
what was up. He found the situation
to be similar to that of the occasion when
a deluge enabled the dog to make away
with his foe. But this time there was
no pail at hand, and it appeared as if
the woodchuck would escape. In this
emergency the dog suddenly disap
peared, and it was not known where he
had gone. He was absent five or ten
minutes, and on making his appearance
astonished bis master by his frantic ef
forts to run along with an old tin pre
serve can, which he was carrying in hia
mouth, although it partially covered his
eyes.
A Slight Mistake.
An individual attired in a gray suit of
clothes, and presenting the appearance
of a policeman, going down a San Fran
cisco street, was saluted by a Celestial
cigar dealer, who beckoned him into his
sevsn-by-nine shop aud invited him to
take a cigar. The man was astonished,
but nevertheless complied and lighted
the cigar which the dealer presented to
him.
"Whas your number?" asked the
Chinaman.
" Number 1 I haint got no number. '
" You no policeman?"
"Policeman? Oh, no." 4
"You pay me ten centsee. I heap
like pleeceman. Yon no pleeceman you
pay me ten centsee. 1 heap pay
license.
The man refused to pay a cent, where
upon the Chinaman drew a police whistle
and blew lustily for a moment, but no
noliceman imt in an appearance. Fin
ally an elderly Celestial emerged from
the intenor, and patting the citizen on
the shoulder very smoothingly said
"You heap good man. You pay ten
centsee. You belly good man."
The citizen being considerably molli
fled drew out a ten-cent piece and hand
ed to the Chinaman, who retired into his
shop very well satisfied.
" Do you love me Bt'll, John ?" wins
pered a sensitive wife to her bus baud
' Of course I do the stiller the bet
ter," answered the stupid husband.
The Parsces and their Dead.
While tho Mohammedan buries his
dead, as do the Christians, in ceme
teries, and rears columns and shafts
above the graves J and while the Hindoo
"cremates" his dead, putting them
aloft on funeral pyres which are fired,
and consume them, tho Parsees employ
a far different method, and one that is
intensely repulsive. On the summit
of high hills they build a circular wall,
over which, as a roof, they place an
iron granting, sloping from the circum
ference downward to the centor. On
this grating tho bodies are laid, to be
gradually consumed by birds of prey.
The bones then drop into the space be
neath. A writer thus describes the
great Parsee cemetery at Bombay : "We
came to the Parsee home of the dead.
It is a hill inclosed with a very high
wall. On the snmmit there is a dense
grove of palm trees, in the center of
which, and high above the foliage, rises
the 'Tower of Silence.' The tower in
closes and protects a dark, deep, open
well, and across the top of the tower is
a firmly-fixed grating of iron bars. The
dead are laid npon this grating, the flesh
to be the food of the birds of the air ;
the bones, as they fall assunder from
exposure and decay, to drop into the
promiscuous pit below. The Parsee
who was our guide protested that this
giving up the remains of friends and
kindred to the vulture, the eagle, and
the raven, seemed horrible to him ;
wherefore, when he was not long ago
called npon to deposit the remains of a
wife, then of a daughter, he protcoted
them with strong metallic screens, so
that the remains were left to natural de
composition from the sacred heat of the
sup, and were absorbed in the pure at
mosphcro which ho enlightens."
The Robin's Note.
The other morning a bad man was be
ing conveyed to prison, there to remain
for long, long years. He walked the
streets with irons on his wrists, and the
glorious sun beaming down npon him as
it kissed tho dew from the leaves of the
maple and chestnut. His eyes had a
sullen, vicious look, and there was some
thing wicked in his very step. The offi
cer halted with him a moment just
where tho eye vould trace a beautiful
street for a full mile, with every green
tree holding its leaves up to be kissed
by the warm snu. Just then a robin
left its nest iu the branches above their
heads and uttered its loudest, happiest
notes iu praise of the glorious morning.
The bad man looked up, then around
him, and such a change came to his face
that the officer was amazed. The bad
look had left the eyes, the hard lines
went away, and there was a quivering of
the ohiu as he whispered :
"And I have got to be shut up from
all this."
The robin sung again, wildly, softly,
and so clear that its notes might be
heard a long way off. The bad man's
eyes were full of tears, and he said in a
husky voice :
How could I have been so wicked
with such glad notes as thoso to ring in
my ears and make my heart tender !"
"The man of whom witnesses had said,
"He has tho heart of a tiger," was
broke a down in one short moment, aud
he blushed that men should see the irons
on his wrists and point him out as a
criminal.
Mystery of Dreams.
It is related that a man fell asleep as
the clock tolled tho first stroke of twelve.
He awakened ere the echo of the twelfth
stroke had died awny, havii.g, ia the in
terval, dreamed that he committed a
crime, was detected after five years,
tried and condemned; tho shock of find
ing tho halter about his neck aroused
him to consciousness, when he discov
ered that all these events had happened
in an luhuitesimal fragment ot time,
Mohammed, wishing to illustrate the
wonders of sleep, tolJ how a certain
man, being a shiek, found himself, for
his pride, made a poor fisherman; that
he lived as one for sixty years, bringing
up a family and working hard; and how,
upon waking up from this long dream,
so short a time had ho been asleep that
the narrow necked gourd bottle filled
with water, which he knew he over
turned as he fell asleep, had not time in
which to empty itself. How fast the
soul travels when the body is asleep 1
Often, when, we awake, we shrink from
going back into tho dull routine of a
sordid existence, regretting the pleas-
anter life of dreamland. How is it that
sometimes, when we go to a strange
place, we fancy that we nave seen it be
fore ? Is it possible that when one has
been asleep the soul has floated away,
seen the place, and has that memory of
it which so surprises us I in a word.
how far dual is the life of man, how far
not?
Au Asiatic Monster.
A correspondent of tho Invalidc
Itiwse, writing from Khokand, says that
Fulat Bek (Pulad-Beg the steel prince)
was held in great abhorrence by the na
tives for his excessive cruelty and bru
tality. His favorite pastime was slaugh
tering innocent people like so many
sheep. This odious monster is said to
havo taken the lives of 3,700 people
during his short rule in Marchilan. He
was particularly relentless toward the
family of iludoyar Khan, slayingnotonly
the wives of his rival, but also the little
children. After the capture of Marchi
lan by Skobeleff this general would not
allow his men to occupy the citadel-
i. e. , the late residence of Pulad for it
literally reeked with blood, and had be
come a disgusting enamel nouse.
New Trimming Laces.
Among the newest white trimming
laces are real hand made Spanish laces
in light feathery designs that appear to
be made entirely of silk, in the popu
lar three-inch widths these cost $4
yaid. The Smyrna lace of pure linen
that has suddenly come into fashion for
trimming piques, ginghams, batistes,
children's clothing, and ladies' under
wear costs fifteen cents a yard for nar
row widths, while that two inches wide
is $1.50 a yard.
If you are in love and don't know
how to malie it known, go to yortr tailor,
lie will press your suit tut you,
Items of Interest.
A very narrow aperture The crack of
a whip.
Many a man worth a million is utterly
worth less.
The Texas Senate has passed a bill
excluding from jury duty all persons
unable to read and write the English
language.
Chinamen who cut off their pigtails
sell them to shopkeepers who supply
the San Francisco young ladie.i with
switches.
A new rule on tho Central Vermont
railroad requires every emyloyoe to take
the total abstinence pledge, and dis
missal is to follow a violation of it.
A despairing swain, in a fit of despera
tion, recently declared to his unrelenting
ladylove that it was his firm determina
tion to drown himself, or perish in the
attempt.
A clergyman said, the other day, that
modern young ladies were not daugh
ters of Shem and Ham, but daughters
of Hem and Sham, componnds of plain
sewing and make believe.
It is. asserted by an eminent English
physician that by the timely administra
tion of the hypophosites of lime or
soda, consumption can be stamped out
as thoroughly as smallpox by vaccina
tion. It is claimed that a true, ady never
loses her temper. We never knew of
one being really out of temper, though
since the present style of dress came
in we have seen them considerably
rnffled.
If ninety per cent, of the inmates of
our prisons are drinkers of ardent
spirits, as estimated by those in posi
tions that give weight to their judg
ment, the way iu which taxation may be
reduced is apparant.
A greenhorn arriving in town, on a
first visit, heard a boy calling "Oys
ters," aud asked: "What's that?"
"Oh, only oysters," said his friend.
" Great stars i" exclaimed tho verdant
one, " do oysters howl like that?"
A man with a large family was com
plaiuiug of the difficulty of supporting
nil of them. " Bnt," said a friend,
"you havo sons big enough to earn
something." The difliculty is," said
the man, " they are too big to work."
A captain caught a boy in the middle
watch frying some pork and eggs he had
stolen from the ship's stores, to whom
tho captain called out: " You lubber,
you I I'll havo none of that 1" "Faith,
captain, I've none lor ye, repueu tne
lad.
Somebody cave a Texas detective a
portrait of Shakespeare, and told him it
was a picture ot a norse tnici lor wnose
arrest there had beenai owocd offered.
Tho detective has since scrutinized
strauge faces close y, bnt has not arrest
ed anybody,
The man who is hardest to find is the
one who has an " office," porticularly if
he has "office hours." Whenever a
wishes to conceal himself from
the world, ho rents an office, hangs out
sign stating his otlice hours, and then
stays away forever.
The direct United States cable com
pany nave repeated tueir statements,
aud fortified them by a. report from Pro
fessor Thomson, of tllasgow, to the ellect
that the recent breakages of their cable
nuv-t have been the result of violenco
willfully applied.
On what two days iu a lifetime con a
man travel the furthest, and where does
ho travel on those two days? The day
boforo his marriage and the day after it.
me clay oeioro nis mnrnogo no is ui mo
Cape of Good Hope, and tho day i.ftor it
he is in the United States.
Four months ago a party of divers
started from San Francisco to recover
treasure from tho steamer Golden Gato,
which was wrecked in 1861 off tho coast
of Mexico, and from which $775,000
were raised in 1803. Laud had buried
tho vessel so deep that they could not
reach any of the $400,000 which are
supposed to be still there.
A beggar recently applied for alms at
the door of a partisan of the Anti-Mendicity
Society in Ediuburgh. After
vainly detail ng his manifold serrows,
ho was peremptorily dismissed by tho
inexorable gentleman. " Go away,"
said ho; "we cauna gie je naething."
You might, at least, returned tho
mendicant, with au air of great dignity
and archness, " have refused me gram
matically," Lawyers are sometimes very particular.
The other day one was waited upon by
young man, who began by saying
My father died and made a will. "Is
it possible? I never heard of inch a
thing," answered the lawyer. I
thought it happened every day, said
the young man; " but if there is to be
any difliculty about it I had better give
ou a lee to attend to tne business.
The fee was given and then the lawyer
observed : " Oh 1 I think I know what
you mean. You mean that your father
made a will and died yes, yes; that
must be it."
The elephant in a traveling circus in
San Francisco discovered a pocket in
the back part of a girl's dress, as she
was leaning against the rope and looking
the other way. He reached iu his trunk
and brought out an apple, which he ate.
Another trial yielded a package of gum
drops, and a third some peanuts. Again
he essayed and got bold of a bottle of
ammonia, the contents of which went
the way of the apple, the candy and the
peanuts. Iustantly the resentful ele
phant obliterated the girl's bustle, fill
ing the air with bits of cloth, newspa
per and whalebone.
Some distressing cases of death have
occurred among the people engaged in
the white lead works in England. The
Ijondon Lancet suggests that the follow
ing precautions should be mado compul
sory in all white lead manufactories :
"Clothes, gloves and caps should be
provided to be worn only at the works;
waterproof boots to be provided for
those working with the moist white
lead; respirators to be provided for
those working in tho dry lead works;
no one to be allowed to leave the works
unwashed or in his factory dress; and
that manufacturers should be empowered
to make special rules which should ren
der any of their workpeople amenable to
ifttr for disregarding them."