r tint HENRY A. PARSONS, Jr., Editor and Publisher. NIX, desperandum. Two Dollars per Annum. VOL. VI. It IDG AV AY, ELK COUNTY, PA., TIIUKSDAY, APRIL 27, 1870. NO. 10. Home. There is a land of every land the pride, Beloved by Heaven o'er all the world beside ; Whore brighter suns diijpe; se serener light, And mil lor moons emparadfre the night i A land of beauty, virtue, valo, truth, Time-tut -we age and love-exalted yonth. The wandering mariner, whose eye explores The wealthiest ieles, the most enohanting shores, Views not a realm so bonntifnl and fair, Nor breathes the spirit of a purer air; In every clime the magnet of his sonL, Touched by remembrance, trembles to that pole; For in this land of Heaven's peculiar grace, The heritage of nature's noblest race, There is a spot of earth snpromely blest, A dearer, sweeter spot than all the rest, Wbero man, creation's tyrant, casts Aside His sword and pcepter, pageantry and pride, While in his softened losks benignly blend The sire, the sou, the husband, brother, friend. Hero woman reign., the mother, daughter wife, Btrew with fresh flowers the narrow way of lire ! In the clear heaven of her delightful eye An angel guird of lovoa and graces lie; Around her knees domestic duties meet. And fireside pleasures gambol at her feet. Where shall that land, that spot of earth be found ? Art thon a man ? a patriot ? look around ; Oh! ti on shalt find, howe'er thy footsteps roam, That laud thy country, and that spot thy home ! HON I TOLD MY LOVE. Oh, the glories of a sleigh rido in the sparl ling brueitg nir of n Canadian win ter I Tlio shy clear nnd exhilarating keenly bright, but with a different de gree of lucidity from that of a bright 8n.mmcr's o.ay. Broad expanding plains the city receding behind us, us the hnrsoi , leapiug onward to the munia of their chiaiii g bells, make for the broad, boundl.isa country. The fir forests are clasped iu a shadowy, ghostly slumber. Far away on our right are those pathless fnuon id groves where the wolves con gregate in hundreds. To the left lies a ridge of hill sloping down tho river, which is locked up iu the iron manacles of the wi utor king. Ahead, ami right beforo us, whither we ure bound, over waste, nnd plain, and clearing, lies a snugly Bbelt ri d village, the headquar ters of the "lumberer" and the voya geur. Our destination is not quite bo far. This said destination is a broadly spread, low-lying farmstead, with its al most numberless outhouses, consisting of cattle sheds and dairies, corn stores, roofings for winter fodder, wood stacks, and other concomitants surrounding the dwelling, alljpalisudid by zigzag fences, as so many outworks to protect the com fortable citadel. Within it, warm fires blaze and sparkle frora the huge and odorous logs crackling on the broad, bounteous hearth. In the great common chamber, rafted and picturesque as an antique gothio hall, are warm hearts and flashing eyes. Bearded men and fair women are there laughing maidens, and strapping young hunters who have just shaken tho snow off their furs at the portals. Despite the stern yet mu sical baritone of the stinging wind as it goes by, stinging cheeks, biting noses into purple, and making the blood tin gle, shouts of mirth and laughter liso above the boreal blasts; and our leaping sleigh, gliding flying along rather to tho music of the soft musical bells, is fast approaching its terminus. " In the meantime," asks the reader, " who occupy this Bleign V I hasten to answer. First, there was your humble servant, the narrator, Dick Lonsdale by name, bnt a few months back from the banks' of the Isis, with the "bar" in prospect, my "governor " baviug a snug interest in the Iudia House. I add a few of my personal itemp. Rather good-looking (at least my wife says so), a fair shot, a stunning "stroke oar," can hit with wonderful vigor straight out from the shoulder, am five feet ten and grow ing, cau play tho fiddle, aud have tho temper of an nngel. I have been one of a party of adventurous sportsmen "going in" for something worthy of Alexander, and, with fishing tackle, spears, and "shooting-irons," had done no inconsiderable execution among the denizens of the Canadian woods and pounding "rapids," and hunted the bear in his own bold and picturesque fastnesses. Enough for myself. Now for my com panions. flace aux JJatnes, therefore; for, nestling by my sido, wrapped up in rugs and warm furs, is Lota d'Arville, a bright eyed, rosy lipped, laughing Cana diau, as lovely a girl-woman of seven teen as glance of man ever rested com placently upon. The Canadiau mother and the French father were expressed iu her name. Her playful lambent eyes had exercised their sorcery upon me ere this, and the modulations of a voice une qunled for its low, soft sweetness, completed the young siren's triumph. This, by the way, for we had exchanged no confidences as yet on a subject very near to my heart. We were bound to a merry sleighing party at Windy Gap farm ostensibly to a hunt upon a vast scale, which accounts for my two rifles and ammunition lying in the sleigh, and for the noble deer hound, our third companion, who had curled up his great body at our feet, and aided to keep them warm. I had known Lota's brother a yomg officer in the Canadian rifles had killed " bar" at the "salt-lieks" with him, had met the whole family on board a St. Lawrence steamer, and was now a guest at their house enjoying their frank and bounte ous hospitality. ' Hurrah I" Through the keen sonor ous' air sleigh and horses bounded along ! " Cling-clangl" go the chiming bells. " Crick-crack I" goes the long thonged whip, with a sharp, cheery significance. My " Madawaska Cari ole," a sleigh which is the perfection of locomotion, is not less perfection than the fiery steeds, with their sinews of elastic steel, which I drive. Driving the sleigh tandem is the easiest thing iu the world, when you are used to it. I was a member of the "Tandem club," and considered rather a crack hand. I exulted in my skill now, as I bore my rosy companion flying through the air, and the whip went " crick-crack " liko a double-barrel go ing r.ff, and the sweet bells sung and chimed. "Oh I sweet echoes of far distant wedding bells," I thought, and the crisp snow was split and shattered into diamond dust under the grinding of the hoofs and the attrition of the "runners," and with an exhilaration I could not repress, I gave a vigorous "Hurrah 1" which conveyed itself to Liota, wrapped up in moose and bear skins, and warm as a toast. A sweet, girlish laugh echoed my exulting shout. " Yon appear to enjoy this, Mr. Lons dale, sue said. "If I don't" "Crack-crack!' filled up the kiat ,s. What a pair of beauties. JtUioebus Apollo never drove the like down the steps of heaven t The wily Ithacan never " raised " such cattle when he cleared the stables of Rhesus of his horses. " Crick-crack I" and tho horses neigh and toss their arching necks, and the bells are chiming and tinkling, and tlie mad, exulting rush up lifts one like wine. I remark to myBelf that tho sky has deepened into an intense, still, darken iug blue darkening with a strange, un earthly, tenebrious inkiuess, betokening a coming snow storm. No matter. " Windy Gap " is right ahead, and the welcome lights will blaze out of the case, ments soon, for the afternoon is wearing On we go, but I do not seo them yet; and yet out no it s all right l "Are you warm quite snug, dear Lota 1" said I, half turning to look ut the rosy, exquisite face peeping forth with so much lurtive coquetry from its encaarement of white cozy furs. " Oh I so comfortable," she answered, with a nestliug movement, and a smile which, made my heart leap joyously up ward. But my attention was called away to the creeping, crepuscular inkiness of the sky. It was light, yet not daylight, but blue light to coin a word; that wintry hue of livid darkening steel, al ways tho precursor to a fierce change in the weather. This only made the long, level plains of snow gleam with a luster the more dazzling and intense. I re marked this, but with a momentarily di vided aud wavering sense. I had never (familiarly as we had grown, and I was " honest as the skin betweeu your brows," as she was in fact) I had never said " dear Lota" be fore, and the words were yet iu mine arj like a sweet old burden. I loved her with all my heart and sou), but I had never told it. I yearned to tell her so now; but I thought it scarcely fair, not up to the mark of my manhood, to take what seemed an unfair advantage of the protection I was supposed to extend over her. I magnanimously resolved to wait, choking down the words, but not for long. Meantimo "crick-crack " went the long whip, and still "cling-clang" went the chiming bells, and tho horses held on with unabated pace and splendid vigor, but where hud " Windy Gap " gone to all this time, for time was up, and we should bo there by this? "Gooduessl" exclaimed Lota, all at once, " how straugo tho sky looks ! we shall have more snow a heavy fall, too." "I fear so," I replied; "but, n'im pprte, we'll soon be out of it. " " We are very long, I fauey," she con tinued, reflectively; "you nave driven there quicker than this before. " Oil, Heaven 1" she cried, with the sudden ness of a revelation, " can we have lost tho track ?" Tho blank question warped with a horrible jar on my most vivid fears. Now or never was the time to bo cool. " No, I think not," I replied, with as sumed carelessness; "we shall come to our landmark presently." "A clump of fire an old mill, further on; "yes," she added, "I recollect. But we should have passed them loug ere this. Oh, I fear we are lost I" A cold chill seized mo as I tacitly ad mitted that she was in the right. I could not account for my error, i; such was the case. I looked round the hori zon, but beheld no friendly sign; it was only a circle gathering closer and darker the while. Suddenly my brave deer hound lifted up his head and uttered a low growl. The horses gave a startled swerve just as nuldenly. A (strange, lugubrious, but appalling sound came all at onoe from windward, wailing like a death cry a prolonged, awful, groan ing discordance over the white gleam ing snow; and then it died away. The horses halted trembling; only the shivering tinkle of the bells broke tho death silence that fell like au ecliuso over all. " What is that ?" asked Lota, in a shuddering whisper, as she clutched my arm. I listened. "It is the wind sighing and dying away in the pino forest," I answered. "Aud wo do not go near the forest," she sail. "Hark I there it is again. On, what what can it be i" Agaiu the indescribably hideous and lugubrious sound broke forth; clearer, nearer. It increased ; it multiplied; the horrible crescendo howling, shrieking and ravening was not that of the wind this time. " Mercif'il God !" gasped Lota; " the wolves!" I never understood till that moment what the concentrated essence of literal deadly horror might mean. I never ex periecoed the shock before or since; and I have in my hunting excursions faced my danger aud played out tho game, manfully. To have lost the way was terrible enough ; but the wolves and Lota 1 For an instant I was numb and dumb. It was trne, however. The severity of the weather, the migration or scar city of the animals on whom these un clean creatures preyed, had made their hunger a raging, devouring madness. They were encroaching on civilized ter ritory, and, losing their usual character istic and craven cowardice, were ap- Eroaching the habitations of men, aunting village and settlement. Woe to those in their path 1 As the infernal howl rose liugermgly again, the horses darted away with a shrill neigh of fear, and I guided them beginning to re cover myself in an opposite direction, while Terror, my noble hound, stood up with every fang bared aud every hair erect, waiting for tho enemy he had al ready scented. If my good horses had gone on so ad mirably at first, they sped off now like arrows from the bow, for the madness of fear added wings to their speed, as that of hunger did to the panting pursuers. I was growing cool. Lota was pale and calm. I felt proud of her, though it was certain if we escaped not speedily the brutes would run us down; and then, herror of horrors, what a fate for her I I had two rifles, a revolver, ammuni tion, a spear, and a wood-hatchet iu the sleigh. I conveyed my intention to Lota. " Can you load those weapons with those cartridges ?" I asked. "Yes," was the answer; and she load ed a " Fuller " and a " Manton " with true hunter's skill. I took one rifle, looked back, the pack was increasing. I fired and Lota loaded; and one after another fell, to be devoured by their ravenous comrades; nnd still the horses sped on. The accursed things were, for all thip, gaining ground. Doubts, fears, hopes, trembling, were at my heart as I turned to the swe; t girl whose life or death wore all to me, and said : " Lota! if we die together, remember that I loved yon none but you I I tell it to you now, if I may never again." "Kill me first," she whispered; "I hear your words I echo them. You have my my heart, Richard " " Oh, Lota, best beloved, what a mo ment to confess ! and I know not if I feel pain or gladness most." " There are no secrets between us," said Lota, smiling. "Take this rifle ; give me the pistol ; one kiss so ! they come. Save me from them at any cost." I thought my ears would have split at their dreadful yells, for they were now upon us, opening out to surround us ; and though the horses held bravely on, x dreaded every instant that sheer terror would paralyze them. It is scarcely iiossiblo to conceive the unutterable lorror that was circling us both: yung lovers with beating hearts for ever from that hour interchanged with each other. With lolling tongues, eves of flame. hoarse, deep growls, they had ceased to bay and howl ; they were closing in upon us. I remarked one huge monster in ad vance of the rest ; his object evidently being to leap into the sleigh from be hind. I fired aud missed him I The noxt moment his huge bulk came scram bling over the back ; his paws were on me ; his fiery breath on my cheek ; aud I expected, as I murmured a short prayer, to feel the fangs of the abhor rent brute in my flesh. A flash ? a crash ! a gush of blood and the crea ture tumbled backward, shot through the throat to the spine by my brave Lota ! Then I plied hatchet, aud split skull after skull, while the sleigh tore on ; but i was giving up all nope, and turning round oh, Heaven ! to spare my darling a moro hideous fate when shots and s-honts rang around, aud troous of dogs aud hunters cams swiftly to our aid aud we were saved ! Providence had directed the sleigh to " Windy Gap ;" our firing reached the ears of our friends, and brought them out in hot haste to aid us. We were saved 1 Aud as I bore her fainting form into tho hospital hall, and clasped her tenderly to my breast, you may guess how sincere was the gratitude 1 breathed in silence to Heaven. It was the prelude to a wedding. which occurred soon afterward; and you may be sure I never forgot my fight with the wolves, how pluckily my noble Lota backed me, or the somewhat origi nal but apropos mode in which I told my love. Geese as Practical Humorists. A goose has perhaps the keenest au- prociation of humor of any animal, un less it be her own arch enemy, the fox. The writer once saw in a little grassy paddock some eight or ten fat and healthy pigs and half a score of geese. From this paddock a narrow, open gate gave entrance into the farmyard, and as evening drew on, the geese ranged them selves in a row at this Thermopylae. Obviously, supper time was approach ing, aud the pigs wished to return homo to their troughs. Equally clearly, the geese had given each other the word not to let them pass through the gate which they guarded, without paying toll. First came up a jolly, good humored lit tle pig, who trotted cheerfully along with a confidence which ought to have disarmed criticism, till he came among the geese. Then, with a caokle and a scream, every neck was stretched to get a bite at him, and, squalling and yelling, the poor little porker run the gauntlet. The same fate befell six or seven more of his brethren in succession, each be traying increasing trepidation as he ap proached the fatal pass, and made a bolt through the geese, whose chattering and screeches of delight were almost indis tinguishable from human laughter. At last, the biggest pig of the party brought up the rear. He was a pink-fleshed, clean young fellow, with fat limbs and Bides, aud his ears were cocked, and his tail sharply twisted in the intelligent, wide-awake manner which so completely distinguishes the intellectual pig from the mere swine multitude. With a loud grunt of defiance, this brave beast charged through the nock of geese, and had actually almost gained the gate, when a large, gray goose made one grab at his fat ham, caught up the skin in a bunch, and gave it a tremendous pinch with her red beak. Needless to say, the air was rent with the squeals of agony of the injured pig and the ecstatio peeans of the flock of geese in chorus. From the order in which the transaction took place, we derive the impression that a similar game of prisoner's base probably formed the entertainment of the geese every evening. Au advocate of Colmar has left one hundred thousand francs to the local madhouse. " I got this money." sayj the candid lawyer in his will, " out of those who pass their lives in litigation ; in bequeathing it for the use of lunatics I only make restitution. " STUDYING HISTORY. UNlrpPKlna Drfrit mt the "Cnrthaslnlnnii" nnd the Final IHncomfltnre ! the "Ko. nans." Barnes, the schoolmaster in a suburban town, read in the Educalibnal Monthly that boys could be taught history better than in any other way by letting each boy in the class represent some historical character, and relate the acts of that character as if he had done them himself. This struck Barnes as a good idea, and he resolved to try it on. The school had then progressed so far in its study of the history of Rome as the Punio wars, and Mr. Barnes immediate ly divided the boys into two parties, one Romans and the other Carthaginians, and certain of the boys were named after the leaders upon both sides. The boys thought it was a big thing, and Barnes noticed that they were so anxious to get to the history lesson that they could hardly say their other lessons properly. When the time came, says Max Ade ler, Barnes ranged the Romans upon one side of the room and the Cartha ginians on the other. The recitation was very spirited, each party telling about its deeds with extraordinary unc tion. After a while Barnes asked a Ro man to describe the battle of Caunne. Whereupon the Romans heaved their copies of Wayland's " Moral Science " at the enemy. Then the Carthaginians made a battering ram out of a bench and jammed it among the Romans, who re taliated with a volley of books, slates and chewed paper balls. Barnes con cluded that the battle of Cannes had been sufficiently illustrated, and he tried to stop it; but the warriors consid ered it too good a thing to let drop, and accordingly the Carthaginians sailed over to the Romans with another batter ing ram and thumped a couple of them in the stomach. Then the Romans turned in and tho fight became general. A Carthaginian would grasp a Roman by the hair and hustle him around over the desks in a manner that was simply frightful to bo hold, and a Roman would give a fiend ish whoop and knock a Carthaginian over the head with Greenleaf's arith metic. Hannibal got the head of Scipio Africanns under his arm, and Scipio, in his efforts to break away, stumbled, and the two generals fell and had a rough-and-tumble fight under the blackboard. Caius Gracchus tackled Hamilcar with a ruler, and the latter in his struggles to get loose fell against the stove and knocked down about thirty feet of stove pipe. Thereupon the Romans made a grand rally, and in five minutes they ran the entire Carthaginian army out of the schoolroom and Barnes along with it, and then they locked the door and be gun to hunt up the apples and lunch in the desks of the enemy. After consuming the supplies they went to the windows and made dis agreeable remarks to the Carthaginians who were standing in the yard, and dared old Barnes to bring the foe once more into battle array. Then Barnes went for a policeman, and when he knocked at the door it was opened, and all tho Romans were found busy study ing iheir lessons. When Barnes came in with the defeated troops ho went for Scipio Africanus, and pulling him out of his seat by the ear, he thrashed that great military genius with a rattan until Scipio begun to cry, whereupon Barnes dropped him nnd begun to paddlo Caius Gracchus. Then things settled down iu tho old way, and next morning Barnes aunounced that history ia tho future would be studied as it always had been; and he wrote a note to the Educational Monthly to say that in his opinion th man who suggested the new system ought to bo led out and shot. The boys do not take as much interest in Roman history as they did on that day. A Merchant's Resting Place. The coffin in which A. T. Stewart was buried was of oak, covered with black silk velvet. The handles and mountings were of gold, and the liniug of white satin and fringe. The box in which the coffin was inclosed to preserve it from decay was of cedar, lined with lead two inches thick. The plate reads as fol lows: "Alexander T. Stewart. Boru October 12, 1803. Died April 10, 1876." St. Mark's churchyard, in which the remains of the dead merchant are interred in the family vault, is at Second avenue and Tenth street. It is one of a number covered with marble slabs and surrounded by an iron fence. It is in the center of the third row, look ing some whit neglected, and bearing these words: "No. 112, A. T. Stewart's family vault." The vault is ten feet deep, and 12x25 feet, superficial meas urement. The only other body in it is that of Miss Clinch, a niece of Mrs. Stewart. Blind, but Not Helpless, A Massachusetts paper says that some three miles fro u Westminster village, that State, and about half a mile from any other house, an old lady has lived entirely alone for more than fifteen years. She is eighty-three years of ago, and wholly blind; yet she builds her own fire in an old fashioned fireplace, makes her tea, and manages to prepare her meals and do tho general work about tho house. A neighbor carries her a loaf of bread occasionally, chops her wood, and maintains a distant over sight of her affairs, but for the most part she does her own work. Slie owns a valuable timber lot and somo other real estate, but prefers to live alone in her darkness and old age rather than pay to be taken care of. Such a Mystery. A college professor tells the following : "During tho after dinner talk the rough specimen for whom I was sur veying remarked that mathematics had always seemed a very wonderful thing to him. Thinking to interest him some what, I began to illustrate some of the wonders ; among other, tried to show him the way in which Neptune was dis covered. After some twenty minutes of elaborate explanation I was somewhat taken aback to hear him say : Yes, yes; it is very wonderful, very; but' (with a sigh) there's another thing that's alters troubled me', and that is, why you have to carry one for evory ton ; but if you don't, 'twon't come out right.'" Fashion Nolo. A new style of finger ring has three narrow bars of gold, one set with small diamonds, one with pearls, and one with turquoises. The Shepherdess is one of the favorite shapes for hats this spring. It has a ronnd crown, the brim droops back and front and turns up slightly on the side. ' The pockets of the short plaid busi ness and walking coats for gentlemen are cut of the same goods as the coat, and are stitched on the outside of the coat. Light summer cashmeres, in all deli cate shades, are to be used for polo naises, or overskirts aud corsages', over black velvet skirts for afternoon house dresses. Combination of light blue Bilk aud dark blue velvet, and light green silk and dark green velvet, are used for trim ming hats. The. silk is almost white and the velvet almost black. A very pretty wrapper is made of blue foulard, with a wntteau plait in the back, with two ruffles embroidered in white around the bottom of the skirt. The collar and cuffs are embroidered in the same manner. An elegant mourning necklace and pendant has the necklace made of small squares of jet, joined with gold links. In each square of jet is set a large and brilliant diamond. The pendant is joined to the necklace by gold work. A street suit for a little girl of five years consists of a kilt plaited skirt of light brown camel's hair plaid, with three rows of small crochet buttons up the front. Tho sack is very long aud has also three rows of buttons. With this suit comes a hood made of Valen ciennes lace and white swiss, trimmed with brown ribbons. One of the handsomest suits seen at the New York spring openings had tho back of the basque and the outer seams of the coat sleeves laced up with silk cord. The front of the basque was fast ened, invisibly, with hooks and eyes, while bows of ribbon were placed along the front which simulated a double cord ing. A very handsome dolman is made of ecru-colored cashmere entirely covered with braiding of the same color, and two rows of gathered ecru lace around the edge, and a lace jabot around the front. Two standing rows of lace are around the neck. In the back, where the sleeves are formed, are two ribbon bows. An odd suit for a boy has the knee breeches made of blue flannel, with a strip of chamois on the outer seams ; on this strip at either knee are six gold buttons. The vest ia of chamois, and has gold buttons. Tho jacket is made of the flannel with the turn-down collar, revers, and culls of chamois, ornamented with gold buttons. An elegant wrapper is made of white swiss muslin, with a watteau bock. The wrapper has a deep Spanish flounce at the bottom, having for its edge, first deep Valenciennes lace, then a row of embroidered swiss insertion, and last a row of lace insertion. A broad lace in sertion attaches the flounce to the skirt of the wrapper. Up the front is a broad wiss embroidered insertion, with lace on either side. The bame runs up the outer seam of the sleeve. The neck and sleeves have a fall of lace. Around the sleeves and on the top of tho watteau plait are ribbon bows. A German Yiew of Niagara Falls. Mr. George F. Hine, of Syracuse, who is completing his studies in Leipzic, met with a somewhat singular descrip tion of America's great waterfall, and oommunicates it to friends at home. He writes: I was in a bookstore the other even ing, and I picked up an English reader, which is used very extensively in the schools here for the study of English; and I was so much amused over the fol lowing description, that I copied it and thought I would send it to you. The reader has passed through its eighth edition : " THE-CATARACX OF NIAGARA. "This amazing fall of water is made by the river St. Laurence in its passage from Lake Erie into the Lake Ontario. The river St. Laurence is one of the largest rivers in the world; and yet the wnoie oi its waters is discharged into this place, by a fall of one hundred and fifty feet perpendicular. It is not easy to bring tho imagination to correspond to the greatness of the scene. A river extremely deep and rapid, and serves to drain the waters almost of all North America into the Atlantio ocean, is here poured precipitately down a ledge of rocks, that rises, like a wall, across the whole bed of its stream. The river a little above, is near three-quarters of a mile broad; and the rocks where it grows narrower are four hundred yards over. Their direction is not straight across, but hollowing inside like a horse-shoe; bo that the cataract, which bends to the shape of the obstacle, rounding inwards, presents a kind of theater, the most tre mendous iu nature. Just in the middle of this circular wall of waters, a little island, that has braved the fury of the current, presents one of its points, and divides the stream at top into two parts; but they unite again before they reach the bottom. The noise of the fall is heard at the distance of several leagues; and the fury of the waters at the termi nation of their fall is inconceivable. The dashing produces a mitt that rises to the very clouds, and which forms a most beautiful rainbow, when the sun shines. It will be readily supposed that such a cataract entirely destroys tho navigation of the stream; and yet some Indians in their canoes, as it is said, have ventured down it with safety." That Animal. A short time ago, at a school, during a lesson on the animal kingdom, the teacher put the following question: " Can any boy name to me an animal of the order edentata, that is, a front-tooth toothless antmal ?" A boy (whose face beamed with pleas ure at the prospect of a good mark) re plied: "I oau." "Well, what is the animal t" asked the teacher. " My grandmother," replied the boy, with great glee. The Young Attorney. The Detroit Free Presn thus describes a youngster whocame to that place from Boston to bo a lawyer: It was amusing how quickly that boy picked up a knowledge of legal busi ness. It was his duty to stay in the office when the lawyer went out, and he felt all tho importance of his position. When big boys came around to ask for a job of carrying up coal Thomas went for them heavy. " Boy I he would answer in a severe voice, " I don't want to sse you come to grief, but if you don't hurry right down stairs I'll get out a capias, switch you behind the bars aud have you hung be fore grass starts !" The attorney had to go to Chicago one day, and he told Thomas that he might wash tho windows and slick up a little, Thomas went in. He had new matting put ou the floor, put a painter at work and hired an old woman to wash every thing which could be washed. It was a neat job all around, and he felt as if he onght to be praised for his enterprise. The attorney begun to scold, but Thomas remarked : " Aiu't we as good as those one-horse lawyers across the road f Is a law office a barn or is it a law office ?" Two weeks ago he was told to go-down and order half a ton of coal to keep the stove going till warm weather. Somo one told him the coal would be consid erably higher next year, and so, on the ground of economy, he ordered five tons sent up, and most of it had been dump ed on tho walk before the attorney dis covered the situation. Thomas would probably have lasted a week or so longer than he did, but for his reception of a lady client who came to see the lawyer about applying for a divorce. . The law yer was trying the case in court, and the boy had sole charge of tho office. He received the lady in his usupI urbane manner, aud when she inquired for the attorney, he replied: " He is out, but my legal services are at your disposal." She didn't seem inclined to consult him, and he went on: " Is it a case of wife beating or di vorce ?" She intimated that he was an impu dent boy, and he replied : " Very well, madam, we can't take your case at all." She 6aid she'd call and see the lawyer, but Thomas answered: " It won't do you any good. Wo can't take your case at all not for love or money." She returned two hours later, when the lawyer was in and Thomas was out, and it was decided that the boy would have to seek some other profession. That evening, when so informed, he re plied : "All right. If I'm going to bo a law yer I want things to git up and git around. You don't want a lively boy around here, and I saw that over a week ago." It was intimated th the hadn t better "sass" any one, and he blandly re plied: " No one is sassing you. If yon want this partnership dissolved we'll part friendly, if you don t want to rush things this is no place frr me." He is peddling peanuts now, and the way ho dusts around is the cause of his having half a dozen fights per day. Hotel Lifo in the City of Mexico. Everything in the way of living, writes a correspondent, is cheap in Mexico, K)l course prices range higher in the capital than elsewhere, but even there the prices are much lower than with us. The hotels for instance, furnish excellent rooms at from $20 to $50 a month. At the Hotel Iturbido the rooms are very large, and usnually di vided by curtains, so as to make a parlor and a bedroom. The arrangement is a pleasant one, and preferable to having two rooms. Jt or thirty dollars a month you can procure one of those apart ments, handsomely furnished and efficiently attended. The scheme of the hotel extends no further. Your bath and your meals are outside affairs. On the ground floor of the Hotel Iturbide is an excellent French restaurant and a very good bath house. Theso are separate establishments. The price of the bath is two reals, twenty-five cents, and at the restaurant two persons can contract for meals at $7,50 each per week. Of course there are other restau rants, and of one, the Grand Tivoli, I can speak safely in terms of unbounded praise. It is arranged as a park, with lovely grounds, fountains, streams and flowers in profusion. In the city dining places are scattered about here aud there ; Chinese pagodas, Swiss chalets, French cottages in minia tureyou choose the retreat which pleases you most. It is here that you nnd the great tree, on one of whose branches is a pretty little cabin, to which you ascend by a spiral stairway, if you prefer dining so far from mother earth. I believe it will be conceded by all who havo partaken of the menu of the Grand Tivoli that a better cooked, better served and more elegantly ap pointed dinner could hardly be found anywhere in the world. . The cooks are of the finest Paris schools, the wines genuine and the accessories simply fasci nating. Goloid Silver Coin. The bill introduced by Senator Wal lace iu the United States Senate to pro vide lor the coinage or goloid silver coin provides for one dollar, half-dollar and quarter-dollar pieces, bearing the in scription of goloid silver. The dollar is to contain nine and three-tenths grains of pure gold and 229 grains of pure silver, and the subsidiary coins in proportion. The new coins are to be legal tender for all payments except cus tom duties and the interest on the pub lio debt. Finally, the bill provides that Mr. Wheeler Hubbell, the inventor of the metal, shall be allowed a royalty of one-tenth of one per cent. The bill asserts that the combination will reduce the size and weight and inoreese the utility and value of the nation's coius. The grand lodge of Good Templars of Maine met in annual session at iSath. There are nov two hundred subordinate) lodges in operk Jon, with a membership of 15,500, an increase of 2,000 during tne year. My Heart Is Thine. When spring's first violet on the gale Her tender perfume flings ; When, deep In some sequestered va'o, The thrush his love tale firgs ; When all bright things of earth and tly Iu hymns of praiee oorabine One song, one prayer, alone breathe I s " Svcot love, wilt thou be mine ?" When from the woodland Btill and lone, Through the long summer night, Sad rhilomel's impassioned tone Thrills with love's deep delight ; When, steeped in balmiest breath of June The earth seems half divino, No ohange know I In wordj or tune, But sing ! " Wilt thou be mine V" When autumn's red andantnmn'a gold Faint wood and wold and hill ; When winter nights grow drear and cold, Love, I am ohangeless still. Though violets wither, roes fado, Love's calondar and mine JtUrk summer still in sun and shade, Aud still my heart Is thino 1 Items of Interest. Oregon produced 250,000 cases of can ned salmon last year. Latest from tho Black Hills" Send me money to get home with." Dr. Mudd, who set the shattered leg of J. Wilkes Boot h, has been re elected to the Maryland Senate. The hens of France are said to earn their owners $80,000,000 a year, and their motto is eggs-sell-sior. It is the crowd of f 00I3 . who rush to the Black Hills. It is the army of wiso men who rush for home again. When a loafer enters the sanctum of a busy editor, and the editor says: " Glad to see you're back," what docs he mean J When a rich man becomes poor it is but just that ho should be cut by nil poor acquaintances who clung to him in better days. Tho March cointrgo of the San Fran cisco mint amonuted to $3,308,000, agaiust $2,542,000 in the corresonding month of last year. Horace Greeley once said that the day a ouug man finds oat how he can get a dollar without honestly earning it, is the worst day he ever saw. A child can pick up a good deal of in formation if it will keep its ears open while its mother is conversing through a knothole in the fence with the woman next door. A bull rushed into a millinery shop, causing a stampede among the ladies present. The woman in charge drove the bovine gentleman out by exhibiting the price of a spring bonnet. The king of Burmah is to have a jour nal. He will be the proprietor himself, and in the prospectus he says that all his subjects who do not subscribe will be instantly killed. His inducements are even more powerful than a gift chromo. One of Weston's competitors in a walking match iu England was a man of the name of Martin, who had his skull trepanned after the battle of Inkermann, his breastbone and several ribs 6et after the storming of Redan, and a bullet taken out of his right leg during the Indian mutiny, Iu consequence of the wound in his head ho in subject to epi leptic fits, nnd he was seized in this man ner during his match with Weston. The Journal des ficbats publishes what may be considered an official state ment to the effect that tho number of persons undergoing penal servitude or simple imprisonment in France for of fenses connected with the commune does not exceed 1,500. Those who are under sentence of penal servitude are serving their time at the prison of Landcrnau, in Brittany, and the others are under confinement at Thouars and Belle-Isle. A lumberman at work on the head quarters of the Cache la Poudre was slightly surprised the other day when a big mountain lion sprung from a covert and landed squarely on his back. Luckily for the man, he had thrown his overcoat loosely over his shoulders, and it was pulled off by the beast, which evidently thinking its owner was under, made carpet rags of it in a moment. But while he was doing this the lumber man made very quick time toward camp, and escaped. A gentleman out of the kindness of his heart asked a dozen email boys to take a walk iu the field ono pleasant sum mer day. But when he was ready to re turn home they began to get weary, and he took the smallest boy on his back. Then they all cried to be carried in the same way. lie then resorted to nn in genious experiment. " 1 11 get horses for us all," and jumping into a hedge, be cut small wand3 for ponies for the little fellows, and a great stake as a charger for himself, which put mettle into their little legp, and they all rode cheerily home. The inhabitants of the little village of Haselmere, England, were somewhat startled by a woman named Vincent, who bad nn impression that she must oner up a Scriptural sacrifice. Seizing a cat she decapitated it with a hatchet. Im mediately afterward she cut off her left hand with the samp instrument, because, as she said, it had offended her. When Bhe had severed it at tho wrist, nil but a small piece of skin, she ran about with it dangling. A surgeon was Bent for who arrested the hemorrhage and made a proper amputation. Next day she was removed to an asvlum, where she still continues to madly rave about Scrip ture. Hepworth Dixon tells a story of bri gandage in California twenty years ago. Senati was the leader of a predatory band, and Moreno was his nrst lieuten ant. Los Angeles was the place of their chief exploits, the most audacious of which was to plunder several houses, murder a marshal, and carry off several Mexican girls. A reward of 81,500 was offered for Senati's body, dead or alive, and that was enough to make Moreno disloyal to his chief. He shot Senati, put his body in a cart, diew it to I Los Angeles, got the reward, and; claimed that bo had been a prisoner with the bandits, not a companion. The truth came out, however, and Moreno was sut to prison for fourteen ytars.