II H.H.. FBAZIFLR, Publisher. VOLUME 11. guointo gitedoq. JOHN BEAUMONT, WOOL canntrt, Oath Presser. sad Idartnhetaxer, at the cdd stand !mown as &MON Cantina. Machine. Tema made Novo what the watt Is tootle )t, J coup. 11 art 1 663. • Dn. G. Z. DBIOCK, PYISICIAN and SURGEON E, MONTROS Pe. Ms o IEI street. onsessite the arroesacez Minos. Boards at !eerie'. : one. Montrose, Ferrous Mh,1%5.-typ C. ?L CRANDALL, 1111 - AITIVACrIttRER orLlnen-wheela, Wool.wbeelo. Wheel. ILL twat* Clotk-roola, ke atc. Wood-oangtor ttone to order. d In the neatest mama. lumina pad Sh Wheel Factory lo &Ayres' Yourdry Banding, tip Calm =Owe, January SOth, 186.1-11 R S. BENTLEY, JR, NOTARY PUBLIC, MONT ROBE. nn KES Ackhowledgmeat of Dm* Mortimer, ka. for. any Errte In the Melted States. Preston 'Vouchers red ray Cer- Mfailes ,corn eled.red before him do not merle, the certificate °file Clerk of the calm Montrose, Jen. 4, IbM, CHARLES HOLES, riaguaca nr CLOCKS, WATCHES, AND JEWELRY Repstring done at mai, Short nut. romonsble Onus Shop on Con aide Public Avon. In F. B. Chnndler's boon. Mont :vet. Fa.. Bow. 7.1961. Dn. B. L. HA.NDRICK, L„FT,..... and 81:1 &OXON, respectfully tenders his prof% elooal wote= to the citirens of rdendsville uid eldnlly. ,02. In die oftles of Dr. Legit. Boards at J. Ficaforda. Fileudeville. July 97. 1864.-tf E. W. SMITH, AITORSEY it 00IINISELLOR AT LAW and Licensed Claim Azert °ace crvez L. Drag ocar. suvuenanna Depot Jarman 23. 1854. H. BU RRITT, D NAL= tet ata i g ua t Taacy EWA% CrilebA7zll.ll. (A ron I 134 :Ana OW. an Pea,. Baa nd oes, Hats red (Apo, sruk Snlalo 'am (le d ixerles, sProaisi aSh loaA AA • N.. /Mord. R. Axil 11„ 1864.-11 H. SAYRE & BROTHERS, AIiIVFACITITEMIS of litllezallnia, Coatings of all thada Stamm, Tb and Snout Iron Warr, Agricultural Implements. an Dealcn In Dry Gooda.Orxerlea, CrouturY. Montrose, Pa., February 51,1804. BLLLINOS STROUD, ..... e s rums LI) LINZ /ABU E AGENT. Oft" In Lath. r mem building, eest and of 11 Block. 111 Us atroanco, but. bees at the „glee ill be by C. L. Brown. Id on an... February 1,1664 . —t[ J. D. VAIL, M. D., • ifrOXIMPATEI2O PHYSICLIB, has permanently losattO himself to Montrose, Pa. whets be will promptly attend to 111 calls in his profeallon notn , Shop on. the Kethrklian Chard, llonrrnoe. P. 3.0017 1. 1864.-tf Ds. JOHN `F. COBB, reavnuomtaxed SURGEON, respectfully tenders Masorete. to tee Miter. of Susquehanna County. Haulm[ had shout ■ oreser erperlenor in the United SLUG, Are,. as Surgeon, especla) attention will he elver to SU it.GICA L OP 6.II.ATIONb. HP - Malden= on Maple Street, Ent e,f S. Tarhell's Hotel. MOrarcee, Beau. County, Pa., June 21.1W.9.-tf DR. WILLIAM W. SMITH, • SURGEON DENTIST. Office over the Banklng .1116 011 Ice of Cooper-A Co. All Dental Operstlon will be performed lo hie turoalgood etyle end Irerranta.d. Remember. °Mee formerly of R. Smith &Soo. kiMnrcse, Jamukry 1, 1884„—tf E. J. ROGERS, itrANUFAU 0 RER of all descriptions of WAG LIR ONS, CARRIAGES. SLEIGHS, /to., In the being:Ole of Wwlroooodtip and of the best materials, at the well mown =rid of E. 11. ROGERS, a few rods east of Searle'. Hotel in Montrose, where he will he happy to re ceivt the calls of AD who smut anything in his Una Montrose. June 1.1E43.-tf BALDWIN & ALLEN, CALLERS to PLOITEI, Salt, Pork, Isiah, Lard. Groin. Feed D thmdles. Mover and Timothy Reed. Also GROCERIE.S. raf,h as Swan, Molures, Syrups, Tea and Coffee. West side ed Public Avenue, one door below J. Etheridge. Montrose, January L 1664.-tf DR. G. W. BEACH, PHYSU7AN AND SURGEON, having pennonently tented never nt. Brooklyn Getter. Pm.. tendon Ws profeaddOnal SET rem to we attune of kluseplehnuns County. on to ma mammon,. ate with the time& CM:caplet the offee of the hte De. B. Rehard aon. aNI hosed. at EDI. Itichardeolis. necklet Omit?. Pt— June 11.1904.47 F. B. WEEKS, DRACTIOLI, BOOT AND SHOE ILLKEZI3; biro Dealer It A Boot., Sham Leather. and Shoe Finer. ne. Repairing dm. CB, neameas arid dlamdeb. Two doom above Searles lute. Montrose, Jammyy L, 1884.-Lt JOSEPH RICE, NtA NITTA OTIYESR and DEALER In CIURF Bedsteads, aad l.'s blues W. 6hop tour milts caw of New =ford Bonne, Rev Milford. October 1,1661-0 DEA PATifiCE. & GARDNER, TSICLANB MAD SURGEONS, will attend tslttesdly and IL Punctually to allbutneutbst may be eat:mated to thell eate. termscommeucarate arab Me time, Diseases mad deformlLl. or the ". Botgittl , tperationa,tmd all Beretta Dblesaes parttco. aril. attended to. Ofene over Webb's Btore. Mice bour.from Ba. et to a p. tn. E. PATRICIK. Jr.. IL out:mm.l.l:w 1. 1811L-tt E. L. GARDNER. Wit. & Whi. H. JESStI', A TTORICATB AT LAW, Warw.. P. Practice tr Itootroec. Pa. J l Su GA hums. Bradfo anuary Idrd. Wayne, Ma. , Wyoming and Lonerne Counties. ALBERT CHAMBERLIN, nLSTILIOT ATTORNICY AND ATTORNEY AT LAW.- ", Otace over the Store f wraerly occupied 1.7 Pod Brot Montrose, Ps-January 1, 1.860. J. LYONS & SON, IS&LEB.9 IN DRY 410011 S. GroorrimOroelrery, Hardware l'inwure, Boots, Melodeons, Pianos, and all kinds of Susi c.: tantrum:lents. Sheet &taste, &o. Also carry o the Book Bind Me bonne -111n all 11a brand - As. s . Liall34, Slontxuse, J,mary 1, ISI4. =xi ABEL TURRELL, DPALEN IN DIMJGS. eIINDICINM GIIEMICALB, Palma, 011 s. Dye-stun, Varnishes. 'Window Giros. Liaeore, Grocerien. Crockery. Olearmire, WWI-Paper. Jew s In% Fancy Goode, Psrfomery, Bergh: al Instrutoeuts. CIoaA Grog" Agent tor all of the moat_ popte ler Patent liscllcinea. Montrose, Jima., I, IPM. C. 0. FORDLIAM, ILFAIMPACITURER.of BOOTS SHOE% Sfoarrooo, Pa. „In. Shop over DeiViit & 401 V. All kinds of work inntle order. and zepablog (Wm natty. Work &me tam wain. Wed. 11f:stir... Awn 2.1661.-tf CHARLES N. sToODARD, DIALER in BOOTS .1k SHOW, Le we,.aa plod. N. l t n ir'nest eni r, l: 4 l.'n'onter d .'S'n e d idoutrnse. No.. liamnbcr id. 1660. B. IL LYONS .& CO., DMILLERS InDRY GOODS.BROD - BEIM Boon. Ruovs. Late' 004 m, Comma, 011 olotha, Wall and Wine.. Pa pet. Paints. OVA tic More oo the out dile of Palle Avant. •1. LiOda, • • • • J. D. LTODZ. • Blinantoe.Jeatory 1. 16454.-tf READ, WATROUS, & FOSTER,'" EALIfEtI IN DRY nOODS. Efedidnee. Pout!, OM D Ottctuitt. Hereva e, atockery. Don. Clocks, Watcher, Jew. girt. Sayer Spoons. Perfumery. it, Beek Block. Mootrote. E.O.FOITZIO 110 ;;;e. January 1. ISO. • PHILANDER LERE.S, VASRION4BLE TAILOR.. Brick Block, crn& asso,l Warn. & Postorla Store. Moutrore, F. liuutrove, Pa., July 21, 1660. JOHN GROVES, VAIMIoNARLIS TILOR. fillop oppOlaillbe Ttrinb -2: liCul Liteal9 Printing Wine. I - *annum. Pa" October 23, 1633.42 D.A.LYONS, nutaza Dr! 41[1041. Chocarles, ClOCkern Sore= Mit *reek ...9.h.ros Dm* frabiman' , . . . . , . . , r ' • -. 1 .. . :. , _ . ,!. . . _.,. , , 'lr" -...' ;, ' 7 "< 7. .. ' ! • . . , . , . . :I. , \ 1., . l I• ... 1 :; , ; . : , :f1 : 75,_ ~., .„ .... . . .—.l . . . :.. • • - ''''.'' .1 . . '. -' ; . , '''''''- '',, . ~..T•nr: ; 1 .." r , . 9 " M il . ' ;' ,4 ',. . t . . .. ' . ae n ' ''' 'l e lll 4?) .'‘ :. ~ S .:.' l. 7 -' ' 11 -of (. I rit + ~ t , ~ ..„....,...„__...,,...„:„.„„.,....,,..,_„.:. ~. TO BE BEAD TN STYE MENTITES. Moonlight evening—shady grove— Two young people much love; Heroine with groit wealth endowed, Hero handsome, poor, proud Truth eternal--hearts united— Vows ar ratelees passion plighted; EiEOCS---quarrele—sighs—caresses, Malden yields one ot bee tresses; Obstacles to be surniounted, Happy hours pass by uncounted,. Ugly rival, old and stale, Overhears thcktender talc Morning in the East looks ruddy; Beene—Young lady's father's study Hero, with his bat In band Comes her ditto to demand; Angry parent storms—abases— And at once consent, refuses; Malden faints beneath the blow— Mother Internedm—Mo go; ehrieks—hysterice—protestations, Mixed with old man's execrations, Exit lover midst the din— Ugly rival enters In. VOL. ILL Time—A moonlight night once more, Scene—Outside the lady's door, Lover, with half broken heart, Swears he'd rather die than part. Garden—flowet—umbnignous shade— Vanly accents—ee.renade. Chamber window opens wide— Debut of expectant bride; Little dog most kindly mato— Tears—rope-ladder—llight—pnrault-- Gallant steeds—toolate—night's semen— Triumph—mania '—Grenta Green. (aid rhea's Mown" forever— Ugly rival—scarlet fever. ()Id man slekly--sends for child— All forgiven—reconciled; Young man making money fast— Old man's blessing--dtes at last. Youthful couple move probate— Get the money—live In state— Family mansion—jewels, plate. Mother's wishes crowned with Joy— Doctors—nurses—little boy. Time proceeds—heir ties endear— Olive branches year by year. Bleesinp on the good attend— General gladness—moral end. One would not guess they bad ever a difference In their Brea, Just to see Mr. and Mrs Puffer jogging along comfortably together in the same straight. backed green wag,on,drawn bythe same pumpkin-sad milk horse which took them home on the first day of their honey-moon ; or, if not the very same horse, one precisely like it. Neither wOuld one think it to see them of a Sunday—he In skftblue swallow-tidied coat, and she In her invisible green satin bonnet, sailing off like a tugboat towing a fail-rigged schoon er, be being exceedingly spare, and she being ex ceedingly portly. And yet they once came as near dissolving Into twain again as one flesh ever did. No one knows of it, however, except Counselor Sabin and I ; and now, if I tell it to you, you are by no means to re peat the story. Long and long before Mn'. Puffer was a fluffy old woman in caps toad spectacles, when she was It, stead a plump, apple-faced girl, with eyes the color of whertleberries and skin the color of milk, she had a way of taking to the youths of her acquaintance— s way of which, I discover, she and her coevals by no means secured the monopoly; for truly as I write I see, nndtr the elm tree by my window, a maiden, in a line of descent foil two generations later, standing idly enough swinging, 'her parasol to and fro, and smiling up from under the green ribone of her joeky as Innocent and artless as a damask rose; and 1 know, as sure as can be, that every careless wave and motion is to that boy beside her— , a being' with hair parted behind, shining with oil, and with uo beard worth naming—as the twisting-of a spider's web around a tender-hearted fly. But I do not pity his wtakticsa In letting a bit of blue-eyed calico sway him back and forth as lightly as she does her spotted-handled parasol, because I know they are only playing at a game of tee-saw, and years hence Master will be up and Miss will be down. Then it will be my lady's turn to fetch and carry, while she believes a tender word and smile makes amend for everything. "Punctured by pine and tortured by fears," yet I rejoice in hie panes and doubts, for the lime is brief enough. ru warrant me that be plays the mouse and she the cat in' their story. So also lam glad in my heart for every prick and torment the whortle berries and milk wrought upon Puffer's callow heart while he was away back In spencers and soap-locks; because I am positive it was alone of his man's des postisnt and love of self that I have this story to tell. - There came a time Of course when, having carded and span and wove her twelve dozen of everything after the manner of olden time princesses, this plump, white-faced girl, dressed in muslin, heavily embroidered by her own crafty fingers, and further decorated by a wreath of apple-buds and wild myrtle apon her Lair—which was of itself like a whole bush of whortleberriers—in the presence of admiring wit nesses, was made Mistress Puffer by a dignified, venerable clergyman, who lived in the times when ministers were Mat men Thus her marriage had the grace and good omen of being a ceremony _in which solemity and sanctity impressively mingled. And Mrs. Grundy, who by no means confines her self to camp and court, affirms there never bad been a wedding in Northumberland which promised better; though the wretch took core to add, with a hypo critical sigh, thatgtlliNd beginnings make sometimes sorriest endings, 'Me wretch was right too, as she frequently Is In a measure, for of a truth th e heaviest tempests sometimes come convoyed by remarkably bright mornings, The mother of mischief Is no bigger than a midge's wing; and let me, who am an old bird, tell you, young aspirants after the holy sacrament of matrimony, a little secret worth a dozen of love powders and magic potions. Never for any con sideration, as you value your domestic mate by word, look or gesture, that the lord of you —modest man—is, may, can, mud, or will be in the sarong upon any,pnasible OCCaSiOII. Believe hearti ly in the perfection of his attributes if you are able to . ; such annihilation of your judgment and common sense will make you more comfortable, doubtless, although it is not totally essential. Appearance, howeihr, if not the reality, most certainly is ; there fore, in either event,..dic and give no sign. Uolor ttmately for Mistress Puffer, but fortunately for the story, she lived too long aro to have the benefit of my large experience and ready benevolence, and so of her own knowledge she must find'. SI/rings 'and summers and autumns and winters have followed one another in monotonous level each bearing its burdens of cares and labors; house cleaning and planting; butter and bay-making, har vesting and fruit-drying, sledding and sewing; then the same ro'md of toilsome duties over again, until Mistress Puffer was o Wife of en many years that she had long answered to her matronly vame with no more Washings and sweet shyness, than though she bad been born to it; until she Went on making her Soap and cider apple-sauce with aedateness and unc tion es it she . had always regarded there common places the destined sPhere and elected end of wo man, (as may be she had,) and as If she had never, no, never; in her wildest days, gone from her cham ber to ajnerrynoiking by way of window and ,shed roof Instead of the stairs; being, you see, too gen erous tO disappoint hgr fellows, and ton thoughtful to run any risk of disturbing the repose of her pa. rents, wino, themseites no longer young, had a straight-aced notion that everybody ought to be sleepy by nine o'clock. ' Bat all this tithe while she vas growing matter-of fact and portly, in the midst of the battings and brewings, the washings and mitchinge, a little cloud no bigger than a mans hand had arisen In her hor rizon, and Was einsily uverepreadlim the zenith. At least not much bigger; to be explicit, it was just the size and took the form of a milk pail. "1' with husband, you would not milk in the strainer mil. I don't think It 18 a neat practice, W eems dirt is liable to get.into the stmlner in that way Besides, it isn't necessary; you can milk in the other pall and pour Into Mitt,' ast ad well for aught eee," said Mistress Puffer. . Possibly Mistress P. had a fault so, it was the fault of saying too much. 00 the other band, pos sibly Mr. P. ad a fault; if so, It was the fault of sayfng too little. One might think that, virtu the case of the distinguished eaters, Jack Sprat and his wife, these oppoeme, imperfections would }prove ID ightily harmonloos4wtheir tneetino; but not so. Talicing too little Is the twain, though lees op pressively tiresome, I think ,fraught more heavily with evil; for if one trill not speak how is onto know wherein and wtiereforo an offense Daises ' and basks to make due apology and reparation? Bo while the; talking partner is rattling on in all in nocennccee,, tho silent partner is brooding over some nn allp of the tincomadons tongue. Thus his wife had, no means of knowing whether ornot 31ePuifer haft soy reason Pr preferring to ilk in thestndnerguill. Pc y he had • one wigcb ovXI Wm+t impliccint exitck tOp 134 . 44, who Ira A NOVEL EME ME! ECM —London river. ALMOST DIVORCE]) Alas how easily things go wiong" " Freedom and Right against t , 3lavery and Wrong." MONTROSE, SUSQ. CO., PA., T UESDAY, APRIL 11, 1865. by no means an unreasonable dame. But being,. like his fellow-beards, mightily autocratic, he con sidered his, doing It should be sufficient proof of the-desirableness of the thing; although, being, like them, also fallible, this was hot always a test; and the, dame, who was a woman of common feminine sagacity—l claim no more—knew it. Therefore the pall came In nest evening bearing the what unmistakable indications of having been within the forbidden palings of the stable: but not accompanied by the grace of a simple apology, which so casity—especially wcmaanward —covert', like charity, a multitude of shrs. Now von and I know that if Mistre s s Puffer had not attained to a sufficient degree of sanctification so that she took he offending pall with a heart as serene as summer orning, as toubtleas washer bounden duty, yet she o S ht most surely to have taken it with a saintly smi e, °Jetty to bare done the hest she could toward inalailbad better with a cold strainer. lint you remember her besetting fault was an overflow of words, so, not,content with having entered a re monstrance, .she must need cuttr another. Still Na apology or reply, but a look of stolid indifference upon the countenance of her legal head, which pre sented as much expression as a pair of tongs or an iron-table. So, detecting no sign of attention, the dame added l ine upon line and precept upon pre cept, until at last the legal brad getting exasperated out of his defensive and offensive silonoo—as you have sci•n Musquitoos drive a dog from his corner —opened his mouth, and, In a voice no smoother than oil, spoke to the elicit that a milk-pall wan a small matter to waste so much breath and feeling upon. The tone more than the wo-tia, came like a dividing-knife upon Mistress Pu ffe r's last sentence, leaving one-half forever unsaid, and the other halt, which would bear dwelling upon and repetition no better than any other was stings, constantly ring ing In her cars. She left sini•what blameworthy and sell-disgusted for it is rare indeed that any act shows oat quite without a flaw ro the actor, when in stern and conscientious review: but neither did She love her husband very much for half a day. Al , ! what, Indeed, in a milk-pail to waste feeling upon! What, in Itself considered, was the tilt of fruit plucked and eaten In the Garden centuries ago. For my own part I must say I never saw any in consistency in the quarrel of children over a grass hopper as sufficient ttret cause for the Shawnee and Delaware tribes meeting in deadly combat that is, if any object is worth fighting for. It Is the princi ple of the thing, don't you sec' And, It a person Is disagreeably h.rlfined, a clover blossom or la cambric needle may serve to show up his naness as well as anything. Not being then socially impelled by quite the usual warmth of an allectionati• feeling toward her husband, mid conscious til•ii, that she had alr e ady said too much, Mistress Puller entered here upon a long-projected and often-attempted reform. She did not 'Mk notch f. ir tied days: and the partner of her sorrows, Inferring that she Was sulking—upon , one of 11. • rare occasions Is lion he Mc,' contiden• tial—told her so. This misconception did not tend to a healthy healing of the wound and, long atter it wits apparently closed and forgotten, there re mined vet a pain and scusltlveueas where it had , been ilarinz shown yen whence the elond arose, and In wh.tt manner the first rain fell, you 1 . .1n Imazine how It tettterett down. drop by drop, into the pelt• Ine s comfortles. shower. " I've been thinking, perhaps, yon wonld be trill as happy by yourself: you with yonr things and I with mine. I can't seem to nle,.> you nohow," said Mr. Puffer at last, in a passionless tone. Just as thong' he had ever tried to pieose berl— as thong' he had ever had thought except to mould her, and everybody else with whom he came in con, taut, into a ftwoalmile or himself, angle for angle, hump for hump, wrinkle fur wrinkle. Titough, an for that, this is only what we are all continually trying to do, more or less, to our fellows; and' joy to us that we do not spoil the world he succeeding! These cold-blooded words, from which every drop of manifest feeling hod been carefully wrong hefor^ leavi"g, the heart, fell with paralyzing weight upon Mistress Puffer's 'ruin; but in the midst of dumb despair and self reproachful misgiv ings, she wee almost frightened to reel a ee rb a l e re . lief. Now they were likely to be loosened she per ceived how heavy and galling they had been; those chains which err ot rose, a n d titles while they are welcome, and of nnwrolight iron as soon as we weary of them. "1 think you are right, I think we shall lie hap pier apart," replied Mrs. Puffer, otter ten minutes' silence. Tple woe Cite first time in a year the husband and wife had been fully agreed, and it wve the Imginning of better days. Courage! The sunshine Is coming; hot before we nee the bow of promise there mast be, to bring out Its vivid bri4litnicmi, a cloud of exceed ing blackness. The day wore on; the husband husked corn, and the wife darned his stocking+, and pat new sleeves in to hie old shirts, because, poor min ! there would be no one so do these things for him hr-and-by. At evening, when the fire woo cracking up the broad block chimney, and a blaz!ng pipe-knot wan flooding the low wainsrot.•d kitchen with homely cheerful nes+, throwing off sparkles of light from the piled up pans upon the dre+ser shelves, and making the duet-pan, Mowing on Its nail behind the pantry door, shine like a first Arlass Kn.l-nonr; when dog lay curled upon the hearth, a brindle mass of em bodied comfort, Mr. Puffer sat mending a harness at one side of the pin, kuot, and Mrs. Puffer sat at the other knitting a uew Leal upon a defective sock. There was an appropriateuess in the accident of sitting separated by the brindled Bost; for the dog family had been, indeed, ono of tee chief promoters 01 domestic schism. Mistress Putter, as It haPpoied, [bated on cats and detested dogs, while waster approved of dogs and despised cats. So that it always 101 l out, the play ful, purring kittens which misiresa possessed her self of and /cred with all her heart, invariably disan paared, euddeuly and untimely, like Ihueheard'a wives; while a great lazy elution of a dog perpet ually fattened .and grew insolent without let or hi:lt:run , . being always eating, always underfoot, awl always barking distractedly at passing travelers. The group sat thus upon the evening of that fatal day, waking a pleasant picture of domestic happl ; but out, alas, that was not founded upon fact. '• I've been thinking whether or no Liwyer Sabin wouldn't be tip g.iod n looel as we can got to help about dividing np the stuff," paid Mr. Puffer, pres ently, trying ; to put a wa.x.en end through an awl hole. " Yes, I should call him as good a I.BoiCe 89 any. He is a man of excellent judgeueut and prudence, and he Isn't of the telling kind, who would be likely t o bleb all the pal ticulara to everybody," replied Mrs. Puffer. This was the second point of agreement. Then followed a long silence, filled gray by the crackling of the tire, the heavy ticking of thegaunt eight-day clock, and the snorlog of floa,e. It was not mail the clock had liked half an hour from time into eternity that the good man spoke again. "I calculate it will be yonr best way to take your part and go up to your brother's William will be glad enough of you for a housekeeper, Inc he has had to get along alnioat any way since his wife died." " Yes, I expect 1 an h.. a help to William," re pli4 d Mrs. I'., for the third time harmonizing. " But what do you lay out to do for a bonse keep-r "Wall, am counting on making a shift somehow, with mother's help," returned Mr. P., drawing up his waxed thread. Now the motlpir woe an Infirm old body riot over neat or tnergutic at the be=t, and Mrs. P.'s huart le.tcan toewell woh pity ; but of course it was not for her to object or dictate, so she only knit the butter, linowinu well thero - woutd be non• tietul. '• I want to finish out ruy corn tomorrow. What suppo,ing we rlde up to Bahln's the day after and scttle up the matter V" stergested Mr. Puffer, when the clock struck eine. "Two, four, six. eight, ten," responded the dame, counting her stitches. " I don't know but that time '4 RI suit me as welt canny. I have been laying out to make up the tininess to-morrow, and then you need a new frock, you know; but I guess I can fetch them both to.morrow." There wag a ramie of sadness In her tone for she was morally mare Mother Puff,v would let the pre s”tves mould or ferment or come to ruin In some unbousewitely way; and she was thinking, too, of the rags to be In the blue woolen frock. But then it was not worth while to show any such feeling; so, just to tetify to her lighthearted Indifference, she begun to sing softly to herself while she bound off the heel ; mean time the husband, from his side of the dog. could but cuurcgs that the sound of tier voice as touch more 'musical than his poor old mother's asthmatic breathing. The next morning Mr. and hire. Pnftcr were astir long before light, fur they had n busy day before them. Yr. Kira bunked out his corn and ate his meale, 'which happened to be of his favorite kinds of fund, Ids usual heavy thence; and.lim P.; well I am afraid Met. P , though she bustled about with a gerat show of cheerful activity, mingled a few pity ing tears With the beef brine she with scalding, and even went so far as to pat Bose once or twice, and feel a thrill of affection for him In hew capadona heart when he looked up with a wag of delight. But the busy hours of the October day hastened to spend themselves, and quite too soon the old skele ton clock pounded out nine of the evening again. "Do you lay oat to be ready to go to the Bqulre's to-morrow," asked Mr. Puffer at last, finding Mrs. Parer woud not speak, according to der wotit,iand Lava him the trouble of opening his mouth. " suppose so," returned that lady reluct ( "WS; " 4 rather thought whether or no I shouldn't :manage to spin Up that little handful of rolls into stocking yarn' then the ',tack 'vtllegs! ne [ cdu ilrettleKtrl.t; I wed do finppOse your , . • flannels ought by good rights to have an overlmul lug ; but somehow the time has slipped away, anti, haven't seemed to accomplish haU I meant, to. Tho fact Is, there is always something to be done In a house, and I don't know bull mu as ready 451 ahall he. Your mother will keep up things 'Met beat/she can, I have ho doubt ; but the poor old lady Is hith er wbeisy and shaky, and She can't do as. she could •ace."' Aa a reply was not strictly necessary, of roam . Mr. Puffer made none, bat there anus an answerbig " Amen" deep down in hie heart, which wee the fourth time they two had foil:la a point of sgthe- Mcnt . That night Mistress Puffer could not sleep for thinking how everything In her well-ordered - house would go speedily and surely to ruck and ruin on der the thriftlessness of madam the mother. Neith , er could master sleep for thinking, selfish goal of the same. But I will do him the bredit of admitting that, mingled with personal bewallings, was a de gm, of pity for the slavish toil which awaited his late helpmate at her brother a house, where there was, besides, a possible etutnee that she might be at any time supplanted by a nes Bo upon the next morning the husband and wife drove over to Counselor Sabin's In the high-backed green wagon, with the pumpkin-and-milk home, heartily agreeing, fifthly, in pity for each other.. " Ye-es, ye-es! As I undo Band it, yon two wish to divide your Mint possessions, and go each your way, without any pubic fennel divorcement. Wa al, wa-al ; let us see! let us see !" said Squire Sabin, referring to a paper which hoped already filled with minutes. "Five cows; whtit will you do about them ? make beef of one,and divide thorned, hey!" No, I would not consent to that. It is mY cholee ; he has three cows ; he will find more use for them than I shall, being that two cows make nothing of a dairy by themselves ; while my share, Ise it less or more, will work right in with my broth er's," put in the good dame. "I shan't agree to any seen division. If I find I need more cows I can by them ; and I am not will ing that 'he should go away emptyhanded. She won't end she has got any too much to make her- self comfortable with the most also can have," re. turned he. Ana thus they began to disagree again. "I am willing for anything which is fair, but I shu'n't consent to such a one-sided dividing off us he speaks of. I mean to take a reasonable view, and I went he should do the same; and he knows, if he looks at the matter canuldly, that he will find more use for three cows than I shall. So there is' no good multiplying words about it, for I shu'n't come hack of what I have said '." protested Mistress Putter, resolutely ifirinph! If you can not agree to live together, you must agree to separate, rut know," Interposed the lawyer, who testifies that contention of mutual concession may be as difficult to settle satisfaetorily as strife of mutual disagreement. Silenced, but not convinced, Good-man Puffer held his pvace hereupon, while he inwardly reflected that the Good-wife could cot prevent his driving this hone of contention—the third cow—over to her brother's .barn in due season. So be allowed her face to glow with fattened triumph without any fur ther protest. But passing down along Squire Sa bin's list, the swine proved quite at , unmanageable in their turn as the lune. I have no notion of taking the fat hog and 0110 of the little pigs. What can I do, I should like to know, in the drat place, with such a pile of meat? And when you have fed that porker up to this time, and thought so much of him, I sha'n't hear a word to taking him, any way. Now that is so!" affirmed the Good-wife. On the other hand the Good-man was equally de cided. Venter couldn't try up the tat into lard and take care of the meat, if we kept It; and the pork is worth as touch for her to sell as it is to me," he said "Ye-es ! Wa-al, I would suggest that, as you two can't agree even to disagree, you make a comprO mho. Mrs. P. had the matter of the cows her own way; suppose, then, Mr. Puffer suits himself in the pig question ?" Interposed the counselor, mending his pen for a fresh start. o. Come, now, that is no more than lair I" assent ed Mr. Puffer; although, of course, the arrant hypo crite was all the time conscious in his inmost hart--and outmost, too, hn ; tbat matter—that he bad never for a moment intended to abide by the decision of good Mrs. P. in the last dispute. There in you see a silent partner has the advantage in an argument; (or good Mrs. P. herself, having no pow er or knowing this mental reservation, was obliged reluctantly to concede. Thus, Inch by inch, and animal by animal, they fought their way through the live-stock ; and com ing atter a tedious while to the personal property, found thst to he even more refractory 4 ` He must have two bed-quilts and two pairs of sheet• to my one. I shan't give my consent to any thing else; his mother is getting too oli and feeble fnr quitting, weaving, and such work," affirmed the Good-wife, with cheerful benevolence. " Of course I shan't take her setting-out, and she needn't propose it !" protested Good-man. Mrs. I'. opened her mouth with a face which evinced a burst of words as clearly as ever a black cloud betokened a burst of rain. " Poo needn't say a word for nor against. I tell ou I won't hear it, even If you run out a case as long and as strong as the Mond Law !" added her lord, with unusual tervor. " II.m•m! yes-es! Wa-al, my advice to' you two good people Is, seeing you cannot agree to separate, to get Into your wagon end ride home together,' said wise counselor Sabin, at last, cleaning his pen apon his hair and twisting the paper of minutes In to a cigar-lighter. The good people were finally persuaded to follow this advice which proved the soundest he ever gave ; and pay iug the price of the fatted swine for It they clambered Into the high-backed wagon and rode off, with joint feeling of conscious relief, yet too shamefaced to speak the whole distance home. When they arrived there Base came running to the cud of the lane which led to the house to give them a gruff bark of welcome, Mad Mrs. P.'s heart warmed with pleasure. She even stopped in pat him and call him a nice fellow upon her way Into the porch iu full view of Mr. Puffer, who felt fal to the very tips of his callous ringers for thtri::)-i -wonted token of friendliness, while Bose jumped and frisked awkwardly around Whining with delight.— Then she disappeared through the doorway into the kitchen ; and when she saw the homely room sad its furniture looking so kindly, as they, in their w a y, gave mute welcome home again to their mis tress, she sat dowmin her old Splint rocking-chair and had a hearty cry. Then she brushed away her tears, which were by no '.'sans bitter ones, and raked open the very coals upon the stone hearth which she covered so carefully before leaving the room forever, as she believed, hong the tea-kettle on the crane, and drew out the table for supper. So when the husband came in from unharness ing the horse, and feeding the cowls and pigs, In st.:ad of the dreary stillness he had bargained - for be found the room ailve with warmth awl eheerfulnesa. The fragrance of new-mads tea, mingled with that of stewed peaches nod broiled beef, which sputtered a pltasant sort of accompaniment, to the bumming rap tkettle; while the Good-wife, with a satis face, was putting a pinto of smokingshot flapjack% buttered, and sugared, and quartered, upon the , table, and singing as blithe and light-hearted as a May bird. To tell the truth, the weak-minded wet min bad been actually kissing, with tears in her eyes, the clumsy old rolling pin, which, from its rough finish, had been to her like a thistle in The shoe for year.. " Well, wife, this seems like getting home again after a long journey," said Mr. Puffer, after warm ing his bends and his heart also at the blaze, and looking shout with a smile upon his taco which quite tranetlgured it. Aud so it was. Madam the tnothnr came inde ed with her asthma and palsy, but it was only to sit In the maid chalr. and warmest corner. A hungry gray cat appeared also very mysteriously, which 31 AIL Puffer tried at first to drive away, but Width' Mr. Puffer treated like Vice, which snctt bad Oft, first endured; then pitied, then embraced. So having found betimes, as many a married pair has found too late, alas I that howeverdlfficult union May be, disunion Is still - more dilticult and hazard. on., they have jogged up and down - so comfortably together that; to see them.• now one wcruld never stove; as I said at first, they had been of diverse minds upon any subject. MT When General Sherman was in compumditt Be"ton Blanks, $t Louts, he was in the habit of vieltiog every part of that, institution, and making hlmseLf famithr with everything that wag going an. lie wore an brown coat and a " stove-pipe hat," and was not generally rem:gated by the minor entomb or the sublieni. • One day while walking through the grounds he met with a soldier who was unmercifully beating a mole. Stop: pound! that mule!" said the General. " Git eout !" said the soldieri in blLssful. Ignorance of the person to whom, he was speaking. "I t e ll yam to atop I" reiterated the General. • "you mind.yourbuslness, and mind' tete," replied the soldier, continuing los gala uyeentent, upon the mule. " I tell you again to atop!" cad the Ekmenii.. "Do you know who I am?. I 13:11 General Sherman." ."That's played out," said the aoldier; every man who comas alont .horo with;an old tuyao coat end.a moye-pipe hat on, dams to be Glint,Wigierr man." It is presumed that for once Gerleral 131rermen considered himself puttianked.7-.Tfur2.r's ,Iragorete. "Bee here, Blether;' Said. an MI , lad seven manias, who was treed by it:dogi yolk dan't tete earn deg wash VII ewe no year apple:), I:o;pu4o(o,l[o4lkgs4:ll:lAskpipuseizi The ShtmeseTwlns have been !cot from public view for the last few years. It was well known ,tuf them that they had married two sisters, and settled I down near Salisbury. in North Carolina, on a will stocked plantation. In addition to this, they have ample funds invested through their agent in New York Through a North Carolina medical gentle- Man, now within our lines, we had the other dey an Opportunity Of Minnte entire!' particulars In missed to them. Ever since the war began, they have con• tinned to reside on their plantation, and liver in the same quiet and harmony as ever until within two years. Of comae no one ever thought of drafting than, and their negrocs prospered, except that when opt of temper from any cause, it was apt to work it self off in stalking the that one that came to hand, from which the best escape was to keep out of the way. 'Tian brothers Probably never would hare had 'any difficulty, but that their a ices though sisters, turned their hearts away, and their children were - the cause or this estrangement. Up to the period that each had five children, all prospered well enough, but one of them had a six :h. end this awoke envy and jealouky to , u , .11 an extent that the two slate's, not being boned tegetior like the twin brothers, would no longer live under the same roof, though, we believe, still indifferent es on the same plantation. The brothers are now, It seems, about fifty years of age, bat one, we believe, the smaller and feebler of the two, looks, it Is said, now fully ten years old er than the other. They can turn hack to Luck er face to face, but that is as far as the remarkable bond that unites them permits. It Is almost certain that should either die the other could not survive even for more than stew minutes, as there Is an artery as 1 large as the Immoral artery that connects them. A few years since they corresponded with some of the leading surgical operators In London, as to the possibility of the umbleus which unites them being cut, so that in case of the death of one the life of the other might be saved. At the request of the Lon don gammons they visited that city, and many ex periments were tried to determine the safety of n each an operation. Among other things, a ligature was tied firmly fora few minutes round the counce lion between them, so as to prevent the circulation of blood through the artery. But it seemed a. If each would expire if this were longer persisted In.— Thesmaller of the two fainted away and lost all con sciousness, and there were symptoms that the name effect would follow to the other, hut that the pro ctors could not be continued long enough without endangering the lite of him who was first to faint.— Should the smaller and feebler die, it might be worth while making the experiment of operating, but the prospect of prolonging the life of the other would he very small: Should, however, the larger and more healthy of the twin brothers die, there would seem absolutely no hope of saving the feebler of the two. From all this It is evident that though the canner• lion between three two brothers is very remarkable and perfectly unique, it is yet not so absolute as bar been usually supposed. in the American Cp lota. din, for instance, it is sniff that "their resttinv ion and circulation are generally synchonns in the intim state, and their mutes of sleeping and waking, thei r joys and sorrows, anger and pain, Ideas and desire are the same. They rtallze the idea of perfe, friendship, the two beint one, and each one two in thought sod act." An to ttleaa being the same, this is by no means more necessarily no than their simi lar education and habits would , WeN6ioll. Each one can bold conversation with a different person at the same time- One does not necessarily know, there. fore, what may be communicated to Use other, al though their fedlinge and passtions arc generally owing to the same entices operating upon both. Even this Is not necessarily the case, especially, we suppose, as to the degree of feeling. - Since the breaking out of the rebellion. they have both dressed in the Confederate gray, and they are both members of Cie same church, having united with a small Baptist church In their neighborhood, of which they have been considered very worthy members.—Philadelphia Ledger A KINGLY FABLE. jThere is .story told of an ....v. - saunas moral or which may tie well applied by all sover eigns. The old monarch, when dying, called Is:, son to him, put in his hands the scepter, and asked it ho could take advice as easily as he had takes] from hie father the symbol of authority. Tne young heir, grasping the scepter tightly, and hinting at the exosltenee or brevity in his counsel as well as In his wit, said, ender the circumstances, he could. "I will be brief as my breath," answered the all. dleating monarch, "and that is short enough. You look upon the world, boy, us a house of pl.msure: now, hear better from me Woe, my lad, tom 'toles inpalifolls, and good lurk is only distilled in drops.' The son looked down on Lis now silent father, and (bland he was dead. The new 'king commanded a splendid funeral, and arranged a grand ountleg party the day after. He laughed at the paternal simile, and to publish its weakness and his own fe licity, he canoed to be placed above his palace a large silver bell.; a rope passed from it to each room he occupied. •• I will ring it," said he, " whenever I feel thoroughly happy. I have no doubt 1 shall weary my arm and deafen the people's ear," For a month the bell was silent ' I Isere had my Laud on the rope," said the king, "fifty times, but I felt that I was hardly happy enough to proclaim It to my people; bet we hays gotorer our first difficul ties, and to-morrow- - On the morrow, as he was boasting of the fidelity of his ministers, he learned sisal Isis friend and t•er rant was In the habit of betraying his private (Ifs. ratchea to a neighboring potentate, from whom the traitor received stars and crosses, in return. The king sighed. "We shall not, then, toll the bell to day, but. assuredly - to-morrow." In the morning he rude over to the Louse of the mistress of his heart " There," he rem,srked to himself, as he went along in that pace which flied to be observed by the pligrinis of Canterbury, and which in England has taken Its name from two syl lables of the city's Ilataa—"Thew 1 ha , a lien Cr f Ruud disappointment." What he did find lie never toisl ; but on his return to the palace, when his groom isi the chamber looked interrogatorily between him ' and the bell rope, the monarch simply twisted the latter Into a noose, and angrily muttered as he dung It down again : " Would to heaven they were both hanging from It together." On the following day he philosophically reviewed bis case. ..r have been unreasonable ; why should f grieve ' hems:pet have been betrayed by a knave and Jilted by a girl with golden hair" I have wide dominions, a fulltreasury, a mighty army, laughing vineyards, verdant mtudows, and a people who pay taxes as It they loved me, and God's free air to breathe in. may bo happyyet," added he, advancing to the win dow; "nay, I am," and he reached his hand to the rope. He was on the very point of ringing it aiHs a go od will, when he saw a pest without and heard a voice within which made bins pause. A messenger was at Lis feet "Oh, sire ''' exclaim ed the bringer of bad tidings, "Anon treat the dust, the dress, and the gleam of arms without. The foe has broken In the land, and terror Is before him, and devastation behind him I" " Now a curse upon kingship, , that brine, a wretched monarch evils like these !' cried the Libg who wanted to be happy. The courtier hinted Boniething about the miseries of the people. "fay that Lady of Hate, whose ehoreit Is In Brittany," cried the Prince, " thou art. right. I thought to pull tastily at the bell, but I will as lustily at the sword its my sheath, and cc,' If thereho not vihne in that. flow came in the foe, and who command's them'."" The answer to this double luery told him that the enemy could not have entered had not his dispatch ' es been betrayed to the Invader; and that the van of the army was under the command of a prince, whose name was no sooner uttered to the king than he exclaimed: " HD, then 1 shall ring the bell yet. I'll have his life and the lady—" He said no mere, bdt'went ont;fonght end cleared their:mint the foe, bong the traitor with Rattle hon. omen 61.10, and returned In triumph. He had so much to employ film on Lis return, so much to med itate upon for future accomplishment, that when at night he lay down upon hia couch, weariness upon his brow, but a shade of honest Joy upon his cheek, he bad fairly forgotten the !diver hell in tits turret, ' and the ropes thus depended from it. And es fie grew grey end infirm, never turning. from his worktill the Inevitable Angel looked amt tingly In hisface, and began to beckon Mut away. He was sitting op in lila easy chair, s pale sin dealib.th, but still at ble ministry, till his ey grew dim, head sunk upon his breast, and without was a sound of " Mat voices are those?" coked he softly , is there. yet for me to do?" Hit Chancellor stooped over him as be now lay on :Scowl.; and softly whispered : "Our : father Is departing from among us, and Ilia children are at tiff. threshold in team." " Let them come fa . 0 Godi do' they really love me 1" cried the Mng. "U there_ was all to be purchased here. 0 wor thy,..aire, they, would purchase thine with their blood." The crowd streamed silently in to look once more onikegood old king, and to mourn his departure. Be stretched out his band towards thern,and asked: Have. won pint love, children, have I won yatelOveir Ottemniversak affirmative reply, gken from the etrlhough:glven with soft expreaelon, seemed to ow upon the dying monarch new life. lie rattled plopuit,on ton couch, looked like an inspired saint, ene'ittefl:to yak, bet failed. in the attempt, lima. 1 the less happy, he glanced at the ttmet where hung the bell, extended 111,, hand to the rope, gave one pull and died with a smile on his Ilps;as he rung hia own knell. A SPICY INTERVIEW. Cm the arrival of General Sherman at Savannah he saw a large uutnher of British liars displayed from Ift - 111[1111ra, and had the Cnriosity to know how many ltraish eonsnh, there were there. lla noon ascerf talued that these 11. gs were on bundlers where cot ton had looen stored away. and at once ordered It to I.e retied. Ana, It r!or that, when the General was busy engage 4 at his headquartens, a pompons gen tleman walked in, apparently in great haste, and inquired if he was General Sherman. Having re ceived an affirmative reply, the pompons gentleman remarked, " list when I e h•ll his residence United States trohps ere enraged in removing his cotton from It, when It was protected try the British flag." "Stop, sir," said Gon. 6:,eruttiu, " not your cot ton, sir, hat ety eotton ; my cotton in the name of the United St at. (ht‘ernment, air. I have notlefed," contfaued Genf rat Sherman, "a great many British flats here, all nrt stint rott,tl , I hays eck/-cti It all in the name of Inv govcruntf at." "Rot, rir," raid the ronstil, indi2nantly, "there is scorcoly citsv cotton la diarsunala that does not be long to "There ht not a pdtind of cotton here, Fir, that does not tatiung to m., fur the United States," re ',panted ttneriton. "Well, iir." .aid the coesul, swelling himself tip whit n,r ditnilV of hi. 141 1, .. nit reddening In the in szovt•nam.nt. huir ^t %lila. I shall rett..rt yoor cotalti,t to my government, sir." ".11a! pray, nr • tan,, .Ir "• sold the Groeral " roodul n, her B , tub Nlateaty, air." "Gil, he! re-pundeil the General, "I hope you nih mi• to your government. Ynu will please to NAT to your government, for me, that I have been ti t zlitine the Ern!hell government all the way from the ("iio river to Vicksburg, and thence to this point„Nt every step I !lave encountered. Brn,lsh arms, BroiO, goods el every description, at eyttry step, air. I list, hem, ' in all shapes; ntiri now, Fir, tied von cl.iiining all the cotton, sir littitend to call upon coy trownineut to ortiernie to Nits-ati at idiee," " \Vhct , 10 you plopose to an there?" asked the connl, taken somewhat aback. "1 would," retitled the General, " tali° with me a ytwntit of picks and ...bowls, and throw that cursed aiind hill into the sea, sir, and then I would pay for it, sir—lf necessary. Good day, air." It 13 E1e.,11,52 , to add that 'General Sherman was not mz'aM tronb'..d by the ofli ious representative of bar mab-sty's tr.vernruent. A TERRIBLE DUEL A few ears a , : New-E,gland gentleman, whose min.,. •• Brien, was passing a few ,1:,e4 in , ne nt nor W , •.t , •111 ettb.S, he had the mislor tune, to.i,t• ntionally, to olL•nd the susceptible Inn:or ol n ntel, who nn. on, of his tt How bos-eerp, Ills apothzica not brine r), a f no: scut h. him, which, however, n‘• ti, c wed, hum rtl pit S. The Cuionel, r.. 0, the e had won In two or three encounter , clefts a reputatioa as a duelist, at once ,oneeived I.ut his opponent was a coward, and re sot, d dhsfracc lulu, to th, I.tee Of all the assem bled wisdom of the lam-e, e ,-ordi n gly th e nr ,d, day, at Mom:mime, in marched the duelist, armed with a cowhite, and 11.(1',111 , 1111: to BrOWS.Ce proceeded to dust Id•J.clo.t In the most approved style. Brown Was rooonitoied Luckily, he had been lieutmiant of rabitia in his native thatt.., and be knew the hoptik..m, of facommodint; his enemy by a diversion. So .ruin{ a entry tureen. he toss ed the C011 , (T.15 1101, the tare of the bellhterent Colonel, oefon lie could reeoser from the drowning u.:.1 . on thus occasioned, he aprartz np Oil the table, to shower upon him with a hheral the , on! alc of the dishes around. " You ere an inter...l-- the C..lohtl teas about to Ray, hut at that I , lnt , ' :truck full 11p011 his mouth, and the word eas blockaded, lost tor. " Ila n, ,irsl ths N.. , v-EnOsnder, ,n , .oa vru3 now up, "fond of ,rreu,s, are you ? take a pu tut°, too ." hnrl..d a t clang volley of hard potatoes at Hu, " Excellent U":Za here, capital with mires head," and era,t cam, a j fate ut so' , boiled eggs against the ride of his rr Olows u.1.11,7b told hitherto de• .•11.1 shouldvrs,flow bezan t 'II,ION , W• ,11,:y a: .1 iidly, and It tweame the i the 114.....diant, 1 , 011 ktnuneil, r holied, and pa tic i!y blinded, w.te. g - ettitig 1.111.1 worst of it. Ills courage We 0,7i11.4 . out. "Take a turkey t" shouted Brown, as a noble old zoblnur de,cended luirly upon the colonel's bead, and bur-don% b b d 111. 11,dr and esoe uitw &WOW , ~ !41`1!• . " I, Ibe fringe be COMIL uod. the and Ily followed after. By tt is ;line MO W.: , irretrievably defeat ed. and 10 , opponent setred a huge plum pudding, steaming not, and holding it above his head with Utah boots seethed to bury him beneath it. Ti. aoied w it ksreer, ;;nd throwing down his cow hide, turietil about and made a rue!) for the door. t• Stop for tie pudding, colonel, stop for the pud ding " ll di I not escnpe Irom the ridicule which the off tu it.odont ti. H. etithdspiently elisfleriged four PC1,01,4, I,4llitilt wheel i- ire was particuldrlv ex e itce, ~• .1 ; al; eioi-eu. to ii.ttg, but availing t'uertnielves rut the privilege of .1 the ehrtilenged party, appointed pudding trigs for their weapons. At length the untutp te duelist, finial, no one willing to shoot or he . I ./! at, was obliged to quit the State. Ton FlttOnTtst Way.—Same twelve yearn ago, Napoleon, hid., was eriebta , nd for two things, one lor the ear,ruei 14 pr..pn0.,111., of its citizens, and the °Myr 1 . ../r tun:: zreat noinhpr of Prove made In vteindy. It a; peArr 111-1 t Itu Etstern collect,. had etoppe.l at Da} tin to sp:nti the night, and got some IV , .eau ''l -espe•tic..t Ala l'ature Conroe. During the evr-I.lng he beraine acquainted with an old drover, who appear, it well posted as to the geogrepiv ft - !1. , e.d. 'fly. atdi the .etllt etor thought he titigat a et! rceird to the best route to eArt ri it a hi, to fit,tined. "1 wth to go to Greenfield," said the collector; "now who ,iOf test war .• vdr," sant lac drover, "you had hitter go to Nanol.ton and take the road leading nearly north." The tr..o.'.inr noted it ill, n our, If I wi-h to v., to Ed tnhurg "Then go to Nupdleo.. H,ll fake the road west." t• R"•.1 I a itt go to Vernon'!" "It to N.lrn l on and It . • thn road southwest." "(o. erldnd the collector, eye ing the Crover aid thinking he was being Ito itoa , l on. "Ito ro Napoleon and take the road northwest" The t.illecifir looktil at los note book; every dl rection 11.,1 du on ; I.e began to feel his mettie ri-c, and he turned once more to the drover a kb— '•tiupp I \sant,...) to fzo to the devil?" Thy dmv. r nt•Vvr irit twratehed hia bend, and tift, i litomour• heoititton said : Wtnl, uty th.ar itir, 1 don't know Of any shorter road )ort coo .1 take than to go to Napoli:mt.". A To , L.O armor.—Slephanson; a country store keeper, a , as one day if.) lug to e•ell doe a pall' of peg sed boots. The old man gave the article °flared a lair vxationntLin, and it..tduf not to parabola. "Nt, Raid t.lt• 0t,,m.0n " Yea, very nice boots, ' oak, Joe, affom 'em." " Why they see 14.4 cheap as they make," Bald dtephenson, old) two dollam." "Yea, only 1 don't keep any hired man," return ed Joe. " Hired man ! vffrat do you want of a hired man?" asked Steplaatamt. IY, t , , 1 Nhould want a hired man 11'1 bought. them ho 1-," raid ,fur, I I. eve tWiztira: up with even a I. comical leer than usual ; " the last pair of Loma 1 had yet etty near ruined me," " flair was that ? ' n‘di , d r.ttephouson " Why," id Joy, "all the time I wore them boots, 1 had to tai. , Iwo nom with me with ham. ntera, oan on , iit side, to nail on the Soles every tWin 1 filial any leer," The en, keeper mode iu more enrla to all boots to ten:. ;;;Ze - .\t 11, , the 011,..1- erertoe ono gentle -111511 P0111{"li OW a Cin:1101I Individual toe frtand as a 6C11ip1.31 Valalt. " mud. lilt fs told, " aw,b. a looltiog chap 413 that a setd,ttor c Surely you mast be intotaken." "Ile may not be the hind of one you mean," said tho Informant, .bnt I know that ho chiselled a tallorout of a cult of elothas Scat week." "shat. A HIST TO CLP.nOTatEii.—An auditor at a funeral once remarked ; " Mum ate mlnl6ter licpt saying, ' They servant the deconsed,' had I thouht of what a lying, cheat. Mg man Mr. N--had-been, I couldn't help won der who the nalnlzter ato praying to." Tin Lola Soup R unfLrl . Silence! 'ileum hi the Court," exclaimed au IrOtated judge at a ca l m. keepiv; La .t arata,troua that, you will'uot Faience? This very morning we have decoed 11,;(10aell amigo, and net. Ward oes N o nn !sr - waraNi=a2= 11)2.00 per anntuni in. advance. IiZIIOIIODIVIRIA Corroporsdence qr therlwk)m&tgtßeprbiA:!en., 1014woulhizOlpoi:Emill:uppi):MI LISLDQUASTEBA 2D PA. VET. dye t Dep't of Bermuda Hundred,.Va, March 20.-lIIOD. f EDITOR REPUBLICAN : Presuming that a word from this port of the army will not be amiss with some of the readers of . your worthy_peper, send a "few thoughts as they occur„ ' hoping they will meet with your approval; also, unit "green back.” wbieb I herewlttteneloae, with "request, that you forward to my address the Jima/ton until each time as the above mentioned " green-back". will have been expended. The Rims/kr/who been a welcome and quite reg ular visitor while I have been in the army, but as I am on duty away Iron the Battery; I do not see le as soon as I would wish to, and although I havenow Lets than rIE months to serve I cannot well part with suet, an old and well trled friend, format to letters Le the Repuhlican In importance. At present every thing remains quiet along the front, which has been the case most of : the winter, our pickets watching the "Johnnles" mid mmaldne and storm, and they, of course, returning the cora pllmene. But this monotony has been occasionally Interrupted by the spastitodie efforts of the enemy In trying to gain a " point." But all their great efforta for the past year seem to have terminated glorious failures. Their plan of running their gun boats down the James, past our batteries at Dutch (lap, at the same time attacking our lines on each side of the ricer, for diversion, was, no doubt, camas lated to achieve Important results—perhaps a feat to " astonish the world." had the plan succeed-4 there is no telling what amount of damage would have been accomplished, but fortunately the scheme faded, and they withdrew up the river, minus a gun boat, concluding, no doubt, that "discretion was the better part of valor." The old adage that "a drowning man will catch at a straw," is emphatical ly true In their case Again they conceive the bold idea of making a midnight attack on our pickets, but this also proves a failure, for as soon as our hoys greet them with a shower of Minles, they conclude it Is host to "cover," so down they go, and all the entreaties, curses, &c., poured upon their devoted heads by their ", patriotic" officers fall to "Ore the 3out here Meat ;' for moat of the lighting part of the Rebel army seem to be more - cleating to advance with the "olive branch of peace" It their hands than stern weapops of war. This fact becomes more pat cut when we consider that their army Is fast going to pieces by wholesale desertion from its maks.— Thousands have "come into the Union" daring the past wider, making It worse for their cane than if they had lost thus heavily In battle. MOLT]) every eight we hear tiring on the picket line, but It is 00 bad omen, for we know by it that more of our erring uniiiiiern brothers are coming back to their "Fath er's house," and that their comrades are giving them a parting salute. Perhaps there are some lukewarm patriots who What this is all " talk," hut I tell you there Is de moralization In the Rebel ranks. It Is not the same army that disputed every Inch of ground from the Rapidan to these lines during last spring and aunt leer's campaign. They =neat depend anon their most trustworthy men me videttes, for there have been several cases on this line where a vidette had IWO) posted s Ith another to watch his movements where both parties would embrace the opportunity to come ever to the "Yanks." I lad the same spirit existed in their ranks that did one you ago, the affair in front of Petersburg last Saturday might have had a different termination ; for the enemy did break our lines, capturing several tatterhi, ; but In the sequel he lost nearly six thous out in killed, wounded, and prisoners, while oar loss was only as many hundreds. And the tact that the larger portion of their loss was prisoners shows Conclnsively that they are not as tensekma when they gain a foot-hold as they were a year ago. It will not be policy for Lee to break our lines often with like results. The great show around the doomed cities of Rich mond and Petersburg still goes bravely on. Prepa rations on a gigantic scale are being made for the closing entertainment. The audience have nearly all arrived, and are anxiously awaiting the com mencement of the great play which Is to cap the cli max. Bat the occupants within the fortifications of the doomed cities refuee to open their doors to the targe Crowds who are knockieg without. Both " F. V.'s" and "plebeian." seem anxious eu get sway before this large crowd of - poor white trash" from the North force an entail / ince. But how different their inclinations The "F. F. V.'s" take the first train south, where they imagine their much loved Confederacy Is In a better state of preservation than to old Virginia; while the "plebeian?' are crossing the lines and journeying north to,the shelter of the tie they were led to denounce by artful designing men : but the ruse will not work longer, " a house divided against Itself cannot stand," and this one Is fast crumbling to pieces. A few days more and the guns of Sherman will De thundering in the "Old Dominion," and the tread of his brave host will strike terror to the hearts of the vile men who have attempted the life of the best nation on earth. The gallant Sheridan has inflate ieu to the Richnsondites the part that he is to play in the great drama. They know of his troopers be ing between Richmond and Lvnehbnrg by the ef fects his knocks had on their cupboards. They next and he has struck off at a tangent making a tempo nay base at White House. They will soon learn that he has described a circle, for three days ago he passed along our rear on his way to join oar left. The movers on our military chessboard, are, eve ry day becoming more and more complicated, but all seem to tend, towards the "Sacred Soil," and It is not Improbable that the great closing scenes of the Rebellion will be enacted within the State of old Virginia. 'There certainly could be no more fitting place; for the birth place of secession has surrender ed to the Union Army without a fight, and as the remnants of their scattered armies are concentrating in Vs. let them he taught within her borders that secession Is a failure, and that It will never do fdr it again to lift its brazen head within the borders of these United States. Stamm 80:h.—Last night as I sat writing, a furl onsconnonade commenced on the Petersburg front, surpassing anything I ever heard. and as the night sue dark, the SCCIIO axe-sled fire-works 'Which are commonly witnessed on Fourth of July occasions, consequently all hands went out to the breast-works to have a view of the contest. We have not yet learned the result of„the affair. There is occasional firing to that directilln to-day,—but if a move had been contemplated no doubt It will be impeded by the heavy rain which fell during the latter part of the night, and which has not ceased yet. Our army is well fed sod clothed, arid in excellent spirita—fully equal to the coming contest. In a few days there will be important and exciting news from Virginia which will send a thrill of joy to every household In the country; for judging from present prospects the day is not far distant when Peace will again unfurl her banner over our ells. tructed country, which will be responded to by grateful, people. That Inch will be the speedy and happy censure mat ion.ot this great struggle is the earnest wish of, Tour humble servant, J. id. R., 2d Pa. Va. Artffkry PRESIDENT Jong Q. ADLIII3 ox TU MCIIIAL or rue 'filAtiCUT OP OTILIWW.—When John Q Adams waq Pre,.ideut, be watt traveling Intog through Now York State; and never having seen Chancellor Bent, eonei"ded to give him a calk He reached his house quite late in the evening, and without sending, op Lis name was ushered Into the library where be Chancellor was hosy reading. He looked np Mole his book, requested his unknown visitor to . be seated, an 4 resumed 415 reading. After looking around for a few minutes, the President addvm the Chancellor, and the following conversation en sued; " I see you have a great many books here," said the President. ', Yes." ' I see yon Save Shakespeare," said the President, "Lave you ever read It?" "hat I can't MEM " Do you know the moral of Othello?" " Certainly, every — min knows the moral of Othel lo," raid the Chancellor. "Why, to beware of jeal ousy, etc." " No, sir you ale wrong." i "What s It, then?" said the Chancellor, ranch surprised. ' The moral of Othello," said the Preoldeot. "Is . that a white woman must not marry a black "Inn." At a doctrine so moral, nod a moral 60 , 0T101114 ' the Chancellor concluded that his visitor was an es-' caped lunatic, so he nut to the door, (Aland, Ham ! William ! (his WU) come up here;' ere is • ! crazy man to my room." An soon BS Jan 4.-COnitt Butn.lently control his 12uthter,to speak. he Intro. , &Iced hino.elt, and the C reaceller then had ohms doubts as to his own sat‘lty. • , Cr:unarm—A person of ati observing turn off tninci, it ea has rode-through a country town, has noticed bow curious youngstera along the route will Oil the windows with their anxious feces to order to, get a glimpse of all piano Ty. ~,t,lranYee peddler. drove up in front of a hewn one day, and teeing all; hands and the conkdaring from thewindOwn got off from his cart, and the followbgr dlelogue . toolt place with the man of the hone : - ' Jonathan—"llas there been a tancralharelatelyt"! Ilan of the E10T190..-... No; why Jonathan—" I raw ono pane of glass that didn't have a head to Dm of the lion&e—" Yon IraTe Warted qu i r k, or there wUI be a funeraL" IR" It Wt. plenilt to be la ecuapantirltb tellewa 'be •mO O l Abet Vettr i ngt 7't 14 • mon