ljc' tines, Jfcto Bloomfidii;'' )a.
7
rbiladclpliia Advertisements.
Philadelphia Advertisements.
Philadelphia Advertisements.
II UMOEOUS ITEMS
Vlnoaar hitters nre lUt 'd vile fancy brink,
made of l'oor Rum, Whiskcv, Proof Spirits and Refuse
Liquor, doctored, npiced, and Avcetcncd to please the
taste, called "Tonic.! " Anniir. " " nn
&c.f that lead the tippler on (o drunken nasi and ruin, .
m ..us iukmh-iiic, iimuq iron, iie imuvo rOult
and herb of California, free from all Alcoholic Stimulant
They are UieGreat ISlood Purifier and a Life-giving
Principle, a Perfect Renovator and Invigorniar of tin
System, carrying oiT all poisonous matter and restoring
the blood to a healthy condition, enriching: it, refreshing
nnd invigorating both mind and body. They are easy
of administration, prompt in their action, certain in their'
remits, afe and reliable in all forms of 'lisense.
t No Pnrson enn take Hicie lllttcra accord
ing to directions, nnd remain Jong unwell, .provided
their bones are not destroyed bv mineral poir.': or other
means, and the vital organs wjuted beyond, the poiut
of repair.
I)-prpiu or ImUtrcBtloii. llca.liicli?, Tiln
in the SlioukU-rS, Coughs, TigliincM of the C;!ie: t, Dit
einess, Sour Eructations of the Stomach, I fad Taste
in the Month, Hilious Attacks, Palpitation of the
Heart, Inflammation of the I.untjs, Pain in the regions of
the Kidneys, and a hundred other painful symptoms,
are the offsprings of Dyspepsia. In these complaints
it has nrt equal, and one bottle will nrove a better guar- ,
antce of its merits than a lengthy advertisement.
For Fcmiilo CmnplnHHs, )n youiiR or old,'
arricd or single, at the dawn of womanhood, or the
turn of life, these Tonic llitters display so decided an '
influence that a marked improvement is soon iiercrp
tible.
For Inflmtimnf ti y nnd Chronic ltiit
mnf Urn and Gout, Dyspepsia or Indigestion, litliom,
Remittent find Tuicrnntlent Fevers, l-iieaea of the
Uloodj Liver, Kidneys and ltladder, these Hitters have
been mot successful. Such Diseases are caused by
Vitiated Hlood, wlreli is ReneralJy produced by derange
ment of the Digestive Organs.
Tliev are aOcntlo Pnrgallve ns wcllm
A Tonic, possessing also the peculiar merit of acting
us a powerful npent in relievinc Congestion or Tnflnnw
mation of the Liver and Visceral Orjatu, and in Bilious
Diseases.
For Hklit Dieeneoe, F.rtipiions, Titter, Salt
Rheum, lllotchcs, Spots, pimples, PnMules, Boils, Car
I'tmcles, King-worms, Scald-Head, Sore Kyes, Ery
fipe!a. Itch, Scurfs, Discolorations of the Skin, Humon
end Diseases of the Skin, of whatever name or nature,
are literally duj up and carried out of the system in a
t-Iiert time by the use of these Bitters. One bottle in
t'.:'.h cisci will convince the most incredulous of their
curative effects,
CleatiMA the Vlflntett IHond whenever you
f nd i:s inipnriiics bursting throush the skin in Pimples,
LruptioMs, or Sores; cleanse it when you find it ob
i micted and nhiRgish in the veins ; cleanse it when it is
fuil ; your feelings will tell yon when. Keep the blood
Iitre, and the health of the system will follow.
Urnfful thoiieikiifl proclaim Vinkqar Bit
ters the most wonderful Invigoraut (hat ever sustained
the sinking system.
Pin, Tape, nntl other Wortm, lurking In
the system of so many thousands, are effectually de
stroyed and removed. Says a distinguished physiol
ogist: Thero is scarcely an individual upon the face of the
earth whose body is exempt from the presence of worms.
It is not upon the healthy elements of the body that
worms exist, but upon the diseased humors and slimy
deposits that breed these living monsters of disease.
No system of Medicine, no vermifuges, no amhelmin
itic will free the system from worms like' these Bit
ten. Mecitnnleal Dlsenaes. Persons engaged In
Taints and Minerals, sucb as Plumbers, Type-setters,
Gold-beaters, and Miners, an they advance in life, will
be subject to paralysis of the Bowels. To guard against
this take a dose of Wai.kkr's Vinegar Bitters once
or twice a week, as a Preventive.
Till lone, KoiiiUtvitt, ami Intermittent
Fevers, which are so prevalent in the valleys of our
great rivers throughout the United States, especially
those of the Mississipin, Ohio, Missouri, Illinois, Ten
nessee, Cumberland, Arkansas, Red, Colorado, Brazos,
Rio Grande, Peark Alabama, Mobile, Savannah, Roan
oke, James, and many others, with their vast tribut.v
ries, throughout our entire country during the Summer
and Autumn, and remaikably so during seasons of
unusual heat and dryness, are Invariably accompanied
by extensive derangement of the stomach and liver, and
other abdominal viscera. There are always more or less
obstructions of the liver, a weakness and irritable state
of the stomach, and great torpor of the bowels, being
clogged up with vitiated accumulations. In their treat
ment, a purgative, exerting a powerful influence upon
these various organs, is essentially necessary. There is
no cathartic for the purpose equal to Da. J. Walkik's
Vinboar lliTTKita, as they will speedily remove the
dark-colored viscid matter with which the bowels are
loaded, at the -same time stimulating the secretions of
the liver, and generally restoring the healthy funciioos
of the digestive organs. . y
Korofula, or It I lie's Kvll, White Swellmga,
Ulcers, Erysipelas, Swelled Neck, Goiter, Scrofulous
Inflammations, Indolent Inflammations, Mercurial AL ,
fections, OJd Soras, Eruptions of the Skin, Sore Eyei,
etc., etc. In these, as in all oilier constitutional Dis
eases, Walkkr's ViNKGAt Bit-thru have shown their
great curative powers, intUa isoit ck-stwateiAiU intract
able cases".
Dr. WAlker's California Vinegar llitters
net on all these cases in a similar manner By purifying
the Blood they remove the cause, and by resolving away
the effects of the inflammation (the tubercular deposits)
the atTeeted parts receive health, and a permanent cure
is effected. ,
The) propertied of Da. Wai.kkr's Vinegar
Bitters are Aperient, Diaphoretic and Carminative,
Nutritious, Laxative. Diuretic, Sedative, Countex-lrri
tant. Sudorific, Alterative, and Anti-Bilioue. - - ! -
The Aperient and mild Laxative properties of
Dr. Walkrk's Vinrgar Hitters are the best safe
guard in all cases of eruptions and malignant fevers,
their balsamic, healing, and soothing properties protect
the humors of the fance. Tlieir Sedative properties
allay pain in the nervous system, stomach, and bowels,
either from' inflammation, wind, tolie, cramps, eta.
Their Counter-irritant influence extends throughout
the system. Theii Diuretic, properties- act on the Kid
neys, correcting and retaliating; the flow of urine. Their
Auti- Bilious projert)as stimulate the liver, in the secre
tion of bile, and us discharges through the biliary ducts,
and are sujerior to all remedial agents, for the cure of
Uilious Fever, Fever and Ague, eto.
Fortify the) baily asralust el laveaee by puri
fying all its fluide viiilr VistauAR Uittkh. No epi
ftemw: can take hold of a system thus forearmed The
liver, the stomach, tlte Ihwc1, tltft Sidneys, and the
nerves are, rcu,dsred disease-proof by thii great invig
oTarrt. ;" '
Directions Take of the Bitters nn'gong to bed
M night from a half to one and one-half wine-glaufull.
Cat good nourishing food, such as beef steak, mutton
chop, venison, rpaht bcefc, and vegetables, and take
out-door exercised They are cumnosed of purely veget
able ingredients, and contain no spirit.
J WALKER, Frop'r. U.H. McDONAl.DA.C9
Druggista and Geiu Agti San Francisco Ca)., -t
and cor. of Washington and Charjton Sts,, New York. '
SOLD. V AtL DKUGGlb IS AND DEALERS, .
PLANTS ' iVMr ' HEEDS J
,11 'lit' i
,; GltAPE yiNES,' (SO VarioUog.) : '
PEACH, APH,e. TAB.' FBTJIT TltEES,' &;
. O'rocii, Houmo 5tclc,' &p.,' ,'
FOR TXIH SPRIKO1 Q9 1871 ' ' " ''
A lnU' VftrlMy ol cliolce inrt Perfectly Reliable
r.took olliTed t lair pilce. boodit and pluuU, by
mMl. I i.i. ii. i.' i .-. i ' it 1,1. i .,
( Mrculam mailed, preiuld o tnll(iwt
No. 1. VcKelable Pliinta and bveds, Flower
Meeds &v " ' 1 ' ' " ' ' '
Mo.3. Graen Hduw. Ileddina- end Klowerlnf
PlanU, UruMineiitftl Treen. Hlu iiM, ItoHex, &n , .
Nu. S. licaiw Vine, 1th It Treeii, Small 1'rulU,
r. i,.iTfi ' ! itiveri(le Nurwirle ' i
eiRtf ( .i ' , " ilurrUjbg, Pj:
errn Aufiit wnnted to c.ll tlia beautiful Photo.
Mirflnp feftittcftte Hi, (I PhuUv
"a i- kTu)h or j p ini' h in t i tsvT
V rNeatlyeeAitedt tie Moomueld Vmm
Steam Job UlUwi ' ' ' -' --
A. B. Cunningham. 3. II, Invars. J. S.Glelm.
Cunningham, Gloirn & Co.,
''AVHOLISALK DEALZRg TW .. .
Tobacco, Segarsji&c,
NO, 4, NORTH FIFTH STREET,
fit 1 1. a an; M'i i ia.
, - . v
32810
PATTERSON & NEWLIN,
Wholcsrtlc (irorrriH, ' .
COM.MlSStDN MERCHANTS
No. 120 AUCH STREET,
7 Philadelphia,
Tlie sale of Erbs, Beedi, Grain and Wool
a specially. 31
- Please iend for a Circular. , 48
WM, H. KENNEDY,
G. W. Hickman. Geo. Vala. . A. L. Wlilteman.
Hickman, Walu & 'Whitcmau, ;
DEALERS IN
Tobacco, Scgars, &c,
No. 222 MARKET STItEET, n '
rini,Ai)Kt,riiiA, ia.
A full Stock of tlia Celebrated Monitor Na
vy, always ouliaud. 4 32 tf 10 -
BARCKOFT &' CO.,
Imimltxi auJ Jobbers
Of Staple nnd Fancy
DllY - GOODS,
Cloths, , ,
Cassimeres,
Blankets,
Linens, White Goods, Hosiery, &c,
Nos. 405 and 407 MARKET STREET, -(Above
Fourth, North Side,)
Philadelphia.
;itAYItIM. & CO.,
Wholesale Dealers In
Carpets,
Oil Cloths,
1 Shades,
Brooms,
Carpet Chain,
Batting, Wadding, Twines, &c,
And a fine assortment of
Wood nnd . Willow Ware,
. ' No. 420 Market street, above 4tli,
1 Philadelphia, Pa.
January 1, 18(9. '
John Shaflner, Jr. K. S. Zlegler. Theo. ltume
SHAFFNEK, ZIEGIER & CO.,
buccoBSors to
SHAFFNEK, ZIEGLER & CO.,
:, Importers and Dealers In
Hosiery,
falOVCM,
' , ' Suspenders,
T ll'll E A D S , , 0,0 M B S, '
i ii .. ' ". and every variety of , .
TRIMMINGS
,v;;, fancy; goods,,
1 No. 88, North Fourth Street," 1 " '
" PHILADELPHIA, I'A.
'I' Agents for Laticatter Combs.
LLOYD, 8UFFLEE, & WiLTON, .
""wholesale ''.. ,, ','
HARDWARE HOUSE,
No. 625 Market Streets ' ' ' ''
Philadelphia.
; H. It. TAYLOK, v
! ')ri( Jwith : i 'i C J
; WAINWRIGIIT & CO.
WHOLESALE GROCERS,
, " '-""and - '
; TEA DEALERS, ''
, North East Corner 61 2nd and Arch Street?,
' ' Philadelphia Ta
&C6'7
sors to
TTOAR.JlcCONKET
XX Buccessors
WM. W. PAUL & CO.,1 ! '' '-
WHOLE8AL1
B OOX A N,D SHOE
, YAKE1I0USE,
I 033 Market St. and CH Commerce Stroot,
; --''Philadelphia,'! PeWa.
ROGERS
WRICHT & SIDDALL,
Wholesale Druggists,
c AND DEALKK8 IN , ":
. - ,
Patent aVIocliciiies
119 MARKET STliliET, NEAltFItONf;
Philadelphia., Pa.
-V FULL STOCK
OF EVERYTHING CONNECTED WITH THE
BUSINESS, OF THE 11EST QUALITY,
AND AT VK11V LOW 1'KICliH.
A Good location for business, enables lis to oiler
Inducements to buyers, and makes it worth their
while to give us a trial. , . 3 8tf
DAVID D. ELDER A CO.,
.Successors to '
' MILLER & ELDER,
Booksellers and Stationers,
BLANK BOOK MANUFACTURERS,
And Dealers In v .
WINDOW CURTAINS
AND
WALL I'ArER,
No. 430 Market Street, ,
31 I'lIILADELPUIA, PA.
John Lucas & Co.,
Sole ana
THE ONLY
MANUFACTURERS
OP T1IE
IMPERIAL FRENCH,
AND
PURE SWISS GREEN,
Also, l'uro
White Lead and Color
MANUFACTURERS,
Nos, 141 and 143 North Fourth St.,
Philadelphia.
SOWER, POTTS Si CO.,
Booksellers & Stationers,
And Dealers in
CURTAIN
AND
WALL-PAPERS,
Nos. 630 Market and 523 Minor Streets,
PHILADELPHIA, PA.
Publishers of Sanders' New Renders, and
I)......,.., A Kl,l....tl,.a A l.n U,.l,aa litu,,ku nf
the United States, Feltou's Outline Maps, (to.
RLA1VIC BOOKS
Always on hand, and made to Order, Sit
A. L. Kaob
J. . Fretmibi.
KAl & FUYMIIIE,
Impohtekb and Jobbers of t
O h i ii a , G 1 a s s
. ? , . '-and--' 1 ' '
QUEENSWAllE,
801 and 808, Cherry Sti, between Arch & Race,
rniLADELPinA. .;
CT" Constantly on hand, Original Assorted
Packages. , ' , . . 8.9.1y 10
W. A. ATWOOD,
Isaac W. IUnck
ATW00D, IUNCK & CO.,
CoiuiuInmIou ItlerchanlH,
AMD 1
Wholesale Dealers In all klnd&ol Pickled and Salt
IT I H II ,
No. 210 North Wharves, above Race Street,
PHZLADBLI'IIIA, PA.
G
O TO
; l : l 1 I
'.I
17. MOETIMER'Q
: on bakoainOi
Ills Btock will be found the most complete
iiv,the county, nua conBistfior;
DllY oi
riJ.OTIIIN'U
v , VnHOCKHIKH
GHOCKHIKH
Q1IOH FINDINGS
OciADI.iaiHHARDWAliK,
" OliriLLOW AVAJtK Are
WnrAi.i, I'Al'KU
,, Wtj u UMJJ Kb all styles ., r
. , iJpoo i H b SUOliH '
, UttATM .to CAPH '
1-ITTII1TK
11111 JL WJO
W MOTION S Ac.
N'
OIL, CLOTH
VTAIt, fe NPIKKN
A'1?AU
ItPDUIC T C)L A- C
, .) T) AIS1NS AklsPICK
IfMHRIAfiE HARDWARE
1 ' VpNVKX.Olt'dlAI'KIl
, -. .. jj
.J u
mm
x' - GOODS OF EVERY. ,PTVLE ;
,. H Wp. FdR tASH,
,,c,jXiU'iM'D SEE.'
D. 1'OltT BEALE,
with
BARNES, BRO. & ILERRON,
Wholesale Dealers in
Iliitw, CapH, IT'iirH,
AND '
STUAAV.GOOD8,
No. 503 MARKET STREET, '
6101y PHILADELPHIA.
C. E. JORDAN. . J. FOX
JORDAN, FOX k CO.,
, Wholesale Dealers In .
IIxitH, Capw, 1 iii's,
AND
STRAW GOODS,
NO. Sr, NORTH THIRD STREET,
(Between Market and Arch Streets,)
018 cl PHILADELPHIA.
XV. F. KIII,KIC,
JOBBER IN
Hats, Caps, Furs,
Stl'Jl Mr - i O O l H
153 NORTH THIRD STREET,
3 9 ly 10 PHILADELPHIA.
Blatchles Cucumber Wood Pumps.
4
TRADE fm MARK.
Patcntod.
BIATCIII.EI'8
Cucumber Wood Pumps,
Tasteless, DnrnWe, Efllclent, and
CHEAP I
Are already widely known and de
servedly popular.
RECENT IMPORTANT IMPROVEMENTS,
recommend these rumps stlll'more stronnly to the
favor of the piibll.i ancf the trade. Dealers sup
plied with full descriptive Catalogues, Price Llt
&c, upon application .
TINGLEY'S PATENT
HORIZONTAL
icr ciiEAiti i iti:i:zi:it,
SAVES ICE, SAVES TIME, SAVES LABOR,
And produces the finest quality of Cream known
to the Art. Send for a Descriptive Catalogue. .
3r F. Mortimer, New Illoomllcld, Pa., is
Agent for thewj Pumps.
CHAS. G. BLATC1ILEY, Manf'r,
IM6 Coinnierce Street,
6 13tf Philadelphia, Pa.
CARSON'S
STELLAR
OIL.
This is not the lowest priced,
biitbelnx much the best Is in
the end by far the cheapest.
Do not fall to give it a trial,
and you will use no other.
THE alarmlnR Increase In the number of frlnht
tul accidents, resulting In terrible deaths
and the destruction of valuable nroerty. caused
by the Indiscriminate useof oils, known under the
name of petroleum, prompts us to call your spe
cial attention to an article which will, wherever
UKKD, remove the CAUbtf of such accidents.
We allude to
, Carson's Stellar Oil
FOR
ILLUMINATING PURPOSES.
The proprietor of this Oil has for several years
felt the necessity of providing for, and presenting
to the public, as a substitute for the dangerous
comiMiunds which are sent broadcast over the
country, an oil that is SAFE and BRILLIANT,
and entirely reliable. After a long series of labo
rious and costly exierlmeuts. he has succeeded In
providing, and now otters to the public, such a
substitute in "CARSON'S STELLAR OIL." It
should be used by every family,
1ST, Because It is safe beyond a question The
primary purpose In the preparation of STELLAR
OIL has been to make it PERFECTLY SAFE,
thus insuring the lives and property of those who
use it. . :
2D, Because It Is the most BRILLIANT liquid II
umlnntor now known. ( . , ,.
3D, Because it is more economical, in the long
run, than any of the dangerous oils and fluids
now In too common use. '
4TII, Because it Is Intensely BRILLIANT, and
therefore economical, giving the greatest possl
hie light at the least expenditure to the consum
er. Its present standard of BAFETY AND
BRILLIANCY will always be maintained, for
upon this the proprietor depends for sustaining
the high reputation the STELLAR OIL how
enjoys. ' . ,
To prevent the .adulteration of this with the ex
plosive compounds now known under the name of
kerosene. &o &o., it is put up for family use in
Five Gallon cans, each can being sealed, and
stamped with the trade-mark of the proprietor) It
cannot be tampered with .between the manufac
turer and consumer. None Is genuine without the
TRADEMARK.
STELLAR OIL Is sold only by weight, each can
containing live gallons of six and a half pounds
each, thus securing to every purchaser full muas
ure. It is the duly and Interest of all dealers and
consumers of lllumlnullngoll to use the STELLAR
Ol li only, because it alone is known to be safe and
reliable. - , ,
V All orders should be addressed to ,
JAHDILX & CO., .',,
'.., ' WHOLESALE A&KNTS,
' 136 South Front Street, :
Philadelphia.'
1 51y
. "TO COOK AGENTS."
m Ark twain's new book,
i t
ROUCHINC IT,"
Is ready tor Canvassers. It Is a comranlon vol
tune lo "Innocent Abroad," of- Which lOll.tXK)
copies have been sold. Don't waste time on books
one wants, but take one people will stop you in tlie
streets to subscribe lor. "There Is a time to
lanuli," and all who read this book will see clearly
that time hut come. Apply at once for territory
orciruuiuis. Auuress ' .
, , . NUFFIELD A8HMEAD, Publisher,'
. . '711 Sana m 8treet. Pbllade phla.
I i
A Condi) loiml Reconciliation.
" My dear Mrs. Jonos," said Mrs, Brown
"como near to my bcdKido, I'm dying, and
I wish to say a few words to you." " Yes
marm," sighed Mrs. Jones. " Well Mrs.
Jones,'; ejaculated Mrs. Brown, "you nnd
I have had a good many tifts in our day,
and now I part with you in peace ; can
you forgive me?" " Yob, marm," sobbed
Mrs. Jones, " indeed, indeed I can 1" "Am
forgiven ?'' ejaculated Mrs. Brown.
Yes inarm," responded Mrs. Jonos with
difficulty, in consequence of the intensity
of hbr ' nnguish ; and then she attempted
to weep her way out of tlie dying woman's
room. Stop a moment, my dear Mrs.
Jones," Baid tho expiring Brown ; I've
another word to say, I wish to have it
understood, that if I get well, everything
goes back, and we stand on tho same old
ground."
Singular Kpltnphtt..
Tho silent precincts of tho "cities of tho
doad," frequently furnish a sort of grim
humor in the form of eccoutrio epitaphs.
Ilore are a fow specimens. In a cemetery
in England is this over the grave of a wo
man who had a very large mouth.
Beneath this spot a woman Ucb, .
Whose head and mouth wore of equal size;
Stranger tread lightly whero sho's laid,
For if Bhe gapes from earth you'll fade.
Noar a large stone church in one of the
Now England states, reposes all that is
left of the remains of Oliver Toleup, tho
man under whose supervision tho building
was constructed. These lines commemo
rate his fame:
Hero lies Oliver Toleup, v
Who made yonder polo roll up ;
When God took his soul up,
His body filled this bolo up.
CS'Plcaso your lordship's honor and
glory," replied Tom, "I shot the hare by
accident." "By accident?" remarked
Lord Kilskiddorey. " I was firing at a
bush, and tho baste ran across my aim all
of his own accord." "Tho gamekoeper
tells mo a different story," replied his lord
ship. "Och! don't put your faith iu what
that man says," said Tom Ryan, "when ho
never cares about spakin the truth, any
how. Ho tould mo- t'other day yer lord
ship was not as fit to fill the scat of justice,
as a jackass !" " Ay, ay," exclaimed Lord
Kilsykiddery, " indeed I and what did you
say ?" " Please your lordship, I said your
lordship was."
E5F""I say, Jim, what is the difference
between the commencement and the be
ginning of anything?".
"I don't know," said Jim, "what is
it?"
"Thore ain't any," was the reply.
"I see," replied Jim, "Now you tell
me this: A mule was on one side of a river
and some hay on the other, and the mule
wanted to get at the hay without wetting
his feet, llow did he do it ?"
" I don't know," said Jones ; " I givo it
up."
"So did tho other mulo," said Jim,
W A down east paper says that presua-1
sive and humbugging agents are about in
that region, selling lightning-rods. One
old lady, on being solicited to purchase a
rod, said:
"I never was afraid of lightning, but I
altars was afraid of thunder."
" Just so," said the agent, " we can
meet your case exactly. The square ones
are lightning-rods and the round ones thunder-rods."
- .' '
t3T found out the best side to milk a
cow the other day, , says a city bred. I
asked a country ; chap why sheep stayed
white when they eat so much grass. lie
said he didn't know, and he asked me
which was the best side to milk a cow. I
told him I didn't know and he told me
" the outside.", I got the worst of that en
counter. - . , . ... ,, : I ,
CZA little gi rl, when her father's table
was honored with the presence of an es
teemed friend, began talking very earnest
ly at the first . pause in the , conversation.
Ilor father checked her rather sharply, say-
htg, . ." Why is it that you always talk so
much ?": "tause I've dot somesin to say,".
was the innocent reply. .
t2TA little' girl at school read thus:
" The widow lived on a small limbacy, left
her by a relative." "What do you call
the word?"' asked' the teacher: "the word'
is legacy, not limbacy." ' "But, Miss
Johnson," said the littlo girl, " Pa says I
must say limb, not lug." '
" Would you take the last cont a person
has for a drink of soda water?" asked a
youth. " Yes," responded the unthinking
proprietor j whereupon the hopeful pulled
out the cent and got the drink, '
" Cure I I believe you can cure noth
ing, less it be bacon," said an irascible in
dividual who was quarreling with' a physi
cian.' "In that case," said' tho doctor, "I
should ' be most successful with you as a
patient." ' '" "',"''',""'"''' '" "
t3T An exohange ; says that the correct
answer ,. to the gentleman who wrote the
song, ."Why , did J, marry?'! would bo,
" Because .you met a woman who was a
first-class fool."
1