The Bloomfield times. (New Bloomfield, Pa.) 1867-187?, August 16, 1870, Page 3, Image 3

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    l)c mmts, Nct iSloomftcltr, fla.
THIS
"Blees Patent"
NOISELESS, LINK MOTION,
LOCK-STITCH
Sowing Machine
Challenges the World In Perfection of Work,
Strength and Beauty of Stitch, Durability of Con
struction and Rapidity of Motion. Call nnd exam
ine, and for Agencies and Circulars, apply
AT I'ltlNClPAL OFFICE,
623 Broadway, New York.
4 281y-a
Who has a House to I'nint ?
JIKADY - MADE CO LOUS,
Known an " ItAlL'ltOA I)" Colors. fJuarantned to
lie more economic' moic dmalile and more con
venient lhiinan JPa nt ever lu-fore ollereil. A
book entitled "1 alu lalk Willi 1'raetieal 1'aint
(''," Willi samples, uut live by in;) 1 1 on npiilica
I'.V'V . , , , . 5IASU1JY& WIIIToN.
Ulohe W hite Lead and tlolor Works, 111 Fulton
.St.. New York. I'.stablisiied TS3 liewiire of
Imitations. 1 17 3iu
NOVET.TV MiWTUJNU. for gentlenien's
'. , , i' use only. .Sent bv rein in mail
on receipt of 30 cents. Agents wanted everywhere.
Address, X,. JIl MiOK fc CO.,
31 3ni . p. o. Kox 32(11, N.Y. City.
WATER WHEELS."
THE
DUPLEX TUHBINE.
OT Equated by any Wheel In existence.
tireal economy of water. Tlic. on Wheel
Kiilluhl,- io rtrinlite rfmiw Adapted to all kinds
of Wilis. Illustrated 1'amphlet Willi (,'serul Tables
will rice. J. K. ST10VJ0NSOX,
17 3ni 83 Liberty Nt., Is. Y.
" TTOW SHALL WE FAINT OVIt HOUSES.'
by mail, on receipt of price
jll liy ,i. v. Aiasury. CI.. !MM.. SI oil. .'mi
iMitsury & Whiton,
-ew lorii. 1 i am
HINTS ON HOUSE FA tNTINO," lly.T. W.
Musllrv. CI. 4So.. 4lle.. I'ivi. hv nmil mi i-i..
ceiplui price. lUASUHY & WIIITON, N. Y. llTHm
Sk11J.fi ,,,,w 1 la,Ic It I" 8 mos. with Stencils.
4 17 3m
-M.. -M., V-
Bulimies mailed free.
A. J. FULLAM, N. Y.
TiADTFR The Kukenie Is the most Useml ar-lJ-tli-'J-J-'k-'
tide ever Invented for voni' use
Circulars free. Mrs. Morgan, 1'. 0. 15ox:i,N.Y,3in
GENTLEMEN TU! f,KA,)T ,Cl(IAR T,p sa
XUJ-UVILUA novelty and a pleasure.
Samples 3U cents. A. Grant,l'.O.liox43J0,N.Y. 3ni
$1140 How I made It In 6 mos. with Stencils.
tJ.l-v (samples mailed free. A.J.FuLLAM.N.Y.iiin
A GREAT OFFER.
HORACE WATERS,
No. 4S1 Broadway, Xetv Yorlc
"TTriLL dispose of Onk IluNniiKn Iianos. MB
IT i.ohuons and Ouoans, of six first class ma
kers. Ineliiding Cliickerlng & Sons, at kxtkk.mki.v
low I'Kicics roil cash, urid.NU this month, or will
take from $0 to SfcS monthly until paid. 4 17 ly a
LONGEST ROOF
in the United States is on Itlnek's Sons' Factory
Easton. I 'a., one third of a mile long, and Is cov
ered with
READY ROOFING,
CHEAP, DUTIABLE and easllv applied. Send for
circular and samples to the manufacturers. '
KEADY ltOOFiNO CO.,
4 23 lya No. 64 Courtlaud St. New York.
Hinkley Knitter.
For Family Use, price $30, Knits evehytiuno,
uses only one needle, simple, reliable. Circular
and sample stocking sent fiiek. Knits ten pairs
per day. A child can operate It.' Agknts Want
ed. Address
Hinkley Knitting Machine Co., Bath, Mo,
423 3nia or 170 BltOADWAY, N, Y.
J".lsZEES 33. CLARK,
MANL'FACTUllEB AND DEAl.KU IN
Stoves, Tiiiniid Sheet Iron Ware
New Bloomflelil, Terry co., Ta.,
T7"F.E1'S constantly on hand every article usually
Kepi in a nrsi-ciass esiuuiisnment.
All the latest styles and most Improved
Parlor and Miiclicii Ntfovcs,
TO BUltN EITIIElt COAL OK WOOD!
tn. Spouting and Hoofing put. up In the most
uuiaoie maimer anu ai reasonable prices, t all
aim examine Ins slock. 3 1
Say Carriage Manufactory,
On Hiqii Street, East op Carlisle St.,
New Bloom field, I'eiin'a.
rpiIE subscriber has built a lartro and eonmiodl-
jl ous nnopon iiiya m j.ast or Carlisle fstreet,
New Bloomlleld, Pa., where he Is prepared to man
ufacture to order
On rr i ii g o s
Of every description, out of tho best material.
Sleighs of every Style,
built to order, and llnlshcd la the most artistic and
uurauie maimer.
-TfavIinr superior workmen, he Is prepared
to furnish work that will compare favorably with
the best City Work, and much more durablo, and
in iiiiicii more reasonable rales.
-REPAIRING of all kinds neatly and prompt
ly done, A call is solicited.
SAMUEL SMITH.
Sltf
htikx Jswfdiotts.
LINES TO A SKELETON.
Behold this ruin I 'Twas a skull,
Once of cthcrlul spirit full
This narrow seat was life's retreat,
This space was thought's mysterious seat.
What beauteous vision filled the spot I
What dreams of pleasure long forgot I
Nor hope, nor joy, nor love nor fear
Have left one trace of record here.
Beneath this mouldering ennopy
Once shone the bright nnd busy eye;
But start not nt the dismul void ;
If social love that eye employed
If with no lawless lire it gleamed,
But through tho dew of kindness beamed
That eye (shall be forever bright
When stars and sun are sunk In night.
Within this hollow cavern hung
The ready, swift, und tuneful tongue.
If falsehood's honey Is disdained,
And where it could not praise was chained j
If bold in virtue's cause it spoke,
Yet gentle concord never broke,
That silent tongue shall plead for thee
When timo unveils eternity.
Sny, did those lingers delve the mine,
Or wilh the envied rubies shine ?
To hew the rock or wear the ge4,
Can little now avail to thetn ;
But if the page of truth they sought,
Or comfort to the mourner brought,
These hands a richer meed shall claim
Than all that wa.t on wealth or fame.
Avails it not whether baro or shod,
These feet the paths of duty trod,
If from tho halls of ease they lied,
To svek alllictiou's hnmblc shed;
If grandeur's guilty bribe they spurned,
And home to virtue's cot returned,'
These feet with angels' wings shall vie,
And tread the palace of the sky.
Winning a Wife by Cards.
A
PAPER published in a Western
city, is responsible for tho follow-
" About 'eight or nine months since
in living in (he northern part of this
city went out into the eastern part of tho
Mate to seek Ins fortune in the new mines
of that section, leaving his wife and one
child here in town. Some seven months
:i'ro a gallant disciple of St. Crispin per
suaded the White Pine widow to take up
her abode with hini in a house he fur
nished for her. The new pair lived to
gether for about seven months, when i
lew days ago the genuine husband return
ed. Of course there was trouble in the
cnnip, but after some quarreling the men
agreed to play a game of scven-up for
tJie woman. 1 lie game came off last Sat:
unlay night, and the husband won his
wife back by just " two points." The
man claimed his wife, and tho man of
leather could not say but that he had
fairly won her.
The woman preferred tho shoemaker,
butthe husband and winner was deter-
mined to nave ins own. lie packed up
what furniture they possessed, and last
Saturday evening, with all his household
goods, left by a fast freight wagon for
California. When tho wagon started
from North C street there was quite
scene. A crowd of nearly one hundred
persons had collected to see the husband
carry away nis stake, ana tnere was
much merriment over the romantic affair,
The woman cried and wanted to stay with
the shoemaker, and the shoemaker cried
at parting with the treasure ho had lost
by not holding enough "trumps." He
asked some of the crowd if they thought
he would bo arrested if lie attempted to
take the woman out of the wagon. They
told him he lost her " on the square," and
lie must bear it like a man ; so the wagon
started, ana soon tno lair one " was gone
trom Ins gaze.
EST Capt.
currence, witnessed
-tells an amusing oc-
by him on board
foreign steamer. A gentleman most dis
tinguished in manners, and formerly as
great m diplomacy, was pacing up and
down the upper saloon, when lie suddenly
stopped in tront ot a flftgo lull-length
mirror, and after gazing at the figure
presented for a moment or two, inquired
in a very ploasant and affable tone, "Is
your name Hrown ?"
No answer. Question repeated louder,
" Is your name IJrown V
n . 1 1 .
ami no answer, question again re
pcated, louder still, " Is your
name
lirown f
No answer.
" Well said the questioner, " you
either no gentleman or very deaf."
The saloon was in a roar.
are
The Dutchman's Insurance Policy.
A GOOD ptory is told of a German
named Schmidt, who had taken the
recnution to insure the life of his wife
for $5,000, and his stable for $000; be-
leving that tho former might die and the
itter bo burnt, and he could not cet
along well without some compensation for
the loss. 13oth policies had been taken
from the same agent.
In a few months after tho stable had
been insured it caught fire and was de
stroyed. Schmidt quietly notified the
agent, and hinted to him that he would
expect the $000 at the earliest possible
moment.
The agent at once sent a builder to as
certain the coft of erecting a new stable
of the same dimensions, having learned
that the stablo hud been insurod for
more than it was worth. The builder re
ported that he could replace tho stable
with new material for $ )00 : but unfortu
nately there was an ord n in!e preventing
the erection ot frame buildings the old
stable having been of wood, lie was
then asked to estimate the cost of a brick
stable and reported the amount at $7ii0.
1 ho agent then notified Schmidt that he
would build him a new brick stable in
place of tho old frame, but Schmidt be
came very indignant at the proposition
saying ;
1 not understand dis inshurance busi
ness. 1 pay you for nine hundred tollar
and ven my shtable burn down you make
me a new one. 1 not vant a new shtable
vant my nine hundred tollar."
The agent reasoned with Schmidt, but
all to no purpose. When tho stable was
about finished Schmidt went to consult
a lawyer, thinking that he could still get
the amount of the policy, besides having
a new stable. The lawyer, however, in
formed him that the company had a
right to make good the loss by building
ii new stable, and expressed surprise that
he should talk of bringing a suit against
them.
" Uut," said Schmidt, " I inshure for
for nine hundred tollar, and dis feller put
up deui sli table lor seven hundred and
fifty 1 not uiidersthaiid dis inshurance
business.
Finding that ho could not compel pay
ment bv law, Schmidt determined to get
out of the "inshurance business," alto
gether. Calling upon the agent he
said ;
" Mr. Agent, I want you to sthop dem
inshurance on my fraw, I no pay auy
more monisli dat way. I not understand
dis inshurance business."
Agent, surprised. " Why, Mr Schmidt
vou are doing a foolish tiling. You hawo
paid considerable on this policy already
md it your wife should die you will get
$5,000.
" Yaw, dat is vat you will tell me now,"
said fcciimidt. " Y en l pays you on my
stliablc you says 1 get nine hundred tol
lar if it burnt down. You say, ' O, dat
vas an old frame stable; it not wort any-
dings; I make you a brick stable and you
not pay mo mine nine hundred tollars
Ven mine trow dies den you says to me.
'O, she vas an old Dutch woman;. she
not wort'anydings ; I gets you an Anlish
wife!" And bo I lose my fivo thousand
tollars. You not fool Schmidt again.
not understand this inshurance bust
ness."
Xew (Jaine.
Out on tho Pacific Uailroad, tho other
day, a Kickapoo Indian saw a locomotive
coming down the track toward him at the
rate of forty miles an hour, lie thought
it was an imported breed of buffalo, and
ho was anxious to secure it so ns to take
the prize at the annual exhibition of the
Kickapoo Agricultural Society. So ho
fastened one end of his lasso to his waist-
belt, and when tho engine got near enough
he threw tho uoose nicely over the smoke
stack. Perhaps it is. not necessary, but
we may as well relate that tho locomotive
did not stop. J. ho engineer and fireman
witnessed tho most successful attempt at
the flying trapeze, made by any lvickapoo
Indian upon the plains, siuco the 1st of
January. There was an aboriginal
funeral at tho next station when tho
engine arrived. Tho gravo was uot largo
for they only buried a small pieco of
copper-colored meat tied to a string and
cucloscd in a sardine box.
What Makes a Man.
Tho longer I live, the nioro certain
am that tho great difference between men,
the great and insignificant, is energy
invinciblo determination, an honest pur
pose once fixed, and tho victory. That
quality wiil do anything that can be done
in tho world ; and no talent,
no circuni
stances, no opportunity,
will makoatwO'
legged creature a man
GoiiTIIE.
without it.
A Mce Lump,
A MAN long noted for intemperate
habits was induced by the ltev.
John Abbott to sign the pledge in " his
own way," which he did iu these words i
" I pledge myself to drink no more iu
toxicating liquors for one year."
Few believed he could keep it; but at
the end of the year, he again appeared nt
a temperance meeting without once hav
ing touched a drop.
" Are you going to sign again 1" asked
Mr. Abbot.
" Yes, if I can do it in my own way,"
replied he, and accordingly he wrote :
I sign this pledge for nine hundred
and ninety-nine years; and if I live till
that time I intend to takeout a life lease."
A few days after ho called upou the
tavern-keeper, who welcomed him back
to his old haunt.
" O ! landlord," said he, ns if in pain,
" I have such a lump on my side."
" J hut s because you ve stopped drink
ing," said the landlord; ' you won't live
long if you keep on so."
" W ill drink take the lump away ? '
' Yes: if you don't drink, you'll soon
have a lump on the other side. Come
let's drink togthcr," and ho poured out
two glasses of whisky.
" i guess I won t drink. said the
former inebriate " especially if keeping
the pledge will bring another lump, for it
isn t very Jiard to bear, after all, and
with this he drew out the lump a roll of
greenbacks lroin his side pocket, and
walked off, leaving the landlord to his sad
reflections.
Sing It Any How.
A story is told of an old
clergyman
who nad tno most unbounded faitli in
Watts's hymn-book. He was fond of
saying that no could never onon to any
page without boding an appropriate hymn.
A mischievous son of Ins thought it would
be a good joke to test bis" father's faith ;
so he took an old song and pasted it over
a hymn, on one of the pages ot the book
so nicely that it could not easily be dctect-
d. At cliurcli, on ftabbath morning, the
minister happened to opert at that very
page, and commenced to read :
" Old Grimes is dead."
There was a sensation iu the audience.
He looked at the choir and they looked at
him; but such was his faith in Watts's
hymns that he undertook it again, com
mencing with the sanio line There was
another sensation in the audience.
Looking at it again, and then nt the con
gregation, and then at the choir, said he,
" Brethren, it is here in tho regular o'rder
in Watts's hymn-book and we'll sing it,
anyhow."
Saddles for Dogs.
A few evenings since, a party of young
Americans were standiug in front of an
ancient saddler's shop, kept by one Hans,
a Dutchman. M sehief leaned supreme
in. their number, and thinking to have
some sport with our German friend, one
of them opened the door and addressed
111 in .
" I say, German, have you any saddles
for dogs '("'
Looking up from his work quite com
posedly, he replied
" Yaw; come in and dry von on."
Can a Muu Swim in OH.
This question was practically solved,
recently by a workman, .employed in an
oil manufactory of Nice, who fell into a
tank of olive oil nine feet deep. He was
an expert swimmer, but he went to the
bottom likea plummet, and was only saved
from drowning by the timely aid of a
comrade. Oil is too light to swim in ; it
is not sufficiently buoyant, and does not
offer the resistance necessayto keep a man
afloat.
J5C5" A Connecticut editor, comment
ing upon the fact that a rival journalist
is rapidly cultivating a champion bald
head, inquires:
" What's the use of a man having hair,
anyway, when ho can fold his ears over
the top of his head ?"
tkif Chicago has a new church, at
which tho pulpit is provided with a cop
per speaking trumpet, which is connected
with eleven pews, where, with rubber
hoso attached, tho deaf may enjoy a ser
mon as well as those not so unfortunate
C The agent of a patent coffin says,
in his circular "Undertakers who have
usod it pronounce it a perfect Buccess.and
we ask you to try it, freo of charge, and
judge for yourself.
fray There is always wore error in
hatred than love.
SUNDAY HEALING.
How to be a Gentleman.
' You see I am a gentleman 1' said Will
Thompson. ' I will not tako an insult.'
And tho little lellow strutted up and
down iu a rage. lie had been throwing
stones at Peter Jones, and thought that
his anger proved him to be a gentleman.
'If you want to bo a gentleman, I
should think you would be a gentle boy
at first,' said his teacher. ' Gentlemen do
not throw stones at their neighbors. Peter
Jones did not throw stones ut you; and
I thiuk he is much the more likely to
prove a gentleman.'
1 Hut he's got patches on his knees,'
said Will. He dresses so shabbily; and
his father is the worst drunken loafer
iu town.'
' Bad clothes don't keep a boy from
being a gentleman,' said the teacher
' but a bad temper does. Neither can
he help the faults or sins of his father,
lie is to be pitied. .Now William, if you
want to be a gentleman, you must be a
gentle boy.'
A little farther on the teacher met lit
tle Peter Jones. Some stones had hit
him, and he was hurt by them.
' Well, Peter, what's the matter be
tween you and Will this morning V asked
the teacher.
' I was throwing a ball atone of the
boys in play, sir, and it missed him and
hit Will Thompson's dog.'
' hy did you not throw back f
' -Because, sir, my mother says to be a
gentleman I must first be a gentle boy.
So I thought it was best to keep out
of his way until he cooled off a little.'
The teacher walked on after praising
Peter's conduct; but lived to see Will
Thompson a poor outcast, and Peter Jones
a gentleman loved and respected by all.
Keuieuibcr, my young friends, that it
takes a yi'itttn lay to make a trntleman.
Suspicion Dispelled.
The following circumstance which oc
curred with me some time since, goes to
show one of the incidental advantages jof
prayer :
Being on business in Pittsburg, pur
chasing goods, I was returning home ou
one of our river packets. Having taken
passage, I was assigned to a room for the
night. I took possession of it, put some
of my baggage in, locked the door, threw
the key, us it was burdensome to carry,
in on the upper buuk and went to anoth
er part of the boat. A stranger in tho
meantime had been put along with me,
and when we were both about to turn in
for tho night, I left hini to retire alone.
Shortly after I went in, and as usual I
knelt down and committed myself and
friends at home to "Our Father's care."
Then I laid myself down and slept until
morning without a fear. When we arose
in tho morning, the stranger said to me :
" Is it not strange how we can be made to
feel secure? I have souio things about
me that I don't wish any one to know
about; but when you came to bed last
night, and before getting in I saw you
kneel down and say your prayers, I felt
all right and slept soundly without any
fear ut all." His words filled niy heart
with joy, and taught mo uever to be
ashamed of the Master I serve.
riuyinir no Crime.
An officer once complained to General
Jackson that some soldiers wcra making
a great noiso in their tent.
" What are they doing 1" asked the
General.
" They are praying now, but have been
singing," was tho reply.
" And is that a crime ?" tho General
demanded,
" The articles of war order punishment
for any unusual noise," was the reply.
" God forbid that praying should be
an unusual noiso in any camp," said
Jackson with much feeling, and advised
the officer to join them.
Inward Life.
The ago is splendid in its externalities.
Wo have tho most gorgeous .upholstery
of civilization that has ever been woven
since the world was made, tho most splen
did implements, the most gorgeous ve
hicles ; but I do not think wo have as
true an inwardlife, as correct a conscience,
as deep and thoughtful a heart as men of
other ages have hud ; and one of the
great things we need is, to counterbalance
this external tendency by coming back
a little to the inward. And not only
this, but wo niust remember that if we
are living in the outward entirely, if ex
ternalities completely absorb us, we ara
losing the real resort of all life.