Br UENRY J. ST.AITLE.
IN
ID a sfinnitlL-Vemognirrr---Itruutrlt to Vulitirs, :(21grirulfurt, tittraturr, 3rts auh a friturro, 311nritrt5, eriltral Vunittir Ault fortigit Suttllitrurt,_ 31finrti5ing, Rmagennut,
31T ll
TEEMS OF THE COMPILER,
iterThe Republican Compiler is publishd
every Monday- morning, by lIENar J. STABLE/
a t $1,75 per annum if paid in advance—s2,oo
per annum if- not paid in advance. No sub
scription discontinued, unless at the option of
„ I •.
I . 44 until si arrearagesare
ADVEthISEMENTS inserted at , the usual rates.
Jos - Wonx.” done,
,neatly, cheaply, and. with
dis Patch.;
sitrOffice -on South Baltimore street, direct
ly opposite Wampler's Tinning Estaßlishment,
one and a half squares, from the Court House.
berg beduabie teat ifstate
AT PUBLIC SALE.
(AN Monday, the Ist day of January, at 1
o'clock, P. M., will be offered at Public
Sale, on.the premises, in the Borough of Get
*tysburg, the, very desirable
.TOWN EgtlD2lng.
of Dr. DAvm GILBERT, now occupied by
- Messra..J. F.& H. J. - Fah nestock, consisting
of a full Town Lot, fronting on Baltimore and
.East Middle streets, and immediately opposite
Fahrtestocks' Store, having upon the corner
A' Large Two Story Brick ,
DWELLING SOUSE , -. ' ,. 1111
with extensive Rrick
ing on Middle,Street. Ake, a 'TWO STORY
FR.II-VE BUILDING, fronting on Baltimore
street, part of which was formerly occupied
by J. L. Schick's — Store, with a well of water
-and othet imprOvements upon. the premises.
Dr. GILBERT spared no expense in fitting Up.
the House, and: enclosing and improving the
grounds with choice trees, vines, &c. There'
is a perpetual insurance in the Franklin Fire
Insurance Company of Philadelphia, on this.
property, This presents a rare chance to se
curea residence perhaps the' most desirable in
the 'Dorough.
Also,,at the same time, that large -
Frame Dwelling House, An
two stories and an 'attic. fronting on West
High Street, west of the Catholic Church, and
nearly. Opposite_the Associate Ref. Church,.
With Lotof Ground , and outbuildings attached,
having an alley on . the North.
,These,properties will be sold upon aCcom
modating tet ms, which will be made known on
day of sale, and also to persons who may
meanwhile enquire, by
D. McCONAUGHY,
- Attorney in fact for Dr. D. Gilbert.
D.ecember.lB, 1854. is
VALUABLE . - STORE STAND AM) .FARM,
.3L PUBLIC SALE.
TU .undersigned intending to remove to
1 the City of Baltimore, will offer at Pub
lic Sale, on Tuesday, the 261 of Jastury next,
A Very Eligible Store. Stand,
together with 45 ACRES OF LAND, situated
in Mountjoy township, Adams county, about
one mile from the Turnpike road leading from
Gettysburg . to Littlestown, 5 miles from the
former and about the same distance from the
latter pla‘ce .;• the road from Emmitsburg to
Hanover passing the Store, and only 9 miles.
from the terminus of the Hanover B. R. Road.
The improvements are a , two story
WEATHERBOARDED ROUSE
•
WAREHOUSE, BARN & STA
BLE, a good well of water near the door,
and
a fine stream of water running .through the
tract. In the last 5 years, 1200 bushels of
Lime have been put on the land, and is more
over well set with clover. There sre on said
tract about 7 Acres of good Meadow and 8
Acres of excellent Timber land.
The undersigned has for The last five years
been engaged in keeping. Store at , the above
said- place, and is gratified in being able to
say, that during said time he bas done a first
rate cash business; said property is very hand
somely situated a healthy neighborhood
and will therefore make one of the first homes
in the country. Persons wishing to view
said property,will please call on the undersign.
ed residing On the same. Possession and a
good title will be given on the first day of
April next. " ALSO:
At the same time & place Will be sold a lot of
STORE GOODS,
each as ready made CLOTHING, HATS,
CAPS, H ARO W A IN, &c., with a. genera:
variety of farming implements as follows, viz :
Plows, Harrow, Cultivator, 2 heavy sets of
.1-lorse Gears, Cutting box, Cart, Chains, Bar
rells.Tubs.2 Stoves and Pipes,with a variety of
-Household & Kitchen Furniture.
Sale to commence at 10 o'clock on said day,
when attendance will be given and terms made
known, by LAW It ENCE DIETZ.
Dec. 18, 1854. is
/1,(14 - 22,2IIrvTrn,...u7 ,n=.b,7o
Special Meeting..
AT the last meeting . of the Adams County
Agricultural Society, it was reiolVed that.
subject connected with Agriculture be diSeils-
Sed at the meetings of the Society, and'that
ths first topic for inquiry be, "?he application
91' Lime to land."• A specat meeting was also
ordered', to take place at the Court-house, in
Gettyshurs,r,un 14e first Saturday in January
nee, (being the 6th of the month,) at 10
o'clock, A. M., at which time the above sub
ject will he taken up; and it is expected that
:there w Rite a general participation, particular
ly by those who have used lime in agricultural
processes, and whose observation and experi
ence have furnished them with facts of a char
acter more or less valuable. The meeting will
doubtless be an interesting and instructive
one, and all are invited to it.
t By order, JNO. - McGINLEY,
.1, STMILE, Seity,
December 4, 1R54. :d
1.0. of It. M. _
TOU will meet every Friday evening, at
63- o'clock, in !he Wigwam,' (McColl
..aughy's Hall.)' Punctual attendance is re•
quested. AUG. Se 1.1 W-ARTZ, C. of R.
r Persons wishing to connect themselves
with this Tribe, will please apply to any of
the members.
Gettysburg, Nov, 13, 1854. - 6in
/1"IC1INGS, MUSLINS, &c.—Some more
°laicise cheap Tickings,
have been 'received by A. A'l'. LO.
Poctrn.
WHAT IS A YEAR!
What is a year* •JTis but a wave
On life's dark rolling stream,
Which is so quickly gone that we
Account it but a. drincta..
'Tis but a single earnest throb
Of Time's old iron heart,
Which is tireless now, and strong AS when
It first with life did start.
What is" a year? 'Vs but a turn
Of Time's old braien wheel;
Or but a page upon the book •
Which Time must shortly seal.
'Tis but a step upon the road
Which we inust travel o'er,
A few more steps and we shall walk
Life's weary road no more.
What is a year? 'Tie but a breath -
From Time's old nostrils blown,
As rushing onward o'er the earth,
We hear the weary moan.
'Tie like the bubble on the wave,
Or dew upon the, lawn—
As transient as the mist of morn
Beneath the summer's sun.
What is a year? 'Tis but a typo
Of Life's oft changing scene,
Youth's happy morn comes ga Hy on
With hills and valleys green;
Next Summer's prime succeeds the Spring,
Then Autumn with a tear,
Then comes old winter—death, and all
Must lind a level here. -
_ Select Aliscellani).
"Some Things may be Done as Well as
• Others."
Miss Fredericka Bremer communicates the
folloWing story to Sartain's ,Magazine, for the
truth of which she is ready to vouch-:
In the University of Upsula, in Sweden,
lived a young student, a lonely youth, with a
great love for studies, but without means of
pursuing them. He was poor, and without
connexions. Still he studied, living in great
poverty, but k'e - eping a cheerful heart, and try
ing not to look at the future which looked so
grimly at him. His good humor and good
qualities made him beloved by his young com
rades. Once he was standing with some of
them in the great square of Upsula, passing
away an hour of leisure, when the attention of
the young men became arrested by a very
young and elegantlady, who at the side of an
elderly one walked slowly over the place. It
was the daughter of the governor of Upsula.
living •in the city, and the lady was her gover,
neSs. She was generally known for her beau
ty and for her goodness and gentleness of char
acter, and was looked upon with great admi
ration by the students. As the yoting men
now stood gazing at her as she passed on like
a gentle vision, one of them exclaimed:
Well, it would be 'worth something to have
a kiss from such a mouth."
The poor student, the hero of tour story, who
was looking intently on that pure and angelic
face, exclaimed, as if my inspiration, "Well, I
think I could have it." .
"What!" cried his" companions in a 'chorus,
"are you crazy ?Do you know her ?" &c.
"Not at all," he replied, "but I think she
would kiss me now if I asked her."
"What, in this place, before all our eyes ?"
"In'this place, before your eyes."
"Freely ?"
"Freely !"
"Well, if she will give you a kiss in that
manner, I will give you a thousand dollars,"
exclaimed one of the party.
• "Ajid I !' ' And I !!"cried three or four others:
for it ISO bappcned that several rich young men
were itillhe group, and,bctsl:ttnligh on so im
probable an_ event - V'i 3. challenge was
Made and receivedittf:_!:.". than we take to
relate it.
Our hero[MY 't ells not whether
he was .handsome or .plain. I have my pecu
liar reasons for believing that he was rather
plain, but singularly good looking, at the same
time}—our hero immediately walked off to
meet the young lady, and said : (min froken.]
my fortune is in your hand. - She looked at
him in astonishment, but arrested her steps.
He proceeded to state his name and condition.
his aspiration, and related simply and truly
what had passed just between him and his
companions. The lady listened attentively,
and, when he ceased to speak, she said blush
ingly, but with great sweetness : "If by so lit
tle a thing so much good can be effected, it
would be foolish in me to refuse your request,"
and she kissed the young man publicly in the
open square.
Next day the student was sent for by the
governor. He wanted to see the man who
had dared to ask a kiss from his•darighter in
that way, and whom she had consented to
kiss so.
He received him with a severe and scrutinis
ing brow, but after an hour's conversation, was
so pleased with:-him that he invited hiinlo
dine at his table during his studies at Upsula.
Our young friend now pursued his studies
in a manner which soon caused him to be re
garded as the most promising scholar at the
University. Three years were now passed
after the tirst kiss, when the young man was
allowed to give a second one to the daughter of
the governor as his intended bride:
lie became, later,one of the greatest scholars
in Sweden, as mach respected for his learning
as his character.
A DOG STonr.—The following anecdote of
canine intelligence and temper is related in a
French paper: ---‘.Count de N---, living a short
distance from Lisle, possesses a Newfoundland
dog, formerly called Castor, but, with the last,
year, 31enschikoff. A few days ago the count
left his place to proceed to Lisle, to carry to the
Receiver General's office a parcel containing
notes and other securities tcrthe amount of forty
thousand_kanes. When starting, Men schikoll
• red resloved to acroix±pany his master,
who was at last obliged to - beat hinaback with
his cane. When the count arrived at Lisle he
found that he had lost his parcel. Much alarm
ed, he proceeded to search for it on the road by
which ne had gone. There, at a little distance,
stood 31enschikoff. gently wagging his tail but
not daring to advance, from his reminiscence
of the count's cape. In his mouth was the
precious parcel, which he had piclted up, and
was faithfully carrying to his master."
ri - The worst feature in a man's face is his
nose—wheu stuck into other people's business.
GETTYSBURG, PA.: MONDAY, JANUARY I,' 1855.
Early Days of Silas Wiight.
AN INCTOENZ; •
A friend, who was• an old acquaintance of
the late Hon. Silas Wright, related to us an
anecdote of that distinguished man, which he
received from his own lips, and as we have
never seen it in print, although it may have
been we _ive it to our readers :
Mr. Wright left his home at an early age
to "seek fortune," having, by way of earthly
possessions, a fide horse, saddle and bridle, a
pair of saddle-bags, a small stock of clothing,
and five hundred dollars in money, which was
in bills, and was deposited in his saddle-bags.
He took a westward course, and in traveling
one day, he overtook a man with a wagon and
furniture, and an old span of horses, apparent
ly emigrating. There was nothing particular
ly,,attractive at „first view in the person or
equipage, but upon a closer inspection, Mr.
Wright discovered the daughter of the emi
grant; a most beautiful young lady, evidently
refined and intelligent. - They journeyed on
ward toward Geneva, chatting cosily together.
when suddenly the old gentleman recollected
that he wished to get his money changed at
the Geneva Bank, and to enable him to reach -
that place before the close of bank hours, he
proposed that young Wright should take his
seat beside the beautiful daughter, and allow
him to mouut Wright's horse and hasten for
ward. Ardent and half smitten by the charms
of the young lady, Silas gladly accepted the
proposition, arid leaping from his horse, allow
ed the old man to mount and make off with all
his earthly possessions, money included, with
out a thought.
Rapidly the hours of Thalaba went by,
while these two young and gifted beings pur
sued their course, quite leisurely, it may be
surmised, towards their journey's destination.
On arriving at Geneva, Mr. Wright drove
to the principal tavern, lefethe lady, and then
for the first time', a shade, of anxiety crossed
his mind for-the safety of his fine horse and ,
his money. He went to all the other public
houses, but could hear of no such man as he
described : he beat up to the quarters of the
cashier of the bank, and learned to his addi
tional concern, that such a man had called at
the bank and endeavered to get some money
changed, which he bad declined doing, as the
notes he presented were counterfeit !
Our future statesman then came to the con
clusion that he had made a crooked start in
life. About fifty dollars worth of 'old furni
ture, a dilapidated wagon irnd a span of worn
out horses, for a new wardrobe, fine horse, and
five hundred dollars ! Aye, but then there
was the pretty daughter —but her he could not
keep as personal pi n operty without her own
consent, and without money he hardly, wanted
a wife. He was at his wits' end, and bad just
concluded to make the best of a bad bargain.
when the old.man made his appearance with
horse and money all safe:
It turned out that the money which the ,
cashier had thought to be counterfeit was not
so, and, the mistake had given the old man the
trouble to go some distance to find an acquain.
tance,who might vouch for his respectability
in case of trouble. and this occasioned his mys
terious absence. In the sequel the beautiful
daughter became afterwards the wife of the
future statesman.— Detroit .ildverliser.
GENTEEL is a painful spectacle
in families where the mother is the drudge to
see the daughters elegantly dressed, reclining
at their ease, with their music, their_ fancy'
work, and their reading,—beguiling themselves
to the lapse of hours, days, and weeks, and
never. dreaming of their responsibilities: but,
as a necessary consequence of neglected duty,
growing weary of their useless lives, laying
hold of every invented stimulant.to rouse their
drooping energies. and blaming their fate when
they dare not blame their God for having
placed them where they are. ' These individu
als will often tell you, with an air of affected
compassion that ; "poor mamma is working her
self to death :" yet no sooner do you propose
that they should assist her, than they declare
she is quite in her elements—in short. that she
would never be happy if she had only half as
Much to do. a
NEWSPAPERS.—A man eats up a pound of
sugar, and the pleasure he enjoyed is ended ;
but the information he gets from a newspaper
is treasured up in the mind to be used wh.eneVer
occasion or inclination calls for it. A news
paper is not the wisdom of one man or two
men ; it is the wisdom of the age, of past ages,
too. A family without a newspaper is half
an age behind the times in general information:
besides they never think much or find much to.
think about. And there are the little ones,
growing up in - ignorance without a taste for
reading.
Besides all these evils there's the wife, who,
when her work is done, has to sit down with
her hands in her lap. and nothing to amuse
her mind from the toils and cares of her do
mestie,circle. Who, then, would be without
a newspaper ?—Benjamin Frank/in.
Too GOOD TO BM LAST.—At a recent election
in this State, a lad presented himself at the
polls to'claim the benefit of the elective Iran
chise.—Feeling a deep interest in a favorite
candidaye, the father, who was evidently op
posed to the boy's preference, stood at the bal
lot-box, and challenged his right to vote, on
the ground of his not being of age. The young
man declared that he was 21 years old; that
he knew it, and that he insisted upon his right.
The father becoming indignant, and wishing.
as the saying is, t ta "bluff him off," before the
judges, said :
—.Now, Bob, will you stand up there and
contradict - the ? Don't I know how old you are?
—Wasn't I there ?"
Bob looked his contempt for the old man as
he replied—
“Tnunderation s'pose you was, wasn't I
there too ?”
This settled the sire, and in went the scion's
,
vote.
SCENE IN TIIK KITCIIEN.-A woman making
bread. Enter little boy. •
Little Boy—Mother, it strikes me you are
very azy bus -
Indignant Mother—flow dare you say so ?
Don't you see I'm making bread
Little Boy—True ; but that's neither more
nor less than loafing.
A COMPETENT Bour.—Dr. Grissom, of New
York, in his annual address before the Acade
my of Medicine. tt - fear days ago, said of the
sanitary police of that city, which is composed
of twenty-nine men, that not more than one
half of them could designate incipient sivall
pox from the-effects of a mosquito bite.
"TRUTH IS MIGUTY, AND WILL iHNVAIL."
Shairing the Pace. _
Dr. E. Sanborn, of Andover, writes -to the
Boston Medical and Stirgical Journal quite an
interesting letter in favor of wearing the heard.
Tie takes the ground that the custom of shaving
the beard among nations of men is always at
tended or followed by a marked deterioration
in the physical organization, -not only of the
existing-race-of people, but of-the race to come,
and quotes examples from history to support
his conclusions. He says that the aboriginal
inhabitants of our soil and climate wore once
brave, powerful and numerous but .they
waged war against nature by uprooting the
beard from their faces and consequently grew
more and more effeminate with every genera
tion, until they became an easy prey to their
enemies and are themselves uprooted from the
face of the earth: He cites the Chinese, too,
as a people, who have been shorn of their locks
and of their strength together, till, as a nation,
they have only, a mere nominal existence,: and
he says of the Abrahamic race,; whose creed it
is to preserve unmarred "the corner of their
beards," that he never saw a case of pauperism,
premature physical debility, or premature dis
ease, among them. He says :
"The habit of shaving is not of 'origin *di
vine,' as thousands seem to think, but quite
the reverse. The ancient patriarchs, the holy
prophets, Christ and his disciples, and the ear
lier and probably purer Christians, deemed it
a violation of the laws of their nattfre. Alex
ander enforced it upon his army that they
might thereby gain a bloodier conquest. The
nobility — of Spain adoptid it through courtesy
to their beardless prince. The mass were of
course subjected to the humiliating process,
but expressed their repugnance to the outrage
in thp well known proverb--• Since we have
lost our beards, we have lost our settle—that
is; ourselves, our identity. ,We are-. rather
soulless staves, than the men our Maker made
and designed us to be."
Dr. Sanborn concludes with calling upon
every freeborn son of America to sha-ke--efall
conventionalities which oppress humanity, and
especially such as insidiously tend to vitiate
and 3epress the true manliness of man, and lie
implores all mothers, sisters and wives to sec
ond these efforts and exerekettreirgeod - t:
in creating and sustaining such purely Ameri
can habits and fashions, as will to the end of
time render them and their descendants more
excellent in all the 'relations of life.
Tun PRESENT FASIITON OF BONNETs.--At the
Normal School Celebration at Salem; on Thurs
day, Prof. Fetter made a pleasant speech on
the subject of “Female Emancipation," in
which the Salem Gazette says he was "pleas.
antly conservative"—and conservatively' pleas
ant of course—but strongly reformatory in
urging an emancipation from the tyranny , of
Fashion. He mentioned a fact of great im•
portance, on the evidence of It medical gentle
man, viz : that in his practice, the number of
cases of opthal facia. bad increased five fold since
the introduction of the present fashion of bon
nets, which afford no shade to the eyes. ; At
this-point of the remarks,tdriinst - , every - lady
present was observed to give her bonnet a starp
knock or Jerk as if to carry it further upon her
head. in the hope of saving her eyes in season.
SENTIMENTAL-A . R.—The following exquisite
little prduction is from the San - Diego Herald,
where it found a corner, in consideration of the
author's paying a Near's subscription to that
sprightly hebdomadal in advance:
To SA 1.1.1' —Presenre-en—Old
ocean's bosom-ar, murmurs forth thy name
an The. ttleuntain mists assume thy fairy
torm-ar. The gentle zephyrs froin the east-an
whisper sweet tales of thee-an The twittering
S - wallow-ar, and the warbling lark-ar, each tes
tify 'to thy presence-ar, and chant songs to thy
praise -an There's not a tendrill round my
heart-an but knows thou'rt in it-ar, while its
every pulse-ar beats but for thee alone-ar.
Truly yours, JOB A.
EGG TRADE 1.),7 em,won.NlA.--:-An important
egg trade is carried on in the markets of San
Francisco. The Farallones de los Frayks, a
group of rocky islets. lying ts little more than
twenty miles west of the entrance to the bay
of San Francisco. are the resort. of innumerable
sea fowl,known by the fishermen as "murres."
These islands are almost inaccessible, and
with a single exception, are uninhabited.
They, therefore, very naturally afford a resort
for great multitudes of birds. Some tune
since. a company was organized in San Fran
cisco,Jor' the purpose of bringing the eggs of
murres to market. An - imperfect idea of the
numbers of these birds may he formed:Trout
the fact that this company sold in that city,
the - last season, (a period -of less than two
months, July and parts of June and August)
more than five hundred thousand eggs !—AI!
these were gathered on a single one of these
Islands, and in the opinion of the eggers, not
one egg in six of those deposited on that island
was gathered. The eggs are three inches and
a half in length, and are, esteemed a great &il
eac -
THE OTHER SIDE.—The Rev. Dr. Anderson,
of Chillicothe, Ohio, in the course of a Thanks
giving Sermon in the First Presbyterian
Church. recently delivered in that place, re
marked that the• Nebraska Bill had "thrown a
substantial impediment in - the way of the on
ward march of Slavery." This is no doubt
true ; and, as political preaching seems to be
the order of the day, we are glad to see that.
some of the clergy, at least, have got hold of
good. sound, Democratic doctrine, with which
to edify their hearers, and build then► up in
the - right faith. If me must have politics from►
the Pulpit, let us havejfo sides.—Wash.
CO:O.:I:MI , BLISS IN LoNtxw•—An 'English
paper in descanting relative to the various
qualities of connubial bliss. states that. in the
city of London, the official record fur the last
year stand thus :
Runaway wives,
—= 1.132
.
Runaway husbands, 2,348
Married persons legally divorced, 4.175
Living in open warfare, 17,345
Living in private misunderstanding, 13.340
Mutually indifferent, 55,175
It - g - tir - d - ed - a.s happy; ' —3-,-IG.
Nearly happy. 127.
Perfectly happy, 1T
EceFxTtttr INDIVIDUAL. —A young man in
Alexandria, Va., is in the habit of going to the
banks of the Potomac every day after dinner,
and throwing into it a piece of fresh cooked
mutton, weighing about two pounds. Ile
thinks that he is required to minister to the
w•ants . of two souls in the other world. lie is
an industrious jeweller, and in all other re
spects is perfectly sane.
The Printer's Love.
We love to see the bhioming rose,
In all its beauty drest,
We love to hear our friends disclose
The emotions of the . breast.
We love to see the - ship arrive
Well laden to Our sllihret
- love to our - neighbors thrive,
And love to bless the poor.
We love to see domestic life,
With uninterrupted joys: •
We love to see n happy wife,
__With lots of girls and boys.. -"
We love all these—yet far -above -
All that we ever said,-
We love what every 'printer loves,
to IlArs SUBSCRIPTIONS PAW.
Npirv -- . A certain • British Banister wrote three
hands—all different. He wrote ono hand
which he could read and his clerk couldn't :
another ixhich 'his clerk could read and. he
couldn't; and a third which neither be, his
clerk, nor. anybody else could read.
O:7"They manage things funnily . in Califor
nia military funerals, for instance. After
burying the defunct,
.the band comes back and
serenades the widow."—.lllanlie Editor. •
Slander, sir ! slander !
yon said your prayers yet, John V'
""No, ma'am. It sin tmy work; Thi says
the prayers,. and I say the amens l We agreed
to do that because it. comes shorter."
(0 - Rather singular•--to see a boarding school
miss ‘.!afraid of a cow," notwithstanking she
the milking to hum," a few months
previous. Education's a great thing. .
O7'They who will abandon a friend for
one.error, know but little of the human char
acter, and prove that their hearts are cold as
their judgments are weak.
CnAnco.m. von Plots.—Provide a trough or
other suitable receptacle, fill it with charcoal,
-and.-place_it—in_your_log _pen— Few nrticte
that can be administered to swine, will prove
more beneficial than this.
1" -- A rowdy, intending to be very • witty,
thus accosted a lady in -the -street. "Madam,
crin you inform me where - I curl see the ele
phant ?'t "No ; -but if .I had a looking . .glass,
youl'd show a very large monkey.' no
rowdy slid. . ,
lirr 31x Now.—A scuffle between some Irish
laborers once took place on a narrow bridge,
and a battle royal ensuing, one of the Iliber. !
niana was very wifely knocked over the bridge.
White he was flounderin(,► about in the water,
he loudly exclaimed to his opponent—"Och,
you spalpeen, come and hi/ me now, ifyou dare."
"?Altll A MAN AND HIS WIVE (Nor asked
the Wife of a inan in a state of stupefaction, as
she wits holding hisachindliiiialit both fiands.
"Yes, I suppose so," was the reply,' "Well,
then," said she, "I came home very drunk last
night, and I ought to be ashamed of my
self."
WEALTH.--Talk about the enjoyment. of
wealth—it never was and never can be enjoyed.,
An abundance of money is a heap or misery.
A man who owns a small house, a small farm,
a small wife; a big dog, a. good cow, -two or
three fat pigs, and three children, ought to be
well satislled.-
FAST l3or.—"Timothy, my son, what are
you doing there with yourfeet dangling in the
water ?"
—Trying to catch cold, ma, so that I can have
some of those cough lozenges you gave inc
yesteitlay."_
tr7The question is often asked, what is.the
proper agelst which to be married ? Adam
took Eve to his bosom before he was - a - year old,
and old Parr married at the age of one hundred
and 'twenty ; we consider, therefore; that:any
where betvreen those , two points will answer.
(17. A, letter witli the following address
passed the Liverpool post , offlee the other day:
'•To Mickey W—A Sargant - in , the 71st
IliOlunders A Halt Brother of toy Wifes by
the Mothers side Lives in 31uIlingar or MUM
or IlOrgheiltly 11i4 wires name is Biddy.
A Monti Pts.roi„—A new pistol has been
patented by Messrs. Peak & Grilles, of N ew
Haven, (CL.,) which discharges twenty-one
shots in the same time Wescott six.
tr7"A &viato little for a shilling." saitl
penurious fellow to a physician;•who dealt out.
an emetic ; you give more ?"
TILE TROTTER Ormitorto.—"Do you keep
matches?" asked a wag of a retailer. , "Oh, yes;
all kinds," was the reply. " Well, then 1,1!
take a trotting match." .
fr 7 Narrow soulcd people are like narrow
necked bottles, the less they have in them the
more noise they make in pouring it out. ;
Cr - There is a piece of road at Winchendon,
Mass., so narrow that when two teams meet,
they have both to get over the fence be(pre
either can pass. •
37 --- " You owe u►e five dolln►s fer that opin
ion you l►ad of me," said Squire B— to a
client. "No. I don't." said the man, 'for I
never had any opinion of you."
fr7"A high wind the other night blew over
the spire of Mr. Witthingtou's church—but
didn't. blow Me spire over.
0:7-1 do declare, Sal, you look purty enuf
to eat." ~ S olomon, ain't fa eatin as fast as I
can," replied Sal with her mouth full. '
7We once - heard of a dog who had a
whistle which grew on the end of his tail. He
always called himselfwhen wanted.
r7'As the "Grace Darling" was passing
Roek's - Bridge - reeently,-she-earriett _one_ _of
her wheels away—and the other wheel also.
a"The. victory is not always to the
strong." as the boy said when he killed a
skunk with a brickbat.
Errnzuz COLA.-At St. Johnsbury, Vt., on
Wednesday week, the thermometer was 36
degrees below zero !
.•
iu—siirhy is a man with a bad memory cov
etous ? Because he isfur gelling.
TWO DOLLARS A-YEAR.
The Way to get Husbands.
NVe cchnmend the-followineto
are in haste to get married.. It is the- best
receipt for single blessedness that we have
seen:
A gentleman of the bar in a neighboring
county, in easy circumstances and pretty g
practice, had rendered hiinself somewhat-re
markable by his attempt in the way of-matri
monial speeirations. A maiden, rather ad.
vanccd in. years, residing some miles in _the
country, earing o t is. awyer's specu
lating propensity—that his character was un
exceptionable, and his situation in life was tel.
erably good, resolved upon making him her
husband. She hie upon the following expedi
ent. She pretended suddenly-to be taken very
ill, and sent for the man of the law to prepare
her will.
•
Ile attended for that purpose. By her
she devised £lO,OOO in bank stock, to be di
vided among thiee cousins, some thousands in
bonds and notes bo a niece, and the vast landed
estate to a favorite nephew. The will being
finished, she gave the lawyer a very liberal
fee,- and enjoined secrecy upon him for some
pretended purpose, thus precluding him from
an inquiry into her real circumstances. Need
I mention the result?' In a fortnight the !adj.
thought proper to be again restored to health:
The leaver called to' congratulate her on her
restoration—begged permission to visit her !
which was politely given. After a short with
ship, the'desired oiler was made. The bargain
was concluded, and ratified by the parson., The
lawyer's whole estate by his wife consists of an
annuity of sixty-five dollars.—.,English Pa
, . ,
Plums and Pk& 'Vets.
In the •'Newspaper". of Oct. 4th, a correS
pendent, sinned. J. 8., of_Marathon, Clermont
County, Ohio, asked for informationofti•troth
fill nature, in regard to the r•roper treatment of
the plum, or the destruction of the eurculio,
and .the healthful growth of theplum to pperf ec tion. Having had, much to do in the treatment
of the damson plum, as well as other kinds, aril
having succeeded in every instance, I can con*
ildently answer J. B.'s enquiries.—The,infalliT
_lcgi rt_the_case,lagns_cheapAs_
dirt, and handy and 'comtnon everywhere.
Remedy and l'reatment.—;Restoye the .stir , ,
face, marth from around the , tree two ,or three
feet: On every Wash-day throw the dirty - in - Mit
around the tree, at the time throwing theludir
all over the tree, or at least
-upon tho larger
branches; so that the whole body of the tree will
be covered with the suds. This repeated micer
or twice a week will insure success. cam.
menus the treatment early in,the spring, sO
soon as the frost is out of the groiind. and con=
tinue regularly and faithfully the operation of
soap suds till the fruit is ripe. The result will
be, your plum trees will break down with rim
fruit, unless well propped.--Duller Newspa
per. ,
. DEXTERITY OF Lovs.—A Young mayor Na.
mus, of good family, hiving a gallant, wail xt
&loss-in-conducting-the correapondence_whieli_
was teal their repeated appointments.. Abair;
drastic+, not an unusual messenger in love, was
chosen as the agent ; but hew to escape _the
vigilance of her father, &Widower, who bad &-
perpetual eye on her conduct 1 Singular as it,
may appear, the old gentlemilles whig Was,
chosen as the letter box. 'Ho wore a bag whith
his daughter used to take ot every. evening.
when he called for his night-cap, and was sum
to find a billet from her lover, which the, heir-.
dresser had placed there in the morning Wheil
ho affixed the bag, and which the old,geptke
man - had unsuspectingly carried about all do
day.—She 'had' suffloient time to &rase
replace her 'answer, which the hair-chitinfet
withdrew in the morning, to deliver toter lover.,
A TRAP FOR A TROUBLRBOXR U 114.7.6
Sheridan was one day flinch 'annoyed :to 'it
fellow member of the English' Wane of'
n3ons, who keP , tcryingout every fimr minutes, •
"Hear ! hear " Duripg, the debate he , took
occasiontodiecribe a political, contemporary,
thit wished to Eilay'regue,lnit hid only tient%)
enough tweet fool. • di. Where," etclaimed he
with great emphasis, "where shall we , find: a
more foolish knitve or a more knavish foollhan:
he ?" 4, llear ! hear !" was shouted by die
troublesame mei:Ober.. Sheridan turned torind,`
and thankingidn3 for the prompt information,
sat down amid a general roar of laughter. '• •
TAE GREAT SALT MINES IN THE MOUNTAINS
OF YIRGINTA.—The State of Virginia is moving
in the great work of internal improvement, and
ismaking-a railroad that will reach the great
salt mines' - of their • mountains, sand in a few►
years. that salt will be distributed over. the
whole of the Eastern States—its suorior qual
ity will insure for it. a ready sale everywhere,
fur it is better worth one dollar per bushel, for
table use, than any other that ever came to our
market is worth twenty-five cents. It is pure
chloride of sodium, and will remain as dry as
flour in any latitude from - .the equator to the
pole. - -
WINTER. SPORTS. ' You'll catch youfdeaths'
cries "the good taly, who hovers over a hot
stove in a close room, to her boy, who wants
to dash into the snow-drifts. or till his lungs
with fresh air, and set his cheeks glowing, and
his eyes sparkling, by au hour's glorious
skating.
Madame, let him go. Ten persons catch
their deaths by staying in hot. close- rooms,
where one is hurt by exposure to the cold.—
Live as much out of doors as you can; and
have pure air in the house.
TAR BEST PLACE.-A good old- Dutchman
and his frow sat up till gaping time, when the
latter, after a full stretch, said :
vish I vis in beben."
Hans also yawned and replied :
vish I vas in der sthill-house."
The eyes of Same flew wide open, as she ex
claimed:
pe pound for you ; you alvays wish your
self in der,pest place."
o:7Borne one having stated that the best
way to preserve apples from rotting was to
pack them in.salt. the editor _of the Albany
ne Tine triid the experiment: - Ho
they have kept for three years, and would keep
to all eternity if-they waited for, him to eat
them. The salineparthies so mix with the
apples, that you can't eat one of them without
fancying you are chewing a piece of Lot's wife.
Cots Po& Love.--Hide in a closetbalfat dna
en times and listen to the coaversatioa that
takes place between a couple who have been
married one year, while they think themselves
entirely alone.'
NO. 14.