%Ma OF IMBLItyLTION.
The RUM:WORD RILFORTILS :tabard every
Thursday morning' by GOOD K HITCHCOCK,
at One Dollar per annum, in advance.
Mir Advertising in all cases exchisive 411 sub•
scriptien to the paper.
SPECIAL NOTiCESlnsorted at Tilt cuts pet
line fordlrst Insertion, and rive C tiers perlinelor
each subsequent insertion, but no notice Inserted
for loss than fifty cents.
YEARLY ADVERTISEMENTS will be insert
ed at reasonable rates.
• Administrator's and Executor's Notices, ip;
Auditor's Notices,gl.so t Bususeaseards,livellnes,
(per year) #5, additional lines $1 each. •
Yearly advertisers -are entitled to quarterly
changes. Transient advertisements must be paid
lor in advance.
MI resolutions of associations; communications
of limited or individual Interest, and notices of
marriages or deaths:exceeding nye linesare charg•
ed rive. csirrsper line, but simple noticei Of Mar
riages and de a hs will be publiettedwithouttharge.
"'he Rcrourun having a larger circulation than
any other paper In the county, makes it. the best
advertising medium In Northern Pennsylvania.
JOB PRINTING of every klutr,„ . .in plain and
fancy colors, done with neatnearand dispatch.
Handbills, Blanks, Cards, pauw4lets, Billheads,
'Statements, Itc„ of every variety Ad *style, printed
at the shortest, notice. The.RkEolrit office Is
well supplied with power 'arises,* good assort
ment of new type, and everything Dv. the printing
line can be executed in the, most artistic manner
and at the-lowest rates. TERMS INVARIABLY
CASH.
Vusiness §arbs.
JOHN W. CODDING,
ATTORNEY-AT-LAW, TOWANDA. PA.
I
Clthee over Mason's old Rani.
THOMAS E. Ml ER
ATTORNEY-AT-LANG,
TOWANDA, PA
open with Pat,la and Foyle
PECK' A: OVERTON'
ATTOWNXTS-AT-LAW,
TOWANDA, PA.
D'A. Ovawrox,
RODNEY A.-mEßcult,
, ATTOI.IN CC AV!. AR',
TOWANDA:I'A.,
Patents. POrticular attention paid
In the Orphans Court and to the settle
rates,
Montanyes Block
Solt,!tor 1
to Iru Ines%
to ut of e t
tottlee In
OVERTON & SANDERSON,
ATTOIttitY-AT-LAW,
TOWANDA; PA?
JOHN' F. SANDEP.SON
E. OVERTON. JR.
TIT H. JESSUP,
VV •
ATTOI2NF,Y ANP Cfn*SlELl.Clit-AT-LAW,
MONTitOtW, PA.
itulge'.TesstM haring resumed the practleeof the
law In Northern Pennsylvania, will attend tunny
' legal huslness Wm:led Whim In Bradford county.
Pers , ms wishing to colDitilt Min. can call. on H.
Streeter, y.sq., Towanda, Pa., when an appointment
can he made.
H.E.IsiRI7 STREETER,
ATTOUNEY AND COCNSELLDR-AT-LAW,
TtYWANDA, PA
it L. TOWNER, M. D.,
310.11EOPATIIIC PHYSICIAN" ADD BURGEON
EA R Residence and Office Just North of Dr. Cor
bin's, on Main atrei.t, Athens. Pa. jun2ttOrn.
'V A L: ;HILLIS,
A TTO NEY-AT-1. AW,
TOW AN DA, PA.
T 7 4 V. GOFF,
.n.
ATTORNEY-AT-LAW,
WYALUSING, PA
Agency for the sale and purchase of all kiwis of
sa.•urtttes and for making loans` on Real Estate.
All business will receive careful and prompt
attn•n t lion. [June 4. .
Ayr H. THOMPSON, ATTORNEY
• Cr LAW, WYAGUSING, PA. Will attend
to all business entrusted to his care tq Bradford,
Sullivan and Wyoming Counties. Office with Esq.
Porter. ' [ ovl9-74.
1 4A
. 11.
ANGLE, D.,p. S.
oPERATIVE AND MECHANICAL DENTIST.
Wilco, on State Street, second floor of Dr. Pratt's
uitot.; apt
ELSB EE &SON,
ATTOITNETS-AT-LAW,
TOWANDA, PX..
'S. C. ELsnitEr.
1_ D. KINNEY,
1./. •
ATToRNEV,AT-LAW. •
°Mee—Rooms formerly occupied by Y. M.C. A
Reading Room.11,:li'f;8.
Iic,PITERSON,
ATTORNST-AT-LAW,
! TiMANDA, VA.
Diet Awy
JOHN W.IIIX,
ATTORNEY-AT-LAW AND U. S. COMM ISSIONERk
TOWANDA, PA.
Vice—Noriti Side Public Square.
M. W. BUCK,
A TYET-AT-LAW,
TOWANDA; PEA-21"A.
01lice—South side Poplar street, opposite Ward
. [Nov. 13, 11.179.
DAVIES & CApOCHAN,
ATTORNEYS-AT-LAW,
SOUT!i SI t`t". OV WARD HOUSE.
TOWANDA, PA,
re 23-75
ID!
AN DREW WILT,,
=
( Mice over Turner & Gordon's Drug Store,
Touanda. Pa. May he consulted to German.
[April 12. 16.]
We YOUNG,
. -
A.TroItNEYLAT-LAW,
TOW ANDA, PA.
olire—seeond door, soutti of the First NatSons]
Matti. St., op st-Iflrs..
WILLIAMS it ANGLE,
ATTORNE:YS-AT-LAW
FTIC E.—Forxuerty occupied by Wm: Watlithe,
17,1.
1311=3
WM. MAXWELL,
ATTORNEY-AT-LAW
TOWANDA, PA.
elbee over Dayton's Store
April 12. 1876.
AIADILL R CALIFF,
ATTORNEYS-AT-LAW, R
1
WIEN
Office 1n W , 04 , s Block, first door 6011th. of the First
Nit: I, n oank, up-Ntairi‘•
8..1. ALOILL. (Jan-A-731y) .1. N. CALITP.
• - '
S. M. WOODBURN, Physi
i_, clan and Surgeon. Office over 0. A. Black's
Cf ,, ,!ifety 'gore. •
T••vrao.sa. May 1,18721 r.;
T T l ,nn -- 43, O r ti s i ce
T,yth Inserted on (told, Silver, Rubber, and Al.
anthinin We. Teeth extracted without pain.
tet. 3442. .
r 4 D. I r 'AYNE, M. D.. • • .
1_44 i PIIY.LCI k.ti AND SVRGEON,
(111, 0 01 , r 3lontances• Store. - Office hours from 10
t:42 A. td.. and from . 2 to 4 0. R.
' ' Special attention given to .
II
IIIsFASES i'DISRASES
or ~ and , or
THE EVES .
I THE EAR
W. R Y - A
,!'
IB
COLNTY SUPERINTAND6
O (110! day last Saturday of:each ru9talk, neer Turner
I:urdon's Drug Store, Towanda, I's.
Towattdit, June 20, IS:6'.
U. PEET,
TEACH r: 1: OF PIANO:3/C6IC,
TF.RMS.--410 per term.
(Residence Third street, Ist Ward.)
T..wnuda, Jan. 13,'79-Iy.
ei S. RUSSELL'S
•
GENERAL
INSUItANCt AGENCY
xas-08-TotT
_ . TOWANDA, PA,
FIRST NATIONAL BANK,
TOWAIiDA, PA
CAPITAL PAID IN
SURPLUS
TIM Bank offers unusual facilities for tbe trans.
tenon of a grniral banking business.
N. N. BETTS, Cashier
rowr.Lt, reement.
EbWARD WILLIAMS,
I!IZACTICAL PLUMBER & GAS FITTER,
PlAce of business In '3lerenr Block, next door to
✓tt rn,4l Ordce, opposite Peddle Square.
Nuinbing. Gas Fitting. Repairing Pumps of all
and ail kinds of Gearing prompt 4. attended
t“. All wanting' 'work In his line should :give MAI
a call. • Dec. 4. A 79.
GOODRICH & HITCHCOCK. Publishers.
VOLUME XL.
Nothr.
A folded page, old, stained, and blurred,
I' found wltbin your book last night.
I did not read tho dim dark word
I saw in the Mow waning tight;
So put itback, and left it there,
As it in truth I did not care.
A h me have all a folded leaf
That In Time's book of long ago
•
We leave ; a bait-relief
Falls on us when we hide it ea.
We fold it down, then turn away,
And who may read that page to-day ? ;
Not you, my child ; nor you, my wife,
Who alt beside my study-chair;
For all have something in their life
That they, and' they itione:may bear—
A trilling lilt a deadly sin,
A something bought they did not win.
5ep.25,•79
BENJ. M. BE.CH
My folded leaf how blue eyes gleam "
And blot the dark-brown eyes 1 see ;
And golden Curls at evening beam
Above the black locks at my knee.
Ab, that leaf Is folded dpirn,
And aye for me, the locks are' brown.
May I, '79
Mid yet I love them who bit by t
. My best and. dearest—dearest nor.
They mayvt know for what I sigh,
What biffngs the shadow on my brow. '
Ghosts at the best; so let them be, 1:
Norcome between my life and meet,
They only rise at twilight hour ;
So light the lamp, and close the bind:
Small perfume lingers in the doweri
That sleeps that folded page behind.
So let It ever folded Ile;
'Twill be unfolded when I die
—bhavbere Journal
aigrellancous.‘'
THE QUAKER SPY.
FeP 27, •79
On the second day of December,
1777 late in the afternoon, an officer
in the British uniform ascended the
steps of a house in Second street,
Philadelphia, immediately opposite
the quarters occupied by Gen. Howe,
who, at that time, had full possession
of the city. o
The house was plain and neat in
its'exterior, and. well known to be
tenanted by Wm. and Lydia Darrah,
members of the' Society of Friends.
It was the place chosen .by the
superior officers of the army for pri
vate conference, whenever it was
necessary to hold consultations on
subjects of importance;
and selected,
perhaps, on account of the unobtru
sive character of its inmates, whose
religion inculcated meekness and for
beirance, and forbade them to prac
tice the arts of war.
[novll-75
The .oflicer, who seemed quite
familiar with the mansion, knocked
at.the door. It was opened, and in
the neatly furnished parlor he met
the mistress, who spoke to him, cal
ling him by name. It was the adju
tant general, and he appeared in
baste to give an order. This was to
desire that the habit - rOom above
qtairs might be prepared for the re
ception that evening of himself and
his friends, who'were to meet there
and remain late.
" And he sure, Lyda," he conclud;
" that your family are all in bed
at an early how.. I shall expect you
to attend to this request. When our
guests are ready to leave the house,
I will myself give' you notice, that
you may let us out and extinguish
the fire andcandles."
L. Ecisauss
t feb.l•7B.
Jan. 1,1875
Having delivered this order with
an emphatic manner, which'showed
that he relied much on the prudence
and discretion of the_ person he ad
d ressed,theadjutant general departed.
'- : Lydia betook 'herself to getting all
things in readiness. , Bat the words
she had heard, especially the injunc
tion to, retire early, rang in her 'ear,
and she could not divest herself of
the indefinable feeling that something
of importance was in agitation.
Whileler hands were busy in the
duties
,that devolved upon her, her
mind was no less actively at work.
The evening _closed in, and the
officers came to the place of meetini..
Lydia had ordered all her family to
bed, and herself admitted the guests,
after which iShe :retired to her own
il
apartment a threw herself, with•
out undressln „upon the bed.
But sleep i fused to visit her eye
lids. Her vitt! apprehensions gradu
ally assumed more - definite shape.
She became more and more. uneasy,
till her'nervOns restleisness•amount
ed to absolute terror. I
Unable longer to resist the impulse
—not, of_ curiosity, but surely of a
far higher feeling—she slid from the
bed, and, taking off . hen shoes, pass
ed noislessly from' the chamber and
along the entry. Approaching cau
tiously the apartment in which the
officers were assembled, she • applied
her ear to the key-hole. - For a few
moments she could distiUgnished but
a word or two among the inui•Our of
_voices ; yiet what she did behr but
stimulated her eager dere to learn
the important secret of the,conclave.
At length there was• profound
silence, and a voice was heard read
ing a paper aloud. It was an order
for the troops to quit the city on the
night of the fourth, and mareh•out
to a secret attack upon.the American
army, then encamped at White
Marsh.
Lydia had heard enough. She re
treated softly to her own room,.and
laid herself quietly on the bed. In
the deep stillness that reigned
thiough the house she could hear the
beating of her own heart—the heart
now throbbing with emotions to
which no speech could give,utterance.
It seemed to = her that but a few
moments had elapsed, when there
was a knocking at her 'door. She
knew well what the signal meant,i
but took no heed. It was repeated;
and more loudly; still" she gave no
answer. Again, 'and yet more loudly,
the knocks were repeated; and then
she rose quickly and opened the
door.
$125.000
66,000
It was the adjutant general, who
came to inform her that they were
ready to depart. Lydia let them out,
fastened the house; and extinguished
the lights and fire. Again title return
ed to her chamber and to bed.; but
rcrose was a stranger for the rest of
the night.. Her mind was more dis
quieted than ever.
Arll 1. 187.9
She thought of the danger that
threatened the lives of thousands of
her countrymen, and of the ruin that
impended over the _ whole land.
Something must be done, and that
A FOLDED LEAF.
immediately, to aver this widespread
destructicen. o Should she awaken her
husband and inform him ? That
would be to place him. in special
jeopardy by rendering him a par
taker of her secret; and he might,
too, be less wary and prudent than
herself. No; come what might, she
would encounter the risk alone.
After a petition for heavenly guid
ance, her resolution was formed ; and
she, waited with composure, though
sleep war impossible, till the dawn of
day. Tien she waked her husband
and informed him flour was wanted
for the use of the household, and
that it was necessary she should go
to Frankford to procure it. This
was no uncommon occurrence, and
her declining the attendance • of the
maid servant excited little surprise.
Taking the bag with her, she walk
ed thrOugh the snow, having stopped
first at headquarters l ,ob i t4ined access
to General Bowe, and' inured. his
written permission to 'pa'ssihe British
lines.'
The feeling of a wife and mother
—one whose religion was that of
love, and °fie whose life was but a
quiet round ,of domestic duties—
bound
. on an enterprise so hazardous,
and uncertain that her life might
be the forfeit, may be bettei imagin
ed than described.
Lydia reached Frankford, distant
four or five miles, and deposited her
bag at the mill. Now commenced
the dangers elf,her undertaking, for
she pressed forward with all haste
toward the outposts of the American
army. Her. determination was to
apprise General Washin,gton of his
danger.
She was met on her way - by an
American officer, who bad been,
selected by General Washington to
gain information respecting the move
ments of the British forces. Accord
ing to some authorities, this was
Lieutenant 'Colonel 'Craig of the
Light Horse. Ile immediately recog-,
nized her and inquired whither she
was going. In replr,she prayed him
to alight and walk with her; which
he did, ordering his men to keep in
sight.
.To hint' she disclosed- the
secret, after 19:ving
,obtained from
him a solemn promise not to betray
her individuality, , since the British
might take vengeance on ; lk and her
The officer thanked her for her
timely warning, and directed her-to
go to a house near at hand where she
might get something ,to eat; but
Lydia preferred returning at once,
and did so, while the offic'er made all
haste - to the commander-in-chief.
Preparations were immediately made
to give the enemy a fitting reception.
With a, heart lightened and filled
with thankfulness, the intrepid
woman pursued her way homeward,
carrying the bag of flour which had
served as the ostensible object of her
journey.. None suspected the grave,
demure Quakeress of having snatch
ed from the English their anticipated
victory.
Her demeanor was, as usual, quiet,
orderly and subdued, and she attend
ed to the duties of her family with
her wonted composure. But her
heait beat, as late On the appointed_
night she watched- from her window_
the departure of -the army—on what
secret expedition bound she knew too
well. She_listened breathlessly to
the sound of their footsteps and the
tramping of their horses till it died
away in the distance and silence
reigned through' the city.
Time never appearedi to pass so
slowly as during the interval which,
elapsed between the- marching out
and return of the Witish troops.
When at last the distant roll of the
drums proclaimed their approach ;
when the sounds came', nearer and
nearer, and Lydia, who c ivas watching
at the Window, saw the troops pass in
martial-Order, the agony of the anx
iety she, felt was to 'lrch for her
strength, and she retreated, from her
post not daring ,to ask a question.; or
manifest the least curiosity as to the
event.
A sudden and loud knocking at
her door was not calculated to lessen
her apprehensiOns. ' She felt that the
safety of her family depended on her
self possession at this critical mo
ment. The visitor was the adjutant
general, who summoned her to his
apartment. With a pale cheek, but
composed,' for she placed her trust-in
a higher Power, Lydia
~obeyed the
summons. The officers face WO,
clouded and his expression stern.
Ile locked the door with an air of
mystery ,when Lydia entered, and
motioned her 'to a seat. After a
moment of silence, he said : !" Were
•any of your family up, Lydia, on the
night when I; received company at
this house ?"
" No," was the unhesitating reply.
" They all retired at , eight o'clock."
" It isi very strange," said the
officer, and he mused a few minutes.
". You, I know, Lydia, were asleep,
for I knocked at your door three
times before you heard me; yet it is
certain that we were betrayed. I
am altogether at a loss to conceive
who could have given the informatiOn
to General Washington. On arriving
near his encampment, we found
his cannonbounted, his troops under
arms. and so prepared sit every post
to receive us,. that we have been com
pelled to march back without injur ,
ing the enemy, like a parcel of fools."
NAE SAE EASY TO EIS / A PIPER.-
Southern Lord (staying at Highland.
Castle)—" Thank you so much. l—
ali—weally enjoy our music. I think
Of having a piper at my own place."
'Sandy the Piper—" An' fat kin' o' a
piper would your lord shipbe needin'?"
Southern Lord—" Oh, certainly a
good piper like rurself, Sandy."
Sandy (sniflling)---" Och I Indeed !
Ye might easily fin' a lord like your
lordship, but it's tae sae easy to fin'
a piper like me whatever."—Punch.
A MESE was• discharged, and asked
the reason. "You are so awful slow
about everything," said his employer.
"You dome an injustice," responded the
clerk. "There is one thing I am not
slow about." "I should be delighted to
hear you name it," sneered the proprie
tor. " Well," said the .clerk, slowly
"nobody can get tired as quick as I
can !" . A motion for a reconsideration of
his case has been referred to the proper
committee.—Des Moines Register.
TOWANDA, BRADFORD COUNTY, PL, THURSDAY
Japanese Top Spinning.
At certain seasons of the year top
spinning engages a great part of the
leisure time of American and English
boys, and some of them 'become very
skillful. But Japanese jugglers are
the people to spin tops, and I will
try to describe some of their more
difficult feats, as .I saw them. I was
at a Japanese juggling entertainment,
and when the first part of the per
formance was over the men who had
been, acting cleared the stage, set on
it a small table, a number of swords,
and a little house, like the doll
houses sold in toy shops, bowed low
and left. Immediately afterward a
richly-dressed Japanese made his ap
pearance, carrying in his arms about
a dozen tops, . somewhat . resembling
common bumming-tops, each with a
long thin stem ran thmugli the bulb
shaped part, and protruding at the
top and bottom, the topste m being
cased in a loose sheath.
.Bowing to
the spectators, the Japanese took one
of the tops - and . twirled it briskly
between his palms for a' second or
two; he then dropped it upon the
table, where it spun around in that
swiftly-revolving but apparently
motionless‘ state that boy top-spin
nerii call "sleeping." The Japanese
indicated by sins;, that it would stop
when he told i to, and, turning to
ward the . tabl ; he li ft ed his hand
as a command. No sooner had fie
done this than the top
. stopped as if
it really had seen and understood the
signal,
The' Japanese picked up the top
again; and, twirling it as before,
placed it upon the table, where it
spun itself to sleep. He then select
ed from the swords on the floor one
with a long, keen blade, and, lifting
the top from the table by the sheath
of the upper stem, placed the point of
the lower stem carefully upon the
edge of the blade, near the hilt. The
top spun for some moments in this
position, and then began to run slow
ly toward the point of the sword.
When it had reached the point it
leaned .over at an angle of forty-five
degrees, and continued to revolve for
several-moments in that difficult po
sition, until it was caught in the jug
glees hand just as •it was about to
stop spinning. .
Throwing the sword to one side,
the performer sunk' made , the top
spin upon the t able, and, picking up
five others, started them also. He,
then 'stretched a thin wire'across the
stage, and, taking the tops from the
table, paced them.:one after another
upon the wire, as he had previously
placed the first one upon the edge of
the sword. They spun around for a
few seconds without moving; but
suddenly, as' if by one impulse, they
all started on an excursion along the ,
wire, balancing themselves as they
went, with all the nicety
-of expert
tight-rope walkers. Leaching the
end of the- trip, they dropped one
by one into the hands of an assist
ant who stood ready. to catch them.
—St. Nicholas. ,
The Colorado Shepherd.
bur shepherd must purchase his
sheep; and ' . hero come in a good
many honest differences of opinion.
as to. the kind which will give the
best results. Some will buy Cheap
"Mexicans," expecting, to breed a
better quality of lanibs; and then dis
pose of the original purchase. Others
affect the California stock, which of
late years - has come into favor in .
Some quarters. The weight of opin
ion, however,. would undoubtedly in
cline our enterprising young ranch
ero to buy sheep on the spot in good
condition, and, what iS very import
ant, thoroughly: acclimated. His,
" bucks " , (say .about three to each
hundred ewes) will generally be
merinoes. In the, autumn, we will
say he begins operations under favor
able auSpices.. His cabin is very_
plainly furnished, and his "corrals,"
or 'yards and sheds, properly con
structed and in readiness. For feed
lug in stormy weather he has enough
safely stored away ; and after, due
care and inquiryrhe has secured an ex
perienced' and competent herder—
better, an American. At daylight
all bands are called to breakfast, and
soon after the bleating flock are mov
ing over the range, and the herder,
I with his canteen slung over his
shoulder, and probably a book in his
pocket, has whistled to his'shepherd
dog and started sifter-their. During
the whole day they graze on the
short grass, - going once to water;
and afternoon sees them brought
back
_near to the corrals in which,
later .on, they arc again confined for
the night: Day after day, week after
week, month after month, pass in
monotonous round; and then the
cold weather comes, and the herder
puts on thicker coat, and reads less,
and walks about rapidly, and stamps
his feet for warmth'. And then some
day, when he is far away from the
ranch, there comes on that dreaded
enemy, of sheep raising—a prairie
spow storm. With but. little warning
the clouds have' (lathered and tee
snow is falling in thick and heavy
flakes. The sheep hurriedly huddle
together, .and no power can make
them move. The -herder may have
had time to get them into a gulch, or
under a bank ; failing in this, there is
nothing for it but _to stay with them,
sometimes; a day and a night, and
trust to, getting them home when the
storm is over. NoV far from Colora
do Springs is a gulch called the Big
Corral, in which more than one thou
sand sheep were lost a year or two
ago, having followed each other up to
the brink, and fallen over into the
deep snow. Nor did the Mexican
herder ever return to tell the tale, for
he shared their fate. It is with the
snow storm, indeed, that; the dark
side of the Colorado shepherd's life
is associated, and the great tempest
of the spring: of. 1878 left a sorrow
ful record behind it. •It must be
mentioned that Sheds are an innova
tion, that some ranches have none
even now, and that before they were
built the sheep were exposed, even in
the corrals, to the fury of the ele
ments. Per contra ; it should be said
that no such storms as that of March,
1878, has been known since there
were any sheep in this part , of the
REGARDLESS OF DENUNCIATION FROM ANY QUARTER.
country. On this occasion thousands
and thotthands of , sheep pe.rished.
The snow was eleien feet deep in the
corrals, and sheep were dug out alive
after being buried for tiro and even
three weeks! • Their vitality seams
very great, and many perish, not
from. the pressure of the snow, but
from suffocation caused By- others
falling Ot crowding upon them. It
is asserted that they sometimes, while
still buried, work their way down to
the grass and feed thereon. But our
shepherd has taken care to haie
plenty of sheds, and he knows, too,
that by the doctrine of chances be
need not count on such a storm more
than once in ten years, and he faces
the winter with a stout heart. When
ever it is possible to send the sheep
out, the herder takes them, despite
the weather;_ but. when that is im
possible or indiscreet, they are fed at .
home..
In May comes "lambing," and the
extra hands are busily engaged in
taking care of the young lambs.
With their mothers, they are separat
ed from the rest of the flock, first in
small " bunches," then in larger ones;
and in October they arc weaned. In
June comes shearing—an easy and
simple operation, and, if need be,
"dipping " or immersing the stock in
great troughs containing a . solution
of tobacco or lime, cures the " scab,"
and completes the year's programme.
Our shepherd sells - his wool, counts
the increase of his flock after wean
ing, and if, as it is to be hoped, he is
a good bookkeeper,' be sits down and
makes up his accounts ifor,the year.
is hard io picture a greater con
trast than that which ;exist§ between
the sheep and cattle business, the
freedom and excitement of the' latter
bearing about the same relation to
the humdrum routine of the former
as , dcts the appearance of the great
herd of often noble•looking animals
widely scattered over the plains, and
roaming sometimes for months. by
themselves, to that of the timid dock
bleating in the corral, and frightened
at the waving of a piece ,of white
paper. And then to think of the
ditierence between the life of the
"cow-puncher" (as he calls himself),
riding his spirited horse in the com
pany of "his fellows, and that of the
herder, on foot and in solitude, is
enough to make us wonder how men
can be found for one, while there is
the slightest chance of securing the
other.=,/farper's
DR. ORMISTON AND IV:1E TARDY
Fouts.—The Rev. Dr. Ormiston; of
New York, has sharp,. black eyes,
with . which he can almost look
through:anybody on whom be fixes
his gaze. Some years ago, when he
was called to his present charge in
the Reformed Church on Fifth aven
ue, he found, on entering the pulpit
on the first Sunday, that not many
of his congregation bad arrived. Re
waited until the time for beginning
the service, when he rose in his pul
pit ready to offer the opening prayer.
Still the - people kept coming down
the aisles one .at a. time. The preach
er stood perfectly silent iu his pulpit,
turning his penetrating glance to
each late-corner as he opened his pew
door, and for several minutes this
lenee upon his part was kept up up.'
til the last arrival had been seated.
This was an absolute cure for late-'
nen in that church, for the . Members
much preferred td Fit waiting in
their pews for a half hour before the
service rather than run the gauntlet
of their_pastor's keen eyes in the sol-1
emn stillness of his church. It was
a severe remedy, but the people were
forced toadmit that it was a thor
oughly suecessful one.
To Youxo litTsnANns.- —Love and. 1
appreciation are to woman what dew
and surfshine are to a flower. They
refresh and brighten her whole life.
They make her strong hearted and
keen sighted in every thing affecting
the welfare of her home. They ena
ble her to cheer her husband when
the cares of life press heavily upon .
him, and to be a very providence to
her children. To know that her hus
band loves her and is proud of her
and believes in her; that even her
faults are looked .upon with tender
ness; that.her face, to one at least,
is the fairest face in all the world ;
that the heart; which to her is the
greatest and nob‘est, holds her. sacred
in its inmost rdpesses above. all wo
men, gives her strength and courage
and sweetness and viiacity which all
the wealth of the world could not
bestow. Let a woman's life be per
vaded with such influences, -and her
heart and'inind will never grow old,
but will blossom , and sweeten and
brighten in perpetu,outh.
THEY Win TO MIX THEIR CICERO&
—lt was at the post-office in this vil
lage. The demoiselle was buxom,
bashful,, aged 13, and hailed from
Berrytown. She wanted a dollar's'
worth of stamps. One dollar's
worth," repeated the smiling assis
tant; "of what denomination?"
The damsel showed signs of embar
rassment and hesitated to reply. She
twirled her shawl fringe nervously,
cast her eyes about to see if any one
was near, moved a little closer to the
window, and finally asked in a tim
orous voice, "Do you hef to write it
down ?" By no means," answered
the courteous assistant; "that is not
necessary rbut I presume you have
some preference as to the denomina
tion." " Ah--well—yes," replied the
stranger, her face turning scarlet, "I
hey some. I generally go to the
'Piseopal Methodist myself,, but, the
fellow I'm buying the stamp§ for,
he's a Universal Orthodox."
Tan Pekin Gazette is nearly five hun
dred years old, and every now and then
an old man hobbles into the office and
pays a year's mibscription, with the re
mark that by has been a subsCriber ever
since the first number was printed. The
clerk,, without betraying any surprise,
observes, as he hands him a rveelpt
"Yes,
we have several names on our list
who have been subscribers from the
start." Then the old man goes out mut
tering something about this world being
full of liars.
"Now lay in your coal," says - an. ex
.change. The man who would proffer
ancb advice must' be a fuel.— Waterloo
Observer.
MORNDIG, JANUARY 29, 1880.
Reform and Corruption—The ',General's
Opinion of Civil Srvice Reforni—
. The Electoral Commission, Etc.
"Men in public life," said the
General, " are: like men: in other
spheres of life. It would be very
bard for me to say that Pknew six
men in' public position that I know
to be dishonest, of absolute moral
certainty.! Men will. do things who
are Senators - or members that re
formers call corrupt. They will ask
patronage and govern themselves/in
their dealings with the -Administra
tion by their success in the natter of
patronage. This is a - custom, and if
the reformer's theory is correct, it is
corruption. And yet the men who
were reformers, who turned their
eyes at the sins of others, I generally
found as anxious for, patronage as
others. Mr. Sumner, for instance,
who is the idol of the reformers, was
among the first Senators to ask offices
for his friends. 1I expected offices
as a right. Of course he spoke as a
Senator. He had no consideration
except as a Senator. If be had been
a private man in Boston he would
never have named a minister to Lon
don. As our public men go, as our
forms of government go, Mr. Sumner
and other Serators were perfectly
hone St. There was no corruption in
his asking me to appoint this man
and .the other. They regarded exec
utive appointmento for their friends
- as the- rewards of public life. Mr.
Edmunds asked me to keep Marsh in
Italy. The whole -Vermont delega
tion joined in the request. Yet no
Senator was more independent than
Edmunds, more ready to oppose the
Administration if he disagreed with
it—and so on down the whole list.
It was a rule. In a 'government
where there are Senators and mem
bers, • where Senators and members
depend upon politics for success,
there will be applications for patron
age. You cannot call it corruption
—it is a condition of our representa
tive form of government—and yet if
you read •the newspapers, and hear
the stories of the retiirmers,.you will
be told that any asking for place is
corruption. My experience of men
makes me very charitable in my crit
icism of public officers. I think our
Government is honestly and econom-,
ically managed, that our, civil service
is as good as any in the ,worlik.that I
have seen, and the men in office are
men who, as a. rule, do their blest for
the country -and the Government.
There is no man in the country,"
continued the. General; " so envious
for civil reform as the President of
the United States for the time being.
lie is the one person most interested.
Patronage is the bane of the Presi
dential office. A large share of the
vexations and cares- come from pat
ronage. Re is necessarily a civil
service reformer., because be wants
peace of mind.. Even apart from this
I was anxious when I became Presi
dent to have a civil service reform
bread enough to include all that its
most earnest friends desired. I gave
it an honest and fair trial, although
George William CuraSthinks I did
not. One reason, perhaps, for Mr.
Curtis's opinion- may be that he does
not know as much about the facts as
I do There is a good deal of cant
about civil service- ,reform, which
throws doubt upon the sincerity of
the movement. The impression is,
s p,i
given by the advocate 1 of -civil ser
vice reform that most o tbe execu
tive appointments are ade out of 1
the penitentiary. Writers who have
reached years of discretion, like John
, Jay, gravely assert that .one-fourth
lot the revenue collecte in the New
York Custom House is lost in pro
cess of 'collection. Of clime, no re
form can be sound wh n it is sus
tained by such wild andaistounding- t
declarations.' Then' many of* those
who talk civil service reform in pub
lic; are the most persistent in seeking
offices for their friends. Civil service
reform rests entirely with Congress.
If members and Senators will give
up claiming patronage, that will be a
step gained. But there is an immense
amount of human nature in members
of Congress, and it is in human na
ture to seek power and use it to help
friends. •An Executive niust consider
Congreee t A government . machine
must run; and an Executive depends
on Congress. The members have
their rights as well as himself.- if
,he wants to get along with Congress,'
have the Government go smoothly,
and secure wholesome legislation, hp
must be in sympathy; with ConOess.
It has become the habit of CongresS
men to share with the Executive iti
the responsibility of appointments.
It is unjust to say that this habit is
necessarily corrupt. It is simply a
custom that has grown up; a fact
that cannot be ignored. 'The Presi-
I dent very rarely appoints, he merely
registers the appointments of mem
bers of Congress. In a country as
vast as ours the advice of congress
men as to persons to be appointed is
useful, and generally for the best in •
terest of the cone - try. The long
continuance orthe Republican party
in 'power really assures us a civil
Service reform. Mr. Hayes's admin
istration will close the twentieth year
of Republican 'rule. These twenty
years have built up a large body of
experienced servants in• all depart
ments of the Government. The only
SHADOWED.
The robins In the mapia,baild
Thellr dwelling, as of old ;
Ageln the breaking dawn is thrilled
With lots In music : told.
And sunny Welds, by no man tilled,
Are brave in cloth of gold.
The autumn wears her former grace,
Her sweet wlnds'wander by ;
. miss no beauty. from her face, '
No glory from - her sky;
And yet.--ah yet--each pleasant place
In shadow seems to lie.
,
Lastyearah some were with as then
To breathe of summer air,
Now passed beyond our utmost ken—
Beyond qar loftiest prayer;
Our hearts were irell-nlith broken when
Ood took them to his eue.
Oh t let as hear these wintry days,
Nor dliu our griefs they mock ;
So shall our tears he changed to praise,
'Our souls, •mid sudden shock,
Our beary-pressing troubles, raise
Their [matins to Carlst, the Mick.
TALK WITH GEN. GRANT.
•
.*
break was when Mr. Johnson was at
enmity with his party, and filled
many °Mee& with incompetent men.
I suffered from that: Most of my
early removals and appointments
were to weed out• the bad men ap
pointed by Johnson. Mr. Hayes has
had no such trouble. I made 'Some'
removals •in the beginning that I
should not have done, by the mere
exercise of the executive power, with
out adequate reason. But, as I came
to know the politicians, this ceased.
I - was always resisting this pressure
from Congressmen, and I could re
call many macs where nothing but
resistance saved good men. Take,
for instance, General Andrews, for
mer Minister to Sweden. General
Andrews made an admirable minis
ter, with a brilliant record. When I
was in Sweden the 'King told me
that he 'had been the best minister
we had ever sent there: His record
confirmeld this. - Pressure came to
remove him, even from men who had
asked his original appointment.l He
had been away, he was out of 'poli
tics, a new man would help.the party
in Minnesota, and so ob. I did not
think the ,Republican party in Min
nesota needed much help, and I• said
that I did not see how, in the face of
"his record, I could fail to recommis
sion General Andrews. If it had
been ray first term I could not have
stood the pressure. These two inci
dents occur to me as showing how
Congressional influence g ave us so.
goodd - a man as Marsh , and took away
so good a man as Andrews. They
illustrate my meaning when I say
that the Executive does not appoint,
but registers appointments. More
over, the Republican party has never
been proseriptiFe. Mr. Lincoln had
to make many emovals and appoint.
ments, but this came from the seces
sion movement • Mr. Lincoln was
always glad to recognize loyal Dem
ocrats, and in all the departments in
Washington a loyal Democrat was
certain to remain. As a consequence
of this policy, I suppose it is not too
much to say that one-fourth,
if not
more, of the officers of the Govern
ment in Washington are Democrats.
They were never disturbed. I never
removed men because they 'were
Democrais, if they were otherwise fit.
I never thought of such a thing, nor
does Mr. Hayes. 1 4 `iiis shows that
civil service reform i ts growing in
America, in the only way it can grow
naturally—through the long continu
ance of one party in power, and the
consequent education of an experi
enced class of public servants. That
is the only way. Ai for censuring a
President because there is no civil
service reform written in rules and
books, it is absurd, for, as I have
said, the President, whoever he is, is
the one man in; the country most
anxious for the reform. Notwith
standing all that is said by the news:
papers, I am convinced that our civil
service, take it all and all throughout
the country, is in as high a sta te of
efficiency, am), I think, higher than
that of any other nation in' the
world."
Out of this arose a question as to
the abuse which had crept into_ our
elections,- the abuse of assessing pub=
lie officials fOr funds to carry on
elections. " I see," said the . General,
"in some of the newspapers, that
under Mr. Hayes it is a subject for
congratulation that the office-holders
are no longer removed because they
will not ray assessments for political
campaigns. I never remove& a man
for such a refusal, never knew one of
cabinet to do so, and if I had ever
knbwii it, I Would have dismissed.
the officer who ;had made such re
movalst • Statements like this Belong
to 'tilt ant of the - civil service ills:-
cussio and throw doubt upon the
sincerity of 'those, who advocate the
reforni. I can see where our service
can be amended. But every day the
Republican party remains• in. power
amends it, . As to competitive exain
matioes, they are
.of questionable I
utility. One of the most . brilliant , '
candidates before the civil service
board was in.4ail •ery soon after, his
appoihtment, s for robbery. The nay
to achieve the best civil service-
first to influence ;Congressmen,. "said
induce them to refrain from pressure.
upon the Eiecuti ye ; them pass', laws,
giving each office a special tel
then keep the Republican party in
powell until the process of education
is- complete. As it is now, the, nly.
.danger I see to civil service reform
is in the triumph of the Democratic
party. As .it is; if . , our friends •it
home would only be candid and see
it, civil service reform has been gegrig
on ever since 1861, with' the exep=
tion of the end of Johnson's term.
During those years there has grown
up an educated, tried, and trusty
body of public servants. They can
not' be displaced without injury.
There are black sheep now and then,
failures from time to time. But the
great body of the public service could
not be improved.
" There is nothing I have longed
for so much," said the General, "as
a period of repose in our politics,
that would make it a matter of indif
ference. to patriotic men which party
is in power. I long for that. I am
accused, I see, of having a special
aversion to Democracy. People used
to remind me that I, voted for Bu
chanan, and call mac a renegade. The
reason I voted for Buchanan was
that I knew Fremont. That was the
only vote I ever cast.
"If I had ever had any political
sympathies they would have been
with the Ntlhigs.- I was raised- in
that school. I have no objection ) to
the Democratic party as it existed
before the war. I hope again to see
the time when I will have no objee
lion to it. Before the war, whether
a man was Whig or Democrat, he
was always for the country. Since
the' war the Democratic party • has
always been against the country.;
That is the fatal_ defect in the Demo
cratic organization, and why I should
see with alarm its advent to power."
I remember hearing the ; General
describe the inside history of - the
Electoral Commission, and of his
own part in that movement. Many
ot the - things.he said belong. to the
'history which one day may writ
ten. To write them now would be
premature. " Nothing," said the
$l.OO per Annum In,Advance.
General, "Could have been wiser
than the Electoral CommisaiOn, and
nothing could be more unpatriotic
than the attempt to impair the title
of Mr. Hayes as fraudulent. There
was a. good deal of cowardice. and
knavery in that effort. Mr. Hayes is
just as much ,President as any of his
predecessors., The country cannot
too highly honor the men who de
vise,d and carried through the Elec
toral Commission. Mr.. iConleing,
especially, did grand service in that.
He showed himself brave enough to
rise 'above party. •The crisis was a
serious one, and for me one of pecu- .
liar annoyance. There is something
radically wrong about our manner of
attaining and `declaring the results of
a Presidential. election which ' I am
surprised bas . .not been'ainended. It
used to worry Morton a great deal,
and on previous occasions we had
trouble'about it. The simple duty
of declaring -who has the largest
number of vote's should be easily
done: We should never go through
another Electoral Commission ex
citement. This is a question which'
should he decided free from politics,
and yet, 'it iadelayed and paralyzeo
from purely political considerations.
Histoiy; however, will - justify the
Electoral Commission as a fine bit of
self-government on the part of the
people. I say this without regard to
its decision. I would have thought
the same if Tilden had been elected."
The question was asked, as -to
whether the General had any fear of
an outbreak as the result of the Com
mission.. " That was the-least of my
fears," said the General. " I never
believed there would be a blow, but
I had so many warnings that I made
all my preparations. I knew all
about the rifle clubs of South CIITO-
Iina,TOr instance, the extent of whose
organization, has, never been made
known. I Was quite prepared for
any, 'contingency.- Any outbreak
would have been , suddenly and sum
niarily stopped. So far as that was
concerned my course was clear and
my mind , was made up. I did not
intend to have two governments, nor
any South American prounciamentos.
I did not intend to receive com
missioners from sovereign States,' as
Buchanan did. If Tilden was de
clared elected I intended to hand
him over the reins, and see' him
peacefully installed. I should have
treated him as cordially as I did
Hayes, for the question of the Presi
dency was then .neither personal nor
political, but national. 1 tried to act
with the utmost impartiality between
the two. I would not have raised
My finger to have pat Hayes in, if in
"so doing I did Tilden the slightest
injustice. All ' , wanted was for the
legal powers to declare a President,
to keep the machine running, to.allay -
the passions of the canvass, and allow
the country peace. lam profoundly
grateful that the thing ended as it
did without devolving upon me new
responsibilities. The day that brought
about the result and enabled me to
leave the White House , as I did, I
regard as one of the hapPiest in my
life. I telq, personally, that I .had
been vouchsafed a special deliver ;
ance. It wss a great blessing to the
country—the peaceful" , solution, I
mean. I cannot see how any patri
otic man can think otherwise. We
had, peace, and circler, and observance"
of the law, and the world had a new
illustration of the dignity and ern
ciency of the Republic . . This we -owe
to, the wisdom and foresight of the
men who formed the Electoral' Cora-
Mission,. Democrats as-well as Re
publicans.
" At the same time, I think,' } said,
the General, continuing the donver.
sation, " that we should revise our
electoral laws, and prevent the re
newal of such a crisis. I have thought
a good deal over this subject of the
duration -of the Presidential office.
I have read with
of
the discus
sion.s arising out of it.
.These discus
sions have done good, at.'d- • our peo
pie, with their great
,common sense,
will come to -a solution. .My owl}
niind is not clear as to which would
be the. best - plan. The one-term' idea,
has many 'arguinents in Its favorid
Perhaps one term, without a re-elec
tion, for six or seven years would be
as good as any other. The argument
against a second term, that a, Presi
dent is tempted to use hii patronage
to re-elect 'himself, is noVsound. The
moment a. President used his office
for such a purpose he would fail. It
would be the suicide of his adminis
tration. It would offend the piople,
and array.against him public men,
'roast of whom: are dreaming of the
sUccession-for themselves, and would
.resent a policy they deemed to be an
invasion of, their own rights. There
is nothingin that argument. Pat
ronage does not strengthen a Piesi.
- dent. When you take up the 4hes
tion of -second or third terins„ and
propose perinanent inelegibility after
ward, you are encountered with the
argument that in a free government
a people have' a right to elect' whom
soever they please, and that because
a man has served the country well
he should not at the end of his term
be in the position of an officer cash
iered from, the army. What you
want to avoid, it seems to me, is not
re-elections, but frequent electiona.•
I think the best planome that would
go
_farther to satisfy all opinions,
would be one term for six of seven
years, and ineligibility to re election.
Practically, this 'would settle the
question. Eligibility after an litter
vening term would not be of much
value, for; in our' country, most of'
the men who served one term would
be past
the age for re-election - by the
time another had intervened. The
Swiss plaia, of short terms would not
do for a country as large and new as
ours. It- is well enough for a small,
ancient, populous, and highly-devel-•
oped republic." 7 -From "Around the
'World with General Grant," by John
Russell Young.
Trti man who can devour a dozen and
a half raw - oysters at ode sitting is the
Man tor eighteen stet he. t What ho,
without there? Seize him and hurl him
from the loftiest battleinents of the don
jon keep into the foaming portculis that
flows past the postertflate.l It is done.
The limpid ripples of the silently flowing
turret close above the eddying sally-port,
and ad is over."--Burefette.
Tat man wbo organizes a new brass
band is viler than he that destroyeth
city. -
A VAN with a brick in his bat is regard
ed as a - disgraceful object. A woman with
cotton in her---But no; let us be mag
nanimous, and only pitch into the istrong- 1 -
er sex.
. •
- A NET in the Whitehall rime+ ex-,,
claims : "I am haunted, wierdly haunt:
ed, by the" dripping of the ram. The
Boston Past advises new shingles as a
remedy.••_ a
IL man sensitive tn . everithing that
beautiful in nature can hive more enjoy
ment in looking up - into the sky than wit
nessing the best of plays on the mimic
'stage. ,
'Hassan Mont says that: there is one
single fact that one may oppose to all the
wit and argument of infidelity—that no
mats ever repented of Christianity On his
deathbed.
kl,llkl 3S:1E:1.1
Tux two important events in the life of
man are when he examines his upper lip
and sees•the hair coming, and when - he
examines-the top of his head and sees the
hair going.
SOME persons move through life .as a
band of music moves down the. street,
flinging out pleasure ,on • every side
through. the air to- every one, far and
near, that cares to listen.
Sows was one of the seven wise men
Of Greece. De never stopped •to (argue
when his wife told hid) to get out of his
warm bed and build afire in the-kitchen
stove.— Wheeling Leader.
. CAD (dOillk the grand)—" Haw, wait.
ah ! bottle of champagne.'? Waiter—
"Yessir. Dry, sir?" Cad—" What's it
to you whether, Pin dry, .or whether I
ain't?. Bring me the wile." ,
IT is sn in politic;, business and "every
wherein life. Tbe man whom you boost,
up the tree not only forgets to toss, you
down some of the fruit, • but; is as likely
as not to pelt you with the chawings.
As Auctioner was endeavoring to sell
a fowling : p ece, and failing to get a bid,
a hystaudiir who bad read the papers •
said : " BIOw in the muzzle, and it will
go off !"—Veicago
FAST men, like fast horses, have
record's. Those of the former are kept at
the police court, and some -of them can
show a gait that would make 'tarns feel
like a dray-horse.—Keokuk Gate (fag.
Tag first two years of a man's life he' •
,"boss" of the house .. Prom t,
the time on ward it IBA struggle until by 1'
mazriago he surrenders unconditionally,
on the plea of " business cares:"—New
llaren Register. - 4
Tin!" Zulu lady wears her wedding-ring •
in her node. A double purpose is thus
served : It discourages promiscuous kiss
ing, and she is in little danger
,of losing
her ring. She always nose where it is.—
Boston Transcript.
THE Elmira Advertiaer knows a girl
who will wrestle with-a croquet-mallet in: . '
the hot sun for hours and not complain.l',
-But just ask her to hold on to the wood
en end 'of a liroom for a few minutes, and
she'll have a fit. -
GE-NERAL HOOKER didn't care if a sot.'
dier fell out of line to get . a good rest
across Or his gun ; but, if he wanted to.go
to the rear fora drink of water • the old
man would yell : "Spit. cotton, d---n
ye, spit cotton -till we've- driven
back ' -
Ax emaciated humorist, who had been ,
sick for a long time, was required by his
doctor to have a large mustard plas
ter put on his chest. "Look here,
doctor, isn't that a great deal of mustard
when the'quaptity of meat is:, taken 'into
consideration?" asked the sufferer.
Wiwi you see a man with a gun on his
shoulder and three,dogs at hiS heels mak
ing
- across the country, , von needn't feel
bad for the rabbits. , miss a crow or
two,And a few frozen applesi fall into a,
crck,, and return-home believing ho has
had a thundering big time. -
As Irishman was accused of stealing . .at
handkerchief of a fellow traveler, but the'".
owner, on tindieg it, apologized to Pat ,
and said that it was a mistake. "Airah,
my jewel: my jewel,"., retorted Pat, "it
was a two-sided mistake-r-you took me
for a thaif and I took you for a gentle
man." . .
THE siabject of conversation .at an ev
ening entertainment was the intelligence
of • aniMals,
.particularly dogs. Says
Smith : " There are dogs that have more
sense than their masters," • "Just so,"
-responds young Fitznoodle, - "I've got
that kind of a dog myself."
Lpnn whose popularity wadi not
excessive in the. Scotch town of
having refusedjn importunate beggar, she
renewed her applications with : 'Now,
me Lord, if ye'd just give me one little
sixpence, I could treat every friend ye
have in. the town." I •
"lIELEN's Babies"- have moved to
Binghamton. They started •a life in a
barn the other day, and explained, after
it had been put out, that they " wanted
to see the firemen roll the cart !" Tlie
view was denied them ; but 'they had a
view Of the thior, instead, from the atti
tude of their papa's• knee.—Bufato Ex-
Fun, Fact and Facetiae.
O'FLANAGA "-Well, Barney . „
when you come to see your landlord, 'ye
moigiit put a coat on you."'Barney.: "Is
it coat, your honor? Shure-, thin, the
ownly &cent coat I'll be having is jist a
bundle of howls stitched tigethurr,' and
Aorra a rag else—and that same in pawn
had'eess to it intoirly."
A WOULD-11F. editor was advid .once
to try the effect of his writings upon the
folks at home without confessing its au
thorship. His mother fell asleep ; his sis
ter groaned ; his brothe"r asked him to
stint, up ; and at last his wire tapped him
on the shoulder, with the sweetest possi
ble :1‘;. Won't that do ?"•±Saratiah- Re
corder-.
-
A. YOUNG physician, wholiad written a
"History of the. Origin of
. Medicine,"
asked of an old physician Pertpission to.
submit the manuscript for his -inspection
and criticism. The perthission was.grant
ed and the manuscript forwarded. 'lts
opening lineti were : " Most 'assuredly the
first doctor in the world was Cain.". The
old physician read no further.
"Pv.rsa, what are you doing to that -
boy?" asked a schoolmaster. "lie want
ed to knowlf you
.take . ten from seven-.
teen bow many will remain.- I took ten
of his apples to show, him, and now Jie
wants me to give 'em back." " Well,
wby don't you do it ?"" "Cos, sir, he
would forget how many are left."
. "SomE more cheese, please," said a
small boy of eight to his papa at. dinner.'
"No, my child," Was the -reply of the
prudent parent . ; "you have already had
enough.• When I was a child I had to.
eat my bread, and smell my_ cheese."
" Well," said "sonny, "please - give me a
piece to smell."
It: a recent moot c6urt trial one of the
disputants closed his argument in a way
that, to say the least, was novel, and
which ran something in this. wise,: .
"From what I have said, your Donor,
the law, in this case, appears to be about
all on ,our side, and if it does not so ap
pear, it is the fault, not of the law, but
of a feeble interpretation."— Columbia
Spectator. • . - •
Ax artist who recently painted a pic
ture of a certain General, received two
callers, the other day, who - wished to look
-upon the counterfeit presentment. It
was shown ; and one of the visitors, who
spoke with the brogue that General Scott
admired `so much, approached thei
ness with the evident intention of putting
hR finger upon it and pointing out what
,he conceived to be some special excel
lence, remarking,. at the. same :time:
" Dedad ! it's the Gineral !", The fright
ened artist of course followed,' saying :
" Don't touch it ! It's not - dry !" Be
dad, thin," 'said Pat, "it's not the Giner..
al I".—Bristol Bee. •
DR. CUTLER - Os DatirK.—Peliver
itnees from confirmed , drunkenness'
are exceedingly - rare. Temporary
reformation too often ends in hope
less Sottishitess. The power of alco
holic appetite is one of the " powers
of darkness." It is like a poasession
by seven devils. God only can cast :
them out. The solemn le,sion of this
fact is that the only safety lies in, to
abstinence.. Wherefore let us ex
hort the sober, the young and -espe
cially the children that the only sure
way to- ,the doom of drunken
ness is to keep out of -the rapids
which lead
. swiftly down to the
depths of perdition. - _